{Viola}
I've come to realize that, in agreeing to marry Todd, I've signed up for a lifetime of explanations.
"I don't get the point of this." Todd says, looking over my shoulder at the pros and cons list I've been writing. "Writin down all the good reasons and all the bad reasons ain't gonna help yer decide wut to do about yer Noise. It's just gonna confuse yer more."
I turn around in my stool to face Todd, who's got a paintbrush in one hand and a bucket of paint in the other. We're in one of the houses that he'd helped build over the last few weeks. It wasn't ours - we still hadn't grown out of sleeping in a tent and in a shared cot – so for now we were just decorating the homes for other people. It was our job to make sure they were taken care of first, after all.
But admittedly, we were pretty distracted right now.
We still hadn't figured out what to do about my Noise.
"The point is to make the decision easier." I tell him, holding up the list. "Whichever column has the best reasons is what I'll choose."
Todd hinges forward, squints his eyes at the list. "Well, looks like yer choosin not to do anything about it. You haven't even written anything on the 'good' side."
I tear the page away from his eyes to look at it myself, even though I already knew what was written down, considering that I was the one who wrote it.
"I was getting to that." I lie – other than being curious, I really didn't have any good reasons.
"Mhm." Todd says, putting the paint brush and bucket onto the wooden floor that is covered in tarp.
"Look, Viola. I kno you wanna kno, but we don't need to kno. You kno?"
"What?" I say, followed by two confused laughs. "I don't know what you just said, Todd."
"You do kno-"
"We should stop saying know."
Todd senses irritation in my Noise, but it only makes him smile, wanting to tease me more.
"No, we shouldn't."
"Todd." I say pointedly, but can't help smiling. "You just said it again."
"I didn't." He shrugs, trying to play it off. "I said 'no' not 'kno.' There's a difference."
"Not in the way they sound!"
"I don't kno wut you mean-"
"Todd Hewitt!" I shout, getting out of my stool and playfully grabbing onto his wrists. "If you don't stop saying that word I'm going to-"
"Yer gonna wut?" He challenges, fully grinning now.
I look to the bucket of paint on the floor, quickly snagging the brush and dipping it into the paint. I hold it out in front of me as if it were a weapon – threatening to use it against him.
"Or I'll splatter you with paint." I say, raising a suggestive eyebrow.
But Todd isn't fazed by my threat, just crosses his arms, grinning in the slightest.
"No you won't."
When he says it again, I fling the brush in his direction, white paint flying off the bristles and splattering onto Todd's clothes. He laughs loudly and I let out a shriek, watching as Todd runs towards the bucket, dips his hands inside, and chases after me.
"Todd! Stop!" I shout through a series of shrieks and laughs as he chases me throughout the kitchen.
"Yer started it!" he says, laughing along with me.
Todd chases me around the table, and when I turn to see how close he's gotten, he extends his fingers and flings paint onto my face. I shriek before running through the doorway that led out of the kitchen, and into a hallway that's only lit by the setting sun that shines through the window in the foyer. I clamor down the hallway, but Todd is faster, wrapping his arms around me from behind before smearing the paint all over my face.
"Todd! You ruddy got it all over my clothes." I shout, turning around and playfully shoving him in the chest.
"Yer asked for it." He says, paint marks on his smiling face, too.
"And we got it all over the floor!" I say, pointing to the floor that isn't covered in tarp. "And this isn't even going to be our house."
"It could be." Todd says. "Ain't nobody claimed it yet. And we don't need anything big or fancy – this wud be perfect."
I purse my lips, cross my arms. "Are you asking me to move in with you, Todd Hewitt?"
His eyes turn soft before he reaches for my cheek. "Well were yer gonna say no? Cuz that wud be weird, considerin that we're engaged-"
But instead of letting him finish, I lean forward and quickly peck him on the lips, smiling as I pull back. "It's ours, then."
Todd and I both share a feeling of happiness in our Noise – we'd gone from running through the woods, sleeping in cots, being stuck on scout ships, to having a house. Together. It was almost unbelievable, but we didn't waste any time dwelling on it. It had gotten easier and easier to believe this was our new life, that this was what normal felt like.
Todd runs his thumb across my cheek, leaning in to kiss me again, when we're startled by someone walking through the front door.
Todd? Viola?
It was Ben, looking for us.
Todd's Noise rattles with excitement – he still hadn't spoken to his father after the proposal. He grabs my hand before near sprinting back to the living room, where Ben stood with happiness and congratulations and pride swirling through his Noise.
Well look who it is! He says through his Noise, a huge smile on his face. He pulls both me and Todd in for a hug, squeezing us tight.
