Chapter 29
His stomach dropped and he felt his world crumbling around him. He felt like the air had been pulled out of his body and his heart started to beat rapidly as adrenalin pulsed through him. He could hear cackling inside of his head, it was deafening and at the same time, the only thing he could focus on. His mind felt like it was being flushed down the drain, beaten to a pulp and then thrown back together. This was information he couldn't process, if it was true then everything was about to change.
"Are you sure?" Jonathon asked.
"Yes."
"Well… what do we do?"
"I don't know," Harleen answered. "I just… don't know. I guess I've got to go to my doctor and arrange blood tests and scans to confirm."
Jonathon looked at the floor and had to take a couple of breaths to centre himself before he did anything else. This wasn't something they'd discussed. Ever. He knew they weren't the best with contraception, but he knew she was on the pill and was completely reliable for taking them. It just wasn't something they had spoken about. He didn't know how he felt, he was certain she didn't know either. He reached out and touched his fingers to her cheek, she leaned into his hand and he immediately stepped closer and hugged her as tightly as he dared.
"We've gotta have one of those grown up conversations, don't we, Jay?" Harleen asked quietly, her Brooklyn accent was heavy as her anxiety took away her ability to conceal her native inflection.
"We do, princess, we do." Jonathon sighed. "You go park yourself on the couch and I'll make us something to drink." He kissed her hair but didn't let go of her immediately, he wanted her to know that he was there and not angry, just a bit confused with all the different reactions in his head. His last confrontation with pregnancy had been a lie and a broken marriage, it wasn't that he didn't believe Harleen but he didn't know how to react this time.
He loved her dearly, she was the most important thing in his life. But a baby? Could he really be a father? Was he able to adapt his possessiveness over her to include their child? Did she even want it? What would they do if they both agreed that they weren't going to keep it? How would they handle Arkham? All of these questions were swirling around him as he made quickly poured her a cold glass of pink lemonade and he got himself a bottle of Budweiser. He knew it was early, but it might just help him keep his thoughts on point. This was the biggest step of their lives and he had to be there for her. It was her body that would be changed forever regardless of what happened.
"One lemonade for the lady." Jonathon chuckled and sat beside her. She grasped the glass tightly and sipped it quickly. The slight tang helped bring her thoughts together and she kissed him quickly. He rested his forehead against hers and they just took a moment before she sat cross legged on the couch to face him.
"This isn't quite what I thought we'd be dealing with today." Harleen sighed. "I'm sorry Jay… I have been taking my pill and-"
"It takes two to make a baby, Harl, I'm as much a part of this and as such, I will support any decisions you make."
"First thing we've got to decide is… do we want to keep it?" Harleen said quietly. This was a difficult subject and she wouldn't make a decision without him. She had never wanted kids, let alone a child before she was thirty, but now it was really happening and it was happening with the man she adored.
"Does a baby fit in with our lives?" Jonathon asked. She should've been ready to hear his typical and to the point question, but it unnerved her and she felt a little cross for making it sound like a minor inconvenience.
"The people we work with aren't exactly normal patients or criminals." Jonathon continued in a hushed voice. "They are violent, they have Mob connections and some of them would probably try and hurt you in horrendous ways, Harl. What one earth would happen with Zsasz or Waylon? What if Pamela escaped and took you with her? What on earth would that do to you or our baby?"
"Pammy wouldn't purposefully-"
"I know she wouldn't, but we do know she cannot control the toxins in her skin." Jonathon told her. "I would never be able to live with myself if anything happened to you or the baby, especially because of Arkham." He finally met her eye again and hoped she understood. He couldn't put them in any further danger and he knew she wouldn't back down from work easily. But he had to try and protect her and the baby if he could.
"Does that mean you want it?" Harleen questioned.
"I don't… I don't want to not have this." Jonathon answered. "It's just… a lot for me to think about. Do you want it? This is your body, Harl', I won't force you either way."
"It's not something I ever thought about." Harleen replied. "I didn't want to be my mother and decided babies and motherhood weren't going to be a thing in my life… but I'm pregnant now. It's actually happening and it's happening with you and that means… so much more."
He was relieved that she wasn't saying 'no', but she wasn't saying a clear 'yes' either. He wouldn't ever force her to do anything, for his own benefit he wanted an answer. He stroked her hair behind her ear and cupped her cheek gently. He gave a small smile and kissed her quickly. He knew this was hard for her and he expected nothing, he just wanted her to know he was there whatever she decided.
"You promise you'll be with me through this?" Harleen asked him. She was tense and serious, yet she looked so wide-eyed and desperately young. She needed him to be so many things he knew he wasn't, but he would try his hardest.
"Of course, princess." Jonathon answered. She leaned into him and he kissed her again. He wrapped his arms around her and she looped her arms around his neck. She felt her heart starting to slow down and her nausea started to ease. She was still terrified but she felt better for knowing that he would support her through this.
"We're… we're having a baby?" Harleen mumbled against his mouth.
"We're having a baby." He chuckled and pressed her into another kiss. She hummed happily and let herself fall into their embrace, she took a lot of reassurance from this and she didn't want it to ever stop. She felt one of his hands move down her body and come to rest low on her abdomen, she wasn't sure how she felt about it but wouldn't stop him.
"I love you, Harley, thank you." He whispered. She put her hand over his and let out a long slow breath. "I'm going to be a dad."
"I'm gonna be a mom." Harley whispered. She didn't know whether that felt like a good thing to say or not. It was still so new and didn't feel real at all. "Let's wait to tell people. I'm early days and if anything happens, I couldn't bare telling everyone."
"Of course, princess." Jonathon nodded. "Our little treasure can be our little secret for now. I'll do everything to protect you both, I promise, Harley, nothing is going to go wrong. I won't let it happen."
"There is one thing I need to ask a favour of." Harleen said calmly. "You won't like it but… I need to speak to Pammy. I'm the only family she has and this would… this would make her so happy."
Jonathon wanted to say no immediately and had to stop himself. Poison Ivy was no longer the woman that cared for Harley. She was a dangerous villain who had murdered many people with her plants. He knew that Ivy was still keen on Harley, but he doubted Ivy would be able to control her pheromones and toxins around her and the baby.
"I'll talk to Sharpe. I won't mention the baby but… I can't risk losing you." Jonathon replied quietly. "I will do what I can, but please don't just… don't just go and do it without me."
"Thank you." Harleen grinned. She kissed him again and they lost themselves in the moment a little. She ended up underneath him with her legs around his hips, his hands tangled in her hair and he didn't leave her for a second. Her heart was racing and she felt herself reacting to his proximity as always. She was glad that they hadn't changed their raw base need for each other and as one of his hands found her waist, she moaned lightly.
Afterwards they gasped and panted in each other's arms and kept pressed together on the sofa. Harleen felt safe and secure, Jonathon felt reassured and happy. He had one of his hands over her abdomen where her bump would still form and her hand was slightly above his, their hands protecting their child.
