Chapter 5

Better with You


May 2026

The door barely closed, and Harry's mouth was on hers. Pansy was startled by his eagerness, and even more surprised at her own. She threw herself at him, rifling her fingers through his hair. They lost themselves in heated kisses, hands roaming over their clothed bodies.

"We're still in the foyer," Harry rushed out in a single breath, before pressing his lips back upon hers.

"Upstairs?" She asked, instinct suppressing rational thought.

Harry gave her a devilish grin and hoisted her up, wrapping her legs around his waist. Pansy gasped in surprise. He carried her in his strong, cradling arms in hurried determination to her bedroom, slamming and locking the door shut. They made their way to the bed as Harry shrugged his jacket to the floor and kicked off his shoes, all while his lips barely left Pansy's skin.

"Harry," she exhaled breathily, his kisses on her neck dwindling her reserve. "Maybe we should talk first."

He nipped at her neck. "Or how about talk during?" he said in deep seductive tones.

"Cheeky," she laughed before her breath hitched as he found the spot right behind her ear that always made her melt. She steeled herself because she wanted to make this decision with a clear head. "Harry, I—I just want to be clear of what this is. Set ground rules."

That seemed to have snapped him to attention. He cleared his throat and pulled away from her, taking stock of their heated state—their clothing in various states of removal, her lipstick smeared, his glasses askew. There was a nervous look in his eyes. "Yes. Of course."

She gave him a smile that seemed to set his nerves to rest. Pansy leaned in for another kiss, and before she even knew what she was doing, she began undressing as she spoke. Starting with her shoes and socks. "Harry, I invited you in because I wanted to." She then pulled her arms out of her cardigan. "Maybe I'm emotional and a little nostalgic—"

Harry ran his knuckle against her cheek. "I get it. One step at a time. I don't expect that this will fix everything, but I don't believe it can break us any further."

"So, you're okay with this just being for the night?"

Harry kissed her forehead. "Let's just be here for each other in this moment, and we'll figure things out along the way."

With a relieved exhale, Pansy touched his face and said, "I'm glad you're here."

He turned to kiss her palm and replied, "I am too."

In a moment of tenderness, he helped her undress. Carefully minding her delicate fabrics, even putting them onto the floor in careful piles. First her shirt, then jeans. Pansy felt uneasy as he stared at her in just her bra and underwear, crossing her arms over her body.

"Don't." He took her hands in his and pulled her close. "You have nothing to hide. You're gorgeous."

"I'm not," she looked down and shook her head. "I have these stretch marks and saggy boobs, I haven't been to the gym in about a month." Her voice trembled as her insecurity reared its ugly head. "Maybe this was a mistake." She tried to take her hands from his hold, but he pulled her in closer.

"What you are is a woman. A beautiful woman." Harry pressed his head against hers. "One I should have been growing old with. I could have been there telling you every day how beautiful you are so that you'd never have to feel this way." He leaned in and kissed her shoulder.

"We can't talk about what could have been," she sniffed, small droplets blinked from her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. "There's nothing we can do about the past."

"You're right." He came face to face with her and wiped the tears away. "Come on. You've cried enough today."

"Isn't that the truth?" she replied with a laugh.

Harry then shrugged all of his clothes off but his boxers. For a moment, they just stared at each other in their underwear, a little unsure of what to do next.

"Lay down with me," Pansy remarked as she sat on the bed, motioning to the spot next to her.

He crawled across the bed and made himself comfortable as they faced one another. Earlier, they were fueled by emotion and lust, but here, the two felt comfort. Solace. They couldn't help but smile as they gazed at one another. They scooted in closer, pressing their bodies together. Warm and familiar, despite the passage of time.

Pansy ran her fingers along his arms and his back, then his chest and torso, feeling his muscles, remembering his body. She cupped his scruffy face and searched for his lips. As they kissed, the heat of their tongues building a fire in her belly, she could feel their bodies mold into one another. His hands roamed her skin, squeezing and kneading her aching muscles. She smiled, recalling the way he used to touch her.

There was a song he used to play for her—it was a lazy melody that surrounded her in warmth. The man's smooth, bluesy voice sang about lying beside his lover, exploring every inch of her being. Harry said that the song always reminded him of her.

It had been years since she was anyone's Wonderland. More like a long-forgotten playground, aging and rusting. But here. In this moment. Harry, with his gentle caress and kisses on her skin, she felt cherished. Alive.

She inched her fingertips under the waistband of his boxers, pushing them down, ready to touch him, while he reached behind to unclasp her bra. Her chest heaved as the pressure released, followed by his warm skin against hers. Without any reservation, her hand grasped around his length, curiously wondering if he was still the same. Her hand pumped him up and down, eager to feel him grow and harden at her touch. He was just as willing to explore her, only pulling her panties down enough to fit his hand between her legs. His fingers ran down her folds, teasing her clit, wanting to settle in her warmth, but met with resistance. Pansy could feel her body betray her, not as slick and inviting as in her youth.

Harry didn't say anything or force his way in deeper. He just made his way further down the mattress, taking her panties with him. He settled his face level with her cunt, his breath hot with anxiousness. When his tongue finally pressed against her folds, the wetness felt like a soothing balm. He gave several fluttering flicks of his tongue against her clitoris, sending shivers through her whole body. When she tried to muffle her loud moans with a pillow, he commanded, "Don't," encouraging her to succumb to the pleasure. He continued to lap and her folds and dip into her pussy, all while rubbing his thumb against her nub.

Pansy writhed and bucked under his gentle ministrations. His pace in rhythm with hers. She teetered closer and closer. It was all too much. "Stop. I can't."

"You can." His fingers dipped into her, pumping faster, curled up to hit the spot that she always had trouble reaching on her own. "Come for me, baby."

He called her, baby. She hadn't heard that in forever. If it was anyone else, she would hate it, but with Harry—it was a pet name he only ever used when they were like this. Nostalgia triggering her senses, a blissful orgasm rippled through her. In all these years, it was unlike anything she had been able to give herself, or even her occasional hook-up.

Her heart was pounding, and her legs quivered. Once wasn't enough. She had a taste of what it was to feel boundless pleasure, and she wanted, needed more. Pansy screamed his name and commanded him, "Don't stop! Don't stop!"

He eagerly did as she said, letting wave after wave come crashing down.

The proverbial dam broke—her cunt slick with juices.

Harry rubbed his fingers up and down her folds, taking as much as he could to rub on his cock. She watched him pump himself hungrily. As many times as she had just come, she still wanted to feel him inside of her. "Do you want me to fuck you now?" he asked with a husky growl.

"Yes," she begged.

He thrust inside of her without abandon. They both groaned, their senses overwhelmed with the connection. It wasn't just the diffusion of sexual tension or reprieve from the emotionally taxing day. It was a homecoming. Their bodies entwined in a way that hummed with magic and promise.

She had forgotten. All the years, pushing each other away. This magnetism, stronger than physical attraction or even their history—it was magic. Destiny. It was warm and all-encompassing. Every snap of their hips felt like atoms colliding and fusing. Pulling him close, Pansy wrapped her legs around him and wondered if their auras were as brilliantly colored as she felt they were.

With each passing moment, the walls around them fell. Not brick by brick, but an explosive shattering of mortar and stone. Years of animosity and reserve gone.

Harry pulled out and rolled onto this back. "Get on top. I want to watch you."

Pansy straddled him and sank down onto his length, taking in sharp inhale as he filled her completely. She rode his cock lazily, staring into his eyes brightened by the moonlight. Her mind finally caught up to her body. Countless moments convincing themselves they were toxic together, when in fact, being apart was truly the source of all their pain. They could have had a life together. A tear rolled down her face, angry at the lost time.

"No more crying," he reminded her sweetly as he brushed away the tear.

She bent down and kissed him, her hips still rocking. "Be with me," a soft pleading whimper escaped from her lips.

He sat up to meet her. His lips on hers, pulling them between his teeth, sucking on the supple flesh. She moaned as he ran his hands up and down her back. His fingers threaded through her hair, tugging her head back, leaving her neck exposed for him to nip and suck at her skin. Making his promise with actions and not words—holding her, encouraging her, giving himself completely to her.

Pansy called out every command as she straddled his bucking hips. "Harder." "Faster." "Yes!" "Don't stop." "Fuck me." Every thrust into her, pushing her closer to the edge.

"Are you going to come for me?" He taunted, swirling his tongue around her nipple, his hips snapping harder and faster against her.

She cried, "Yes! Yes! Yes! I'm coming—" Her muscles fluttered and contracted around his throbbing cock, bringing him also to climax. She could feel his cock harden and shoot what felt like neverending streams into her. It was a carnal instinct. Not just sex. Harry's seed inside of her—she felt claimed.

