Trigger warnings: discussion of nonconsensual dissemination of images as well as relatively minor sexual assault, definitely sexual harassment, in this chapter. No violence or reference to violence involved. Chapter 29 (next chapter) will be clear of such, so if this will bother you, please skip ahead.

Chapter Text

The promised explanation to the house took three more shifts to actually happen. Everyone tried real hard to act as normally as possible around Casey, but it was going to take some time to "unsee" that, which she knew, and she knew Matt knew. She didn't press him for details. He explained a little that night, in the bedroom, mostly just that the meeting had been to get his testimony essentially, not that he accused of anything. What he'd thought was poor organization at House 29 was becoming something bigger and dirtier and Grissom was hunting it out like a bloodhound. Matt wasn't even told who the suspects were in his case, just that the department and CPD were working together with the Office of the Inspector General and state officials as well. While he seemed confident that there was a serious investigation going on, that didn't seem to help his "turtling" as Kelly had called it. He was his normal self on calls, but he was not socializing with anyone. He barely emerged from his quarters for meals. He did have a lot of paperwork to deal with, Chief hadn't been lying about having 'saved' some of it for him, but not enough to really explain his sudden disappearing act. Everyone knew he was self-conscious. No one seemed able to blame him. She also noticed, and she thought many other people did too, that he changed out away from the house, coming in to shift and leaving in his station uniform. She didn't know who had told them (maybe Kelly) to do it, but she also noticed that they all cleared out quickly from the showers after that house fire last shift, so Matt could shower when everyone was very obviously out in the common room. If anyone felt offended at his lack of trust in them, no one said anything or gave any sign of it.

All in all, Matt was doing alright, though. He was coping with it, at least. Maybe because most people who received the email (at least, most people they knew about) had gotten notice not to look before they did so. A few, like Chloe, pointed out that she never opened any attachment from someone she didn't know, and this was just good proof of why. As long as no one mentioned Donna Boden around him, he was pretty fine. She knew he was dealing with other stuff, though. He just wasn't talking about the other stuff.

They were all surprised to walk into the morning briefing on a Saturday and find several members of the department brass there, waiting for them. Chief Grissom was there. Matt took a spot in the farthest corner of the briefing room. Sylvie took her usual spot at a table with Emily. She left Matt to Kelly, who stood next to him in clear solidarity.

"Everyone is here, so let's get started." Chief announced, then turned to Commissioner Grissom. "Commissioner Grissom has some information to share with us."
"Thank you, Chief Boden." Grissom acknowledged. "I'll get straight to the point. Captain Casey's situation is still part of an investigation which the department is wrapping up over the next couple of days. Nonetheless, in order to respect as much as possible the privacy of Captain Casey, the department in agreement with the city and the state, has ordered that while the matter of the investigation and its results are public information, no names will be shared in any documentation. He will be referred to by generic information only. We expect everyone at this house to abide by that restriction and not to provide, confirm, or in any way indicate his identity to any entity or person other than an investigator from IAD or the city Office of the Inspector General."

Nods and general sounds of agreement went around the room. No one was going to be sharing anything. Even if they hadn't been ordered to keep quiet, no one wanted to make this any worse for Matt.

"Captain Casey was at House 29 officially to cover for Captain Polanshek's injury. Less officially, I needed a competent officer in a house with high turnover and a high number of internal complaints. Besides his general competence, even the people I've talked to who don't like Captain Casey agree that he's the type of officer to tell the complete and utter truth in a report, no matter what. He was aware of that secondary purpose to his work at House 29. He was not, and never has been, a 'rat'." Grissom pointed out firmly. "Neither my office, nor IAD, nor any other office, ever asked for or received anything from him except the usual reporting standards of a CFD captain. I want to make that completely clear."
"His reports have led to substantial reforms at House 29, including wholesale retraining on harassment, bullying, and sensitivity training, especially on second shift. They also led to restructuring of leadership at House 29. I want to make it clear again that these decisions were made based on the same reports he fills out for any incident, that there was nothing extraneous asked of him, just honest assessments about the actions and competence of his crew. I expected nothing less from a man of Captain Casey's reputation, and received blunt, honest, and highly accurate reports."

