Chapter 27
Orihime and Ulquiorra took his car back into Karakura the following Saturday, even though it was Orihime's day off. They needed to get some clarification from Urahara regarding his assessments of the Cifers. Orihime decided the drive over would be a good opportunity to discuss something with Ulquiorra that had been nagging at her over the course of the week.
"So, I have a question for you," she started, trying to be casual.
"Hmmm?" he voiced as he sat behind the wheel, focusing on the road. "What is your question?"
"On my birthday, you had left a box on my old bed, and you mentioned wanting to show it to me, but we never got to it. What was that?"
A heavy sigh left Ulquiorra and he glanced at Orihime. After the night of sex and hedonism, he didn't feel it was right to show his girlfriend the item in the box. "It was something trivial and idiotic. Just old memories."
"I think it's kind of insensitive to call old memories trivial to someone dealing with memory loss, but I will let it slide," she teased. "Still, why would you call it trivial? You obviously wanted to show me, and I'll be honest, I am very curious."
"I've already shown it to you," Ulquiorra replied. "A picture of it, but I was going to show you the real thing."
"I want to see it," she said, looking over at him. "For real."
He glanced at her again. "Can you tell me why you want to see it?"
"I don't know. I just do. Would it make you feel better if I showed you some of my old memories? I keep a box of journals and keepsakes in my closet. We could exchange?" she offered hopefully.
"Is there something you hope to accomplish with this?"
She sighed softly. "I don't know. Maybe it will help me feel closer to you. Maybe it will help unlock my memories. Maybe."
Those words made him rethink his stance on the subject. He was silent for several moments as he drove. "Don't you want to know what's in the box? I could be giving you a head or something."
She laughed. "What a gruesome idea. Well if it is a severed head, at least I'll know to run for the hills," she laughed again. "Seriously though, I want to know. You can tell me if you want, but I want to see it the way you imagined showing me before."
Ulquiorra turned his head and looked at the woman. "You will let me read your innermost thoughts for a chance to see my helmet and hear the story behind it?"
She grinned. "I will, but I have to warn you, after I write my journals, I almost never read them again; they're too cringe-inducing. But you might find some pictures or crappy poetry in there too," she said with an embarrassed laugh.
He chuckled. "I will show you if you really want to see it. But it will have to wait until after this excursion."
Orihime clapped her hands twice. "Yay!" she cheered softly. "I'm kind of excited, not just to see your thing, but I kind of wonder… Oh. Oh dear. Can I modify my offer?" Her face was starting to turn a brilliant shade of red as she remembered some of her most recent entries.
"All sales are final but I'm willing to compromise." Ulquiorra gave her a smile.
"No. No, you're right, but be forewarned, the last volume was thrown into the box after we met, and I kind of… Oh god, this is embarrassing."
This time the smile widened. "What did you write?"
"Um… I kind of wrote about how hot I thought Kaz's new teacher was? And I might have mentioned a dirty dream?" She was about to die of mortification.
Biting his lower lip, Ulquiorra thought about the words his girlfriend could have written and smirked. "Did you ever imagine you'd be with his hot teacher?"
She squirmed a bit. "Ulquiorra," she whined. "You'll know when you read it, but if you must know… Yes. You, uh, you were the first man I felt attracted to after my husband died, and it wasn't just a little bit, either."
"Woman, you must know as soon as I saw you I wanted to make you mine."
"Are you sure about that? Because I distinctly remember you overpaying for an inappropriate plant and running away like I had the plague."
"That was the best plant I've ever purchased. Not to mention my kid probably ate my change in cake. I ran from you because I was scared."
"Scared of what? I am practically a kitten. A baby bunny is scarier than me."
A soft scoff left him. "I was afraid that you'd leave me again. That you wouldn't want me. That you would take one look at me and say no." Ulquiorra sighed as they got closer to the shoten. "I'm still afraid that will happen."
Orihime's heart broke a little hearing him admit that, and she put a hand on his shoulder. "I would never leave you, Ulquiorra. Not just because of the baby, either, although that is a big thing. I love you. My heart is not fickle."
"Why did you choose Kurosaki the first time?" he asked, hating himself for how the words rolled off his tongue like a reflex. He should not be bringing this up. He knew why she had chosen the shinigami over him. "I apologize," Ulquiorra stated.
