Hi everyone! Thank you so much for coming back to read this chapter! Your support and love of this story is what makes me so happy to write. You guys are my inspiration, so thank you :) Depending on when I make up my mind, there's only one or two chapters left (probably two). I just want to thank everyone who has been here since the very beginning. You watched this story grow with me, and it's one of my favorites I've ever written.
Love You, Lose You will be updated us usual as this is. It's going to be a whole new book, so make sure you check out my account to see when it's posted! I'll let you guys know, too :) here's Chapter 12!
Chapter 12
It was times like this when Robin wished he had taken the scholarship Belmont offered him. He loved Regina, and he knew he made the right decision to stay with her, to take the break he wanted from the beginning, but after months and months and months of sitting around and waiting for something, anything, to happen, he knew deep down where he belonged.
And even though that was with Regina for the rest of his life, right now, it was Belmont.
Now, it was Regina's senior prom, and somehow, they never seemed to have the right timing. They had gotten into a fight about practically everything and anything, both frustrated and pissed at the situation they were in. Regina felt guilty about holding him back from his dreams, and Robin felt guilty about wishing he had left.
The last nine months had been terrible, and somehow, Robin felt like it was the beginning of the end.
….
September
"You sure you're going to be okay here by yourself?" Regina teased as she played with the strings of Robin's hoodie, and Robin smiled, kissing her forehead.
"Don't worry about me. Go enjoy your first day of senior year," Robin grinned, and Regina sighed as she nodded her head.
Regina turned when she heard Emma's footsteps dashing down the stairs, and she turned to her best friend with a smirk on her face, crossing her arms.
"You're late," Regina raised her eyebrows, and Emma only smiled broadly as she ran to the kitchen to grab her bag, along with an apple.
"Relax, this is our last year of high school," Emma pointed her finger with the facts as she took a bite of her apple, throwing her bag over her shoulder, "plus, we're already late. Why not be fashionably late?"
"I have perfect attendance, and if you are the reason for my first late pass-" Regina shook her head, but Emma rolled her eyes as she kissed Robin on the cheek, making her way to the door.
"Bye, Robbie. Have fun in the empty house," Emma laughed as she ran outside to Regina's car, and Robin chuckled.
"Alright, I'll call you later. Love you, bye," Regina smiled hurriedly as she pecked Robin's lips and closed the front door behind her, running to catch up with Emma, and Robin was sure there were at least a few smart comments thrown around before the car hit the road.
Robin sighed as he watched his sister and girlfriend drive away, and he smiled.
This was good. This was what he needed. It was time to explore the world.
October
Apparently, the 'world' Robin had been so persistent on traveling wasn't all it was cracked up to be. He had spent his first days of freedom driving out of state to New Hampshire, only to come back with a baseball cap and a few new picks to add to his guitar collection. He went to lakes, cities, restaurants, anywhere he could to absorb any new inspiration, but all it brought him was a feeling of loneliness in the pit of his stomach.
While Regina was achieving great things, he was just stuck. Robin was so proud of her, though. Regina was made the Select Choir leader the first day, had been asked to create a new mural to help support the art program, and already had a show-stopping solo for the winter concert in the bag.
Additionally, she magically had a 4.5 GPA in the span of two months, played gigs every Monday and Friday at local restaurants, and decided that learning the piano self-taught would be as fun as it was on the guitar. Robin had no idea how she was even breathing.
He was there. He stayed in Storybrooke to spend his time with her, to get his life and music together, but as the days seemed to pass by, he saw less and less of her.
Every time he showed up, climbing the tree up to her window to surprise her like it was the first time, she always made excuses about how she couldn't let him in. She was working, or she was practicing, or she was about to take a shower and crash.
He knew Regina had a very busy schedule. Hell, he had just been through it all. But he turned around at the airport for her… and he knew it was selfish, but he wished she would make the time for him, too.
November
Regina grinned as she spread her fingers across her favorite black sweater, the piece of clothing clinging to her curves just right. She stepped back to admire her button-through suede skirt, the light brown clashing perfectly for the Thanksgiving colors.
