Chapter 20
Foggy and Karen were sitting on Matt's couch in quiet conversation while he sat in a chair in his bedroom. He had put the urn on his bed, propped up between the two pillows. While he wasn't sure how it would work, he knew from experience and by her own story that she would resurrect somewhere near the ashes. He hoped that it would be on the bed and not underneath it. That might be a bit disconcerting for her.
He checked his watch, 7:49. Sunset was supposed to be 7:55 today. Only six more minutes to wait. By now he had gotten over his anger with her. She had taken a big risk, but she had also saved those women. He can't say he wouldn't have done the same if it had been him. After all, he took risks all the time. Risks that paid off sometime and at other times left him with new scars.
He felt the change in the air as an uncomfortable prickle on his skin that caused his hairs to stand on end. Then she was just there. At first, she wasn't breathing, and her heart wasn't beating, she was the same temperature as the air around them. Then her heart thudded, and she gasped. She sat straight up in the bed and gave a strangled scream. Matt reached over to grab her, but she fought him frantically, screaming again. Matt gave up and sat back for to wait for her to come out of it.
Karen and Foggy rushed in and stood by Mat as Nyah's body arched in an alarming bow, and another agonized scream was torn from her. Then she collapsed limply on the bed and just lay there panting for a moment. Matt waiting while her racing heart and breathing slowed and awareness returned. Karen left to go to the bathroom and returned with a damp washcloth. She sat on the edge of the bed and gently wiped the other woman's face with the cool cloth. A tear gathered in the corner of Nyah's eye and trickled down the side of her face.
"Was it bad?" Karen asked her softly.
She swallowed and nodded slightly, then sat up and leaned her head against Karen's shoulder. The blonde looked at Foggy and motioned towards the bedroom door.
He tapped Matt on the arm, "Let's give them a bit."
Matt reluctantly rose and followed Foggy out of the room despite the fact that he wanted to just gather her up in his arms and hold her. To tell her it would be okay. That he was here for her. Instead he left Karen to do comfort her.
A long while later, Karen joined them. "She'll be out in a moment. Try not to startle her, she's still a little shaky and not in a really good place right now. Oh, I gave her one of your T-shirts and a pair of boxers so she could get out of those clothes."
"Did she say what happened?" Foggy asked, scooting over on the couch to make room for her.
Karen shook her head, "No, but whatever happened, it was bad. Really bad."
Foggy was going to say something else, but the bedroom door opened and Nyah stepped out of the room. She looked at the three friends and gave them a hesitant little smile.
"Hi."
Matt's mouth went dry and his tongue seemed to quit working. She was wearing one of his Columbia T-shirts and a black pair of his boxers. Her hair was a tousled mess that hung loose around her shoulders and down her back. She was modestly covered, but she looked incredibly sexy wearing his clothes.
"Welcome back," Foggy said. "Do you need something? Water? Beer? Something stronger?"
She smiled a little more at him, "I don't think Matt has anything stronger. I'll have a water, anyway. Thanks."
Matt got up and gave her the chair he was sitting in. "How are you doing?"
"I'll be okay in a little while," she answered.
Foggy brought her a glass of water and she took several drinks from it. Her hand was still shaking, and she had difficulty setting it down. Matt took it from her before she dropped it.
"Do you want to talk about what happened now, or do you need to rest?" Karen asked her, concerned.
"No, I'm okay. Honestly. It's just taking my nerves a little more time to settle down that normal."
"Why don't we tell you what happened with us first?" Karen suggested.
Nyah smiled, gratitude shining in her eyes. "Yes, please."
Karen and Foggy took turns telling their story while she sipped her water and listened. Matt could tell she was not okay no matter how much she assured them it was so. Her hand still trembled slightly when she picked up the glass and he could sense little twitches every so often in different muscles. Her temperature had overshot normal body temperature and was hovering just over 100 degrees by his estimate, her blood pressure was high, and her heart rate was elevated. Foggy and Karen weren't picking any of it up because it was all subtle, but something was definitely wrong.
He was so focused on her and the little signs of distress she was giving off that it took him a moment to register that no one was speaking, and they were all looking at him as if he were the one with issues.
"What? I'm sorry, I missed that," he said with a sheepish smile. "I was thinking."
"We just asked if you had anything to add," Foggy said.
He had no idea; he hadn't been paying any attention to anything they were saying. He just shook his head and let the conversation roll on without him.
