"If I can't kick you out, I'll kick your stupid face in."
Gavin was not in the mood for Nines' explanation bullshit. No amount of explaining could fix or help whatever the hell happened back at the hotel, and how suspicious Nines was. The uncanny timing, followed by the attack - then Gavin remembered how there was a remote with a button that had caused Nines to become a mindless killing machine. Did they end up grabbing that? Oh well, doesn't matter.
"You cannot keep ignoring me, and please don't threaten me. You have to listen to me some time," Nines said.
"Do I?"
"If you actually loved me, then you would have listened by now!" Nines yelled.
Gavin fell silent as the emotional words echoed throughout the room. It dawned on him how unfair to Nines he had been, and that maybe he should listen to what he has to say. It certainly showed a lack of love and trust that Gavin wouldn't listen to whatever explanation had.
But Gavin was stubborn. "Fuck off, robot."
The cold, snarky tone behind the words seemed to have pierced Nines. He suddenly looked completely and utterly done with Gavin's bullshit. With persistence, he insisted with clear impatience, "Gavin, listen to what I have to say."
Another prolonged silence fell throughout the room. Gavin broke the crushing silence and thick tension by saying, "Fine then." He crossed his arms over his chest and raised an eyebrow expectantly. "Go ahead. Baffle me with your explanation."
"Thank you. I'm glad that you finally decided to agree." Nines took a deep breath, as if preparing himself mentally to speak, and he looked seriously into Gavin's expectant eyes. "The second time that I snuck back to the building you were kept in, my superiors had suspected that I was up to something - and swiftly figured it out that I was associated with the disappearance of yourself and Connor," Nines began, delving directly into an explanation. "Instead of going through normal punishment protocols by killing me and hunting down and killing yourself and Connor, they decided to do an experiment. An experiment they had not yet the opportunity to do, until this incident happened."
Oh damn. Out of everything that could have happened, Gavin never speculated that Nines - someone with such a high social status - could be the subject in an experiment. "Go on."
"They took me to a lab and deceived me into thinking I was just to take care of android experiments, like the ones found in the tunnels." The memories of the experiments made Gavin shudder as Nines continued to speak. "I was led to an area where they connected me to some wiring, flipped a switch, and I could feel. Not emotionally - I can already do that, but I could completely physically feel - and by that, I mean I was injected with synthetic agony. I couldn't escape. I was laughed at as I writhed and screamed my anguish. Then, the wiring filled me with rage. They disconnected me and the anger remained. I didn't feel like myself."
"That's why you got more aggressive randomly," Gavin breathed out. He imagined Nines being attached to some crazy-scientist-esque machine, writhing and kicking as he was flooded with a new yet horrible sensation. As a human, he had no idea what it would be like experiencing pain for the first time ever - especially not excruciating pain."Why didn't you tell me?"
"I'm getting to that. I had to return to continue deceiving the majority of the android population, and on top of that, my superiors threatened to kill you and Connor if I told or even hinted what was happening to either of you - and Hank, once they found out about him. All of my rage was never me, and no matter how much I wanted to tell you that, I just couldn't. Every time I returned, they worked on my wiring and my code more, changing it slowly to meet their twisted goals. I would be told when to return because they had something new to work on me with, and I could only resist for so long. I always knew our android government had corruptions, but I never realised how severe it truly is. Our leader is someone who has changed, someone who wasn't like this when this whole thing began. And then when this android turned towards a path of tyranny, they were supported by androids seeking revenge upon the human race."
The name of the revolution leader was at the tip of Gavin's tongue, but he didn't quite remember. He did know that the deviant leader was somehow associated with Elijah Kamski, maybe Connor had casually mentioned something one day. Gavin couldn't recall. Either way, simply remembering the name Elijah Kamski made his stomach churn.
"So the leader of the androids is fucked up. We been knew. Continue."
"Precisely. The androids conducting the experiment quickly switched to mind controlling me, which they succeeded - they created a special device that, if a button was pressed, my primary objective would be activated in my code - kill Gavin and then anyone associated with him."
"So, if Hank and Connor and Aspen weren't able to do whatever they did to stop the mind or code control or whatever, you…"
"Would've killed them all after getting rid of you," Nines confirmed.
Gavin bowed his head guiltily as he absorbed the entirety of this information. It was hard to take in. This whole time Nines was suffering, and Gavin was so deep within himself that he didn't even bother to take a look at Nines and recognise the true suffering he was experiencing.. "Nines, I… I'm so sorry. I should've talked to you sooner, I should've supported you through this time of sorrow and regret."
