Chapter 21: Tweety Bird vs. Meowth

In Granny's apartment, Tweety Bird was in his cage, singing to himself. Tweety was a yellow canary who had a somewhat large head.

I'm a tweet wittow biwd in a diwded tage;

Tweety'th my name but I don't know my age.

I don't have to wuwy and dat is dat;

I'm tafe in hewe fwom dat ol' putty tat.

Just then, Tweety noticed Meowth heading toward the apartment from the window. "I tawt I taw a putty tat," said Tweety. He looked away and saw he was gone. Minutes later, Meowth was at the window. "I did, I did taw a putty tat!" cried Tweety. Meowth showed one of his claws. "Sorry I ain't your usual putty tat. But I decided to prove that I can do a better job at catching you than Sylvester," said Meowth. He then inserted his claw, ready to unlock Tweety's cage. But before he could open it, something whacked in the head, causing him to fall down on the ground. He looked up and saw that it was Granny, Tweety's owner. She was armed with umbrella. "If you think you can eat my bird, think again!" said Granny. She began to chase away Meowth, while whacking him with her umbrella. Meowth yelped whenever he got hit in the head. "Bad ol' putty tat!" said Tweety.

After shaking Granny off, Meowth had an ice pack on his head. "I can't get to that rat with wings as long as that old hag is home. I'll have to wait until she leaves," said Meowth. Meowth watched the apartment, waiting for any sign of Granny leaving the place. She left to do some grocery shopping. "Good. She's gone. Now's my chance," said Meowth. He chuckled as he headed back into the apartment. Knowing that Granny would've locked the door, he decided to unlock the door with his claws. He unlocked the door, but when he opened it, he found himself face to face with Hector the Bulldog. Meowth laughed nervously at the sight of the large dog. Without saying a word, Hector slammed one of his fists on Meowth, squishing him flat. The flattened Meowth walked away, humiliated.

Meowth decided to take a different approach to catch Tweety. He decided to climb into a drainpipe on the side of a building. It would lead up to the room where Tweety was in. Tweety saw what Meowth was doing. In retaliation, Tweety dropped a bowling ball down the drain pipe. It rolled down the drainpipe until it collided with Meowth. Both Meowth and the bowling ball rolled out of the pipe. As it turned out, Meowth had swallowed the bowling ball. He rolled down the road and into Champin's Bowling Alley. Meowth crashed into some bowling pins in one of the lanes. It was so loud that it could heard from outside of the bowling alley.

Meowth decided to sling himself toward the window using a slingshot. Meowth chuckled. "Tweety won't see me coming," said Meowth. After pulling the slingshot back, he let go and was flung toward the window. But at that moment, Granny was closing the window, unaware what was going to happen. Meowth hit the window, face first. He then slid off. "What was dat?" asked Tweety.

A little later, Meowth snuck into the air vents and managed to get into the room. Tweety's back was turned. He decided to pose as a lamp, wearing a lampshade on his head. Tweety saw the "lamp" and stared at it. "I don't remember that lamp," said Tweety. He saw Meowth's tail. "This looks like it needs to be plugged," said Tweety. He grabbed at Meowth's tail and began to move it toward a plug outlet. Meowth paled, knowing what was going to happen. Before he could do anything, Tweety plugged Meowth's tail into the outlet. This resulted in Meowth getting shocked silly. His skeleton was showing as he was getting electrocuted by the plug outlet. "You think after getting zapped by Pikachu in over twenty seasons, I'd be used to this kind of pain by now!" cried Meowth. Meowth fell to the ground, black as soot. Hector walked up to Meowth and picked him up. He scrunched him into a ball and rolled him down the stairs and back into the streets.

Meowth decided to the best way to get to Tweety was to lure Hector away. He went to a costume shop and bought a female dog costume. He put the costume one. He chuckled. "Once I get that stupid dog's attention, I'll lure far away from here and knock him out with a mallet. With him out of commission, I'll get Tweety for sure," said Meowth. He then began to walk toward Granny's apartment.

But without warning, he was snagged by a dog catcher's net. The dog catcher than threw him into the back of his van. He began to drive away. "Hey! Let me out of here! I'm not a dog! I'm a cat! C-A-T! CAT!" cried Meowth as he removed his costume. But that was a big mistake. For in the van were other dogs. They included K-9; Marvin the Martian's pet dog, Chester & Spike, Marc Anthony, the Dopey Dog and more. "Crud," said Meowth. The dogs began to maul Meowth, with him screaming.

