Bakugou woke up to his phone ringing non stop, and Midoriya's announcing " A phone call is here " in All Might's voice at full volume. "What the hell?" he grumbled. He was so comfortable with Midoriya laying half on him and half on the couch, he didn't want to move. Running his fingers through messy green hair, he looked down where Midoriya was snoring… and drooling all over his shirt. "Damn nerd."
Their phones continued to go off and Midoriya smacked his mouth, lifting his head. "What's going on?"
"Hell if I know," he said, lifting his arms to stretch as Midoriya rubbed his face in his chest. "You drooled all over me!"
"Whatever, you like it," Midoriya grumbled. "What time is it?"
"No fucking clue," Bakugou said, grabbing his phone. "Shit… eleven missed calls from Leadie."
"I have four missed calls from Naomasa," Midoriya mumbled.
"Naomasa?!" Bakugou yelped. "Is All Might ok?!"
"I don't know!" Midoriya sat up, and hit the redial button to call Naomasa back. They had just seen All Might the other day, and Naomasa would never call his phone unless it was an emergency. But knowing how close All Might and Naomasa were…
Bakugou put his phone in his pocket and listened as Midoriya hummed and then let out a relieved sigh.
"What is it?!" Bakugou hissed, only to have Midoriya put his hand in his face and push him away.
"WHAT?!" Midoriya cried, jumping up. Bakugou just stared at him. What the hell was going on? Midoriya paced around the room, humming and listening. "Alright, we're on our way."
"What the fuck is going on?" Bakugou asked.
"C'mon," Midoriya said, "Our parents are in big trouble."
What the fuck happened?
Leadie just stood in the kitchen as the three parents snored loudly. Inko hiccuped and hugged a bottle close to her chest, as Mitsuki drooled all over Masaru.
"The kid's parents are wanting to press charges," Naomasa said. He had just gotten off the phone with Izuku.
"Rightfully so!" Leadie grumbled. "And who sold the kid the wine?"
"It was a convenience store on the corner. Apparently the owner was reading a porn magazine and didn't even look at the kid when he was buying it," Naomasa said.
Leadie groaned and shook her head. Why the hell was Katsuki not picking up his phone?! Calling his line once more, Izuku picked up.
"About time someone picked up!" she hissed.
"We're on the way," Izuku said.
"Hurry up."
The parents groaned and opened their eyes. She saw Inko wipe the drool from her mouth then start smacking at Mitsuki and Masaru. "Guys… wake up," she groaned, then grabbed her head.
Bakugou went storming into his parent's flat. What the fuck were they even thinking?! Midoriya had filled him in on the way over there. Once they got there, he saw his mother and Inko at the kitchen table holding their heads and groaning, while his father was sick in the bathroom.
"Naomasa is talking to the parents," Leadie said, wrapping her arm around Midoriya and hugging him. "I'm so sorry you have to see your parents like this."
Bakugou shook his head. Fucking hell. Leadie would always baby Midoriya. Stomping over to the table, Bakugou glared at his mother. "What are you? Some fucking lush now?" he growled.
"Fuck off, you little pervert!" she groaned, letting her head fall to the table.
"No! Now you listen to me, you old hag!" he hissed, and Inko groaned as she held her head. "This shit has gotten out of hand! Ok, so what? You walked in on me and Deku! Do you know how many times as a kid I walked in on you and dad?! More than any kid should!"
"You had a video too!" Inko whined.
Bakugou shook his head. "Why the hell are you on porn sites anyway?!"
"It was your father!" his mother groaned.
Bakugou stood up and heard dry heaving in the bathroom. "But dad isn't a pervert like you!"
"Kacchan!" Midoriya said, coming over and taking his hand. "Maybe we shouldn't talk about these things…"
"It might trigger them some more," Leadie said.
"Fucking great! Our parents are triggered over a married couple having sex!" he growled, and moved to the living room, flopping on the couch. Calling out over his shoulder. "Yeah mom! I remember coming home from school early in middle school only to see Pops have you bent over this couch! Yet I turned out just fucking fine!"
Inko and Mitsuki started crying again.
"...Kacchan," Midoriya groaned.
Naomasa came back into the apartment and smiled. "I think we have a resolution!"
"Yeah… send these lushes to a fucking meeting," he growled.
"Well yes," Naomasa said. "They will need to sober up, and stay sober for a bit."
"What?! Nooooo" Inko and Mitsuki whined.
"So what is going on?" Leadie asked.
"The parents said if Ground Zero and Deku would come autograph a bunch of things their son had… they would not press charges," Naomasa said.
