The first few items on the itinerary went quite well. We met Ignis - he was exactly like Kendryek, but visibly angrier and considerably less shimmer-y. We settled into The Forest house. I comforted Kendryek after he came back from visiting with his father and spoke with Rosalind in the room.

She was originally the daughter of the illegitimate son of High Lord Nocturne (something that allegedly happened quite frequently) and enjoyed a cushy life in one of the safer areas of the Night Court, until there were some "internal struggles" and she left for the Autumn Court a hundred or so years ago, but only started working under Kendryek forty years ago. She did not state what she did during that in between period, but I was beginning to form a theory.

"Do you have a suitor?" I asked her when the conversation dried up. Her head snapped up and she stood from her seat.

"Sort of…" She moved to the window and opened up the blinds. "It's complicated and I'm not really supposed to talk about it at the moment." I furrowed my brow.

"What do you mean?" Immediately, I thought about Kendryek and the court. Rosalind was certainly one of the less important links, but essential nonetheless.

She paled and moved into the bathroom, where she opened the next window. "It is nothing to worry about. There is a man, we are wondering if we should be together. But, it is not that simple," she explained as she came back to sit down at the table. "Nothing serious will change with my position in the court, in case you are wondering. I will be here long into the foreseeable future, do not worry," she said. I guessed she was speaking about the fae she had met in the forest, but I had no way of knowing for sure.

"How long until Aurelius comes?" I asked, I could not see the clock from where I was sitting.

"Fifteen minutes," she said, her voice cracking. She cleared her throat and placed her hands underneath her legs to prevent herself from fidgeting. Her eyes darted around the room, looking at the shadows. She took a deep breath. "I want you to know, I have a lot of respect for half-faes." I cocked my head. "It is easy being a High Fae. Everyone looks up to me, respects me.

"Tomorrow, things may be challenging for you. Many will question you as Kendryek's choice of partner, show them that you are worthy." Her comments caught me off guard.

"Thank you. I will do my best."

I took a deep breath and prepared myself. I straighted my spine and brought my shoulders back. I rested my face evenly, somewhere between a smile and a scowl. Calm, polite, quiet, and unimportant. I could be those things.

Meeting Ignis had been a process, but meeting with Aurelius had more weight, more importance. You could feel it in the room. The lights felt dimmer, the room darker. Both Rosalind and Lysander had fallen into an eerie calmness, neither of them displaying any emotion.

Kendryek had puffed up his aura considerably. It was possible to feel the heat pouring off of his skin anywhere in the room and flames constantly danced through his hair. Each beat of his heart brought with it a wave of power. The room was stifling.

I could feel my heart beginning to beat faster and faster by the minute. He was late, by five minutes. I knew little to nothing about him, but the shift in attitude in the room told me everything I needed to know.

Then, it happened.

Sssp Sssp Sssp

The sound of three winnows. Aurelius and his plus twos had arrived.

It was hard to find the words to describe Aurelius. He was no taller than Kendryek, but far more imposing. His red hair and russet eyes contained darkness. He wore a light red gambeson with a baldric full of black knives - just like the ones around Lysander's waist.

"Hello brother," he said with a rich, powerful voice. Something about him felt off. Wrong. He did not shimmer, but neither did Lysander - and Lysander's presence did not make my skin crawl.

"You came armed," Kendryek said. Ignis stood behind him, silent.

"Why would I come any differently, in this home?" Aurelius replied. He held his arms wide and smiled, showing teeth that were slightly grey. "No matter how many knives I carry, I am always open to a hug from my little bro." Kendryek bowed his head.

"Apologies, but I must pass." Aurelius frowned. He greeted Ignis and introduced the fae beside him to the rest of us. They were two black-haired High Fae males. They had piercing eyes that stared straight into my mind and faces that seemed to have never smiled. I did not feel good about them either.

Ignis introduced both of his fae right after, then Kendryek followed.

"To my right is Rosalind, I believe you know her quite well…" Kendryek said. There was a brief moment of uncomfortable silence as she lowered her chin. "Behind her is Lysander." Lysander bowed so deeply I wondered how he managed to stay upright.

"It has been a long time since I have visited your home, Lord Aurelius. I wish to be invited back sometime in the future," he said with a voice as soft as silk. Aurelius narrowed his eyes, yet stayed silent.

"And to my left is Allyn." Aurelius glanced down at Kendryek's gold band, then mine.

"An interesting choice, brother," Aurelius said. "You are taking a great risk in defending her against the Spring Court. I, personally, would not have bothered." I clamped my mouth shut. It's not worth arguing with him. It won't get me anywhere, I told myself.

"It is a risk that I am willing to take."

"Hmm, well, I hope that defending this half-fae," he spit out the words. My temper flared, but I kept it cool. "Goes better than the last time." Aurelius through a glance at Lysander, who smiled back lazily at him. He raised his nose and looked around at all of us. "I believe then, that this concludes the greetings. I will see all of you in the Great Hall in a few hours, then?"

