Chapter 13

"Taiga, Tatsuya!" Reo calls as soon as he lays eyes on them, raising a hand that's still clutching a blue microfiber cloth between its polished fingers in a wave. "A pleazure to see you, as always. 'Ow was the game?"

"Total domination," Tatsuya says dramatically, spreading his arms in a wide arc, before nudging Taiga in the ribs with one elbow. "We're unstoppable when we really work together, little bro."

"Yeah, we took all three rounds," Taiga says, a little more subdued as he takes his place at the bar. "Two weeks in a row."

"Bon travail! I'll get the libations to celebrate!"

"Don't forget my employee discount," Tatsuya says jokingly, plunking down on a stool next to Taiga and throwing him a victorious grin. For some reason, though he's still coming down off the high of the game,Taiga is somewhat reluctant to join in his lofty spirits, and the smile he gives back feels a little strained.

He knows he should be celebrating. Knows that tonight, he really has every right to. From the first time he'd met Aomine - the first time he'd even heard about him, and his supposedly endless winning streak - he'd wanted more than anything to go up against him and give him a taste of defeat. Rise to the challenge and beat it just to prove to himself that he could.

And after weeks of trailing in second place, he finally pulled off the hat trick. He won, fair and square, not just by default this time. He took down the reigning champ and almost single-handedly tipped the scales, making some people suddenly much richer, and others suddenly very pissed. He earned his moment in the spotlight, earned all the congratulatory back slaps and high fives from the spectators who had rooted for him. Earned a commemorative drink with his brother above all, but right now, he doesn't think he could want it any less.

The victory itself rings pretty hollow when he can't shake the feeling that he's gone and ruined someone's night with it, someone he's really come to care about... and he doesn't think he can very well party in good conscience with that thought in the back of his head.

"I see your lovely companion is abzent again zis evening," Reo observes, as if he'd read his damn mind, setting down his cloth to approach the counter. "Are you 'iding 'im from me? Keeping your pretty things all to yourself?"

"Who, Aomine? No, he uh… didn't seem interested in coming tonight."

"Buzzkill!" Tatsuya interjects loudly, drawing Reo's gaze. "You should've seen his face when the game was over, it was like… shell-shocked, like he couldn't believe we ordinary mortals could've ever beaten him. Probably why he lost in the first place."

Taiga doesn't say anything to refute this, because he knows Tatsuya's brand of teasing well enough to tell when he's really being malicious, and he supposes he's been thrashed by Aomine enough times to warrant some gloating when the tables turn. ...Besides, a little insensitivity between brothers is in the fine print.

He'd been considerably more willing to soak up the praise after the game, beaming and chatting eagerly with fans either in spite of or without noticing Taiga's reluctance, and Taiga had been glad at the time to divert the attention over to him. He gave the obligatory smile or fist bump whenever he was approached, but as much as possible, he'd tried to melt into the background. Easier said than done when he might as well have had "I Beat The Unbeatable Aomine Daiki: Ask Me How" in block letters on his shirt. He's always been too tall for crowds, anyway.

"Ah, a poor loser, is 'e?" Reo asks, wrenching the cork from a bottle of prosecco with a resounding pop.

"I don't know," Taiga admits, watching him fill two highball glasses with light, sparkling liquid. "He seemed kind of… off even before the game started."

"If you say so," Tatsuya shrugs, snatching up his glass and taking a sip. Taiga accepts his own with a bit more hesitation, watching the bubbles prickle the glass as they rise to the surface.

Yeah, Aomine had definitely been weird; had said very little and played like a total stranger, and he kept brushing Taiga off repeatedly over the course of the night, insisting things were fine… Some part of Taiga desperately wants to believe him. Wants to believe there's nothing going on and if there were, Aomine would tell him straight up. They've come to a place now where they can be honest with each other, haven't they?

Then again, maybe not…

"Could 'e 'ave been feeling under ze weather?" Reo suggests.

"I guess?" Taiga says, still staring down into his champagne. "His daughter did come down with something pretty recently, but… I dunno, he was like… all quiet and testy, like there was something really bugging him. And when he lost, he looked at me like... like I'd taken something away from him."

Reo hums a sympathetic sound and leans his elbow against the counter, resting his chin in his hand, but Tatsuya doesn't seem nearly so moved.

"Taiga, seriously," he snorts, "I know you've got the moral compass of a shounen protagonist, but you don't need to feel guilty for beating a guy just 'cause you're also fenorking him."

Taiga chokes on the sip he dared to take a second ago, the bubbles shooting straight up into his nose, and as he coughs into his sleeve he regrets all of the unfortunate life choices that led him to this moment; his choice of a brother most of all.

"Please never say 'fenorking' in regards to Aomine again," he groans once he recovers, covering his face with his hands before it can really start burning.

"How 'bout plugging the dam?" Tatsuya grins, undeterred. "Knocking boots? Spelunking? Aggressive cuddling?"

"Tremper le biscuit, l'amour en levrette, a bit of ' 'ow's your father -?'"

Taiga does his best to glare at them both between his fingers, "Actually, no commentary about my love life at all. From either of you. I'm cutting you off."

"Fine," Tatsuya says breezily. "But I'm just saying... from what I've seen of the guy, he's not that fragile. I'll bet he comes back swinging, whatever's going on with him."