Pansy stayed mounted on him, her heart pounding and breath ragged, skin glistening with sweat. She leaned her forehead to his. Unable to form words, unsure if she wanted to. She had already made herself so vulnerable to him, and he to her.

Harry tugged her to his chest and gently rolled her off of his softening cock. He kissed her nose and then her lips, all with the tenderest of touches.

"Har—"

His finger pressed to her lips.

"It can wait until the morning." His arms wrapped around her, and he kissed her temple.

She nodded her head and curled into his embrace. Before she knew it, they had fallen asleep.


Pansy splashed water on her face. Cold. Cleansing. She rubbed her swollen eyes, wondering how much sleep she would need before the puffiness subsided. Staring at the mirror, she carefully patted her skin with the towel, and reflected behind her was Harry, still in her bed, still naked. She shook her head, trying not to focus on last night's events. Instead, she reached for her toothbrush.

Scrubbing away, her thoughts couldn't help but drift. They had said so much with so few words, but was any of it true? Was last night just comfort, or could they actually make it work this time? And what would Albus say? Would this help his recovery or make things harder? She had been so lost in thought, it was only when the toothpaste no longer tasted of mint did she realize how much time had passed.

Sipping the water from the glass, she felt him come behind her. His skin against hers, still sticky and smelling of sex. He kissed her shoulder and said, "Good morning."

She flinched at the smell of his morning breath. "Do you want me to send Fizzie to get your belongings?"

Harry covered his mouth and laughed. "That bad, eh?"

Pansy made a face and nodded.

"Let me just splash a little water on my face, and I'll go freshen up there."

"You sure?" she asked, hesitant to let him go.

"Yes." As if reading her thoughts, he added, "We can meet at that coffee shop before going back up to the school. Maybe bring something back for Al, Eva, and Nightingale."

She smiled at the thought. "I like that idea."

He kissed her forehead before pushing her out of the way.

Pansy scoffed playfully. Harry scrubbed his face with water, cleaning the sleep from his eyes, then rinsed his mouth. She handed him a towel, already expecting him to ask her for one.

Harry patted his face dry, then said. "I'll see you there in about 45 minutes?"

"Sounds good."

He gave her a quick peck on the cheek before hastily dressing and leaving.

A smile grew across her face as she stepped into the shower. For the first time in a long time, uncertainty didn't feel so daunting.


September 2024

Another September, another goodbye. King's Cross seemed busier than ever, but this time, Albus wasn't as reluctant to leave his mother. He was excited to see his friends, continue his Alchemy tutoring, and regain some independence. Maybe it was getting older, or maybe it was because he had a great summer with his mum, but heading off to school didn't feel as hard as it had in the past. They both had things to get back to, and it was nice, starting to have a life of his own.

Actually, he wouldn't be the only one leaving from the station that morning. She had her own bags in tow, ready for another trip to one of the international offices, leaving just before the Hogwarts Express departed. Albus couldn't remember if it was Milan or Beijing or New York. His mother's diary was impossible to keep up with, and he was somewhat relieved he no longer had to. He had spent the summer globe-trotting, tagging along as her "intern," and on the Witch Weekly payroll.

Pansy was far too busy to notice what he had stockpiled from apothecaries he visited at every one of their exotic stops. She may have thought it was all part of his intensive study, but Albus had motives of his own. James may have opened up the possibility of herbal relaxation to him, but it was Albus's own curiosity that propelled him further.

He flipped through his advanced potions texts looking for ways that sustain that sense of relaxation and calm, without reeking of smoke or smelling like he had raided a liquor cabinet. The elixir he had found early last year, Euphorus, seemed to be the perfect solution for him. By the way it was described in the book, it was the kind of high he was chasing. To feel light, and lifted from reality. It was said to balance ill moods and anxieties, bringing a wash of peace and happiness. But what really attracted him was that it was odorless and tasteless, and probably wouldn't send off any alarms to anyone around him if he was on it.

As much as Albus had wanted to experiment, he just never had the opportunity. While at school last year, he didn't have any access to the ingredients without his mother asking about his expenses, or dipping into the school stores without Professor Apostol knowing what he was up to. The biggest roadblock over the summer was they hadn't been in any one place for longer than a week. Euphorus was a complicated, temperamental potion, that took weeks to brew, exposure to sunlight for one hour a day, and required costly ingredients. But in a few hours' time, he would be on his way to Hogwarts, where magical experimentation was the norm, in a castle far too large for its student body. He already knew where he would set up his workshop—the abandoned girls' bathroom.

From the time his father had discovered it was the entry to the Chamber of Secrets, no one dared enter, even though the ancient beast was long dead. It still frightened people, wondering if residues of the Heir of Slytherin's dark deeds lingered. Albus found their irrational fears comical. He was one of the few who knew the whole story of the Chamber and the bathroom. It hadn't been Harry who had told him the stories. It was Hermione who had told him tales of their adventures. All those bedtime stories lodged themselves into his subconscious, only to surface and give him the idea of also using that bathroom to brew illegal potions. While Euphorus wasn't technically illegal, it really wasn't school-sanctioned either.

"You're awfully quiet," Pansy said, interrupting his thoughts.

"Sorry, Mum. Just ready for school, I guess." He shrugged nonchalantly and flipped his hair to the side. Albus smiled smugly to himself, reminded of how he didn't receive his annual haircut before the start of school. He should probably send a thank you letter to the stylist at the London Witch Weekly office who scolded his mother for even suggesting he cut his hair.

She must have known he thought about it because she reached to preen him, pushing his hair out of his face and tucking it behind his ear.

"Mum, cut it out." He shook his head, letting his curls fall in different directions.

"Alright, Alright," she sighed. "You're a teenager. I no longer have control over your look."

"Nope," he responded with a confirming grin.

She poked his side. "Darling, I'm so sorry I can't wait until the train pulls away. Especially after last year—"

"It'll be fine, Mum. I know you would be there if you could." Albus kissed his mother's cheek. His smile tightened as he refrained from saying or even thinking about his father.

"Hermione and Theo will be there to see you off." Pansy had also failed to mention anything about Harry, either.

"I know." He smiled.

They arrived at the gate and proceeded, as usual, the routine of dropping off his trunk an unconscious effort.

Pansy looked down at her watch, "Damn. I really should go now, especially with how packed the station is."

"It's okay." Albus extended his arms and wrapped them around his mother. He stood a head taller than her now, and kissed the top of her head. "Love you, Mum. Thanks again for a brilliant summer."

She squeezed him back tightly. "I loved having you with me at work. Maybe next summer, I could get one of your friends to take on an internship so you won't be so alone."

He laughed at that. "Maybe. That or you might end up with a sexual harassment case from one of my idiot friends trying to hit on the models."

Pansy looked up to her son with brows furrowed in contemplation. "Hmm. I think you're right. You are a rarity when it comes to teenage boys. I guess we'll just send for them for a long weekend or something."

"I think that might be wise." He hugged his mother one last time. "I'll write to you as soon as I get to school."

"And I'll send you care packages from all my stops."

"Don't work too hard, Mum."

"And you stop being so hard on yourself all the time."

He laughed uncomfortably at that, not really knowing how to respond. Perhaps his mother had noticed more than she let on.

Pansy looked down at her watch. "Shit. I have to go." She gave Albus one last kiss on the cheek. "Love you."

"Love you too."

With a crack, she Disapparated to one of the other magical train platforms. Albus turned to search the crowd for his friends, hoping to catch up before his godparents and Marina arrived.

Then he saw her.

Looking unlike she had ever looked before. Her long brown hair cascading down her back. Not in a plait or a messy bun—but swaying and bouncing, shining in shades of amber, honey, and polished walnut. She had turned slightly, not enough to see him, but enough for him to catch her smile. He liked her. He knew that. But this time...there was something different. Something more. He couldn't quite place it, but it made his chest seize and stomach flutter. It had been months since they had seen each other face to face, and he just couldn't wait any longer. Albus swallowed hard, his throat was suddenly dry as he approached her. "Hey, Eva."

She turned around in a flash and threw her arms around him. "Al!"

Albus was both shocked and relieved by her excitement in seeing him. It was a hopeful clue that perhaps she felt the same way. He wrapped his arms around her and inhaled the scent of her shampoo. Albus knew it might be too soon to cross the lines of friendship, but the way he enjoyed feeling her against him—he didn't want to let go. He released her, but not before running his hand down her arm and reaching for her hand. "You're here early."

His heart nearly jumped out of his chest when she squeezed it back in return. "Yeah. I was hoping to catch up with everyone before having to head into the prefects' carriage."

"I'm glad you did." His smile turned shy as he ran a thumb across her knuckles.

"Did you get any of my letters?" Her blue-green eyes were wide and hopeful. "I wanted to thank you for the little trinkets you sent me."