"We will meet you there," Kendryek said, his eyes hard as stone.

"Then goodbye," Aurelius said, turning on his heel and walking away. The two fae he brought along followed him silently.

Sssp

They were gone, having vanished into a faint black mist.

"Goodbye," Ignis said, winnowing away.

Kendryek stood, unmoving, staring at the place where Aurelius had just been standing. He cocked his head, angling his right ear towards the ceiling away from us.

"I believe I'm dismissed?" Lysander asked.

"Shh," Kendryek snapped. His eyebrows narrowed into a sharp scowl. Fire leapt from his hair and onto his shoulders. Lysander pressed his lips together tightly. No one said anything.

Sssp

Kendryek vanished into a puff of hot flame.

Lysander sighed deeply, waving his hand and pulling out his belt of knives. He fastened it around his waist, said "sometimes I really wonder if this is all worth it, or if I should become a hermit and live out the rest of my days in peace," and took off running down the hallway.

I started after him, but Rosalind grabbed my hand. I twisted it out of her grip, shoving her arm away exactly how Lysander had taught me. She recoiled and gave me enough time to run.

"Stop!" she called after me. "Don't get caught up in this. Please…" I slowed to a stop and turned around. Her eyes were wide, her face pale. She looked incredibly worried. "If they are left alone, they will be fine."

"Quercus wasn't fine when Kendryek killed him," I replied angrily. Lysander disappeared through a doorway. He was getting away.

"Aurelius and Kendryek have been arguing since they were old enough to speak. They will be fine, I promise. Please, just wait it out with me." I looked at her, then back down the hallway. It was a maze, there was no way I could possibly track them down now.

But, there was one more thing left that I could try.

"Fine, I'll follow you."

When we got back to the room, I wasted no time.

"I'm going to try and meditate for a bit, something Erin taught me to help me get control of my magic," I told Rosalind as she shut and locked the door to our wing of The Forest House. She nodded and walked to her room.

"I'll leave you alone, then." She shut the door and left me. I half-ran to my bed - forgetting to close the door behind me - and laid down, closing my eyes and beginning to concentrate.

I slipped into Lysander's mind effortlessly.

I was standing, no, floating in the room where Folius stayed. It was dark, so dark that I could not see the paintings on the walls. The only light came from a faint fire located in the hearth. He was asleep on the bed, surrounded by dust. Aurelius and Kendryek stood in the far corner, near the fire, arguing with hushed voices.

"Why would I want him dead, Kendryek? He swore you in as his successor. When he dies, everything I've ever known or cared about becomes yours," Aurelius spat.

"So then why did you come here? To threaten him into abandoning that bond? To beg and beg to give 'your dear eldest son' some of it?" Kendryek snapped back, using a mocking tone.

"I don't understand what he sees in you. I don't understand it at all. If he were to die tomorrow this place would fall to you and the Autumn Court's darkest hour would begin. You've done a piss-poor job at managing your own quarter so far - third, after you murdered Quercus in your rage." Kendryek grit his teeth.

"We are prospering, Aurelius. That is more than I can say for you. All of these deals that you are making with the Night Court are getting you nowhere, you're only getting more and more tied up in their petty squabbles. There is something to be said for being peaceful." A muscle feathered in Aurelius' square jaw.

"Bull. Shit." He jabbed his finger into Kendryek's chest. "Everything you have nearly collapsed three decades ago when you got angry at Lysander, yet you keep that dull-eared piece of shit around?" Kendryek snarled. Aurelius continued, "And now look! You are letting more of them into your court. And back into your bed!"

Then, the strangest thing happened. I tightened Lysander's grip on his knife and felt Lysander's skin break. I had made him cut himself.

"Not only that, but you are going to go to war with Gaius' son over one? Do you have any idea what they did? Or did daddy never tell you?" Aurelius demanded. Kendryek knocked his arm away.

"Allyn is pure, she has done nothing to bring harm to any of us. Lysander is under my complete control and he is an invaluable asset. He has powers that put both of your little Night Court Daemati to shame," Kendryek raised his voice to meet Aurelius'.

"And yet you keep the majority of him locked up in the basement. You are afraid of him, Kendryek. How can you lead an entire court when you can barely keep your inner circle in line?" Aurelius pointed his opposite finger accusingly at Kendryek's chest.

"Shut up," Kendryek hissed, grabbing Aurelius' wrist and pulling, punching at Aurelius' diaphragm. Aurelius caught Kendryek's fist without breaking eye contact.

"No, it's worse, isn't hit?" Aurelius tightened his grip on Kendryek's hand rolling the knuckles back and forth. Kendryek did not let any pain show. Aurelius grinned and leaned in. "I knew it. It is worse, far worse. You still-"

"Allyn? Allyn!" Rosalind was shaking me out of it. I snapped back to my body, infuriated.

"What?" I half-shouted. I was shaking with rage, partially from being woken at the wrong moment, partially from the intensity of the argument.

