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Chapter 4
He is a Friend…
"Hey there big guy, it's been too long."
Russia stared, his violet eyes strained, his brow furrowed, as he took in the Nation before him. The golden hair, always with the distinct curl sprouting from the part of his hair. His bright blue eyes- though concealed behind the frame of his glasses- Russia could feel them on him, observing, calculating- piercing into his own as soon as he met his gaze. It took all his years of practice to hold his eyes steady, to appear strong and not show the chaos that presently reigned inside his mind.
"Why are you-"
"You look a bit livelier then I was expecting, I thought I was going to have to bust down your door and shake you awake!" Alfred spoke lightheartedly, leaning against the doorframe with his raised arm, his eyes peering over his glasses expectantly at the large Russian.
Ivan faltered momentarily, but quickly fixed his stance, hardening his eyes. "Why did you come here?"
"To see you of course! It wasn't easy you know… finding where you had run off to." Alfred straightened and pushed past Ivan, striding into the room. "And to find you here of all places…"
"I told you I need time alone!"
"And I gave you time… but don't you think it's been long enough?" The American glanced around the home, his eyes lingering, narrowing, before returning to Ivan, his momentary frown becoming a grin. "Come home, back where you belong... with me, Vanya."
"Alfred-"
"And not this…. place," Alfred jeered, "Why would you come back to a house that hurts you? You know I don't want to see you here."
"I can go where I want," Russia stated firmly, glaring at Alfred, his fists clenching.
"Well how about this… I want you, big guy," America purred, taking a large step to Russia so he leaned against the other, his face inches from Ivan. "All of you."
Russia did not resist as he was firmly guided backwards until his back hit the wall. He gave no response as Alfred guided his gloved hand under his shirt and leaned in, nipping the tip of his ear. "You know you miss me…" he whispered lowly, "miss this…" Russia tensed as a hand cupped him through his pants, and immediately he grabbed Alfred's upper arms, giving them a warning squeeze. The blonde was undeterred, kissing Ivan roughly, massaging him through his pants at the same time. Ivan shivered, his grip loosing, his eyes fluttering closed as he fought the desire spreading throughout his limbs. He moaned as a tongue smoothly invaded his mouth and he returned the favor, meeting Alfred's tongue with his own, his body melting into the others'. A hand began unbuttoning his pants, and Russia suddenly froze, his grip returning and pushing the American back, breaking the contact.
"Nyet, Alfred… " Russia breathed out heavily, his eyes wider than usual. "I cannot…"
America's eyes darkened, a smirk widening on his face as he licked his lips. "Your body is screaming for me to take you… Isn't this what we always do?" Alfred waved his hands to accent his speech, "We argue, you sulk, we fuck."
"Things are not the same, Alfred!" Russia began to tremble. "We cannot just… I tire of-"
"You know, I was surprised to see how clean it was," narrowing his eyes, Alfred put his hands around Russia's forearms, guiding his suddenly lifeless arms away from his own and back to his side. The flash of nervousness in Ivan's eyes made him smirk, and America leaned in again, sliding his gloved hands under Russia's white shirt, stopping at the top of his chest, one hand directly over the location of his heart. "Is that why you won't do me? Why you won't come home?" He felt Ivan's nerves under his palm, and grinned wildly, giving the stunned Russian a light kiss on the lips. "I guess it is rude to fuck while you have guests over."
. . .
Lithuania felt his heart stop.
He knows I'm here. Sweat formed on his brow as he kept himself still at the top of the stairs, trying not to make a sound. Why did he feel so nervous? This was Alfred. His friend. Why would anything have changed?
'Do not let him know you are here!'
Toris swallowed dryly, willing his flushed face to calm. Admittedly, listening Alfred make a move on Ivan had gotten him more embarrassed than anything- I should not be listening to this - and he had tried to tune out much of what he was hearing.
"Hey Toris, you still here?" Alfred's voice filtered up clearly from below, and Lithuania imagined him cupping his hand by his mouth, to amplify the sound. "Come say hi, I haven't seen you in ages!"
Toris sucked in a breath, his pulse pounding in his ears. What should I do? If he moved now, Alfred would know he was at the top of the stairs the whole time, in earshot of their conversation. Should I feint not being here, and stay silent? But if America came to the bottom of the stairs, he would see him regardless, Toris reasoned, and if he tried to walk further into the hall, they would both surely hear him, as the aging house was not sympathetic to those who attempted to sneak around.
He had no choice.