Albus nodded his head. "I did. It just sucks that every time we tried to text, we were never in the same time zone, or I was working, or you were working. I really wanted to meet up at Diagon. What happened?"

"Oh, my parents. They would only drop me into London on a day that was convenient for them. It's okay. We're here now, right?" Her smile was bright and contagious. Albus couldn't help but grin when he looked at her. "Where's your mum?"

"She also had a train to catch," he explained. "Hey, do you want to grab a compartment and chat before it gets really crazy?"

"I'd like that," she replied as her cheeks tinged pink.

They hadn't let go of each other's hands as they walked toward the train.

"Al." She turned to face him, still walking hand-in-hand.

"Yeah, Eva?"

"I really missed you."

Albus licked his lips and couldn't hide his smile. "I missed you too."

He helped her board the train, and they took the first available compartment. His heart began to race, finally being alone with her, but he felt eyes peering at them through the windows—a few faces he recognized, watching intently. Eva must have read his thoughts. She started pulling down the blinds, giving them more privacy. Falling into a natural rhythm, they sat down next to each other, and Albus took both of her hands in his. Their hands were warm, albeit a little sweaty. They looked at one another and smiled coquettishly.

"I thought about you a lot," Albus said with all the sincerity he could muster. "As great as my summer was traveling, I missed getting to see you and talk to you every day."

"Me too," she replied, sounding mournful at the time they had lost. "I would stare at my phone, waiting for a text, hoping you'd be up, able to reply."

He released a chuckle. "I had to fight the urge not to send you a million messages, knowing I would either keep you up or get you in trouble."

"I wouldn't have minded," she said, moving closer. "Al, you know I like you, right?"

"Do you know I like you?"

"More than a friend?"

Albus pushed her hair behind her shoulder, exposing her neck and jawline. "Definitely more than a friend. Have for a while."

"So what are we going to do about it?" she asked as her smile turned from sweet to something more taunting and alluring.

He leaned in, feeling her breath warm against his skin. Everything seemed to move in slow motion. He watched her lashes flutter, and eyes bore into his, her lips parting, anticipating his touch. Throat even drier than before, his Adam's apple bobbed beneath his skin as he swallowed. Inching closer to one another, after a summer of being apart, and even longer as friends avoiding the inevitable, they finally kissed. Soft and gentle. It was the type of first kiss he had hoped. Longing and pining finally fulfilled by the unhurried pressing of lips. Gentle smiles tugging at the corners of their mouths. The unbelievable satisfaction of something as pure as a kiss.

Albus imagined this was what Euphoria must be, as he felt lighter and pulled out of his body. He and Eva continued to kiss, opening their mouths, letting them taste one another. She tasted of something sweet, like fruit juice. He hoped his cappuccino earlier hadn't come to haunt him, but as she kept kissing him, he guessed all was well. His hands moved to her waist and hips, wanting to feel her curves beneath his palms. He had imagined touching her body, the heat of her soft skin against his. So many fantasies of her just like this as he stayed awake at night touching himself.

He felt her fingers rake through his hair, massaging his scalp and pulling at his strands. It was impossible for him not to grin. Yet another reason he should never have short hair. The longer they kissed, the closer he wanted to be to her. He wondered if it would be too much if he coaxed her to sit on his lap. What were the rules of intimacy when you'd just crossed the threshold from friendship to boyfriend and girlfriend? His brain halted, and he couldn't recall actually asking her.

Breathlessly, he pulled away from her. "This means you want to be my girlfriend, right."

"Yes, stupid." She placed her hands on the sides of his face and started kissing him again.

Albus felt Eva curl her body closer to him, pulling him on top of her. If he could snog her for hours until they reached the school, he would. Time was running out. Soon the train would be full of noisy children, and she would have to leave for prefect rounds. There were more things he wanted to say, but he knew there was more time for that later. At that moment, he just wanted to make the most of their time together.

His hands glided up her sides as he kissed her neck. The softest gasp escaped her lips, followed by a gentle moan. She tilted her neck, clearly asking for more. As he kissed and sucked at her skin, Albus felt his pants tighten. All her lovely sounds of appreciation commanded his attention. Things didn't get any easier when she opened her legs to him and ran her fingers along his neckline and down his chest.

He settled between her, their bodies lying across the less than comfortable cushions.

Albus had never had a serious relationship. Just the odd Hogsmeade date here and there, and the occasional snog session with someone at a party. He knew Eva wasn't that experienced either—this was all new for both of them.

Albus took a moment to look at her and ask, "Are we moving too fast?"

"No." Eva pulled him back down, eager to resume kissing and exploring.

At that moment, the compartment door slid open with a bang, and all the blinds rolled up. Marina looked down at their disheveled hair and compromising position.

"Ahem," she tapped at her new prefect badge. "I've come to collect my fellow prefect. And you—" she paused to roll her eyes for effect. "The Minister wants to see you."

Eva, flushed with embarrassment, slid from beneath Albus and started smoothing out her clothes and hair.

Annoyed at the interruption, he practically spat, "Can't you just say your 'mum'?"

Marina just sighed and proclaimed, "Oh Albus, what would your life be like if I weren't a pest? Come on, lovebirds. We have things to do before this train leaves in 15."

"I'll see you later." Eva gave Albus a quick kiss before hurrying out of the carriage, headed towards the other end of the train.

"Bye, Allie," Marina smirked, celebrating her victory in this little game of taunting him.

He groaned, standing up, willing his erection to subside before seeing Theo and Hermione. Albus reluctantly left the comfort of the carriage, already missing Eva. He knew his godparents wanted to see him off, and part of him wanted to see them too, but he felt these ceremonious farewells had become tedious. Another part of him feared his father was also there waiting.

It had been over a year since he had seen his father in person, and part of that was his own doing. He had told his mother that he didn't want to see his father during any of his holiday breaks. Pansy made sure of it, and he complied. He wanted his father to fight. He wanted him to exercise his custody rights. Sure, Albus still received the odd letter here and there, but there was nothing that showed Albus that Harry truly wanted to be part of his life. It hurt, feeling that rejection all the damn time.

"There he is!" Hermione beamed as Albus stepped off the train.

"You just saw me two days ago," he laughed in response to her excitement.

She pulled him into a big hug. "Oh, shush. I can still miss you and want to see you more."

In Hermione's embrace, Albus felt safe and loved. The momentary spiral of self-loathing easing some.

Separating, she gave him a good look. "Did you get something to eat? There's nothing but rubbish on that trolley. I can send for someone to grab a sandwich or some crisps."

"No, I'm fine," he responded. "Mum and I had a big breakfast."

"Is she already gone?" Theo asked.

"Yeah. Just dropped me off and had to run."

Theo then said, "Ah, well, we'll be the ones to see you off, then."

Albus then gave him a hug. "Thanks," he whispered in Theo's ear.

Theo released Albus and clapped his hand on the boy's shoulder. "So what was the hold-up, Al?" A suggestive smile appeared on his face.

"Eva," he said with a grin.

"Official?"

Albus nodded. With James in America playing Quidditch and his father out of the picture, Theo had become the older figure Albus had turned to talk about girls with. He really couldn't talk to his friends because they were even more clueless than him. "I didn't even have to tell her how I felt first. She said it, and it just happened naturally after that."

Hermione and Theo smiled and reached for one another's hand.

"That's usually how it goes. When two people have feelings for each other, you can't really hide or deny it." Hermione said as she rubbed Albus's arm affectionately.

The train whistle blew, and the conductor hollered to call the stragglers aboard.

"Gotta go."

"Wait, Al." Hermione looked back towards the gate. Albus followed her line of sight to find his father, standing anxiously, looking as if he didn't know how to proceed. "He wants to see you. Do you want to see him?"

Albus swallowed, not knowing how to answer. He shook his head, hoping Harry saw the gesture. "I have to board."

"Of course. Is there anything you want me to tell him?"

Albus kicked at the ground. "That if he wants to see me, he should try harder."

Hermione brushed one of the curls from his brow and said in smooth, comforting tones. "I know what you mean. I'll try to do my best to explain it to him."

"Whatever," he shrugged. "Sorry, Hermione. It's just—I have to go."

"Albus, wait—" Theo called.

He turned around to see what he had to say.

"We'll see you at the Slytherin-Gryffindor game, and we'll take you and Marina out to dinner. Feel free to invite Eva and Scorpius."

Albus appreciated the way Theo didn't make him dwell on his issues. He did his best to put on a happy face. "Sounds good."

He bounded up the steps back to the compartment, pleased to find his friends waiting. The train whistled its final cal,l and it was off, marking the start of another school year.