"What we did not expect was the secondary result of his presence at House 29. Leadership at 29 had permitted a culture of hazing and inappropriate behavior to develop and flourish. Photos were taken, some of them you may have seen, some of them you have not, without Captain Casey's permission, and without his knowledge. He was not the only person in the house to have that happen to them." Grissom paused for just a moment. "I will not share any personal details about his reports with you. I did want this house to be aware that as of the start of this shift, Battalion Chief Janet Gayan has been removed from her position and pending the results of her hearing, will be stripped of her rank and removed from the CFD. She was complicit in the dissemination of those photos both on social media and via email. Her removal will of course become common knowledge in the ranks soon enough. I expect this house to be absolutely silent on any role of Captain Casey in this situation. Chief Boden, I leave the rest of this in your capable hands." Grissom left, leaving a somewhat stunned group in the room. Sylvie was just grateful no one turned to stare at Matt. Chief Boden moved to the center of the room, giving them a moment to process what they'd heard.

"I expect this house to do its utmost to keep Casey's name out of anyone's mouths in regards to this situation. The reason for Gayan's removal will be public information. His name, and the names of any other victims of the situation at 29, will not be. It is no one's business outside of this house. I understand that initially we would have been told nothing at all, but due to the email issue last week, some explanation was deemed necessary. Captain Casey may have to be absent from shift a few times during the coming months as part of the criminal investigations that are arising from the internal investigations. You will, all of you, keep your mouths shut." Boden's tone brooked no questions and no opposition. Everyone agreed, though, and this time, Herrmann did turn to face Matt.

"We got your back, Casey." Matt just nodded in response.

"Now, on to today's shift." Boden started the actual daily briefing. Sylvie snuck a few looks at Matt. She wasn't imagining how close Kelly was standing. Their shoulders were touching, and even with both of them facing Chief and paying attention to his words, it was obvious that it was the Matt-Kelly equivalent of an arm around his shoulders.

She waited until the next night to ask Matt anything else about his time up at 29. She thought maybe, with the investigation wrapping up and some of it, at least, out and public knowledge, he might be more willing to talk about what happened, what he'd reported, what he'd gone through up there, because she knew it wasn't as cut-and-dried as those photos (though that was awful enough, that had happened at the end, it didn't explain everything she'd noticed before that).

"Matt, you know you can tell me anything." They were in bed, cuddling. She was trying to ignore the fact that they hadn't had sex since before those photos were emailed out. He wasn't quite acting normally even at home, barely stripping off even to shower. It was probably perfectly normal for him to be reluctant to be naked anywhere, but she felt awful about it.
"It's…I have a lot of baggage. I warned you, I told you, the aesthetics aren't bad, but the structure is a mess."
"And I told you, I always liked fixer-uppers better anyway, they have more character."

"I don't want to be comparing you to… or expecting you…to be…to other relationships."

"But you can't help doing it anyway, can you?" Sylvie wasn't happy about it, but she'd figured it would happen. He wasn't comparing like it was a competition, he was just expecting certain things from her based on conditioning from previous life experience. She understood it, but that didn't mean she had to like it. "No matter what, Matt, I am on your side. I am 'Team Matt Casey' always, 100 percent. So is Kelly, by the way."
"I know that. Intellectually, I know that. I just, it's hard to trust. Sev, most of the time, he's got so much going on I can't add more to him. He's already been more than generous letting me live here this long."
"Don't make that a sacrifice for him. He likes having you here, Matt. He likes to know you're not alone. Just like you did, after Shay died, you wanted to know and you wanted him to know, he wasn't alone, right?"

"Shay was his 'team' – Andy and me, too, of course, but we had steady girls, Andy had a family, Shay was his…more than a sister. Shay was Shay." Matt pulled her tighter to his chest. "I wish you could've met her, or that you could've come to the house even without…if Gabby had become a firefighter and you and Shay could've worked together. That would've been, yeah, dangerous for Chicago, but great for me. And Kelly."
"I wish I'd known her, and Darden. He's always sounded like a great guy."
"He was, one of the best. He was like Mouch, though, content to be a guy on a truck for his whole career – he didn't really understand why Severide and I wanted all the stress and responsibility of being an officer." She felt Matt kiss the top of her head. "Please don't…don't take this personally. I love you. I trust you. I just have so much crap and it messes my head up sometimes."

