Seriously you all are the best freaking audience ever! I'm prepping this on the 12th proper, so if results come in by the time I post tomorrow (Thursday) I will let you know!
I keep forgetting to mention the last chapter and this one were edited by the lovley Laureninthesky96 :)...Thank you!
I'm just going to take a moment to celebrate my beta-ee's kimmigirl9, Nightbird755 and Mbrook6759...they are amazing, creative individuals and I would love to see their stories get more love. AHH so honored to work them.
Anyway without further adieu...
Natsuki-past
For three weeks the arguments raged. She was being dishonored, humiliated, it wasn't their way. At the bottom of it, she knew what her father was after. She kept her distance from Sesshomaru, only passing Tsukimaru through servants until she couldn't stand it any longer.
It was the middle of the night, the arguments had finally stopped. Sesshomaru adjured Kensaku that he would live with Natsuki at the end of Rin's life and that then and only then they would be together. Kensaku tried to bully Sesshomaru into bedding Natsuki at least once while they were both in the castle. He refused. It didn't bother her. Her time would come.
Of course the entire time the meetings happened, her father insisted they sit next to each other, which meant gentle caresses passed between the two. His finger would brush against her hip by accident when he moved, her elbow pressed into his side if she didn't pay attention. Heat would build between them and no matter how she tried, she couldn't keep her yoki from reaching out to his, and during quiet moments, she could feel his breaching hers.
Natsuki screamed during one meeting that she wasn't suffering, it was her choice. She fought with her father and felt trapped between the two. The only reason her father wanted her to interfere was because of Sesshomaru's barrier made of reiki.
She raises her hand to knock on his door, then stops herself. She raises it again opening her mouth only to close it. Before she can try again, he rips the door open. She's holding Tsukimaru. He's her peace offering, a pathetic hope that he won't turn her away. As soon as the door opens, the baby jumps out of her arms and into the arms of his father. She hasn't seen the two of them together in years. Tsukimaru greedily grabs at his father's face, pinching his nose, laughing and tugging on his hair. She smiles happily. "I didn't realize you two were such good friends." Tsukimaru finds strips of Sesshomaru's hair and puts them in his mouth.
"What are you doing here?" He lifts his son to his lips, kissing his crescent moon and bouncing him on his hip.
"I…my father…." She stops herself, "I'm trapped. Whatever I say, I betray someone close to me."
"You would term our relationship close?" He laughs devilishly, making her heart drop. It's not easy being bound to someone who wants nothing to do with you, or finding out he took his current lover to his family's Villa but not her. They never had the time to cement their relationship. She can feel it though as she takes in the harshness of his, the cool amber colored rocks staring back at her, his yoki rises and it takes all her strength to stop herself from entangling herself in it.
"I helped your human. I fought for you," she says firmly. She helped slay the ogre king, she depleted her own yoki to save Rin, I deserve more than this. "I'm trying to make up for what I did."
"And now you intend to betray your father," he motions her to come inside. He shuts the door and sits down by the window tickling his son's sides. The baby giggles hysterically and the snuggles onto his father's shoulder.
"I'm trying, Sesshomaru, does that mean nothing? I've kept my distance. I keep my feelings inside so you don't feel them. We agreed," she sits in front of him, smiling again. "I like seeing you with him."
"He's my son." He says it so incredulously she almost regrets the smile that is stretching her cheeks. It feels good to know that he loves this child as much as the others.
"I thought you would love the other three more," she can't look at him when she says that. "He wasn't made in love as they were."
"Tsukimaru is the same as my other three children. Thank you for sending him to me daily." He nuzzles the inside of the child's neck making him laugh again. "Why did you come? I know you can feel it between us."
"It's like a vortex," she rubs her heart, it takes all her effort to remain so far away from him. Their bonds are resonating off each other, sucking them in. "I know why my father is doing this. I had nothing to do with it, Sesshomaru. I was fine waiting until Rin dies…but…it's my father. He's scared. The monks are attacking. They can't detect your home because the reiki cancels out the yoki and he wants me to live with you so I can find out how you made the barrier."
Sesshomaru scoffs lowering his head. "You choose to be loyal to this Sesshomaru?"
She nods her head. "I…"
"Love me?" He starts laughing genuinely at her absurdity and she feels ridiculous for the warmth in her heart she feels for him.
"No," she whispers, obviously hurt by his indifference. "I want to make the right choice this time. I acted for myself last time and you are the father of my son. If my father hurts you, he'll hurt me. And Tsukimaru could lose both of us. He deserves better than that."
"Thank you," he says scooting forward. He cups her chin and nuzzles her nose, their lips brush against each other for the briefest moment. He rests their crescent moons together. "I will end this."
"Why can't you just tell him?"
"There are too many that depend on the barrier for safety. My children included," he passes Tsukimaru back to Natsuki. "Your father hasn't made the right allies."
"He hates humans," she gazes at him longingly. Their lips meet again. He cups her face, dipping his tongue into her mouth. Her breath quickens, until she pushes him back. She made a promise.
"You need to leave now," he tells her panting. She can see it, he's about to lose control.
She can feel his yoki rising, wanting to wrap around her, tugging at her senses. "You need to learn to control that."
She rises to leave but he catches her wrist, pulling her back into his lap. She feels his nose and mouth against her neck. "Are you happy here, Natsuki?"