"I wish I knew what was going on with him, though..." Taiga says, perhaps a little more candidly than he would with anyone else. He trails off and looks away, one hand cradled around his glass on the bartop without picking it up.

Reo looks at him with a tiny half-smile pursing his lips, and leans across the counter, a curtain of silky hair falling in front of his face, "It's alright, my little porcelet, tell your auntie Reo all about it."

Taiga sighs, "It's just… I don't want to pry into his life if he doesn't want me there, or make it into a big thing, but like... what if there is something major he's not telling me? It wouldn't be the first time."

"Like about his daughter, you mean?" Tatsuya cuts in shrewdly, tossing back another swallow of champagne.

"Yeah," Taiga says. "Exactly."

It's not that Taiga's particularly bothered that Aomine didn't tell him about Yui until the night he met her in person, until he practically had her thrust into his arms. He doesn't get the impression that he'd meant to keep her a secret indefinitely, and it must have been difficult to bring the subject up, in his position… but he doesn't think a little transparency is too much to ask for, after the fact. Now that that's all out in the open. Now that Taiga's involved - has let himself become involved - with Aomine and his family life; tried his damnedest to be as flexible and understanding as possible, and make things easy for him… shouldn't he at least get to know what's going on?

"If you ask me," Reo prompts gently, "Ze two of you need to 'ave a nice long 'eart to 'eart. You need to tell 'im 'ow zat makes you feel."

"Hear hear," Tatsuya says, lifting his glass in a probably sarcastic toast, "Aren't you the one who's always harping on about communication and shit? Take your own advice and just talk to him. In person, if you can, so there's no dodging the question."

"I know," Taiga says, raking a hand through his hair. "I just... don't know if he's open to it, you know?"

Reo stops scowling at Tatsuya long enough to smile across the bar at him in that way that he has, with the simple, genuine assurance that things will turn out alright.

"Don't worry so much. If 'e values your relationship, 'e will be."

.

.

There were only a handful of situations Daiki knew of where Satsuki could be completely, remorselessly cruel. If she had reason to suspect, for instance, that some dickhead was underestimating her abilities or her intelligence because of her gender, she'd tear the unfortunate fucker apart before he even knew what hit him. And when she knew she was right in an argument and had the evidence to back it up, which she usually did, heaven help the person who tried to tell her she was wrong. It was why Daiki tended to pick his own fights with her from the angle of expecting to retreat before he lost, and had a good deal more stalemates against her than actual points proven.

The situation he was faced with here, however, he couldn't so easily escape, because it turned out Satsuki was a whole other, unprecedented level of vicious while she was giving birth.

"Of course you did this to me," she was panting, in between strangled groans and shouts. Her gaze was nowhere near Daiki's face, her wrathful eyes trailing from the ceiling to some point out in space, but there was no question who she was talking to. A shudder ran through her body as another contraction seized her, and through gritted teeth she continued her assault. "You - FUCK - you always make things - so difficult, and I - AHH - I'm the one who's worse off -"

Daiki winced as her voice broke off around a gasp, and didn't say anything in his own defense. He had no argument. In fact he felt like, in this situation, he probably ought to try and comfort her, but he got the feeling if he got any closer to her right now she might just slap him across the face. She'd already ripped the back of his hand with her nails when he tried offering that.

Even in her worst temper, it was very rare to hear her let slip any sort of profanity, so the fact that she was dropping f-bombs even as a response to pain was reason enough to give her space. He didn't dare leave her side, though, because of something else she'd said in the throes of her agony.

"You asked for this."

He had, hadn't he? He'd made his mind up, and refused to hear a word of argument, from his parents, from Satsuki, from Satsuki's parents; he'd planted both feet on this hill and refused to budge. But now, watching Satsuki furiously struggle to push out his goddamn baby, now that they were here at last and there was no turning back, he had to think… had he even known what he'd been asking for? He'd been waiting and waiting to get to this point, the point where he would no longer be watching and promising and could finally act, and now that it was upon him, he didn't have a clue what he was supposed to do.

And Satsuki was far from giving him any sort of reassurance.

"If you fuck this up," she was hissing now, breathing in quick gulps, "I swear to God - if you back out and make me come rescue you - we're done. You'll wish you'd - AHH - just taken the out when you had the chance -"

Daiki looked away from her face, his hands shoved deep in his pockets, but though his gaze traveled from the featureless wall to the floor to the fluorescent ceiling lights overhead, he still felt like he couldn't escape her accusing glare, piercing like needles into his back.

"I should never have listened to you."

Daiki didn't know if she'd actually intended for him to hear that; it was much quieter than her other criticisms, like she was talking to herself, but at the moment, it was enough of a breaking point for him. The air in the tiny hospital room was starting to feel stifling, the lights overhead cold and shocking; he was sweating, breathing shallow in the enclosed space, and he could no longer stay standing there. He didn't know where he was going or how he had summoned the willpower to move, but all of a sudden he was walking, operating under the primal animal instinct that simply said he had to get away.

"Don't you fucking leave me with this, Dai-chan!" Satsuki shouted after him, as he made for the door, "You coward -!"

Even after it shut behind him, cutting him off from the room and what was happening inside it, he could still hear her in his head as clear as day, while he stood in the hallway, panting as if he'd sprinted on the way out.