Nyah couldn't wait for this to be over. She just needed to lie down and sleep for the next week. Maybe the next two weeks. Her body wasn't the problem. It had settled down while she was in the bathroom splashing water on her face to keep herself from hyperventilating. No, it was all in her mind. She couldn't make the memory of that night fade. Every time she thought she had a handle on it, another image would flash through her thoughts: the sound of her teeth cracking, the feeling of her shredded fingers, the pain of her hamstring tearing. She couldn't block them out.
Not even concentrating on Karen and Foggy's story helped. She was smart enough to know she was experiencing the aftereffects of her trauma. It would take a while, but it would subside, she just needed a bit of time. She just needed to get through this and then go rest.
Not that she wasn't grateful. They had rescued the other women before they could be handed over to their buyers, although there was something off about how they pulled it off. If she had been able to focus better, maybe she could pinpoint what was wrong with their story, but it would have to wait until she was better equipped mentally.
Then it was her turn. She filled them in on events in both the warehouses and the van ride out into the wilderness. When they asked, she told them she could remember how to get there. When she got to the part about being locked up and not able to respond to the call of her curse, she glossed over it, saying it was unpleasant and just left it at that. Matt looked at her skeptically but didn't challenge her on it. Good, she wasn't prepared for prolonged arguments.
She did tell them that it took a lot out of her.
"Do you think we can continue this tomorrow?" she asked. "I really just need to rest and recover."
Karen jumped up looking distraught, "oh, God! We're sorry! We didn't think. Of course, you can go."
She rose to her feet doing her best to stay steady and not look as off balanced as she felt. "Thanks. I mean it," she said looking at all three of them. She was going to walk to the door, but Matt stopped her.
"I don't think it's a good thing for you to stay in your apartment tonight," he told her.
She just looked at him, uncomprehending.
"Won't Maroney know where to come looking for you? Surely, your disappearance hasn't gone unnoticed?"
"Wouldn't he have already come by if that was the case?" she asked.
"Do you want to take that chance?"
"I guess I could get a hotel room," she started. The thought did not appeal to her, though. She just wanted to lie down as soon as possible.
"Stay here," he told her. "Go take my bed."
She frowned, "but where will you sleep?"
He pointed to the couch. "Don't argue, just go." He turned her and gave her a light push towards his bedroom.
She honestly didn't have it in her to argue, so she did as he commanded, barely making it to the bed before her legs gave out. She sprawled across it face down and diagonally and passed out.
When she became aware again, she was in the garden on the palace grounds. The night was peaceful and cool; a gentle breeze blew through the boughs of the trees around her and crickets merrily chirped their courtship songs. Lei was standing on the other side of the small glade with his back to her, his hands clasped together behind it.
"I asked you to let me go," his voice floated to her in the fragrant air.
"You asked me for too much." Her voice trembled with emotion. "I have been through too much for you to just give you up."
"You!" His voice was like the crack of a whip and she flinched as if she had been struck. "You have been through so much for me?"
She climbed to her feet before answering. "Yes! I betrayed my family and my culture to love you. I left all that behind to find you. I was afflicted with this curse because I put you above everything else. I always put you above everything else. I loved you then and I love you still." She clenched her fists by her side and took a step towards him.
"No, you didn't do any of that for me. You fell in love with me because you wanted someone in your life that cared for you. You betrayed your family and your culture because you chose to pursue your own selfish needs over all others. You didn't care that I was a monk with sacred vows, you were determined to love me. No matter what the cost."
Lei turned around and faced her, the faint moonlight illuminated his face. Instead of the whole beautiful man she loved, the face that turned towards her was a ruin. Bruised and battered almost beyond recognition. Where his right eye once was there was now a gaping bleeding hole. She gasped in horror, stumbling back from his accusing stare.
His swollen, split lips twisted into a bitter smile. "You're desire for more than what you had brought both of us to this end."
"No! We loved each other. You were just as drawn to me as I was to you." Or was it, her treacherous mind latched on to the suggestion. Was he drawn to her? Or did he finally respond after years of her practically throwing herself at him. She had been only ten when he became her teacher, how could he have been drawn to her at that age?
Her eyes filled with tears that spilled out and ran down her face as the realization hit her. He was right. This was all her fault, her selfishness.
"How many times did I deny any feelings for you?" Lei asked her as he walked towards her.
Nyah remembered the first time she told him that she loved him. She had just turned fifteen and her father had not summoned her to wish her a good fortune on her birthday. She had eaten the special meal the palace kitchens had prepared alone. There were no gifts. No well wishes for the upcoming year. After lunch, she had met Lei for her lessons, and he had brought her a gift; a little hand-carved flute. Her heart had been so full of love that she felt she would explode if she didn't tell him. But when she did, he had gently chided her, saying that he was a monk that had taken a vow of chastity. That one day she would find her true love, she just had to be patient.