"It's lonely sometimes. Your mother isn't always the best company. My friends are in the West but with the way things are…" she trails off. "I heard about your daughter. Is she okay?"
"She is well." His nose rubs against her skin making her bite her lip.
"I'm sorry," he says quietly, and kisses the joint of her neck, his lips burning a scar into her neck. "This is not how it was meant to be."
"I don't understand." She tries to get up again, only for his hold to tighten. "Sesshomaru, you're going to do something you regret." Tsukimaru squirms in her arms, trying to twist out of her grasp back to his.
"If we were human, would I be asked to make such sacrifices?"
His words are distant but his lips are so close to her skin.
"To give more to the three children in my home and leave the one here behind. What will he think of this Sesshomaru when he is grown? That I loved them more than him?" He reaches over her shoulder and caresses his son's cheek with his crooked finger. "How can I trade his happiness for theirs?"
"I tell him you love him."
"I barely see him," she hears a pain in his voice, unspoken words. "When this is over, I will come more frequently."
She's left stunned by his words. "When he's weaned, I'll send him to you. Only fifteen more years." Teeth scrape against her shoulder and she leans forward, trying to get away from his mouth. "Why are you doing this?" she pants out. "We can't…"
"I'm exhausted, Natsuki…my daughter is attacked for what she is. My son is in the sky…my lover," he closes his eyes resting them against the window. "She…if Tsukimaru ran away and nearly caused one of our deaths, what would you do?"
"Beat him, we would teach him better than that."
"And if he didn't listen."
"He will."
"You know nothing of children, sweet one. If he didn't listen?"
"I suppose if it was that bad…we would beat him and hope he learns. What's wrong?" She finally does what she had been avoiding and she opens her bond, feeling an ache in his heart, a sadness, tenseness, stress and exhaustion. "You need to sleep."
"There is no time for sleep. Your father complicates matters. You are happy here?"
"You care?"
"I care," he rests his face in her hair, breathing deeply. "If we were human, you would be my second wife. I would still be obligated to care for you, to ensure your happiness. Are you happy here?"
"I miss home," she admits sourly. "My brother, he just turned a hundred and seventy. We used to play together in the fields around our home."
"Do you wish to return?"
"When it's safe. I hear the rumors, the fear," she holds her son close. "I can't lose him. I can't lose our son, Sesshomaru."
"We won't lose him. You are safe here, in the skies. I'm sorry that this is our fate." He finally releases her but holds her hand as she glides to the door. "Natsuki?"
She can feel it, the need within him. He's boiling, but not with lust, with an ache, that she reaches out to comfort with her own yoki. "Why aren't you going to her?"
He shakes his head and doesn't answer.
She forces more of her yoki inside of him, like a tense breath. "You can really end it?"
"Easily, leave," he waves her away. "I'll send Tsukimaru back with a servant," he removes the baby from her hands again.
She holds her chest to steady her heart as she leaves. She smiles, I did the right thing. But he was pushing it. She rubs her neck where his mouth was just moments before. He was pushing it.
Time for you guys to make a vote. The Interludes are done. But...do we want more Nina and Taka POV while they are in the clinic? I haven't written them yet, but if you want it let me know in the reviews.
Please review! Oh his senses were slipping...and I think he felt a bit bitter about what happened with Rin and conflicted about the time he is sacrificing with one son over the others.
Coming on Tuesday February 18th Sesshomaru-Past...man we're just drawing out that cliffhanger from the future timeline.
Story Plug: I have been working with Nightbird755 on Sesshomaru and Avalon. It's Sess/OC, I write Sesshomaru for her most of the time, I would definitely encourage reading it. It involves a graphic rape in the first chapter so please be aware of that. This is her very first fanfic so please review review review...
Kimmigirl9: Oh I know..the next few Kagome POV's are going to be very difficult to read. I'm debating writing some more TAKA and NINA to break it up with humor/fluff.
Harukasempai14: Lied? Maybe never answered her an used subterfuge...possibly lied. Sesshomaru's blood is not the cure. It's Tsukimaru and Taiyomaru which Kagome doesn't remember. So the whole explanation of why he never changed it will be explained in the end of the story...when the well reopens. You'll have to hold on until then.
Itzatakahashi: Thank you soo much! I'm glad you like it. Yeah she suspects. The problem is Sesshomaru never told her when or what the symptoms were so she is literally flying blind and she can't even go through the well to ask.
Mechine: I know...we finally see the dreaded disease rearing its ugly head. Yes Kagome forgot. She was only 15 and still recovering from her battle with Naraku and Sesshomaru gave her that whopper of a fever afterwards, her mind is fuzzy...Natsuki's inability to go into heat will be answered near the end of the story.
smahammazing: Thank you for your review on KOF too it made Kimmigirl and my day! I was crying too...and I already wrote that chapter where he passes and it's sooo..we gonna need us some tissues for that one.
Reaper 007: I love your passion. All your questions are like, what can we do to stop this horror from happening. So about her forgetting, remember he gave her a whopper of a fever after, dumped a ton of information on her lap and then he never talked about it again...so yes she forgot and he also never told her when or what it looked like. We can't assume that changing their fates for the better wouldn't come without consequences. Again she didn't have enough information to act and by the time it came she couldn't go to Sesshomaru in the future for help. I think the rest of what you said is again, how can we stop it? Is this really going to happen?
Gina: Yay thank you :)
