A/N: Hey all, if you're still reading this thanks for hanging in there. Sorry this took so long. This chapter has got some angst and fluff and smut, you know all the good stuff. I figured you deserved it after waiting so long. Enjoy.
The final piece of the puzzle was Tony.
Once he was on board a plan and team were quickly assembled.
A spaceship arrived first, carrying an alien cyborg woman with blue and purple skin and a cold demeanor named Nebula, who was accompanied by a talking raccoon named Rocket. I managed to keep my shock at bay when Steve introduced me to them, both of them unimpressed by my presence and having zero time for 'chit chat' which Rocket had no problem telling me.
Steve and Tony later explained just who Nebula and Rocket were, members of the Guardians of the Galaxy, a mixed group of aliens and humans, and raccoons apparently, that...guarded the galaxy. Rocket had fought with Steve and Thor in Wakanda when Thanos first attacked, and Nebula had fought alongside Tony when he'd been lost in space, a story that I hadn't heard before that day. Steve and Tony both brushed over it rather quickly, despite the questions I had, acting as though it were no big deal.
I decided quickly that I wouldn't ask anymore questions and I would just go with the flow.
Rhodey arrived shortly after that in his War Machine suit with a smile. I had met Rhodey two times before when he'd come to visit Tony, but he didn't stay long whenever he did. I knew that he was a part of the Avengers and had been doing humanitarian work and missions while keeping in regular contact with Natasha.
Bruce and Rocket took the spaceship to get Thor, who was living in a town of his own creation called New Asgard, somewhere near Norway. They returned with a Thor that I didn't quite recognize. His hair was long once more, touching his shoulders, and his beard was long and touching his chest. He was the same tall and broad man that I'd remembered him to be give or take a few pounds. Though the dark circles around his eyes were new. He was dressed in multiple layers, looked as if he was in need of a bath, and shortly after he spoke I realized he was intoxicated. Still he seemed rather upbeat and grinned widely when he saw me, though I was surprised he remembered me.
"Ah Tony's assistant! Good to see you! Are you still in relations with the Captain?" He halted in his approach into the building and looked warily at the others around us, who was oblivious to his arrival. "Oh my apologies, that was meant to be a secret was it not?"
"It's no longer a secret Mr. Odinson," I assured with a smirk. "Steve and I are married and our relationship is known by all."
Thor looked shocked. "Marriage? Well this is news to me! Congratulations!"
He clapped Steve on the back so hard that his body was jerked forward and Steve had to catch himself on his feet.
"Thank you, Thor," Steve gritted out as he righted himself. "It's good to see you."
"And I, you, Captain," Thor nodded. "I think we're long overdue for this."
I could sense something in his tone, something that made me think Thor wasn't happy it had taken so long. I remembered when I'd seen him last and the fight that had ensued amongst the remaining Avengers. I imagined Thor hadn't been happy with Steve and Tony's decision to put a halt to the time machine.
"Well at least we're here now," I chimed in with a nervous laugh, hoping to relieve some tension.
"Indeed," Thor nodded in agreement.
Hawkeye, or as his close friends called him, Clint, was the last to arrive. I'd only seen photographs of him, and heard Natasha casually mention him in passing with a watery glint in her eye. She'd been the one to go retrieve him and there was a light in her eyes once she returned.
We'd convened in the hangar, standing in a circle and waiting to hear just what exactly Tony had planned. There was no one we trusted to care for our twins so we'd brought them with us, Steve held Emma in his arms and Evan stood at my feet, holding onto my leg.
"I don't want to get a plan going until we get the gateway built and that'll take us a few days. I've already gotten a head start but with the help of those with experience, we should have it done in a few days. If you don't know what you're doing you can help by staying out of the way. I'm also designing suits for time traveling so all your organs and such stay inside of their meat bags, I'll need your measurements," Tony paused to look at all of us and then continued. "I'd like to get started on that ASAP so Andy, you're running point on the engineering. You got any questions you ask her. I'll be in the lab."
My face fell when Tony pointed to me and all other eyes followed.
"I'm helping?" I stuttered.
"Yes, you do have a fancy degree in mechanical engineering do you not?"
I nodded slowly.