"It's a fair question, Ulquiorra," she said, but sighed a bit, aware that he wasn't going to like the answer. "I chose him because I loved him. I loved him long before I went to Hueco Mundo. We were comrades. I thought he was kind and good looking. He did the same kinds of things that Kazui does sometimes; made me feel special without even trying." She squeezed Ulquiorra's arm and continued, "I know you said we had something between us in Hueco Mundo, and I'm sorry that I cannot remember. I'm sorry that I did something that made you feel abandoned. But you once said you didn't realize you loved me until you were dying. I don't know how I felt, but I know that your death hurt me. Still, I want you to know that I don't think I chose Ichigo over you; I think I just chose him before I knew you. My heart is not fickle, like I said. And honestly, he and I had a lot of good years. We had a nice life, until we didn't. And sadly, we didn't for a couple years before he died." She cringed by the time she was done, worried that she had said too much.
Ulquiorra gave a nod as if he understood what she was saying. He didn't understand, because he never saw the proof that Kurosaki had any interest in her. The ginger had doubted Orihime's loyalty. "It's in the past; let's put it behind us."
"There's one more thing I want you to know, and I warn you, it's going to sound like I'm a horrible person. I don't mean it that way, but I don't think there is a way to say it without sounding that way. I'm glad that he died. I'm glad that I met him and married him and had Kazui and led my young life how I did, and I'm glad that he died and that I met you at this time in my life. I have never been happier than I am now."
As Ulquiorra pulled near the shoten and turned the car off, he looked at Orihime. "If you're a horrible person because of that, then I am too. I'm glad that you are able to be with me."
She took his hands in hers, bringing them toward her and kissing the backs of his thumbs. "No regrets. Not a single one."
He kissed the backs of her hands and then smiled at her. "Shall we go in and hear what Urahara has to say?"
She nodded. "Let's go." She didn't wait for him to lead as she opened the door and started toward the shop.
The shoten was quiet when they walked in together. Urahara was waiting behind the counter, sitting on a stool. "Good morning. What can I do for you two?"
"Well, for starters, how about some specificity? Has your research brought anything new to light?" Orihime asked, not appreciating the shopkeeper's obtuseness.
The blond man's eyes darted back and forth between the woman and other man. "I've come to the conclusion that Cifer is a type of Vizard."
"What about Eriko?" Ulquiorra asked.
It was then the man stood and walked over to the door that would lead them into the living area of the place. "Come," he said.
Orihime nodded and followed Urahara, reaching behind her for her boyfriend's hand. She didn't know why, but she felt mildly relieved at Urahara's classification of Ulquiorra. The familiarity of the Vizards to her was probably it, she decided. Several of them had been kind to her in the past.
While Ulquiorra knew he wasn't exactly hollow, he had not been expecting the diagnosis of Vizard. He was a mix of hollow and human. "Why can't you just tell us?" he asked as they walked into a different room.
"Because this is going to be a long discussion, Cifer. Please have a seat," Urahara said, gesturing for the two to sit at the small table in the middle of the room.
"Why?" Orihime asked as she got down carefully to the ground, using the table as support. Her belly had popped out a bit over the past week and she felt off-balance.
"Cifer, how is the power of an Arrancar tested? How is it measured?"
Ulquiorra looked at Urahara and shrugged. "I've no clue. I would guess the more power a hollow had the more human their appearance was. It's what I overheard Aizen saying to Gin."
"Gigais are just meat suits. They're for containing a soul. Sometimes we need failsafes put onto these containers. I was not aware that Gigais were able to reproduce."
"What if..." the green-eyed man stopped for a moment to think this question over. "Wait, what about Isshin?"
"I'm getting to that," he said. "If it was just a soul in a gigai, I don't think it would be able to reproduce. With having souls that are of Espada class and Captain class…"
"Well?"
"It's your soul that made Eriko," Urahara said.
Ulquiorra looked at the man absolutely shocked and then he turned to Orihime. "What is he saying?"
Orihime looked back at him wide-eyed and bewildered. "I think he means that your soul is so powerful that it is able to reproduce? Maybe it has creative properties? I don't know. Isshin was a shinigami captain and he sired children while in a gigai. He told me he always wanted children and wished he had more, so maybe it was just a function of wish fulfillment and having the spiritual virility to pull it off?" she theorized.
Urahara nodded and decided to add to it. "Cifer, you are powerful. I put you in a heavy duty Gigai and you burned through it. I put dampeners in so that you could live as a human. That's what you wanted. It's the power of your soul that allowed you to reproduce, not the gigai. You passed down your powers or you passed some of them on to your daughter."
His forehead wrinkled as he sought to make sense of all of this. "Because I have a high spiritual pressure…"
"Think about it, Ulquiorra. When Eriko was conceived, how did you feel? Had you been dissatisfied with your life? Did you feel adrift? Were you, on some level, searching for greater purpose or connection?" Orihime asked.
