Remus spent the rest of Thursday feeling a mixture of sick and self hatred. Every time he looked at Sirius his stomach lurched again. He was also quite confused until finally he convinced himself that he just misunderstood, just like Fawley. Sirius's parents may have been crazy but it couldn't be... that bad... could it? Sirius was so vibrant, noisy, everywhere, and if he were being hurt he'd be different, wouldn't he? Finally he just buried himself into denial. It couldn't be that bad. A tiny voice inside of him kept insisting it could be but he just did his best to ignore it, for now. Besides, he didn't have any evidence. Just thoughts, possibilities, and Sirius saying something that could be taken a different way.
Sirius grumbled around the dorm for a while after his fight with Regulus until he finally calmed down, returning to his usual smiling self, full of energy and unable to take any kind of nap before Astronomy. Spinnet finally threatened them until James, Sirius, and Peter tumbled down to the common room to hang out. Remus was too tired to join them, curling up in his bed for some sleep. It didn't work too well since he had low grade nightmares of Sirius being hurt which caused his sleep to be fitful, though at least he didn't scream.
The first class of Astronomy went well since the moon wasn't visible one bit, not even a sliver. Remus could feel it in the sky but he couldn't see it while looking at the tapestry of stars. Now that was perfect. He loved new moons, he loved being able to do this without a visual reminder of his hell.
Two weeks, he thought as he began charting out some of the stars. His drawing was horrible. Making a noise of disgust he crumpled the parchment up then tried again though it wasn't much better. He couldn't help but glance sideways at Sirius's chart. He was barely doing any of the work (instead whispering jokes with James) but what he did have was beautiful. He's so good at art, Remus thought a little jealously. At least I'm not as bad as James though.
/\/\/\/\/\
Fridays were as busy as Mondays, with Potions first, so by the time detention rolled around Remus was pretty tired. He miserably followed his friends to the owlery, hoping they wouldn't be doing what he thought they'd be doing. Which turned out to be yes, that's what they were doing: cleaning. Surprisingly, though, it was a student in charge of their detention, a seventh year who worked in the owlery often since she wanted to work in the post office after graduation. They were given buckets, scrub brushes, brooms, pans, everything they needed. The buckets were enchanted to float alongside them so when one of them needed to climb up the ladders it would follow.
"Does it matter which one of us cleans the top cubbies?" Sirius asked. The seventh year shook her head. "Okay..." He turned around. "Cause I know you have problems with heights sometimes," he said to Remus who felt rather warmed by Sirius considering him like that.
"I don't mind doing the top ones," James said.
"Okay. We can take care of the nests, Remy can do the floors," Sirius suggested.
The lowest homes were a little above head height for Remus so there wasn't much point in him helping the others with the owl nests. That was fine for him since the owls hated him, sensing the beast lurking beneath the surface.
The first thing they all needed to do, though, was reassure their owls they didn't need them. All four owls fluttered down, assuming their owners needed to send something off. Arthur crashed into Remus who nearly tumbled over in a whirl of feathers and talons. "Hey, hey, you all right?" He got Arthur settled on his arm, heart sinking to see that he had lost some more feathers. He looked so old. "You're okay," he said, nuzzling his owl. "I don't need any letters sent off."
The previous year he and his mother had been sending letters back and forth constantly. But they all knew Arthur wasn't really up to so many trips. Hope reluctantly agreed to lessen the post between them. So far he only had one letter from her (mostly her being VERY furious he had gotten detention, furious he had gotten 'dragged into it', and reminding him he needed to lay low and not get involved in anything).
"Hey! STOP IT! Oi! Fili! Stooop!" Sirius complained as his insane owl kept trying to attack poor Cocoa, Peter's owl. Filibuster hissed then flew out the window, probably swearing in owl language.
"Your owl's nuts, mate," James said, grinning broadly.
Sirius plucked a feather out of his hair. "Yeah, yeah," he grumbled.