Leadie laughed and reached into her bag. "I've got some promotional pictures here of them. They can sign those. I'll send over some of their merchandise as well."
"You're lucky they're huge fans of the Wonder Duo. We really don't want word of this getting out to the press," Naomasa said.
"Katsuki!" Leadie hissed. "You better charm the fuck out of this family!"
Bakugou groaned. "Fucking great."
Monoma had seen the text, and he had been avoiding Draganeire. He needed to come clean and break things off with Kimim. He was glad Leadie hadn't been on his ass recently about all of this- because he was just not ready.
He knew she had a lot to handle with the Wonder Duo, which made putting off dealing with all of this easier. The more he put it off though, the worse the weight of it all got.
Coming clean about all of this would be hard. He knew people would be hurt and upset at him- but what else was new?
Taking a deep breath, he watched as his phone rang (his other phone, the burner he had gotten that only Draganeire called).
He had stood Draganeire up, and was waiting for Kimim to come over. He figured if Leadie wasn't breathing down his neck he could just relax for a moment. Hearing a soft knock on the door, he turned off his other phone, setting it in a drawer and went to answer the door.
It was a shame, as Kimim was a really nice guy- with an amazing quirk.
"Ok, Kacchan! Make sure you smile," Midoriya said, holding his hand as they walked down the hallway. Knocking on the door, they were met with a woman who smiled at them with hearts in her eyes.
"Ohmygod you're here!" she squealed, as a man and a kid came running. "I didn't think it would be so fast!"
"And they're wearing their hero uniforms!" the kid squealed.
They had passed out in their uniforms after their patrol, and when the phone calls had come in, they never had a chance to change- this worked out for them.
"Ah! It's so great to meet a big fan! We brought you some pictures that we signed," Midoriya said. "And we will be sending over more of our merch in the next week!"
"Oh fantastic!" she said. "Please come in and I'll make some tea!"
The table was completely covered in merchandise, and Bakugou groaned.
"Daddy look! It is Deku and Ground Zero!" the kid kept yelling, bouncing around.
"It sure is son! And they are going to sign all your stuff for you!" the father said.
"I put some things on the table, but his bedroom is where most of it is," the mother said.
"All his merch-"
"Yeah!" the mother said. "Also, if you could sign his furniture and clothing too, that would be awesome! Should be easy enough."
Bakugou looked over at Midoriya who was still smiling as he accepted his cup of tea.
"And once you're done, we will have the rest of the stuff on the table for you!" she chirped.
Oh what glory hell was this?
To say Inko's head hurt was an understatement. She had been successfully avoiding hangovers lately by just not stopping drinking. Maybe not the best remedy, but it worked for her. Groaning, she sipped the coffee Leadie had put in front of her and clutched her rolling stomach.
She did need to get over this- she had to. She had been drinking too much for far too long.
Naomasa was on his phone, and Leadie was pacing around their kitchen before sitting down and punching away at her phone.
"You three need to be sober for one week, minimum" Leadie said. "I will have Naomasa check in on you. The first signs of alcohol and all three of you are in meetings and rehab!"
Inko shivered. Naomasa had hung up his phone and was collecting the empty bottles on the floor, and throwing them in the trash. Each clang of the bottles radiated in her head, making her groan.
"Also, you will thank your sons for keeping this out of the papers," Leadie said. "One word of this gets out and you are all royally fucked! And I've worked too hard on those boys for their parents to disgrace them this way!"
Naomasa started to pour wine and vodka down the drain. Mitsuki groaned and whined as she saw the alcohol being thrown out.
"Gah! Open a window in here!" Leadie hissed, getting up and opening a window in the kitchen. "Smells like the drunk tank at the police station!"
"That it does," Naomasa agreed.
Masaru came out of the bathroom looking green, and groaned as he made his way to the living room. It was a shame that such a gentle man was wrapped up in all of this.
"Now you three get your shit together!" Leadie hissed. "I'm going home. I have enough on my plate when it comes to your sons. Never thought I'd have to deal with their parents too!"
"Yeah, I'm going to get Inko home and then call it a night," Naomasa added.
Inko groaned as she felt the shame wash over her. It was so hard having a son who was so famous now. She had to find a better way to cope with it all. Even in her state, seeing him today had made her heart happy. She hoped he wasn't too upset with her.
"I'll come by for lunch tomorrow," Inko said.
Mitsuki nodded her head and laid it back on the table. Standing up, Inko's legs wobbled a bit as Naomasa helped steady her. "You're just a block away, right?" he asked.
She nodded.
