"5i uf de Uhr" by Nemo


Santana's POV

It's the surrealist thing.

Years ago, she could have never pictured this but it's happening right in front of her eyes. Her mother is doing the dishes together with the woman Santana is sleeping with.

They are standing there in mom's and Kirk's kitchen, side by side, casually talking something. Her mother is handing Brittany the soapy plates, knives and forks so she can dry them with the blue towel in her hands.

Santana wishes that someone would pinch her right now to make sure she's not dreaming it. But no one is near to pinch her. Kirk is outside by the pool, smoking his cigar and Loretta has disappeared to the bathroom.

Santana is leaning against the cooking island and watching in awe.

Her mom and Brittany are interacting like it's no big deal when it's the biggest freaking deal. No one seems to notice Santana's nearly bursting insides, and no one is here to witness this!

When Santana got a phone call from her mother yesterday she was more than surprised to hear her mother say the words: "You can bring your friend to the brunch at our place. Kirk and I would like to get to know her better."

Santana had doubts until the very last minute to bring Brittany along. She just wasn't used to bring someone to family gatherings. In fact it's the first time.

It's nice. New but nice.

She spent the first half hour sitting at the table completely tense because she was waiting for something to happen. For her mother to snap at Santana or even worse – at Brittany. She waited for a remark that would make Santana want to get up and leave but as the minutes went by, she started to relax. There was nothing.

They ate in peace all together. Her mom, Kirk, Loretta, Brittany and herself. They talked about this and that and Brittany… Brittany has been great.

She made a joke that had Kirk laughing out loud. It was the cutest thing Santana ever witnessed.

Now they're here and she's still processing the fact that her mother seems to like Brittany. Despite the fact that she knows about how she's clearly not just Santana's friend. Loretta made sure with several comments that no one could not know. But their mom doesn't seem to mind.

Or maybe she just silently tolerates it now. Either way, it feels nice.

When Loretta steps into the kitchen, she claps her hands together to get everyone's attention.

"I was thinking we could go watch a movie or something later on. Who's in?"

Santana chuckles when she looks at her sister. She's so happy, Santana can tell. While Santana is happy, too, she doesn't want to strain the still delicate bond that is growing in her family.

She puts an arm around her sister's middle.

"That sounds nice but some other time, ok? I have a deadline with my employer, so I'll have to put in a nightshift. Brittany wants to go visit her grandma later on… but I'd love to go watch a movie with you guys. Maybe next weekend?"

Loretta sighs but eventually nods with a smile.

"That would be great. It's really sweet you visit your grandma, Brittany. How is she?" Loretta wants to know when hopping onto the kitchen island.

Brittany dries her hands because they're done with the dishes. She tells them about how her grandma lives at the nursing home and about her ups and downs. When she tells them that she often visits her in the early mornings before heading to work, Loretta pulls a face.

"I could never get up that early! I know you're a landscaper so you probably have to get to work early enough. How's work by the way?"

Santana watches how both, Loretta and her mother listen to Brittany and how they get to know her better with every word she says.

She's so in awe that she nearly misses something that is news to her, too.

"Yeah so I've always loved my job although it can be really hard work at times and you never quite know for how long the business is going up. It can always change. Lately I've been thinking about it a lot actually… I'm not so sure if this is what I want to do for the next ten years."

Santana wants to ask but her mom is quicker.

"Why not?"

Brittany shrugs. She looks down at her feet.

"It's not fulfilling me anymore. Not a hundred percent. But I guess I shouldn't complain. It's a good job."

Again Santana opens her mouth to say something but this time Loretta jumps in first.

"Of course you can complain! It's not always fun and sunshine, right? We're all entitled to say what it is that we truly want to do in life. So, tell us."

Brittany looks at Loretta with a big question mark across her face.

"Huh?"

"What is it that you'd rather want to do for a living? If not landscaping?" Loretta explains.

Brittany shakes her head with a short laugh.

"I don't know. I mean there are so many things you could do nowadays… I just wish I could do something that makes more sense to me than making gardens look pretty. Something that is a little more important."

Loretta seems to think about Brittany's words. Actually everybody seems to be doing so because it's suddenly quiet in the kitchen.

