The Popular Girl
There's a place in your heart where nobody's been. Take me there - Rascal Flatts
Nicole watched as the guy threw her the all of his cigars shitting himself in the process no doubt, 'Here. Here! Take it all!'
He stood up and started to run in the opposite direction of the docks. Well, that was that.
She rolled her eyes and took only the box she paid for. What? She's a bitch, not a thief! She hoped her dad would appreciate it now even more since she almost became a victim of a crime. Again.
She turned around and started to walk away though she heard the noise behind her. She knew he was there. But she was too pissed to care. This fucking BS kept on happening to her like she was some trouble magnet. Like sure she had a habit of meeting with shady people and doing questionable things, but did it really mean she should end up in these damsel-in-distress situations? Not to mention how did she manage to walk this city for sixteen years without running into the asshole with all the bullshit and drama she caused not once but now couldn't shake him even if she wanted to?
'Still not letting go of the dark alleys, ha?' she frowned at the sound of the Brooklyn accent, but like hell, she would be the first one to give it. Just no. No way in the freaking hell, she was giving in and just no! He pissed her off. He made her furious more than any guy ever. She was not giving in and starting a fight with him because that was clearly what he wanted as he continued to follow her and talk.
She continued to walk. She could do this. She was a Diaz. She could walk with her head raise high and not give a flying fuck about him and what he had to say. She was a strong independent chick who could do whatever she wanted and stick to it.
'Nicole, I...damn it, Nicole, just fucking stop!' he snapped at her and she turned around and flipped him a birdie.
Raph's eyes widened shocked before he frowned and grabbed her elbow, 'Damn it, Nicole. We have to talk.'
'Fuck off!' she pushed away from him knowing the moment she spoke to him she wouldn't be able to hold herself back. The words flowed from her like a monsoon.
'Get your fucking disgusting hands off me! I don't have to do anything with you. Just because we had sex you have no right to just grab me when you feel like it. You cave-turtle!'
He figured that if she kicked him right in the groin it would hurt less than this. He stepped away giving her a bit of space because honestly, she was right. Who was he to ghost her for weeks and now wanting to talk with her? Grabbing her? It was messed up.
'Nicole.'
'Just leave me the hell alone, okay? What? We fucked it was fun. We don't have to be besties now,' she said like an angry bulldog in his face, but he could hear she was...hurt.
He was a fucking idiot. He didn't want things to get messed up because of Jay and Leo, but damn it, he didn't want to hurt Nicole. Hurting himself was fine, but her...that was the last thing he wanted to do. He just...he supposed because of how she acted she wasn't too invested in him. After those photos and stuff...he just... he wasn't sure anymore what he was thinking. But one thing was for sure, Jay was spot on. When people cut people out they don't just hurt themselves they hurt the others as well. He hurt her no doubt or illusion about that, but the question was did he hurt her more or less than if she knew about Leo and Jay?
'I-I'm sorry,' he said feeling the words sounding weird from him, 'I didn't mean to hurt you-'
'Don't kid, yourself,' she flipped her hair giving him trying to look cool and collective but given what Jay told him and what little he would like to think he knew about her, he could see through her facade. She was very angry and very hurt even if she pretended she wasn't.
'It was nothing.'
She turned around and started to walk away while he felt like a fucking asshole. Yeah, it was nothing which is why she is so pissed.
He shook his head and looked around before he started to walk after her. She stopped abruptly and turned around, 'The hell are you doing?'
'Making sure you get home safe,' he said calmly.
She let out a frustrated noise and he was sure she would tell him to fuck off again, but instead, she rolled her eyes and continued to walk. He walked behind her until he had to jump the roof because she got back to the populated areas.
He noticed she kept on looking back at him as if to see if he was really there. He was all the way, until her Upper East Side home.
He didn't wait around. He figured she had enough of him and only let him guard her as she went home because she couldn't stop him. This would probably take more mending than he was used to ever did. Raph was used to mending and apologizing for this behavior. He was annoyed when he had to do it. Straight out didn't like it, but yeah, he was more or less used to it. He even managed to develop a specific way how to apologize to each of his brother, master, and April in a way that was making it easier to do so. Apologizing to Nicole, however, was a new one. He insulted her sure, but it was more or less her forgiving him after she saved his shell from the subway. This would require more time and effort though, and he had no idea where to start really.
