Chapter 20: Closure

"Lori?" Carol asked into her phone, leaning back in the driver's seat with the phone to her ear. She'd just gotten off of a short shift at work and was looking forward to picking her daughter up from school and spending the whole day with her.

"Hey. You're probably at work, aren't you?"

"Actually, no. I'm just leaving work. You have great timing. What's up?"

"Oh, thank god. Look, I know it's a lot to ask, but I was wondering if you might watch Carl until about seven this evening."

"It's not a lot to ask. I love Carl. Of course I will. Is everything ok?" Carol's brow creased in concern, and she heard Lori let out a dry laugh.

"Oh, everything's fine. I have somewhere I have to be at 3:00, and I didn't want him to sit around wondering why I was running so late. You're still on the pickup list. You're the only person I trust besides Shane or Rick to pick him up."

"That means a lot," Carol said softly, putting her hand to her chest. She blinked and swallowed back the lump that was rising in her throat. "I'll just pick up Sophia and Carl, and we'll make a day of it."

"Carol, you really are the best," Lori sighed. "Thanks, sweetie."

"Anytime. I know you'd do the same for me if I needed somebody to watch Sophia."

"I would," Lori agreed. "Thanks again, Carol."

"You're welcome. See you later." Carol ended the call and started the car. She headed off toward home to get a quick shower and a change of clothes. And when she pulled up outside of her house, she noticed Rick's patrol car sitting there. She groaned softly to herself, and she pulled up right behind him.

He was sitting on the front porch in his uniform with his hand wrapped in a white cloth. She frowned and wondered what excuse he'd come up with to see her this time.

"Hey," she said, squinting into the sunlight as she walked up the porch steps. When the house finally blocked the sun from her eyes, she saw the blood on the rag he was holding. "What happened?"

"Ah, I cut my damn hand during a traffic stop. There was a jagged piece of metal on this rust bucket of a car I pulled over, and your place was closer."

"How did you…never mind," she sighed. "Let me see." Rick took the rag off of his hand, and fresh blood came seeping from the wound. "Ouch. That's bad, Rick."

"Stitches bad?"

"No, but almost. You should've just gone to the ER."

"Well, you're better than half the nurses in there, and I remember you told me you had a short day today when I dropped Sophia off Monday."

"Right," Carol said with a nod. "Alright, come inside. Don't bleed on my floor." Rick pouted for a moment, and Carol smirked. "I had to give you a hard time. Do you remember how many nights I lay there awake wondering if you were going to get shot or worse out there?" Rick nodded solemnly as Carol unlocked the door and let him inside. "Then you'd come home with some random injury, and I always wondered if you were the clumsiest cop on the force or if you just got yourself into the strangest predicaments."

"I'm not clumsy," Rick insisted. Carol smirked and led him to the kitchen.

"Lori asked me to pick up Carl today. She's got an appointment."

"Oh, you don't mind?"

"Why would you even ask that?" Carol sighed. "He's my son. I love him. I may not have given birth to him, but he's mine all the same."

"You really are amazing. You know that?" Rick asked. Carol smiled and shook her head, grabbing for the first aid kit on top of the fridge.

"Sit," she instructed. Rick sat down at the table, and Carol pulled a chair up across from him. She began gently dabbing the cloth over his hand, and she peeked up to catch him staring at her. He grinned at her, and she rolled her eyes and continued disinfecting the wound. Once the blood was cleared away, the cut was relatively small, and Carol quickly dabbed some ointment on it before patching it up with a piece of gauze and some tape. She stuck a large bandage in his front pocket to dress it with later, and she let go of his hand. "There. All set."

"You're so good at that."

"Well, it's a good thing I'm a nurse, then." Rick grinned, and Carol sighed when he leaned forward a little. "Rick?"

"Yeah."

"Why are you here?"

"I told you," he pointed out. "My hand."

"That's not why you're here, and we both know it. You could've patched his up yourself." Rick nodded then, shrugging his shoulders.

"Just wanted to see you."

"Rick…"

"I know. I'm sorry. We're not supposed to do this." He looked down, and he sighed. "I just missed you." He looked up then, and Carol caught his gaze. And he started to lean forward, and for a moment, she could feel herself giving in. She could feel her body responding to those needs again. But she knew it was five steps back and it would do nothing but hurt them both. She also realized, in that moment as he was coming toward her, that if she let this happen, that step forward was even farther than she imagined. And it was that realization that sparked another. She wanted to move on. She felt ready. She needed to find that spark with someone new. She needed it. Craved it. And he wasn't the one she wanted this with. Not anymore. For as easy as it would be to fall back into old patterns, she knew in that moment that a few minutes of pleasure would only lead to a world of hurt in the long run. And just as Rick brushed his lips against hers, she pulled back as if she'd been burned. She shook her head.

"No?"

"No," she whispered. "We can't. I don't…" She took a deep breath and sat back in her chair to put a little space between them. "I don't want this."

"You don't want this?"

"I want…sex. Don't get me wrong," she huffed out, brushing her fingers over her lips. "I just…"

"You don't want it with me." Carol chanced a gaze into his eyes, and she shook her head.

"I'm sorry, Rick. I don't."

"It's the new guy, right?" Rick asked. Carol felt herself blushing and couldn't manage to even attempt to shake her head. Rick nodded shortly and let out a low chuckle. "This is what we needed, right? We needed to move on. Looks like you already are, even if you don't know it yet." He sat back in his seat, and he rubbed his uninjured hand over the back of his neck. "Wow. This really is over, isn't it?"

"It is," she said quietly. "I'm sorry if it's not for you. I know we can say it until we're blue in the face, but nobody's really ever over someone…until they are." It made perfect sense in that moment, just between the two of them, and Rick leaned forward then and pressed a soft kiss to Carol's cheek.

"Whatever happens with you and this guy," Rick said quietly, pulling back and reaching out to give her hand a squeeze, "I hope you'll be happy." He stood then, and he shook his head. "I'm sorry for…"

"Don't apologize," Carol said quietly. "Now we both know."

"We do," he agreed. "I still miss you."

"I know. It'll pass. You'll find somebody who makes you laugh. Before you know it, you'll be thinking about them instead of me. I hope you find that soon. I really do, Rick."

"Sounds like you're speaking from experience," Rick said with a little smile. "That's good. I'm happy for you."

"No you're not," Carol chuckled.

"Nah," Rick shrugged. "But I will be." He nodded toward the front of the house. "I should go."

"I'll walk you out." Carol followed him to the front door, and when Rick finally left and headed out to his car, she closed the door and leaned against it, closing her eyes as a weight lifted. It had happened without her even realizing. She had moved on, and while she had no way of knowing what was going to happen next, she knew that going back was not an option. Finally, she was ready. She was a little scared, but more than that, she was hopeful. She was excited. She couldn't wait to live her life with no thoughts of going back to what was familiar. The safety nets were gone, and she was about to take the plunge. Her heart was racing, her palms her sweating, but more importantly, she was smiling.

Author's Note: Thanks for reading, guys! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! As always, feedback is greatly appreciated!