November 2024

Dear Mum,

How's everything going? Are you done taking over the world yet? I hope the international offices aren't giving you total hell, and you can finally come home. Hermione and Theo are coming next week for the match. Honestly, Slytherin is going to lose because the team is an absolute shitshow, but I'm hoping you can join us. I have a weird feeling that Dad might try and show up after what happened on the platform. I don't know if I really want to see him, so if you're there, it might make things easier.

School's good. It's a hell of a lot harder than before, but at least I like the classes more. No more wasting time on rubbish, I don't need to know. Though, I sometimes wish there were different sections of the library or the common room just for N.E.W.T. students. I get that first years don't know what is going on, but they're just so needy and lost, and it's so hard to be helpful and get your own things done.

And the part I know you're going to ask me about if I don't tell you...

Things with Eva are going great. She's...I don't know. She makes me happy and gets me. No, we haven't had sex yet. Yes, I remember the spells you taught me. No, I won't tell you when we're planning on doing it, because I don't know when that will be. Yes, I'll tell you when we are active. And if you do end up coming next week, please don't interrogate her.

But that's it for now. My letters will probably be more like short updates or longer ones every once in a while. As always...missing my phone.

Love,

Albus


Pansy smiled down as she read the letter from her son. It just astounded her how much he had grown and his maturity. In her eyes, she would always see him as her baby, but there in black and white, he was showing her he was growing into a man. Conscious about his goals, his developing relationship, and even his way of communicating to her. He was still honest and expressive, but he now had his secrets and wanted to keep them that way. It hurt a little bit being on the outside, but she understood. She had been the same way, except she would have never told her mother about losing her virginity to Draco Malfoy. What a horrendous thought. She snickered, remembering all 60-seconds of it. Pansy said a silent prayer that her own son would manage to hold out a little longer.

She pulled her calendar up on her laptop and looked at next Saturday. Miraculously, she was free, there would be the issue of adjusting back to the time zone, but she would manage. Drumming her fingers against her keyboard, not actually pressing buttons, she contemplated if she should reach out to Harry. Hermione had given her a slightly different account of what had transpired than what her son had told her. Apparently, it has seemed that Albus did want to reconnect with his father, but wouldn't be direct about it. Pansy rubbed her temples, weighing the pros and cons. From every angle, Pansy could only see the same cycle of hope and heartbreak. And as much as she just wanted to stamp Harry out of their life for good, Albus was still a minor, and his father still had rights, even if he didn't exercise them often. She released a long sigh, resigning to let things play out, whatever the outcome.


Albus woke up early that morning, more anxious about seeing his family than the upcoming match. Albus grabbed his belongings and headed to the bathroom.

After his shower, he gave himself a good look in the mirror and winced at the scraggly whiskers at odd lengths. He lathered the top of his lip and his chin with shaving cream, then scraped away the facial hair. Secretly, he hoped to one day be able to grow a beard like his father, or at least have some masculine scruff. But as of now, he felt like a boy playing pretend with his shaving kit.

Finally dressed, he was ready to head to breakfast. He kept it casual in a comfortable green hoodie, joggers, and oversized puffer jacket with some statement piece trainers.

In the common room, Eva had stepped in from the girls' dormitory corridors at almost the exact moment he had. He smiled, seeing how much effort she had put into her outfit for the day, almost taking a completely opposite approach. Her hair had been styled in big bouncy curls rather than her usual air-dried waves, while a little black beret sat on her head. She wore her best woolen coat with her prefect pin affixed to the lapel, while her house scarf draped around her neck in a stylish cowl. With her coat still unbuttoned, he noticed a green wrap sweater dress that accented all of her features, complete with tights and riding boots.

"Oh my god, I'm overdressed," she said in a panic.

"No, no," Albus reassured as he rushed to her. He slid his arms into her coat, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her in close for a kiss. "You look beautiful."

"But you're in a hoodie, and I look like I'm about to host a reception or something. Should I change? I just wanted to impress your mum and the Minister."

He brushed a stray hair away from her eyes. "You look perfect. My mum is going to give me so much hell for my hair, she won't be able to talk about anything else. I promise."

Eva's eyes widened, still concerned. "Are you sure?"

"Forget about my mum, you've already met her. You're a prefect, a representative of our house, and you're about to meet the Minister. You've done everything right." He gave her a sincere smile, hoping she finally saw reason.

"You're right. I am a prefect—"

"Hey losers," Marina announced herself with a yawn. Her hair was tied up in a messy top knot, and she appeared to have rolled out of bed and just threw on a jacket, some trainers and a scarf.

"What the fuck are you wearing? Are those pajamas?" Albus admonished.

Marina pointed at her green tartan trousers. "These? Don't worry. They're fresh."

"Oh my god," Eva went back into crisis mode. "I'll change."

"No, you won't," Albus insisted. "Marina. You can't wear that to the match. Your parents will be here, along with that, the press. Are you really going to do this and make them and Slytherin look bad?"

"What?" she scoffed. "I'm in House colors. And you're wearing joggers and trainers."

"But my parents aren't the Minister and head of the Wizengamot," he replied pointedly.

Eva stood silently, looking as though she should interject, when Scorpius entered the common room, wearing his finest, looking impeccably polished.

Scorpius took one look at Marina and said, "Nott, change into something more appropriate, or I'll have you put on probation. Prefects must maintain a certain level of decorum when we have special guests in attendance at the school."

"But—" Marina's face fell, having been scolded so publicly. "Alright, Malfoy," she resigned. Her eyes narrowed at Albus viciously before turning on her heel, heading back to the dormitories.

Albus rolled his eyes, wondering if Marina would outgrow this horrid mix of rebelliousness and entitlement. He turned to Scorpius, and mockingly said, "I think she likes you."

Scorpius blushed for a second. "Um...I think she just needed to be reminded of the role she took on."

"Or…" Eva began, "she finds being reprimanded by older authority figures sexy."

Albus barked with laughter while Scorpius's fair skin turned a deep shade of red.

Eva shrugged, pleased with her joke.

"Teller…" Scorpius paused. "Just you wait. Our next round of patrols, I'm going to get you back for that."

Albus threw his hands on Scorpius's shoulders and started pushing him toward the exit. "Scorp, embrace being a Dom. I think it suits you. Honestly, I think Marina could use a whipping."

"You know—" Scorpius inhaled and exhaled through his nostrils, "I've said it before, and I'll say it again. You're the worst."

"And yet, I'm the best friend you'll ever have," Albus reminded him.

"How unfortunate for me."

Walking through the halls, hand-in-hand with Eva, Albus was filled with so much pride and joy. It was a hard feeling to express. He was fully aware he didn't grow up with parents who loved each other, and his only reference of a happy relationship were Theo and Hermione. Yes, his grandparents had been together for over 50 years, but the marriage didn't exactly seem like an affectionate one. In a little way, he felt like he was on his way to succeeding where his parents had not. His time with Eva had been so fulfilling, he hadn't even thought about attempting to brew the Euphorus. The ingredients just sat in his trunk, safe in their glass jars.

After breakfast, they all headed towards the pitch, where seats in the Alumni section awaited them. When they arrived, they found several rows reserved for Minister Granger, her guests, and security. Albus saw Hermione and Theo waiting for them, but no sign of his mother. He was both excited and nervous for Eva to meet his family, no longer as his friend, but as his girlfriend. Their dynamic had changed, and he hoped his family would still take her in and be as kind as they had in the past. He held onto her hand tightly, and brought it up to her lips and kissed her knuckles. "You're not nervous, are you?"

She bit her lip in a way that said everything. "A little."

He untwined their fingers and wrapped his arm around her waist. "Don't be. They'll love you."

Eva smiled and leaned her head against his shoulder. "I hope so."

The adults stood, waiting to greet the students.

"Thank you for inviting us, Minister." Scorpius was the first to extend his hand in greeting.

Theo chuckled, "Scorpius, don't act as if we haven't known you since you were in the womb."

The young man laughed. "Sorry. It's just at official functions, you know?"

Hermione squeezed his shoulder. "We know you're doing your duty, but it's just us, Scorp. Are your parents joining us? I invited them but never got a response."

Scorpius forced a smile. "Not sure if they can make it. Mum's feeling poorly."

"I'm sorry to hear," Hermione replied.

"Have a seat," Theo insisted while gesturing to a designated seating area. There was already a group of other well-dressed students donning crimson and gold scarves. "We also had to invite the Gryffindor prefects. Couldn't look like we were playing favorites."

Scorpius nodded in understanding and took his seat on the opposite side of their rivals.

As Marina greeted her parents, Albus looked out to the crowds, looking for signs for his parents. There were just so many people, he didn't know where to look. He was really regretting leaving his Omnioculars in the dorm.

"Earth to Al," Theo called.

His head snapped toward his godparents, a little embarrassed by his distraction.

"Come here, Albus," Hermione said affectionately before hugging him, followed by a hug from Theo.