"Where have yer been?" Todd says when he pulls away, all smiles but still concerned.
Oh, you know. Just busy with the settlers. He says, shrugging. Congratulations, you two!
"Thanks." Me and Todd both say in unison.
He's a handful, Viola. I hope you're ready for that.
"Oh, I know." I scoff, placing a hand on Todd's shoulder. "But so am I – and we still seemed to of made it work."
Speaking of made it work. Ben says, his eyes roaming the walls that have yet to be painted. Have you two actually done anything in here?
Todd and I look to each other with panicked expressions – even though we'd basically claimed the house for ourselves, we still didn't get any real work done today. I was too preoccupied with figuring out what to do with my Noise, and Todd was too preoccupied with watching me figuring out what to do with my Noise – so all we ended up doing was make the Noise situation even more confusing and getting paint all over the floor.
There's no use in us withholding the truth, because Ben can read it all in Todd's Noise, but he doesn't seem frustrated with us.
It's okay. You two have been through a lot, you deserve a break. Ben says.
"We'll do better tomorrow." Todd says, guilt filling his Noise.
"We will." I'm quick to agree. "Todd and I have a lot to celebrate but we're still dedicated to building a new community."
It's no problem, really. Ben reassures us. The community is actually doing really well – everyone is getting along, even with the Spackle. So you two should take some of the burden off. Things are going to be… okay.
And it's the first time someone says those words and I actually believe them.
"So me and Viola are gonna be livin here now." Todd says randomly, earning a smile from Ben.
Todd- He starts, sounding so proud of his son. He's at a loss for words, but we both know how he feels, images of Todd growing up with Ben and Cillian swirling around in his Noise. They both start to tear up, father and son, and I feel like it's a moment that I should let them share together, alone, until Todd reaches for my hand.
"He woulda loved you, Viola." Todd says, his eyes brimmed with tears though a smile is on his face. "Probably more than the two of us."
Ben laughed, I almost agree with you there, son.
"I think I would have, too." I tell them, before a thought occurs to me. "You two should sit me down sometime soon tell me all about him. All about life before – all of this."
Well we've got plenty of time to catch you up. Ben nods.
"We shud tonite." Todd says – excitement in his Noise. "We cud bring everyone over, as a matter of fact."
"You're starting to get out of hand with arranging hang outs, Todd." I say, laughing, and earn a pointed look from Todd.
You two don't have to do that. Ben says. The Spackle are actually having a festival tonight – to celebrate finishing the community. They'd like for us all to be there.
Todd and I look to each other, unable to hide the smiles on our faces and the happiness in our Noise.
"We'll be there, then." I say. "Should we bring anything?"
Ben shrugs. Just yourselves. And energy to party, of course. I've heard the Spackle will keep you on your feet.
Todd lets out a single laugh, lacking the humor. "Wut do yer mean? Like dancin?"
I sense the fear in his Noise and look at him with a raised eyebrow. "What, you don't like to dance?"
Todd's face is blank, but Ben quickly answeres for him. Well, he can. But he isn't-
"That's enough, Ben." Todd says, warning in his tone. But I can already see the memoires coming up in his Noise when he was a child, dancing horribly offbeat with Ben and Cillian, tripping over his own two feet. He notices me noticing and quickly tries to cover his Noise, and I try my hardest to keep my laughs in with puffed cheeks.
But it doesn't work.
"Real nice, Viola." He says as I bend over in laughter, clutching my stomach. "I hope yer got a good look because that's all the dancin yer gonna get from me."
"What? No!" I say after hearing his threat, quickly standing up to meet his gaze. "You can't not dance, Todd."
"Yes I can." He says, a matter of fact. "Yer just gonna laugh at me the whole time."
"So?" I say, shrugging as if it's nothing. "We make fun of each other all the time!"
But Todd doesn't change his mind, crossing his arms with a blank look on his face.
"Okay, fine. I won't laugh. See." I say, rearranging my expression to be as blank as Todd's. But after a few seconds that same image of him dancing as a kid pops into my mind, and Ben's amused face that I can see out of the corner of my eye doesn't help, either. I bite the inside of my lip to keep my composure –
But again, it doesn't work.
A laugh escapes from his lips.
"Viola!" He complains. "You laughed again!"
"I can't help it!" I say.
You can't blame her, Todd. Ben interjects. It is pretty funny.
"I'm not doin it." Todd says, a matter of fact.
My shoulders drop and my head tilts to the side before giving Todd a disappointed look. But I don't press the issue further – Todd will most likely come to his senses once he's surrounded by all of his friends and family and the community. Even Todd, who supposedly has two left feet, won't be able to give up the opportunity to celebrate how far we've all come.