Rosalind shrunk back like a flower in a late frost. "I found you in here, collapsed on the bed like you had died. I was worried for you," she said. Her eyes were watery with panic. All of my rage vanished instantaneously. It was replaced with a deep regret.

"I do not know what happened, but I feel fine. I am sorry for snapping at you," I said, my voice humming. Rosalind's face went blank, her eyes unfocused.

"That's worrying. I should tell Kendryek," she said, her voice unnaturally flat.

"Relax, This did not happen. Do not mention it to anyone." She nodded slowly.

"This did not happen."

"Go back to the other room. Shut the door on your way out," I commanded. She did exactly as I said.

When the door shut behind her, I ran into the attached bathroom.

"Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit," I whispered to myself. What just happened? What did I just do?

My hands shook uncontrollably and I grabbed the countertop to stop them. I took a deep breath and counted to ten. When I was finished, I looked up at myself in the mirror.

I did not entirely recognize myself.

I had gained a bit of weight, but nothing to substantial - Hadrian's training had made sure of that. My hair had darkened, going from a snowy white to a light gray. The makeup I wore accentuated the lines of my jaw and cheekbones, aging my looks. My wide eyes were dark, deep, and filled with lies.

I blinked. When I opened my eyes, I saw Kalista staring back at me.

I shook my head and spun around, facing away from the mirror. I took another deep breath.

I'm losing it, I thought to myself. Completely losing it.

I tried more breathing exercises.

After my tenth time counting to ten, I was feeling relatively calm.

That respite did not last long.

"Hello Rosalind, is Allyn in that room?" I could hear Lysander's voice through the two walls.

"Yes, I just had a lovely talk with her." Rosalind spoke back, sounding airy. Lysander knocked loudly on the door to my room. I quickly moved to the bathroom door and hit the lock. The latch in the other room clicked.

"Allyn?" He sounded angry. I did not reply. He knocked on the bathroom door. I sucked in air through my teeth. There's no point in hiding.

I unlocked the door and braced myself.

"Can you explain to me what this is?" he said, talking to me like I was a child needing discipline. Maybe I was. He pointed to the cut on his palm. I couldn't feign incompetence here. He knew.

"I was eavesdropping on you, but I don't know how that happened," I truthfully replied.

"You know not to do that." His jaw formed a hard line, his eyes were hard as stone.

"You can't run off after Kendryek and Aurelius like that without me getting worried!" I said. "I needed to know if you would be safe." He continued to stare at me.

"I appreciate your worry, but I do not want you spying on me. Ever." He reached for the belt of knives around his waist. I tensed, fearing what he would do. That was a mistake. He took off the belt and waved his hands, the knives disappearing as easily as they had appeared. "You don't trust me," he said. The anger vanished from his face for a moment. What replaced it was far worse.

"It's not that I don't trust you…" I kept the hum out of my voice this time. I was already in damage control - I could not take that risk.

"Then maybe it is a problem with respect," he said angrily. There he was again, treating me like a child. "From the moment we met, I respected your boundaries. Is it too much to ask for the same?"

"No, but…" He stood a little straighter.

"But what, Allyn?" He was daring me to say what I had on my mind.

"I don't have powers like you, Lysander. You could be going through my mind right now and I wouldn't know." He is not a fae. He is not a fae. He is not a fae.

"I would never do that, not to you." "You don't trust me, not even a little bit." I could hear his thought, clear as day, in my head. The situation was rapidly getting worse. "There are certain secrets, pieces of information, that I do not want anyone else to know. I have my secrets, you have yours. Leave it that way." The tone of his voice hurt me. He spoke to me like I was a stranger.

"I don't have any secrets, Lysander. You know everything about me, likely more than I know about myself," I replied. My eyes grew damp.

"I don't know everything about you. This has made that clear." I felt a stabbing pain in my chest and a pit form in my stomach. "There are some things that are best left in the past. Bringing them up would cause far more harm than good. What do you know?" he asked. I was the subject of an interrogation now.

"The only times I have done it was on Autumn's Eve and the night we kicked out Damien," I said. Blood dripped off his hand and onto the floor. "I'm sorry," I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around him, pulling him into a hug. A few tears fell down my cheek. A light blue glow wrapped around us. When it faded, his hand was healed.

"So you know what happened to Vivianne?" he asked. I nodded painfully.

"Please don't tell her." He stared. "I'm so sorry."

"I won't tell her. The shame of her learning more than one other fae knows, it would be too much for her." He abruptly turned and left the bathroom.

I stood, frozen. A few more tears fell down my cheek.

I may have just lost my best friend, and it was all my fault.

Sadness overwhelmed me. The void in me ached, worse than it had since I'd entered Prythian. I wanted to curl up into a ball and ignore the world, just like I had when I learned of my heritage. But I couldn't.

I dried my tears my tears with a tissue and washed my face. This was not the time to feel sorry for myself. Dinner would be in only a few hours. I would need to be there and I would need to be looking my best, even if I did not feel it.