"I am fully aware that you're damaged and a snappy person, Gavin," Nines reassured gently. "This added trauma and distrust is completely okay after what I had done to you, even if I didn't mean it. I just hope you find it within your beating human heart to forgive me."
"Forgive you? Oh Nines, I'm the one who should be apologizing!" After speaking, Gavin ran forward to his boyfriend and pulled him into a tight hug. "I'm so sorry I didn't listen to you sooner. I love you so much."
Nines' arms went around Gavin, pulling him closer to his body as they began to embrace sweetly. Gavin's head fell on Nines' chest.
"I love you too," Nines said. "Deciding to have a romantic relationship may have gone much worse, depending on the circumstances, but… It hurt so much. Sometimes I wonder if I should have denied my attraction to you at all, and left you where this all began - that building. You would've been safer and less prone to getting what could potentially be fatal injuries there."
Gavin felt Nines' head nuzzling into his hair. It ached to imagine a life without Nines by his side, a life he would spend the remainder of suffering a fate that no one had ever deserved.
"Don't say that," Gavin said softly. "You freed me from a horrible life. I'd rather be here, as free as we can manage to be, than wondering day by day what I will have to do and what my fate will be. It was such a tedious stream of endless days, yet so frightening as I didn't know what could really happen."
"But it's the same here, is it not?" Nines pointed out. "In a place such as this, things could turn out to be tragic - again. You are fully aware of what happened to the last location of Hu- Verum. Life in general is a constant plunge into the unknown. If we had just remained in that building, keeping our emotional distance, things may have been better."
"Do you regret us ever being a thing? Because I feel like that's kind of what you're hinting at here."
"Gavin, I-"
"You were treated so royalty, so you have no idea what the mental strain was like. I was deprived of the things I, as a human, needed to live. But yeah, things were safe there for me, weren't they?" Gavin spat, his sarcastic words laced with venom. He forcefully broke the hug, and took a defensive step backwards. "I don't get you, Nines. You regret what we have but you don't want to hurt me."
"I could say the same things about you," Nines retorted.
"Oh yeah, definitely! All I've tried to do is love you."
"And that showed so well when you shut me out and wouldn't let me tell you the reasonings for something I did that was not my fault."
"I was fucking traumatised Nines, it's not that simple!"
Nines' irritated face quickly turned into one of remorse and sorrow. He sat on Gavin's bed, seeming to defeatedly deflate. Gavin watched with a cocked eyebrow.
"Gavin, what are we doing?" He asked quietly. "We aren't meant to be fighting like this."
Gavin's countenance fell too. He took a seat on his bed, right next to Nines, and he leaned against him. Gavin rested his head on Nines' shoulder, and he felt Nines' head rest on his. Gavin reached over and grabbed Nines' hand, interlacing their fingers.
"Nines, I'm sorry," Gavin said. There wasn't a drop of arrogance in his words - his worse were true and pure. Gavin felt genuine regret and sadness right down to his core. What was the use of these fights? Nines and Gavin had landed in paradise, it wasn't fair on each other to create these seemingly endless and exceedingly hurtful battles.
"I forgive you. You have my deepest apologies, too," Nines said.
"It's okay." Gavin couldn't fight back a small smile. "We speak so differently. You're all proper and mature, while I speak like a teen sailor."
Nines cracked a small grin of his own. "Gavin, at heart, you are nothing but a teenage sailor. It was your true calling, but alas, you are a person who pursued the path of a police detective instead. Such a pity, and such a disappointment to what you could've been."
"Shut the fuck up," Gavin said light-heartedly. "Anyways, here's a concept: We go look at the sunset."
"Concept agreed with and accepted. First, finish your pasta. You need food."
Gavin playfully rolled his eyes. He picked up his bowl of pasta and scarfed about two thirds of it down. After he finished, he burped and then said, "I'm full."
"You certainly seemed to enjoy that pasta," Nines commented with amusement.
"It was amazing and I wish I could finish it. Now let's go! Carry me."
"That was what I was planning to do," Nines said. "But I suggest you bring that pasta downstairs with you. We can make a stop in the kitchen."
"Okay dad," Gavin sarcastically said. He picked up the bowl of pasta, carefully cradling it like a child. Nines picked Gavin up, supporting him by putting one hand on his ass and one hand on his back.
"Okay, I have two comments here," Gavin said. "One, it's hard to carry the pasta like this. Two, haha you're touching my ass that's gay."
"Gavin," Nines started with a deadpan expression, "We are males who are in a relationship, and who love each other. We have literally had intercourse."
"Yeah, that makes it gay. This is just another gay thing."
