The Ultimate Detective and The Ultimate Hope Gaiden: How I Met Your Mother (And How I Met Your Father)

Bonding Arc

Chapter Five: The Ultimate Murderous Fiend Appears! Makoto Stands Up to Kyoko?

Present Day

"Alright, Kiki, ready for more storytime?"

"Yeah! I can't wait to hear more of how you bonded with Daddy and the others!"

"…Well…" Makoto began nervously "it wasn't all rainbows and unicorns, Kiki. Believe it or not, we did have our occasional arguments."

"You guys argued? With each other?"

Seeing Kiki's incredulous stare, Makoto answered "Yes, and you're about to hear the story of our first real argument. You see…it happened the Saturday after we went to Leon's baseball game. I had just finished my training with Sakura and we had gathered in the Dining Hall for lunch."

XXX

May 17, 2014

Wiping the sweat off her brow with a hand towel that Sakura had handed her, Kyoko smiled at seeing Makoto wave her over. She made her way over to sit next to Makoto at the long table with everyone else, while Sakura sat next to Hina.

"So, how's your training with Sakura been going?"

"It's exhausting, but I feel a remarkable improvement with each session. I can see how Sakura obtained her title of Ultimate Martial Artist."

Nodding, Sakura remarked "She becomes tougher to pin down with each spar we have. In truth, if she decided to dedicate herself completely to the path of becoming the Strongest Human Alive, she might even surpass me someday."

Nodding at the praise, Kyoko replied "Thank you, but I have no interest in dedicating my life to improving my physical strength; only enough to ensure that I don't meet an untimely demise anytime soon."

Nodding, Sakura took the plate in front of her and started grabbing her lunch, Makoto, Kyoko, and Hina following suit. Makoto started to reach for some rice from the bowl in the center, only for another hand to touch his. Looking up, he saw Sayaka, who looked just as surprised as he did.

Withdrawing her hand, she said sheepishly "Oh, sorry, Makoto. You go ahead."

Makoto smiled sweetly and took a spoonful of rice, only to dump it on her plate before scooping his own.

"Makoto! You didn't have to do that, really! I…"

"I did it because I wanted to be nice to my friend, Sayaka." Smiling warmly at Sayaka who was now staring at him incredulously, he assured her "I'm not upset anymore, Sayaka, and I was never upset at you. So please…don't keep kicking yourself about this. It's all water under the bridge as far as I'm concerned, so please stop feeling like you have to avoid me. Please, Sayaka?"

Her incredulous blue eyes started to soften at his words, her frown twitching into a smile as she nodded and whispered "Okay, Makoto."

Everyone except for Byakuya, Toko, Mukuro, and Junko smiled at the scene, touched by the resolution of the messy love triangle that had temporarily divided their class.

The silence was eventually interrupted by Toko, who scoffed "Ugh…I h…hate romantic comedies like this."

Before Makoto or Sayaka could think to object, Hina scowled, slamming her hands on the table and demanding "What's your deal, Fukawa? You just ruined the mood!"

"O…of course you would defend them, you i…idiot swimmer girl…"

"IDIOT SWIMMER GIRL?"

Sakura glared as they watched Toko and Hina go back and forth, Kyoko pinching her nose as she grew weary of their pointless feud.

Leaning into Kyoko's ear, Makoto whispered "Yeah, Toko's…not the easiest person to get along with. Even I can only tolerate small conversations with her. She always seems to think that everyone's out to get her, so she becomes skeptical of anyone who genuinely tries to be her friend."

Kyoko nodded in comprehension, thinking …Maybe it's best if I avoid Fukawa-san, if only to spare myself an unnecessary headache.

The two continued to watch as Toko continued to rile up Hina, making her blush red with embarrassment as she scowled in anger.

"Fukawa, I'm warning you…don't…OOPS!"

Time froze as Hina accidentally knocked over a nearby pepper shaker, sending a small cloud of pepper in Toko's direction.

Toko's nose twitched as she covered her face with her hands, trying to withhold her sneeze as her eyes widened in fear before narrowing them in a glare at Hina.

"You…i…idiot bi…bimbo! Look what you've done!"

