Author's note
Dear reader,
A few words about the current worldwide coronavirus crisis. I cry when I read the news, people dying everywhere, the tiny virus is killing us and destroying everything we believed in. My deepest condolences for everyone who has lost their loved ones. And also for those who will lose them during these dark times.
I try to understand all this but I can't. This is not the world I was born into. It's not even the world I was living in a month ago! It's like being a character in a warped novel, but, then again, if someone would've written about this a year ago, no one would've believed the story.
I live in a remote corner of Finland and in my town, there are no infected people (yet). But the virus is creeping closer every day and the anticipation is beginning to wear everyone out. We are in lockdown and things are rather chaotic for me and my family. As I write this (3rd April 2020) the whole of Finland has been closed for 2 weeks and it's going to last at least 1,5 months. Who knows how long after that everything is in turmoil?
We can't take our kid to the daycare (well technically we could, because it's still open, but it's highly recommended to keep your children at home if possible). So, she's at home. We work from home. Due to the coronavirus situation, I have been given new kinds of tasks that require a lot of thinking. I have to improvise and make hard decisions in a few seconds. On each day, I begin working early in the morning, as soon as I wake up. Then we switch with my husband in the middle of the day so that he can begin his work. We are fortunate that we can choose our working hours, I'm well aware that's not possible for everyone. We possibly couldn't work at the same time, the other must be with our daughter or no one is going to get anything done. We both have demanding jobs and both are facing a whole new set of problems each day. We hate interruptions, and she's going to give them - she's six years old, for crying out loud!
But we consider ourselves privileged! We still have our jobs, we aren't sick, we still have each other.
This has been going on for 2 weeks now, and things are improving for me, as I get used to the situation. We get our work done, we get the housework done etc, but I can't settle down so I could concentrate on my writing right now. And THIS is hard. I need my writing to feel alive! (I finished this chapter almost three weeks ago. Then my beta-reader has been editing it. She sent it back to me over a week ago, but I haven't had the energy to publish it until now.) I have ideas for the next chapter and I have jotted them down to my notebook, but to actually write something new - I fear it's going to be a slow process.
First world problems, I know.
Right now, we have to be social distancing to prevent the virus from spreading, but we can always connect through kindness. It's not forbidden to say nice things. Please, leave a comment on my story. Your comment could be the one I need to keep going!
Love,
roihu678
The sun was about to rise. Two elves stood silently in the Market Place, fighting their impending fate. Sulrochil did not say she does not want to go. Legolas did not say he does not want her to go.
As the first sunrays reached Lake-town, a distant voice whispered, "Sulrochil, we need to go."
All that needed to be said had already been said. With the last caress of her love for him, Sulrochil walked away, feeling his gaze all over her. The shape of his palms lingered on her skin; the touch of his fingers was imprinted in her soul.
She did not need to see him to know his eyes were bright, even though his heart was full of sorrow. She held her posture steady.
They would not show outsiders what they felt.
Legolas watched Sulrochil walk away with Mithrandir. It did not take long before he could not see her anymore when the wizard and the tiny elf - the integral part of his well-being, his soulmate, his everything - turned around a corner. It took much longer when she was half a mile away, and he could no longer sense her location.
It was unclear when he stopped hearing her footsteps, because he heard them in his mind and not with his ears.
He still felt the touch of her soul, but he did not know how the feeling would change when she traveled further with every moment. For a moment, he was intrigued by the prospect of learning, but when the distance between them grew, he was convinced this was something he did not care to get to know. Inevitably though, it was something he would get to know soon. It was unavoidable, but this word did not belong to his language. Slowly, his fingers crept towards the small paper in his pocket, and he slid his thumb along her letter.
He would not read it until he absolutely could not bear not to.
King Thranduil watched his son, who was lost in his thoughts. "Are you ready, Legolas?"
"Ready for what?" Legolas turned to look at his father.
"Ready to do everything to ensure her safety."
Legolas turned his eyes slowly again to the horizon, feeling the first signs of his longing for her crush his heart. It would not be long until the yearning would grow beyond measure; his fortresses would be torn apart, his heart slaughtered. And then all the pain would double when Sulrochil would get close to Shadowland, needed to focus on her task - and all of her sufferings would be transferred to Legolas to bear. "Of course, I am ready."