Nines opened his mouth before shutting it said. Then he said, "You do have a point and you are certainly not incorrect."
"Cool. Now let's go," Gavin said. As Nines left the room and made his way towards the stairs, Gavin was cautiously balancing the pasta as best as he could manage. They made it to the kitchen where Gavin returned the leftovers, and he had a drink then went to the bathroom. Then, Gavin and Nines headed outside, and Gavin and Nines sat on the grass. The sun was setting. The ball of fiery gas was slipping slowly past the treeline, illuminating the sky a mix of oranges, yellows, pinks, blues and purples. Like usual, it was gorgeous. Gavin wished he looked at the natural beauty more often.
"The sunset is so beautiful," Gavin said. He learned against Nines and stared up at the sky.
"Not as beautiful as you are," Nines said endearingly.
"Aw. That's so cliché and gay. Clichgay."
"An excellent word," Nines said. He said in a very robotic tone, "New word added to vocabulary: Clichgay, a term coined by Gavin Reed. A colloquial adjective and a combination of the words cliché and gay. Definition: A cliché, most likely romantic, said in a homosexual manner, relationship or implication." Nines suddenly looked embarrassed. "Oops. I was not meant to say that aloud."
Gavin started laughing. "Do you do that in your head every time I come up with random shit?"
"Yes," Nines said. "But it happens so naturally I barely notice as I register them. I am not sure what happened there."
Gavin laughed more, but he eventually reduced his laughter and turned to a more serious matter. "Nines. I forgot to ask you before, is your tracker something the superiors or whoever can access?"
His eyes went dark. "They used to," Nines said carefully, "But I damaged my tracker beyond repair after the hotel incident. I just pray they cannot figure out the location of Verum."
Gavin nodded, and his mind raced back to the fight he had with Nines. Despite how recent it was, the argument was a thing of the past. But then Nines' words rang in his head, even if they were related to a joking matter.
Such a disappointment to what you could've been.
Gavin remembered the weird dream nightmare thing that he had had. Had the argument and resolution hindered or influenced any of those paths of rushing water? Any decision, whether big or small, would change the course of where the water was flowing, wouldn't it?
What if I'm going towards one of the stormy paths, one that is inevitably clouded with nothing but darkness? Have I been making the right choices? Gavin thought, his anxiety spiking.
"It's not real," Gavin told himself aloud. This gained him a look of concern from Nines.
"What's not real? Are you okay?" he asked.
"It's nothing," Gavin said dismissively. "I don't want to talk about it."
Nines held a gentle gaze with Gavin for a few moments, and Gavin felt himself faltering. Those icy blue eyes always managed to pierce into Gavin's soul, and he felt like he was being swept off his feet whenever he saw them. Those same blue eyes, that same face, those safe arms that Gavin could nearly call home.
Home is with you.
A sense of clarity washed over Gavin. Wherever Nines was, that's where Gavin felt safest. His home was with Nines. But the clarity soon twisted and his thoughts travelled down a sour path.
"Nines, do you think Verum can exist here in safety forever?" Gavin asked.
"I… No. Sooner or later, this location will be discovered. It's inevitable, and the community will certainly have to evacuate much sooner than they had to when underground."
"Ah… So this place isn't really safe, either."
"It is," Nines corrected, suddenly seeming wiser, "For now. You have access to everything you need, but try not to be fooled by the serenity this place seems to have. The sky may be clear now, but clouds are gathering, and I know that sooner or later a storm will be upon us."
"Then why did we come here?" Gavin asked quietly.
"Because for now, this is the best place to be. But I know my former superiors, and they will do whatever it takes to bring this place down."
"So they definitely know Verum exists."
"Yes, because of the experiments - because of me. But they know it as Human Jericho, which may throw off their path a little longer. I suggest making the best of this luxury you are currently exposed to, until this crumbles too," Nines said. He then added, "I didn't want to drain you of your optimism, which is why I never mentioned this to you."
Gavin nodded. "So everything is a lie but I should take advantage of having everything easy while it lasts. Cool."
"Don't mention it to Connor or Hank. I don't want them to think all of these efforts were for nothing," Nines said.
"I won't, but I think you should. Either way…" Gavin turned to face Nines, and he took Nines' hand in his own. He held a soft, loving eye contact.
"The skies are dark and hope is low, but I know I can do anything by your side."
Nines responded with a gentle smile. He leaned in and kissed Gavin sweetly, with Gavin being swift to return the passionate kiss. They trapped themselves and each other in their embrace and overwhelming love beneath the darkened skies.
