Its strange how one minute you know who you are, what your life is and the next, everything is thrown into chaos and nothing makes sense anymore. She was Helen, a youth worker living in the small town of Keswick, England. She had a dog, two cats and a horse stabled not far away. She lived alone for four years, the occasional boyfriend, no siblings and her parents lived down south where she'd visit once a month.
But the life she knew was now somehow meshed with a life buried deep down behind a magical fog. She remembers Daniel her brother, her real parents dying when she was ten years old and Daniel looking after her. He had ran their parents old cottage, started working with farmers and mill workers to feed them. But one day he had returned with such a smile on his face it was blinding. He had found a job at an estate working with horses. It was three times his previous wage, but the only issue was that he had to work weeks at a time and spend it living on the grounds to train the horses.
She was so happy for him, Daniel always loved horses, ever since he was old enough to climb on top of one, so the opportunity was to good to pass up. But he was hesitant, she was only fourteen and understandingly, her big brother didn't want to leave her on her own for weeks at a time. In the end, Helen was able to persuade him this change would be good for them. She was fourteen but she wasn't a kid anymore, she knew how to run their little cottage and loved to grow her own vegetables in the small plot out front.
After several months, they both got into a routine and life was good for them. Daniel had even found someone he really liked and would speak about the raven haired beauty none stop. He was enthralled and she couldn't be happier for him. She had wanted to meet the apple of her brothers eye several times, but Daniel had mentioned it wasn't the right time with work and the mystery woman's parents being of higher class.
It was almost a year into the arrangement when her brother had made an unexpected appearance one night. He was panicked, crazed even as he told her to pack her stuff and make sure she was ready for a long journey. She was scared, she'd never seen her brother so frightened. She tried to ask what was going on but he told her to be ready and then rode off back to the estate.
That was the last time she saw him. She had sat on her bed all night, her satchel and bags packed by the door but as the candles burnt down, she had fallen asleep waiting for Daniel to return. The next thing she knows, shes waking up in another realm with different memories and calling complete strangers mum and dad.
The memories are now fresh in her mind, blindingly colorful and she cant help tears rolling down her cheeks. What happened? Where's Daniel?
Crystal blue eyes slide open, Helen slowly sitting up in a familiar Queen size bed and taking in the familiar features of her previous bedchambers. She remembers everything, but its of no comfort. Having two identities clogging her mind is overwhelming, almost like a box being crammed with too much stuff.
With a steady pace, Helen dislodges herself from the sheets, sliding from the bed in her hideous nightwear and approaches the vanity. She quickly routes through its contents but is unable to find what she needs.
"I see your awake."
With a startled squeak, Helen whirls to find the Queen suddenly behind her. She studies the woman, surprised at the lack of heavy makeup and the light grey dress flowing from the woman's shoulders. Its almost as if an entirely different Queen is stood in front of her. They stare at one another, both shifting and avoiding direct eye contact.
Helen clears her throat, unable to take the awkward silence much longer.
"I..I remember who Daniel is."
The Queen swallows, nervously shifting her hands at her waist and focus flickering around the chamber.
"Yes I saw. The spell allowed me to access your memories and see them for myself."
Helen nods, frowning a little.
"So I guess I'm from the Enchanted Forest. I had a family here, so I think I need to find my brother.."
The Queen quickly refocuses, Helen oblivious to the royals increased agitation.
"..But I want to thank you for your hospitality your majesty. If it wasn't for you, I would never have remembered Daniel or my life here. I'm in your debt."
Age old etiquette creeps back into Helen's mind, Her birth mothers lesson in respecting others higher her station prompts her to curtsy and bow her head as best as she can. When she straightens, a smile creeps onto pale lips. The Queen seems to stare at her for an uncomfortable amount of time, so with nothing more to say, Helen heads for the exit, confused as to how shes going to find Daniel, but even more so, where shes going to find appropriate clothing. If she was still the Helen from Keswick, she would have asked the Queen for help. But now, she knows better.
"Wait!"