He looked up at the sound of the door opening behind him, to find that Satsuki's dad had followed him out into the hall. His face was calm, given the circumstances, and he acknowledged Daiki with a brief nod, before settling beside him without asking if he could.

"Just... getting some air," Daiki said stiffly, hunching his shoulders and averting his gaze.

He thought it was a pretty safe bet that Satsuki's dad wouldn't buy the excuse, but he didn't say anything to that effect. In fact for a few moments he didn't say anything at all. He just stood there in the hospital aisle, crossing his ankles and leaning against the wall as if he had all the time in the world. As if his daughter wasn't in labor right on the other side of the door.

Sweating, anxious to break the tense silence, Daiki cast about for something to say.

"It's gotta be weird for you, huh?" was what he finally settled on, shoving his hands in his pockets and trying to fight off the awkwardness.

"Hmm?" Satsuki's dad asked, as if he'd only just noticed Daiki was there. And it occurred to Daiki that he might not have actually followed him out to like, counsel him or whatever the fuck. He couldn't decide if that notion was a relief or a disappointment.

"It's just… I mean… all this," he stammered, unsure if he should even be talking at all. Maybe they both should have just stood there in silence, waiting and useless.

Satsuki's dad sighed, with the kind of wry, defeated resignation Daiki figured this whole situation had probably brought, "Well, I admit I might've pictured this moment a little differently when she was a little girl."

Daiki blinked, "You thought about her having kids when she was still a kid herself?"'

"Sure, I imagine all parents think about those things for their child, at some point. Dating, marriage, starting a family…"

Daiki lowered his gaze, struck by a flash of some uncomfortable emotion he didn't recognize. Something similar to the powerful urge that had driven him out of the room in the first place.

"I thought about it," he said, without looking up from the tiled linoleum floor, that twisting, nameless feeling pulling the admission out of him like he didn't have a choice in the matter. Like it was going to fix something.

"Pardon?" Satsuki's dad asked, leaning forward slightly.

"Um…" Scrubbing a hand through his hair, he kept the other firmly in his pocket, and his eyes on the other side of the hall, "I thought maybe I should… if… but she doesn't want that right now, she's… she needs to go to school. And anyway, we're too young, and we're not… it just wouldn't work."

He shuffled his feet as he finished that lame confession, having said too much and nothing whatsoever at the same time. He didn't know this guy well enough to say what his reaction would be; if he'd scoff or laugh or get angry, and he didn't dare meet his gaze to try and find out.

"Dai-kun," Satsuki's dad said, pushing off the wall to advance a step toward him, "You know her mother and I don't have any expectations for you, right? You haven't disappointed us, and we're not angry with you."

Daiki looked at him, really looked, for maybe the first time since he'd come out here after him, taken aback by the sincerity of his voice, and the expression on his lightly lined face. He didn't know why, but hearing that seemed to soothe some of the gnawing inside him, and he let out his breath slowly.

"...It's okay. Life happens," Satsuki's dad went on, his voice soft but still seeming to fill up the empty hallway, and the yawning pit in Daiki's stomach, as he spoke, "And maybe it doesn't always happen the way you want it to, but I think you're making the best of this situation, even if other people might not see it that way."

"You don't… think it's a mistake?" He didn't know where the question came from or why it suddenly mattered so much, but it was out before he could try to take it back.

"No," Satsuki's dad said, and cracked a small smile, "Don't forget, I've watched you grow up with Satsuki since you were practically babies yourselves; I've seen how readily you defend her, and look out for her in ways she probably doesn't even realize. I think that instinct to protect is really all you need. The rest you can learn as you go."

Daiki didn't say anything at first, afraid if he looked at the unexpected affirmation too closely, it would shatter and become untrue. But he couldn't ignore the little voice in the back of his mind that doubted the words of encouragement forever.

"What if… I mean..." he began, lowering his head as he suddenly became keenly aware of the gap of age and experience between them. He didn't know why it had taken this long. "There's no way I'm not gonna screw up, I just -"

"Oh sure, you'll make mistakes, and plenty of them," Satsuki's dad said, but there was still a smile in his voice, "Goodness knows I made my fair share; all you can do is take them in stride, and try to learn from them. Unfortunately, there's no such thing as a perfect parent… we're all just doing the best we can."

Daiki nodded at the floor as he took that in, feeling much less resistant to the things he was hearing now that they didn't sound so much like empty promises. Besides, the guy had to know what he was talking about, didn't he? After all, he raised one of the smartest people Daiki had ever met.

"...I think I'm ready to go back now," he said after a long lapse of silence, and was surprised to find that actually, he did feel ready. More so now than he had the entire time they'd been here.

"Yeah," Satsuki's dad sighed, rolling his shoulders back. "Me too."

.

.

Yui hadn't enjoyed the ambulance ride one bit. She hadn't been thrilled to be removed from her car seat to begin with, squirming fussily in Daiki's arms and grumbling a sleepy protest, but the moment she was bombarded with the blinding colored lights and screeching sirens, in addition to people she didn't recognize all talking at once, she'd started all-out wailing at the top of her lungs, strangled and congested as they were. And she'd clung to Daiki's shirt so tightly he'd found himself thinking that the paramedics were going to have to use extreme force if they wanted to take her from him. As it happened, they hadn't, and had allowed Daiki to hold her in his lap on the ride to the hospital, provided he let them attach a heartbeat monitor to her finger. He'd had a hard time discerning if the siren was any louder than her screams.