She hung her head in shame, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs as she felt his hands close around them.
"How many times did I tell you no?" Lei's hold on her shoulders tightened and she looked up at him.
"And now I'm dead and you still will not release me. You still hold me to you."
"No, Lei," she whimpered. "I loved you. I will always love you."
His clenched his fingers, digging them into her shoulders painfully. "Then let me share my death with you."
He pulled her to him and brought his bloody lips down on hers. She struggled in his grasp, but couldn't pull away as he forced all the pain he had into her.
Matt jerked awake. At first, he was confused, nothing was where it was supposed to be, but then he realized he was on the couch and not in his bed. Nyah was sleeping in his bed. He had gone into his bedroom after Karen and Foggy left and moved her, so she was in a more comfortable position and covered her with a blanket. He had sat on the edge of the bed for a while and observed her while she slept. The twitches and tremors he had witnessed earlier were no longer present and she was sleeping peaceably. The urge to lay down beside her was strong, so he forcibly made himself get up and go back to the living room.
Feeling his watch for the time confirmed that it was after midnight and he was about to lay back onto the pillow to try to go back to sleep when he heard a faint sound from his bedroom. It sounded like a whimper and was followed by another. That must have been what woke him up, he thought as he rose from the couch.
Walking quietly into his room, he saw that Nyah was twisted up in the blanket and was thrashing about on the bed. She was whimpering and moaning, her lips moving to form words, but none coming out. While Matt stood there, indecisive, she threw back her head and wailed, her hands reaching out as if to fend someone or something off.
Matt crawled onto the bed with her and reached out to grasp one of her hands as it clawed the air.
"Nyah, wake up!"
Her thrashing doubled, and now she had a target for her efforts as he tried to pull her to him. The hand he didn't have in his grasp, struck out and caught him in the shoulder. She fought him like her life depended on it.
"Nyah, it's just a dream! Wake up!" he shouted at her while shaking her, trying to wake her up.
She actually got a knee up and planted a blow to his ribs before he was able to gather her up in his arms and hug her tightly.
"No!" she screamed; her eyes wide open but not seeing him.
"Nyah, it's Matt! Please, wake up!"
She went stiff in his arms and drew in a sharp breath. Her hands stilled their pummeling of his chest and shoulders.
"Matt?" she whispered.
"Yeah, it's me. I've got you. You're safe," he told her as he rubbed her back with one of his hands in what he hoped was a comforting motion.
She looked around the room with confusion. "Where am I?"
"You're in my apartment, remember? You fell asleep here because we didn't think it was safe for you to go to yours," he said gently.
She went limp in his arms. "I was having the most horrible dream."
He smiled down at her. "I gathered that much. Want to tell me about it?"
"Lei was telling me this was all my fault. That I am the cause of all this misery," she sniffled.
Matt snorted, "well I'm sure you do have some of the blame, but there were others involved that were just as much to blame as you were."
"How can you be so sure?" she asked.
"Because that is the way life works," he answered.
"Lei said I threw myself at him until he had no choice to but to give in," she argued.
"That's bullshit," he said. "He could have chosen not to give in, but he did."
She sniffled again and laid her head against his shoulder. "I know. And I also know that the dream is just my subconscious working through all my guilt and pain. But there was a lot of truth in it."
"Oh, I'm sure there was. But it was the truth as seen through that guilt and pain." Matt stroked her hair and breathed in her scent. "There is another truth that can be seen through happiness and love. And still another one as seen through anger and grief. Whatever you are feeling when you recall your memories of Lei colors those memories. That's how our minds work. You just went through a terrible ordeal. I wouldn't trust anything your mind throws at you until you are in a better place mentally."
She sighed softly and lifted her face to look at him, bringing her lips temptingly close to his. "I suppose you are right. The dream was probably just a product of all that has happened to me over the last month."
Instead of kissing her on the lips like he wanted, he placed a kiss on her forehead. "Exactly." He disengaged himself from her and laid her back down onto the bed. "Go back to sleep now."
Nyah didn't release his hand, though. "Stay with me for a while?" she asked.
It probably wasn't a good idea, especially where his mind was right now, but he nodded and lay down next to her, pulling her small body up against his. She sighed and nestled into him as he tried to ignore how nice she felt. She had yet to shower since her resurrection, or whatever it was, so she only smelled of her natural scent, which still reminded him of sunshine.
Over the next few minutes, she slowly relaxed in his arms and her breathing slowed. Matt couldn't bring himself to leave her, in case her nightmare returned, he reasoned. In reality, he liked the way she felt and smelled, so he stayed and shortly after she fell back to sleep, he followed suit.