Well, regardless if you dance or not, I know you'll be there. Everything is going to start just before sundown.
"Sounds good." I say, giving Ben a smile. "Want to stick around until then? We could use some help cleaning up, since somebody insisted on chasing me around with a dripping wet paintbrush-"
Todd narrowed his eyes at me playfully. "Yer the one who started that –"
As much as I'd like to. Ben interrupts, sensing the oncoming argument. I told Hildy and Jane that I'd help them set up for later.
"No worries." Todd says, and I nod in understanding.
"We've got all the time in the world, now." I say. "Let me walk you out Ben. And Todd-" I say, giving him a pointed look before gesturing towards the messy floor. "Clean up your mess."
Todd smiles at me before poking me in the side, and I swat his hand away playfully before following Ben out of the living room and to the front door.
So I'll see you two soon, then? Ben said, opening the door to let in the cool breeze from outside.
"You will." I say, but peer over my shoulder before asking Ben the question I'd been hiding in my Noise. "Hey, Ben? Can I ask you something?"
He furrows his eyebrows, closes the door just slightly. Is it about your Noise?
I bite the inside of my lip before nodding guiltily. "I know you said you didn't know much about it – but someone brought it to my attention yesterday. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since. And Todd…"
Don't worry about him, Viola. Ben says. He's just worried about what you'll find – but if you really want to know, he'll support you.
I consider Ben's point before nodding, though he doesn't let me respond.
Who exactly told you that it was important to figure out the origin of your Noise? He asks, though I can see in his Noise he already knows who.
"Mona." I admit, annoyed just by saying her name. "She's already stopped Todd and I two times about my Noise, and out of those two times she was ruddy watching us sleep. And she was taking notes, Ben!"
He gives me a reassuring look. I'm not surprised by that – a lot of settlers have complained about her being sort of…
"Crazy?" I finish for him.
That's a variation of what I've heard, yes. Ben says. She's just really interested in our planet, and even though she's a little pushy -
"Completely overbearing." I say. "And Todd… he doesn't like her at all – and rightfully so. But honestly, Ben, I can't deny that I am a little curious about my Noise. I mean, I'm the only girl on New World to have it… and only Todd can read it. At first I thought it was great, because it helped us a lot in the war. But now that it's all over…"
My voice trails off as I try to convey my feelings to Ben. It isn't that I dislike having Noise – I actually love it more than anything, especially being connected to Todd's. But not knowing where it came from, and especially not knowing if it would ever get stronger, more powerful, more accessible to the rest of the world –
It still made me wonder.
I can't say that it isn't a little… confusing. Ben says. But we've always said that, if men can get rid of Noise, it shouldn't be impossible for women to also get it.
"So… do you think other women can get Noise?" I say, hopeful that the answer is yes.
Hopeful that I won't always have to be the only one.
I think so, yes. Ben says. But I don't want to give you false information and ruin your hopes of finding out the truth. Why don't you speak to the Spackle about it tonight? Even with all of my training, they know much more about it than I do.
I give Ben a small smile – both relieved the conversation is almost over, though disappointed that I still didn't have an exact answer.
"Of course I will. Thanks, Ben." I say, giving him a smile.
Anytime. He tells me, patting my shoulder. Also, try to keep Todd in the loop about it. Trust me – he'll be on board with whatever you decide.
I give Ben a hug before he turns and leaves, then let out a sigh once I'm alone in the foyer. Would it be a good idea to bring up all of this Noise stuff at the festival? For the first time in a long time we finally have peace, and I'm not so sure that now is the best time to create a new problem to solve –
But this was something I had to do –
Something I wanted to do –
For me.
For the first time, in a long time –
I ruddy wanted to do something for me.
"Viola." Todd's voice interrupted my thoughts. I whip around to see him at the end of the hallway.
"Hmm?" is all I can manage as a response.
"So I cleaned up your mess." He says, walking down the hall with a towel in hand. "But next time, it's gonna be on you-"
"Hey, Todd." I say once he's in front of me. "Can I ask you something?"
His eyebrows furrow in confusion, reading the anticipation in my Noise. "Anything, Viola. Wut's wrong?"
"Nothing's wrong." I say, swallowing the lump in my throat. "I just… so I just asked Ben about my Noise, and he said I should talk to the Spackle about it. About… how I may have gotten it. Do you… are you okay with me doing that?"
Todd's expression goes from concerned to relieved, as his face relaxes, his shoulders loosen up. He takes my hands in his before responding, "Viola… you don't have to ask me to do that. It's yer choice."