"It will not be easy," Father said, hoping they had made the right decision.
"I would do anything for her."
"I know you would," Thranduil sighed. "I know."
Along the dark streets of Lake-town Sulrochil and Mithrandir walked in silence northward - towards Shadowland; towards the last remaining outpost of the orcs. The roads were empty, the first living beings they encountered only at the Eastern gate. The watchmen opened the gate curiously watching the odd pair leaving town at this hour. A pair of cat eyes were glistening from the shadows under the watchtower, looking at the wizard and elf keenly.
The first signs of yearning for Legolas began to pain Sulrochil's heart as she turned her back to him and got worse with each step. When she got out of the town, a dark zigzag of spruces on the horizon caught her eyes. The longing was already almost unbearably wheezing around her.
The swishes of her unhappiness entered the senses of the wizard who forced himself to block most of it out of his mind - no point letting her misery add to his foul mood. While he was listening to his own footsteps and sensing the inaudible steps of the elf, Mithrandir pondered how it had come to this. The elves! They dance around each other for years - for long uneventful years - and then fall in love in the worst possible moment, forcing him to do the most unimaginably cruel deed of separating them right after the bonding.
But it had to be done.
It had not been the intent of the wizard to send Sulrochil into Shadowland when he rode towards Mirkwood. No, before he had namely Pelingilon in mind. At least the King had had enough wit to send him there saving time now they know his hiding abilities were not enough. And the timing was crucial now when they needed to attack Shadowland as soon as possible before the evil forces managed to reinforce their orc army after the defeat in the Battle of Lake-town.
So, they needed to send this spectacular concentration of instability there. At every time the lady was unpredictable, but right now overly so. Usually, she would have no problems concentrating on her mission, but now, right after the bonding, her emotions were in turmoil. How can she ever manage the wickedness of the orcs for many days? Mithrandir did not know, but he had no choice but to try - and that was the reason why he was now walking the path with the lady. She had all the skills for this mission, if only she managed to stay calm enough.
One could only hope the King's scheme would be enough, and she would trust her ring to help in her mission.
And speak of the devil, what one should think about the King's privacy about many things when they had discussed all this last night?! Well, was he not always shrouded in secrecy?
Above all, Mithrandir blamed himself for not sensing the evil forces gathering in the north in time. How could his senses have been so disoriented?
On the other hand, sensing the evil forces in the north would have been useless, for he would not have gotten King Thranduil's army to attack them before all this. The betrothal of his son and the anticipation of sailing to the Undying Lands after the wedding had caused the King to allow his army to go to war now.
All this was circling in his mind - without the betrothal, Mithrandir would not have King Thranduil and his army with him, but now, after the betrothal, he had to force the newly betrothed into appalling separation.
Last night he also had heard about the unfortunate event of Legolas believing Sulrochil dead for a long-ish while. The elves!? Why do they have to get so profoundly affected and severely wounded on occasions like this? If they mourn, they mourn like a thousand volcanoes erupting at the same time. After all these millennia of observing the elves, their feelings were still quite incomprehensible for the wizard. Yet, he knew it was the flip side of their ability to love unconditionally. When the elves love, they love like… hmm… the wizard had no words for such nonsense.
"Now we have walked half a mile," Mithrandir said suddenly.
"Aye, you cannot sense our Wardens' Bond anymore," Sulrochil replied.
"Your Bond of Love is still clear."
"How do you cope with sensing several bonds at the same time? Is it not confusing?"
"You have the strangest questions," Mithrandir smiled.
"But it must feel odd?"
"I am used to it, so it is not odd at all. It is who I am. How would you answer if a man would ask you if hearing the bats and insects feels odd?"
"It is not odd at all."
"Exactly," Mithrandir said. "It is the same for me. Sometimes in elven cities, I need to shut off my mind from sensing all of them at the same time, but right now, I cannot sense any other bond than yours."
"How long do we need to walk until you stop sensing it?"