"And you can read a blueprint, correct?"
"Well yes, but-."
"Then let's dust that fancy degree off and put it to use," Tony smirked clapping his hands. "I got faith in you, Kid."
My heart warmed at those words and I managed to hold back the wide grin that wanted to overtake my face. I'd only come to be moral support for Steve and the errand girl if needed. I'd thought my help would be more along the lines of getting coffee or food or other supplies for the team. But clearly Tony had other plans.
"Let's do this," Tony finished definitively.
Tony wanted the machine finished in three days. A feat that had Rocket, Bruce, Nebula and I, the team that would be building the machine, gaping at him. He assured it was doable and that once he was done with the necessary suits, he would help.
In the meantime we would be starting without him.
I found working with Rocket and Nebula enjoyable. If I looked past Rocket's crude sense of humor and Nebula's cold demeanor I actually liked them. They were initially cold, Rocket questioning my abilities and Nebula seeming to genuinely just dislike everything, but after the first day of working and Rocket seeing what I was capable of with my tools, they seemed to warm up to me.
Steve kept the twins occupied being neither mechanically or scientifically inclined, he focused on them instead with help from Natasha. He set up his old room in the living quarters for them, setting up a playpen and bringing their favorite toys and things from home. It allowed him to still be close in case he was needed and allowed us to stay at the compound to save us the trouble, and time, of having to go home each night.
He insisted I get breaks, despite my protests of not needing one, pulling me away from the machine to spend at least a half hour with him and the twins to eat. At night he'd put them to bed and wait for me. I usually forced myself away around midnight or one am, going upstairs to go straight to bed and be up early the next morning to return.
I'd almost forgotten what the machine was for, about the daunting task that had been set before us. Especially when I got lost in blueprints and tools and the feeling of nostalgia and playful banter with Rocket. I didn't remember how much I had missed it until I had dusted off the tools that my father had bought me long ago and used them again. This had once been my passion and I had truly loved it. It felt wrong to have gone so long without doing it.
In between working there was downtime and we found ourselves sitting together next to the nearly complete machine enjoying some take out that Tony had graciously ordered us. The sun had set and it was the first break that we had taken all day, the excitement of the machine almost being complete spurring us on through fatigue and hunger, and it felt good to just sit.
Our conversation had been lighthearted and full of jokes from Rocket that I didn't quite get, before it suddenly became serious with one question from Bruce.
"You know," he said from where he sat right beside me, eating tacos three at a time. "I never asked you if you lost someone, Andy."
I blinked in surprise at the question, glancing at Rocket whose furry ears had perked at the question and at Nebula, who was still studying her taco. Despite trying to seem uninterested her head had raised at the question and she'd passed me a quick darting glance.
"Oh," I said around bites of food, using my napkin to wipe my mouth. "Well I lost my twin sister and my father…." I cleared my throat and felt my eyes looking down. "And my fiancé..." I purposefully left my miscarriage out.
I dared a look up and saw Bruce with a mixture of surprise and remorse on his face. "Oh."
"Fiancé? Aren't you and the Captain guy married?" Rocket interjected.
"Yes, we are."
"And you know that doing this will bring your fiancé back right?" Rocket continued looking between Bruce, who was looking like he regretted asking, and me, like we weren't understanding the dilemma. "He's gonna come back and isn't that gonna be weird for you and the Captain guy?"
"Rocket," Nebula said simply with a glaring look.
"If I was you I wouldn't want that," Rocket continued with a shrug.
"Maybe we should change the subject-," Bruce started.
"I'm just asking, I mean it's going to be awkward as-," Rocket asked raising his hands.
"It's fine," I lied doing my best to keep a smile on my face, to seem lighthearted and unshaded by the whole situation.
They all fell silent, eyes on me, Rocket still looking confused as if he didnt understand why I would be upset. He really was just stating the obvious.
I felt a tightness in my chest, one that I hadn't felt in a long time. One that had me jumping to my feet and muttering 'excuse me' as I rushed past them. I heard Bruce call after me and Nebula say Rockets name again irritably as he bellowed 'WHAT?' innocently.
