Ben
Disclaimer; all characters and copyright belong to SM.
A/N-thank you for the kind reviews on this story! I think I'm finding this story so difficult because there are way too many vamps in it, sighs. I am just terrible at writing them. Anyway, here is the next chapter. I have to say it gave me a migraine….
Chapter Twenty-Three-Uneasiness
Alice sat in the front seat of her yellow Porsche, dominated by a profound sadness over Jasper's betrayal. It felt like every other emotion had been pushed from her being. All that was left was an aching hollowness. Her bottom lip quivered as she rested her hands on the steering wheel. In that moment of despair, she longed to cry, to feel the watery tears slip from under closed lids and dribble down her cheeks. But she was denied even that solace. She wondered when she had started to become separate from Jasper. It was hard to pinpoint the exact moment that their paths had begun to diverge and they started to drift apart.
Alice remembered when she foresaw Jasper finding her in a vision, before he came looking for her. They had met face-to-face in a diner located in Philadelphia, when Jasper was not a "vegetarian" vampire, where she told him that she had been waiting a long time for his arrival. A little bewildered but intrigued with her knowing him, Jasper "bowed his head like a good southern gentleman" and answered, "I'm sorry, ma'am." She offered him her hand, a non-verbal question of whether or not he would like to go with her. He did indeed take her hand, as the sight of it brought him hope "for the first time in almost a century". During their companionship and travels, Alice and Jasper fell in love. By 1950, they found Carlisle with assistance from her visions and had been part of his coven ever since.
Alice and Jasper had been together since the 1950s, but were not as flamboyant about their relationship as Rosalie and Emmett. Alice had always firmly believed they were soul mates. Jasper had always been very protective of her from the beginning. When they had found Carlisle and embarked on their new 'vegetarian' lifestyle, Jasper had struggled. He still did. He had never been able to let go of his thirst for human blood completely. Not like she had. When she had first been changed, she had developed a conscience on her own, which kept her from feeding on humans, though her success was sporadic. Already knowing that she and Jasper would join the Cullen clan in the future, she had started practising the 'vegetarian' lifestyle while waiting for Jasper to show up. As a result, her control was equal to Carlisle's.
As she sat reflecting on her past, Paul slipped into the passenger seat beside her. He glanced at her tense profile, sighing when her head bent and she pressed her forehead against the steering wheel.
"For what it's worth, I told Bella she was out of order." He hesitated before laying a gentle hand on the back of her head. "I know what its like when people judge you unfairly. You have nothing to feel guilty about."
"I know." Alice raised her head again and looked at him from under lowered lashes. "I don't know what to do." She whispered. "I don't know what to do about Jasper. I feel so betrayed."
"Have you called him?" Paul asked. He didn't know much about Alice's mate. Jasper was reserved and had acted nothing but professional when he was coaching them just before the newborn battle. He seemed like a seasoned fighter. Paul had been impressed with the way that Jasper had despatched the newborns. It was quick and he didn't let them suffer. But he had to admit he'd seen a wild gleam in Jasper's eyes during the battle, like he was taking pleasure in it.
"I know I have to." Alice closed her eyes as if she was in pain. "But I know once I do it really will be the end of us. And I'm scared." She opened her eyes again and gazed at Paul in despair. "I've been in denial for so long, Paul." She admitted with difficulty. "Jas has always had the least control over his thirst. He attacked Bella once. Did Jacob ever tell you that?"
"Fuck!" Paul swore in disbelief. "If Jake knew he would have killed him." He paused for a minute as the implications of what Alice had just said sank in. "If he was struggling so much, then why the hell was he around humans at all?" He glared at Alice in disgust and she recoiled from him.
"I always did my best to watch him." She cried. "He could contain it most of the time and stepped out when there was any hint that he might lose control. Carlisle trusted that Edward and I would always be able to foresee if Jas slipped up. He found it very irritating being watched all the time and he began to really resent it."
"He attacked Bella!" Paul snapped at her. He thumped his fist angrily on the dashboard. "There is no excuse, Pixie. Fuck!" He was so angry that he was forced to climb out of the car to get some air in a vain attempt to calm himself down.
Alice climbed out after him. "I loved him so much, Paul. I wanted this life so much. And I thought Jas wanted it, too. I think he did…in the beginning." Her voice cracked on the last word and she turned away from Paul so he couldn't see her face. "He tried so hard for my sake, but deep down I knew he was unhappy. By the time we moved here and Bella came into our lives, I knew something in him had changed. On the run up toward the newborn battle it was the happiest I had seen in him in such a long time. Jas has a very militaristic mindset. I kind of knew then that he was missing his old life when I saw how animated he was during the battle. I just didn't want to admit it to myself."
Paul let the cold air cool his fevered skin as he leaned against the Porsche and folded his arms defensively across his chest. He felt out of his comfort zone. His odd friendship with Alice had started off as all fun and games, and he had enjoyed her company. He had never been good at dealing with emotions. Hell, he struggled to keep a lid on his temper. He wasn't built for this type of thing. Alice should be confiding in another female-like Esme or Bella. He didn't know what to say or do to comfort her.
