Chapter Twenty-One: Awkward Reunion

The young commander sat in a desk within one of Trabia Garden's many classrooms, with his elbows resting on his knees and his face buried in his hands. Around him, concerned faces watched him, occasionally exchanging worried glances with each other.

"Dude, it's not as bad as you think it is," Zell said softly, trying to be as comforting as he could. "I mean, Sal Gal's already told you it's cool."

"I know," Squall muffled into his hands. "I guess…it just surprised me." He raised his head to meet Sally's compassionate gaze. "I still don't think I should have let it affect me the way it did, though."

"Oh, for goodness' sake," Quistis sighed as Zone looked on. "You've always been like this; you think that negative reactions are all you are."

"Hey!" Selphie protested, hopping up from her spot at Squall's side to stand between him and Quistis. "Don't say things like that! The last thing a hurting person needs is to be scolded!"

"But Squall's the only one hurting Squall right now," Quistis pointed out.

Selphie opened her mouth to speak again, only to be stopped by Squall's touch to her arm. "It's fine, Selphie; she's right," he told her. "I do set the bar pretty high for myself."

"But-"

"What bothered me most about it is that it affected Miss Regal's promotion ceremony," he continued, interrupting her follow-up protest.

"But it didn't, dude," Zell insisted. "Look, I get that seeing him all-of-a-sudden like that was a downer for you, but you were so high from seeing Ellone that it actually brought you down to something more like normal."

Squall managed to snort a chuckle. "Yeah, I think I see what you mean. Thanks, Z."

"No prob!" the martial artist replied with his typical confident grin.

"Squall?"

Squall looked up to Selphie, who had turned to face him with a worried expression. "It's like he said; I'd gotten worked up and suddenly crashed."

"F-For what it's worth, I agree," Sally added timidly as she twirled her pigtail over her shoulder. "You looked really c-cool when you were announcing my promotion."

The classroom door quietly slid open, and everyone looked over to see Ellone standing in the open doorway. "Am…Am I interrupting?"

"No way!" Zell exclaimed as he and Squall quickly rose to his feet. "C'mon in!"

She accepted hugs from all her orphanage siblings before finally turning concerned eyes on her favorite. "Squall, are you okay?"

"I'm…kinda embarrassed," he scoffed awkwardly as he ran his fingers through his hair, "but I think I'm all right."

She smiled fondly at him, the way an older sister should. "He wants to talk to you, you know."

Squall snapped his intense gaze to her serene one. "He does? Why?"

"He knows that you have questions, and…" She ducked her head shyly. "…he does, too."

Squall sighed, feeling the anger finally starting to drain from his being. "Where is he?"

"He's back in the Quad, talking with Cid and the other headmaster," she said, gestured back to the classroom door. "But since he could see that you…" She paused to choose her next words carefully. "…weren't exactly pleased to see him, he asked me to come to you on his behalf."

Squall reflexively bristled at the man's cowardice before reason kicked in; of course Laguna wouldn't want to potentially needlessly provoke him, so it made sense to send someone they both trusted. "All right, fair enough. Sorry."

"It's quite all right," she said with a delicate giggle.

"Where does he want to meet?"

Ellone gestured to the door again. "There's an exterior balcony on the second floor; he would like to meet with you there if that's acceptable."

Squall internally cringed; if she was referring to the spot he thought she was, it would be where Selphie had effectively confessed to him earlier in the evening. "Could we…? No, that's fine," he said; he'd thought of asking about changing the venue, but he realized that it was his discomfort trying to take over. "What time?"

"He was hoping for nine-o-clock," she replied, then giggled. "That'd be twenty-one-hundred hours, right?"

"Yeah, that's right," he replied, chuckling along with her. "Fine; twenty-one-hundred hours on the second-floor exterior balcony."

"Thank you, Squall," she said, her trademark gentle smile returning. "If it's any consolation, he's anxious about it as well."

Squall suddenly remembered that the two of them were not alone, and cleared his throat as he cast his gaze elsewhere. "Th-Thanks for letting me know."

"You're welcome." She stepped up to him and hopped on her tiptoes to give him a kiss on the cheek. "I'm so happy to see you again." With that, she waved as she left the room, the door sliding shut behind her.

Zell, as usual, was the first to break the silence. "Well that was pretty cool; wish she'd hung out with us, though."

"I imagine she feels like a bit of an outsider," Quistis noted. "After all, we've worked together this whole time, while she's worked alone. She's supported us, sure, but from a distance."