"Hermione, Theo, you've met Eva before, right?" Albus asked as he presented his girlfriend.

"Briefly," Theo replied as he presented his hand. "Lovely to meet you, Eva."

"Thank you, Warlock Nott." She took his hand and shook it, then turned to Hermione and shook hers. "Lovely to see you again, Minister."

"Mum on the way?" Albus asked.

"Yes," Hermione responded. "She told me she was about to Apparate to Hogsmeade right before I lost reception."

"Cool," Albus responded. Hesitantly, he asked. "And Dad?"

Hermione and Theo exchanged glances before she said, "Yes, but he's not coming alone. Ron and Susan are coming as well, but Teddy is also coming with his girlfriend, Victoire."

"Fantastic," he responded, the word dripping with sarcasm. Albus's stomach tied in knots, thinking of this much larger group and the new set of dynamics to add to the existing tension. Of course, a Gryffindor and Slytherin match could never just be a sporting event. It had to dig up decades-long feuds and put everyone on edge.

"We still outnumber them," Theo said coyly, easing Albus's tension some.

"Yet, you went for the neutrals…" Albus said accusingly, pointing at Theo and Hermione's lack of house colors, opting for shades of black and gray with pins of the Hogwarts crest affixed to their cloaks.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Alright, alright. Just sit down. The box is starting to get crowded."

Eva and Albus took their seats next to Scorpius and Marina. A whole row behind them as left empty, which they reasoned was reserved for all of the Minister's guests. Being high up in the stands, they felt the bitter cold intensify around them.

"Fuck it's cold, and I forgot my gloves," Eva complained as they waited for the match to begin.

Albus took her hands in his, rubbing them vigorously, letting the friction warm them. He brought her knuckle to his lips and kissed them. "Better?"

"A little." She scooted in closer to him and tucked her hands under his jacket.

"Here." Marina passed them a little jar containing a flickering flame.

"Thanks." Albus took it, and he and Eva wrapped their hands around the little jar.

"Can someone cast a fucking warming charm, or do I need to do it myself?"

Albus laughed as he heard a perturbed voice call from further down the bleachers. He spotted the source, and as expected, it was his mother. She, too, had opted for style over formality, wearing high-waisted olive green leather leggings with black booties and a turtleneck charcoal gray jumper, finished with a houndstooth cloak with a fur collar and matching fur cap.

"Your mum looks fierce," Eva gasped.

"That's Mum," he said proudly. Albus couldn't help but grin, watching Pansy reprimand the Ministry security detail and some of the older wizards. She pulled her wand out, demonstrating what they should have done ages ago. Upon her urging, the others cast the spell, sending warmth that radiated throughout the stands.

Finally appeased, she ascended the stairs. She waved at Albus and pointed upward, letting him know that she would check in with her friends first.

Albus nodded in understanding but continued to observe his mother.

"Hermione, you must insist on better conditions for this stadium. It's dreadful."

"Not the Ministry's problem, Pans," Hermione responded with a laugh. "Take it up with the Board of Governors and the alumni supporters."

"I will." She finally reached her seat and greeted Hermione and Theo with kisses on the cheek. "Speaking of the board...where are Draco and Marcus?" Pansy looked through the crowd. "Shouldn't they be here?"

"Draco might not be able to make it," Theo said in soft tones, "No idea where Marcus is. His daughter is Seeker this year, so I imagined he'd be here."

"I see…" Pansy's voice trailed thoughtfully. She placed her bag down and said, "I'll be joining the kids for a bit. Watch my things?"

Hermione waved her off and said, "Of course."

Pansy stepped onto the bench in the row ahead of them. Albus stood to help his mother down.

"Thank you, darling." She kissed his cheek and gave him a big hug. When she released him, she took a good look at his appearance. "I like this. Did we get this in Seoul?"

Albus nodded in response.

"Some of the pieces. A few are New York and Paris."

"Let's sit for a bit," Pansy said. She began tugging at Albus's curls. "This is getting trimmed at Christmas."

He groaned with annoyance, "I know mum."

"I promise to take you out for Thai food after as a reward."

"Deal," he agreed and affectionately rested his head on his mother's shoulder for a brief moment.

"Eva, will you be able to come into London over the hols and stay with us?" Pansy asked.

"Oh," she said nervously. "Maybe for a day trip, but my parents wouldn't let me stay with a boy overnight. They're not as progressive as you, Ms Parkinson."

"I see." Pansy paused as if looking for loopholes. "I would suggest staying with Marina, but the Notts spend the holidays at Crosslip Heights instead of the Minister's Mansion…"

"It's alright, Mum. Eva can come into town for a day trip to see me, and I can go and see her for a bit." Albus responded.

"Of course. We have a few weeks to figure it out." Pansy affectionately reached out and squeezed Eva's hand. "Maybe we'll invite your whole family for dinner one night."

Albus watched Eva shift in her seat uncomfortably. He knew how uneasy her family was around magic, so he spoke on her behalf. "Maybe we'll pick one of our favorite restaurants instead."

Pansy gave a slow nod of understanding. This was something Albus had mentioned to her before.

Cheers and buzzing chatter came from further down the stands. Albus stood up to see what the commotion was. A sea of spectators parted as special guests made their way through the crowds. Yelps of excitement and people asking for autographs. It was the kind of attention that only a celebrity—or hero—would receive.

He exhaled in a huff and dropped back into his seat. "Dad's here." His jaw tightened and swallowed dryly. He knew he shouldn't feel so anxious about seeing his father, but he was. Estranged. What a word. It felt eerily accurate right now. Strange and distant, yet part of him was excited and longed to see the man.

Eva squeezed his hand tightly, while his mother placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Do you want me to stay here with you, Albus?" Pansy asked, her protective, motherly instincts taking hold.

He tapped his heels nervously, trying to decide. Albus knew that he had to face his father sooner or later, especially when it was Albus who had told Hermione that he wanted his father to try harder.

"I'll be okay." The way he said it, was more of a personal affirmation than a response to his mother.

Pansy kissed Albus on the cheek. "I'm just going to be right behind you, alright."

"Thanks, Mum."

As his mother was taking her place with the other Alumni, his father had reached their section. Where his mother had been beautiful and stylish, his father was ruggedly handsome. No frills. A pair of old jeans with scuffed boots, a simple yet tailored double-breasted black wool coat, gray scarf, and woolen cap. Perhaps this was a sign of neutrality, but Gryffindor's prodigal son had returned and didn't wear a stitch of red or gold. Albus hoped that in some way, Harry was saying that he was here for him, and not some dumb match.

Harry met Albus's eyes and gave him a tentative smile and wave. Albus forced a smile, trying not to let his anxiety and other feelings get the best of him. He could do this. It would just be his dad—but it wasn't. For a split second, Albus forgot that Harry would be joined by his in-laws and godson.

Teddy and Victoire, Albus could handle. Ron was a whole other story. His wife Susan was kind and generally a peacekeeper. Al didn't know much about her, but he would put money on her being a Hufflepuff alumna. But watching the chubby, middle-aged man wrapped in Gryffindor regalia from to head-to-foot, waddle up the stairs set Albus's blood on fire.

The man was a piece of shit, as far as Albus was concerned. He quickly learned what the word "bastard" meant, just by being in his presence. Honestly, Albus couldn't understand how his father could still be friends with the man.

Without warning, he felt Eva's lips on his. He hadn't even realized how pursed they were or how tight his jaw was until he relaxed to kiss her back.

"Thought you needed that." She said softly after pulling away.

He leaned in to whisper in her ear, "I'll need lots of that. Maybe just not in front of my parents."

"Maybe you're right." A sly smile tugged at the corner of her lips. "I'm not sure being attached to your mouth is really the impression of me I want them to leave with."

"A few more won't hurt." He kissed her tenderly, distracting himself from the world around them, pulling strength from her. She was something healing. How he wished he could bottle this feeling she gave him, so he could feel like this all the time. He pulled away and whispered, "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Being you."

The blush on her cheeks and her slightly embarrassed smile set his stomach aflutter. Yes, he was happy his mother was there, but having Eva was something he never imagined he needed.

"Hey, Al."

Albus felt the presence standing over him. This was it. No more postponing the inevitable. He rose to meet his father, and Eva stood alongside him, holding his hand even tighter than before.

"Hey, Dad." His voice was shaky with hesitation. He noticed one of his allies was missing. "Where's Teddy?"

"Sitting in the Hufflepuff Alumni section." Harry pointed to an elevated area speckled in black and gold. "Don't worry. He'll join us for dinner. He's excited to see you."

"Cool."

"Wow, you've gotten tall." Harry, too, had his emotions betray his voice. There was remorse and sadness, having let so much time pass.

"It happens," Al clipped. Of course, he grew. It had been over a year.