"Like owner, like pet?" Peter laughed. Sirius stuck his tongue out but looked quite amused.
"Well, Cocoa has the sweetest disposition, so it fits," Remus said which made Peter blush. "And Godric's the most pompous."
"HEY!" James complained.
"Arthur definitely pushes himself more than he should, so that fits too," said Sirius. Now Remus stuck his tongue out then returned to stroking Arthur's head.
Once all their owls were satisfied with the attention (minus Filibuster who was long gone) the four boys began cleaning. James, Sirius, and Peter began cleaning the top ones while Remus worked at scrubbing off the many perches scattered around the room. He couldn't properly do the floors until they were done with the nests so he steeled himself to go up a ladder. Not all the way to the top but he did work on the lower ones, underneath the ones his friends had cleaned. It really wasn't so bad and he was able to work with only a little bit of dizziness.
"Why do they always make us clean the Muggle way?" Sirius complained eventually.
"Probably to build character or something," replied James with a snort.
"If we could use magic it'd not really be a detention," Pete pointed out.
Other students came and went, sending mail off with their owls. A couple Slytherins came in at one point, making threats if the Gryffindors did anything to their birds.
"Maybe you're crazy enough to hurt an innocent pet, but we're not," Sirius called down as the Slytherins left.
It took them ages to clean out the owlery, even with all four of them working hard. By the time they finished they were tired, covered in grossness, and Remus thought his arms might fall off. He couldn't imagine how the others felt. They miserably plodded back to the Gryffindor tower, getting into trouble with a prefect for being out well after curfew (it was nearly ten) until James showed him their detention slip. The prefect eyed in carefully as if suspecting it might be fake then waved them on.
They all took super long showers (listening to music as they cleaned themselves off, as James brought his phonograph in to play in the bathroom). Remus was the first one out, Sirius the last. Since it was Friday night they didn't really need to hurry to bed and in fact after they all got into their pajamas they just went down into the common room. There were still quite a few students milling about, all of them sixth or seventh years. The four Marauders plopped down on one of the comfiest couches, playing cards until well after all the other students disappeared up to their dorms. It was nearly two before they finally crawled into their beds.
Remus was beyond exhausted and slept completely soundly until someone shook him violently awake. He yelped in fear, sitting upright, nearly banging into James.
"Come on, sleepyhead!" he said brightly, too brightly for what felt like an ungodly hour. Remus's eyes flickered to the clock. Eight-forty-five.
"S'only been like, six hours," Remus moaned, flopping back, yanking his covers back over his head.
James climbed onto the bed and began jumping on it. "Wake UP! Wake UP! Wake UP! You PROMISED!"
"Promised what!?" Remus wailed, burrowing his head under his pillow as his body was bounced around.
James fell next to him, pulling the covers back, yanking the pillow away. "Tryouts," he said, wrapping his arms around Remus which sent a shock of terror through his body at being hugged like this, so closely, and in bed. "You promised."
"Th-that's not t-till ten!" Remus squeaked.
"I wanna be there at nine-thirty, and we need brekkie and—and mental preparation." James let go of him, climbing over him to get out of bed instead of just getting out the other side, limbs thwacking against Remus who debated whether or not he could get away with murder. "Sirius'n'Pete are up."
"Why did you want to stay up so late if we couldn't sleep in?" Remus sat up, swinging his legs off the mattress, slipping his feet into his worn out slippers. He had forgotten completely about tryouts the night before. James had been the one urging his friends to stay up so late.
James laughed. "Because I couldn't sleep, silly. I didn't get to sleep until nearly four." He began bouncing lightly on the balls of his feet. "Come on. Hurry up."
Remus grouchily got ready for the day, going too slow for James's liking. Luckily they had showers the night before so he didn't need to take one. He brushed his teeth, his hair, washed his face off, then got dressed. One of his many pairs of battered jeans and a long-sleeved red shirt. When he went back into the dorm James gave an annoyed sound.
"No!" James said. "I got you this."