"We could walk to the end of the world, and I still would sense it if I am near you."
"But does it get weaker along the way?"
"Somewhat weaker, I guess. It is strong, much stronger than it should be now. During the past millennia, I have met many couples on their first day of betrothal. The bonds are always like wisps of hay swaying in the wind. I have never encountered a new bond like yours. There is something peculiar in it as if you had been together for thousands of years - not one day. But," the wizard lowered his voice to a whisper, "it is grief-stricken."
"Why is that?"
"You tell me."
"How would I know what could cause that kind of thing?" she asked.
"Go on, make a guess."
"Perhaps, it is because we have to be separated. Our souls have to clutch at each other's like it was our last day, and it very well could be. Legolas knows it. Of course, he knows! Even though he trusts my skills, he is always aware of the unexpectable."
"That was a good guess," Mithrandir said gently. "As good as mine, because I have no idea what could cause it. As I said, I have never sensed anything like this."
"What is your guess, then?" Sulrochil insisted.
"Last night, my friend Thranduil stormed into my room and informed me Legolas had believed you dead."
"What does that have to do with our bond?" Sulrochil said, turning her head abruptly so she could see the wizard.
"At that moment, Legolas met the endless loneliness, kissed the death and lived the whole eternity without you. His need to be sure you are alive could be the reason."
"I see," Sulrochil said, pondering what the wizard just told her.
Each step away from Legolas made Sulrochil yearn for him painfully more. An iron fist wrenched at her heart. Each step was worse than the one before, and she had to force herself to proceed.
All the while, the sun was rising higher in the sky. All its shine was being sucked from the elf's soul. Why were the days different? Yesterday they basked in the light; now her soul was turning into pitch-black coal. How could they survive what was to come?
A gale of unknown eddied in her soul - and the coal crumbled into dust, smothering her vision. At night the darkness would fall, and she would be alone with her thoughts. For the first time in her life, she was afraid of the night, and the threat was inside her mind.
Sulrochil tried to concentrate on listening to the voices of her surroundings, but it was a hopeless attempt. The longing she felt was almost unbearable; and for the first time in her life, she was unable to keep watch properly while she walked. Should there be enemies nearby, they could get close; still, she would not notice them. She tried to concentrate on the details of her plan, but everything only twirled inside her head. She tried to contemplate her love but found that it only made her feel worse when she remembered she would not see him for four days.
Mithrandir pondered whether he should or should not talk to Sulrochil. Either option could be harmful to her.
He decided to try. "There is one thing I do not know. Why did Legolas believe you were dead in the first place?"
"The King did not tell you that?"
"Of course not, it was not his story to tell. And you do not have to address him as the King when you are talking to me."
"I will address him as I wish," Sulrochil snapped, ignoring Mithrandir's amused smile. "The story is long and complicated. I do not wish to tell you about it now."
"We have time while we are walking."
"I thought you are here to ensure I do what I am supposed to do, and not forget myself dancing with the butterflies," she said, turning to pierce the wizard with her gaze.
"I think we should talk."
"I do not want to talk," she replied with a grim face and crossed her arms, turning away from the wizard.
"You do not have to say a word. I can do the talking."
"I see I have no choice," she sighed.
"You can choose, but you would always wonder what I would have said to you."
"You win, Mithrandir," she said, sounding a little amused.
"I knew I would. You are curious to hear my words," the wizard said, leaning on his staff more as they were walking uphill. "I have been trying to guess what could possibly have happened that would have made Legolas believe that kind of thing. He should not have believed anything like that easily."
"It was not his fault," Sulrochil said. "It was not an easy situation at all. You cannot blame him in the slightest. It began with a fiendish quarrel. I was not talking to Legolas for many days, but I do not want to talk about this."
"Well, was it when you two did not have any disagreements?"
"Aye, but this was something else, those were the most agonizingly unbearable days of our lives," Sulrochil began. Then she continued telling Mithrandir about the attack of the orcs and how she had floated down the river with her horse. In detail, she described how Legolas had believed her to be dead while she was gone, and how they found their love when she finally got back. "So, now you heard why he believed me to be dead. It was not his fault, but mine. Mine only, because the initial quarrel was also my fault. I severely misunderstood some things."