The doorbell rang and she dashed down the stairs, eager to be the one to get the door. Regina opened the large oak and saw Helen and Robert standing in front, behind them Emma and Robin.
"Happy Thanksgiving, Dear!" Helen exclaimed, wrapping her arms around the girl, and Regina smiled as she gave both parents large embraces.
"Love the outfit," Emma greeted as she bumped Regina teasingly, and the brunette shoved her inside before she could make any other wise comment.
Finally, it was Robin's turn, and Regina went breathless when she saw him. He wore a crisp pair of jeans with a gray dress shirt, and, damn, he looked amazing. Robin smirked as her eyes scanned over him for a little too long, and he chuckled, leaning in to kiss her cheek.
"Happy two years, Love," Robin whispered by her ear before pulling away. Regina smiled as she pulled on the collar of his shirt, keeping him close.
"Happy two years," Regina smiled, and she pecked Robin's lips. She opened the door a tad more wide so she could fit both of them inside, the cold starting to bite, but when Robin caught her hand and tilted his head towards the porch, Regina followed and closed the door behind her.
"What is it?" Regina asked as she furrowed her eyebrows, and Robin looked nervous as he rubbed the back of his neck with one hand, looking shy. Regina's heart melted at the look in his eyes, and she grinned back.
Robin reached into the pocket of his jeans, and Regina's breath caught in her throat when she saw a tiny velvet box in the palm of his hand. Her eyes went wide and one hand covered her mouth. Robin took a deep breath and smiled, taking her free hand.
"The past two years of my life have been the best, Love. I had a great life back in England, but being here with you is even better. I fell in love with you so hard and so fast, and I don't plan on that ever going away… I've seen every princess movie with Emma, and I don't know if I can promise you anything Charming-like, but I'll try my best," Robin smirked, and Regina smiled with a tiny aww, her hand falling to her side.
"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but I'm afraid we're a bit too young to run down to city hall. Plus, your dad would kick my ass," Robin and Regina chuckled, and Regina let out an anxious breath as Robin opened the tiny box.
Regina was left breathless when she saw the beautiful, simple diamond on the silver band. It was everything she never knew she wanted.
"I know I already gave you a ring for your birthday last year, but this one isn't going to turn your finger green in the matter of weeks," Robin smiled proudly.
"Right now, this is a promise ring. But in a few years, I'll replace it with something more fitting for the occasion," Robin winked, and Regina glowed.
Robin placed the ring on Regina's ring finger, and as soon as it was settled, Regina held it up in front of her, amazed by how the ring twinkled under the dim porch lights. Regina's heart melted as she looked to Robin with tears forming in her eyes.
"Robin, it's beautiful," was all she could manage to say, and Robin looked proud of himself for picking the perfect ring. Robin took both of Regina's hands into his, and immediately, Regina's chocolate brown eyes stared dreamily into Robin's crystal blue ones.
"I promise to come to every show, every concert, every fundraiser, and any other event you decide to pick up along the way. I promise to not only listen when you talk, but to be your personal punching bag for when you need to rant after a long day. But most importantly, I promise to love you," Robin whispered, and Regina cupped his cheeks as he leaned into her, pressing their foreheads together.
"If I wasn't already in love with you, I would be now," Regina sighed, putting her hands on his chest, "I love the ring… I love you… and I promise to never stop."
Robin smiled as he brushed the hair out of her face, and his touch lingered on her cheek. Regina blushed and looked up into his eyes under his eyelashes until he couldn't resist.
Robin completely swept her off her feet with one of the best kisses they'd ever had, and she came back to reality with a day-dreamy look on her face.
"I'm sorry we've spent so little time together lately. It's just that auditions for the musical are next week, and I was working on the winter solo with Mrs. Potts, then I had my shift at Granny's, and then there was this huge Calculus test I needed to-"
"Regina, it's alright. You never have to apologize for being busy, I understand. It just means that the time we do spend together, it needs to be spent right," Robin shrugged his shoulders with a tiny smirk, and Regina smirked back, running her fingers through his hair.