"My aunt Kathrin keeps asking me to come help her at the ranch. They've been short on staff members and she's really worried these days. I always wonder if I shouldn't be doing something like that. Go out there for a season to find out what I really want."

Finally Santana finds a moment to bring herself into the conversation.

"Why didn't you say anything?" She blurts. Brittany looks at her questioningly. "I know that you wanted to stay there for a while but when you came back, I didn't think about it anymore."

Brittany quickly shakes her head and waves it off.

"I told her that I can't come right now. I want to be there for you. My aunt will find someone else. Please don't worry, ok?"

Santana doesn't know what to say. She instantly feels guilty.

"But you would want to do it? Work there for a season?" She wants to know.

Brittany shrugs again. She almost looks embarrassed.

"It's something I've thought about… but it can wait. You're more important to me."

Santana can hear her sister muttering a low "aaw".

"Hey Brittany!" Kirk's voice sounds from outside. "I want to show you something in our garden! This one plant looks like it's about to die and I have no idea what to do with it."

Santana doesn't know if she should be thankful for Kirk's interruption or not. She wants to know more about Brittany's dreams and wishes but she's also kind of scared to hear them.

What if they don't include her?

What if they do?

Brittany's eyes quickly meet Santana's before she excuses herself to join Kirk outside. When she walks by, her hand lightly touches Santana's for a short moment. Like she's telling her not to worry.

But Santana does worry. Hearing that Brittany isn't fulfilled almost hurts.

"You look like a puppy who lost its mother, Santana. She said not to worry about it, right?" Loretta tries to cheer her up when Brittany is gone.

Santana shakes her head.

"Yeah but I don't want everything to be about me just because I lost my home. We both had a separate life before the fire. Now I live with her but that doesn't mean she has to put her own life on hold, right?"

Santana's mother grabs a pot to prepare some coffee. Then she speaks up.

"Of course not but you can't blame her for still doing so. It doesn't mean she'll never go to the ranch, right? Right now she doesn't want to. She's old enough to stand up for herself. But my advice is to talk to her again. In private."

Santana nods silently when she watches her mother making coffee. The lovely scent of the same brand of coffee they always had on Sunday brunches brings back some memories from earlier years.

Things are different now. Frankly, she never thought this would happen. That she'd spend another brunch with her mother at the same table, let alone bring a woman as her date.

Things are different and she feels it in her heart that Brittany is the reason behind it. She helped Santana to open up again. To give love another chance. Not only the love for a partner but also for her family.


Many hours later she can hardly keep her eyes open but she's so close to finish translating a big chapter that she pushes through. Sitting at Brittany's small kitchen table isn't that comfortable to write on her computer but it's better than the couch that's been giving her some terrible back aches.

She misses her big living room table and the soft chairs that allowed her to sit there comfortably for hours.

She's surrounded by darkness because it's in the middle of the night. Brittany went to bed hours ago. She's probably all cuddled up under Santana's duvet and the thought of falling asleep next to her really makes Santana want to shut down her computer right now. But she has to finish this.

She'll sleep in the morning when Brittany goes to work. They agreed to talk about the work season thing again tomorrow when she comes home for dinner. So until then Santana decides it's for the best to focus on her work.

With a sigh she starts typing again, ignoring her dry eyes and the urge to cuddle up to the warm body waiting in bed.


Brittany's POV

Her forehead hurts when she enters her apartment after an extra-long day. She almost forgot about how she hit her head at work today when she got up from the ground and there was a windowsill she didn't see. It hurt like crazy so the owner of the house gave her a bag of frozen peas.

When she takes off her baseball hat, she gets reminded of the bump.

"Ow" She whispers when she lets her fingers run over the sore spot on her forehead. A delicious smell fills her nose, once she enters the kitchen still fully dressed in her work clothes. She's simply too tired to take off her shoes.

Santana is standing by the stove wearing an apron. Her hair is up in a bun and her left hand steadily stirring something in a pot. She's humming along a song that's playing on the small radio which is placed on the kitchen counter.

When Brittany steps closer Santana startles.

"Oh my - I didn't hear you coming home." She exclaims but the shock on her face immediately gets replaced with a loving smile. Once Brittany is close enough to lean in for a kiss, Santana raises a hand to stop her from succeeding. She grabs Brittany's jaw.