"Yeah." I start to counter. "But I know you weren't too excited about the idea before –"
"That was only cuz I didn't want Mona botherin yer, or gettin in yer head." Todd says quickly. "I mean, I'm no scientist or researcher or whatever she is… but I don't think there's any harm in yer havin Noise."
I nodded before offering him a small smile. "I don't think there is either, Todd. But the fact that I'm the only girl with Noise… that you're the only one who can hear it? I mean.. it's… amazing. But I can't deny that I really, really, want to know how it's even possible."
Todd's Noise grows with warmth and acceptance before he smiles. "So let's figure it out, then. Together."
"Great." I say, my Noise full of excitement. "We'll say hi to a few people once we get to the festival – and then we'll find the Spackle."
…
But Todd and I quickly forget about our plan to find the Spackle and learn about my Noise as soon as we get to the festival. It was already dark once we'd made it to the center of town, a large bonfire lighting up against the night sky, with human settlers and Spackle all chatting and dancing and laughing with one another around it. Steff and Lee immediately ran up to us, wrapping me and Todd in warm hugs before we get into a full on conversation – laughing and joking with one another. Music also played in the background, as Spackle and a few of the settlers played on handmade instruments, and I danced around Todd, trying my best to get him to join me even though he wouldn't budge. I knew that I looked silly – I hadn't danced in what felt like years, but I couldn't help it.
"Viola, I'm not gonna do it!" Todd says, smiling as I grab onto his wrists and twist him from side to side.
"So you're just gonna make me dance all by myself?" I say, still tugging on his arms.
Todd laughs, puffs of white air escaping from his lips. "Yes, I am."
I stop mid dance, let his arms drop to his side, before gaping my mouth open in surprise.
"Fine. I'll just dance with Steff and Lee, then."
I hop over to the middle where Steff and Lee dance with one another, and we dance and laugh in sync before I turn to face Todd. I wiggle my eyebrows, a silent invitation for him to come join us, but he only shakes his head. Steff and Lee soon join my plea by chanting Todd's name, and soon I can read embarrassment in his Noise to match the blush that's coming up on his cheeks. But he still doesn't budge, shaking his head no, and I can't say that I didn't expect it. Living in a safer world doesn't change who Todd is – he wouldn't have danced voluntarily regardless. I give him one last look before Bradley and 1017 walk up to greet him with welcoming hugs – instantly reminding me of my Noise – but still something keeps me from going over. Right now my Noise is bursting with happiness, being in the company of my best friends, dancing in the middle of a area that was once a battle ground. I figure that I could always find 1017 later on in the night, confront him with my questions about my Noise then, but as soon as I turn my back to their group, shutting my eyes and swaying to the music, I hear 1017 pose the question to Todd himself.
Has she figured out the origin of her Noise, yet? 1017 asks Todd.
No, she hasn't. But she wants to. Todd says, his gaze falling back to me.
"Do you think that's what's best for her, right now?" Bradley asks, concern in his voice. "We aren't even two months out of the war, I don't want to bombard her with more troubles –"
She really wants to, Bradley. Todd defends. We just don't kno who to go to.
Well, she's all the rage amongst the elder Spackle community. 1017 informs. From what I've heard, this isn't the first time a woman has had Noise on this planet. They say that it's rare, but possible.
Are yer sayin that's who we need to go to? Todd asks.
It's probably the closest thing you'll get to an answer. 1017 says. But it looks like she's doing great, with or without knowing.
The boys halt their discussion to turn and stare at me, which makes me feel self-conscious enough to stop dancing and turn to face them, also. Curiosity fills my Noise at the prospect of another woman also having Noise. If that were true, even if it was just one other person, it would give me all of the information I needed, answer all of the questions that burned through my mind ever since the war ended. With a newfound determination, I begin to march over to them, ready to see the elder Spackle and finally learn the truth –
Until someone grips onto the end of my jacket sleeve, forcefully pulling me back.
"Hey! Aren't you the magical girl with Noise?"
At first I'm stunned, whipping around to meet my new company though no one appears to be behind me. But after shifting my gaze downward, I am met with the wide, astonished eyes of a child. She stares at me admirably and I let out a sigh of relief – for some reason I thought it would have been Mona. Seeing no harm in speaking with her, I crouch down to meet the girl at eye level.
"Um, yes? But you can just call me Viola." I say to her, smiling. "What's your name?"
But the little girl doesn't answer my question, and instead turns to yell out towards the rest of the camp. "Hey everyone, look! I found the girl with Noise!"