At the hospital, she'd seemed a little calmer - or maybe the ordeal of the trip had simply tired her out - though she clearly was still not on board with any of what was happening. It was all Daiki could do to stay with her and keep talking as soothingly as he could manage, while her chest was X-rayed and her blood was drawn and her ears, nose and throat were examined. And then, finally, that was all over and he was left to wait, kissing her band-aids, murmuring words of praise and comfort, sheltering her against his chest as if he could shield off the surrounding chaos with his own body.

By the time the results came back, he'd almost managed to lull her to sleep, in spite of all the beeping and talking and squeaking wheels and clacking shoes that floated in around them. It wasn't altogether a long wait.

'Bacterial pneumonia,' the doctor had said, and prescribed an antibiotic. And that was that.

The brevity of the whole thing had made Daiki wonder at first if maybe he'd overreacted to Tetsu's cutting words and the sight of blood, and wound up calling the world's most expensive noisy Uber for no reason. But on the other hand, as he left the emergency ward, he couldn't help thinking that he'd take 'why did you bring her here?' over 'why didn't you bring her sooner?' any day.

Now that he's had her back at home for a day or so, and put her on the antibiotics the doctor ordered, he thinks he can finally breathe a little bit. Not quite relax, because the cost of the ambulance and the hospital and the medicine itself are a massive blow he doesn't know how he's going to recover from, and Yui is still coughing frequently and not acting like herself, but at least he knows she's not in any life-threatening danger now. The knowledge hasn't done him any favors as far as getting a wink of sleep, but it's still worth knowing.

It's also a relief to have a little time off this weekend to stay with her while she recovers. She's still restless, and fighting him on having to lay down and nap, so he brings her into the living room, sits with her on the couch and puts something happy and colorful on the TV, or keeps her busy with toys and games that don't require much physical activity. Right now it's a puzzle, made of large wooden pieces that each feature a different farm animal in bright, primary colors, which she's spread out all over the floor. He's joined her on the tatami, laying on his stomach in a space he's cleared across from her to help her decide where the sheep lives, and what kind of animal is on the blue square.

"It's a rooster," he says, handing the piece back to her, "That means a daddy chicken."

"Chinkens can't be daddies," she says, squinting at the friendly rooster drawing suspiciously.

"Sure they can," Daiki laughs, pointing to another piece on the floor in front of her, "See, that one's the mommy chicken, sitting on her nest. They probably want to go together."

He indicates the empty space beside the hen where the rooster seems like it would fit, and Yui looks at the piece in her hand again.

"Does the daddy get a nest?"

"No, but he helps take care of the babies."

"Babies?"

"Yeah," Daiki says. "Look, the nest is full of eggs. And when they hatch, they'll be baby chickens."

"Babies're in eggs?" Yui asks, sitting up straight and looking at him with wide eyes.

"Well, not all eggs are -" Daiki starts to explain, but she breaks into a bout of coughing before he can finish, dropping the rooster piece on the floor.

It's not as violent and phlegmy as it was before, but he still straightens with alarm, and scoots in closer to gently rub her back until the fit subsides. She sniffs thickly, and rubs her nose on her arm.

"No, here," Daiki says, fishing a crumpled tissue out of his back pocket. It's been easier to just carry them with him than try to remember where he put them last.

Once she's blown her nose and wiped her face, she seems happier again, and settles back onto her stomach in front of the puzzle. After a moment of pause, Daiki joins her.

They've just come to an agreement about the placement of the yellow horse piece when his phone vibrates in his pocket, buzzing between his hip and the floor, and he hates the part of him that secretly hopes it's Tetsu, coming around with an apology after his standard forty-eight hours of silent brooding. He doesn't know if he's ready to accept one from him yet; he's definitely not ready to swallow his own injured pride and text him first, but it would at least be a comfort - however petty and vindictive - to know that he might feel a little bad about what he said. That he hasn't dismissed Daiki as completely as Daiki is trying to maintain that he's dismissed him.

It's probably the first time he's been disappointed to unlock his screen and see Kagami's name.

From Kagami

5:45 pm

Yo can we talk? Like face to face?

Something sinks in Daiki's stomach, and he lets out a deep sigh. Of course the bastard would pick the best possible time to vague-text him out of the blue, asking to talk. He has half a mind to just ignore the message, considering Tetsu's pointed accusation about getting distracted... but then again, at this point, why should he give a damn what Tetsu thinks? Besides, he can't shake an annoying feeling of guilt, probably rooted in the confusion that had twisted Kagami's face during the game on Friday, and an underlying dismay that he already knows what this is about.

Best to get it over with, then.

To Kagami

5:48 pm

Yeah

...Now?

From Kagami

5:51 pm

Sure, are u free?

He glances at Yui sprawled on the tatami beside him, shuffling the puzzle pieces around with her feet kicking in the air, and sighs again, softer this time.

To Kagami

5:52 pm

As I'll ever be

And that's how he winds up with Kagami on his doorstep, almost an hour later. Yui's face lights up as soon as she sees him, and he has to scoop her up quickly to prevent her from launching herself at him, mucous and all.