"What's this?" She asks with an upset voice, staring at Brittany's forehead. Brittany already wants to walk away because she's too tired to explain but Santana holds her back. She drops the spoon she had been holding and takes Brittany's face into her hands to get a better look.

"Did you get into a fight?" She wants to know with an incredulous look. Brittany shakes her head and lets Santana guide her to one of the kitchen chairs. She watches how the brunette goes to the fridge and gets an ice pad from the freezer.

She wraps it in a towel before stepping back in front of Brittany. Carefully she presses it against Brittany's aching forehead. When she looks down at her, Brittany almost forgets the pain.

"I hit my head on the corner of a windowsill. But I assume getting into a fight would have been sexier." She chuckles when Santana puts her hands on her waist, slowly shaking her head.

"You getting hurt isn't sexy at all!" She opposes with concern. "Why didn't you come home to get some rest?"

"Because…" Brittany takes over the ice pad with one hand and pulls Santana in her lap with the other. "I can't just take off the rest of the day when my work in the garden isn't done. A bump on the head isn't reason enough to go home. But don't worry… it almost doesn't hurt anymore."

Santana watches how Brittany lets the pad soothingly rest against her skin.

"Well I'm going to take care of you then for the rest of the evening. I made you some pasta with tomato sauce. I think this time I added the right amount of salt. It actually tastes pretty good. Are you hungry?"

Brittany smiles at the woman sitting on her knees.

"Starving" She mumbles before she finally gets the kiss she's been waiting for ever since she stepped into the kitchen.

"Well then… go change. You bring all the dirt into my kitchen!" Santana says before making Brittany get up and ushering her back into the small hallway.

"Your kitchen?" Brittany wants to know with a laugh.

"Yes!" Santana shouts when she hurries back to the stove. "First I cleaned it, then I cooked! I have been a pretty good housewife all day."

With a grin Brittany takes off her shoes and then goes to the bedroom to change into some comfortable clothes. Since her apartment is tiny, Santana will still hear her from the kitchen.

"And a hot one!" Brittany says while pulling a fresh shirt over her head.

"Oh yeah? You like the idea of me being your housewife?" Santana's voice sounds amused. Brittany thinks about it for a moment.

Once she's dressed properly, she steps back into the kitchen.

"Well… I like the idea of you cooking for me from time to time." She explains when sitting back at the already dished up table. "Just as much as the idea of getting to cook for you in return. Or cooking together…"

Brittany watches how Santana carries the heavy pot of pasta over to the table. She fills two plates with a big spoon.

"I like that, too." Santana mumbles when she sits down in front of Brittany. They smile at each other before Santana raises her glass of water. "To your ugly bump on the forehead and your will power to push through although you were in pain."

Brittany laughs wholeheartedly at Santana's words before clinking their glasses.

"It's not ugly! Is it ugly?" She wants to know when touching her bump again. "Ow!"

Santana rolls her eyes.

"It will if you don't stop touching it, silly."

They glare at each other in a bantering way before finally taking their first bites of pasta.

Brittany has to close her eyes at the taste. She chews contently.

"I have to admit" She begins her judgement after a couple silent seconds. "I kind of already expected it to be too salty but this… is wonderful."

Santana touches the spot above her heart to thank her for the nice words.

"Why thank you. It means a lot to hear that from the master chef." She says between chewing. Brittany nods.

"Yeah. You do make a great housewife." She compliments Santana with a wink of the eye.

"Don't get too used to it." Santana counters and takes a sip of her water. Then she smiles at Brittany before winking back at her.

Too bad… Brittany thinks.

She could definitely get used to this.


After the best pasta dinner she's had in a long time, they've settled down on the couch. Santana is typing something into the computer on her lap while Brittany tries to focus on the book in her hands.

The reason she's having trouble to understand the words she's reading is because a couple minutes ago Santana brought up the topic from yesterday again. She asked about aunt Kathrin and if Brittany wants to go work for her.

Brittany thought she wasn't' ready to talk about it yet and said that they should have that conversation another day.

Now that she has no idea what she's been reading for the past two pages, she knows that this conversation probably can't wait forever. She sighs audibly, hoping to get Santana to look up.

When the brunette doesn't do so, Brittany puts her book away and grabs Santana's computer to do the same.