He handed fabric to Remus. A t-shirt. It would have fit him perfectly, which meant he couldn't wear it. His scar would only just barely be covered, part of it peeking out. "It's too chilly for a t-shirt."
"Not really," Sirius said. He was wearing the t-shirt. It was crimson, with a big gold J on the front. Peter had an identical one. "It's a little chilly but it'd be fine wearing a t-shirt."
Remus fingered the shirt in his hands. "All right, j—just a moment."
He dug through his things to find a long-sleeved yellow shirt. He went back to the bathroom to put the yellow shirt on, then the J t-shirt over. It was strange wearing a brand new article of clothing that fit him so well. "Better?" he asked when he went back.
"I guess," James said. "Now let's go."
Sirius grabbed a bundle of fabric, carrying it down to the Great Hall. He, Peter, and Remus all ate while James poked at his food, too excited to eat. He managed to get some food down though not much. He kept jiggling, casting anxious looks down the table towards Bell and the rest of the Quidditch team. At nine-thirty the Marauders went out to the Quidditch pitch. It was a little chilly, in Remus's opinion, but Sirius and Peter didn't say anything. They sat in the bleachers to wait for a whole bloody half hour. Remus pulled a book out to read, yawning several times, wishing he was back in bed.
Eventually more students filed into the stadium as well as the Gryffindor team.
"Good luck, mate," Sirius said, giving James a hearty hug.
"Not that you need it," laughed Pete.
James bolted down the stairs, joining the group of those trying out. Sirius unfurled the fabric he brought, revealing a large red-and-gold banner. James Potter: Quaffle King! with well done lions rampant on either side, facing the words. He wheedled Remus until he made the letters flash and glow, then Remus returned to his book.
"Aren't you going to watch?" Peter asked, poking at Remus's shoulder.
"I will when James goes," he replied.
Since Bell was a new Captain that meant the old team members had to tryout as well. First were the Seekers, there were only a couple of those including the one who had been on the team previously—clearly the best. Then the Beaters tried out, finally the Chasers and Keepers at the same time, in groups. James was in the third group.
"POTTER! POTTER! POTTER!" Sirius and Peter chanted as James flew into the air.
Remus closed his book, standing up to watch. Bell threw the ball, and the Chasers began. In a normal game they'd be working together however this time they were independent. A fifth year got the Quaffle forth, heading towards one of the hoops. James was flying underneath while the third year in the group was buzzing around the fifth year, trying to get the ball. The fifth year threw the ball towards the hoop and James suddenly shot up, grabbing the ball and flying upside down high above the other players. The two other wannabe-Chasers took off after him. James did a barrel spin to right himself then suddenly dropped down, well below the other Chasers who had been climbing upward. There was a collective gasp from most the spectators at the drop.
"Idiot!" Sirius shouted. "YOU IDIOT!"
"What happened?" Remus asked as the other two Chasers dove down, and James went back up.
"He didn't dive, he just stopped his broom to drop," Sirius explained, not taking his eyes off their friend who threw the Quaffle. The Keeper trying out missed the ball, and James got a score. "It's very dangerous."
"But cool," Peter breathed out, eyes huge.
"Stupid," Sirius growled then, after a second or two, "but yeah kinda cool."
Remus watched James as the tryout proceeded, constantly needing to ask his friends what was going on. Sirius and Pete did their best to keep him educated, explaining some of the tricks James performed. James scored again, and again, and again. He didn't always have the Quaffle, but almost always ended up with it. He was faster, more agile than the other two Chasers. By the time Bell blew her whistle it was clear who had won that.
Bell announced who would be continuing on. Two Keepers, four beaters, and six Chasers for the final round of tryouts. "Continuing on with tryouts for Chaser," Bell said loudly, her voice echoing across the pitch, "Burrowall, Cinderash, Howell, Kirke, Litten..."
Sirius, Peter, and Remus all leaned forward. Remus clutched the railing.
"...and Potter."