"I can guess the reason for your disagreement," Mithrandir said.
"Aye, you probably can. After all, you are the all-knowing wizard, always spying on us wherever we are," Sulrochil replied. "But the reason for our argument is not significant anymore. I have settled everything with Legolas, but this all brings only unpleasant memories. I hurt him so much during our fight, and now I feel the guilt again. He loves me so much that he would do anything for me. He loved me that much already then, and still, I hurt him so badly. Of course, we have also settled that, but this horrible misery of his absence makes every sad thing multiply.
"I knew I would miss him today, but I had no clue how hard this would be. I only wonder what it will be like tomorrow or the day after that. Or when I walk around the awful collection of sadness, unhappiness, and everything unpleasant you can imagine. I know you said I would not have to endure this agonizing longing for him during my mission - and I believe you - nevertheless, there will be a hollow inside me without him."
"You must concentrate only on happy memories when you are there. Do you have anything tangible with you that reminds you of Legolas?"
Sulrochil flashed a small smile, reaching for her ring from her hidden pocket and putting it on her finger.
"Now that ring is something I have not seen for a long, long time," Mithrandir smiled.
"Have you seen it before?"
"Naturally. I was there at the ceremony where the baby of King Thranduil and Queen Glaneth got his name. And the ring was brand new on the Queen's finger."
"As I said, you are always everywhere and know all," Sulrochil smiled, watching the ring shine in the sunlight. "Did you know Legolas has always carried this with him?
"No."
"How shameful of you!"
"Indeed."
"How was the ceremony?" Sulrochil asked, scanning the forest around them. The ring on her finger gleamed in the sunlight. A small flare of love emerged from her heart as she touched her ring with her thumb. Suddenly, she could see the forest better.
"It was like all royal ceremonies, pompous and boring," Mithrandir said. "Long speeches, lots of singing, the whole place was overflowing with green leaves. Every kind of tree, they were everywhere. And - for your ears only - only to make things more fun, I might have added to the multitude of the leaves with some floating aspen leaves. The Queen cried of happiness; all the ladies cooed over the child who only slept through it all."
"So there is finally proof that he has been sleeping at least sometimes," Sulrochil said fondly.
"Elven children sleep as much as any children."
"How would I know?" Sulrochil leaned her head to her hands on the verge of crying. "I have never even seen an elven baby."
"Sulrochil, please forgive me. I should not have said any of this."
"This is the curse of the last generation of elves," she snapped and turned to look at the wizard with irritation until she turned her head and inhaled deeply. "I must not wallow on this now. Usually, I am almost fine with the fact we can never have children. Well, I have to admit I am worse than almost fine."
"I can sense you are much worse than almost fine," Mithrandir said.
"Aye," Sulrochil's quiet voice was full of agony.
"You have indeed learnt something," he replied, still sensing the raging storm inside the elf's mind.
"I have not and never will learn to cope with childlessness," she grimaced.
"I meant you have learnt to keep your feelings under control. Your fury did not boil over."
"But," Sulrochil said, slowly lifting one eyebrow, "you are an outsider."
"When has that stopped you getting angry at people?"
"I have been instructed to control my emotions amongst outsiders."
"How are you able to do it this easily?"
"Thranduil has not asked much from me. I have not gotten many orders," she said and tilted her head to the right. "Actually, this is the only one: grow a mask for the public eye. Well, this is not the only one, but the most important. Although I have a feeling there might be situations when obeying this shall prove to be much harder... Nevertheless, if I understand anything about my position now, I must learn not to explode at anyone except them."
"Them? Poor Thranduil."
"He might have gotten an earful too."
"No doubt. How did he take it?"
"It is hard to tell, as he is so hard to read. If I had to guess, I would say he enjoyed it."
"You might not be too wrong about that," Mithrandir said with mirth, "but are you better now?"
"At least I am not crying after hearing the word 'baby'," Sulrochil replied and pondered for a few moments. "Or actually it is not that word which causes my agony. I like babies; they have done nothing wrong. I like children; they are refreshing and keep the world in their little fingers. My pain is caused by the impossibility of never being able to feel motherly love towards a child."