Santana gives her a confused look.

"I'm sorry about before" Brittany explains and pulls her legs up so she can face Santana in a comfortable position. "You were right when you said that we should talk about it. It's just… I don't want to leave again and know that you're here at a time where you could use support and company. I'm not going to make that mistake again."

Santana's facials go from confusion to compassion.

"Britt… you're not responsible for my wellbeing. Of course I am glad to have you. You've helped me so much these past weeks but I am responsible. I have to put my life back together. I'll have to do it on my own at one point."

Brittany watches how Santana takes her hand into her own.

"Yeah but… last time I went to Arizona it felt so wrong because I didn't say a word and you must have been so disappointed when you realized I was gone. If I go there again, I'll probably miss you so much that I can't even enjoy it."

Santana chuckles lightly. She squeezes Brittany's hand.

"This time it would be different. You wouldn't be leaving without a word because we're talking about it now. I'd miss you, too. But maybe it's good thing."

Brittany frowns because she doesn't understand. So Santana goes on.

"Don't get me wrong… I love being so close to you every day. But we have to be honest – we wouldn't be living together if it wasn't for the fact that my house got burned down. I should have been looking for a new place to live. I didn't because this feels so nice. But this isn't a temporary solution. I'll have to move into a new apartment."

Brittany swallows at the thought of Santana moving out again. This has indeed felt very nice. More than she expected in the beginning.

"You don't have to worry about me. I have my sister and Kurt and it looks like I'm bonding with my mother again. I wouldn't be alone." Santana's encouraging words do something to Brittany.

They're warm but they also hurt in a stupid way. She's gotten so used to be there for Santana that she doesn't want someone else to do it.

"Is it what you want? To go to your aunt's ranch for a while?" Santana wants to know.

Brittany tilts her head to the side with a sigh. She has no idea what she wants.

She wants Santana.

To fall asleep next to her.

To stroll through the supermarket holding hands.

To join her to brunches at her family's place.

But she also wants to find out what the future holds for her workwise. She can't deny that she's been longing for an opportunity like this.

"Yes" She mumbles honestly. "But I don't want to go away and lose-"

"Brittany, you can't hold back something you really want because of me. I don't want that. You wouldn't want me to deny myself something I'd really want, either. Right?"

Brittany shakes her head. Santana goes on.

"See? And I have to be honest… I still need time to fully get over what happened. Being here with you is making me want to enjoy it while I should take time to process and move on."

Brittany senses Santana's hands pulling her in for a hug.

"Don't look so sad. It's a good thing. I want to support you just like you've been supporting me. If you want to go work for your aunt for a while then I will encourage you. I'll come visit if I may."

Brittany smiles into the crook of Santana's neck.

"I'd love that" She whispers while holding Santana close. The lump in her throat is still there but at least it doesn't hurt anymore.

She'd love to show Santana the ranch. The life outside of a city. The animals, the nature, the good food.

A very different life.


When they're lying in bed an hour later and Brittany still can't sleep, she snuggles up to Santana. She's fast asleep and her skin smells so incredibly good.

Her scent makes Brittany feel like she's home.

She is at home. This is her place, her bedroom, her bed. But every time she kisses Santana's skin and her lips stay connected for a while, she feels that sensation deep inside her. It goes through her nose to her brain and heart.

It anchors her.

The thought of Santana living at a new place, Brittany going away and the two of them not seeing each other for weeks makes her want to almost cry.

It felt so good to take care of Santana. To get taken care of by her, too.

But she's right. Santana doesn't need her. Not in that way. She'll have to live her life on her own.

But... does Santana not know that she's doing these things because she loves her? And not because she thinks it's a duty? Ok so they wouldn't live together if it wasn't for the fire but it's not the only reason she's doing these things for Santana. It's because she wants to.

Maybe she has to tell Santana? Lay it all out there? Although they said they should wait and take their relationship step by step?

What if it's too late once their ways separate for a while?

Brittany has no idea what to feel. She just knows that she's scared to make the wrong decision.

She puts her hand on Santana's side to feel her steady breath. She kind of hopes that Santana will wake up and they can talk again.

But Santana calmly sleeps in her arms. Just like she always does ever since their first night together.