"Uncle Taiga!" she exclaims, her voice just a little raspy, but full of obvious joy.

Kagami indulges her with a wide smile first, and it shifts just a little by the time his eyes raise to meet Daiki's. Not necessarily apologetic, but hedged with some caution, at least.

"Hey," he says, scratching the back of his neck. "Sorry about the short notice; didn't know when I'd catch you again."

"Well, you caught me," Daiki says bluntly, and then flashes a grin to show that he's teasing. Kagami visibly relaxes.

"Still not feeling well, huh?" he asks Yui, as Daiki steps back to let him inside. He pulls off his shoes and sets them by the door, which Daiki figures is an indication of his intent to stay awhile.

"'M fine!" Yui says brightly, straining in Daiki's grasp until he sets her down in front of him. She immediately totters over to Kagami with both arms outstretched.

"She's not contagious," Daiki feels he should clarify, as she latches onto Kagami's leg. Anymore, he adds silently to himself. Provided the antibiotics are doing their job, which they seem to be, she should be in the clear now. As far as transmitting her sickness to someone else, at least.

"Wanna play cars, Uncle Taiga?" Yui asks, gesturing behind her at the mess of toys spread out across the floor. The puzzle had only proved entertaining for a short while, and the discarded pieces are now mixed in with her extensive collection of toy cars - some plastic, some the same cheap foam as the one from the scrapyard, some of them even felt or plush - which all appear to exist in the same universe, according to her.

"Uh - sure, how do you play?" Kagami asks, glancing at Daiki as if for permission, seeming rather startled to be invited. Honestly, Daiki is a little surprised too. It's pretty rare that she'll involve someone else in this particular game; she won't even bring the cars to daycare anymore, after one of her favorites was stolen. Huh. Good for him.

He shrugs to convey his approval, a nonverbal 'up to you', and once he's reasonably sure Kagami doesn't mind the grabby, talkative leech he seems to have acquired, he takes a seat on the couch in front of the muted cartoon that's been playing in the background for the past few minutes, crossing his ankles up on the coffee table. Kagami hobbles after him until Yui decides to detach herself from his shin - still explaining to him between sniffles which of her cars race and which ones don't - and sits down cross-legged on the floor beside her.

He lets her grab his wrists to direct his hands, and even boss him around, as she can tend to do, with total patience, rolling his designated red fire engine across the floor and imitating the sirens for her under Daiki's watchful eye. The cutesy talking animals on the screen behind him cast flashes of bright colors on his skin, and before long he's grinning in response to Yui's giggles, obeying her commands of "Faster!" and "Then it crashed, boom!"

Daiki only cuts in when she starts to get too loud or excited, reminding her to play gentle while she's not feeling well. Otherwise he just supervises, unable to keep from smiling to himself as Kagami swoops the fire truck across the edge of the coffee table with a dramatic 'whoosh', much to Yui's delight.

"So, um… I wanted to talk to you," Kagami reminds him, after Yui inevitably takes over the game, leaning his back against the couch and looking at him over his shoulder. "If you've got a minute."

Daiki sighs, but supposes it was just a matter of time before they got around to that. He can't very well avoid Kagami after inviting him into his house.

"Yeah, okay," he says, uncrossing his legs and setting them on the floor to sit up straight. Business mode. "What's up?"

"Okay so, what happened the other day…" Kagami starts, cutting straight to the point. He does that a lot, Daiki's noticed. Doesn't skirt around or sugarcoat, just rips the band-aid right off. "We should probably start with that."

Unpleasant as it is to think back to that day, Daiki forces himself to revisit the disastrous series of games; how he'd lost and lost, growing increasingly desperate and frustrated as his efforts failed at every turn... and how that must have looked from Kagami's perspective. He won't pretend he doesn't know what he's talking about, in the interest of saving time, but he does remain silent for a few seconds before responding, trying to pick the right angle to come out with.

"Well, I wish I could say you beat me at the top of my game…" he says, with a carbon copy of the usual smirk, "but I think you've still got a ways to go before that happens."

Kagami punches him, light and unserious, in the side of his leg, but doesn't return the smile.

"I know. I mean, I knew that wasn't your best, I've seen your best, I just -" he works his lower lip between his teeth, casting his gaze aside for a moment. "Look, I don't want to pry, but… is everything okay? Are you okay? After the game, you seemed so..."

"Yeah," Daiki cuts in. "Yeah, I'm okay. It's just... I haven't really been sleeping well, with Yui being sick and all -"

"It's not serious, is it?" Kagami asks, eyebrows drawing together sharply.

Daiki lets out his breath, and capitulates.

"She has pneumonia," he says, wincing to himself as Kagami immediately whips around to look at her. "But she's on something for it now, and she's looking a lot better."

Which is true. She might still be stuffy and lethargic and prone to occasional fits of coughing, but she's got at least some of her old sparkle back, and is currently pushing her cars around on the floor like she doesn't have a care in the world.

"Shit, man…" Kagami says, as he turns back to him. His expression is different now, his troubled frown easing a bit. "...I guess that'd put anyone off their game."

He's giving Daiki an out, whether he means to or not, so Daiki decides to shrug and just take it. If it keeps this short, and keeps him from having to bring up Tetsu or the ambulance, then it's probably for the best.