"You're right," Regina sighed, wrapping her arms around him for another kiss.
Regina and Robin turned when they heard the front door open, and Emma stood there with a smirk on her face.
"So, are you going to show me the ring or not?" Emma asked, and Regina chuckled as she walked over to her best friend.
Robin watched as both girls squealed and fanned over the ring, and Robin smiled to himself, watching the twinkle in Regina's eyes. The best friends acted as any pair would over this big of a milestone in a relationship, and Robin grinned when he saw Emma's goofy smile.
December
The audience stood on their feet as whistles were heard from every which way in the auditorium of Storybrooke High. Regina had just performed her solo, and it was clear to say the whole town was in love with her voice. Robin cheered and chanted alongside Emma and his parents, Cora and Henry sitting in the row in front of them.
Regina looked out to the crowd to see Robin, and he nodded his head as he continued clapping, a huge grin plastered to his face. Regina chuckled to herself as she smiled back, blowing a kiss to him from the stage. Regina looked around and mouthed the words thank you before walking off stage with a friendly wave, and with one final close of the curtains, the winter concert was over.
Robin was glad Regina spent so much time with Mrs. Potts rather than him. He was sure he could never do what she just did, hit the notes she just hit in front of the whole town, nerves having no place. Robin was happy his girlfriend was happy.
Even if he wasn't, he realized it didn't matter.
Robin met her backstage, and immediately, she ran to him, wrapping her arms around him. Robin smiled as he held to his chest, and she breathed into him, letting out all the shakiness and anxiety.
"Could you tell I was nervous?"
"Hell no, but the kids who went on before you sure were. And they should've been, knowing you were coming on afterwards," Robin gloated, and Regina slapped his chest. Robin smiled lovingly and leaned down to press a kiss to her forehead.
"You did amazing, Love. Trust me, no one could tell you were nervous," Regina smiled as she kissed him, so happy everything she worked so hard for was finally paying off.
A week after the winter concert was Christmas, and Regina and Robin spent it together with their families at the Locksley home. Cora and Henry had insisted on taking a family picture, and there were the four of them in front of the fireplace.
Cora, Henry, Zelena, and Regina. But someone was missing…
"Well, are you getting in here or not?" Cora smirked as she watched Robin remain at his seat on the couch, and Robin looked shy all of a sudden.
"I don't think-"
"Get up here, Locksley," Henry smiled, nodding his head, and Robin chuckled as he stood and found his way next to Regina. He wrapped his arms around her waist and brought her close, an appropriate distance between them, and Regina chuckled, shaking her head, never knowing how Robin was such a gentleman 24/7.
Instead of exchanging gifts for Christmas that year, Regina and Robin decided to save their money to spend a day in New York City. However, that didn't stop Robin from surprising his girlfriend with a private skating rink in his very own backyard.
Regina stood on the sidelines at first as she watched Robin warm up, as he claimed, and the natural easily felt at home on the ice. Regina sighed and leaned against the back door as she watched the love of her life soar freely, a certain type of smile on his face she hadn't seen in a while.
He looked genuinely happy.
Not one of those smiles he would give her when she apologized for having too much work, or the smile he showed her when she complained about high school and all its drama.
This was one that was truly happy…
Regina wondered if he was truly happy with her like he claimed he was.
January
"Come on, you need to eat," Robin sighed as he put the bowl of mac and cheese down on one of her textbooks. Regina continued to ignore him, writing down equations in her notebook, until Robin took her book and threw it into a different room.
Regina's mouth opened in show and she glared up to Robin, who was only holding out a spoon for her.
"Are you kidding me?" Regina rolled her eyes as she went to go get her textbook, but Robin stopped her, grabbing her arm and bringing her back to him.
"Regina, you've been at this for five hours now. Five. Do you even realize that? You got home at 2:30, called me, and then you got started at 3:00. It's 8:30, Regina, you need a break," Robin said sternly, not playing around anymore, but Regina just continued to glare at him.
