Severus strode out of the Order of the Phoenix's meeting room at 12 Grimmauld Place, clenching his left fist. This summer had been wretched, more so than usual. He almost looked forward to the upcoming school year, despite the things we would have to do.
He shuddered as he thought of the things he would have to do.
Other Order members crowded around him as they too flocked out of the meeting. They formed groups around the parlor, starting their after-meeting social hour. Or hours. Severus couldn't know; he usually left before anyone could even consider the idea of greeting him.
Severus shuddered once again, but this time because he had caught sight of the mutt in his general vicinity. Ugh, and Black was blocking his pathway to the library.
For once, Severus wasn't feeling inclined to bait him. He tried stepping around him, deciding to ignore him, but apparently Black was not feeling inclined to do the same.
"Oi, Snivilous, where are you slithering off to? Don't you want to say hi to your favorite Azkaban escapee?"
Severus opened his mouth to refute him, realized it was true, and instead kept on walking forward. That is, until an arm in front of him impeded his progress.
Severus stopped before he could touch it and whipped his head to the side, giving Black a look of annoyance.
"I will not refrain from severing your arm from your body, Black."
"Aw, there's my vicious little Snapey!"
Severus wished for a moment that the mutt had really been taken by the Dark Lord earlier this year. Though he might be dead in the Department of Mysteries, at least he wouldn't be here, blocking Severus's path. Oh, and now the Potter brat was walking up to them.
"Sirius? What's up?" he asked his dogfather.
"Snape here's really set on getting into the library," Black answered.
"The library?" Potter narrowed his eyes at him. "Oh yeah, you would enjoy taking advantage of my...books."
Severus huffed his annoyance. Potter had learned the true nature of his association with Hermione during an occlumency lesson. Potter had succumbed to Hermione's pleas to secrecy, but that did not mean the boy had forgiven Severus.
Though it distressed Hermione to no end, Severus was admittedly not terribly disappointed. It simply meant he had another thing to taunt Potter with.
"Considering I saved you from falling into the Dark Lord's trap with help from one of your books, I believe the right is well-earned, is it not?" Severus retorted silkily.
Potter looks mutinous and Black looked about to say something, but Severus plowed past the both of them, lips pulled into a smirk.
Upon hearing voices in the library, however, his smirk distorted as he ground his teeth beneath it. Another delay in talking to his Hermione?
"...must be done, Miss Granger," came the unexpected voice of Albus Dumbledore.
"But just what have you asked of him? The way he looked the last time I saw him, I can tell he does not want to do it."
"It's true, you have made things more complicated." Severus could hear Albus's solemn gaze. "You have given him a reason to live."
"And that's a bad thing?" Hermione sneered. "Are you going to take me away from him, then? Just because it's bloody inconvenient to—"
"No—love is never a bad thing."
The silence afterwards was too much for Severus to bear. He glid into the room a little more agitated than he would have liked.
"I would rather certain secrets not be flaunted so carelessly," he hissed. "And I will be having words with you, Miss Granger."
"Do not be too harsh on your Hermione, Severus," advised Albus with a twinkle in his eye. "Indeed, I was the one who brought it up."
Severus glared at the Headmaster. What was the old man playing at?
Before Severus could tell him to get get out of the library, Albus was saying, "I shall afford the two of you some privacy, then." He even closed the door on his way out.
He flung up the required privacy spells, and in less than a moment Severus rounded on Hermione.
However she spoke first: "I wonder what the Headmaster was thinking! He didn't even put up any privacy spells." She shared a meaningful gaze with him. "Do you think he did it on purpose?"
It was good; Severus almost fell for it. Almost.
"Oh, very good, Hermione," he cackled. "Attempting to divert my anger? I see some of my Slytherin tendencies have rubbed off on you."
"Severus I—"
"Pathetic attempts to distract me aside, I thought I had told you to leave the issue of my task well alone," he hissed.
"Severus, I was trying to help!" she appealed.
"By going behind my back and breaking my trust?"
"Stop it! You won't guilt me away again. Maybe the way I was trying to help wasn't the best, but Severus!" She looked at him with pleading eyes. "I saw the way you looked when we last met. There was so obviously something wrong, so wrong that you couldn't hide it."
"There was a reason I asked you not to pry," he growled.
"I wish you would trust me enough to tell me."
"Ha, trust? It's likely just your pathological need to know everything."
She looked stricken, like she had not considered that possibility before. Severus felt mirthless satisfaction. But then she looked determined. "No, that's not what I'm doing. I'm not prying into your secrets just to fill my curiosity. Give me some credit Severus."
"Is that so?" Severus said skeptically. "Why, then? Why does it matter to you so much to find out, pray tell?"
Hermione looked hesitant, like he had caught her out on a lie. But then she looked up, and the glint in her eye should have warned him enough what she was going to say.
"Because I care for you, I want to help you because I love you."
The little hesitant hope she had in her eyes slowly died when he did not anything back immediately.
"The Headmaster has been filling your head with foolish ideas," he said stiffly.
Hermione clenched her jaw and gave him a look a great pain. Scrunching her eyes closed, she took a deep breath; and when opened them again they were filled with resignation. "Maybe we should break up."
"What?" he yelped.
"That is, if we were ever together in the first place."
"Hermione—"
"Have I been reading into this—into us—more than I should have? Our meetings during fifth year, our letters over the summer...were they just gestures of friendship?"
Severus couldn't help it; he let out an incredulous laugh. And before Hermione could start to look too irate, he pulled her into an embrace.
"Silly girl, you know I consider you more than a friend." He cleared his throat. "I care for you very much...more than anything else in the world."
"Do you love me?" she gazed up at him with large eyes, brown and doe-like.
Oh Merlin. Distracted by their intellectual discussions, the way she had approached their relationship with such confidence, and her quiet strength though the world fell apart around them, he had forgotten how young and vulnerable she was.
He gripped her tighter as he murmured in her hair. "I may, in the future."
Severus was pleased to feel some of her familiar resolve seep back into her stance. "Then that's enough for me."
As they stood there, amongst the books and cracking fire, Severus found himself wondering about love. What did he know about love? He had precious little experience with it in his life.
What was love, anyway? A feeling? A whim?
A choice?
Severus looked down at the girl he held in his arms. He had chosen her, hadn't he? He had chosen to be with her, to protect her, to care for her.
He felt a rush of affection and such a feeling of contentment come over him. He knew he would choose to do anything for her.
Yes, he certainly could learn to love her.
Maybe...he already did.
He leaned his face close to hers, and that on that warm July evening in the library, Hermione Granger and Severus Snape shared their second kiss.
"And an old man cackled in meddlesome satisfaction."
Thank you to everyone who stuck by, as this is my first fanfiction of significant length. (Which was also why the writing was so slow-going heh)
I've had this idea for a fic in my head for a year by now, and it's so good to finally see it completed. However, I plan to write more SSHG in the future. So I hope to see you all again!