I made it to the stairwell before the wheezing started, the tightness in my chest restricting my air. I stumbled up the stairs to the next landing, leaning against the wall, holding my chest and struggling to breathe. I had no misconceptions about what was about to happen, I knew that Ian was coming back, I knew I'd have to face him, and I had been telling myself that it would be fine.
But deep down the thought of facing Ian again terrified me. And I had been avoiding thinking about it by pouring myself into the machine, willfully ignoring the fact that the closer I came to completing the machine the closer I would have to come to facing that fear of my ex fiancé's return.
"Andy, I am detecting elevated respirations and heart rate from you, are you in distress?" came FRIDAY's voice above me.
"I'm fine," I wheezed.
Even the AI knew I was lying. "I will alert Captain Rogers that you are in distress," she answered.
"No, FRIDAY," I gasped shaking my head. "Please don't."
I didn't want Steve to see me this way, not for this reason. Not when he thought that I was fine, that I was okay with doing all of this.
"Captain Rogers is on the way," FRIDAY answered.
I groaned in response, turning to face the wall, pressing my forehead against the cool cement and focused on my breathing. Taking deep breaths, counting down to myself, I heard the stairwell door slam open above, hurried footsteps descending down the stairs, the warmth of Steve's hands on my back.
"Andrea, what's wrong? What happened?"
I shook my head, face still pressed into the wall, sucking in huge heaps of air.
Steve's hands moved to my arms, turning me to face him. I kept my eyes shut, letting him pull me into his embrace and wrap his arms around me tightly. It felt good as it always did, to be in his arms, and I wondered, as I often did through the years, how he managed to be so patient with me.
"Talk to me, baby," he whispered into my ear.
"I-It's nothing," I managed to lie, keeping my face pressed into his neck, breathing in his smell.
"It's clearly not, tell me what's going on," he pressed on.
"I-I'm fine. The k-kids?" I attempted to change the subject.
"They're fine. Nat is with them. What is going on?"
He wasn't going to let it go, but I couldn't answer. I remained silent, clinging to him. He didn't say anything else, just held me as a few silent moments passed. I felt grounded in his arms. My heart rate slowed to a more normal rhythm and the tightness that sat in my chest dissipated.
Steve could sense it when the panic attack passed, pulling his head back to force me to look at him. His blue eyes were full of worry, as usual, but there was something else there also. Something I couldn't read. Was it anger?
"I'm sorry," I blurted quickly, afraid he was upset.
"Don't be sorry, just tell me what happened. I hate it when you-," he broke off suddenly with a frustrated shake of his head, avoiding my gaze for the first time ever.
I felt my face fall. He was upset. "You hate it when I what?"
He took a deep breath, met my eyes again and straightened his shoulders. "I hate it when you shut down and won't talk to me. After all this time you should know you can tell me anything."
"I-I do-," I started to stutter.
"Well you don't and I should be able to comfort you."
There was anger laced with those words, anger and frustration.
I blanched, surprised and a little hurt at his words. He'd always been so patient and understanding, at least he seemed to be. At my startled look he pulled away, shaking his head again, putting one hand on his hip and the other pinched the bridge of his nose. I couldn't think of a single thing to say, so I stood quietly behind him, allowing him a moment.
"I'm sorry, Sweetheart," he breathed with a sigh. He turned back to me, his face full of guilt. "That's not fair of me to say. I just-," he stopped short again and his head dropped. "He's coming back," he finally finished.
My insides twisted. I didn't need him to elaborate on who he was talking about.
"And you say that you're fine when I know you aren't," he continued stepping toward me. "If Peggy was somehow able to come back here I wouldn't be fine. And it's okay. I understand. You had a life with him, you were going to get married. You were going to have a child and that was all snatched from you so suddenly and god, Andrea, I just…."
He stopped again with another shake of his head looking at me with a staggering amount of raw emotion on his face. My insides continued to twist, I was afraid of what he would say next.
Steve's voice lowered and his eyes dropped. "It wasn't easy in the beginning for you to choose me even with him gone. You loved him that much. And now that he's coming back I'm terrified that you'll stop choosing me."