After being mauled by the dogs, Meowth decided to lace Hector's dog food with a sleeping drug. After Hector fell asleep, Meowth went into the room. "Uh-oh," said Tweety. Meowth chuckled. "No granny or doggy to save you this time, birdie," said Meowth. Suddenly, Tweety clonked Meowth with a mallet and began to run off. Meowth recovered and began to chase after Tweety. "Get back here, you yellow rat with wings!" cried Meowth.

Tweety then flew and went into a tree that was in the middle of an abandoned mine field. Meowth ran until he saw the warning sign about the landmines. "Uh-oh. I'm going to have to use a metal detector to get around them," said Meowth. He went to fetch one. Meowth returned with the said item and began to use it to get around the landmines. "Here putty tat. Catch!" said Tweety, tossing Meowth something. Meowth caught what Tweety threw at him. It was a large magnet. Suddenly, the magnet drew some of the landmines out of the ground and they magnetized onto the magnet. The landmines instantly exploded, leaving Meowth black as soot. Meowth began to walk away, setting off the other landmines.

Elsewhere, Jessie and James weren't having much luck either trying to get their targets. Especially since Meowth wasn't there to help them. They ordered a red ACME rocket. But they repainted it black and painted the R symbol that represented Team Rocket. James looked through his electrobinoculars and spotted Fifi, her Spritzee, Ash, Pikachu and Serena dead ahead of them. "Okay, Jessie. You can light the match," said James. "Right," said Jessie. She took out a match and lit it. The magenta-haired thief then lit the fuse. The flame went down the fuse until the rocket finally set off and Jessie and James began to rocket toward Fifi, her Spritzee, Ash, Serena and Pikachu. Fortunately for our heroes, since the rocket engine was loud, they heard it coming. "Uh-oh. Look's like Team Rocket's getting desperate," said Serena. Fifi nodded.

(Insert "Wreakin' Havoc" from Pokémon)

Ash quickly took out a Poké Ball. "Arcanine, we need you to get us away from Team Rocket, fast!" said Ash. He threw the ball and the said Pokémon was summoned. Arcanine was a quadruped, canine Pokémon with an orange pelt marked by jagged black stripes. It had diamond-shaped ears with beige insides, black eyes, a round, black nose, and two pointed teeth protruding from its upper jaw. Its head, muzzle, and chest were covered in shaggy, beige fur, except for two oval sections around each eye and ear. Long tufts of fur grew behind its elbows and around its ankles. Its underside was black, and it has a billowing, beige tail that was bent in the middle. Each paw had three toes and a round, pink pad.

Moving quickly, Ash, Serena, Pikachu, Fifi & her Spritzee jumped onto Arcanine's back. "Hang on, Fifi!" said Pikachu. Arcanine began to run real fast, carrying its six passengers. "Oh no, you don't!" said Jessie. "You're not getting away this time!" said James. It wasn't long before a wild chase ensued. Jessie and James chased Ash, Pikachu, Fifi, her Spritzee, Serena and Arcanine all over Acme Acres. They were careful not to run over anybody else. One of the residents they passed by was Wile E. Coyote. He turned to the readers and held a sign that read, "Look familiar?"

Arcanine ran until it along with Ash, Serena, Pikachu and Fifi & her Spritzee stopped in front of an abandoned explosives factory on the outskirts of Acme Acres. Even though it was abandoned, there were still explosives inside the building itself. Jessie and James' rocket was getting closer and closer. But Arcanine stood its ground. "Ahsh, we should mahve!" cried Fifi. "Not yet," said Ash. "We got you now, twerps!" said Jessie. "Your Pikachu is good as ours!" said James. Ash just sneered. "Not in your lifetime," said Ash. Suddenly, Arcanine jumped high in the air at the last minute. Jessie and James saw where they were headed and their eyes widened in horror. They tried to stop the rocket, but it was too late. They screamed as they went through the doors of the abandoned explosives factory and the madness began.

If one were to pass by the abandoned explosives factory, they would hear a series of big and small explosions from inside the factory as well as couple of screams. The explosions were also shaking the building itself. Ash, Pikachu, Serena, Fifi & her Spritzee and Arcanine were standing a good distance away from the factory. Suddenly, there was an extremely loud, and huge explosion that engulfed the factory and a good portion of the area the factory was in.

(End Music)

When the smoke and fire subsided, the explosives factory was completely gone. In fact, the factory and the ground where the factory stood was gone. In its place, was a big, smoking crater, with a fried Jessie and James in the center of it. The two dumb thieves were smoking too. Ash, Pikachu, Fifi, her Spritzee, Serena and Arcanine shook their heads. "It's sad really. We used to consider them a threat," said Ash. "But now they've been reduced to the level of annoying street punks," said Serena. "Pika," said Pikachu. "Zey should just give crime ahltahgethair. Eet's naht wahrkeeng fahr zem," said Fifi. Pinky and Violet the Spritzee and Arcanine grunted in agreement. The seven then left the area.