"You know, you could've just told me," Kagami goes on, sighing, "instead of trying to convince me everything was fine. No offense, but you're kind of a shit liar."

"I know," Daiki says. "Sorry. I guess… I just didn't want to believe it was that bad."

It's almost the same thing he said to Tetsu, and it still sounds like a pretty weak excuse to him, but it seems like Kagami is a little more receptive to the reluctant admission than he had been.

"It's okay," he says, folding his hands in his lap. "And, I mean, you don't always have to tell me everything, I'm just... not very good with being kept in the dark, you know? If something else is going on, I'd rather know about it."

Daiki supposes that isn't very surprising to hear from him, all things considered. And it's just about what he'd expected this discussion to amount to anyway, so he thinks it's in his best interest now to shut up, and count himself lucky to get off with a slap on the wrist, even if he doesn't necessarily agree with it. Anything to avoid fighting with him too.

"Okay," he says, answering Kagami's grateful smile with a hesitant one of his own. "I'll keep that in mind."

.

.

Less than ten minutes old, the baby was probably the smallest thing Daiki had ever seen in his life. Her head swollen and reddish, too big for her body; her fingers like nubs on the ends of her tiny hands that would probably disappear between his forefinger and thumb if he tried to hold them. The towel draped around her hid the remnants of the umbilical the nurse had severed a few moments ago, detaching her from Satsuki once and for all and transferring her to Daiki's arms, but she still didn't seem ready to join the outside world just yet.

Her face was screwed up with outrage, her eyes squeezed shut though her tiny, toothless mouth remained open, her wails of displeasure high and grating on his ears.

Not for the first time, he thought of asking one of the nurses, or Satsuki's parents, what he was supposed to do when she made that kind of noise - was she always going to make that kind of noise? But no one seemed to be attending to him at the moment. Satsuki's parents were at her side, talking to her in an undertone, and both nurses were currently in conversation, taking down the time of birth and filling out charts with Satsuki's vitals and whatnot. He was all alone with the baby he'd asked for, and he didn't know what to do with it.

A nauseating plunge of emotion settled into his stomach as he looked back down at her angry, wet face; a wrench of guilt, or maybe doubt… he wasn't too familiar with the sensation. Every step of the way so far, he'd been sure of what he was doing, or at least pretended he was; convinced himself, even if he couldn't convince others, that he'd figure this out, whatever it took. He was up to the challenge. But now, looking at the baby in his arms, tiny and brand new and already so full of raw, powerful energy… he couldn't keep pretending.

He had expected… something. He didn't know what, but he'd thought he would feel something else, something more, and he couldn't stop his agitated thoughts from spiraling out of control as the minutes dragged out.

What if, after all that, it turned out he really wasn't ready? What if this feeling of strange disconnect persisted, and he never felt all the things he was supposed to feel? What if it wasn't enough -?

Fighting down his feelings before he could spin out into full-blown panic, he took a deep breath and slowly sank into one of the chairs near Satsuki's bedside, settling the oblong, wriggling bundle into his lap more comfortably. She really was so much smaller than he'd expected, small and loud and helpless… and so much like Satsuki, from the round, rosy apples of her cheeks, to the faint strands of damp hair on top of her head, down to the little curve at the end of her nose. ...She was like Satsuki had been a twenty minutes ago, screaming mad and ready to let him know all about it, but as he lowered his free hand to adjust her towel, she was suddenly latching onto his finger with five perfect miniature ones, her cries dying away as she looked up for the first time with bright, baffled eyes.

His eyes.

Oh...

If someone had asked, he never would have been able to explain it. It wasn't the kind of thing that could be explained, and it sure as hell wasn't anything like he'd imagined; this instant punch to the gut, this forceful rush of protectiveness so strong and jealous that it almost felt like anger. It wasn't sweet, or gentle, or like any of the vague, sentimental crap he'd seen in movies and greeting cards... it was downright ferocious, and suddenly he understood all the parents who said things like 'I'd throw myself under a bus,' that he'd always taken as exaggeration. Suddenly he understood Satsuki's dad talking about instinct being all he needed.

He almost bit the head off the nurse who approached him, holding her hands out to take his daughter away. Distantly, he heard her saying she had to take measurements, and asking whose family name would be going on the birth certificate, and he swallowed the new possessive impulses quickly.

"Mine," he said, and reluctantly handed her over.

.

.

Kagami ends up staying several hours later than Daiki had intended to let him. He tells himself it's because he keeps forgetting to take advantage of this opening or that to cordially kick him out, but if he's being honest, he doesn't actually want to. By the time Yui has been changed into her pajamas and put to bed, he's curled up next to Daiki on the couch, and the charade is pretty much over.

The TV is flickering with a local college basketball game now, the volume down low, and Kagami laid his head on Daiki's shoulder somewhere around the second quarter, the weight of him warm and solid even through Daiki's shirt. Neither of them has said anything in more than ten minutes, idle conversation and occasional commentary falling away as they pretend to watch the game in silence, immersed in one another's company.

At some point, Kagami links their fingers together loosely, the casual intimacy of it pulling Daiki's gaze from the screen, though his thoughts are far away from the score… far even from the person currently leaning into his side, watching their hands intertwined in Daiki's lap. They look the same in the cold glare of the LEDs; it's difficult to discern anymore whose fingers are whose, and Daiki absently squeezes his own just to watch Kagami's react.