"Sorry! I didn't mean it, Fukawa-san, really!"

"Toko, are you okay? Do you want me to get you a tissue?"

Kyoko felt a sensation of dread tingle down her spine as Toko refused "No you nit…nitwit! Get…out of here be…before…"

Eventually she couldn't hold back any longer; Toko sneezed and hung her head, only to giggle before progressing into a cackle, everyone else visible creeped out at her demeanor.

"T…Toko?" Makoto ventured, getting up as he asked "Are…are you okay, Toko?"

"Toko? Please, Toko's such a loser name!"

When Toko lifted her head, everyone leapt from their seats and stepped back in fear. Her eyes turned to a fiery crimson, and her tongue had elongated, slithering like a serpent. Her eyes settling on Makoto, who gulped at this new Toko, she flipped forward onto the table, making Makoto stumble backwards.

A creepy grin on her face, Toko asked "Hey, you're kinda cute. Who are you, squirt?" Tapping her chin as Makoto shook with fear, her eyes widened with realization as she exclaimed "Oh, that's right! You're Mahkyutie!"

Mahkyutie…is she talking about…me?

Makoto's look of fear merely intensified as Toko withdrew a pair of razor-sharp scissors from under her leg, proclaiming "Congratulations, Mahkyutie! You're officially cute enough to die at the hands of the Ultimate Murderous Fiend, Genocide Jack! Or better yet, let's go with Genocide Jill!"

Genocide Jack! Toko…is GENOCIDE JACK?

…Of course, it makes perfect sense. Kyoko realized A split personality, a high school student…Genocide Jack was lying right under our very noses!

She didn't have any time to ponder further, as Jill prepared to lunge, screaming "DIE, MAHKYUTIE!"

"MAKOTO!"

Makoto screamed in terror, closing his eyes as he prepared for the inevitable, thinking …Well, it was a short life…

Only the end never came; in the blink of an eye, Kyoko had tackled Jill to the ground, wrestling the scissors out of her hands before reaching into her jacket and withdrawing a pair of handcuffs, restraining Jill to the leg of the table.

"Ah, pooey! My first failure!"

Everyone else breathed out a sigh of relief, though none as big as Makoto, who looked at Kyoko gratefully, thinking Kyoko, I owe you my life!

Withdrawing her cell phone from her pocket, Kyoko threatened "I'm calling the police to collect you; you're going to spend the rest of your life in a cell, Genocide Jack!"

"Wait, NO!"

Everyone gaped, turning to see the unlikely source of the objection: Makoto Naegi himself. Everyoone stared at him with disbelief, unwilling to believe that the boy was actually defending the one who tried to off him.

Makoto Naegi…have you lost your mind? Seeing Makoto's surprisingly determined eyes, she sighed and acquiesced "Let's go into the kitchen; we need to talk." Turning to the rest of the class, Kyoko asked "Sakura, could you make sure she doesn't escape."

Nodding, Sakura moved directly in front of Jill, warning her "Be warned, cretin, if you try to escape…" Her eyes blazed with fury as she roared "THERE WILL BE NO FORGIVENESS FOR YOU!"

Satisfied, she ordered "Makoto…Kitchen…Now."

Gulping, Makoto nodded, following Kyoko into the kitchen. Once the door was closed, Kyoko sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose as she turned around, staring at him with an exasperated look on her face.

"What are you thinking? Did your ears completely shut off when Genocide Jack revealed herself? Do you even know who Genocide Jack is?"

How could I not? It's all over the internet! Looking at his feet, Makoto summarized "A monstrous villain who's murdered scores of victims in a brutally bizarre fashion…The word bloodlust was left at each murder scene, written in the victim's own blood. They strike without warning, and disappear without a trace. Yeah, I know who Genocide Jack is."

Nodding, Kyoko asked "Then answer me this. What possible rationale could you have for wanting to defend that monster?"

Taking a deep breath, Makoto conceded "I know…that Genocide Jack has done a lot of te4rrible things…many, many worse deeds than Shutaro Fukuka ever did. Believe me, Jack deserves to be locked away where she can't hurt anyone ever again. But…Kyoko…" Makoto looked up at her, a steely determination in his normally warm eyes and an angry scowl on his face as he protested.

