Chapter Forty EIght

I hate that Valentines Day has to be on a work day. I had already planned to take some time off of work so that we could go somewhere very secluded or spend a lazy day at home but the office called me up and told me that they were having a problem with some of the tasks that I left them to deal with. I had explained that it was my day off and I wanted to spend the time with Kuon but they said I was needed to come in immediately.

In Kuon's own words, it can't be helped.

I hated to leave him and I wanted to protest to him that I didn't think I had hired anyone who would have problems functioning in their jobs at that level but he assured me it was okay. It scares me that he decided to come with me. I prefer it to him feeling alone at home but at home there's less that could hurt him. I come to the front desk with his hand in mine. He's done his best to hide the wounds with a large brimmed hat with a logo for Yashiro's company on it. He wasn't feeling too happy at his role here so it's good that we're going to go back together.

"Mrs. Hizuri, Kyoko," the young girl at the front desk says. I believe her name is Natalie. "Scott told me that you'd be in here today. I was supposed to hand you some…" she freezes as she turns to Kuon who just smiles at her gently. I put a hand on his chest protectively.

"H-How's…y-your d-ay…g-goi-ng?" Kuon asks in a shaky voice and the girl blushes.

"It's good," she squeaks out. I kiss Kuon's cheek and then wait for her to pass forward the files. "How's yours?" she asks still unable to look at Kuon. I can't blame her. He is beyond gorgeous. Even with the few disabilities he has, he seems godlike and I don't think that there's many capable of beating him.

"G-G-Good," he nods and I can see how hard he's trying even with people he's never met before. He's the same Kuon that he was before the accident. I knew it but this just proves it to me. He could be reserved and cold but instead he's trying to smile and engage in regular conversation. I look through the files before deciding where to start first. I put the file to my side and grab his hand.

"Happ—py V-Valen-ttines," he tells her as he gestures to a plush pig that's sitting in a gift bag with her name on a tag. She smiles and I look at him as he focuses on me again. I've been more focused on the abilities he's had and how far his speech has come, how he doesn't have to be in bed all the time anymore, how his handwriting has improved, how his appetite has changed. I never thought that his social skills would still be this way. I feel terrible for not giving him the credit he deserves.

"I have to talk to some people, are you okay sitting in the office?" I ask and he nods. I kiss his cheek before going to the conference room. I want to tell people I'm here and try to shorten the time between getting in here and getting out and celebrating Valentine's with Kuon.

"Wow, Kuon," Mark, one of the division leads says as I nod to him. Mark has been working with me for a very long time. A few years now. He was one of the people who pushed me to expand as quickly as I could and he's often gone out on double dates with us and his wife. "It's good to see you again, I missed ya."

Kuon nods and has a strained and introspective smile, "G-Go-dd to se-see you…tt-oo" he says and Mark grins, ignoring the way that Kuon speaks and looking at him as if nothing changed. "H-How…are y-y-you?"

"Doing pretty well but this show is going to be bigger than I thought, everyone is buzzing about the designs here. I think that your name appearing everywhere again has something to do with it," he winks. "You can't stop attracting the media, can you?"

"Well," I sigh, "Let's fix this so I can spend the day with my husband." Kuon gestures to my office and I shoot Mark a look saying that I'll be right back. I take Kuon's hand in my own and he gives another nod to Mark. I go into the office and grab a bottle of mineral water and the computer. I know it might sound insane but I have to check every inch of this room before I leave Kuon alone in it. He's improved so much but there is still that fear someone will try to kill him and this time he won't survive.

"Anything else that you need?" I ask him as I kiss his lips quickly.

"I'm…ffin-ne," he tells me and I hug him before slipping back.

"I'll be back as soon as possible. I love you."

"Llo-vve y-y-you tt-too" he tells me and I kiss him again. I look into those gorgeous emerald eyes. I can't help but remember how much I love him each time I look at him. I turn to leave. I love you Kuon.

KyKuKyKu

I feel that everyone is talking about me behind my back. I recently came out as Ren's girlfriend despite actually being Kuon's girlfriend and the confusion is worth being near him. I told Moko-chan that I wanted to make something epic for Kuon because he assured me that since he is taken, he will gladly accept anything which I give to him. I already made him a slightly embarrassing gift that I hope isn't too forward. It's a little figure of me, a good luck charm. I also made myself a Kuon one. I hope he doesn't laugh about it.