"I can take a break when I'm dead, now move out of my way," Regina tried to push past him, but he was stronger than her, and she groaned as he kept her from the book she needed.
"Don't talk like that. Come on, at least take a few bites of the food," Robin sighed, exhausted, but Regina kept on fighting him, a newly ignited fire in her eyes roaring.
"The last time I checked, I didn't take orders from you. Now move out of my damn way before I make you," Regina shoved him away, and this time, Robin let her, too tired to continue fighting her.
Robin ran a hand over his face and stopped at his mouth for a moment before taking a deep breath and turning to her, trying to keep his patience.
"I've been in here the whole night, and you haven't said a single word to me. It's like you don't even notice I'm here," Robin explained, and Regina slammed the book down back on the desk in the living room once she made it back there.
She turned to Robin with pure hatred in her demeanor.
"Then why don't you leave? Just get out," Regina rolled her eyes as she sat back down on the desk chair. Robin was appalled. She'd never been so heartless to him before, and he had no idea how to even start acting.
"You know what, it's been a long day. Why don't we just sit down, watch some tv, and then-"
"Get out, Robin! Just get out!"
Robin stood dumbfoundedly in the middle of the Mills living room, his heart slowly breaking at the sound of the love of his life telling him to leave.
"What's wrong, Love, let me help you, just-"
"Do I have to call the damn sheriff? Get out of my house right now, Robin!" Regina exploded, staring him down with a look he's never seen from her before.
Before she actually did call the sheriff, Robin grabbed his coat and keys as he made his way out of the Mills residence, closing the door gently.
And if Emma saw him with tears streaming down his face, hiding out in his car past midnight, she didn't say a word.
February
She's still wearing the ring. As long as she's wearing the ring, everything is fine, Robin told himself as he sat down in Granny's. He had the table all by himself, and really, he shouldn't be complaining. There were couples and families that didn't get to eat in the diner because it was so packed, but it was his reservation.
Well, for the next five minutes it was.
It was Valentine's Day, and Robin never remembered hating the day as much as he did then.
Red and pink paper hearts hung from the lights above each table, and all he wanted to do was rip every single one of them to shreds, throw his own heart out the window throughout the process.
Ever since that night at her house, Robin had not gone over there again, and Regina hadn't gone over to his house. She sent him a text the morning after to apologize to him, explaining she was exhausted and took all her stress out on the wrong person.
Robin forgave her, like he always would, and even though they were still together, it was tense. It was like either was scared to make the wrong move, and all it took was one word to make them fall apart.
Robin hated it.
He had called her days before to remind her of their reservation at Granny's for the special day, but apparently, she had forgotten. It was officially an hour past the time they were supposed to meet, and Robin knew he wouldn't be seeing her that night.
Robin sighed and shook his head as he grabbed his leather jacket and made his way out of Granny's, never even hearing Granny's sorrowful goodbye.
Robin made his way home, but not screaming at the top of his lungs in his car and kicking every garbage bin by the mailbox. Robin slammed his car door shut and tried to channel his anger, knowing Helen, Robert, and especially Emma would start to worry if they really knew how things were going.
As far as his family knew, there was no trouble in paradise. He had made the right decision to stay in Storybrooke, and he and Regina had not changed.
Damn, how everything seemed to start crashing down.
Robin took a deep breath and made his way to his front door, but was surprised when he found a note taped to it. He could already tell it was Regina's handwriting, but he was so pissed that he just wanted to crumble it up and toss it in the trash.
But it was Regina.
And he would always love her, even when he hated her.
Just come inside, please.
Robin took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, counting to ten.
He knew he was being unfair. Regina was never unfair to him and she never started any fights. But after kicking him out of her home for no reason then standing him up on Valentine's Day? It seemed like everything was slipping out of his hands so fast.
Robin turned around and noticed Regina's front porch lights still on. Robin sighed and kept his head down, shamefully walking down his drive, across the street to her front porch, doing what the note told him.