"Ah Alfred, is t-that you?" Toris laughed nervously as he peaked his head around naturally as he could, his eyes first landing on Russia who was staring anxiously in another direction. Lithuania followed his gaze to be met with Alfred blue eyes, staring directly at him- his features lighting up as soon as Toris made eye contact, a huge grin spreading across his face. Returning the smile, Liet continued down the steps, not taking his eyes off the seemingly excited Nation.
"You bet it is!" Alfred replied, waving at the timid Nation and rushing him along with beckoning motions. "Now hurry down here so I can give you a proper greeting!"
Lithuania picked up his steps- almost stumbling at the bottom but managing to catch himself- and there he stood before Alfred, taking him in. How long had it been since he had last seen him, in person? It had been years…. But how many? How long had he been ignoring the world, since the two of them had taken over?
"It's good to see you again… Alfred." His speech was timid, unsure. This was his friend, a close friend. Alfred had taken him in after World War I, given him a job when he was nearly broke. Let him live in his house. They had shared coffee, time, stories of the past, hopes for the future, happiness and even fear- Lithuania had to sleep in the bed with the blond more than once due to the horror movies Alfred insisted they watch, but could not handle afterwards. And Alfred had listened closely when Toris had needed it most, despite the other's short attention span. It had been close to heaven in that home, the kindness America had showed him like nothing the small Nation had experienced before. Afterwards they had remained close, Alfred always insisting he visit, inviting him to parties, even telling him his deepest feelings and personal secrets- things that, only someone like Lithuania could possibly understand- he would say.
Was that the same man he stared at now? This America felt overbearing (a dark overbearing, different from his overbearingly enthusiastic self from before), and Lithuania could not help but feel nervous. But was that all because of Russia's reactions, or his own intuition? He knew both of them had done terrible things, knew they were both responsible for everything that had happened. For the war, the takeovers, and the bands the whole world was forced to wear. But… Lithuania thought back to the broadcasts, to Russia saying they had to comply, to the day his flag was replaced with one that indicated he now was nothing more than a region of the Russian side of the American-Russia super alliance- a giant red star now covered his tricolor yellow green and red-
Lithuania felt faint, but suddenly was grabbed up in strong arms and hugged mercilessly, his hair rubbed fondly by knuckles that dug playfully into his head. Toris whined but ultimately did not fight against the forced affection, instead returning the hug with a gentle one of his own, the familiar feel and smell of the leather bomber jacket bringing a slight smile to his face. He glanced up for a moment past the broad shoulders with black fur lining-the feeling of being watched drawing his attention- and his eyes made contact with intense violet, which appeared to be staring hard at Alfred, boring a hole into the back of his head with an unreadable expression.
"I missed you, Toris!" America gave a final squeeze and released the smaller nation, patting him on the back. "I hope you are doing well, I've been too busy to visit!"
The voice drew Liet's attention and he finally stepped back and out of Alfred's arms, smiling up at the blond fondly, but guarded. "I understand… you've got a lot to deal with, taking care of such a large Nation…" Did that come out with a slight bite? Lithuania hoped not. Alfred grinned down at him, his glasses catching the reflection of the light.
Lithuania felt uneasy, and suddenly small. This was America. The superpower. Alfred turned around to Russia suddenly-
"Hey, let's all sit down and catch up!" –
And Lithuania was reminded that, things had changed. There was no longer a 50 on the back of Alfred's jacket, a representation of the fifty states that once made up his country. A 50 that had been draped on the Lithuanian's own back more than once, when Alfred had selflessly placed the jacket around his shoulders to shield him from the cold, or as an obvious prod to Russia when the two Nations were fighting a battle of spoken jabs, glares, and harmless mischiefs trying to bring the other down.
No.
Now there was a globe.
Lithuania swallowed, but managed a smile when Alfred turned back around, nodding his head. "Y-yes, that sounds wonderful."
This was America. And Russia. The two countries who controlled the entire planet, ruled over every Nation and person inhabiting it. And Lithuania sat between them- Alfred to his right, sitting on the same camel back style sofa he sat upon, near enough that Liet could reach out and touch him, and Ivan in a chair across to his left. Toris had never felt so small, so insignificant.
I should not be here.
But they… -Alfred was his friend. More than a friend. And Ivan…
Lithuania swallowed dryly, trying to keep his breathing steady.
"So while you've been gone…"
The air felt tense, almost palpable. Alfred smiled and joked, talked about silly, trivial things- like how with Russia away, he had no one to play video games with- Japan, the only one who could play with remotely the same intensity as Ivan, was too "busy" and Canada, well, he was no fun. (Lithuania almost grinned to himself at that one, he knew the reason Alfred did not like to play with Matthew was because the brother tended to beat him in games more than he liked to admit.) Yet Ivan hardly spoke, instead he sat tensely (but more relaxed than Lithuania), and listened to Alfred, his face unreadable. Every now and then, his gaze would move to Toris, and the smaller nation felt as though Alfred's eyes would follow.