Would it be wrong to look at what other people have made and what the stores have in them before I decide on his gift. I hope it's okay with him that I also am making truffles again for all the people who have helped me and shown me kindness. Dark chocolate? Dark chocolate would probably be better than milk chocolate when it comes to Kuon. It's said to be easier to digest as well. Would he want something fancy because of his wonderful imagination or is it better to be safe and do something simple? What does that reflect on me if I just give him something plain and ordinary? Does that make me a plain boring woman?

I hear the sound of Yuka Sudo behind me. I worked with her during Box R. She coughs. "Kyoko-san?" she asks and I turn back to her with a smile and formally bow. She bows back but looks uneasy. "I wanted to ask for your permission."

"My permission?" I ask her and she blushes.

"I worked with Tsuruga-san on one of his dramas last year," she says awkwardly and I see her moving her foot. I hate to say that I don't know all of the actors that Kuon works alongside with, he has so many projects. I smile to her.

"Is that so? Was there a question that you'd like me to ask Ren-ku-san?" I ask as I blush. I find it really hard to not have any redness in my cheeks when calling him by that fake first name. If I started saying Kuon-kun then my heart might explode.

"Would you be okay with me giving him Valentines chocolates to say thank you for working with me and teaching me so much. I know that he's your boyfr-"

I pause before smiling. I don't want to tell her that Kuon won't be able to eat all of the chocolates and therefore might not eat hers. I can't believe that people are asking me for this. I laugh. Is this what it means to have a very famous boyfriend? "I'm sure he'll be happy to accept them," I tell her and she smiles with a sigh. I don't think I could get used to people asking someone like me for my permission when it comes to Ren. All I need to do is trust that Kuon loves me.

….

I feel weird as I look at the computer. There are so many people who love me. Of course, there are the critics too, people who probably wouldn't even care to get to know me but there are a lot more people who are rooting for me, talking about my appearance in a positive way, wishing me and my family luck after the accident. Everything to do with the US media is calling me Kuon Hizuri and talking about my achievements. People seem to generally think that I've been doing really well and have accomplished more than they thought that I even could.

I really do appreciate the support but it's the Japanese media that is making me feel awkward. On that page there are a lot of people who are trying to weigh who is better. Ren or Kuon. Seeing those pictures, both fashion photos of when I was younger so nothing like the tired and battered me but there are a lot of people who say I was better as Ren.

Ren wouldn't get himself in this type of situation. Ren is all about being a perfect gentleman who is skilled and talented in his work. Yes, there is a lot about Ren that is also true about myself. In fact, most of who I was under the surface was the same but it's like I'm looking at a stranger. This is who they want though. They don't want someone like me coming back to Japan, they just want this very classy and very sophisticated gentleman.

I sigh and see Kyoko enter the office with a heap of files in her arms. I smile to her weakly. I really hope that she doesn't see what I'm looking at. I didn't mean to cause her further harm. She puts the files down before seeing my face. "What happened?" she asks and I blink at her. "I'm sorry, I just have the feeling that something happened. I have the feeling that you're going to -"

"Lll-ookkk" I tell her as I grab her hand and she comes to take a look at the screen. She smiles as she looks at the pictures.

"Well, it is a pretty hard choice for them," she says as she kisses my cheek. "I mean, you might say that Ren Tsuruga was the fantasy and Kuon Hizuri is the reality but you know what," she takes the mouse and clicks to vote on Kuon Hizuri. "I am very happy with my reality. Don't tell me you spent the whole time in here Googling yourself," she grins and then sees my face. "Kuon?"

"The-they w-w-wantt…hi-mm" I tell her meaning that the Japanese people want Ren. I can't give them what they want. I can't magically become Ren Tsuruga again after all of these years. I feel nervous now. I was just expecting for it to be an easy move, I thought that the friends we had made back there would welcome us back but they don't want me, they want Ren. Kuon isn't good enough for them.

"Without Kuon Hizuri, there is no Ren Tsuruga," she tells me, "but when there is no Ren Tsuruaga, you are still sitting right here in front of me. That should tell you who is the stronger one. Besides, I see Ren in you every day. I'm just proud that there are so many similarities between the two of you," she tries to encourage me and I nod.

They want Ren. They don't seem to understand that Ren Tsuruga can't come back, at least not in the way he was before.

End of Chapter Forty Eight

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Thank you to the reviewers of Chapter Forty Seven

Kaname671, kyoko minion