He met up with Mikey a little after and they patrolled together because people always went a bit more nuts during the holidays. His brother was more or less a welcoming distraction annoying the shit out of him with his jokes and bullshit not to mention a small competition about who will get to the other part of the city faster. He won although he almost suspected his brother let him win.
They took down some armed robbers and when it came close to the early hours called it a night.
'Hey, you cool with Jay around now, right?' asked Mickey all of a sudden once they got to the tunnels. Raph was a bit surprised he started the topic since during the holidays he showed if he could say so himself a lot of hospitality to Jay, well, at least what when it came to him. He wouldn't start being all goodie goodie but even Leo told him on a few occasions that he was thankful he acted decently toward the blonde.
'Yeah, she ain't so bad,' said Raph and shrugged his shoulders his head still full of a different girl.
'Yeah, I like her. She's funny but really nice even if she has this resting bitch face sometimes,' he said and jumped a bit splashing the sewer water at Raph's feet.
'Knock it off!'
Mikey grinned for a second before he fell into a bit of a serious look, 'You wonder if other girls could be like her? Like totally acceptable of us? Of our extremely handsome faces and bodies?' he asked and showed his muscles on the arms causing Raph to roll his eyes.
'You saying Leo and Jay did the dirty? Cause if ya are I don't want to talk about it.'
'I'm pretty sure Leo is a too modest monk for that kind of frisky behavior,' said Mikey and put his hands behind his head, 'And Jay looks like a good chick.'
'Just cause a girl puts out, she isn't automatically a slut, bro,' he said before he could stop himself. He knew Mikey wasn't implying anything not even close, but his thoughts rushed to Nicole again and he couldn't help it. He still had a bad taste in his mouth ever he thought about those nasty things he said to her.
'Yeah, I know that, Mo's...,' he paused for a moment before he shook his head, 'It's nothing.'
'She did the deed? She still has that boyfriend of hers?' asked Raph trying to fill his mind with something else.
Mikey looked visibly down, 'No. Not really.'
Raph frowned consumed, 'Then what's the problem then?'
His brother sighed, 'It's messy and complicated. Well, not really but sort off? She had this dude, but they weren't really dating and now she wants to stop seeing him more or less, but acts all weird about it. I mean she told me things. Really shitty things he did, and some she did, and said she wanted to get him out of her life, but now she's all weird and I don't know.'
Raph wanted to ask more when Mikey continued, 'I spoke to Jay about it? You know the teenage girl's point of view and all. And she thinks that maybe Mo isn't really done with the guy. That maybe she just now feels embarrassed and ashamed to talk to me about it. Or maybe now she really is ashamed that she told me all that and thinks I look down upon her. I thought about it and it made sense. Both things, but right after she was done with the asshole, things were good, only after the subway incident they started to feel weird.'
Raph nodded, 'No offense, but Jay's first idea sounds more likely to me. But we can't know for sure. The only one who does is Mo. So if you're losing your marvels over it, ask her. What else can you do?'
'I don't want to pressure her. She feels upset whenever I ask her something about it all,' confessed Mikey and Raph sighed. Looks like he wasn't the only turtle with women problems.
He chuckled humorously thinking about it, 'Funny, last year we barely accepted we had April in our lives, now we deal with teenage girls.'
Mikey smirked, 'Yeah, me with Mo, Donnie with coma girl, Leo with Jay. The only turtle missing is you, bro. But guess that makes sense since you're so ugly.'
Raph swung his palm at the back of his head, but Mikey jumped dodging it which caused them to play tag until they were inside their home when Mikey rose his hands.
'Ultimate tag champion!'
Raph hit him over the back of the head, 'Not even close.'
They continued to walk up toward their rooms before he paused, 'For the record, you're a good friend Mikey.'
The turtle looked at him and smirked although his words were a bit serious, 'Well, my number of friends is pretty small so I should be good to the ones I have.'
'Yeah,' agreed Raph. He and Nicole weren't friends. Not even close, but he did feel that they were something and he let her down pretty hard.
Nicole was at the rage. Literal rage. She was pissed before, then sad, then acting like it wasn't a big deal but now it was rage.
FUCKING TURTLE MOTHERFUCKER!
He just had to show up. He just had to. He couldn't like not show up like once. Just one damn time.
She was annoyed pacing around her room. She wanted to call Jay but they were supposed to meet tomorrow anyway and go visit Kim again and Jill was MIA since she fell into the sex haze with her older guy.