"Hi, I'm Harry." He reached out a hand to Eva, not waiting for Albus to introduce them.

"Eva," she smiled cordially, albeit a little hesitant. Albus was thankful for her polite, neutral tone. Honestly, he wouldn't know how he would have handled her if she was either too eager or too defensive. There was enough of that struggle raging through his mind.

"Are you expecting more friends?" Harry asked, motioning to the empty seats next to Albus.

"Yes," he lied.

"Is it alright if I sit next to you until they show up?" Harry's voice was sincere, desperately seeking passage back into his son's life.

"I guess," Albus responded nonchalantly, as they all sat down.

"So…" Harry struggled to start a conversation. "How're N.E.W.T. classes?"

"Good."

"Still doing the Alchemy thing?"

"Yup."

"How is that? Is it hard? I was alright at Transfiguration, passable at Potions—"

"So I've heard."

Harry must have sensed Albus wasn't going to allow his walls to come down so easily, so he turned his attention to Eva. "So, Eva, what are you focusing on?"

She hesitated to answer the question, chewing her bottom lip in contemplation. "I, um—am still undecided, but I'm taking Charms, Potions, Transfiguration, DADA, and Herbology. Figured they'd give me the best headstart after school. To be honest, might even go back and take some Muggle courses after graduation."

"That's brilliant!" Harry brightened. "Are you a half-blood?"

"Muggle-born," she answered proudly.

"I had no idea...wow, a Muggle-born Slytherin," Harry said, the words foreign on his tongue. "But Muggle college. Loved Hogwarts, but definitely could have done with learning more maths and government—"

Albus could sense his ire building the more his father spoke. It all just felt so feeble and desperate. "Why are you here, Dad?"

Harry's face fell, watching his son already go on the defensive. "What do you mean? I wanted to see you…"

"Did you?" Albus scoffed.

"Al, of course, I wanted to see you." His voice was pleading, trying to make his son see reason. "You know there aren't a whole lot of opportunities for parents to come to Hogwarts during the school year."

"There are Hogsmeade weekends, ceremonies—" Albus looked to the sky as if searching for the words. "Oh, and you're fucking Harry Potter. I'm pretty sure you could have walked through those doors whenever you wanted to. Oh, like...after a near terrorist attack."

"Now that's not fair."

"You only ever want to meet somewhere public, where no one can make a scene, and you still end up looking like 'Hero Dad.'"

"I didn't set the rules, Albus." His father sounded more stern. "You and your mother—"

Albus clicked his tongue loudly in annoyance, cutting his father off. His jaw locked tight, and he began seething through his nose, trying to suppress his rage. Eva tried to calm him down, but he shook his hand from her grasp and shoved his hands in his jacket pocket.

"Al?" she asked calmly.

He gave her a warning look and shook his head. Letting her know that he needed to handle this on his own.

"Dad, let's be real here. You picked today because you thought everyone would be in a good mood, and if they weren't, you'd just soak in the hero worship. Hogwarts's favorite son returning to his old stomping grounds." He laughed humorlessly and stood up, licking his lips and shaking his head. His temper rose, and so did the volume of his voice. "YOU want to be loved. Adored. Made important!"

Pansy stood and put herself between Harry and Albus. "Hey, what's going on? Perhaps we can discuss this somewhere else?"

"No, I deserve this," Harry said, egging his son on. "Tell me, Albus. Remind me of what an absolute fuck-up of a father I am."

"You—" his bottom lip trembled, and his eyes stung, threatening to cascade tears down his face. But he wouldn't. He wouldn't give his father that satisfaction. "When will you stop trying? You didn't want Mum. You didn't want me. YOU WANT ALL THIS! For everyone to fucking love you when you had it. You fucking had it!"

"You think this is what I want?" Harry said accusingly. "You think I wanted to miss out on your life?"

Albus looked the other way, not wanting to read his father's expressions.

Harry steadied his breath and tried reasoning with his son. "You pushed me away. I thought that was what you wanted. It's what you chose—"

"THAT'S WHAT YOU CHOSE!" Albus was now screaming at the top of his lungs. "YOU PUSHED US AWAY MY WHOLE LIFE. I JUST SAID WHAT I MEANT INSTEAD OF MAKING FUCKING EXCUSES."

"Albus, Honey," His mother tried to calm him down. Pansy gave Harry a scathing glance and said, "Potter, you should go."

"No," Harry responded indignantly. "I'm not leaving things like this. Let's just go somewhere, the three of us—"

"Don't you get it?" Albus laughed with a mixture of annoyance and hysteria. "Mum and I don't need you."

Hermione stood from her seat. "Let me help. I have access to Apparate us to the headmistress's office—"

"No need." Albus decided then and there he was done with this conversation and done with his father for that matter. He turned in the opposite direction and stormed off, pushing his way past his friends.

"Albus—" Eva cried.

"I've got him. He needs—uh—just stay here." Scorpius said in a rush, hot on Albus's heels. "Al! Wait up!"

"Scorp!" Eva's call faded in the distance, drowned out by spectators.

Albus didn't slow down. He just wanted to get the hell away from his family as quickly as he could.

In no time at all, Scorpius had caught up as Albus was descending the stairs. Albus didn't respond but was thankful to have Scorpius at that moment.

"Here." A metal flask was shoved into Albus's hand.

"Thanks." He didn't even bother to ask what was in it, all he cared about was that whatever was in that flask would dull the pain he felt in his chest. It passed his lips, warm, sweet, and comforting. Firewhisky. The good stuff. Of course. He gave the flask back to Scorpius, who then took a swig of his own.

"You just left Eva."

"I—I can't have her see me like this. Not yet."

"I'm sure she could handle it."

"I know she could. It's just..." He shook his head, not knowing how to express himself.

"Come on," Scorpius urged. "Let's get as far away from this shitshow as possible."

The boys walked quickly in relative silence, the crowd drowning out any of their attempts at communication regardless. They hadn't noticed how often the flask had been passed between them. It was when they were stumbling back up to the castle, they realized how heavy and numb they felt. They practically fell into the first set of benches they found.

Albus drowned the last swig of whisky. "This was some good contraband. You're not a very good prefect, Scorpius Malfoy."

"Nope." He chuckled. "So what the fuck was that?"

He finally allowed the tears to fall down his face. "I'm just fucking tired of it, Scorp. I'm so fucking tired of not being his priority. I don't need to be." Albus it the inside of his cheek, desperate to describe the ache inside of him.

"But you want it?"

Albus nodded, his chest heaving, breath stuttered from his overwhelming emotional state. "I hate that I still want it."

"At least he's not dying," Scorpius said, the words bitter on his tongue.

"I thought the treatments were helping…"

Scorpius shrugged, "It's so up and down. Not even sure it's working anymore. Mum's body is so worn down by it all. You know, sometimes, I don't even want to go home. I don't want to remember my mum deteriorating. Fuck, Al. Do you know how jealous I was of you for going abroad every holiday?"

"I invited you—"

"You know I fucking couldn't." He sighed frustratedly. "Dad wants us to cherish every moment, but I just want to fucking run away from it. Just for a little bit. You know?"

"I know exactly what you mean." Albus reached into his pocket and pulled out a joint. "Want some?"

"Yeah, fuck it. Everyone is at the match." He took it from Albus. Using his wand, he lit it as he took soothing puffs.

Albus took a few hits of his own, and said with a half-smile, "I'm feeling just a little better."

Scorpius snorted before saying, "Fuck, I wish we had something harder. I just want to be numb. Or happy. Something better than this fucking hell."

"Actually…" Albus suddenly remembered something sitting in their dorm. "You feel like doing a little extracurricular project with me?"


December 2024

"Well?"

Albus extinguished the flames that had been slowly burning for weeks. He looked down at the cooling, swirling pearlescent liquid, its odorless vapors wafting into his nostrils—calming him, washing away all doubt. "Scorp, I think it's ready."

"You sure?" Scorpius hopped down from his perch on the window sill and bounded over to the small cauldron in only a few short strides. Excitedly, he examined the elixir, and the same pacifying effects hit his system. He inhaled even more deeply, letting his head loll back backward, savoring it. "Merlin…" Scorpius muttered. "If that's just the vapor—"

"I know," Albus said with a smirk. He pulled out a pack of vials, and with a few waves of his wand, the dropper caps of the dozen or so bottles twisted off and levitated in the air.

Scorpius helped, charming the liquid from the cauldron, dividing it between the small glass bottles. With a few careful swishes of their wands, they sealed up the vials and had a year's supply of the drug, or at least by their calculations.

The boys had researched some of the best ways to administer the potion. Drops seemed to be the safest bet. Easy to dose. Easy to hide. A drop here and there to take the edge off. Albus took one bottle for himself and handed one to Scorpius.