Of course.
This was going to be somewhat of a regular game. The hopeful team members were split up into two teams, minus the Seekers, then the round began. Again, Sirius and Pete explained things to Remus though by now he had a little bit of a grasp on what was going on. Now James was working with a team, and he didn't have the ball as often. He got the Quaffle quite a bit however passed it to his teammates whenever needed. He did score most the points for his team though.
It was around one in the afternoon when Bell ended the 'game'. "All right, everyone! The list will be posted on the notice board tomorrow!" Bell said.
There were loud groans. "How come we can't know now?" demanded one of the ones who had tried out for Chaser.
"Because I need to think," Bell snapped right back. "If you don't like it, you can lump it. Dismissed!"
Sirius, Peter, and Remus filed down to the pitch to meet up with a sweaty, tired James. "You think I did well?" he asked as soon as they approached him. "I don't know if I did. I missed a few goals, and—"
"You did brilliant!" Sirius said, wrapping an arm around James's shoulders. "Absolutely brilliant."
"If they don't put you on the team, they're mental," Peter said, clapping his hands. "I never realized how good you were at Quidditch! I mean, I've seen you fly but this—wow, just wow!"
James beamed, eyes sliding to Remus who was rather uneasy from the fact James still had a hold on his broom, the silver flashing in the afternoon light. "Um, I really don't know much but it seems like you did well," he muttered. "You made the most goals out of all those trying out for Chaser."
"Ugh, I'm going to die before tomorrow morning!" James moaned as he thankfully put away his broom. "Simply die!"
"Rest in peace," Remus said. James glared as his carrying case snapped shut. Remus smiled sweetly in return. "Let's go, I'm starving."
"I'm starving," James said as they headed to the castle. "I barely ate anything."
James was a mess the rest of the day. He was jittery, on edge, stared at Bell whenever they happened to be in the same room, paced a lot, tugged at his hair, groaned about his misses, and pretty much drove his friends crazy. After Remus sent his letter home off with Arthur, he disappeared into the library just before supper because he couldn't take another second, staying in there working on Prewett's essays until curfew (which, for second years, was extended to eight pm). Peter actually joined him after supper, complaining that James hadn't calmed down one bit.
"We all know he made it," he sighed as he stared at a blank piece of parchment. "Except for him."
"I'll eat my hat if he's not on the team," said Remus.
Pete laughed quietly. "I almost wish he doesn't make it, just to see that!"
At seven-forty-five the two boys reluctantly headed back to the tower where they found James pacing in the dorm while Sirius flipped through a magazine. James kept pacing even after Remus tried putting on some music, even after Peter started a card game, even after Sirius threatened to beat James over the head with his broom.
"How am I supposed to sleep tonight?!" James demanded at one point.
"Want me to get some sleep potion from Pomfrey?" Remus asked.
James froze, obviously contemplating that. "No," he finally said, sitting down on his bed. "I want to wake up early."
"You're gonna wake us up, aren't you?" Pete asked.
James narrowed his eyes. "Don't you want to see as soon as Bell posts the list?"
"Of course we do," Sirius said quickly. "We'll be there with you." He turned his head so James couldn't see his face as he stuck his tongue out and crossed his eyes. Remus and Pete stifled giggles.
They stayed up late again, going down into the common room eventually so they wouldn't bother Spinnet and Struthers. James was really wound up, still having a difficult time sitting down so they played charades for a while. That helped burn off some of James's energy. Then Peter suggested they do some invisible exploring which James leapt at. He ran up the stairs, returning with his cloak.
"You coming with us tonight, Remus?" he asked.
"N... no, I'll stay and keep watch," he said.
"Want me to stay with you?" Sirius offered.
"Er, no, that's fine," he said as James handed him his watch. "I'm just really tired."
Indeed he fell asleep shortly after they left, the watch beeping him awake every ten minutes. This time they didn't all get to bed until around three in the morning, an hour later than the night before. Remus had one of his awful headaches as he collapsed into bed, grumbling to himself as he drifted into sleep... and being awoken only a couple hours later.