"And it's not the same as having her right here with us," Zell grunted. "Man, that sucks; we need to get her on the team."

"I can't imagine her fighting, though," Selphie giggled in spite of a nagging jealousy due to the kiss. "I mean, could you see her laying into a Grat?"

"Maybe with a good tongue-lashing!" Zell quipped, drawing laughter from the others.

Squall chuckled along with them before his expression grew serious at the thought of his upcoming conversation with the president of Esthar… His father.


Selphie accompanied Squall as he traveled to the second floor and his meeting with Laguna. "Are you okay, Squall?"

He glanced over at her with a smile tinged with anxiety. "You know, it was easier when he was giving us instructions on how to kill Ultimecia."

"You're nervous, then?" It was more of a statement than a question.

He glanced over at her open and honest expression and allowed his guard to drop more than usual. "I don't know how to explain it; for some reason, I'm kinda worried that he'll be disappointed with me, with the way I've turned out."

"He could've stuck around instead of running off the way he did," she pointed out as they ascended the stairs. "He could have been a positive influence in your life."

"He was looking for Ellone," Squall protested with the wave of an arm. "I can't fault him for that. Shoot, I'm the one who thought that I had to beat Seifer or I'd never get to see her again."

Selphie licked her lips. "Squall, may I make a suggestion?"

Squall blinked in surprise before glancing her way yet again. "Um, sure."

She took a deep breath. "I think you're overthinking your situation with him. As far as the rest of us are concerned, you've done really well and have grown a lot since becoming a SeeD, both professionally and personally. As hard as it is for me to say…" She winced in anticipation of his reaction. "…if it turns out that he's disappointed in you, it seems to me that it would say more about him than it would about you."

Squall's eyes lost focus as they finished climbing the stairs and started toward the narrow hallway that led to the balcony. "I think you're right, but…it's still going to bother me."

"That's okay," she giggled as she gave his arm a brief squeeze. "You're basically meeting your father for the first time, right? I think anyone'd be nervous about that."

He allowed a chuckle as they reached the entrance to the side hallway. "Thanks." He didn't move from there, though, but stood with his unfocused gaze on the floor.

She smiled lovingly at his expression before risking a step forward to wrap her arms around him. "Everything'll be okay, Squall; no matter what happens, I'm here for you."

She felt him shudder before he slowly wrapped his arm around her as well. "Thank you."

They held each other for a couple of minutes before Squall reluctantly pulled away, his hands coming to rest on her shoulders. "It's about time," he told her.

"Y-Yeah…" she agreed, unsure how else to respond as she looked up into his face.

His gaze was drawn to her innocent and beautiful green eyes, and he noticed the slight unevenness of the waves at the ends of her hair, and the way her lower lip slightly protruded in a charming pout. "I…I'd better go," he concluded, and quickly turned to head down the narrow side hall, feeling a slight twinge in his right leg as he moved. "See you later."

"Y-Yeah…see you," she breathed, her chest feeling tighter than it ever had.


"Commander Leonhart!" the president of Esthar greeted as Squall emerged from the hallway and onto the balcony. "It's been a long time!"

"It has, sir," Squall replied somewhat stiffly as he joined the older man at the rail and shook hands. "What did you wish to discuss with me?"

Laguna chuckled awkwardly as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Right to the point, eh? Fair enough; I remember saying that we'd have a lot to talk about." He looked out upon Trabia's glittering whiteness. "Please don't blame Miss Tilmitt, but she's the one who asked us to come; she wanted Ellone to come so you could see her, and me so…" The corner of his mouth twitched. "…so I could tell you about your parents."

"I already know," Squall informed him matter-of-factly. "You're my father and Raine's my mother. After escaping the Lunatic Pandora you ended up in Winhill, where she nursed you back to health. You two fell in love and got married. I'm assuming that you didn't know that she was pregnant when you left to find Ellone."

"Yeah…" Laguna murmured as he rubbed his hand across his jaw. "That's basically the story. You're probably pretty mad that I wasn't there for you, huh?"

Squall sighed as he shifted his gaze to the Trabian landscape glittering under the moonlight. "Yes and no; while part of me is furious, another part of me understands."

"Yeah…" Laguna repeated, turning to study his son. His son. "Squall, even though I didn't know about you, I'm really sorry that I wasn't there for you…or for Rai-er, for your mother."