"The world is full of orphans after all these wars."
"How could elves ever raise a mortal child properly?"
"From their parents children need most of all love. Anything else can be taught by anybody."
Sulrochil's eyes got wider as she turned her gaze up to the pair of the wizard's twinkling eyes, and unconsciously the thumb of the elf brushed her ring to feel it's solidness.
"I might need to think about that," she said after a while, "but as I said, today every unhappy thought forms a whirlwind of despair in me. Every step further from him makes me feel every rock, every grain of sand between our paths. Every hill between us pushes me more into desolation. Please, tell me something good."
"There is one memory which I could share with you," Mithrandir said. "It involves a young elven boy with silvery hair always flowing after him because the boy was running all the time and never stood still. I cannot remember how old Legolas was then, but a small child, nevertheless. I was walking towards the royal building under a low bridge when I suddenly felt a bucketful of cold water falling on my head. I saw nothing, but of course I knew who had poured the water on me.
"I went into the castle, and I was talking to the guard in the hall when I heard a bright voice shouting, 'Mithrandir, how nice to have you here with us again.' And when he came closer and noticed I was not wet, the expression on his face was priceless."
"I guess that was the last time he tried to make fun at your expense," she smiled. "I remember you from my childhood as strict and stern; always quickly striding past the lesser children. When I talked to you for the first time, I was surprised that you were nothing like that."
"I must appear quite severe because I have no time to chat with everyone."
"And now I am taking your precious time."
"You are not taking my time; I am giving it to you."
"I understand, you must make sure I will perform my task perfectly."
"It is not that. I know you will perform it without any flaw no matter what I do or say, but I know a certain elf would shoot an arrow through my head if he found out that I have been keeping you in misery here."
"He would not shoot, only glare at you menacingly while pointing the arrow at your head."
"Did he mention he shot at me once?"
"Aye, in the Fangorn Forest, except that he did not aim at you, but Saruman."
"He believed it was him, but it was me standing there in the line of fire."
"In his heart, the arrow was aimed at Saruman. Therefore, it could not have hit you."
"Your reasoning is curious."
"That is what I hear all the time."
For a while, they walked in silence. "Mithrandir," Sulrochil finally smiled. "How do you do this?"
"Do what?"
"You said you would do all the talking, but you got me blabbing almost all my secrets."
"I did not do anything. You wanted to talk."
"Perhaps you are right, and there is one thing I need to ask you. Why did you pull that trick on us back there in Lake-town?"
"So, you figured it out."
"We figured it out the moment we got out of the meeting."
"And you did not come back to berate me?"
"Legolas did not want to use our limited time for that."
"And you were happy with his choice?"
"You played on his feelings, so it was his choice. I feel what he feels, and I am beginning to see the benefits of not losing my temper. But you did not answer my question. Why did you do what you did?"
"Is it not obvious? I sensed your new bond, and I knew he would be protective. He is protective in his nature, but in that state overly so. I had to exaggerate my request, so you both, but especially Legolas, could create your plan. This way, you both got the feeling of being in control of what happens to you."
"How can we be in control of what happens to us, when we have no say over what happens in the world right now? We have no say in whether there is war or peace."
"As you walk here you are right now saying you want peace."
"Aye, we want peace, but right now we are again at war."
"You cannot control anyone else but yourself. The only thing you can change is how you take the situation, how you feel about it, and if you are willing to accept the present situation."
"You are cryptic, Mithrandir." Sulrochil pulled her ring off her finger and touched her lips with it.
The ring was a beacon for her. All the light from last night glimmered on its surface, showing her the right way. It was not the path of her feet, but of her heart. If she followed its guidance, she would always reach her destination.
"May I see your ring?" Mithrandir said when she began to tuck it back into its pocket. Thranduil had been right. She already believed in her ring. A little enhancement of that trust would be all she needed.
Sulrochil was surprised by his request but handed the ring to the wizard. He watched it intensely, especially inside. He also gazed at Sulrochil through it.
"This ring is powerful," Mithrandir said. "I should have guessed this."