It was unnerving.
"So Toris, what have you been up to?" America asked casually, draping his arm across the back of the sofa, his gaze switching to Liet, with a side glance to the Russian.
Lithuania tensed, clenching his fists which rested atop his legs. "I… you know… j-just… taking care of my people." Doing what little I can.
Alfred seemed disinterested in the brunet's reply, only grunting in response. "Well that can't be all, aren't you doing anything… more exciting?"
Trying to live! He felt red flush across his face as he bowed his head, shaking it slowly. Think of something… think of something… "S-sometimes I talk to Raivis and Eduard… and Feliks visits occasionally…"
"And how are they doing?"
"…" Toris opened his mouth to reply but closed it, biting his lip. He could not say what he wanted to say- that they were all miserable- because… why? Was he afraid of hurting Ivan's feelings, or even Alfred's? Afraid they would not like his answer? That despite everything they had done to try and help-
No. They knew the damage they caused. They were aware, knew perfectly well-
… Was he just scared?
"You know you can talk to me, Toris."
The brunet looked up slowly- first glancing at Russia who was staring at Alfred- and then turned to the blond, smiling carefully. "T-they are… getting by. I think one of Eduard's mochis have been giving him a hard time… something about bulling the others," he finished with a half chuckle, letting out a relieved sigh when Alfred grinned in response.
"Anyone else..?"
Lithuania tilted his head. "Else..? You mean… ne, I have not seen anyone else recently… I usually just stay in Vilnius."
Alfred nodded, seemingly satisfied with his answer. "It's been years since either I or Ivan have seen you like this… I thought you would never leave Lithuania again."
Out of the corner of his eye, Liet saw Russia go rigid. "Nyet Alfred, that is enough!"
I thought I would not, either.
America chuckled. "What's wrong big guy? I'm just happy to see Toris again, aren't you?"
Ivan looked like he took a blow to the chest, his eyes glowering. "…Da."
The two Nations stared each other down, Alfred almost looking smug as he crossed his legs, resting his ankle above his knee, and Ivan keeping his expression undecipherable, gripping his armrests with force only close observation could detect.
Lithuania felt increasingly unconformable.
"I- I am getting hungry, so I'm going to go get d-dinner started. What would you both like?"
The tension seemed to break and Ivan turned to Lithuania, concern on his face. "You do not need to cook for us, it is not your duty."
Toris nodded, giving the nation a small smile as he got up and walked behind the couch. "I know-"
"Oh Toris's home cooking, my favorite! It has been so long!" America straightened up, excitement on his face, as he turned back to face the small brunet behind him.
Chuckling, Liet continued, "I do not mind Ivan, I want to." He nodded towards the two Nations and started toward the kitchen.
"Hamburgers!"
Lithuania paused, turning back to Alfred.
"Make hamburgers, pleeease Toris?" The blond put both his hands on the rim of the couch, staring at Liet with eyes akin to a puppy.
It was not hard to imagine America with an enthusiastically wagging tail behind him. Toris furrowed his brows, "But I… do not have all the ingredients…"
Alfred rolled his eyes. "It'll just take a sec to get them, lighten up," he chuckled. "Why don't you order what we need, Ivan?"
"I do not have a transport box installed here…" the Russian replied hesitantly, "we will have to get the food delivered…"
America laughed. "You act like that's a problem." Standing up suddenly, Alfred made his way behind Ivan, gripping his shoulders and resting his chin on the top of his head with a childlike pout. "I'm huuungry," he drawled, running his gloved hands down the Russian's sleeved arms, his face coming to rest beside Russia's, his lips by his ear. "If you're worried about your little… connectivity problem…." the blond continued lowly, pulling up the sleeve of Ivan's left arm to reveal the metal band, "I already took care of that for you." Pushing the main button on the band, the blue computer screen rose, and the visibly tense Russian's eyes moved to the screen, watching as America typed in a wide range of foods from ground meat to fresh tomatoes.
Lithuania watched the whole exchange anxiously, feeling almost out of body watching the two Nations interact as though he was not even present. Alfred fixed the communications in the house? …How… When..? Toris considered slowly backing out of the room.
"You order will arrive in 1 minutes and 34 seconds. Thank you for choosing ASH Food and Delivery Services."
"See? No problem," the American confirmed with a grin, lingering only a moment before returning to his seat, rubbing his hands together with excitement. "This is going to be great!"