She stops abruptly, quickly refocusing on the nervous looking royal. Helen watches curiously as the woman's soft features slowly slip behind a perfect mask befitting a Queen.
"I wont allow you to just venture off into the Enchanted Forest alone wearing nothing but a nightgown. A great many things have changed since you left, and we need to discuss some..personal issues."
"Personal Issues? I'm sorry I don't understand.."
The Queen glides towards the double doors, eyes never leaving her guest.
"I will have someone run you a bath and have fresh clothes sent up. After you have finished, let the guard outside know and you will be escorted to dinner. I will meet you in the dining hall when you are ready."
Helen's mouth drops open to reply but she cant find the words. Why is the Queen being so nice to her all of a sudden? She watches fascinated as emotion creeps back into auburn eyes before the royal is suddenly stalking from the room almost spooked.
"What the hell was that about?"
Her mumble echos around the chamber, her mind not only processing her new memories, but the Queens curious behavior. She sighs, rubbing her temple and wanders to the window. She stares out across the Enchanted Forest, the view shrouded by darkness, exempt the occasional orange glow in the distance. She smiles, remembering the simple times, but her smile slips, the life she built in the other realm all but gone. What about her other worldly parents? What about her house and her pets? What will happen to them?
After hours of thinking, bathing and feeling like a real person again, Helen looks at herself in the spiraled mirror, a lengthy light green dress hugging her and flowing at the waist. Her hair is pinned up, her makeup light and somehow her previous bruises have all but disappeared. She doesn't question it, but has an inkling the Queen has something to do with their disappearance.
A knock at the door jostles her, one of the maids left lingering in her room opens it and two guards stomp in, and to her surprise, bow at her.
"The Queen has instructed us to escort you to dinner my lady."
My Lady? Helen cant help fidgeting, nerves bundled in the pit of her stomach. Whats with all the finer treatment? A bath was one thing but now shes got a royal escort?
"Um..Okay."
The guards position front and back, and before she knows it, shes being lead through the onyx halls and into a large dining chamber. A spacious and lengthy oak table sits in the center, a royal red table cloth lining the middle and silver candlesticks at every interval. She eyes the two places that are set at the head of the table but its the antsy Queen who quickly stands from her seat that captures Helen's focus.
With a flick of the royals wrist, the two guards quickly exit the chamber and they're left in silence once more.
"Please."
The Queen motions to the seat on her right and Helen bows her head, a mummer of thanks as she slips into it. She eyes the many forks and knives in front of her, desperate to avoid the intense stare she knows the Queen is giving her. After a pause she clears her throat, intent on getting some answers.
"So..You wanted to speak with me your majesty?"
"Yes. But I would prefer we eat first, I'm not a negligent host."
"Of course your not. Except when your locking me in the dungeon without a coat."
Helen chuckles, some of her recently acquired sass pulling through. But when the Queen stares at her unamused, her smile disappears, her nerves returning.
They sit in silence for the remainder of the meal, Helen shifting uncomfortably when she catches the Queen staring intently every now and again.
Her fork gently hits porcelain, a napkin wiped on pink lips. That lamb was beautifully cooked. She'd forgotten how tasty the food is in this land, no frozen or microwavable meals, all freshly cooked ingredients, including the meats. Helen looks up and again auburn eyes are on her. She cant help a small frown.
"I apologize but, is there something on my face?"
The Queen seems to snap out of her thoughts, downing her third glass of wine.
"No, you just...remind me of someone."
"Well now that dinner is over, would her majesty like to talk?"
The Queen almost seems hesitant, but after a loud and hefty sigh, harsh features soften and refocus on her guest.
"It is about your memories, your past."
"You know about my past?"
"In part, yes."
Helen frowns.."Daniel..You had his ring. How?"
"We crossed paths.."
"Is he here?!"
Helen almost jumps from her seat, excitement bubbling within her. According to her memory flashes, The Queen must know Daniel somehow, he had that same ring around his neck for month before the night he disappeared.
"Is he still at the Mills estate?! Still working with the horses?!"