"So let's start with a drop each, yeah?" Albus stated, waiting for Scorpius's approval.

"Alright."

Carefully, they each placed a drop of the Euphorus on the center of their tongues. Almost instantly, the boys started to feel the bliss come on. Warm and comforting, their stresses and worries melting away.

Already in a hazy, dreamlike state, Scorpius smiled at Albus with heavy-lidded eyes. "We fucking did it."

"Yeah…"

They sat across from each other, waiting for the drug to really take hold. Albus felt relaxed and happy, but not much different than a glass of whiskey or a couple of bottles of champagne at Christmas.

"I think we need to take more," Albus reasoned.

"Just one more drop," Scorpius insisted.

Albus nodded his head in agreement. Just one more drop. The second drop hit them both faster. Without even realizing it, Albus dragged his fingers across his face, caressing every curve and divot, hollowing his cheeks, mesmerized by his own anatomy. The sensation of the short, stubbly hair of his upper lip contrasted by the longer hair of his eyebrows. He started alternating the stroking of his brows and the nonexistent mustache. "What do you think I would look like with a beard?"

He glanced over to Scorpius pulling at his bottom lip. "You'll never grow a beard...I won't either...our faces are too rubbery."

Albus giggled and sat closer to his friend. He leaned his head against the other boy's shoulder.

Scorpius didn't mind, and rested his head on top of Albus's.

"You're my best friend, Scorp. You're my ride or die."

"What the fuck does that mean?" Scorpius laughed.

"I dunno. Some Muggle saying. I think it has to do with motorcycles or sex." Albus snorted.

"I'm not high enough to fuck you, Al, if that's what you're asking."

"You're not my type. Too pale and you have a bony arse." Albus chuckled to himself. "But seriously. You're always there for me."

"Shut the fuck up," Scorpius blushed. "You're there too. Cradle to the grave. See, that's a phrase that actually makes sense."

"Isn't that the truth. My mum has pics of her holding me and your mum holding you the day I came home from the hospital." Albus recalled with a wave of nostalgia, despite not being able to remember the actual event. In that same album was a picture of his father holding him. His mother looked so sad. She had forced a smile for the photo, but her eyes said everything. "Scorp, we have shitty Dads."

Not even bothering to address the swift change in conversation, Scorpius responded, "You have a shitty dad," Scorpius corrected. "I have a desperate, heartbroken, distracted dad."

"A dad who is more focused on a dying woman than his very alive son." Albus could see Scorpius try his best not to let the animosity toward his father grow, but he knew that pain. Even if Scorp didn't say anything, Albus knew exactly how his friend felt.

Scorpius sighed in resignation. "In no way do I win in this situation, do I? I'm losing both of them. And when she's gone, who knows what he'll be like. He's already a shell of what he was."

"Yeah," Albus responded almost mechanically, his mind between conscious thought and the taunting euphoria. He squeezed his hands tightly into fists, then splayed them open wide. He stared at his hands, marveling at how long his fingers were and the tingling sensation that pulsed through his digits as he repeated the motion. Though he had been telling himself to succumb to the bliss, he wasn't quite ready to let go. There was more he wanted to get off his chest. "Sometimes, I think I ruined my mum's life."

"What are you saying?" Scorpius asked his response slow and lacking his usual articulation. "You're her whole world."

"Exactly." Albus buried his face in his hands, fearful his emotions would get the best of him, but the drug wouldn't let him. "Sometimes, I think she would have been better off if she didn't have me. She could have moved on from my dad, and I don't know, had another chance at life—had a whole family."

"Don't be stupid, Al. She has a family. You have a family. So fucking what if it's not traditional." He got up to his feet and reached for Albus. "Come on. Let's get back to the common room before we end up too fucking high to find it."

Albus took his friend's hand and shakily got to his feet. He reached into his pocket for the little vial. Holding it between his two fingers, he stared as it swirled and shimmered behind the clear glass. "It's so pretty…" Mesmerized, he placed another drop of the potion on his tongue, aching to suppress the pain of his emotions, threatening to seep into his bones.

Scorpius turned his gaze toward him. The boy's blinks slow, with heavy lids. "You sure it's okay to take more?"

"It doesn't feel strong enough," Albus reasoned. "I'm still sad."

"Me too," Scorpius added. "Let's clean up and just take more in the dorms. Then if we're too fucked up, we'll have someone to check on us."

Albus agreed, "We don't tell the girls. Just the guys."

"Why don't you want Eva to know?" Scorpius questioned as he charmed all of their belongings into a bag with Undetectable Extension Charms.

"Because...honestly—" he took in a deep inhale before hanging his head, "I don't know. I guess I don't want her to know exactly how fucked up I am. If she knew I was like this, it might scare her away."

Scorpius clapped him on the shoulder. "I get it. We all have our secrets. Maybe one day, yeah? If you love her, you have to let her in. Do you love her?"

Albus was silent for a moment, thinking about the question. He imagined her smile, her touch, and her laugh. Something deep from his gut bubbled up to his chest, filling him with warmth mixed with anxiousness. All he could think about was getting back to her. His eyes went wide in realization. "Shit. I think I do."

"So, you going to tell her?"

"About the Euphorus? Fuck no." Albus replied as if the thought was ludicrous. "But...maybe I can be more honest about the stuff up here." He tapped his temple.

"Come on then, loverboy. Let's go. By the way, is this potion making you horny?" Scorpius adjusted his trousers, his partially-erect penis causing him annoyance.

"Yes, but I'm still not fucking you, Scorp," Albus laughed. "But I hear Gemma Hale is on the rebound."


Back in the common room, Eva had been waiting in one of the worn, velvet wingback chairs, and looked less than pleased. As Albus and Scorpius approached, Eva stood abruptly and stomped toward them.

"Scorpius Malfoy. We had rounds tonight. I had to do them with Higgs. You're on patrol with Marina tomorrow. Where the hell were —"

Albus pressed his lips to hers, cutting her off, hoping she would calm down. It wasn't until he felt her relax in his arms and fall deeper into the kiss, did he finally speak. "It's my fault, Babe. I needed Scorp to help me on a project."

"And why didn't you ask for my help?" she asked pointedly, not quite as relaxed as he had hoped.

"I'm sorry, Eva, but it was a really complex potion, and he's number two in our year after me. It just needed someone with a lot of patience." Albus winced, realizing that didn't come out that great.

"I'll try not to take offense." She huffed.

"Let me make it up to you," he pleaded as he took her hand.

"And that's my cue to go," Scorpius waved farewell and headed in the direction of a group of girls sitting by the fire.

Eva pouted, "I'm still mad. Do you have any idea how much Higgs talks...about nothing?"

Albus laughed. "I avoid him at all costs." He pulled her in close and whispered in her ear. "Want to go to my room? There's something I want to tell you."

She gave him a suspicious look. "Must we be in private for you to tell me?"

"No," he responded, "but…"

"But what…"

"In my room, I can massage your tired feet from all that patrolling." He made a pleading face, hoping it was enough to entice her.

"Your eyes are all glassy. Have you been drinking or something?" She put her hands on her hips, waiting for an answer.

"Or something…"

Eva clicked her tongue, not entirely approving of that answer.

"Look," Albus reached for her hand. "Just come with me so I can tell you I love you."

"What?" She asked, her eyes wide in shock.

"Oh...I fucked it up. I was going to start with some conversations, a bit of a snog, maybe go down on you—"

Her lips were on his, interrupting his hazy train of thought.

"Albus Potter," Eva started, "I love you, too."

"So...room?" He asked eagerly.

"Yes."


May 2026

As he had promised, Harry met Pansy at the coffee shop. Initially, they had just planned on taking their drinks and pastries to go, but as luck would have it, their barista had made an error and prepared everything to be enjoyed at the shop. Pansy had a feeling that the girl had recognized them, by how awkward the girl was acting, and how much more done up her hair and makeup was from the day before.

Pansy sipped her coffee slowly, savoring every drop. Harry hadn't even touched his coffee, and just stared at her.

"What?" she asked.

"Nothing," he said in embarrassment. "It's just…"

"Just what?" Pansy inquired.

"I like how gently you press your lips against the mug, so you don't smear your lipstick."

She blushed fiercely. "Oh...that. I—I started that in school. Before I discovered long-wear lipstick. I don't even need to do that anymore. A force of habit, I guess."

"There are so many little things I forgot," he began. His lingering gaze and open mouth, looked like he wanted to say more, but didn't.

"I'm not used to your beard," she said, a flush of pink staining her cheeks.

He scratched at the scruff on his face. "You don't like it?"

"No, I do...it's just that…" she lowered the volume of her voice to hushed tones. "I didn't realize how sensitive the skin between my thighs is. Your scruff left some...bumps."

