A/N: Truly wish I could tell you where the continued inspiration for this story is coming from, but here we are with nearly 4 chapters in a week. For anyone who has followed me for a while, you all know that if I am surprised by this. Thank you for the support. And just a heads up that this chapter will either make you happy or mad. There's no in between :)

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Alison knew what she had said to Emily walking out of that conference room over a week ago. She knew that her words were harsh, but she also knew that in the moment, it was exactly how she felt. The unease didn't reach her stomach until a few days ago when the actual completed paperwork arrived at her door. Over 50 pages of documentation summarizing a 4-year marriage, 8-year relationship, and nearly 20-year friendship in clauses and paragraphs. She read through the whole thing in detail making sure that Emily was receiving everything she had promised her. And she felt okay until reaching the last page. As the plaintiff, it was Alison's responsibility to sign first before sending the document to Emily. She had 30 days, but here she was already half a week in and the thought of adding her signature still made her sick to her stomach.

"I'm so sorry you're having to go through all of this…" Aria lamented to her sister-in-law while sitting on the loveseat in Alison's living room.

"Here's the thing, though. At this point, part of me really does want to sign the papers and be done with it."

"And the other part?"

"Remembers who I fell in love with."

"Al –" Aria pouted as she looked down to her lap where Alison lay her head. Aria's fingers brushed through her hair as they caught up on each other's lives since Christmas with Aria's kryptonite being white wine, while Alison sipped on an espresso. "You can't get caught up in what was."

"That's so fucking easy for everyone to say though. Think about it. If Jase, god forbid, ever did something so out of his typical character that he broke your trust completely, would you actually be able to let go of the man he was when you first met?"

"I mean – "

"And his lack of judgment would be one piece of the millions of moments you've shared together. You'd let one millionth of a relationship completely change your love story?"

"Sometimes it has to. This wasn't just a momentary lapse; Emily went out of her way for a better part of the year to hide the truth from you."

"It hurts to even look at her knowing that her hands have touched someone else.. But in that same breath, I still have never gotten closure. Every time I pick up that pen thinking that I'm going to sign on that line, I go back to a conversation Emily and I had before Christmas."

"And what was that?" Aria asked, bringing her glass of wine back up to her lips.

"I remember her saying that the best word to describe how she felt was 'heavy'. That it felt like she was holding up a boulder every single day trying to prevent my wreck and our miscarriage from invading the present. That getting engaged was her way of trying to move past it and forget. But that when she looked back on us, all she wanted was for a piece of our dream to come true before it was ripped away from us. That all she did in her silence was dream of what could've been…"

Alison's voice drifted off as she became caught up in her memory. Her right hand, which had been delicately perched on her stomach, had moved up to her face. The nail of her thumb now traced back and forth on Alison's lower lip as she thought back to nearly two months earlier.

"… she fucking kissed you, didn't she?"

Alison's eyes shot open, "No. No, that isn't what I said."

"But I know that fucking face Alison. It's the same damn doe eyes that walked through your front door after telling the rest of us that you and Emily were going to get coffee halfway across campus before it turned into a make out session. It's the same distant stare you had when you told all of us that you were planning on proposing. It's the same upturned grin you had plastered on your face when she walked down the aisle."

"Ar –"

"Don't fucking lie to me, Al."

"I never lied to you! We never lied to anyone either."

"You just omitted it."

"Yeah… just omitted it." Her voice faded again as she went back to the feel of Emily's lips on hers. The pause that lingered between their lips as she pulled away. The tenderness behind her touch.

"Snap out of it!" Aria replied, literally snapping in front of her friend's face to remove her from her trance. "You don't think it's at all sketchy that she kissed you while engaged to someone else."

"I'm her wife! And it wasn't like that, I swear. It wasn't passionate at all and lasted less than 5 seconds. It was like we were reaching an understanding of each other's pain when Liam passed. It was a desperate attempt to be the couple we were the day before July 15th. But now, knowing that us signing this paperwork means the end of us, I can't say with certainty that we wouldn't be able to get back to who we were."

"You know that this isn't healthy, right?"

"Of course it's not, but Emily's my first love. Like real, actual, palpable love. And even last Monday when she was apologizing much too late in the game, her eyes still held love for me. I could see it."

