The flesh and the fantasies...
After looking into his memories, I could see that me and Granger were in fact in love.
I wish I could remember everything myself instead of just feelings and flashes or looking at someone else's memories of the events that occurred. Why would she do this? I mean she must have known that I would have never agreed to her erasing our love just like that?! Especially after having to hide it away for so long, as we undoubtedly would have had to do.
Before I would get more angry, I decided that I needed to speak to her first. I was gonna go to sleep right now and come tomorrow I would find a way to get her alone.
I went to sleep, but it was as restless as I was myself. My dreams were haunted by flashbacks and memories from events between Granger and me from the entire past year.
"Flashback-Dream"
Our first kind-of-friendly encounter on the train… What she said to me then and how it changed everything…
Glances in the hallways that were getting more friendly and even flirty as time went on…
Talks with each other, in the shadows, when no one could see us…
My opinion slowly changing about her, but I suppose that had already started when I first met her and she proceeded to prove all of my father's accusations about muggleborns, completely wrong, day after day…
Our study sessions and late night encounters in the room of requirement…
Kissing and touching so gently and intimately…like lovers…
Intense feelings developing on both sides…
The night that it became more then than just small kisses, soft touches and fleeting glances… the night we became an us… when we first made love…
Continuing our little meetings and making love to each other every time…
Telling her about my mission…about the dark mark that was going to be on my skin when she saw me again after the holidays…
Her helping me fix the cabinet, but at the same time thinking of a way to get out of killing Dumbledore…
Snape being the one to kill Dumbledore in the end and me joining the Order as a double agent, together with Snape…
Going back to the deatheathers to keep Hermione safe… Walking away from her, hearing her cries behind me and not being able to stop the tears rolling from my eyes at the same time…
The school being destroyed and Hermione on the run with Potter and Weasley… Going on the run myself after being exposed by the deatheaters…
Months trying to find her… Fearing she had been killed…
Then suddenly everything going blank…
"End Flashback-Dream"
Suddenly I shot wide awake, remembering everything… I seriously needed to talk to her as soon as possible…