Honestly, at this point, she was considering calling fucking David to blow him again just to fucking feel numb again or something.
She grabbed her bag of cigarettes and went to smoke when she remembered someone and hurriedly texted.
N: Hey, want to come over and relive our day on the roof?
Green Head: Same place? In 30?
She quickly rushed out of her room already changing her name from Pink Head. She had a group project with her that one time back when her hair was green. They exchanged numbers although they never really texted each other.
'Heading out, honey?' asked her dad who went from his room to the kitchen.
'Yeah, just for a bit,' she told him and went to kiss him on the cheek.
He put his hand on her shoulder to look at her, 'Don't worry about it. I know you're a big girl and can handle yourself. I was no different growing up.'
Nicole smiled at him. Her dad was well strange. There were times Nicole felt like they were more alike than anyone in her family. She felt very close to him at times more than to mom, but she was a different cup of coffee altogether.
'I heard your mom sent you something,' he said and Nicole thought back to the small gift box she didn't open yet. It was probably some jewelry that would look way better on her than Nicole, but hey, that was Anna Diaz for you.
'Yeah, something tacky,' she grinned and her dad chuckled, 'Your mom was never the tasteful one. I did try to talk to her about spending the holidays with you.' He only came last night from their trip. She did wonder why so early though.
Nicole shrugged her shoulders, 'Don't waste your breath. Mom is… mom.'
He nodded, 'Don't be too hard on her though. She had a different life than you, you know?'
Ah yes, the sappy story of how her poor mom came from Mexico with nothing but a small traveling bag looking for a better life before she just so happened to come across a starting quickly going rich Latino man from an ambassador family.
Nicole didn't really understand how someone could play such a naïve person at times and manage such high-level scheming, but that was just mom. She quickly realized she needed to tie Julian down and got conveniently pregnant with her.
Not to mention played nice enough during the divorce to get enough money from him.
'Sure, a real-life Cinderella story,' she said knowing the sarcasm was evident which her dad let her know by a pointed look.
'Sorry, you're right,' she lied knowing she couldn't get on his bad side when Molly was waiting for her and she needed to go to fucking not blow up about Raph.
They said their goodbyes and she rushed to her car flooring it to be there faster.
She managed to beat Molly by five minutes but she still flipped her hair and eyes her car with distaste, 'Took you long enough.'
Molly rolled her eyes and then typed something on her phone: Don't play a bitch. I saw you pass me on the orange light.
She rolled her eyes, 'Orange means go faster to make it!'
Molly shook her head and put away her phone before she nodded and Nicole who put her hand against the pocket of her coat. She still had some stash left from Jill, luckily. Since lately she was avoiding her usual supplies who turned out to be greedy dicks. Shocker. No code among drug dealers.
They managed to get up the ladder to the roof and sat up on the roof like before Nicole easily lightening one up before taking a blow. It wasn't as strong as most of the stuff she took, but it still got a decent kick.
She passed it on and Molly nodded at her as if asking what was up with her calling.
'Just felt like getting out and getting high,' she said and watch the girl with pink hair take a blow. In the dark and with her skin tone it was hard to even see the bruise which had before winter break.
Molly returned the joint to her and then shrugged her shoulder before pointing at herself as if asking why she asked her here.
It was seriously weird how good could Nicole read her, or maybe Molly was just that used to having to ask people without saying anything.
'Guess, I missed you,' she smirked seductively, 'You know our last date turned out to be quite okay.'
Molly rolled her eyes but smiled a bit as well looking up at the sky.
'So how are your holidays?' she asked and Molly looked at her before she shook her head.
'Yeah, mine too. Everything sucks. Doesn't matter if it's Christmas or not,' said the Latina and watched as Molly brought up her phone and frowned.
Nicole caught 4 missed calls on the screen and then another from At your own risk
'Whoa,' she commented, and Molly quickly ended the call and put the phone away shrugging her shoulders.
'Mr. Anger Issues?' she shouldn't ask. It was none of her business, but it felt so weird that Molly Jones could have such a wide range of social life while she was the loser who didn't even have anyone to smoke a joint with.
Molly didn't move for a moment but eventually nodded and Nicole smirked knowingly, 'Let me guess. He regrets everything and wants to make amends? Get back together? Says he loves you and only you?'
The girl was quiet for a moment before she pulled out her phone switched to airplane mode and started to text something.