"But Toko didn't do those things! I know Toko, and she wouldn't go and kill somebody. We can't hold her responsible for what Genocide Jack did! It's not right, and you know it!"

Kyoko sighed, averting her eyes; the pure hearted passion that he displayed against Shutaro that caused her to admire him was now becoming a thorn in her side…a thorn that she didn't know how to prune.

"…Then what do you propose we do? The fact remains that Genocide Jack is still in this school, unrestrained might I add. As long as Toko is free, then so is Genocide Jack. I don't like it either, but one can't be restrained without the other."

"There's gotta be a way to keep Jack dormant, though; a way to stop them from killing again! All we have to do is find it. Please, Kyoko, just give me some time to figure something out! Maybe we can convince Jack to give up killing!"

…You intend to reason with a serial killer? One that just tried to off you? Makoto Naegi, that is the craziest plan I've ever heard. …then again…a lot has happened that I would have deemed impossible. So it just might be crazy enough to work.

Seeing Makoto's pleading, puppy dog eyes, she caved and gave him what he wanted.

"…Official policy requires me to report any leads within twenty-four hours. If you can figure out a way to restrain Genocide Jack without harming Fukawa-san by noon tomorrow…I'll pretend this incident never happened."

Beaming, Kyoko bowed and almost cried "Tahank you, Kyoko! I promise, I'll figure out something. I just need to…"

"WHAT THE HELL?!"

Gasping, Makoto and Kyoko dashed out of the kitchen, only for Makoto's mouth to gape open in shock while Kyoko's eyes widened at the sight before them. Jill was using her uncuffed arm to hug against Byakuya's leg, nuzzling her face against his pants as her eyes closed in an attempt to appear cute.

Byakuya tried to pry his leg free of Jills grasp in vain as he yelled "Get the hell off of me, you wench!"

"No way, Master! You're totally cute! In fact, you're too cute to kill! Plus, Miss Debbie Downer likes you, so there's no way I can kill you! I'll do anything so long as I can keep being near you, Byakuya!"

A light bulb went off in Makoto's head as he walked up, to the surprise of Kyoko as he reasoned "Hey, uh Jill? I've got a deal for you; if you promise to never kill anyone ever again, then we won't turn you in and you can hang out with Togami-kun all you want."

Blanching, Byakuya shook his head and protested "No way! I re…"

"You've got a deal, Big Mac!"

…Well that was easy…Kyoko deadpanned as she looked at Makoto, who was now looking at her expectantly. Sighing, she reasoned Well, a deal's a deal… before walking up and taking a key from her jacket, unlocking Jill's cuffs.

Rubbing her wrists with her hands, Jill exclaimed "Thanks a lot, Nancy Drew! Now…come here, cutie!"

Stepping backwards in fear, Byakuya eventually hightailed it out of there, yelling "You'll pay for this, Naegi!"

"Ohh, Master! You don't have to play hard to get!"

Everyone watched as the former serial killer chased after the unlucky object of her affections, sweatdropping as they collectively asked themselves What just happened?

XXX

Kyoko sat in her nightgown, fiddling with a strand of her hair as she reflected on the day's events…and on her first actual confrontation with Makoto.

I knew he possessed such courage…he wouldn't have been able to expose Shutaro otherwise. But…I somehow didn't anticipate that I'd have to confront it…or that I'd cave to it. Makoto Naegi…

Her thoughts were interrupted by the ring of her doorbell. Curious, she got up and cautiously opened the door, her eyebrows raised in surprise as Toko stood meekly in front of her, a neutral frown on her face.

She must have switched with Genocide Jack…Kyoko deduced as an awkward silence passed between the two.

"Look…I…I know you pro…probably don't want to se…see me right now. But I…I need to ask…ask you something."

Taking a second to mull over Toko's request, Kyoko sighed, opening the door fully as she turned around and walked to her bed, ordering "Enter" before sitting down on it, the Ultimate Writing Prodigy obeying the command when she quietly walked inside, stopping a few feet away from Kyoko.