It must be nice having so many food options… Liet thought with a pang of jealously, though he was eager to try cooking something different.
After a moment of silence Alfred spoke again, this time turning to Lithuania who had not moved from his stance behind them. "So you enjoying your new tech at home? I know this guy," he gestured to Russia with his thumb, "was pretty insistent on getting you the best of the best…"
"I…" Liet could feel himself tensing. No… they still haven't… Russia still hadn't…. Some of my people still go without! "I can't bring myself to…. Use it much, b-but it…" Lithuania forced himself to smile, "works well… for me, at least." He saw Ivan frown out of the corner of his eye and Toris turned his head away, letting out a slow breath to keep his frustrations at bay. "It would be nice if…" I hope I am not about to regret this… "all of my—"
"Your order has arrived," a pleasant female voice spoke from Ivan's arm, the band came to life with a ding and a green glow.
Lithuania let out a shaky breath, the voice having startled him from his resolute state of mind.
"What was that, Toris?"
"Ahh, n-nothing, Alfred… I'll get the delivery."
Don't be stupid. Lithuania thought as he opened the door, seeing the daunting ASH robot taking up the entrance and staring him down with its two different colored eyes. What difference would asking that make?
"Delivery for Ivan Braginsky."
Toris had to hold back a flinch as the white robot lifted its arms, holding out a clear green tinted box.
"Th-thank you," Liet stammered as he carefully took the box, his arms unsteady as memories of his recent dream flooded his mind. Quickly he shut the door, the bright red and blue eyes the last thing he saw before the door cut off the world outside.
. . .
He had gotten out of there hastily- almost tripping on his way to the kitchen, not wanting Alfred or Ivan to see how much the robot affected him.
After steadying himself, taking deep breaths before the ingredients laid out before him, Toris got to work. It had been so long since the Baltic had cooked such an intricate meal. He worried the American would not be pleased, yet before he had even properly swallowed his first bite, Alfred had already praised his work.
" This is way nicer than the Mickey D's my bots make for me!"
"R-really?" Toris questioned from his spot at the dinner table, blush faintly evident on his cheeks from the praise.
"Yeah, Ivan, don't you think it's good?" America looked across the table at the tense Russian, his eyes sparkling.
"Da… it is..." Russia offered, though only a single bite had been taken of his food. The large nation was more preoccupied with watching Alfred's every move, and taking swigs of the already half empty bottle of vodka by his plate.
" I have to admit… noting truly compares to Toris's cooking." The blond continued, grinning at Lithuania before turning toward the Russian. "I really have missed it. No wonder you want him here!" Alfred let out a laugh.
Russia paused, his fist tightening beside his plate. "Alfred… Toris has not been here long. He only visits."
"Of course, of course!" America smirked, his eyes glancing toward the brunette fondly, his glasses catching the glow of the overhead light. "Stay as long as you like Toris… I'm sure Lithuania can handle itself without you for a little while."
Toris felt his insides churn. Can it? Why did that sound so foreboding? Should I leave? No… I can't… not until something is resolved.
"He will leave soon, I am sure," Ivan cut in before the brunette could answer, the sadness that flashed across his face quickly turned to determination as he glanced at Liet, violet eyes pleading.
He wants me to leave? Lithuania furrowed his brows. "I-I… don't want t-to impose…" Is this because Alfred is here… or because he wants to be alone with him?
"Nonsense!" America exclaimed with a full mouth, having just shoved the last of his hamburger inside. He rose abruptly and headed over to Toris, plopping down in the empty chair beside him and pulling him close in a one-armed embrace. "I only-" the blond swallowed his bite with a large gulp, "-just got to see you! Don't leave yet! "
"R-right," Toris could feel the familiar heat radiating off the American, the clutch of the fingers around his shoulder as the other pulled him close. "I do want to… catch up a bit." Lithuania smiled, reminded of a time when they sat side by side, sipping coffee in the garden, nothing but peace on his mind. A time when he trusted Alfred completely, when the American was warmest and most welcoming person in his life.
That was all he wanted to think about.
Where were those times now?
Hello! Anyone still there...?
Surprisingly, I never left.
Here is an update after about 5 years! Will there be more? I hope so. I lost a lot of motivation to write after finally moving out of a stressful home environment and also I escaped the dark times of Hetalia being my entire life (lol). However, I still love these characters and I want to finish this story, no matter how slowly. I've got a burst of motivation so lets see how long this lasts.
See you in the next chapter, eventually! Please let me know what you think, and if anyone out there still loves Hetalia anymore haha.
