Happy
Elsa is feeling much better after shaking off her mild illness from Anna's nineteenth birthday party. She can finally breathe through her nose again, and that awful dizziness has subsided. For all intents and purposes, she should be back to her normal self.
There's just one thing that's bothering her; why was Anna surprised when she was told it was her birthday? It was not possible that she didn't know; it occurs on the day of the summer solstice each year. Anna can be forgetful to a fault, but there's no way she'd forget her own birthday.
Honestly, the question had been plaguing Elsa's mind since that morning, when Anna jolted out of bed, honestly surprised that the day of her birth was of such importance. It was such a simple question, 'It's my birthday?', but Elsa has been starved for answers for the past week.
The queen decides she will ask Anna today. When she asks what Anna wants to do, having allotted half the day just for her, she shrugs and says 'whatever you want, it'll be fun no matter what.' The queen meekly suggests a simple walk in the woods, as she really has no better ideas. Her confidence returns when Anna nods with an enthusiastic grin. They take two canteens of water and some snacks, then head out to one of the many forests surrounding the fjord.
"It's so relaxing out here," Elsa shuts her eyes and lets the wind tousle her loose hair. She almost never wears it down in public, but out here, she feels secure.
"I gotta say, it really is," Anna's grin reaches both ears, watching her sister soak in all that nature had to offer. "I didn't know you were so fond of the outdoors."
"I think I've always loved the idea of it, but now that I'm here, it's so...I can't explain it."
Anna giggles, earning a suspicious glare.
"I'm sorry, I'm not making fun, I promise," the princess clarifies. "It's just so nice to see you look so...happy."
Happy. It's a strange word for Elsa. She can't honestly say that she ever truly felt happy. Content, maybe. The closest she gets to happy is when she is with Anna.
"Kind of reminds me of that scavenger hunt on my birthday. You looked so excited, just like a little kid," Anna fondly recalls. "It's good to see you relax a little. You worry me sometimes."
"That reminds me. Anna, I actually wanted to ask you something," Elsa decides she might as well dive in.
"Is everything okay?"
The immediate concern in the redhead's tone worries Elsa, in turn. Anna spends so much energy being concerned about her, she doesn't think of herself.
"Y–yes, everything is fine," Elsa tries to give an encouraging smile. "It's actually about your birthday."
"Elsa, I already told you, you didn't ruin anything, how many times-"
"No, no! It's not that."
Anna can't help a confused expression.
"Okay. So...what is it?"
"Anna, did you really not know it was your birthday?"
Elsa's heart falls as Anna's expression flattens. She looks away guiltily.
"Anna?"
"Look, if I tell you this, you have to promise me you won't feel responsible," the princess sends a pleading glance.
"Responsible for what?"
"The...the reason I didn't celebrate it."
Elsa already has half an idea, and the further her heart falls, the sicker she feels.
"You never celebrated it?"
"Elsa, please, you're doing it again," Anna reaches for her sister's hands. "You're supposed to be relaxing."
"Did Mama and Papa do something for you, at least?"
The queen only refers to their parents with those titles when they are alone. It sends a warm, fuzzy sensation through the princess.
"Yeah, a cake. You know, basic birthday stuff. But it was more of an excuse to eat cake than anything else," Anna admits with the beginnings of a fond grin on her face. "If you weren't there to celebrate with me, what was the point?"
'What was the point?' The question echoes in Elsa's mind.
"Anna-"
"No."
Elsa reels back, confused.
"No what?"
"You're going to beat yourself up over something that's long past," Anna says through narrowed eyes.
Elsa refuses to admit her sister is right, but her lack of an answer doesn't help her case, either.
"I want to try something. Close your eyes," Anna requests in her gentle, but authoritarian tone of voice.
Baffled, but willing to comply, Elsa shuts her eyes.
"Okay, now what?"
"Listen to everything going on around you," the princess instructs.
Elsa listens to the wind whistle through the trees. She listens to the birds call out to one another. She listens to the cicadas singing their mating song. The dawn of a smile appears on her face. It only grows when Anna's arms wind around Elsa's neck.
"How do you feel right now?"
"Like...nothing can go wrong," the queen answers honestly. "Everything feels right."
"That's exactly how you make me feel. That's how I felt on my nineteenth birthday, it's how I feel every day that I can spend by your side," Anna nuzzles her face into Elsa's. "It doesn't matter that I didn't have that feeling back then, because I have it now."
Without permission, Elsa opens her eyes, now glowing with all the affection and admiration she can project in a single glance. Anna doesn't seem to mind that Elsa didn't wait for a cue.
"I didn't care about my birthday before because you weren't a part of it. Even if we had some kind of party, it wouldn't have been the same as it is now, because there was still that distance. We don't have that distance anymore."
When did Anna learn to pluck at Elsa's heartstrings so easily?
"I don't mean to, I guess it just happens."
Elsa claps a hand to her mouth, then dares a sidelong glance at Anna.
"Yes, you did say that out loud," the princess giggles.
Though Elsa's face is buried in her palm, Anna knows she's smiling by the height of her cheekbones.