"Oh...OH." The realization came to him, and he flushed a deep red. "I—I um. I can start conditioning my beard."

Pansy bit her bottom lip, amused by Harry's shyness, and eagerness to please. "You don't have to, but I'm sure I could get you some product."

"Thanks." Harry looked down shyly as he sipped his coffee. Pansy bit her lip in amusement as she caught him sneaking glances of her over the top of his glasses.

"Harry—" she hesitated, "We definitely can't tell Albus about this. Not until—"

"I know, Pans." He placed his cup down onto the saucer. "He doesn't trust me, and I haven't given him reason to." Harry sighed as he reached for her hand. "Anything I will say to him will feel empty. All I can do is show it. To him and you."

A lump formed in her throat. She knew he wasn't an idiot. He knew the damage he had done, and how broken and fractured the three of them were, but perhaps there was still hope. That this experience would be the molten gold to piece the broken shards of their lives back together. Living through the hardships would make them more beautiful.

"Do you know what kintsugi is?" She asked.

His smile broadened and let out a small laugh. "I do." He laced his fingers with hers, wordlessly telling her she didn't need to explain any further.

Pansy's skin shivered, and it had nothing to do with the temperature. Her body and heart were letting her know that they had completely betrayed her judgment, and were his once again.

The barista returned with the rest of the order they planned on bringing up to the castle—three mochas and three pain au chocolats.

"Thank you," Pansy remarked. "Actually, could I get another one of these to go?"

"Me as well," Harry added.

With pastries and coffees in hand, they walked up to the castle—together.


When they arrived at the hospital wing, they were surprised to see Eva in bed with Albus, her arms wrapped protectively around him, her chin nuzzled against his shoulder. Pansy placed her hand on her heart, overwhelmed at the sight. Eva never had to prove how much she loved Albus. It was just there, for the whole world to see. Pansy could only hope and pray that the two of them had the strength for what would happen next in their lives.

Madam Nightingale walked toward Harry and Pansy to greet them. "Good Morning, Ms Parkinson, Mr Potter, did you sleep well?"

Pansy did her best to suppress a smirk. "Well enough, all things considered."

Harry nearly choked at the innuendo. "Yes. Sleep has proven difficult...Erm, we brought you a little something." He handed her the pastry and paper coffee cup.

"Smells delightful. Thank you," the woman said graciously.

"You let Eva stay with Albus?" Pansy asked.

The woman nodded her head. "She was here studying, and Albus had already fallen asleep. His body went into fits, so I told her to hold him while I retrieved extra blankets." The woman smiled at the recollection. "He started calming down almost instantly once she was under the covers. She was so sweet as she reassured him that he would be okay. I just didn't have the heart to send her back to her dorms."

"You're far more understanding than your predecessor," Harry joked. "There were times I could have really used a friend in here."

"Poppy and I have some very different views on what people need to heal," Nightingale explained. "Speaking of which. I received a letter early this morning from the Minister. She confirmed that the governors and St. Mungo's will be meeting here at the school to review the plans we discussed yesterday. You don't need to concern yourself with the details, but Albus, and other students like him, will have new facilities—hopefully by the end of next week. Until then, we're still figuring it out."

"And his classes?" Pansy asked.

Nightingale raised her hands, "One day at a time, Ms Parkinson. Right now, his health is the highest priority."

"Of course," Pansy shook her head a little embarrassed. "I guess I'm just already positive he'll make a full recovery."

Harry placed a hand on her shoulder. "We can hope, but we can't put the pressure on him."

She placed her hand on his, thankful for the reminder and support.

"Hey, you—" Albus's sleepy voice muttered.

"Hey, yourself," they heard Eva reply.

They were out of Pansy's view, but not out of earshot. "Sleepyheads, would you like some coffee?" she called.

"Mum?" Albus called.

"I'm here too," Harry added.

Eva was slipping out of the bed as the three adults came to the bedside. She had fallen asleep in her uniform from the day before, and it was all wrinkled and askew. Stretching her body from side to side, she yawned, "Merlin, this bed is small."

Pansy laughed before giving her a hug. "Thank you for taking care of Albus. You are too good for him."

"Mum, don't tell her that. She hasn't figured it out yet." Albus joked.

"Oh, I have. A long time ago. You're lucky you're pretty," Eva returned with a quip of her own.

"Here," Harry passed them their goodies.

Albus took a deep inhale of the mocha. "Coffee...How I miss good coffee."

Pansy smiled as she recalled an eleven-year-old version of her son complaining about how much he missed good food.

Eva placed hers down on the side table and started to gather her things. "Thank you so much, but I'm just going to take this to go. I've missed one of my classes already, and still need to freshen up." She gave Albus a kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you later. Love you."

"Love you, too."

She took the coffee and excused herself, before heading back to the dorms.

Madam Nightingale said, "Albus, I'll be back to run your vitals after you've finished your breakfast. I'll also need you to provide me with a sample to run some more tests."

"Yes, ma'am," he responded.

She gave them all a nod and headed back to her office.

"How you feeling?" Harry asked, with far less tension than he had the day prior.

"Sore. My head's pounding, and it feels like someone's squeezed my eyeballs," he answered honestly. "Only slightly nauseous."

"And the cravings?" Pansy asked hesitantly.

"Not terrible, thanks to this," Albus pointed at the drip in his arm, "but still there."

"It's a start, right?" Pansy said with optimism.

"It's something," Albus shrugged. "Have they said what they are going to do with me after detox is over?"

Harry nodded his head. "We don't know all the details, but an unused part of the castle is going to be converted for students who need some extra help, and you'll be able to move in there soon."

"Will Eva be able to stay with me?" He asked.

Pansy shook her head. "I don't know, but I would imagine not. From what I read, most rehabilitation programs are about overcoming dependency in all forms."

Sadly, Albus responded, "That makes sense."

"Once you move into the facility," Pansy explained, "I'll probably have to head back to London, too."

Harry must have noticed a look of panic on Albus's face. "It's all still in the air, but we'll be there for all of the family sessions."

"Both of you?"

Harry and Pansy nodded in confirmation. Not even thinking, Harry wrapped his arm around Pansy's shoulders as he said, "Both of us."

Albus's eyebrows shot up in confusion and waved his finger between his parents. "What's this?"

Pansy went on the defense, "We're trying to get along for your sake. We thought it was better to not be at odds while you're going through rehab."

He scrunched his lips to the side and shook his head. "I'm not buying it. I get the, 'let's get along for Albus,' part, but what's with the arm. You would have punched Dad by now."

Harry removed his arm in a very indiscreet, very uncool way, and scratched the back of his head. "Your mother and I are trying harder to be friends."

"I thought you'd be happy that we aren't trying to kill each other," Pansy added.

"I am," Albus responded, "but...you just seem so relaxed. And you came together and had coffee. Dad looks like he put effort into his outfit and mom doesn't have RBF—"

"RBF?" Harry asked.

"Resting Bitch Face, Harry," she answered.

"And you're calling him Harry," Albus continued. "NO." His eyes went wide as the pieces came together. "Did you...NO...Impossible..."

Harry and Pansy locked eyes, with shared expressions of hilarity and mortification.

"You did, didn't you?" Albus exclaimed. "You fucked. I'm detoxing, and you had sex?"

Pansy had to clap her hand over her mouth in order to keep herself from laughing. Especially with Albus giving her a wide-eyed, 'explain yourself,' look. It took a moment to compose herself. "Albus, your father and I are adults. And if we needed to comfort each other last night…"

"Enough. I get it." Albus threw his hands up in surrender, regretting pushing the subject. "Fuck, I'm going to be in therapy forever." He laughed before taking another sip of his coffee.

And there it was, Pansy thought. Her son's smile. That's when she knew things would get better.


A/N: I cannot believe how long it's been since I've updated! My goal was to get it up by the time my episode on the Wine, Wands, and Waffling Podcast went up, but life, man. Life. And this chapter is a LONG one. I thought I could wrap this story up in one chapter, but I have one more planned. For real this time.

For my Confessions fans, you may notice that I snuck in a kintsugi reference. It's really some of the most beautiful symbolism in our world. I just had to use it again for this story. The Japanese art of kintsugi teaches that broken objects are not something to hide but to display with pride. This traditional Japanese art uses a precious metal – liquid gold, liquid silver or lacquer dusted with powdered gold – to bring together the pieces of a broken pottery item and at the same time, enhance the breaks.

Also, some very, very important news. I started a podcast called Original Characters, where I chat with fanfiction authors who are now creating original content. We'll cover topics from fandom pressures, traditional and self-publishing, marketing, and more. I've already had on Lovesbitca8 and JLPierre, and have upcoming episodes with ToFadeAwayAgain, Writerspassion18, Olivie Blake, and more! I hope you get to check it out!