Eren watched with horror as Levi was led out of the courtroom in cuffs, his head bowed, refusing to meet anyone else's eyes. The room was full of noise, but he couldn't decipher any of it, whether it was outrage or approval. He tried to get up out of his chair to go after him, but he was once again held down by his lawyer.
"If you beat him up here, it'll negate the charges they just passed and you'll be sent to prison along with him," his lawyer sad to him. "I can understand the desire to want to take revenge here, but I'd advise against it."
Eren gazed at him in open surprise. Is that what he thought? He thought he was trying to hurt Levi? What nonsense! Though at the moment, it was probably for the best, considering. Still, it disgusted him to think that anyone thought that he wanted to hurt Levi.
The boy heard something about how he was going to be declared not guilty on the grounds of Levi admitting that it had been his idea, and therefore Eren wasn't to blame. He was also going to be sent home, but he didn't care to listen. His entire world had narrowed down to Levi's retreating back as he was escorted from the court room to the holding room where he would be staying until the wagon would show up to carry him off to Lafayette Central Prison.
No, they couldn't take him! Eren could feel his entire world crumbling around him at the very thought. For a moment, the courtroom disappeared, and all he could see was the wagon showing up to haul his mother away while she screamed and reached for her children, saying over and over again how they needed her. Eren felt sick, so sick that for a moment he felt as if he would throw up. He couldn't let Levi suffer the same fate.
The moment court was adjourned and his cuffs were removed, he shot up out of his seat and sought out his sister, already practically hyperventilating. Some people looked at him with concern, before perhaps they remembered what had been said in court, that he was crazy, so they excused his behavior and looked away again. He grasped onto Mikasa's shawl and sleeves, pleading with her with his eyes, and then his voice.
"He can't," he said, choked up, "Levi just can't- it's not true, none of it's true, don't believe a word of it, Mikasa! I told you before, how could you believe any of it? He didn't hurt me, he"-
"Eren!" she cut him off with a hiss, looking around to see if anyone was paying attention to them. Thankfully, at the moment, everyone seemed to be minding their own business, focusing on clearing out of the room. She glanced at the door behind Eren, the door Levi had left through, and then at her father and Benjamin.
"Can you wait for us by the entrance?" she asked her husband. "We'll need a need a minute."
Benjamin nodded. "Of course."
She appreciated how he wasn't one to talk needlessly. He didn't ask whether things were okay or not, because he knew things weren't okay. He knew they needed time alone to calm down and he wasn't going to ask any further questions, because he knew they wouldn't be appreciated. So, he simply flashed Mikasa a look of love and support and nodded at Eren, before he walked past them, catching up with Grisha and relaying what Mikasa was going to do, before they disappeared out of the room.
"Alright," she said, "come with me."
"W-What?"
But he didn't have to wonder for long, because to his surprise, she was grabbing his wrist and pulling him hastily out of the room, looking left and right to see if anyone had noticed them. They kept going, down a hallway, Mikasa ignoring any questions he had and just told him to keep his mouth shut. So he did, choosing that it was just best to trust her.
They went around a couple of corners, both of them still keeping a watch out for any witnesses, but at the moment, there were none. So, they kept going, until they made it to an innocuous room that would have been easily overlooked. It almost blended into the wall, save for a tiny window. The other reason that the room was visible was because there were two guards standing in front of it. Eren halted, pulling his arm out of her grip.
"Mikasa," he whispered loudly. "What do you think you're doing? I don't think we should be here!"
"Relax," she assured him, glancing at him over her shoulder. "I found this room this morning before the trial started."
Eren watched in astonishment as she just kept walking, right up to the guards. They glared at her, and the boy prepared to race forward and defend her from them. But she just smiled sweetly up at them, so strange and uncharacteristic for her. However, Eren knew she could be charming when she wanted to be, but how would that do her any good against two burly armed guards?
"Give us ten minutes," she asked them both, and her tone left no room for argument.
Eren's jaw nearly fell on the floor when they actually listened to her, looking at each other before one of them unlocked the door for her. What was going on?
Mikasa glanced back at her brother and waved him over, explaining, "It's amazing what a little money and persuasion will do. I um, spoke to these gentlemen this morning about the possibility of allowing us access back here and keeping their mouths shut about it. So come on, move it."
