A/N: Chapter 27 already? enjoy...
~I'm not like them
But I can pretend
The sun is gone
But I have a light
The day is done
But I'm having fun
I think I'm dumb
Or maybe just happy~
~Nirvana~
Bruce was laughing on the inside. The charges his lawyer said they were accusing him of were a joke. They wouldn't be able to get any of them to hold up once they knew Lyra's secret. He sat in the room as his lawyer looked over everything and the room seemed deathly silent. Finally she leaned back from the table. The papers in front of her, and looked at him.
"Bruce, I need to ask, is any of this true?"
He scoffed, "It's not what you think." He rubbed his eyes, the lack of sleep from the night before getting to him now. "I was rescuing the girl from a madman."
"Bruce, what are you talking about?"
"The girl, Lyra, she is married to the Joker. He has forced her to stay with him through fear and brainwashing."
"That still would not legally give you the right to grab her. If it was true, you should have gone to the police. Besides, we all saw the Joker last year announce his wife, and she was helping him poison those people. She didn't look afraid."
"No this is personal, The Joker has gone too far and I have to stop him."
She shook her head, "Listen to me, you are in big trouble here. I will share with the police that you believe she is the Joker's wife but that doesn't save you from the consequences from this mess."
"Thank you." He put his hands on his face, "We have to save her."
He was aware of the fact that his lawyer hated him. The look on her face was hard. He looked away. It would all be worth it, if he saved her and that baby.
Joker called Red, eager to get everything going.
"Boss?"
"Checking in, do you know what you are doing?"
"I have the papers Cliff gave me. That's it."
"Good, you, my good man, are temporarily a man named Jack Napier."
"What kind of name is Jack Napier?" Red asked.
Joker ignored the question. "You are married to a woman named Lyra."
"Who is Lyra?"
"My wife." Joker said through gritted teeth. "You need to stop interrupting me with the questions. You can ask all you want, after."
The silence on the other end was telling. "I need you to play happy hubby. It should only be for a few days, a week at most. The police will probably stop by to chat. You were the only one I trust, that had a fairly clean background."
"Okay."
"She can catch you up completely, but the gist of it is, Bruce Wayne had her. She escaped and filed charges. You will be her husband, who as fate would have it, looks nothing like me."
"I'm a decoy?"
"You got it." He paused. "I need you to pick her up today 2:00pm from Gotham General, room 523. Take her back to my apartment and relax until I tell you different."
"Got it."
"Red?" he paused. "You touch her any more than necessary and I will skin you alive."
"Understood."
Joker ended the call and smiled.
Peach was all packed and waiting for her ride to show. She had argued with the doctor on call and the nurses, but had signed the discharge papers "against medical advice". The AMA paper and the discharge instructions were tucked into her bag. She had her baby in the car seat.
It was 1:58, if she knew Red, he would be here any second. It was no surprise that he walked through the door at 2 o'clock exactly. If Peach would have thought about it, she would have taken a picture of his face when he saw her holding the carseat.
"That." He pointed, "Is a baby."
She smiled. "Well until this shit blows over, it's our baby. You ready?" she watched as his face paled.
"Let's go." He turned and opened the door.
They stepped out into the hallway and met the nurse. She explained that with every patient leaving the hospital, they had to wheel them out to their cars. Peach rolled her eyes and sat in the chair. She realized that it wasn't that bad of an idea. She did feel achy, the pain meds were starting to wear off.
Red carried the bags and she held the car seat in her lap. They rode the elevator down to the garage level and the nurse wheeled her to her car. She wasn't sure why Red had her car, but she would ask later.
They loaded the car and Red didn't comment when she had insisted on sitting in the back with her baby. She was thankful Red was careful as he drove. They arrived at the apartment safe. Peach had an uneasy feeling when she started to open the door. The hate of Bruce cleared the unease and she got out, starting to get her baby out of the car seat.
They rode up to the apartment, Peach had her baby tucked into her left side, her gun held steady in her right hand. She let out a sigh of relief when the doors opened to the familiar place. Peach sat down on the couch, tucking the gun back into her bag. She watched Red bring in the bags and move them to the other side of the room. She watched everything, she would not be caught unaware again.
Red came over and sat on the far end of the couch.
"You ready for this?" she asked him.
"Ready as I will ever be,"
"Don't worry, husband, this will all be over soon."
Peach leaned back and closed her eyes for a minute. She really was happy to be back here, but it wasn't the same without her husband. Her real husband. She just wanted to go home, with Joker, and maybe get sleep. She hated not being able to sleep, but the baby needed her.
Her phone rang, startling her back to reality. She looked at the screen, not recognizing the number.