Squall worked his jaw, trying to keep the tears from escaping; he'd been hoping for some expression of regret, but to actually hear it… "I forgive you. It'll just take some time to deal with the feelings." He drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. "But, I managed to recover from losing Ellone; I'm sure I'll get over this."

"Hey." Squall looked over at Laguna's prompt to find him with an uncharacteristically serious expression. "If… If there's anything I can do to help, let me know, okay? I know I can't make up for not being your…your…"

"My father…?" Squall prompted.

"…your dad for all those years, but I'd like a chance to be one now." He chuckled awkwardly. "Though I get that you're probably not interested in tossing the ball or anything like that, and with all you've done you sure don't need me trying to teach you about life."

Squall couldn't help but chuckle at the older ma-no, his father's words, though he had to swallow a lump of emotion before he could speak again. "I'm… I'm sure we could find…something…to do or talk about."

Laguna smiled over at his son before turning and reaching out to grip him by the shoulders. "Squall, look at me, would you?"

Even though he didn't know how he'd react internally, Squall still forced his gaze to his father's eyes. "Yeah?"

Laguna squeezed his son's shoulders several times before he spoke. "Squall… I've missed out on so much, and…" He averted his glance briefly before forcing it back to his son's face in spite of his tears. "…it hurts like hell, man."

"Thanks," Squall replied, starting to feel the familiar pressure behind his eyes.

Laguna's jaw worked vigorously as he tried to get the words out. "I would trade every minute of my time as president just so I could have been there for you…son." He started to pull Squall towards himself, then quickly pulled away while clearing his throat. "You're…probably not interested in that right now. Sorry."

Squall stared at the man who had been half-responsible for giving him life, and without a word he pulled his father to himself as he allowed the tears to flow.


"I haven't been to the Trabian continent in a long time," Laguna remarked as he stood shoulder-to-shoulder with his son as they looked up at the stars. "The sky always seems so much clearer here than over Esthar."

"It is pretty," Squall agreed as he tried to pick out constellations.

"How are you and Sorceress Rinoa doing?"

The question caught Squall of guard. "R-Rinoa?"

"Sure!" Laguna laughed. "I haven't forgotten how focused you were when you came to the space station; you were all 'Rinoa, Rinoa, Rinoa' back then."

"Oh." Squall's mood darkened as he thought back to his conversation with her, the one that ended with their breakup. "We're…not together anymore."

"Seriously?" Laguna exclaimed, the surprise evident in his tone. "But you…and she…"

"We…don't see things the same way," Squall explained. "And I'm not talking about things like colors or home decorations or stuff like that; we just see relationships differently," he finished, opting to exclude his observations regarding Rinoa's behavior.

Laguna sighed heavily. "Damn, I'm really sorry to hear that. You okay?"

"I'm fine," Squall chuckled. "I'm still her Knight and we're still friends."

"It'll probably be a while before you can hang out together again," Laguna noted in a somber tone.

"I figured."

The older man sighed heavily before clapping his son on the shoulder. "Well, at least you two learned about this before getting married; it can get pretty messy afterward."

Squall chuckled lightly. "That's oddly comforting." Then, curiosity had him sighing. "Hey, um…Dad?"

Laguna blinked in surprise at Squall's use of his title. "Y-Yeah?"

Squall turned to face him, leaning on the wall. "Do you…? Do you miss Mom?"

Laguna blinked again at Squall's use of Raine's title. "Yeah, I do. Not as much as I used to, of course," he replied with a sigh. Then he glanced over at Squall. "A decade-and-a-half tends to take the edge off of emotions, I've noticed."

Squall nodded thoughtfully. "I think I understand."

Laguna straightened to lightly bop his fist against the balcony's retaining wall. "But some regrets…? They tend to stay with you until they're resolved." He looked over at his son again, this time with a warm smile. "Thanks, Squall."

Squall returned his dad's smile before the two men resumed their stargazing.

After several minutes of silence, Laguna spoke again. "Um…Ellone and I have a 'gift' for you."

"A gift?" Squall echoed. "For me?"

Laguna looked over at him with a conspiratorial grin. "You want it now?"

Squall wasn't sure how to respond to his dad's facial expression. "Um, sure, if it's okay…"

"Then let's go!" Laguna exclaimed, pushing off the wall to head toward the hallway back into Trabia Garden proper. "This is gonna be awesome!"

Squall chuckled at his father's antics as he wondered what the gift could be.