Soon, everyone's eyes fall to me, excited whispers and even some chants coming from the crowd. My cheeks blush, and my mind wrestles with the feeling of both embarrassment and flattery. Having Noise wasn't much of an accomplishment – other than what it did for us in the war. But with everyone staring at me as if they expect a speech or some kind of demonstration, I choose to keep those thoughts to myself.
Except for Todd, who easily reads the slight panic in my Noise. He steps away from Bradley and 1017 before hurriedly taking his place at my side.
They're all watching me. I say to Todd with my Noise, concealing my thoughts to everyone else.
I kno… but this wouldn't be the first time. They've always looked up to yer, Viola.
I swallow, knowing that he's right –
We've always been the leader of the community –
So not only do I owe an explanation about my Noise to myself –
But I owe it to them, too.
Though tonight, our community doesn't seem interested in explanations, as they surround Todd and I with wonder and amusement in their eyes. We step closer together before the people begin to make their requests known –
"Is it true that you two created an explosion with your Noise?"
"Is Todd really the only one who can read your thoughts, Viola?"
"Can you two really create LIGHT in the palm of your hands?"
Todd's Noise becomes overwhelmed by the questions, but mine revels in the attention. We didn't have all of the answers, but we did have the ability to give them something. I look to Todd who instantly looks back, his eyes searching mine before I pose an idea through my Noise.
We should just show them, right?
Todd's Noise is hesitant, but we're surrounded by people now, and likely wouldn't be let through until we gave them something to see. So instead of answering my question, Todd gives me a small smile, grabs my hand, and calls to his Noise.
I do the same, stirring up our power until a white light shines between our palms. It's even brighter than the bonfire behind us, and the crowd goes quiet for a moment before erupting in cheers. Todd and I look to each other before smiling ourselves –
Should we show em some more? He asks me, his Noise excited, and I can't help but to agree.
Why not?
Todd and I let go of each other's hands before asking the crowd to back up – and they do so, happily. I see Todd's idea in his Noise, going back to the snowball fight we once had, and my Noise grows with excitement at the prospect of doing it again, this time for the amusement of our settlers. Todd reaches into the snow to form his own snowball while I do the same, backing up some before tauting him in my Noise –
Try not to lose this time in front of our people, Todd.
He only grins mischievously before letting his snowball loose.
It flies into the air at full speed, a glow of light trailing behind it, and the sight causes the settlers to scream. But I quickly react by sending a surge of light towards the snowball, causing it to explode into a flurry of snow once my light makes contact with it. The settlers cheer, lifting their hands to catch the small pieces of snow, and Todd lets out an actual laugh at their reaction before doing the same thing over again. We continue on like that, Todd throwing a powerful ball of snow, and me hitting it with Noise, spraying the settlers as they dance and laugh underneath our own little snowstorm.
See? This is better than dancin. Todd says to me through his Noise, and I laugh.
I'll let it slide, for now. I tell him. Grand finale?
I see Todd shake his head in agreement, but as soon as he readies himself to throw another snowball, we're interrupted by a loud voice calling towards us.
"There! They're over there!"
Todd and I instantly stop our demonstration, watching as the crowd parts to let Mona and an older Spackle walk through. She's got a wide, crazed smile on her face, nearly running towards us, and Todd quickly steps to my side as she runs up. The older Spackle stays behind, a less enthused expression on her face.
"Todd, Viola." She says, smiling. "I'm so sorry to interrupt but – "
"Wut's goin on, Mona?" Todd asks, impatience in his tone.
"I have someone I'd like for you to meet." She says, gesturing to the older looking spackle woman. "She's very interested in learning more about your Noise –"
But I'm not as convinced, getting my own glimpse of the female Spackle, who looks mad, irritated. She's successfully hiding her Noise from us, but I've learned to read people's faces, know how they feel just based on their eyes.
And there's no denying that she is unhappy with us.
It's nice to see you're having fun with your Noise. She finally says to us. But if you wouldn't mind, I'd like to have a little word with you both. To inform you of just how much fun it can be.
Todd and I do not miss the sarcasm in her Noise.
A/N: Thank you guys so much for your wonderful reviews – I appreciate you SO MUCH. With all the crazy things going on in the world, you all have lifted my mood tremendously. I hope you guys know how loved you are, and that you're all taking care good cares of yourselves! Read good books, watch fun movies. Or read the next chapter to this story – I'm going to have it up by tomorrow!
And before I forget… CAN WE ALL JUST RAVE ABOUT THE FACT THAT THE CHAOS WALKING MOVIE WILL COME OUT JANUARY 21, 2021? It seems like a long time from now, but it will go by SO fast. I seriously can't wait!