"Guessed what?"
"That the Elvenking would not give his wife any cheap trinket! This has been forged by… No, it is not my place to tell you the story. You yourself must ask when you meet him again, but this ring has the power to overcome evil forces."
"It did not save Glaneth."
"A ring cannot save anyone if a sword slashes."
"A sword? If you know more about the death of Glaneth, you should tell Legolas."
"No. He should ask his father if he wants to know. I mean that no ring can save anyone from tangible objects, but this ring has great power to save its true owner from falling under the pressure of evil."
"What do you mean?"
"What do you feel right now?"
"My limbs are being torn apart by the horrendous longing. And it makes me annoyed!"
"I mean," Mithrandir continued, "how much do you feel the evilness of the orcs?"
"Not much," she replied. "Nowhere near as much, I should feel it now, as I already hear them in the distance. I believe it is crushed under all the pain."
"That is not the case," he replied, not looking at the elf. "Your ring is doing it. Because of your ring, you are not feeling as much turmoil as you should when you are now close to a huge orc base."
"Legolas has owned it for almost three millennia. He has carried it all the time with him without any help. He has always felt the evilness of the orcs like all elves."
"Legolas was not the true owner of the ring," Mithrandir said.
"I do not understand."
"The true owner is the third owner of the ring, but it must be given to someone you love. Let me explain. When Thranduil gave this ring to his wife, that was the first love. The second is the love of Glaneth for her son, and when you got the ring from Legolas, his love for you was the third and the power of the ring activated. It has not helped anyone before you. You are the true owner of this ring. The Ring of the Third."
"Does it have a name?"
"Aye. I had heard about the ring, but I did not know who owned it until now."
"Why would Thranduil give it to his wife, if it did not help her in any way? Why would anyone even create a ring like this?"
"Sulrochil, in a way it helped her immensely. Glaneth loved Legolas more than anything. She knew she would give the ring to him someday, and Glaneth knew Legolas would give it to someone he loved. I guess that she wanted to have that ring so Legolas could use it to protect the person he loved. You.
"And that is the reason why this ring exists, to give a gift of ultimate love for your child, to give your child a gift with which he can protect his loved one. Glaneth must have hoped that Legolas would grow like his father and want to protect his loved one above anything else. By giving this ring to you, you are shielded."
"You seem to be certain it has been Glaneth who wanted this ring in the first place," Sulrochil said. "Unfortunately, I have not had a chance to meet her yet, but I have met Thranduil. From what I know, this ring sounds just like what he would have wanted to give to Legolas."
"You must ask about that when you meet Thranduil again, although I am not quite sure if you will get an honest answer."
"Oh, he will answer me honestly."
"You seem to be sure about that."
"He would not dare to lie to me."
"Of course not," Mithrandir smiled. "Sulrochil, you must remember your ring represents love when you are there watching the miserable concentration of evil. This ring will be a counterforce for you against that darkness.
"When I asked if you have any items reminding you about Legolas, I did not expect anything with this kind of importance. Perhaps it is wrong to say this ring represents love; I should say it is love. This ring will help you endure your wicked task."
Mithrandir began to give the ring back to Sulrochil, but suddenly halted, "This ring is even more powerful than I ever expected!" Swiftly, he tucked it into her palm, as if it was on fire. "I cannot hold it anymore! Never again give it to anyone! Now I see the reason why your bond is so strong! The ring has tied your souls with eternal ropes, and not only you two but all four of you. Thranduil's and Glaneth's love strengthen you. It is their love that shields you, and this is the reason why this ring has been created!"
Sulrochil held the ring between her thumb and forefinger and tried to see what Mithrandir had seen. "Perhaps you are right, and the ring helps me, but I cannot think of it now. My head is muddled as I yearn for Legolas so much that it is horrendously painful. I am being smashed to pieces, and it is getting worse by the moment. I cannot understand how this can be erased."
"I do not dare to walk any closer, or they might notice me," the wizard said, pointing to a hill in the distance. "Please, run to that hill to see the outskirts of Shadowland. Then come back to me, because I need to know your agony is gone when you see them on that hill."