She was crazy, that had to be it. Bribing people in the law field? She was practically asking to be arrested! There was nothing that would be worth putting her own reputation on the line for, there couldn't be. At least, that's what he thought, until he followed her over and squeezed his way through the gap in the door and entered the room behind her. Mikasa stepped aside, remaining by the door so that Eren could see just who was occupying this room, saying she would keep a look out. And it was a good thing she told this to him while his attention was still on her, because the moment he saw who was in here, he forgot about the rest of the world completely.
Levi was sitting on the only bench in the room, looking completely broken and hopeless. His hands were still shackled behind his back, and he seemed resigned to his fate. He was going to prison, and there was no longer any hope of getting out of it. He had done this to himself, and now it was time to face his punishment.
But when he heard the door click open and his name gasped in elation on the other side of the room, it prompted him to lift his head. However, he didn't even time to see who it was before they were rushing at him and pulling him into their arms, squeezing him so hard that he couldn't breathe. However, he didn't have to see them to know who it was; a familiar smell reached his nose, a smell he knew from many nights spent huddled together for warmth, nights of passion, embraces in the sunshine and mornings sleeping in. After so long of being separated from it, of being afraid, it was like an oasis in a desert. Tears filled his eyes, the opposite wall blurring as his face crumpled, and he began sobbing in earnest. Though whether it was from relief, or sadness, or fear, he had no idea. Maybe a combination of all three. After spending weeks of holding it in, all of his emotion was flooding forth.
Levi buried his face in Eren's shoulder, his back heaving as his boy cried as well. He dearly wanted to hug him as well, to cling to him for all he was worth, and it was so cruel that his arms were pinned behind his back so that he couldn't. So instead, he scooted forward until he was practically in his lap, getting as close to him as possible so that there were almost no gaps between their bodies.
And for that small pocket in time, he was safe. He was in Eren's arms, and nothing could hurt him. Everything was okay now.
"My Doll," Eren cried, "my Levi. My poor, poor Levi. You're so stupid! Why would you say such terrible things like that? Why would you destroy yourself like that?"
"So that you could be safe," Levi answered without hesitation, though it came out garbled and wet because of his tears.
"Oh horse shit," the boy chastised, "I'm not worth it!"
"Well then, why did you agree to get married and give up what you love? So that I could remain in your home with you. I would argue I'm not worth that either. So we're either both worth it or neither of us are."
"But that doesn't even compare to"-
"Eren. Shut up."
For some reason, perhaps it was because he was slightly hysterical at the moment anyway, that short, curt and very Levi-ish response just made him burst out laughing. It was disgusting, snot-filled congested laughter, but it was laughter, which was very much welcomed at this point. He buried his face in the older man's shoulder as he got his giggles out, and said, "You're still an idiot. My selfless idiot. Not that it matters, but I guess we're even now. I don't want to rack up any more debts between us of this kind though, got it?"
Levi wiped his eyes and nose on the boy's shoulder. It was alright, he was just wearing a prison uniform. He answered, "Yeah, got it."
For a moment, they just sat there, drinking each other in, neither of them wanting to separate from the other. Eren was rubbing his back, trying to calm him down, so happy that he was finally able to hold his love in his arms while Levi basked in his warmth.
"So you're only going to be there for two years, yeah?" Eren asked.
"Yeah."
"Well, don't worry. It'll go by like that. And when you get out, we'll be waiting for you. Me, Prince, and Hanji. All of our other friends too. We'll find somewhere else to have our meetups with them, and by that time, construction on our house will have started. Until it's done, we can move out and hide somewhere else. I'm done pretending to be what my father wants. We'll go and hide, and while we're there, I'll start painting again, and we're getting your book published. We'll find a way past this. If this experience has taught me anything, it's that life is too short. It's time we started living for ourselves and doing what we want."
Levi started crying all over again, his tears wetting the other boy's shirt. "We will," he gasped. "As soon as I get out of here, I'm yours….but wait, what about Emma?"
He pulled out of the embrace, looking at him worriedly. Eren just smiled sadly and said, "This will be good for her too. She deserves someone who truly loves her and who can give her children. I know she cares for me, and on a certain, humanistic level, I care for her too. But I can't be there for her in the way that she needs because my heart belongs to you."