Kagami looks up, a curious half-smile on his face, and gives him plenty of time to see it coming as he stretches up to press a slow, crooked, open-mouthed kiss to the side of his neck. Daiki breathes out. Breathes in and dips his head, connecting them properly in a rushed, sloppy clash of lips, his free hand coming up to hold the back of his head. Keep them together. Keep him here in this moment where nothing else matters.

Time always seems to be elsewhere when he's kissing Kagami. Like he's pressed pause, and the only reason the rest of the world even exists is the need for air, the brief moments of separation where his lungs are working but his eyes are closed and his brain is full of static, too blurry and preoccupied for anything more complex than 'yes,' and 'more,' and 'Kagami.'

In his arms, he can feel him come alive. His lips parting, his chest stuttering on an uneven gasp as he surges against Daiki, straddling his legs. Pushing him back with one hand and bringing the other - still tangled with Daiki's own - down on the sofa cushion next to his head. Then he lays himself out, all hot and solid and wanting, fitting against Daiki just like a glove. It's exactly what he needs.

He's panting roughly by the time they pull apart for more than a single second. Kagami's hair is messy, hanging in his face, and he's all flushed across the bridge of his nose, his eyes hooded and glittering with excitement. Excitement that he, somehow, continues to find in Daiki. He must be the only one who still does.

Daiki can't deny that he's excited too, anticipation rolling through him as Kagami touches his chest; coy, familiar, deliberately hinting at things to come.

"So, you've been under a lot of stress lately..." he murmurs, barely audible over the white noise of the game, and a suggestive lilt comes into his voice as he brings his head lower, smoothing his hands over Daiki's hips and thighs."How'd you like a distraction?"

The reflexive tightening of his face isn't such that Kagami might notice, but Daiki still recognizes it for what it is, as well as the accompanying pinch of guilt in the pit of his stomach.

"...Not now," he swallows, fighting a defiant impulse that says, 'Fuck it. Distract me.' "Not while she's home."

Kagami's smirk is aloof, but accepting as he presses his lips to Daiki's collarbone. Daiki wants to put him on all fours. Wants to hold him to his chest and feel his steady heartbeat and keep him there until the night is over. Keep him from seeing the shame and exhausted stress all over his face. Just keep him… whatever that ends up meaning.

"Whatever you say, Daddy."

Daiki groans, and throws an arm over his eyes, "Can you call me… literally anything else right now?"

Kagami looks up at him, a concerned frown creasing his forehead, but it smooths out relatively quickly as he recovers his smile. It's smaller now, and has lost a good deal of its teasing slant, but it still seems genuine as he crawls up to face him again.

"Okay…" he says slowly. "How about Daiki?"

A short breath puffs out between Daiki's lips, a moment before they reach up to touch Kagami's again.

"Does that mean I get to call you Uncle Taiga?"

Kagami laughs, and kisses him back, long and hard. His tongue pushes into Daiki's open mouth, and he moans softly in the back of his throat when Daiki sucks on it.

That little sound flips Daiki's switch, and he puts his arms around Kagami's shoulders to pull him down, losing himself to the powerful heat of his body, his fingers digging into the back of his shirt. His mind is fuzzing but he's more awake than he's been in days, gasping raggedly as Kagami pulls back just to kiss him from another angle, one of his hands knotting in his hair.

Daiki can feel the fullness of Kagami's pants as he shifts up on the couch, and his own jeans are also getting uncomfortably tight as he grapples with Kagami's mouth, and would it really be so bad if they just-?

As soon as his thoughts start running down that track, Kagami suddenly withdraws, his breath coming in harsh pants as he raises his head, a furrow of consternation on his face.

"What?" Daiki asks, looking up at him.

"Do you hear that?"

It's difficult to hear anything over the labored rasp of their breathing and the background drone of the TV, but as he strains to listen, Daiki wonders how he could miss the more far-off sound of hoarse, rattling coughing.

"Shit."

He's up so fast he almost knocks Kagami's ass to the floor, and though he doesn't ask, doesn't even glance back for a second, Kagami still follows close behind as he dashes to the bedroom. He doesn't bother with the light switch, forcing his eyes to adjust to the dimness as he approaches Yui's crib, where she's on her back and spasming with deep, wrenching coughs, tapering off to pitiful little whimpers after each one.

"No no, sit up, honey," Daiki says, reaching into the crib to gently drag her into a seated position. "There you go, easy… get it all out..."

He keeps talking even as she shudders and heaves, keeps making soothing circles with his fingers between her shoulder blades to try and coax her to breathe. It's all he's able to do for her, and he still feels fucking helpless as he listens to her tiny wet lungs struggle. Finally, she draws a clean breath, then another, and the tension leaves her frame as she sags against Daiki's arm.

"...All done?" he asks tentatively, wiping her face with the tissue he fishes out of his back pocket. She nods into his elbow with one last cough, leaning against him like she's still half-asleep, though her face, or what he can see of it, is red and scrunched with discomfort, and he doubts it'll be an easy task to get her to drift off again.

Letting out a low sigh, he pulls her out of the crib and starts to rock her against his chest, murmuring little reassurances into her hair as soon as she starts to settle, and only pauses in his rhythm when he feels a hand lightly touch his shoulder.