That was a lie, the wizard knew for sure that would happen, but he knew she would demand a reason for it. He should provide her with the answers. He had two options. Either he could claim the misery was gone because of his magic, or use the other explanation up his sleeve. Perhaps, in her topsy-turvy condition, she would appreciate the latter more, but that was a matter of which he would not say a thing for her.
Sulrochil ran towards the hill, trying to cope with the gnawing pain. An image of Legolas flashed in her mind when she ran past a tall linden tree making her yearn for his presence. How could this all-consuming torment ever go away? Climbing uphill, she slowed her speed to a slow walk and went between trees to hide better.
Through the foliage, she saw a field and behind it a huge orc base. Shadowland. Her destination. Loyalty, obligation and duty were familiar to her, and that wicked base of orcs beside an enormous mountain was now her duty.
What Mithrandir needed, King Thranduil needed, they all needed, depended on her. No one else could do what she could do. It could not be done halfheartedly. If she wanted to get this thing done, she needed to concentrate wholly on her mission. To be able to do that, all her agony suddenly went away. Just like that.
She stood on the hill, watching the view and listing all the details of her plan. Sheer determination surged through her veins.
Close to the top of Lonely Mountain, eagles were circling and making a nest. Down on the ground, vast armies of orcs were marching and learning how to kill. A resolute elf stood on the hill trying to adjust her eyes to perceive the ugliness of the orcs. All her pain was gone, leaving only a strong sense of purpose.
Confronting the wizard would now be in order, and she dashed back to him.
Mithrandir smiled when he saw the change in Sulrochil. Her eyes shone with pure willpower.
"As long as I have known you, you never failed in your assignments. I began to get a little worried, but now I see there is no need to worry anymore."
"You are right. At the moment I saw my destination clearly on the hill, I began feeling right. I am determined to do what is expected of me. I will go there, and I will come back with what we need. But I do not understand why everything changed when I saw Shadowland? Where did the longing go? What did you do?"
Mithrandir leaned on his staff, carefully watching the tiny elf in front of him. She was gazing back at him, tilting her head to the left. The wizard saw her questioning look and wondered if it made any difference whether she tilted her head left or right. Nevertheless - now would be the time to test his true abilities.
"I did not do anything. You did it yourself. Your love for Legolas is great; you want to live and get back to him. You are trained in these kinds of assignments. You know if anyone has to go so close to an orc base as you will soon, she should be wholly engaged in her mission. This mission cannot be done carelessly and without full concentration. I have been watching you for a couple of hours now and seen your struggle. You have not been aware of it; your mind has done it. Your bond is fresh, and naturally, it is not fulfilled. Your need to fulfill it is stronger than your agony, and you have turned it to your advantage. Your pain had to yield to a greater force. That is why all your sufferings are now part of your determination."
That was, of course, most blatant nonsense, but he could not pronounce the truth which was that all her agony was moved to Legolas to bear. He only hoped she would be so concentrated on her mission so she would not remember the fact about the bond she had learnt in school. In dire circumstances, all feelings could move to one, so the other could manage what is asked of them.
The fact she had never wished for love meant that she never really had tried to imagine what love would be like. If she had been considering the possibility of love and trying to picture it during the long centuries alone, she would now know that all their combined pain was with Legolas right now. But she had never even thought about it, and now she was only floating in the sky of love, and not wholly aware of every little detail about how the bond functioned.
"I believe I understand what you said. My worst fear has been how I could manage my mission if my concentration faltered," Sulrochil said, turning to look in the direction of Shadowland again. She was trained; she was prepared; she was ready. "I shall not falter. I will do what is expected of me."
"You are the key, Sulrochil," Mithrandir said.
"I may be the key," she said, "but where is the lock?"
The wizard whispered and put his palm on her shoulder, "You are the lock, as well."
Author's note: The next chapter will be about Legolas and Thranduil. For some time I feared I couldn't write anything at all anymore, but lately, they have begun talking in my head again. So, there's a glimmer of hope. I really hope they'll come truly alive again and surprise me with their discussions like they have been doing during the past chapters. Wish me luck! Please, leave a comment.