Something like that. Luckily, I have been avoiding him since, and he hasn't stopped by yet. But it's a matter of time. I can't run from him forever.
'What are you gonna do? Talk to him?' asked Nicole and passed her the weed as she furiously texted.
Avoid him until then. I can't talk to him. I just can't. I feel sick to my stomach whenever I just think about talking to him or seeing him. If I saw him on the street I would probably start running. He really fucked me up. I can't stop thinking about how scared I was when started to punch me.
Nicole frowned, 'Wait, there was more than one punch?'
Molly looked away seemingly caught off guard like she didn't want to reveal so much, 'Well, you really need to avoid this guy, or report him then.'
The other girl shot her a look and Nicole nodded, 'Yeah, I get it, but still. If a guy punches you, it's bad, but if he gives you a full-on beatdown that's horrible. You... I don't know you got to do something. Get a taser or something or rape whistle anything. Join kung fu,' she said thinking about Raph for a moment.
Molly shrugged her shoulders while taking another drag before typing, Maybe a taser wouldn't be so bad. I have a bat in my room though.
'Use it and break his knee,' encouraged her Nicole and the other girl smirked probably imaging it.
They fell into a bit of silence after that before Nicole asked, 'Is he someone from school?'
Molly didn't nod or shake her head just gave her a look which clearly said please, don't ask me that. But in a way that was an answer.
Nicole nodded and looked out into the sky thinking about the time, she got hit with a gun and almost shot, 'When I got hit, I throw a party.'
Molly looked at her blinking and the other girls shrugged her shoulders and took the weed from her, 'I was feeling strange. I was afraid but also buzzed. For me, it wasn't all that horrible experience as something real, something which made me feel alive, even if in a bad way.' She remembered the moment she first saw Raph and how he lightened up a fire inside her by calling her a Junkie Whore.
Asshole
She couldn't help but smirk at the memory. It was still a good one.
'My point is, you need to find something which will give you back your power and not be afraid of the fucker. Prove to yourself you can take care of yourself, and he can't hurt you. Just something like that. I will be good for you.'
Molly seemed to actually listen and consider her words before she smirked and typed something, Nicole Diaz therapy with weed 101
'Blow me,' she said and let out a long three small circles of smoke, before winking at Molly then wrote, 'What about you?'
'Mr. Jackass who had been ghosting me for almost a month finally decided to show up and pissed me off even more. I get he doesn't want to be with me,' she said feeling the pain behind her own words, 'Fine, whatever, I'm over it, but he clearly does so why the fuck won't he or give me a good reason why he can't? Just fuck!'
'Maybe you're just pissed you're not getting what you want for the first time ever.'
Well, that was very untrue.
'Yeah, right. Trust me just cause I have a nice face and ass and car which doesn't sound like a dying cat,' Molly elbowed her side and Nicole chuckled before she continued, 'I'm in no way getting everything I want. My parents are divorced. Mom is more like an annoying younger sister you sort of love-hate, dad is hot and cold on me all the time. Stepmom is trying too hard. Boys only think of me like the slut who will blow anyone and I have like two friends and one of them is Jill so,' she said before frowned. Damn, the stuff was trippy.
Molly watched her for a moment. For a person who couldn't say anything, it sure looked like Molly talked a lot inside her mind. Like even now she was analyzing and everything Nicole told her which was not good because really Nicole didn't even mean to get that real with a girl she tormented for the better part of freshman year while smoking a joint on the rooftop of her old dancing class.
The Afro-American girl typed something before she showed her her phone, Well, maybe he's the only true thing you actually ever wanted.
Nicole continued to look at the at the screen instead of the girl before she looked away, 'Yeah, maybe.'
After a while, Molly tapped her shoulder and showed her her phone, That, special?
Nicole frowned before she sighed not even sure why she said the next thing she did, 'Yeah, really special.' Because he was. That was the fucking problem. Raph did something to her. She didn't know what. She couldn't explain or rationalize it, and she sure as hell couldn't overcome it. He just did something to her and ruined her. Maybe because he was so different than anyone and not just in a mutant-turtle kind of way. He had this attitude, brutal humor which made her want to go to an argument with him just to hear all the ways he could get himself out of it or fight her back. And the hero part? Fuck, she never even liked comic heroes like Superman, Batman, Spider-man and whoever, but his heroic act was definitely a pantie dropper. Why the fuck did he continue to help assholes who wouldn't even thank him, or appreciate it, or call him a freak? It was beyond Nicole's understanding, and it really did something to her mentality whenever she thought about him. That was the problem. That was why she was so damn hooked on that stupid turtle hero because he was so different than anyone else, he got under her skin and refused to get out.