"You both can still love each other and be divorced. I mean, that's not how my parents did it by any means. But you and Em started as friends, that will always be there."

"Yeah, maybe we are meant to just be great co-parents. Maybe we are better off doing what's best for our daughter and not worrying about the in between. And then, we wouldn't be able to hurt each other again. We could both move forward separately but with a clean slate."

Aria continued running her hands through Alison's hair as she continued to talk aloud.

"But what if I'm meant to love her, Ar? What if she's meant to love me and all of this has just been a step in the wrong direction? For as great co-parents as we could be, maybe we're even better spouses? And what if all Olivia actually needs in her life is to see her moms be happy and in love?"

"Spencer, Hanna and I have a pact that whatever happens between you two will always be your choice. But I do have to be honest. Growing up in my home was incredibly difficult, and I spent so much time and effort looking for the glimmers of positivity in my parents' love to try and hold onto when I started dating. Which caused me to fuck up a lot and look for love in out of reach places instead of choosing to love myself instead. And I know that you went through that too in your parents' divorce. You and Jason were pawns in this grand chess match which left both of you to calculated and cold."

"Is there a positive somewhere in here?"

"Yeah, I'm getting to it. I guess I feared that we all were going to be doomed into repeating our families' mistakes. That everything we learned was everything we would be for our future spouses. But then, you met Emily. You know what I mean? You saw each other for the first time as something bigger than yourselves. And even though it took us a lot longer, I learned how to fall in love with Jason by watching you and Emily fall in love with each other. You both taught me selflessness and patience and how to see beauty no matter the difficulty in front of you. Seeing you two fall apart really made me question what I saw all those years ago. It made me question if my worst fears were all I could expect from in reality. But, as expected, you have walked through all of this with more grace and empathy than I've ever seen another human being extend. And that has everything and more to do with you and the person you fell in love with over 8 years ago. You fell in love with a woman who in her vows claimed that she never expected you to love her. She never expected to find anyone who could love her through the good times and bad."

I knew then that you love ferociously, and in a way I didn't know could exist. I remember thinking how fortunate your future spouse would be to feel that level of love in such a difficult time. I just never thought that would be me. I never thought that I could feel love like I do with you, Alison.

"And as much as it goes against everything I want to tell you to do. If you walk away now, which you have every right to do, you're deciding to no longer choose her, Ali. Signing on that line forgoes everything you spoke on your wedding day."


Your words were beautiful, Em. I know how worried you were that maybe you wouldn't be able to write down exactly what you wanted me to know for the rest of our lives. But you did it. Take a breath with me. Look around. Embrace this moment right here. The hard part is done. Getting here, in front of our family and friends, dedicated to each other. That was the hard part because loving you is the easiest thing I've ever done.

You came into my life at a time I didn't think that love, outside of myself, was possible. I love you without hesitation because when I look into your eyes, I see forever. I see the middle schooler afraid to put herself out there on the first day of school. I see the high schooler who taught everyone around her to be authentically themselves no matter the potential price it may cost. I see the woman who broke next to her father's bedside and put herself back together with patience and honor. I see the light I saw in the reflection of your eyes under that Christmas tree. I see the smiles shared between us when I wake up by your side each morning. I see the tenderness that exists behind every single touch we share.

But beyond that, I see our future. I see the way your eyes will glimmer when sharing holidays with our families. I see the hope that will exude from you when we choose to step into parenthood. I see the spark that we will continue to hold between us no matter what comes our way. In you, I see the best version of myself reflected back to me. I hope that in me, you see the same.

My promise to you is this: to love you and our family no matter the obstacle in our way. We made it through so much heartache to find each other at the end of all of this. And now that I found you, I promise to never go.

I'm going to end today with words from one of our favorite songs. "When I fall in love, it will be forever, and I'll never let you go. From the moment that you feel that I feel that way, too, is when I fall in love with you." Here's to forever, Emmy.


"And you stood there on that altar in front of me and your mother and all of your friends and accepted what she said to you. You accepted loving her no matter the obstacle and yet, somehow still fucked it all up."