"Hello?"
"Mrs. Napier?"
"Speaking."
"This is detective Cortez, we came by the hospital to ask a few follow up questions and they said you insisted on being discharged early. Is everything okay?"
"Yes, I just wanted to go home, my husband picked me up."
"Could we stop by and ask you and your husband a few questions?"
"Yes, you know the address, the elevator code is *0801. It will bring you to our floor."
"We will see you in 15 minutes."
She hung up the phone. Red had been watching her, she smiled at him. The baby had started to fuss. She looked at her watch, almost 2 hours on the dot. She lifted her shirt and started to feed her daughter.
"Police will be here in a few minutes. They want to talk to us."
He nodded. "Boss told me what to say."
She laughed, "Of course he did."
It barely took the detectives 10 minutes to show. The elevator doors opened and in walked the same men she had spoken to at the hospital. She knew this was all a part of her husband's big plan. She moved the baby to the other breast and put a light blanket over her for the men's comfort.
"Mrs. Napier, please don't get up. We just have a few questions to ask you and your husband."
"Come in and have a seat."
"Is your husband here?" he asked looking around.
"Yes, he is just in his office." She turned her body slightly. "Jack, the detectives are here." She called to the small hallway.
She noticed the way the men had tensed, ready for whoever came around that wall. Peach knew that this meant Bruce had tattled. She held back the hate she felt, now was not the time to indulge. She looked down, her daughter had fallen asleep and was no longer eating. She freed herself and covered up. Moving the baby to her shoulder to burp her.
"Coming." She heard Red call down the hallway.
She turned back to the detectives. "Would either of you like something to drink?"
"Oh no thank you."
Red moved into the living room and moved next to her, setting on the couch. She could see the men visibly relax. The man sitting next to her was obviously not the Joker.
"What can we do for you officer?" Red asked.
"First we wanted to let you know we picked up Bruce Wayne. He is in an interrogation room as we speak."
Peach smiled.
"While he doesn't outright deny the charges, he tells a different story. He claims he rescued you from the Joker."
While she made sure to look confused, inside she was as happy as could be.
"Detective, I assure you, Bruce ran into me several months ago, literally, knocked me down. He bought me a replacement coffee. We chatted while they made it and then I left. I hadn't seen him again until the morning of my last doctor appointment." She took a deep breath. "He recognized me and was shocked that he lived upstairs from me. I left, had a lunch with my husband then came back. He grabbed me here in the garage. I was alone." Peach was sure to make a show of crying.
Red put his arm around her shoulder. She leaned into him and dried her tears.
"You know, now that you mentioned it, I vaguely remember him mentioning the Joker to me." She put her hand on her head like she was trying to remember. "Before he drugged me the second time, its all very fuzzy." She said.
"We have to ask, do you know the Joker? Personally?"
"No, we, of course, have heard of him like the rest of the city." Red told them.
Peach let out a sniffle, "I've never met him, I tried to tell Bruce he had the wrong person."
The detective nodded, making notes on the pad of paper he had with him. "Mr. Napier, why didn't you file a missing person's report for your wife?"
"I was out of town, we had lunch, and then I had to leave, for work." He sighed. "I got her call from the hospital, and rushed back home."
"I think that will be all, congrats on the beautiful baby." Cortez said. The two men stood to leave.
"Did you find the place he had me?" Peach asked.
"Not yet, he has barely spoken and that was filtered through his high priced lawyer." The second detective said. Peach couldn't remember his name only that it had made her giggle.
Cortez spoke again, "Do you remember any other details?"
She shook her head no, then looked up at them. "When I escaped, I took his car, I was scared to say before because I guess I had technically stolen it." She tried to look worried. "It had a GPS in it, I had to use it to find my way to the hospital."
The man looked excited. "Where is it now?"
"I parked it near the hospital, in an empty lot. I think for a computer store."
"We will check that out. "
Cortez's phone rang, "Excuse me a second."
Peach watched him talking on the phone, his face going rather pale. He ended the call and turned back to them.
"Can we turn on the television?" he asked.
Red grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. Peach had to hold back a smile. Her husband was on live television, warning the city to be on the lookout for his next grand idea. The live feed cut and the news was reporting on it while replaying the footage in a small box on the corner of the screen.
Red muted the TV and looked back at the detectives.
"Well, we have to get back." Cortez said. They piled into the elevator and Peach watched the doors slide closed.
Peach was exhausted. She just wanted to go home. Her phone chimed, she looked at it.
~meet you at the house~
She couldn't help but smile. She tucked her phone away in her bag and wrapped the baby up getting ready for the ride to her house. She couldn't wait to see her husband.
