Chapter 13

BPOV

I stirred from my sleep, opening my eyes slowly and stretching my arms above my head before noticing that Edward's side of the bed was empty. I glanced around the room, not seeing him or hearing anyone in the bathroom.

As I sat up, I heard the lock on the door click, and it swung open as Edward walked into the room. His hands were full, so he had his cellphone pressed between his ear and shoulder.

"Yeah, okay, I understand. Thanks," he spoke softly before noticing I was awake. "Alright. Thanks again, Marcus," he said as he hung up.

Immediately, my heart was in my throat, wanting to know what they'd discussed.

"Morning, baby." He placed the bags he'd been juggling on top of the dresser, along with his phone, then kicked his shoes off. He climbed on the bed next to me, kissing my lips sweetly. "I got us bagels. I got a whole shitload since I don't know if you have any cravings—fuck, do you even want bagels? I'll—"

"I want to know what Marcus said, Edward."

Sighing, he ran his hand through his hair. "I'll have a new assistant by tomorrow night before we head out. I explained about everything; what Jane said to you, the whole airport thing. Marcus agreed it was unacceptable and unprofessional."

"Thank you for taking care of that."

"I really wish you'd told me what she said to you earlier."

I glared at him. "So the other times she made me feel uncomfortable weren't valid enough? She walked in on us with your dick in my mouth!"

"Anyone could have walked in on us. I didn't lock the door. I'm not saying those times weren't valid, but if you'd told me she said those things…"

"You would have what? Written me off like you keep doing?"

For a moment, he sat there just staring at me. "What the hell are you talking about? I keep writing you off?"

"Let's see, all of a sudden you get your dream, and then my dream of having a baby—which you wanted as well—is suddenly put on hold."

"Because I want to be around for your pregnancy. I want to watch them take their first breath, hear their first word! And now?" He threw his hands in the air. "You'll go to all your doctor's appointments alone. I won't get to feel them kick for the first time—"

"I'm sorry my timing of becoming pregnant is so horrible."

"Stop twisting my words. That's not what I'm saying at all!" he shouted, causing me to recoil. "Goddamnit, Isabella! If you think for one second that I don't want this baby, you're fucking insane! Or have you forgotten I was there for every negative pregnancy test? I held you every time you sobbed when you thought you were pregnant and weren't. Do you know how many times I cried, or how hard it was to watch you fall apart?"

I felt tears welling up in my eyes as he spoke. "Edward, I—"

"No, let me finish. If you think I'm not ecstatic about this baby and scared shitless of missing everything, you're wrong."

"I love you, Edward, but you don't get to say sweet words and think it'll fix everything. It still really sucked to have to worry about telling you when I wanted to scream it from the rooftops. And then I felt like my voice didn't matter when someone was making me uncomfortable. You've never not listened to my concerns before."

He gripped me by the waist, pulling me onto his lap. "I'm sorry. I can't take back anything, but I am sorry. I wasn't listening like I should've been, but my mind is clouded and I feel as if I'm being pulled in so many directions. It's such a rush being out here, playing for hundreds of people almost every night, but then I feel like I'm not supposed to be enjoying it, that you'll be upset that I'm having a good time."

I pulled back, staring at him. "Are you serious? You seem to be enjoying it enough to not call me for a week, or to go out drinking well into the morning when you knew I'd be here the next day. Tell me, how many of your beautiful fans bought you drinks the other night, Edward? Did you sign anyone's tits?" I climbed off his lap. "I told Rose we'd have lunch with her since we're in town, but I think I'm going to go alone. I'll see you tonight, I guess." I walked into the bathroom, letting the door slam behind me.

—BtMO—

"Bella!" Rose wrapped me in a tight hug as soon as she saw me. "You look—well, you kind of look like shit, girl."

"Your honesty is refreshing, Rose," I deadpanned.

She gripped my hand, pulling me into the restaurant. "I expected you to be glowing from having reunited with your man. Instead, you look like he gave you a puppy and then kicked it. Where is Edward, anyway?"

I shrugged. "Back at the hotel, rehearsal, I don't know."

She stared at me. "Oh, Bella, what's going on?" All it took was that question for me to burst into tears. "Come on, let's go back to my place and talk."

"I'm sorry—"

"Shush. Let's go."

—BtMO—

"Bella, you're pregnant," Rose sobbed, pulling me against her. She was the only person who understood my heartache all the months we were trying. She'd unexpectedly become pregnant in our junior year of college, and instead of being terrified, she'd been excited to be a mom. She had loved that baby from the moment she'd known they existed. If there was anyone on this earth that was meant to be a mother, it was Rose, but for reasons unknown, she'd miscarried when she was about a month along.

"Listen to me, Bella. You can't let all this other stuff get in the way of being happy, of celebrating the little baby you're carrying. I'm not saying to let Edward walk all over you, you still need to call him out on his shit, but you told me he said he's happy!"

"But he'll be gone for most of—"

"There are other ways to involve him. Pictures, video chats. You have enough of a cushion now that he can fly back to see you when there's a short break, or you to him. Make it work. You told me he didn't call you for a week, but is there a reason you didn't call him? Last I remembered, phones work both ways." She rolled her eyes at me.

"I feel like I don't belong in this world sometimes."

"I'm not writing off your feelings when I say this, okay?" I nodded so she'd continue. "But, that is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. There's nowhere else you belong than beside him, and him beside you. You've had a nice, long stretch of never being without the other, so how about instead of letting the distance destroy you, let it strengthen you. You think he's not hearing you? Then fucking yelland scream until he does. It's time you stop standing in the corner."

"I do not—" I began, but she leveled me with a glare.

"Take what you need from him, Bella. You know he's more than willing to give you what you want, but you have to open your mouth and tell him everything."

I sat there for a minute, letting her words float around in my head until it suddenly clicked. "You're right," I said with newfound confidence.


What you think about what Rose had to say?