"I don't know what you want me to say." He admitted honestly.
Deflated, Alice finally turned around to face him. "You don't need to say anything. I didn't mean to dump this all on you." She said tiredly. "I just needed to vent. I'm sorry."
Paul shrugged. "I'm crap at this, Pixie. Ask anyone."
"Stop selling yourself short." Alice managed a watery smile. "You're better at this then you think. Being with you has taken my mind off all my problems with Jas. Thank you for being my friend, Paul Lahote."
Paul gazed at the short pixie-like girl-hence the nickname-she was thin in the extreme and incredibly tiny. He thought they must look ridiculous side by side, much like Bella and Jacob did, come to think of it. Her short spiky black hair was in disarray as she combed her fingers through it nervously. She stared up at him with large eyes full of sadness and it broke him.
"Dammit, Pixie." He grumbled as he pulled her into an affectionate hug. Alice sniffed as she rested her forehead against his chest. "I'm here for you, okay."
"Thank you." Alice's response was muffled. She let him comfort her for a minute before pulling back and letting out a resigned sigh. "I'm going to call Jas now." She continued bravely as she pulled out her cell phone. "Will you stay with me?"
"I haven't got anywhere else to be." He teased her in an attempt to lighten the atmosphere.
"Lucky me." Alice responded with a hint of a smile. "Here goes." She murmured as she pulled up Jasper's number and called him.
Jacob and Bella felt confident enough in Luka's recovery to leave him in Esme's tender loving care while they went back to her house to talk to Charlie and see Ben. Bella was missing her little brother like crazy. It had seemed like ages since she had last spent any quality time with him. She had been so caught up in the search for Luka. The plan was to spend some time with Ben until it was his bedtime, then after he was asleep, she would talk to Charlie and finally tell him about Luka.
"Isn't that Blondie's car?" Jacob asked when they passed a striking red Ferrari parked a few meters away from the Swan house.
Bella looked at Jacob, confused. "Esme said Rosalie was with Emmet."
Jacob frowned. He didn't like Rosalie-or Blondie as he called her. There was just something about her he didn't trust. Her openly antagonistic attitude toward the wolves as well as Bella rubbed him up the wrong way. When he learned that she had found out about Ben, it troubled him. He could sense that it made Bella uneasy, too.
"Why would she lie?" He asked Bella.
"I don't know." Bella mumbled.
Jacob parked the car behind Charlie's cruiser. As soon as he climbed out, he could smell Rosalie. "She's definitely inside the house."
"What's she up to?" Bella wondered as she fumbled in the pocket of her jacket for the door key.
As soon as they entered the house, they could hear laughter coming from the lounge. Jacob and Bella exchanged another uneasy glance. Bella took the lead as she walked into the front room. "I'm home." She called out.
"Hey, Bells! Hey, Jake!" Charlie greeted them animatedly.
"Hey, Dad." Bella responded faintly. "Hello, Rosalie. I wasn't expecting to see you here." She said coolly.
"It's nice to see you, Bella." Rosalie replied in a neutral tone.
Bella's sole focus was on her baby brother. He was sitting on Rosalie's lap. The cool blonde had her arms wrapped around him protectively. As soon as Ben saw Bella his eyes lit up and he wriggled away from Rosalie and ran to his sister. Bella immediately bent down and scooped him up into her arms. "I've missed you." She cooed, kissing his sweet head.
Ben tucked his head under her chin as his little arms wound around her neck. Bella cuddled him, kissing the top of his head again. She felt Jacob come up behind her and embrace them both protectively. Charlie watched their interactions in surprise, he also didn't fail to notice the hostile way they were looking at Rosalie.
"Rose popped by to see you." He said carefully. "She's been helping me entertain, Ben."
Bella's eyes widened at the familiar way her dad said 'Rose'- like she was some old family friend or something and was always in the habit of popping over. It was clear the ravishing blonde had launched a charm offensive on Charlie to make him act so completely at ease around her.
"Esme said you were with Emmet." Bella said challengingly.
"Emmet was busy." Rosalie wasn't flustered at all at being caught out in a lie. "So, I thought I would take the opportunity to come and see you. But unfortunately, you were out. Charlie kindly said I could stay and spend time with him and Ben in the meantime." She turned away from Bella and a dazzling smile lit up her face as she looked in Charlie's direction.
"And a great help she's been, too." Charlie responded with a smile of his own.
Bella was incensed, angered that Rosalie was clearly using her vampire charm to manipulate her father. She glanced behind her at Jacob. She could see he was clearly thinking the same. "Well thanks for stopping by, Rosalie." She said tartly. "But it's getting late. Perhaps we can catch up another time."
"Of course." Rosalie conceded.
Knowing Rosalie as she did, Bella was the only one who caught the hint of annoyance underlying her tone. Rosalie gave Charlie the benefit of another one of her warm smiles, before casting one final loving glance at Ben as she took her leave.
A/N-thanks for reading!
