Out of the Closet

The cool San Diego breeze blows through the open windows of the cop car as Stef drives through the city's streets. It was a slow day for crime in San Diego apparently. Which only made Stef more nervous as she ran out of excuses not to do what she had been putting off doing for weeks now. She had discussed this with both her therapist and Lena, and had decided that she was ready to start the process of coming out to the world.

Since Mike was her partner on the force, and the closest thing Stef had to a friend these days, she had decided that coming out to him would be the best place to start. She also had absolute confidence in the fact that he wouldn't let anyone else on the force give her any crap about it. Now, it was a matter of finding the right words and the right time.

"Turkey on wheat," Mike says as he climbs back into the cop car and hands Stef her sub sandwich. The two cops were spending their lunch hour parked outside a sub shop.

"Thank you," Stef tells him, crinkling the wrapper with her fingers.

"Are you okay?" Mike asks, through a mouthful of roast beef.

"Actually, there's something I need to tell you." Stef says, biting her bottom lip.

"Well, spit it out." Mike says, turning in the passenger seat to face Stef, sensing the seriousness of the situation.

"I'm a lesbian," Stef blurts out before she can chicken out.

"Huh?' Mike asks, brows furrowed in confusion.

"I'm a lesbian, Mike. I like women. I'm attracted to women. I'm dating a woman." Stef rambles.

"I. . . that. . . okay." Mike stammers, not quite sure how to react to such a statement. He and Stef had been partners on the force for over five years. Stef was never one to bring up personal matters at work - or at all. For her to be telling him this, it was a huge demonstration of her trust in him.

"That's all you have to say?" Stef asks, tension in her voice. Clearly his partner had been anxious to tell him about this part of her.

"I'm glad you've found someone." Mike says. "I definitely have noticed that you've been in a much better mood lately."

"Thank you," Stef says, the anxiety in her chest beginning to dissolve.

"The fact that you're getting laid now definitely makes the last few weeks make sense. I mean, your mood has been like a total one-eighty." Mike chuckles.

Emboldened by coming out to Mike earlier today, Stef heads right over to her father's apartment after work - not even bothering to change out of her uniform first. She knows that if she doesn't do it today, right now, that she'll never do it.

"This is quite the surprise," Stef's father, Frank Cooper, says as he answers the door and gestures for Stef to come in.

"I was on my way home from work and thought I would stop by," Stef tells him. "There's something I want to tell you." Stef knows that there is no point beating around the bush; if she does, she may chicken out. The two take a seat in the the two easy chairs positioned beside each other.

"Okay," Her father says with a leery tone. The blonde woman's heart is thundering against her ribs. She had never been so terrified in her entire life; not when her parents had divorced, not when she entered the police academy, and not even when she had been shot last year. She takes a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves.

"Dad, I'm gay." Stef blurts, letting out the deep breath she had just taken.

"What?" Frank asks curtly.

"I've met a woman that I love. She's helped me realize that there's nothing wrong with who I am." Stef tries to explain.

"Of course it's wrong!" Frank bellows, shooting up from his chair. "Two women can't be together like that. It's a sin!"

"Dad-"

"I thought we had fixed this. I thought I had gotten you straightened out." Stef's father doesn't even try to hide the disappointment in his voice.

"I don't need fixing," Stef's own voice is small. She's not even sure she believes the words she's just said.

"No daughter of mine will live in sin," Frank barks. Stef feels her heart shatter in her chest. Never in a million years did Stef expect this reaction from her father. Yes, she knew how religious he was. But she had always secretly hoped that he would be able to accept her - his own daughter.

"Then I guess you don't have a daughter," Stef surprises herself with the words she speaks. Without a second thought, Stef storms out the front door.

"Shhh, you're okay, baby." Lena whispers soothingly into Stef's ear as she lovingly strokes her shoulder. The two women were laying in Stef's bed. The cop had been sobbing into her pillow since returning home from her father's apartment. When Lena arrived an hour later, her heart had cracked at the sight of her girlfriend so upset. It had taken another hour for Lena to coax the story of what had happened out of the tearful woman. Lena had her arms wrapped around the shorter woman, spooning on the bed, trying her best to provide comfort.

Lena couldn't believe the way that Stef's father had reacted. How could someone reject their own child in such a way just for who they love? And to hear that Frank had tried to "fix" or "straighten out" Stef when she was younger - it filled Lena with white hot anger. Stef had been working so hard in the last year to accept herself and grow her confidence. Lena knew that this encounter would set her back; how far, she didn't know yet.

"I just-" Stef sobs, "didn't expect that reaction." Stef's breath comes in gasps as tears stream down her face.

"I know." Lena agrees. "I'm so sorry, baby."

"Why am I broken?" Stef asks through her sobs.

"Love," Lena begins before taking a moment to get Stef to roll over and face her on the bed. "You are not broken. Do you understand me? You are brave and kind and loving and caring." Lena tells her girlfriend, wiping away the tears on the blonde's cheek with her thumbs.

"I don't deserve you," Stef breathes, burying her face into Lena's neck.

"You deserve more than you will ever know." Lena tells her love, holding her tightly and soothingly stroking her back.

A/N: Thank you to everyone that has reviewed so far! It really makes my day and inspires me to write more! Some of you have mentioned the kids being in the story - and I promise that they will be eventually. But I want to take time with this story and really develop the relationship between Stef and Lena. Everything in good time!