She felt Molly touch her cheek and realized she was smiling.
Stupid turtle hero making her smile like a lovesick puppy even with his BS.
Her phone vibrated, and she pulled it out surprised it was a text from him.
Did she somehow manage to get him to write to her with her mind?
She opened the text and then came to the second one.
'What the fuck?' she almost shouted so shocked she didn't even care if someone heard her, unlike Molly who started to feverishly look around if no one did.
Nicole then stood up, 'Watch closely, I'm about to end this guy's entire career,' she told Molly who gave her an awkward thumbs up before she dialed his phone.
Raph knew it was pathetic and would probably beat the shit out of anyone who would say he did it, but here he was checking Nicole's insta for new photos just to know what was going on her life. It wasn't hard to find once he set his mind to do so. He didn't do so before because he was holding himself back, but after seeing her last night looking so upset he just couldn't help himself.
There were several pictures of her and Jay, then some of her and some Jill (who he recognized as the drunk blonde friend she took home before Christmas) and then there was a guy named David who was obviously kissing her on the cheek in one pic.
He cursed under his breath. Could it be that she got a boyfriend? So fast like...the fuck did he care? They weren't anything. They just had fun as she put it. It didn't mean anything. Obviously not to her.
He took sighed and tried to calm down by Master's breathing technique. It took a moment, but he managed.
It wasn't right. If it didn't mean anything she wouldn't care, and he knew for a fact she did. Either it meant just that she thought he was better than that, or she liked him a bit, it wasn't meaningless.
He went to the boy's account and instantly knew he hated him though. He was into sports and looked like he was the life of a party not to mention had plenty of photos with Nicole. He was a handsome guy and with Nicole next to him they looked like some power couple. For a moment of pure insanity, his thoughts let Nicole's face as she moaned on top of him only for this time it to be on top of this dude.
Raph threw his phone across the room.
Damn his fucking thoughts and feelings.
He was turning into a pathetic loser. So she had a boyfriend or whatever. They never promised each other anything. It was a fun night, and wasn't he the one who never text her back? So why the fuck was he now angry? He should be glad. She was getting over him and would end up less hurt than if she later found out about Jay. The blonde didn't tell her about Leo so obviously she wasn't planning to so Raph was in the clear and that was good.
After a moment of just laying on his bed pitting himself like a pathetic teenager, he got up and walked to his phone picking it up. He went to the text messages from Nicole because even if he was never planning to see her face to face again and was risking someone like Mikey or Donnie checking his phone. He didn't have it in him for his first girl who thanked him, kissed him, and had sex with him to be kept in his phone as Junkie Whore even if it was him who said it in an act of pure rage.
She left him twenty-two messages. Going from casual comments to start up a conversation, too worried about if he was home alright or if something happened, to passive-aggressive to none. He tried to ignore them before not bothering to open them and let himself feel it. She was worried.
N: Look, you had a concussion even if you're busy ...just let me know you're alright.
R: I'm sorry, I'm an asshole. You deserve better.
He wrote and sent not sure if she would even reply. After ten minutes of nothing he sighed and wrote again. If they were really done, if he really fucked it up beyond repair, he would accept it, he would respect her choice, but he would always care for her and make sure she was alright if he could.
R: For what is worth thank you. If you ever need help just let me know. Bye, Nicole.
That was that. That would be his closure. He couldn't do this to himself anymore either. She didn't want to see him. She made it loud and clear and she had every right-
She was calling him.
Raph froze for a second not sure if he wasn't just dreaming, but no. Nicole was flickering over his screen and the melody he had for calls was echoing in his room.
He picked up not even sure he was breathing until he heard, 'Bye? You're telling me bye? Are you completely stupid, motherfucker?'
He looked around the room not sure what to do or say hearing her furious tone.
'You said you didn't want to-'
'So fucking what? You text me bye to have the last word? And what the fuck was it about if I ever need your help and then bye? What is your problem?' she shouted at him and then snapped something like gilipollas and idiota and Raph felt himself turned on wondering what sort of other Spanish words she would use if he got close and personal with her again.