"Jason, I – "

"It's not okay what you did. You promised me. You promised to come to me like a brother if at any point you had concerns. You asked me to walk you down the aisle, Emily! I gave you away. I gave you to my sister because in my mind, I thought you would be the last person to ever break her heart. But you were selfish. You were. You saw a woman sitting in a fucking jail cell pining to come back to you so that you two could try to start again and decided to take the easy way out."

Jason sat with his fists clenched in front of her. Starting straight into her eyes, Jason rattled off lament after lament toward his sister-in-law. And she sat in front of him without flinching. She took it all. She knew she deserved it.

"You're right, Jason. I was selfish and self-serving, and Alison deserved better from me. But I was wrong. I've apologized and all I can do from here on out is try to prove to her – and you that I am the woman Alison chose to marry. That's why I asked you here. Your sister accepted my apology, but I owe one to you too. You were our biggest champion and gave me so much insight whenever Ali and I would have a petty disagreement. But I lied to you, not intentionally, but I did. I promised you that I would never be like your parents. I told you to your face that, with me, your sister was safe and secure and out of harm's way. But I lost sight of that. I'm not going to make excuses for why; the excuses don't matter as much as the fact that I am the one who hurt her. My choices and my decisions are what caused your sister so much pain since she's been home. I'm sorry for that. I'm so sorry that you left her in my hands, and I dropped her."

Jason took a deep breath, flattening his palms on the table, "Alison is a better person than I will ever be. But if she's willing to accept your apology, I have to be willing as well. You ruined the best thing you will ever have though. I hope you know that."

"I do. And she's made her choice. She wants to be done with me."

"Emily, she wants to be done with you because you said it first. You're the one who decided that divorce was what was best for you two. Alison had no choice in the matter; she just wanted to do what she thought would make you happy."

"I know… I don't think I'll even end up being happy without her, though. I really screwed all of this up, but Jason, I need you to hear me out. Ever since I got word that Alison has the paperwork to sign, there's just this wall I'm hitting where I don't know how I can divorce someone that I'm still in love with."

Jason interrupted. "You got the two of you into this mess; you can't come back through at the last minute and muddy the waters all over again."

"How is she doing?"

"Not great." He sighed, trying to find a good medium between telling his sister-in-law everything and respecting Alison's privacy. "She's really torn."

"Between what, Jason? Are you telling me there's a chance?"

"With you and Alison, there's always a chance. Don't be an idiot. She's only ever loved you, Emily. Her signature would be letting that all go. You're basically half of her fucking life."

"It's probably too late. What if she doesn't…"

"Doesn't what?"

"Want me back."

"Want you back? Are you kidding me right now?"

"If she hasn't signed yet, then she's having second thoughts just like me. I just think we're doing the wrong thing."

"I don't know if she thinks it's the wrong thing, but anytime she even looks at the paperwork, she mutters about you not fighting for more. She wanted you to be happy with the settlement."

"Fuck… why didn't I see it before?" Emily paused, reaching for her wallet to pull out cash for the bill, "I need your blessing, Jase. I need to go talk to her, but part of me thinks she'll never want me back."

"Well, if that's the case, that will hurt like hell. But I think you just have to figure out what will hurt more, the potentiality of rejection, or the thought of never knowing her reply?"

"Got it. Do I look okay?"

"You're seriously insane, Em. You look fine."

"Wish me luck!"

Jason grunted before breaking into a smile. He knew that whatever happened would be a win-win for him. Either his sister would be happy again or Emily was about to get her ass kicked. And honestly, Jason knew he would be pleased with either option coming true.


Alison was busy rinsing out the dishes from her and Aria's dinner when she heard a pounding on the front door. Three knocks. Pause. Three knocks. Pause. Three more knocks. And then she heard her voice.

"Ali? Alison, it's me. Can I talk to you, please? I'll be quick." She sounded like she was in pain.

She dried her hands off before walking to the door to find Emily pacing desperately back in forth in front of her steps.

"Okay, good, you're home. Fuck. I didn't think I'd get this far. I'm out of breath. I'm sweating. My voice keeps cracking because I'm already fighting back tears. I'm truly a mess right now, Al. But I have to tell you this, or I'll hate myself for it. I thought about what you said two weeks ago, before my apology. I told you I couldn't fight with you anymore even though you wanted me to fight for more. And I told you then that I didn't want anything else, but I lied to you. I do want something else… you. I didn't want to fight with you because every single bone in my body wants to fight for you. I don't want to run anymore, Ali. I want you." Emily climbed the steps of the front porch slowly, stopping in front of a flabbergasted Alison, "I don't want a divorce at all. I want you."

