Dear Dad,

Ok, at the end of my last letter - that was a rotten thing for me to say. I didn't mean it. I DO want parents. And I know I'm not even a teenager yet. And you guys are reacting to my age, just like any other parent would. And I probably AM acting my age, meaning that I'm being sort of dumb. But I'm so used to being treated like more than a kid. Luxa is technically younger than I am, and she's already a queen. At least, I think she is. I guess I don't know for sure. The point is that no one grounded me there just because I didn't see eye to eye with them. I argued with Vikus till I was blue in the face that I wasn't their Warrior, but he just smiled and disagreed with me and gave me something to eat. I feel really really horrible that the Underland was so awful to Mom, and I know I was the reason they were so awful. By then, they were sure I was their Warrior and they wanted to keep me there so I would fight for them and they figured that if they had Mom one way or another, they would have me too. Though by then they didn't need Mom because I already had feelings for Luxa and would have stayed just for her sake, but they didn't know that yet. I know I'm not explaining this very well. There were a lot of things going on that I didn't have any control over. Mom getting the plague was one of them. The Underland is now as much a part of her as it is me. Or you. You were there for two years. I don't know how you could stand it that long. The rats were awful to you too. Both rats and humans have treated my whole family pretty bad. Except for Ripred and Lizzie. They're great friends. The best. What Ares was to me. But I can't just forget him, no matter what Mom says. I won't. I won't forget Luxa either. This is all so messed up. She wants the old me back, but the old me disappeared the night you fell through that vent in the laundry room. It was an accident. But it happened. We can't move back time. We can only move forward. Only I feel like I'm not moving anywhere. Even if we end up in Virginia, I'll still feel this way. I feel as horrible about everybody down there as I feel about everybody up here. At the same time I feel like I'm not allowed to even remember them. Wouldn't you be angry if you weren't allowed to remember your friends?

Gregor