'Are you listening to me?'
'Of course, I am. How could I not be when you're shouting so loud probably people in another state are listening,' he said back before he could stop himself not that he wanted to feel a bit charged now, but not angry.
'Fuck you, seriously. Who do you think you are? I told you to leave me alone. I. And I said it making sure you knew I didn't want you to say anything else-'
'Are you this bossy to all your one night stands?' he asked matching her tone but not volume in case one of his brothers was close.
'Fuck you, Raph. You ghosted me, and now I'm done with you so go suck a dick. Asshole!' she yelled like a banshee before she hung up on him causing him to actually flinch.
He called her again. The hell does she think calling him and yelling at him like he was little kid or like she was his nagging wife or something. She straight out turned her phone off and he cursed under his breath crushing the phone in his palm for a moment before he wrote her.
R: I was trying to be decent. You didn't have to go full bitch mode on me.
It took about a minute in which Raph was trying to calm himself but she texted back.
N: Don't bother!
He almost let it go. He almost threw his phone on the nightstand and stormed out of his room to fight whoever was unlucky enough to meet him first, but then he had an epiphany of sort of watching the last text. She was talking to him. Even if she didn't want to see him and was upset with him, she still replied to his texts and called him. She still showed interest even if she was a furious mad woman shouting on him over the phone at least she was talking to him. At least she didn't delete his number and texts and ignored him making it clear they were done.
Raph swallowed a bit feeling something like hope growing inside his gut that maybe just maybe Nicole didn't hate him as much as he feared and maybe was giving him some sort of shot by arguing with him like that.
He looked at his phone and typed almost smiling a bit while doing so.
R: I don't get why you are so upset. Isn't this what you wanted? Me to talk to you.
N: You got to be kidding me right now, Raph. You ghosted me. I told you to fuck off. You wrote that ridiculous BS and now you are confused why the fuck I am mad at you? Did you hit your head or something?
R: I said I am sorry, but honestly, yeah, I am confused because you're the most illogical woman I ever met.
N: I'm the only woman you ever met, smartass.
R: I saved plenty of women in dark alleys, not just you, dumbass.
N: Fuck you!
It went on and on for over three hours to the point when Leo knocked on his door to tell him it was time for patrol. Even if a part of him was grateful seriously grateful for a shot at talking to her, another part of him, a more recent one was barely holding himself back not to stop altogether. It was exhausting. Seriously Raph argued with pretty much everyone he knew, minus Jay, but there was still time for that, and yet he never ever felt tired of arguing. Like physically and mentally tired of arguing to the point he actually understood why some loser guys on TV would just go all Yes, dear and roll with whatever their wives suggested because damn fighting with a woman was seriously exhausting. But it was something. It was spending time with Nicole for the first time in days and fuck it felt also really good. He knew he missed her. He knew so in his grumpy attitude at times and laying awake during the day thinking about her, not to mention the stab of a knife feeling inside his chest whenever Jay spoke about how sad Nicole was. But just the moment he got her to talk to him, even if shout or sent angry texts at him really showed him just how damn much he missed her.
He felt almost scared texting her that he needed to go on patrol tonight worried she might stop texting him all together.
N: Stay safe
R: I can text you when I get home
It took her a long while to reply to that one, but eventually, she did and he felt like a huge weight was lifted from his shoulder.
N: OK
Nicole really missed him. She knew she did before. Of course, she knew so. Fuck the last time she was this crazy about a guy was...well never. She just didn't realize how bad it was until she met him again, and that stupid dickface followed her home to make her safe, and then texted her that stupid text and purposely drawn her into a fight just to be able to write with her. Yeah, she missed him. She missed Raph so damn much that by the time the first hour of their furious texting passed she wasn't even really upset anymore just wanted to continue to write with him, talk to him, just anything which included him.
When he wrote her that he was heading out for patrol, she knew it was the crossroad. She could have not replied or said something dumb, but somewhat didn't want to and wrote what she actually wanted to. When he asked her if she wanted to know when he gets home she knew he understood it as well and that they were on somewhat of a path to recovery.
'So you texted the whole day?' asked Jay as she was stealing her gummy bears while they were waiting in Kim's hospital room talking. It was the third time they came since Christmas and Nicole was kind of getting used to the strange sadness of a hospital.