"Emily…" Alison's face fell as she took a step backward, "I can't."

"What do you mean you can't? You pleaded with me to fight. And you were right, I didn't fight for us like I should have when you were gone. I didn't fight for our love or our vows or our marriage, but I'm fighting now. I don't care if I'm too late or look insane or am in over my head because I can't sign that settlement without telling you how I feel. I told you on our anniversary that I love you. I love you even though you hate me right now. I love you even though my apology doesn't change a fucking thing. I'm here to fight for you, no matter how long it takes."

She shook her head as she began trying to close the door. "Wait! Alison –" Emily's voice cracked which was enough for her to look back outside, "I get it. I get it. I've been a miserable wife and an even worse friend. But if you're saying it's over, I'll go."

"It's over." Alison put her head down.

Emily stepped into the doorway, "Then sign the paper, Al. Grab a pen and the settlement and sign it in front of me."

"I'm not going to do –"

"Then I'm here, and I'm fighting for you, babe. Go and sign the settlement or just say that you'll fight for us too."

"Please step out of my house. Please…" Alison's eyes welled up with tears as she closed the door in Emily's face.

"Fuck!" Emily exclaimed, sinking to a squat as she resigned herself to the fact that Alison would never be hers again.

Her world spinning as she placed her head in her hands, Emily wondered what, if anything, she hadn't said. How much of her life was she going to spend remembering this moment? On top of every mistake she had made over the past year, she had another to add to the list. It was her fault. And Emily knew she deserved every second of it.

But then the door opened. Alison stood blankly with a pen in hand, causing Emily to stand back up. As she flipped through the pages, Emily started repeating the first part of her vows, "Since the day you opened your apartment door almost exactly eight years ago, I knew my relationship with you would be utterly different from what it had been all our years prior. From that day forward, I knew that a forever love like ours hits you when you least expect it. But in taking the time to look back, I found that I fell in love with you long before my heart caught up."

"Emily – "

"Please just listen. Let me at least say this part one last time." Alison dropped her hands as Emily continued, "I cannot promise to always be the perfect wife, but I promise to love you endlessly. To fight with you and for you, but never against you. To be your biggest fan, confidant, and best friend. Thank you for being the woman I always knew I needed, but for a time, I struggled to see. I made that promise to you over 4 years ago, sweetheart. I knew then and I know now that you will forever be worth fighting for and you've always been what I need in my life. I just lost my way. I'm not looking to go back to before; I just want a second shot at this. We can start wherever you need us to, but I'm not leaving until you give me an answer or sign that last page."

Tears welled in Emily's eyes as Alison stared back at her wife. She looked different than the night Alison arrived home. Knowing her face inside and out, Alison traced her eyes over every facet of Emily's expression. Her lips were lightly pursed, being held together due to Emily's bottom lip quivering. Her eyebrows were raised, openly pleading for Alison to take her back. Her eyes were solemn and anguished, single tears spilling out every few seconds while Emily blinked to try and make them go away. She had known it since opening the front door; Emily was being more than sincere. She was being transparent for the first time since she had returned home. That combined with the text on her phone from her brother made Alison reconsider.

Hear her out for me, please.

So she turned back inside and placed the paper on the table in the foyer before turning back around to face her, "How about a date?"

"For the signature page or the – " Emily paused, starting to break out into a grin.

"Don't be a jerk, now." Alison pushed Emily's arm back as she shyly tucked her head. But as Alison made contact with Emily's wrist, Emily wrapped her fingers gently around it to barely pull Alison forward.

"Come here." Emily mumbled as she exhaled, wrapping her wife in a hug for the first time since Alison walked through their front door two months earlier.

And though nothing between them felt fully resolved or finalized, as they both closed their eyes with their arms around each other, they felt something they hadn't felt since the day before their lives came crashing down in 2015.

They felt peace.


A/N: I honestly don't know if I love this chapter or hate it. I'm sure each of you will have mixed emotions as well. So feel free to tell me how you feel in a review below. :)

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Love you!

secretpen28