"I'll let Izuku know I'm taking you home," Naomasa said, punching out a text on his phone.
Inko's head hurt so fucking bad.
They had been there six fucking hours and Bakugou's hands were cramping up so badly. He had gone through eight sharpie markers and the mother kept finding more things for them to sign.
They spent an hour doing photos and just when he thought it was all done...
"Oh! Do you think the Wonder Duo would cook us a meal?!" the kid chirped.
"Kid! It is three in the fu- ACK!" Bakugou growled, rubbing his side where Midoriya had just elbowed the hell out of him.
"Sure, anything for our biggest fan! What would you like?" Midoriya asked.
And that's how Bakugou found himself wearing a frilly apron as he made grilled cheese sandwiches at three in the fucking morning. They were still posing as they cooked, the mother continuing to snap pictures. This was going above and beyond.
They had signed every fucking thing down to the canned goods in the house. Somehow Midoriya never stopped smiling at him and the family. When they finally got out of there and walked home, the sun was starting to rise- and damn if Midoriya wasn't still smiling.
"What's gotten into you, nerd?" he asked.
Midoriya just smiled at him. "Oh nothing, just thinking about how our parents were traumatized over seeing us. Again!"
Bakugou squinted at him. "Thank fuck we don't have to go in today."
Midoriya agreed and leaned into him as he wrapped his arm around his shoulders. Flexing his fingers, he groaned. "This must be how Leadie feels," he grumbled.
Midoriya took his hand and kissed his fingers. "Probably."
"Did we really have to sign that much shit?"
Stopping where they stood on the corner, Midoriya turned and faced him, running his hand down his cheek and smiling at him. The soft glow of the sun rising behind him made him look like an angel.
"I love you," Midoriya whispered, kissing him gently.
He hummed against Midoriya's lips, wrapping his arms tight around him and lifting him off the ground. Midoriya giggled and he spun him around a bit. "Wanna grab some bagels?" he asked.
"I'd love to!" Midoriya chirped, smiling up at him. Damn that smile so bright, and fuck if he did not love it.
'C'mon nerd," he said.
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Midoriya sat at a table in the small cafe they had stopped at as Bakugou barked their order at the girl behind the counter. He smiled to himself as he looked over at the man he loved, those words from last night ringing in his head.
Kacchan loved him!
He had been all smiles- even with everything going on with his parents.
When Bakugou had picked him up and kissed him, he really thought he would hear those words again from him- but he didn't need to, he saw it in his eyes.
Bakugou never had to say those words out loud- his actions showed it, in everything he did. Midoriya realized this, and even if he only ever heard those words once, it was enough.
As Bakugou came over with their coffee and bagels, Midoriya was still all smiles.
"Got you that damn sweet shit coffee you fucking like," Bakugou grumbled, sitting down and passing the cup to him.
It was stuff like this that showed him Bakugou loved him.
"The fuck you smiling about?" Bakugou asked, "It is just damn coffee and bagels!"
Midoriya giggled and took the bagel, smiling as he bit into it. He thought he would never stop smiling.
"I'm married to a fucking weirdo," Bakugou grumbled.
Hello and Good Morning Tokyo! I am Gossip VonSnoopster here with your latest Hero Gossip podcast!
Last night seen out and about in the club scene, Kaminari and Ashido showed an entire club a new dance style! From what I was told, they really brought down the house! A little birdy told me Jiro was DJing and even sang them a quick little tune! Talk about a night!
But a more important issue is this photo of the Wonder Duo circulating all over Instagram and Twitter! Did you see it?
I am thinking this photo is staged, though others are arguing it is not! An anonymous reader posted the picture of our favorite duo, with Ground Zero holding Deku off the ground as they kiss so sweetly, the sun rising in the background. No way this photo could be anything but a PR photo op!
Now don't get me wrong! I've always been the biggest Deku fan, as our Sweetheart deserves all the happiness in the world- but this picture is completely staged!
We get it guys! The marriage is REAL! Ha ha ha! Like there was ever any doubt! Knowing how Deku is, he would never just jump into anything without a complete plan and run down of it! Whoever doubted this, I am sure you are feeling quite the fool now!
Also! Who saw all this crazy autographed merch that has landed on Ebay?! This can't all be real! Out of nowhere all this weird stuff signed by our Wonder Duo?! But you better believe I am bidding on a can of corn that Deku signed! Call it a hoax or not, but seriously, how many people can say they own this? Hopefully I can soon! The auction ends in three days!
And onto other heroes! Did you all hear how Iida has-
The podcast continues…