The brunette shook her head, 'More like a few hours before coming here and last night. He went out with his buddies.' After her almost hour-long argument with Raph, Molly finished her weed and waved her goodbye. Rude. While Nicole was still arguing with him. Eventually, it got turned down a bit because they both needed to part ways, but then it started all over again.
She didn't ask him since she was still having an absurd fight with him, but she thought that now it was darker sooner than later, he was probably allowed patrolling the city sooner too.
'So you guys are good then?' asked Jay throwing the green bear into her mouth. Even the beeping of the machine's Kim was hooked to was calming in a way now.
'More or less. Well not good, but he did show up and made an effort. But I am still upset he fucking ghosted me and he still didn't explain what happened so until he does no pussy for him.'
Jay almost choked on the gummy bear before shooting Nicole a look who shrugged her shoulders, 'If Kim was talking she would agree with me.'
The blonde rolled her eyes, 'If Kim was talking she would tell you not to be so vulgar. Besides are you sure about it? Do you trust him?'
Nicole thought about it. Raph saved her life like three times now. Even with being a virgin and totally different specie he made sure she was alright during sex. Despite his words and the way he grabbed her to stop her from leaving, he was never physically violent with her or forced her into anything. He didn't judge her about her past well not after she told him her side of things, 'I trust him almost with everything.'
'Almost?' asked Jay reaching out for another gummy.
Nicole shrugged her shoulders, 'Isn't there always some stuff you have to keep to yourself.'
'Like what?'
My heart
The thought almost made Nicole start choking before she controlled herself. She would rather die than to admit that, but maybe yeah, she couldn't trust him with her heart. He still didn't tell her why he didn't want to talk to her and what happened also she had a feeling it would be something serious which might cause more issues.
She couldn't say the first thought which crossed her mind, but she knew there was something about it. When she kissed him, she felt alive and wasn't spacing out like before. But more than that she felt shaken. Even if she was the more experienced one and in control, she felt shaken by the kiss like it was the first one. And there was this hunger she felt inside almost a fascination with everything which revolved around him. Who he was, what he did, why he did things? It was making her go nuts really. She was never in love with a guy. She knew so much. She didn't think she was in love with Raph either, but she cared for him a lot, and it was making her sappy which made her want to put on more makeup and go party out with boys until dawn. And it also made her want to wake up early tomorrow to catch him still awake and text with him some more.
'Just stuff, Jay. Did you tell loverboy everything?'
'I guess, I told him about the weirdo who tried to kidnap me, mom's exes, my therapist?' she shrugged her shoulders and Nicole was impressed. This was huge for Jay so to know she was letting it all go like that for Leo like it meant nothing really meant the guy definitely earned himself a big place in Jay's life.
It got Nicole thinking if maybe they were goods friends enough with Jay that she could meet the nice fella.
'The only things I didn't tell him were about your shit with Matt. Also is it me or is he like never here?' asked the blonde frowning a bit.
Nicole thought about it. They started to show up quite often here, almost like Kim's room was their new spot. They met with the redhead's parents, grandparents, some church family friends. A few times Carmen and the other cheerleaders but never Matt.
'Fuck, you're right. What a fucking asshole!' she snapped before shaking her head.
Jay looked over at Kim and so did Nicole. How did the nicest person imaginable ended up with an asshole like that was beyond her?
He wasn't sure why he ended up on her balcony. Raph had no explanation as to why he walked inside since she apparently was a fan of keeping the balcony door open while she had the heat on max. He just...he just needed to see her. The last couple of days they fell into a pattern of texting and arguing, and at least he was in touch with her, but he still missed her so damn much. He still craved her presence even more than before knowing how she sounded. He needed her.
He very carefully put his hand on her elbow only to be hit in the head with a freaking lamp.
'The hell-!'
'AU! Damn it, Nicole!'
He put his hand over his hurt head. Of course, she hit him with a lamp, he came to her room unannounced and touched her while she was in bed. Maybe the new blow into the head will finally knock some sense into him. What the hell was he thinking? Oh right, he wasn't because ever since she fucked him he couldn't think straight about anything.
'You're such an asshole!' said Nicole finally as she had been saying something the whole time but his head was ringing from the impact so loud, he must have missed it.
He looked up at her as she turned on the main light burning his eyes a bit and pushed his hand away.