I'm going to murder him, Remus decided as he threw clean clothes on, glaring at James. Sirius and Peter were both scowling, not that James seemed to notice.
"It's... seven in the bloody morning," Sirius growled as they went down the stairs. "You think she's going to post it this early?"
"She might," James protested as he threw himself into an armchair that was across the floor from the notice board. There were papers all over, most of them advertisements for clubs, one long bit of parchment stating the rules, a few mentioning lost items or requests.
Peter curled up on a couch next to Remus. "James, come on, you're on the team," he said rather sleepily. Remus slid down, too tired to care of how close they were, of the fact their shoulders were bumped up against one another, that his head drooped down onto Peter's shoulder. He fell asleep. He slept on and off over the next hour until just after eight, when Patricia Bell came down the stairs.
"Waiting?" she asked, grinning at James.
"Not really," he replied, trying—and failing—to sound casual.
Bell just shook her head then put the parchment up on the center of the board. Remus realized there were several other wannabe-Quidditch members waiting too. James stayed seated. Bell finished with the sticking spell then walked off as the other five people converged on the notice board. James slowly stood up, wiping his hands off on his jeans. Sirius gave him a thumbs up.
"This is RIDICULOUS!" shouted one of the older boys looking at the notice. "That's bollocks!"
James edged his way to the notice, staring up at the paper. Remus waited for a reaction, which didn't happen right away. Then James turned to face his friends, raising his eyebrows, then a grin spread across his face.
"I made the team!" he said, jumping in the air, fists punching up.
"YES!" Sirius threw himself at his friend, wrapping his arms around him in a hug. They spun for a second then high fived each other.
The older student who was expressing his anger went quiet, glaring at James. "It's not fair," he said darkly. "You're only a second year. You should be a reserve. BELL!" He stomped over to Bell who just folded her arms. "Why is he on the team?" He pointed at James who was now being high fived by Peter and Remus as they gave their congratulations. "He should be a reserve, not fully on the team! He's only a second year!"
"He's a damn good Chaser, that's what he is," Bell replied.
"Aw, c'mon, Kirke, no hard feelings?" James asked brightly. "You're on the team too."
The older boy clenched his teeth. "I'm a reserve, that's not the team!" He looked like he wanted to wallop James, smelled like he was about to explode with fury. Remus felt a little afraid. "Twelve year olds shouldn't be on the team!"
"Kirke, calm down," Bell said in a tight voice. "Potter was simply the best who tried out for Chaser. You did terrific too, that's why you're a reserve—"
"Twelve year olds shouldn't be on the team!" Kirke snapped violently. The common room had fallen quiet, watching this exchange with interest, though since it was so early in the morning for a Sunday there weren't many witnesses. "How is it FAIR?! How would you feel if you were shunted aside for a little child?!"
Bell jerked her chin up, eyes flashing. "I am willing to admit that he's a more natural Chaser than myself."
James grinned so broadly it had to hurt. Kirke still looked rather murderous. Everyone waited, to see what he would do next. Kirke stood there staring at James for several seconds of tense silence before he stormed off, leaving the common room. Remus let out a quiet, relieved breath of air.
"You all right?" Bell asked, coming closer to James.
"I'm great!" he promised. "I can't believe I'm on the team!"
Bell rolled her eyes. "Puh-lease, you don't need to bother with that."
James scuffed the toe of his sneaker against the floor. "Yeah, well."
Bell thumped his shoulder. "See you at the meeting tomorrow." She smiled at his three friends then walked off.
James spun around to face them again. "I have to go write my parents right now. I'll see you guys at breakfast!" He took off sprinting out of the common room.
Sirius folded his hands under his chin. "I'm happy for him, but Merlin is he going to be insufferable now." He sighed then gave a helpless sort of shrug. "C'mon then, Marauders. Let's get some much needed breakfast."