Levi sniffed, and Eren wiped away his tears with his sleeve. The older man leaned into it, even when he wiped at his nose. The touch was so maternal, so sweet, that he could barely take it. He couldn't stand how comforting it was. Levi ached terribly, knowing that where he was going, he wasn't going to have this sort of comfort, this warm, loving contact, for years.
"God Eren, don't leave me," he found himself saying before he could stop the words. "I mean, I know we don't have a choice, but…I'm scared."
With that, Eren pulled him close again, and Levi hid his fact against his chest. The older man, who normally covered up his fear to the best of his abilities when Eren was around, was doing nothing to hide it now. It was as if the reality of the situation had suddenly hit him, and he knew that no matter what, there was no avoiding the inevitable.
"Maybe there's a way we can escape," Eren tried. "If Mikasa bribed the guards once, maybe we can bribe them again to help us out."
"And then there will be lawmen hunting us down and catching us, and then my punishment will be even worse," Levi pointed out. "It's- I wish I didn't have to go, but I understand. I'll get it over with, and then do everything I can to make sure this never happens again. I just wish I knew what this prison was really going to be like. But from what I've heard, it's not going to be good."
"It won't kill you," Eren reassured him with a slight laugh. "You're made of strong stuff, my Doll. Now, I'll make sure to write you as often as I can, alright? I'll tell you everything that's going on here, and I want you to share your thoughts and feelings with me. If the only way I can comfort you is through my letters, then I'll do so happily. Maybe I can even send you little sketches now and then."
Levi smiled, and Eren could hear it in his voice as he said, "I'd like that very much."
Another pause, and then the boy asked a bit more cheerily, "Oh yes! Where would you like me to pick you up when you get out? I'll let you know when we get closer to the date what place I've picked out for us to go to."
"Hmm…" Levi hummed. "Ah, I've got it. My favorite place. I'll be waiting for you on the hill, how about that?"
"Of course. I should have known. Okay then, I'll meet you there, me and all of our little furry friends. Then our lives will begin, my prince."
The older man couldn't help it; he was overjoyed at the possibility, at the dream that Eren was filling his head with. He pulled out of the embrace again and without caring that Mikasa was in the room, as obviously their relationship was out in the open now, he pecked Eren's lips. But the boy wasn't about to let him leave so fast, and the minute he tried backing away, he pulled him back in for a longer, more affectionate kiss.
Mikasa, who had been watching them chat off and on from the beginning, suddenly felt the need to look away. It was certainly odd for her to see two men kissing, but even more than that, she was surprised by how much it didn't repulse her. Instead, all she saw was the deep love held between her brother and his best friend, though obviously he was much more than that to him. Most married couples weren't even this close that she had seen. She didn't even know if she felt this much affection for her own husband. And here they were, pledging to stay with each other for the rest of their lives, no official marriage contract holding them together. They were together because they wanted to be, not out of any sense of duty, or societal obligations. On the contrary, they were fighting against society, risking everything to be together. But why? Why continue to break the law when they knew it was wrong?
She sighed to herself, already knowing the answer. Because they were in love, of course. Hadn't history already taught her that? She had read Romeo and Juliet. People did crazy things when they were in love, including and not limited to, breaking the law. Sometimes the forbidden aspect of it just made it more appealing, but Mikasa knew that wasn't the case here. They just wanted to be with the one they loved without interference.
Not for the first time, she felt sorry for them, but when she saw the proof of their love in front of her eyes, it made it more real, and made her hurt even more for them.
But for the first time, she wished that they could actually be together in the way that they wanted to.
She watched as Levi once more pulled back from her brother's embrace, and said, "Could you do me a favor? Take my ring for me please. I don't want anything to happen to it in the prison. If someone stole it or I lost it, I don't know if I'd recover. But if you have it, I'll know it's safe. You can give it back to me in a couple of years."
Eren blinked at him in surprise, a little apprehensive. Take Levi's ring? But what if he needed that to look at while he was in prison to give him hope that his boy was waiting for him? Then he thought about it, and decided he was right. It would be safer if Eren had it. That way, he'd know exactly where it was and would have peace of mind. It might also give people less of a reason to come after Levi, if people ever got the chance. So, he did as he was asked, waiting until Levi bent his head slightly, before taking the delicate chain in his hands and pulling it up and off his neck. He then draped it over his own head, letting it rest to his ring with a clink. Both of them said the same thing, Once Upon a Dream, a reminder of how the first time they had met had been in each other's dreams. They were now each other's dreams come to life, someone whom they never thought they would meet. Encountering each other had been a miracle, one that they didn't take for granted.