I felt like I'd been punched in the gut, my face falling and my watery eyes releasing the tears I'd been struggling to hold back. I felt like a shitty wife, for putting him through all of this, for making him think that choosing him had ever been a hard choice. It had never been about him, I had always been the problem. My inability to let go was all about me.
And clearly it had taken a silent toll on my husband.
"I should get back to the kids-," he started after the silence lingered, turning for the stairs.
I stopped him, grabbing hold of his bicep to turn him back to me. I took his face into my hands seeing his brow furrowed in confusion.
"Please don't think that. Choosing you was never hard, Steve. You're amazing. You always have been. Letting go for me was hard, but you, being with you, loving you, was never hard," I explained looking into his eyes.
His face softened and he pressed his forehead to mine.
"When I married you I made a choice to be with you no matter what," I continued. "I love you with all of my heart. And nothing and no one will change that. I'm yours, Steven Rogers. I'm all yours."
His head popped up then, his blue eyes darkening slightly at my words. He sighed in relief and his hands found my hips, drawing me in. My arms instinctively went around his neck, his head bending to kiss me slowly and sweetly, until his lips parted to deepen the kiss. I was lost in him in an instant, fingers closing around the material of his shirt until he pulled away.
"Say it again," he demanded.
I tensed at the change in his tone. It was a tone I hadn't heard in a long time. Not since the twins were born. Full of authority and heat.
I swallowed, licking my lips to get another taste of him and tried to remember the last words I had said before. It came back after some effort. "I'm all yours."
He kissed me again, hard and hungrily, fingers digging into my hips as he did. With two quick steps I was against the cement wall, the metal railing digging into my lower back, but the slight irritation paled in comparison to the fire that suddenly overwhelmed my system. He made his intentions very clear, pressing the rapidly growing hardness between us into me.
"Steve," I moaned when he finally let up to give us both air. "Here?"
It was the only words that I could manage to get out between panted breaths. It was very hard to focus when his mouth was leaving a wet trail down my throat and his hands had eagerly come up to knead my breasts. Plus there was the fact that it had been too long since we had done this, even our attempt the night before being interrupted by Emma waking from her nap. But as much as I wanted it, him, we were in a public stairwell where anyone could come looking for either of us at any moment.
He grunted positively in answer, nodding into my skin, mouth never detaching from my throat. Using his body he pressed me harder into the wall, hands quickly going for my pants.
I struggled to make my brain connect to my mouth and send out words. "Someone could come-."
He cut off my protests with another deep kiss, clearly not worried, making quick work of the button and zipper to my pants, hand delving inside until he found warmth and slipped two fingers between my lips. The thoughts of stopping him immediately left my brain, being replaced with an overwhelming need to come, arching off the wall when he pressed two fingers into me and picked up a quick rhythm. In an embarrassingly short amount of time I was seconds away from coming.
"Say it again," he demanded in my ear, in that same tone, the heat of his breath sending goosebumps down my neck. The Captain had returned and god how I had missed him.
I ordered my brain to function. "I'm...I'm all yours...God, Steve, please."
I was milliseconds away now, feeling the flutter of my walls around his fingers. I gripped his shoulders hard, trying to anchor myself, knowing something earth shattering was coming. I clamped my lips shut, knowing that if I opened my mouth, the sounds that would come out would be far too loud. I tried to close my eyes and lean my head back on the wall, but Steve's grip on my hip tightened.
"Eyes on me, Andrea," he ordered.
I could barely handle the fiery intensity in his blue gaze.
"You going to come?" His voice was a husky groan.
Yes. God, yes.
"You know what you have to do if you want to come," he continued, slowing down, leaving me to let out a frustrated moan. "Ask me."
I couldn't. Opening my mouth would release the multitude of sounds that I'd been holding back and likely alert the whole building to what we were doing. I tried to show that in my desperate look, biting my lip even harder as I shook my head just once.
He gritted his teeth and looked at me sternly. "Ask. Me."
My lips parted, a desperate moan falling from them immediately. "Captain, please." It was all I could manage.
"Captain, please what?"
I felt my eyes roll and it took all my willpower to speak. "Cap-Captain, please can I come?"
