Chapter 21

"Do you really think that?" she asked with a smile, enjoying the loving look in his eyes.

"What?"

"That I belong here..."

"I have no doubt about that," he answered wholeheartedly and leant closer to kiss her. Feeling him, tasting him was something she could never get enough of...

"Are you cold?" he pulled away a little.

"..."

"Just because your hand is ice cold."

"Oh... just a little bit." she said, trying to understate it. "It's not a big deal, really."

"Because I can bring something out for you or we can go inside as well, no problem." remarked Joseph kindly.

"Well, then I think we should go inside... it was a long day after all."

"Okay," he smiled and pulled her up from the bench. As they walked hand in hand towards the house, they were both deep in thought. Joseph was wondering on what would she want during her stay, sleeping together or apart, after all it was a question they haven't talked before... while Clarisse was in a smaller kind of panic, thinking on sleeping together for a whole month will have consequences and she didn't want to hurt him. So when they reached the top of the stairs they just stood there in silence, looking at each other a bit puzzled.

"Well, as I see both of us have something in our minds what we should talk about," she started,

"Yes, you're absolutely right." he smiled relieved. "We should really talk about something..."

"But if it's not a problem, maybe not tonight." she cut in quickly. "It was a long and tiring day for both of us, so I think we should continue this tomorrow."

"Well, okay... if you want." answered Joseph unsure.

"Then good night," she whispered, giving him a quick kiss and disappeared in the guest room, closing the door in front of him...

Joseph just stood there for a few moments, trying to process that one way or another he got her answer... she wants to sleep separately. It was a thing he wanted to offer her, but he still felt disappointed, because being close to her in every sense of the word was something he was really yearning for.

Meanwhile in her room Clarisse just paced up and down as she realized that if they spend a whole month together like a little honeymoon, Joseph will surely get used to it and when they have to go back it will be a misery for him. She wanted to protect him no matter what, because remembering the sadness on his face in the woods still broke her heart... But actually that was just a part of the problem, because at home the fight will surely start again with Rupert, and they will kill each other sooner or later...

So this whole thing was a mess and she didn't know what to do, but she also realized that she can't leave Joseph in uncertainty, so after she pulled herself together a bit, she went over to his room and slowly opened his door...

"It's just me, can I come in?" she asked softly.

"But of course," he looked up happily and motioned her to sit down. "Look, I'm sorry Clarisse." he started. "But I didn't want to offend you in any way, really."

"What?..." she whispered with unbelief as she sat down.

"I knew you need privacy and I didn't want to push you into something you don't want... I mean this vacation doesn't mean if you're here, you have to live with me in the same room."

"Oh my God Joseph... you really think that?" she was shocked. "Gosh, it's absolutely not about that... I was just scared."

"Scared?" he repeated puzzled. "...but about what?"

"I... I just suddenly realized that this month I spend here is something more than what I thought before. So what if I show you a world what never will exist again?"

"How... how you mean that?"

"I wanna be with you more than anything in the world, really... but what will happen if we get use to this honeymoon kind of thing, literally living together same room, same bed and then we have to go back?"

"Oh, I see." he smiled, finally understanding her. "Look, you always think too much Clarisse. You usually stuck in the past or you fear from the future, but you never live in the present, right?" he asked and she just nodded. "If you will overthinking everything, you won't enjoy this holiday and it will be all wasted. So just try to let things go," he said kindly. "I know it's not an easy thing, but you have to try it. This month is a time we have to cherish... no matter what will happen later."

"Yes, I think you're right," she sighed. "But you know, too many things happened in the past to forget everything just easily."

"I know believe me."

"But I will aim to do it, I promise."

"That's all you need, and I will do everything I can to make it easier for you."

"Thanks, really." she nodded happily and looked down to her tiny hand in his, what made her smile instinctively. "Then what would you say for a... I don't know, maybe for a... 'welcome night'?"

"A 'welcome night'? What an idea! Let me see..." he pretended he was deep in thought, then with a quick movement - what made her chuckling - he laid her down on the bed, whispering "I think we definitely should try it..." and leant closer as she drew him into a sweet kiss...

OOOOOOOOOO

Next morning, she woke up with a smile on her face to the smooth sound of the shower... as she stretched out eyes closed, she felt totally relaxed because thanks to last night, no tension remained in her body... as she slowly looked around, it made her realize that she was still in Joseph's room and the cardboard boxes everywhere left no doubt why he didn't want to let her in when they arrived. Looking closer, a photo was peeking out from one of the boxes, so she climbed out of bed and soon she could see the whole box was full of pictures and baby stuff...

"You have already woken up?" smiled Joseph unsuspectingly, coming out from the bathroom in a towel around his waist. "Clarisse?... Is everything okay?" he asked, seeing she finally turning around with astonishment on her face and a photo in her hand,

"...You have a child?!"

To be continued...