"…Well, out with it. You said you had something to ask me?"

"D…don't r…rush me! Th…this is hard enough as it is!"

Nodding, Kyoko replied "My apologies. Continue."

Taking a deep breath, Toko asked "Why? Wh…why didn't you tu…turn me in? You're a de…detective, right? So why didn't you tu…turn me in? You know…for all the bo…boys that Ge…Genocide Ja…Jack has killed?"

…Because Makoto begged me not to. Even Kyoko felt that line of reasoning was too cruel to tell Toko, regardless of how true it was. Instead, she decided to go with Makoto's line of logic, informing her "You're not Genocide Jack, and Genocide Jack isn't you. To have you arrested for her crimes…would be a miscarriage of justice. Besides, you were there when we neutralized the further danger from Genocide Jack."

"…Actually…we don't sh…share memories. Only basic information and fe…feelings."

…That's new. I wonder what else we don't know about Genocide Jack… "Ah. In that case, I'll fill you in. After your initial switch, Makoto made a deal with your Alter Ego. He promised that she could spend time with Togami-kun any time she wanted if she promised to never kill anyone ever again."

Staring at the Ultimate Detective in shock, Toko processed "So…I can be with Master…and never kill anyone ever again?" A stream of drool streamed from her lips, the Ultimate Writing Prodigy struck with a lovesick expression as she embraced herself, moaning "This is…a dream…a dream come true! You…you've made me…so …happy! How…how can I ever re…repay you?"

Kyoko was about to decline her offer, until she realized Wait…this could be the perfect opportunity to learn more about her…besides, I can't imagine another opportunity coming by where we would actually talk to each other. Nodding, Kyoko accepted "Very well. In that case, I'd like to learn more about your other half. Tell me everything you know about Genocide Jack."

XXX

Kyoko closed the door behind Toko, sighing in relief before walking back to her bed collapsing onto the mattress as she stared at the ceiling.

*Phew* "That was exhausting. I had no idea that Toko's childhood was so traumatic…or that it would have so many parallels to mine."

To accommodate Kyoko's request to know everything there was to know about Genocide Jack, it had become necessary to learn about Toko's childhood, including her parental issues, distrust of others, and betrayal by loved ones, all of which Kyoko identified with.

"Getting to know Toko…it was like looking at my reflection in a funhouse mirror."

"She always seems to think that everyone's out to get her, so she becomes skeptical of anyone who genuinely tries to be her friend."

"Heh, yeah, we're not so different after all…" Kyoko mused, reflecting on Makoto's earlier description of Toko. "I don't know if I can necessarily call Toko a friend yet…but we're similar enough that it's possible. Maybe…I should take a page from Makoto's book…maybe I should try…bonding with Toko…"

XXX

Present Day

"And that's how your Aunt Toko and I became friends, Kiki."

"Wow, Mommy. I can't believe that she wasn't in love with Uncle Hiro back then…or that Aunt Jill tried to hurt Daddy."

Smiling at his daughter, Makoto explained "A lot's changed since we first went to school together, Kiki. Remember, I used to have a crush on Sayaka, and your mother used to be adamant about not forming friendships with anyone. But now look at where we are."

Smiling, Kyoko mused "Indeed. Your father and I are married, we had you, and soon Aunt Toko and Uncle Hiro will be giving you a cousin."

After Kiki's fifth birthday, Toko and Hiro told the Naegis that they would be expecting their first baby around Christmas. Kiki cheered at getting a new playmate while Kyoko smiled softly and Makoto boisterously congratulated them, hugging them both and promising to hire two new substitute teachers so that he could give them full parental leave.

A thought crossed Kiki's mind; she looked at her father and asked "But Daddy, why wasn't Aunt Toko in love with Uncle Hiro?"

"…Well, pumpkin, believe it or not none of us were especially fond of Uncle Hiro when we were in high school. You'll hear one reason why later in the story."

"Really? What happened, Daddy?"

Chuckling, Makoto assured her "Tomorrow, Kiki."

Pouting, Kiki grumbled "Stupid cliffhangers…" before obediently nestling into her pillow, her parents tucking her in and kissing her good night before the young girl fell into slumber.