"We all have 'crap' we carry, Matt. All I need is for you to talk to me. I want to listen. I want to know what happened to you. I mean, about anything, not just what happened at 29."
"You met Chief Gayan a couple times. What did you think?"
"I didn't think much in the hospital room, except that it was weird she called you 'Matthew' which I don't think anyone does. You never use it except on legal papers. At the gala, I don't know, I just remember thinking she was trying to steal you away, and I didn't like her. And her husband was sort of strange."
"Keen took that picture the first week I was up there. I wrote him up. It was a stupid juvenile bit of hazing that any decent officer would've stamped out years ago – it's guaranteed to eventually result in a lawsuit. I swear, I watched him delete the picture from his phone, and I wrote him up, thought it was over."
"But it showed up again."
"I didn't know that until that Facebook mess." Matt sighed. "Keen wasn't a problem after that. He's a decent firefighter, but he needs to grow up past the age of 13. Any shift with a woman on it, I wouldn't let him near."
"But, Chief Gayan runs his shift."
"You think she cares if he's harassing people?" Matt scoffed. "You know how that photo got out? IAD told me. When I wrote him up, she called him into her office, made him give her his phone each shift, said he couldn't be trusted."
"That's…almost reasonable."
"She took the photo off his phone, he hadn't actually deleted it, had some stupid 'prank' planned to make it the wallpaper on my phone or something, just my phone. Stupid, juvenile shit, but…she, she took it because she wanted it. You know who sent that email? Her husband. He set up the stupid Facebook thing, too."
"Wait, she shared that with her husband?"
"Oh, I already knew they have an 'open marriage'." Matt sighed heavily. "The investigators said she had little cameras in the showers and locker-room. I wasn't the only guy with pictures taken. I wasn't even the only guy she approached about…over-time activities."
"She seriously propositioned you?" She popped up a little bit, angling so she could see his face.
"Not even subtly."

"She was trying to get you transferred permanently so she could, what, pressure you into having sex with her?"
"Yeah, that's a good summary."

"Wow. That…I'm sorry, baby." She kissed him softly, then settled back down against his chest. She was cozy, and kind of considered it her spot, on her side and curled into him, his left arm wrapped around her and her head on his chest above his heart.

"She always wanted to meet alone. It started with her hand on my arm, or my shoulder, weird but…some people are touchy. By the second week, hand on my knee started sliding up from there. I wrote it up. District chief said I was being too sensitive to her gentler, more sensitive, more feminine style of communication."
"I don't think her hand on your thigh is more feminine at all. It's just invasive."

"My third week up there, I was in the middle of a shower – house fire, practically hoarders, there was so much crap burning in that house, it was pitch black and then we had to do overhaul, I think I had soot in places I didn't know I had places, and that was with my gear on – she said she had a question about an incident report I'd written. Came into the showers, opened the curtain, and just asked me about this incident report like we were in the common room."
"She walked in on you in the shower?"
"Was weird as hell, and humiliating, and got better: I answered her question, and she looked down, said 'good to see you're really a blond', before she walked off."
"Oh my god, Matt, that is…why didn't you say anything?"
"I wrote it up." Matt replied. "District chief said I was only complaining because she's a woman, if it had been a male battalion chief, it would've just been fine. He couldn't take action on a sexist complaint."
"Wait, he said you were being sexist by complaining that she commented on your pubic hair while walking into your shower?"
"Two more times I wrote her up for things – she came into the locker-room while I was changing and insisted on talking while I changed out, and she slapped my ass at a call – both times, came back with the same response: if she was a man, I wouldn't complain, so it was dead in the water."
"That makes no sense. You would totally complain if Chief did those things, not that he ever would."
"Actually, I have changed out with Boden right there." Matt shrugged. "But it is different when it's a woman, and a woman who has propositioned me."
"She did that sort of stuff the whole time you were there?"
"It was mostly comments, and her hands constantly on me, even in kind of innocuous ways. It's not innocuous anymore once she says she wants to ride you until you pop like a champagne cork."
"Wow, that's…brazen."
"I pointed out she was married. You know what she said? Her husband wanted to join."
"What?!"