Back in the city, Meowth resumed chasing after Tweety. Tweety went around a corner and got an idea. He made a decoy of himself, made out of a stick of dynamite. Meowth saw the fake Tweety, thinking it was the real one. He picked up the decoy and swallowed it whole. The dynamite decoy then exploded, sending Meowth flying and screaming. Ash, Pikachu, Fifi, her Spritzee and Serena were re-entering the city when they heard Meowth's screaming. They saw him falling down. "I tawt I taw a big mouthed putty tat," said Ash mockingly. "You did, you did taw a big mouthed putty tat," said Tweety. Meowth landed on the pavement, hard. He was black as soot and the fur on the upper part of his body had been blown off due to the dynamite.

As a last resort, Meowth decided to paint himself like a skunk to scare off both Granny and Hector. He also used limburger cheese and garlic to give him the stench. Meowth chuckled. "There's no way that this plan can fail. That Fifi girl has her eye on Pikachu. No way she'll interfere since she's swooning over Pikachu," said Meowth. He began to head toward Granny's apartment. Unfortunately for him, Bimbette Skunk happened to be walking down the street, still upset about not being the girl that Pikachu was taking out tonight. She then spotted Meowth a couple of feet away from her.

(Insert "Love Theme" from Romeo & Juliet Tchaikovsky)

The instant she saw Meowth, cupid fired an arrow at Bimbette, causing her to fall in love with him. Her eyes turned into red hearts, her tail stripe turned red like a thermometer and her heart pounding out of her chest. "Yahoo! Not long after Pikachu broke my heart, a new boy has come to take his place! And he's a hundred times more cuter than Pikachu!" cried Bimbette happily. She let out a happy shriek before running toward Meowth. Meowth was just about to pick the lock to the door to the apartment when Bimbette seized him. The next thing Meowth knew, he found himself getting hugged by Bimbette Skunk. "Hello there, cutie!" said Bimbette. Meowth's eyes widened when he saw her. Oh no! I forgot about that skunkette!, thought Meowth. "I'm definitely taking you out to the dance tonight!" cried Bimbette. She gave Meowth a face full of kisses, ending it with a big kiss on the lips. Meowth's face was smeared with Bimbette's lipstick. After kissing him, she began to carry him off, singing to herself. "Help!" cried Meowth meekly.

(End Music)

Jessie and James saw everything and face palmed. They were covered in bandages and casts from their recent explosive failure. Then, the two dumb thieves started to undergo a total mental meltdown. "The last two days have been the worst days in our entire criminal careers! Ever since we got to Looney Tunes Land, we've experiencing nothing but lots of bad luck!" cried James. "Sure we've had bad luck trying to catch Pikachu in the past, but this is more bad luck than we actually deserve! All our plans have been figuratively and literally blowing up in our faces! And now, we lose Meowth to that pink skunkette!" complained James. "Is there anyway we can turn around our bad luck?!" asked Jessie. "I don't know! But all I can say is . . . I HATE THIS PLACE! I HATE IT! I HATE IT! I HATE IT!" screamed James. Jessie and James were so angry that they were ripping off part of their hair and clothes. They also stomped on the shredded pieces.

Just then, the wind blew an old newspaper into Jessie's face. She struggled to get it off her face. When she got it off, she saw the headline was an article about Perfecto Prep Academy, a school that was Acme Looniversity's biggest rival. They've been known to cheat in sporting events. This news article was mentioning about how they lost another game against Acme Looniversity. "James. I might have an idea," said Jessie.

Sylvester had seen everything and laughed. "I knew that sorry excuse for a cat would fail at catching Tweety. Now to catch him since he should be tired enough for me to snatch him easily," said Sylvester. But as he crossed the street to try to reach Tweety, a piano that was accidentally dropped by a crane fell and crushed him. "Aw, thufferin thuccotash!" said Sylvester.


I hope you got a good laugh reading about Meowth looking like a fool trying to catch Tweety. So now, he's being taken to the dance by Bimbette Skunk against his will. Meanwhile, Jessie & James having had enough of their bad luck have decided to team up with Perfecto Prep., Acme Looniversity's rival. What evil scheme will they cook up? In the meantime, next chapter, Serena decides to give Bonnie a pep talk about why she shouldn't arrange a loveless marriage for Clemont . . .