"I was surviving. I took comfort in my routine. Yuko was around. The night Eriko was made, she gave me a pill."
Orihime shook her head in apparent disapproval of Yuko's use of drugs to seduce Ulquiorra and asked, "So did this pill negate your inhibitions? Make you drop your guard?"
He was silent for several seconds. "It made me want her. It made me feel free, like I was flying."
She did not need to know that he wanted Yuko, she thought to herself, as a little stab of jealousy made her belly burn and brow crease. "TMI," she muttered under her breath before continuing at a regular volume, "Anyway, when Three was conceived, or around then, how did you feel?"
"I'm not sure. I knew I wanted a connection to you. I knew that I felt desire for you. I felt love," Ulquiorra stated before he felt his face grow warm.
"You told me that you loved me that day," Orihime replied as her features relaxed into a gentle smile and that jealous pang gave way to a pleasant bubbling sensation in her chest at the memory. She held his hand despite their audience. "Your soul perhaps wished to cement our bond. There is no more effective way than creating a new life together, I think."
He only became more confused. "But I don't understand. I never felt love toward Yuko. She was familiar to me. I somewhat enjoyed spending my free time with her."
"Ulquiorra, there are reasons other than love to wish for connections with people. You'd been living as a human for years at that point. You were probably lonely. Maybe Yuko would not have fulfilled that void, but Eriko could. You absolutely love her."
He still didn't understand. Ulquiorra had never been lonely. He enjoyed his time to himself. As an Espada he didn't need to rely on any other creature. "So my body knew I was subconsciously lonely and decided to mate?"
"Cifer, that's a brash way of thinking about it but, yes, somewhat. Each instance that you've been able to reproduce your soul wanted something." Urahara looked at the woman. "Hime-chan seems to grasp this better than you."
A memory assaulted the woman's consciousness and for a few moments she seemed to lose focus, looking almost through Ulquiorra as she spoke in an immature, hollow tone, "What is the heart? You won't find it in my chest or skull, Ulquiorra. It's the thread that binds us together. It's the reason I cannot fear you. It's the reason you won't—" Her words were cut off with a harsh gasp as she snapped back to reality and her eyes came back into focus. "What was that?" She asked him, totally spooked.
The green-eyed man's mouth dropped open. She sounded just like she as he left the caja negacion. "I have no clue," he replied. "Did you remember something?"
"I think so," she whispered. "It felt like a memory."
"I've asked you several times that question. I asked you if I crack open your chest or skull, would I find it," Ulquiorra said. "I asked you if you were afraid of me. It wasn't Tsukishima, Orihime."
"I remember thinking about what you said. I remember knowing that you wouldn't hurt me. We were already connected…" she murmured, sliding her hand up his arm and leaning against it with a trembling sigh. "You and me. It was you and me in that fortress, wasn't it?"
Ulquiorra nodded. He glanced at Urahara for a moment. "Can you help us?"
"I don't know if I can," the blond man replied.
Orihime was shaken. It seemed to her that although she recalled her own thoughts about that conversation and her grief when Ulquiorra died, she still could not remember him. And beyond that, she felt like there was something else, something worse, that was blocked from her recollection. It was starting to give her stress. "Ow," she hissed, feeling a twinge of pain shoot from her hip up her spine, and the onset of a headache take hold as her features took on a pinched expression.
His arms went around Orihime and he stroked her back as he held her. "Is there anyway to speak to this Tsukishima?"
"I have no clue, Cifer. The last I heard of the Fullbringers is that they were under the observation of Mayuri Kurotsuchi. He'd much rather have me arrested than talk to me," Urahara said.
The man sighed. He wanted to help Orihime with this, but didn't know how. He wanted to break whatever mental wall all those memories were hiding behind. "Would you like to go home, Orihime?"
She nodded. "I'm sorry; we came here for answers."
"It's fine, Orihime. We can always come back or perhaps we can use the phone to converse. We don't need to be around people who trigger things like this," Ulquiorra stated. He got to his feet and then helped Orihime up.
She leaned into him, cupping her forehead with one hand. "I don't know what is wrong with me. I think I just need to remember. Once I can just remember everything should be fine. I'm thirsty though. Let's go back to the shop; it's closer and we can take something to drink upstairs and rest a bit."
Ulquiorra practically hovered over Orihime, making sure she was okay. He didn't want something serious to happen to her. He decided to bring something up as he got her settled in upstairs with some tea. "I think we should hire another person to help out. I can't be here during the day while the shop is actually open except on the weekends. Although Riruka was useless at times, I'm sure we will need to find someone to fill her spot."
