8: "It's not your fault."

I don't know how many times Lydia said that to me, but I didn't believe it.

She called Derek and explained what happened. He came within minutes. Liam and Cameron were with him. Liam and Cameron took the witnesses away to speak with them while Derek worked the scene to make it look like Nick had fallen onto a torn wire fence near the water and it cut him in half. Liam and Cameron convinced the witnesses of the story. Derek called the police; then Peter.

Watching Peter get upset for Nick almost overwhelmed me with guilt. He cared about all of his foster kids. Even after the police took his body away, Peter struggled with what happened.

Derek wouldn't even look at me. He was attempting to keep the story from collapsing, but I knew that he could have looked at me if he wanted to.

I remember staring at Justin a few times. He was usually the one out of us who cried about anything. This time, though, he just had a blank look on his face and stayed near Liam. At first, Liam didn't seem the least bit interested in Justin, but as we walked back to the halfway house, Justin took Liam's hand and he didn't pull away.

"Stay in the house," Derek ordered Liam and Cameron when we reached our destination.

Cameron went straight to Derek's uncle, leading Peter back to his room. The other guys went to their own rooms. Liam led Justin to his room and they both went in and closed the door. I became alarmed and asked Derek, "What is Liam doing with Justin?"

"Nothing you need to worry about," Derek stated.

I wanted to go after Justin, but Lydia took my arm and told me softly, "He'll be alright. I won't let anything happen to him."

I knew that Lydia was telling the truth. I nodded and she directed me outside to my tent room. Derek followed us. As soon as I sat down on my bed, Lydia left to keep an eye on Justin, and I was alone with Derek.

He folded his arms and stared at me for almost a minute in stark silence. His eyes were sometimes more frightening than words. My own eyes filled with hot tears as I tried to argue, "I was trying to do a good thing. I'm sorry."

Derek's body was tense, but his voice was calm as he asked, "Tell me what happened. From the beginning."

I started when Nick saw me kiss Mason. I explained what I overheard Nick say about me being a problem. I explained my assumption that Nick would be asking around to get information, and I explained why I thought he needed to see Malia for himself to know I didn't do anything to her. I even went on to explain what Malia and I said to each other, the blow job in the bathroom, and Malia's rage before she made it look like she was going for Lydia, then sidetracked and went after Nick, instead. I was as detailed as possible, so Derek could understand my reasoning for doing what I did.

When I finished, he asked with concern, "Did she hurt you?"

"What do you mean?" I returned.

He glanced down at my crotch and rephrased, "Did she hurt you?"

I realized what he meant and my cheeks felt hot as I answered, "No, she was careful."

Derek stared intensely at the rush of blood to my face. He had to clear his throat before going on, "You shouldn't have told her that Nick was troubling you. She assumed that made him a threat. According to the rules of female werewolves, killing for a potential mate is the highest honor. She will expect praise from you if you ever see her, again."

I asked with alarm, "What is that supposed to mean? Why wouldn't I see her, again?"

Derek made a frustrated sigh and informed me, "You're under her spell, Stiles. She's made you her only focus, and you're absorbing her emotions and making them your own because that's what she wants you to do. The more you make contact with her, the stronger her spell becomes."

"No, I've already told her that I'm bonded to you," I stated.

With a short nod, Derek clarified, "You are bonded to me, yes, but the bond of a female is on a totally different level. It is possible to be bonded to both of us, but Malia's emotions are so unstable, she might fight me to the death to keep her bond exclusive."

"Why didn't you tell me about all of this? Why would you keep this from me?" I argued.

Derek's voice rose for the first time as he countered angrily, "I didn't think you would ever need to know all of this because I was confident I could trust you to stay away from her!"

"If you had told me this, Nick would still be alive!" I stood up and yelled.

Derek spat back, "You made me erase your memories and forget about us because you thought you couldn't trust me, and now you've gone behind my back, risked the lives of Lydia and everyone else in this house, including my uncle's, and not only gave Malia an official invite, but allowed her into your mind and gave her the motivation to kill, and you think this is my problem?!"

I was so angry, I seethed at him, "If I knew a good way to kill you, werewolf, I would do it right now!"

Derek's eyes widened with shock, then he narrowed them again and stated, "I'd like to see your best shot against me, human."

He was making me so pissed, I yelled out of spite, "I'm going to Mason's house!"

Derek blinked with surprise and watched me walk out of the tent. He came out after me and argued, "You aren't going to his house! I already called him and told him not to come over!"

"Well too bad, 'cause I'm going!" I shrieked.

"Get your ass back here, Stilinski! I'm not finished chewing it out!" Derek ordered.

I flipped him off and argued, "Fuck you! I'm going to let Mason chew on my ass for a while!"

Derek was heaving with ferocity. His face was so tense, it looked like he had peeled his skin off and pulled it back to make it look longer and thinner. His dark eyes had turned a shade of bright red. He was more predatory than I had ever seen him, before.

I instinctively took off running. I had no clue why I did it, because I knew full well I couldn't outrun him. I managed to put a whole block of distance between us, but then I rounded the corner and Derek tackled me. He shoved me into someone's yard, using enough of his strength to send me sliding across the grass and straight into a pool. I panicked as soon as I hit the water because my mind was too stunned to realize why solid ground had just turned into liquid.

My panic made me want to breathe, and my lungs filled with water. I was drowning before I could even register why I wasn't getting any air.

I started fighting against the water to get to air. Probably only seconds had passed, but it felt like I was moving in slow motion. My stomach got a sinking feeling and I was on the verge of passing out.

I felt a hand grab me by the back of the neck. I was pulled out of the water and into the air I had so desired. I was gently lowered to my hands and knees on the grass, where I proceeded to choke on and empty the contents of water from my stomach and lungs.

When I finished, I collapsed from exhaustion. I felt the same hand as before turning me over until I was on my back. It was much easier to breathe this way and I was grateful.

I looked to my side to see who the hand belonged to and saw Derek on his knees next to me. His face and eyes were normal again and full of concern as he analyzed me for signs of damage. When he was sure I would be alright, he waited patiently until my breathing got closer to normal.

"Why did you toss me into a pool?" I asked weakly.

"I'm sorry, Stiles. I was angry and I lost control," Derek answered.

I looked him right in the eyes and said, "Now you know how Malia feels."

Then I closed my eyes and blacked out.