'Let me see,' she said and carefully touched the skin below where it hurt the most. It wasn't too bad. Probably just a bruise. Damn, the girl hit him hard. It was so not cool that it turned him on, right? Not to mention made him feel damn proud that she could hurt someone like that.
He almost smirked at the thought.
'You're insane,' he mumbled to himself, but saw the disbelieving look on her face which meant she must have heard him, 'You got to be kidding me?'
She shook her head and stood up away from him. His skin immediately cold without her touch. Fuck, there was no one he was getting out of here without setting things right with her. He had to somehow without revealing Jay and Leo. He just had to. It would have been easier if everything he was preparing himself to say didn't drop out of his head the moment the lamp hit him.
'What are you even doing here?' asked the Latina crossing her arms looking annoyed but full-on cold or angry like before.
He straightened himself up. Why did she always have to look so damn hot and amazing? Even in a baggy large shirt and no makeup?
'Well, I wanted to see you.'
'Well, tough, I told you to fuck off last time-'
'Look, the reason I was ditching you was because of my family,' he said suddenly and she crossed her arms, 'How come?'
'Because meeting you, being with you that can get messy,' he said without really saying anything.
Nicole watched him still looking unreachable, but she asked, 'Why? I didn't tell anyone about you, and I won't. I would never go anywhere you tell me not to and risk your secret or whatever if that is you are worried about...oh...' she suddenly uncrossed her arms, 'Did your family told you not to see me?'
He shook his head, 'I didn't tell them. They would want to meet you and it would be too...complicated. Look, there is a very good reason why I tried to push you, push this,' he pointed between the two of them, 'away, but it's something which has something to do with my brother, and since it's not my stuff to tell, I can't. Do you understand?'
'Fuck no. You can't just say because I say so and expect me to be cool with it. I...,' she bit into her tongue from telling him something which would make her even more vulnerable, he could tell. It was different now. In her room, face to face, she had nowhere to run or avoid him, and she must have realized it too.
Nicole brushed her hair from her shoulder after a moment trying to probably get some control, 'So... if the thing which you can't say wasn't an issue?'
'I would text you nonstop. You wouldn't even be able to get me off your back...well maybe not only the back.'
She chuckled but tried to push it down unsuccessfully, it made Raph smirk. She looked cute like this. She was hot. So hot, but sometimes, she really looked cute.
'That was corny as hell, man,' she said but he could tell he made an impression.
She looked up at him seriously again but also small, open, vulnerable. Something they both have a problem with being, 'So what changed? Why did you come?'
Raph shrugged his shoulder. Admitting the mushy stuff was never his thing, 'I like you. I want to meet you and maybe I can't tell my family about ya or you about why is it a problem in the first place, but I want to hang out with you. You're cool. You're making me sound like a sappy idiot, but you make me feel stuff.'
He looked away and brushed the back of his head, 'And we don't have to do shit. We can be just friends or whatever. I don't meet a lot of people obviously, but even so, I never met anyone as cool as you even when you annoy the hell out of me sometimes. I know you have a boyfriend or fuck buddy so we don't have to-'
Nicole blinked for a moment before she smirked, 'Ha, so a media stalker as well.'
'Look, Nicole, I didn't stalk-'
He didn't have time to finish it as she grabbed him by the front of his gear and pulled him closer smashing their lips together. Even without the damn heels, she was Nicole Diaz, so of course, she knew how to get him to bend for a kiss.
His hand went to her lower back while the other got tangled in her hair. It was an instant. They moved as one as they always seemed to when it came to these things.
He kissed her deeply and hungrily letting out all those feelings and urges which were stuck inside him since their separation after their day in the motel.
He lifted her up and sat down with her circling him with her legs while her hands were already starting to undo his gear.
They broke the kiss so she could lift her shirt and toss it to the side leaving herself completely naked and willing in his lap. No panties apparently which was information he would gladly be tugged into his memory for later.
He was not sure if it was the best idea to do it in her bed since he was quite heavy but before he could ask her he was on his back with her on top of him.
They seemed to stop only for a second, their eyes meeting as he brushed a few pieces of her hair behind her ear revealing her face so open, so exposed, so real, so Nicole. She was a fucking work of art.
'I missed you.'
'I missed you too.'
Then they continued kissing and touching and riding each other until the first crack of sun came into Nicole's bedroom.
A.N: Hey, I decided to sort of to somewhat return to this story, at least until another writer's block. Thanks, everyone for reading and support and sorry it took so long to update.