Maybe this was it. She wanted him to come inside so she could let him down slowly, without anyone watching. Maybe she realized she didn't want such a disappointing loser as a boyfriend.
Robin opened the door and swallowed hard, regaining his composure before closing the door behind him. Robin furrowed his eyebrows when he saw candles lighting up the whole downstairs, rose petals starting at his feet all the way into the kitchen.
Robin finally looked up to where the rose petals stopped, and he froze when he saw Regina standing tall at the end of the hall, dressed in a black form-fitting shirt and a red mini skirt, her black high heels still giving him the height advantage.
She looked stunning, she always did, but Robin was so hurt and angry about their situation that he ran his fingers through his hair then shoved his hands in his pockets, shrugging.
"If you didn't want to waste your time with me tonight, you should have called. I would've cancelled the reservation and not have sat there for over an hour, looking like the dumbass I am," Robin exclaimed roughly, and Regina looked like she had just been run over by a car.
"Oh my god, the dinner," Regina gasped as she went pale, and realization hit Robin.
She really did forget.
"Are you serious right now? It's Valentine's Day! Why wouldn't I have plans for us?!" Robin got too angry too quick, and he bit his tongue, knowing he shouldn't be yelling at her. This wasn't her fault. She was busy. It was her senior year. This wasn't her fault…
"Robin, I'm so sorry… oh my god, you sat there and waited?" Regina asked, horrified, and Robin chuckled darkly as he stared her down, his hands coming alive with his words.
"Of course I did. And you would've known that, god forbid you pick up the damn phone for once," Robin couldn't help the bitterness that oozed out into his words, and he beat himself up internally as he watched Regina go even more pale, tears starting to form in her eyes.
No, please don't cry. Please don't cry because of me.
"I, I left it upstairs… Oh god, Robin, I am so sorry. I ruined this whole night before it even started," Regina frowned as she put her head in her hands, and Robin was sure the tears had already started coming.
"I had this whole night planned out. We were going to have a candlelight dinner in the kitchen, and then we would dance out on the back porch, and then you would take me inside and we would watch a movie, and before you left I would give you this whole speech about how much I've messed up these last few months and… and I forgot you had something else planned," Regina sniffled, wiping away her tears, and Robin's heart broke as he watched his love fall apart.
He knew he could never stay mad at her for long.
Robin walked down the hallway and scooped her up in his arms, hugging her tight to him. Regina was surprised he was even getting near her, and it took her awhile before she even wrapped her arms around him. Her mind kept telling her she didn't deserve it, to be loved by Robin when she wasn't even half as good as he was.
"Hug me back, Regina," Robin whispered, but he felt her head shake against his chest. Robin frowned and closed his eyes, holding her closer.
"You don't deserve this. You should be with someone who doesn't forget to send a goodnight text, or ask how a job interview went, or a Valentine's dinner. You shouldn't be with me when there are so many other girls who would never kick you out because you were worried about them," Regina cried, still unresponsive to his hug.
"I don't care about all that stuff, Regina. In the long run, it doesn't matter. And don't tell me what I do and don't deserve, because I am in love with you, and there is no going back now," Robin spoke passionately and firmly, and he felt more tears dampen his shirt. He sighed but didn't move, continuing to speak to her.
"The honeymoon period wasn't always going to last, Love, we knew that. It's no one's fault, we just have to take deep breaths and remember that no matter how rough things are, it's always going to be me and you… we may be different people than we were last year, but change is good. It just reminds us how much we have to fight for," Robin whispered, and finally, Regina slowly wrapped her arms around him.
Robin let out a low breath in relief, holding her tight, burying his face into her hair.
"I'm scared I'm going to lose you," Regina whispered, and it pained Robin to hear her quiet, vulnerable words.
"You don't ever have to worry about that. I'm not going anywhere," Robin expressed earnestly, and Regina sniffled against him, her fingers clinging to the back of his jacket.
"I feel like I'm holding you back… I mean, last year you still spent every day with me, and that was your senior year. Why is this so hard for me?" Regina groaned, and Robin rubbed circles up and down her back soothingly.