Upon seeing the words, Eren couldn't help but start singing their song a bit, swaying in his seat with Levi, as if they were dancing. It had the desired effect, bringing a smile to Levi's face. And then of course, Levi had to join in.
But if I know you, I know what you'll do,
You'll love me at once, the way you did once
Upon a dream.
Once they repeated the stanzas a few times, they finally broke down into giggles, the two of them wiping each other's tears away. Eren grinned brightly at him, saying, "There's my happy Doll. No matter what you do, keep smiling for me, yeah? No matter how tough things get, just think of our song and smile, and it might make things a little easier."
"You two," Levi insisted. "If you ever get lonely, please don't isolate yourself further. I don't want you to go to those dark places I've seen you in. it would break my heart. Go to our favorite places, take Prince on a walk, and go to our favorite places. Keep my watch with you too, won't you? Pick it up on the way out, alright? Mikasa should be able to. They had me fill out some forms before court today, and they wanted me to name my next of kin, just in case, so I named her. It's by sheer luck that we look a bit alike and have the same surname. So don't worry, you'll be kept up to date about my business."
Eren was a bit surprised that he had been allowed to do that, considering he himself was Levi's supposed "victim" and Mikasa was his sister. But perhaps he had been able to pull it off because it was a well-known fact that Mikasa had been adopted. For all they knew, maybe she and Levi were blood relatives and they just didn't know it. It didn't matter, he supposed, so long as they bought it.
However, just as the mood lightened, they heard a large thud, followed by some ominous footsteps. Mikasa straightened up, looking as alert as a deer that heard the click of a hunter's rifle. She craned her head, pressing her nose against the glass, before she frantically said, "Eren, we have to go. The transporters are on their way."
Eren and Levi grew rigid, looking at each other with desperate expressions, tears filling their eyes anew. No, this couldn't be happening, they needed more time! But there would never be enough time, would there? Not even if they escaped and ran away and each lived to be one hundred, spending all that time together, there wouldn't be enough time. Shuddering with fear, Eren lunged forward and gripped Levi tightly, and Levi hid his face in his shoulder again with a sob.
"Eren…" Levi cried, "Eren, Eren!"
"I'm here," Eren sobbed, "Shhh, please don't- don't cry. It's not forever. It's not forever, love. We'll be together again soon. We're strong, we can do this."
He wasn't sure if he was trying to convince Levi or himself in saying that. Truthfully, he didn't know how he was going to make it through Levi's absence either. Already, he could feel his depressive thoughts creeping in, and they terrified him.
Levi dearly wished he could hug Eren back. He struggled against his bonds in a vain hope that he might break free, but of course they held firm. There was no getting free. "Eren please…my Aurora, I love you so much. That will never change, no matter how long we're apart. You told me to smile. Well I want you to smile too. Go out and feel the sun on your face, live freely for me while I'm not there. Sing our song when you miss me, and write me as often as you can. Take care of Prince for me, and…I love you, I can't say that enough. I'll meet you in our special place in two years, and I can't wait to see our new house and start our life together."
Something inside Eren broke afresh; for some reason, it sounded like their wedding vows again, and in this atmosphere, it just hurt all the more. He heard Mikasa hissing his name again, but he ignored her. Instead, he took Levi's face in his hands, and replied to his lover, "Of course. I'll be waiting for you. I'll keep your things safe too. And whenever you become discouraged, or lose hope, just think of me and Prince waiting for you on the hill on a summer day, the grass and sky all golden like it was the first time we made love, yeah? Never lose hope, and I won't either. Like we promised each other at the altar, I'll be loyal and love you first, until the day we move onto the next world."
Right before Mikasa grabbed him, he managed to kiss Levi again, tears streaming down their faces, Eren trying half-heartedly to keep his grip on Levi, but he was no match for his stronger sister. They were ripped away from each other, sobbing and with the other's person's name on their lips. Levi leaned as far forward on the bench as he could without getting up, hands still shackled behind his back, face pinched in pain and tears streaming down his cheeks, before Eren was dragged out of the room and the door was shut, cutting off his view of him.