"Hey… can I try something?" Kagami says, holding out his hands, palms open, all patient and unassuming. Daiki looks at him, first in surprise, then in a skeptical squint, but in the end he swallows the automatic reflex of distrust and carefully transfers her into his arms.

He picks right up where Daiki left off, holding Yui and swaying her gently from side to side, but Daiki notices he's also humming something slow and mellow under his breath, something that gradually turns to words he sings softly while he looks down at Yui's bewildered face.

"Goodnight moon

Goodnight stars

Goodnight oooold, broke down cars…"

His voice is hushed, so low it's almost breaking, the drawn-out, honeyed notes falling from his lips like he's hardly aware of them. His eyes are heavy-lidded, his gaze focused solely on the toddler teetering on the edge of sleep, cradled safely in his arms.

"I'm going away, I'm leaving soon...

Goodnight darlin'

Goodnight moon."

Daiki has never been any good at lullabies; he doesn't know any that haven't been done to death, and anyway, he can't carry a tune to save his life, but it seems like it's doing the trick as Yui starts to nod off against Kagami's shoulder, the lull of his calm, steady voice causing her eyes to droop, and then fall gradually closed.

He keeps humming and swaying for a few moments after she falls asleep, glancing back at Daiki as if waiting on his cue, but Daiki can't seem to stop staring at him where he's standing, his mouth hanging open dumbly. Finally, he snaps out of it and clears his throat, indicating the empty crib with a jerk of his chin.

Kagami nods and brings Yui back over to it, setting her down careful like a single move might wake her, and pulling the blanket back over her sleeping form. He watches her for a moment, but she's well and truly out, her breathing deep and uninterrupted against the pale pink edge of her pillow. Then he straightens and looks at Daiki, visibly hesitating, his hands flexing open and closed at his sides.

"I should -"

"You should go," Daiki says, dropping his gaze.

"I - yeah," Kagami agrees, with a little relenting smile and a backward glance at Yui, curled up fast asleep with her fingers in her mouth.

Daiki walks him out, past the pile of toy cars strewn across the floor, past the sofa and the TV that's still turned to the sports channel, the closing ceremonies of the game playing for no one. He doesn't say anything until after he's slipped his shoes on and opened the door, facing Daiki in the doorway with some naked, reckless hope in his eyes.

"When can I see you again?"

Daiki blinks, caught off guard by that and the startling note of tenderness in his voice, floundering uselessly in place.

"...I dunno," he shrugs at last. "I'll text you."

"Okay," Kagami says. "Let me know how Yui's doing too." Then he ducks in through the gap in the doorway, and brushes their lips together one last time, cracking a tiny, almost shy smile on his retreat. "'Night, Daiki."

"Yeah… 'night," Daiki says faintly, and closes the door.

He stands there just staring at it for several seconds after, digesting what just happened.

Shit… he thinks, his breath exploding from him as his fingers clench tight around the doorknob.

He's getting in way too deep with this guy. It's easy, too easy, to get complacent when he's around, with his earnest eyes and disarming smile, and the siren's call of his deep, alluring voice, saying all those things… He's gone and taken his eyes off the ball again, so soon after he's already paid for that mistake, and he thinks, with a sharp ache of regret, that this has to be the last time. He can't keep doing this.

He tries not to feel too bad about his decision. After all, a guy like Kagami? There's no way he won't bounce back, and probably be even better off once he's free and clear of Daiki and all his contingencies. But he can't deny that it's difficult, painful, to think of his face falling when Daiki tells him, his eyes turning dull and dejected, maybe even wet. ...Would he be the type to cry?

The last thing Daiki wants is to have to hurt him. It's already gutting him just to think about, but at this point, he sees no other choice. He just doesn't have the liberty, or the restraint, to make this work, and he should have recognized that from the start. Should have listened to his first instinct and stayed the hell out of dodge. Stayed focused on his committed path and entertained no sidetracks, no matter how attractive, and funny, and considerate, and god dammit...

Tetsu was right, he has been fucking distracted. And maybe it took seeing the look on Kagami's face tonight, hearing the avid longing in his recent goodbye, to realize he has to break this off before it gets any harder to do… but it's still going to be torture. There's no way it won't be.

Tomorrow. I'll tell him tomorrow.

Let him have one more night in this fantasy. One more night to think well of Daiki before he breaks his heart. For his own good, and the good of his daughter. Because surely, he can only keep falling like this for so long before he crashes and burns, and much as he likes Kagami — really likes him, damn it all — he can't let him be the reason for that final crash.

He closes his eyes, and locks the door.

TBC

((sorry_

Y'all mind if I just... post this as-is, I've been fighting with it for like two months. K thanks.

Welp, we're definitely in the home stretch here now. This is actually the truncated version of this chapter, I had it go even longer but ended up cutting some off for next time, hopefully to keep me from rushing. No sense trying to race to the finish, but I do need to call this one done now. (And it still turned out angsty. ...That may just be a running theme for a bit, brace yourselves.)

Next chapter will be the finale of sorts, and then I should have some kind of epilogue for y'all after that. I've also got a full soundtrack for this fic that I'll link once we come to the end; just something to look forward to after all the angst.

Thanks so much for reading! Comments, as always, are greatly appreciated, I seriously can't get enough of your feedback. See you next chapter! 3))