He picked up speed again and with it came a pleasure overload that had me biting my lip to stifle any sounds. The pleasure exploded and I was a shuddering whimpering bag of bones against the wall, Steve's body was the only thing that kept me standing. He never stopped, groaning in satisfaction as I came.
"That's it, good girl," he whispered. He maintained his speed and rhythm, dragging me right back toward that peak. "You're gonna keep coming all over my fingers right here where anyone can walk in and see what a trembling mess I turn you into."
His dirty talk only added to it all, sending thrills through me and pushing me right back over the edge. I bit down on my lip harder to keep from crying out. I trembled as I came again, somehow managing to stay upright and stifle my moans as the pleasure burst inside of every cell in my body. Dazed and still feeling like I was floating, I barely registered my body moving until I was suddenly facing the wall, my cheek pressed to the cool cement.
It was during that brief reprieve that I came back to my rational senses. Steve fingering me in the stairwell was one thing, a very inappropriate thing, but not nearly as bad as sex, which I was guessing Steve intended for us to have when he reached between us. I could hear the sounds of him undoing his belt. He reached for the sides of my jeans, pushing them down my hips. Pulling my lower body closer, bowing my back, I could feel the hardness of him along my ass.
"Someone could come in," I tried to warn him again.
"No ones coming in," he answered in a rough almost desperate voice, fingers digging into my hips.
My nails scraped on the railing, trying to steady myself as he slowly pressed in, hissing in delight at the familiar stretch and feeling of fullness. Steve groaned softly, wasting no time in using his vice like hold on my hips to hold me still and set the pace he wanted. Quick, deep, borderline punishing thrusts. With one hand between my shoulder blades and the other on my hip, he held me in place, leaving me with nothing to do, but take it. And I was willing. He grunted out his pleasure, the grunts interspersed with moans and groans and praises.
I was lost in the sensations, forehead pressed to the wall, teeth digging into my lip and ready to implode. My lips parted the closer I came to my peak, moans and chants of Steve's title spilling out as I lost control, growing louder with each thrust. Steve leaned closer, hand leaving my back, curving around my face to cover my mouth. I knew he was close when his smooth steady repetitive rhythm got sporadic and desperate, and I was not far behind. He bucked against me, once, twice, and I came undone, his palm muffling my loud moans and my body seizing around him. He followed right after me, thrusting upward hard and fast one last time before he spilled into me.
He collapsed against my back, I could feel his heart racing while I tried to catch my breath and steady my own heart.
"Jesus, Sweetheart," he sighed, breath warm on my neck.
He pressed a kiss to my neck, releasing his hold and stepping back. I straightened on shaky limbs turning in time to see him tucking himself back into his pants. He'd gone red, an embarrassed look on his face. The Captain had exited the building and Sweet Steve had returned.
There was silence as we both righted our clothes, a lingering tension there that wasn't sexual.
"I'm sorry," he spoke finally, shaking his head and looking remorseful. "I don't know what that was…not that I didn't enjoy it," he added with a sheepish hesitant grin, which quickly faded. "And about what I said before… about Ian coming-."
I held up a hand to stop him. "You don't have to apologize. You are entitled to feel what you feel and if anything it's my fault for making you think that I would ever have a hard time choosing you."
Steve sighed, stepping toward me again. "It's not that. I know you love me. I have never doubted it. But if I was in your shoes…"
I took his hands in mine and squeezed them tenderly. "I promise you that between us nothing will change."
I meant every word. Facing Ian would be hard, as would breaking his heart, but my feelings for Steve could never change. Nor would I want to give up the life that he and I had built together. I loved Steve too much to do that. I loved our children too much.
Steve nodded once and tried to smile down at me, I hated to see the hint of doubt in his eyes. He reached up to touch my cheek.
"I didn't hurt you did I?" He asked softly, glancing at the wall and back to me.
I chuckled, shaking my head. "No, you didn't. Honestly, it was nice to see The Captain again after all this time."
Steve blushed crimson and opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by the sound of the stairwell door opening from the floor below us. We looked over the railing to see Tony looking around for us.
"Up here," I called with a wave, trying to hide the sudden guilt I felt at the thought of what Steve and I had been doing moments before.
Tony looked up, excitement and fear on his face. "The machine is done."