Mikasa quickly pulled Eren out of sight, down the hall and around a corner. She had to keep a hand on him so that he wouldn't charge back down there and punch someone out. As more guards approached and entered the room they were just in, it looked like he dearly wanted to. When they pulled Levi out of the room, each of them holding one arm and keeping him between them, that urge increased tenfold. They were taking him away from him and he was just sitting here doing nothing. It was torturous.
The minute they were gone, Mikasa let him go, and Eren ran back down the hall and into the room, now empty. There was a window on the wall, right above the bench Levi had been sitting on, which cast sunlight onto the white floor. There were bars on the window as well, but Eren paid them no mind as he hopped up on the bench, kneeling on it, and pushing his face between them. Right outside the window, the carriage that would take Levi away was parked.
He watched, powerless, as Levi soon appeared and was helped up into the carriage. The doors were shut behind him with a clang that even Eren could hear from where he was. It looked pitch black inside the carriage, but at least there were a couple of barred windows for ventilation. Just before the carriage could leave, however, Levi's face appeared in those little windows, his eyes darting back and forth, as if he was looking for something.
Then, they saw the window Eren was looking through, and the boy knew immediately what he had been looking for.
His heart lodged itself in his throat when he saw his love mouthing something that Eren recognized as his name. He mouthed Levi's name back, reaching for him pathetically, his hand hitting the glass. Still, he grasped for him, as he could open the door of the carriage and pull him out. But of course, that was impossible, and all he could was watch Levi's tear filled eyes grow further and further away as the carriage finally began to pull away from the curb. Eventually he disappeared from Eren's sight, and that was when he broke down. He knelt down on the floor, right in the patch of sunlight, face in his hands.
That was when Mikasa, who had been standing outside the door before, stepped in, kneeling down beside him and placing a hand on his shoulder. She kept silent though, staying there as quiet support.
There was nothing she could say, after all.
000
Levi rode in silence in the carriage, sitting down on one of the benches inside once Eren had disappeared from his sight. Now that he couldn't see him anymore, he felt horribly nervous and vulnerable. The worst part, besides that, was just not knowing. Prison was going to be much different than just being in holding, much worse, he imagined. He just wanted to get this done and over with, he decided. The sooner he went in and started his sentence, the sooner he could get out.
He wrung his hands the whole way, seeing Eren's tearful face as he left the room and through the window when he had looked out the carriage. This was all his doing. He was the reason for Eren's tears, and though he said he didn't blame him, he still felt that he needed to earn his forgiveness. That would be the first thing he would do when he saw Eren again was to tell him how sorry he was. He knew he would tell him again over and over that it wasn't his fault, but still.
All too soon, it felt like the carriage was slowing down, and when he looked out the window again, he saw that they were still in town. However, he didn't really recognize where they were. On one side was the city, and on the other was a looming building that from what he could see, terrified the daylights of him. But maybe he was just overreacting. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad when he saw it up close.
Oh no. When the doors were opened and he was helped by transporters out of the carriage, he saw that the prison was far, far worse than he could have ever imagined.
This had to be a joke. He had heard whispers of this place being referred to as Dracula's castle, but he had thought those people were just exaggerating. But now he could see that it was very appropriate. The place was huge, taking up more than a few city blocks, surrounded by huge brick walls. It must have been inspired by medieval architecture, because it reminded him of an evil castle. The castle of the villain of a fairytale, perhaps. It was grey and somber, and the sunshine that was currently shining down on them did absolutely nothing to help improve the image of the place. He had also heard that this place was built to be intimidating on purpose, so that just the sight of the prison would be enough to deter crime, and he had to be honest, mission accomplished. He was about to wet his pants just at the thought of going inside.
The transporters, once again each of them holding one of his elbows, pulled him forward, leaving him no choice. He dug in his heels for just a moment, but of course it didn't matter. His heart beat so loud he was sure everyone could hear it, and kept beating hard even when they through the iron gates. Once the gates shut behind them with a foreboding clang and they were safely inside, they let go of him, allowing him to walk freely between them. With wide eyes, he looked around everywhere. There were still large, grey walls surrounding them, with deep ditches in front of each wall to prevent escape. Not that he had planned on it, but it was still disconcerting to see.
"Come on Mr. Ackerman," the transporters said gruffly. "You'll have plenty of time to marvel at the architecture when you get inside."
His last thought before being pushed through the sorting gate was wondering whether or not, in spite of his short sentence, he would ever see the light of day, or his beloved, again.