The Queens hand snaps up, silencing her bombardment of questions, so she waits, shifting in her seat.
"Daniel used to work on my mothers estate six years ago."
"Your mothers? But I thought..?"
She pauses, deep in though and recollects their previous conversations. The Queen said she married at an early age, said her parents were wealthy and had an estate. Daniel worked on the Mills estate, fell in love with a raven haired woman a higher status than his own..Helen's eyes nearly pop out of her head.
"You..Your the woman he fell in love with. But, you said your Fiancee died.."
The cogs turn, bits a pieces slotting into place before Helen launches to her feet, her chair clattering the floor behind as she makes a mad dash for the exit. Tears swim through her vision, hand squeezing her chest. Her brother, her only family is dead.
The Queen suddenly appears in front of the exit in a swirl of purple smoke, Helen sliding to an abrupt stop and scowling.
"Let me out!"
"Please, we need to talk about Dan.."
"NO!"
The Queen startles, her own painful tears matching the crumbling woman.
"You don't get to speak his name! This is all your fault! He died because of you!"
"Snow White.."
"Screw Snow White! She didn't rip his heart from his chest! She didn't risk running away! Your very good at blaming Snow but what about you?! He'd still be alive if you didn't convince him that risking his family, risking his life was worth loving a woman he just met!"
A primal fury ignites in tortured brown eyes as a hand is quickly raised and Helen finds herself soaring backwards and landing harshly on the floor.
"How dare you! How dare you question our love! He loved ME! He chose ME! We were destined to be together!"
Helen winces, pulling her bruised body up and standing slowly. She scowls, eyes puffy and red, an arm cradling her aching side.
"I don't know what he saw in you! Your nothing like the stories, not even close! He used to say how you were so kind and selfless, how even on the darkest days you would smile and the whole room would light up! And you know what? I actually admired this woman, I begged Daniel again and again to bring her home so I could meet her, but your not that woman, your a tyrant, dark and vengeful and full of hate towards a little girl who told a secret! You don't deserve his love! Daniel would be ashamed of who you've become!"
Helen sneers, watching satisfied as the Queen recoils violently, the woman's anger melting away for something akin to grief and hurt. A part of her feels guilty, but the larger part, the part that mourns for her brother revels in the pain shes caused. So when the Queen suddenly disappears in a swirl of purple smoke, Helen finally lets herself breathe.
She storms over to the door, throwing it open and ignores the curious guards and maids as she stomps through marble halls. The manic scene repeats in her head, the Queen, both of them almost scrapping over Daniels love. Its not until Helen finds an empty study that she finally lets herself cry. She slides to the floor, her knees tucked to her chest and sobs wracking through her.
The happy memories are the worst, they make her feel like her whole world has ended, like she should just let the Queens mother rip her heart out too. What's she to do now?
There's a faint pitch, like a howling through the wind. Glassy eyes peer up and sweep the study. She frowns when a blue glob catches her eye. Slowly she climbs to her feet, slipping behind a large wooden desk and startles finding her friend from the woods.
The little blue mass swivels left and right, bumping itself against a drawer in the desk. She frowns, gently kneeling down to study it.
"You want to get in there?"
The mass continues to bump into the wood, so tentatively, her hand reaches out and slides the drawer open. Her friend quickly dives in, Helen peering inside to find the glob sat atop a small black book. Blue eyes scout the room briefly before shes plucking the tome from the drawer and studying the cursive writing on the first page.
"A diary..?"
Helen looks to her glowing blue friend but he's suddenly gone. Exhausted, she sits herself down at the small desk, her focus sliding back to the book in her hands. Its quite worn, the diary used many times to take the harboring feelings of its author. Her stomach churns, she has a feeling she knows whose diary it is, but should she really be reading something so personal? In the end, after staring at the black cover for over twenty minutes, the first page is flicked open and she studies its contents...
The candle wick is nearly burnt out by the time she finishes, the sky outside dark and the room barely lit by the three quarter moon hanging in the sky.
"Oh Daniel..I'm such an idiot."