"Because you are accomplishing more than half of the things I did. And I love that about you. You are ambitious, and adventurous, and you don't back down from a challenge. And you are not going to just stop being you because we're at different places now," Robin explained carefully, and Regina nodded her head reluctantly.
"I've been such a bitch," Regina sighed, and Robin smiled sweetly as he let her go, rubbing her arms up and down.
"Just a little," Robin shrugged his shoulders, and Regina looked sheepish.
"I don't want this to ruin everything we've been through. I love you, Robin, and I promise I'll be better," Regina nodded her head, and Robin frowned as he shook his head.
"Stop, you don't have to be better. You're already amazing… just make sure to check your phone at least once a day," Robin joked lightly, and Regina tried on a small smile.
It didn't reach her eyes.
March
Regina sat on her front porch, rubbing her sweaty palms on her jeans.
She had just finished applying to all the colleges she could, and she was completely exhausted. She had applied to Michigan State, Penn State, Oakland University, Yale University, and even Julliard. Her safety schools, University of Maine, Bates College, and Boston University, made Regina feel better, but she knew where she really wanted to go.
The night before, she had watched as Robin reapplied to Belmont, this time with even more impressive skills and elements added to his list. Regina could tell he was nervous about everything, knowing it was rare to get in the first time, but she reassured him with a loving kiss, holding him until his uneasiness went away.
She watched as his dreams slowly faded, and it killed her how he hadn't picked up his guitar in days. She couldn't help but feel like it was her fault he was losing hope, and she knew she had to do something.
But as her application to Belmont sat in the mailbox, she knew it was something she had to do.
Now she just had to pray they both made it in.
April
"You are such a dork," Robin laughed as Regina danced around in the kitchen with a wooden spoon, lip-syncing to the radio.
Regina continued to throw her own concert in the kitchen, and Robin only smiled with a sigh, happy that they were back to normal. It was almost as if the honeymoon phase was back… he realized how much he missed her.
Robin came back to reality when he felt water dripping from his hair, looking in shock to see Regina with the sink spray in hand, a bubbly laugh coming out of her. Robin shook his head with a grin as the devilish look in his eyes stared back into hers, which were daring him.
"You really wanna do this?" Robin asked with a smirk as he slowly began making his way over to her, and Regina grinned as she sprayed him one more time, her eyebrows raised in a challenge.
"I really do."
And that was how the happy couple made a mess of the Mills kitchen, water drenching both their clothes. The spray was long forgotten once Regina escaped Robin's hold, and they circled around the island before eventually, Regina was stuck in the corner of the room.
Regina's fingertips gripped the edge of the counter as Robin continued on his path to her, and once he put his hands on her hips, she was lifted onto the countertop, Regina gripping the lapels of his jacket.
It had turned from fun and games to not-so-innocent in a matter of seconds, and with Robin's hair all tousled up and his white t-shirt soaked, showing off his muscled chest, it made Regina want him more than she ever had before.
She wasn't stupid, she knew her boyfriend was all that. It wasn't just his eyes that were mesmerizing, and each day that passed that she didn't take the final step, it only made her want to bend her rules. But she had expectations for herself.
But Robin was so damn hot.
"I want you," Regina breathed between them, and Robin smiled as he kissed her lips. Regina held onto him tightly, fisting his jacket, but she groaned when he backed away slightly.
"I want you, Regina, so bad… but you know we can't. Not yet," Robin sighed, and Regina frowned as she hit her head against his chest, the most frustrated she had ever been.
"I made those rules up a long time ago, Robin. I never thought I would even have someone to do it with. Plus, they're so unrealistic. Do you know many kids who still haven't done it?" Regina raised her eyebrows, but Robin only smiled as he shook his head.
"I'm not going to be the reason you screw up your plans, Love. I think they are perfect, not unrealistic at all. The rest of the teens in this town are just too stupid to have standards," Robin reasoned, and Regina rolled her eyes.