Orihime groaned, squeezing her eyes closed. "I know. I know, I don't want to, but I know. I've already written an advertisement. I didn't want to have to, but Satomi can't take many more hours, and by the end of the day my feet and ankles are swollen and my back is sore. I didn't want you to worry, but that part is getting worse, not better."
"Orihime," he said, coming to sit on the bed where she was. "I worry about you regardless. I'm constantly thinking about you and wondering if you're okay. I love you, Woman, I only want to see you happy."
"I know. I'll post the ad tomorrow," she answered, leaning her head on his shoulder. "Oh! I remember one thing, at least," she said, sitting straight and then taking a sip of tea before setting it down and standing up. "I'll be right back!" There was a smile in her voice that wasn't there before.
Ulquiorra raised an eyebrow then frowned at his girlfriend. She really was like night and day at times. At least he got her to agree to hire another person to help out.
A shuffling sound could be heard from the closet, then a soft thud. "God bless it," Orihime muttered in irritation, then more shuffling sounds. After another minute, Ulquiorra heard a triumphant voice call, "Ah ha! Success!"
Orihime returned to the bed and set a yellow plastic tote with a light purple cover on the bed beside Ulquiorra. It was heavier than she remembered, and she released it with a soft, "Oof. There, as promised, half a lifetime of memories. Maybe you'll find something in there that would be helpful. At least you might find something amusing. I'm pretty sure there are pictures in there," she said with a giggle. Part of her was hoping to capture yet more of his heart with this gesture.
Oh, they were doing this exchange now? His gaze flickered to her face and he gave her a small smile. "I took the box home, so you'll have to wait for the other half of this agreement."
"It's fine, we should take it with us and get back to the kids soon anyway. I just want to rest my back for a minute," she said, reclining across the bed.
"You were a lot younger when you had Kazui. Perhaps we should find an actual doctor that deals with pregnancy." Ulquiorra didn't like the idea, but maybe there was something wrong with Orihime… Something Isshin couldn't fix.
"Are you calling me old, Cifer?" Orihime asked, scowling at him in jest. "I guess I am. Anyway, I have a check up in two weeks. I'll talk to Isshin before that, though, just to be sure."
Ulquiorra bit his lip to stifle a chuckle. He was implying that she was old, but not decrepit. "Thank you. It will put my mind at ease. I do appreciate everything you do, Orihime. I want you to know that." He laid a hand on her thigh before laying down beside her.
"Ooh!" she peeped, raising her head off the bed and looking down at her belly in concentrated silence for a moment.
"What?" He sat up in alarm. Had he harmed her? Did he hurt her? "Do I need to call Isshin? Do you need medical attention?"
A smile appeared before she spoke, in almost a whisper, "No, I think I just felt the baby move. It's just a flutter; you wouldn't be able to feel it from the outside. It's kind of early, but I'm pretty sure…" her eyes found his, and they sparkled with joy.
His face relaxed and Ulquiorra moved his hand to her abdomen. "You are pretty sure what? What do you mean you felt the baby move. How can you feel that?"
"The baby has space to swim around in there. When he is big enough, when he touches the wall or jerks, I'll be able to feel it. As he gets bigger you'll be able to feel and maybe even see it."
"That's terrifying," Ulquiorra commented while retracting his hand. He looked at her before he kissed her. "And to think you have to feel all of that."
"You won't think so when you feel it, I promise. Your little soccer player will make himself known," she said with a chuckle.
"You think it's a boy?"
She looked a bit like she had been caught by his question, her cheeks coloring and lips pursing before she nodded. "Yeah, I've thought so for a couple of weeks now. I don't know why, it's just a strong feeling. I didn't want to say anything though."
"Oh," he said. Ulquiorra frowned for a moment. He was kind of stuck on Orihime having a girl. He knew what female children were like. He had no experience with males. "As long as they're healthy."
Orihime chewed on the inside of her cheek, thinking for a moment. "Well, if Three is a boy, Eriko would have no competition for the title of "daddy's princess", so it might make things easier," the woman countered.
"Eriko already has competition for being the princess," he said.
"Who?" Orihime's mouth froze in an 'o' shape, her brow wrinkled in confusion.
"You? Doesn't your name mean princess too?"
Orihime's face lit up as she laughed. "I suppose it does, but I'm too old to be a princess, remember?"
"I never said you were old. You made came to that conclusion on your own," Ulquiorra said. He was going to say more but his phone rang. It was Eriko's ringtone. "That would be our children."
"Duty calls. Can you bring the box? It's a bit heavy."
Ulquiorra helped her up before he grabbed the tote. "Lead the way," he said.
A/N: Thanks for reading! Let us know what you think of Urahara's diagnosis!