A tear coasts down her cheek, one of many these past few hours. Shes read every page in all their gory detail and she knows shes made a mistake.
Quickly the diary is returned to its proper place and Helen is out the door and searching for the brooding Evil Queen.
"That's even if she'll speak to me. I'm such an idiot!"
Helen stops abruptly, black guard stationed at the end of the corridor, standing vigilant either side of towering black wooden doors. If she were the Queen, she'd want to be left alone, no guests and no interruptions.
Her flat pumps patter against the marble floor, quickly approaching the restricted area and as predicted, two armored guards suddenly block her way.
"The Queen is not to be disturbed."
"I know but I really need to talk to her."
"Shes not to be disturbed."
Helen huffs frustrated, a way in dwindling. Granted the Queen should be allowed to wallow after what was said between them, but it was a mistake. Daniel wouldn't want this, clearly a higher power has been pushing them together ever since that portal opened and sucked her through into the Enchanted Forest.
"Now listen here tin man! I need to speak with the Queen, its important, and I'm not moving from this spot until you go in there and tell her."
The soldiers glance at one another, but Helen groans irritated when their shoulders square and they nudge her backwards.
"Shes not to be disturbed."
Crystal eyes peer behind the unmovable soldiers, staring at solid oak.
"I know your listening! Please your majesty! I need to talk to you!"
She waits anxiously, her palms sweaty and rubbing against her aching ribs. She certainly inherited her Fathers temper, Daniel was the calmer of he two but grief can do strange things to people. She can be fiery and temperamental when defending her loved ones, but besides that, shes always been the most reasonable of the two.
A small smile pulls at pink lips when the double doors open slightly, allowing entrance for one. She quickly slides through, just encase the invitation is rescinded and jumps a little when the doors slam shut behind her. She peers through the darkness, the grand bedchambers all but destroyed, mirrors shattered, windows broken, the bed a smoldering heap. She swallows, her attention drawn to the lone figure sat on the floor in front of a grand fireplace.
The Queen doesn't face her, doesn't even respond when Helen steps in behind the woman. Helen peers around the small frame, noting red puffy eyes staring stoically at the flames. She sighs, guilt now eating her alive as she lowers herself to the floor and sits cross legged next to the royal. For a moment she stares at the object of the Queens focus, the flames licking the metal grate, the logs charred a deep black and crumbling.
"I'm sorry."
Helen refocuses, her apology echoing around them, her focus noting the way auburn eyes flicker down to the Queens hands where a small metal ring resides.
"You were right, Its my fault he's gone."
Helen shakes her head, scooting closer to the woman and boldly lays her hand atop the Queens.
"No, I was wrong. I was angry and bitter and I took my frustration out on you. Its not your fault Daniel died, he loved you so much and he would have done anything to protect you."
Helen watches with a heavy heart as quiet sobs escape the broken Queen. Shes read the diary, Daniel and Regina were perfect together, that's until Regina's sadistic mother interfered. The real person to blame is the old hag, not Regina and not Snow White. Perhaps this is why shes been brought here, perhaps she can help mend the broken Queen.
Without a second thought, Helen wraps the Queen in her arms, ignoring the slight resistance from the other woman, but after a beat, timid arms wrap around her waist, Helen holding her brothers former fiancee through her grief.
Its not until the flames in the fireplace are reduced to embers, a slight chill in the air from the open balcony, does Helen release the drained woman and gently smooths away tears from flushed cheeks.
"Never blame yourself for his death your majesty, he loved you so much, and I'm sure wherever he is now, he'd want you to move on and be happy."
She looks into glistening dark eyes, a gentle smile directed at the fragile royal.
The Queen sniffs, pulling back from sturdy arms and inhales a steady breath.
"Regina."
"What?"
"My name, please..call me Regina."
Helen's smile widens, her hand grabbing the Queens and trapping Daniels ring between them.
"Regina, its a pleasure to meet you finally. Daniel told me a lot about you."
Regina chuckles softly, her smile lighting the room where dying embers cannot reach..