"Just for once, I don't want you to be a damn gentleman," Regina groaned, and Robin chuckled as she quickly started coming back down to Earth. He brushed the hair out of her face and grinned.
"Oh, trust me, just wait until the night you graduate," Robin's eyes twinkled, and Regina smiled with a small blush.
"I want our first time to be special, Regina. And what I have planned is much better than what this would be," Robin nodded his head, and Regina sighed, knowing he was right.
"You suck," Regina groaned, and Robin grinned.
"I love you too."
Present
Robin took a deep breath as he got out of his truck, closing the door with a bang. He felt like he was going through deja vu. He was dressed in a tux, the insufferable tie residing around his neck, but he couldn't help but smile.
It felt like just yesterday he had walked down the same stone path to Regina's front door, picking her up for last year's homecoming dance. This time wasn't very much different.
Regina was pissed at him, he was sure about it, but he couldn't stay mad at her for long. They had had a long, tiresome fight hours prior, and all Robin wanted to do was wrap his arms around Regina and never let go.
Robin stood at the Mills front door with shaky hands, juggling Regina's corsage back and forth. It was a beautiful rose, which would match her red spaghetti strap dress with a side slit. No matter how many times he'd been with Regina, no matter how many ups and downs and circles they went through, she never ceased to give him butterflies.
Whenever she walked into the room, he became nervous, and he knew that was a good thing, but damn, he was sure he had never had as many butterflies before that night.
Robin rang the doorbell, and as if she had been waiting for him by the door, Regina opened it immediately. With one look at her, Robin was left breathless, but she kept her demeanor as her betraying heart warmed at the sight of him.
"Wow," Robin breathed, shaking his head back to life, "you look absolutely stunning."
"Thank you," Regina smiled the world's smallest smile, letting go of a breath she didn't know she was holding.
Robin helped her put on her corsage, and once Regina looked him in the eyes with that look, he knew it was game over.
"Regina, I love you, and that's not going to change because we had a fight. It's never going to change at all… I can't lose you, and I know what I said, but there is no place I'd rather be than with you. You… you give me butterflies when you walk in the room, and you laugh at my stupid jokes. Just because we're suddenly adults doesn't mean we want to be," Robin breathed, and Regina stared into his eyes with adoration, as if she needed the reassurance.
"You have believed in me since day one, Love. You have no idea how much that means to me, but if there comes a time where I have to choose my dream job or you, it's always going to be you… I don't want it, Regina. I don't want the stage, or the spotlights, or the fans. Not if you're not there to live it out with me. No amount of money in the world could be as valuable as you are to me," Robin held Regina's shaking hands, and she smiled, tears starting to form in her eyes.
"I know you are telling the truth, Robin, I promise, I do. But I keep replaying it in my head, about holding you back. And no matter how much we love each other, I won't stand in the way of your happiness," Regina frowned, but Robin only continued to smile like a lovesick idiot.
"You don't understand," Robin responded, shaking his head, "my happiness isn't being a singer/songwriter, it's you… I was angry, and I didn't mean a word I said earlier, Regina, I promise. I don't wish I had gone to Belmont, and even if I do miss it, you can't miss something you never had. And if I lost you, I would never recover. I don't need to recover from not going to college… I won't give up on my dreams if you don't give up on me," Robin spoke passionately, firmly, and before he could ramble on anymore, Regina pulled him down to her, kissing his lips in an urgent matter.
"I'm not giving up on you. I'll never give up on you, okay?" Regina stated, and Robin smiled as he wrapped his arms around her middle, pulling her in for an embrace.
Regina wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head against his chest, knowing that they would be alright.
If only she could jump to the future and see where she would be in a year.
Because it wouldn't be with him.
…
Earlier That Day...
Regina watched with a frown as Emma got into her car and drove off, wishing she hadn't left. Robin had shown up out of the blue while she and Emma were doing their nails for the prom, and Emma decided it was best to leave, seeing how she had spent the last five hours with Regina. The blonde let Robin have Regina to himself, but if only she knew that's not exactly what Regina wanted.