"Yep. She wanted me to have sex with her and her husband. All I could think about was how many weeks I had left until I was back at 51. My incident reports were all accurate, but I couldn't, I didn't know how to even lodge a complaint about…and what if I got the same response again? That I was too sensitive. That I was being sexist. That it wasn't a big deal. That it was just 'her way of trying to be personable.' That it wasn't personal, it was just her way in general."
"No one's way is like that. If it is, they should be banned from working with humans."
"I didn't know how you'd take it. We'd just started, really, and I didn't want you to think…I'd never, but I didn't want you to get upset."
"At her, oh, I'm upset. At you, why would I get upset?"
"I don't know. I must've flirted with her or something. I don't know. Some sort of signal that I was okay with her walking in on my showers."
"She did that more than once?"
"Twice more. Second time she just asked her questions and left. Third time, she actually…" Matt stopped, taking a deep breath. "That was just before Thanksgiving. She grabbed my ass. I didn't take another shower at 29 after that."

"Matt…"
"I didn't write her up again." Matt pulled her tightly against him again. "Every shift it was something. Her hands wandered. The guys on my shift thought we were sleeping together, that that was why I'd come in for Polanshek. I just spent as much time as I could in my quarters, door shut. I didn't know what else to do."
"So you think she escalated when you were getting ready to leave because she hadn't gotten her way?"
"No, I think, well the investigators think, it was meeting you. Who I introduced as my girlfriend. It seems like the Facebook thing was intended to get you to dump me. They didn't count on my aversion to social media being a giveaway to you that it wasn't me at all."

"You telling me that if you were single, you would have-"
"Yeah." His answer was so blatantly sarcastic, she had to chuckle.
"And the email?"
"Pure spite. Pretending to be a girl I'd slept with in the house just to make me look bad - it wasn't even believable, it was stupid and petty." Sylvie thought cruel was a better word to describe it, but she also thought that Janet Gayan and her husband were probably awful, cruel, miserable, vicious human beings. They had to be.
"You know she assaulted you, Matt, don't you? She put her hands on you for sexual gratification against your will. That's sexual assault. Are they charging her with that?"
"Her husband, Sylvie, is Terry Anderson. He's a major political donor and ridiculously wealthy. No, no one is charging her, or her husband with anything like sexual assault. They'll probably find a way to plea down the revenge porn thing, but there'll be charges of some sort for sure, I'm told. Plus she loses her job, so she can't cultivate that…situation again."
"So what happened to you matters less than the fact that he's rich and influential. Sometimes, I hate this whole world."
"I'm okay, Sylvie. I just need to adjust to being back at 51. I'm safe there, I know that. It's just gonna take me some time to get used to working in a safe place again."

"Whatever you need. Just know that I love you, and I'm here. For cuddles, or listening, or whatever you need."

She took his tightened arms as acknowledgement. She had wanted to know what he'd gone through, and she was glad he finally opened up, even if she knew he had simplified and probably taken some of the worst edges off, because that's just who Matt Casey was – he wouldn't want her to feel bad or worry about him. He always had to be the strong one, the one that kept it together. He was so controlled so much of the time. God, how much it must have scared him, hurt him, to have felt out of control of his own…his own body in some ways, up there. Sylvie was not naturally a particularly violent or aggressive person, but oh, given the chance she would hurt anyone who hurt him. Sometimes, Matt wouldn't defend himself because, well maybe because Kelly had been right and Matt just didn't think he was worth defending. She thought differently. He was one of the best men, best people, she'd ever met and if she wasn't capable of hurting whoever hurt Matt, then she'd just call Kelly, and Stella, and Herrmann, and Chief, and whoever she needed to, right up to Sergeant Voight if she had to (though Matt would really hate that). He was worth at least a thousand people like Janet Gayan and her awful rich 'important' husband. But for now, she was just going to be happy that he was back at 51, and here with her.