They were up in Regina's bedroom, Regina sitting on the edge of her desk chair, Robin standing by the doorway, silence greeting them both.
"Why are you staring at me like that?" Regina asked, almost pleading him to stop, and Robin furrowed his eyebrows.
"What do you mean?" Robin asked curiously, but Regina bit her lip and shook her head slightly, knowing it was best if she didn't bring it up right then and there.
"Nevermind," Regina sighed, trying on a smile, but Robin knew her better than that. After urging her to tell him what's on her mind, what this look entailed, Regina gave in.
"It's just… there's this stare you have. When you're daydreaming or thinking… or when you think I'm not looking… it's stupid," Regina shook her head, but Robin rolled his eyes as he made his way to her.
"Clearly it's not if it's bothering you. Just talk to me," Robin insisted, and Regina bit the inside of her cheek. She looked back up to Robin and let out a nervous breath, doubting this would end well.
"It feels like you'd rather be somewhere else," Regina whispered quietly, and Robin felt the urge to punch the wall.
He didn't know how many times he needed to tell her he was happy with her.
"Regina, we've been over this a million times," Robin groaned, putting his head in one hand, and Regina kept to herself, shaking her head.
"This is exactly why I didn't want to bring it up," Regina explained, and she got up out of her chair. As she was trying to walk away, Robin caught her arm and she stopped.
"What do I need to do? Do I need to put a sign above my head in neon lights that says I'm happy, or would that be too much?" Robin asked sarcastically, and Regina pushed his hand away from her arm.
"Maybe you should just go to Belmont like you were supposed to. I mean, that's where you always wish you are," Regina bit back fiercely, a newly ignited fire in her eyes.
"God, why aren't I ever just enough, Regina?! You act like being with me is such hell, when I thought we were finally past all this!" Robin exclaimed, and Regina didn't know how to react when he got mad at her.
But anger was good. It was easier than any other emotion. It was safe.
So she decided to fight fire with fire.
"We both know that ever since October you've wanted to change your mind about staying here, Robin! While I'm achieving things, you're just stuck, sitting at home with nothing to do and no one to talk to. If you were at college right now, maybe our relationship wouldn't be as rough as it is!"
"What do you want me to say? That I wish I would've left? Fine! You've got me! I wish I would've left, I would've been so much happier at Belmont! And who knows? Maybe I would've been so happy, I wouldn't come back! Is that what you want to hear, because there you go!" Robin screamed, and he was so caught up in his rapid thoughts that he didn't see the devastated, broken look in Regina's teary eyes.
"If you care about the truth so much, then why don't we just get everything off our chests? You are the one who is holding me back! I stayed just so I could be with you, and you can't even give me the time of the day most days! I could be studying and achieving great things like you, but I was stupid and chose love over everything else!" Robin breathed out. He froze when he realized what he just said, and when he turned to look at Regina, he saw a lone tear falling down her cheek.
His eyes softened and he felt like a knife had stabbed him in the heart when he saw the love of his life standing there, hanging on by a thread.
Robin shook his head and reached for her, grabbing her hand hurriedly, muttering apologies as fast as the malicious words left his mouth.
"I am so sorry, Love, I don't mean that. You know I don't, I love you, I'd choose you over anything every single time," Robin begged for her to listen, but Regina defeatedly pulled her hand away, as if there was nothing left to say.
Regina ignored the calls of her name as she walked to her closet, her fingers skimming the bottom of her prom dress.
"I paid $300 for this dress, and I am not letting it go to waste… you're taking me to the prom, but afterwards, you can do whatever the hell you want. Take a drive down to Nashville and stay there. Because I don't want you here."
Regina walked out of the room gracefully but broken, not letting Robin see her in any worse of a state.
Robin cursed himself as he kicked the leg of her desk, running a hand through his hair, not believing that just happened.
He let himself out of her room out the window, down the oak tree, and to his car, planning all the ways he would make it up to her. But first, he needed to buy her corsage, because he planned on spending the rest of the night by her side.
And every night after that.
