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Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine, he is Kishimoto's
"Dattebayo!" - normal speech
'Dobe' – Thoughts
'{Shannaro!}' - Inner Sakura
"Ningen" - Boss Summon/Tailed Beast Speech
'Brat' - Boss Summon/Tailed Beast Thoughts
"Kage Bunshin!" - Ninjutsu/Genjutsu/Taijutsu move.
Beta'd by BigCC
Chapter 41: Terrible Tales of a Tortured Toad Sage
Second Day of the Second Round of the Chunin Exams
Myōbokuzan
"So, how does it look, Kashira?" Jiraiya asked. The Toad Sage was kneeling next to Fukasaku, who was examining the large formation of Fūinjutsu that he and his former apprentice had just sketched onto the floor of the large room they were in.
"Hmmm...it'll do." the elderly toad nodded after a moment. "But Jiraiya-chan, are you sure you want to do this? Trying something like this isn't going to end with one of your normal love-taps, you know. That lass is going to be right pissed when she gets here."
Jiraiya winced. Those 'love-taps' as the elder sage called them, were usually enough to send him flying into L.E.O.. Still, the Toad Sage nodded after a moment's grim contemplation. "I have to do this, Kashira, I owe my god-daughter this much at least. Hopefully, Tsunade will realize where she's been summoned and calm down before she can do too much damage. If nothing else, both you and Nee-san will be close enough to calm her down if things go too far. Even at her best, Hime couldn't beat the two of you at once without pulling out some desperate measures, and she hasn't been keeping up with her training nearly as much as she could have. Hopefully Shizune-chan will point that out to her."
"You're going to bring the apprentice here too?" the old Toad Sage asked his pupil.
"If I didn't, we wouldn't have a snowball's chance in hell of calming Tsunade down before she beats me to death." Jiraiya replied. "Shizune is one of the last remnants of Katō Dan and his family left; it's why Tsunade took her as an apprentice in the first place, or at least a big reason for it anyway. Leaving her behind would be a serious mistake, one I have no intention of making!"
"Why is it you can't be this astute with Senjutsu, Jiraiya-chan?" Shima sighed as she hopped into the room. "Tō-chan, I blame you for this. We didn't raise Jiraiya-chan properly!"
"Ah, shaddup." Fukasaku grumbled good naturedly. "Has Kōsuke arrived at Tsunade's location?"
"Yup. He's sittin' tight and waitin' for is the go-ahead from Katsuyu-chan." the other toad replied with a nod. "Gotta say, this ain't gonna be much of a fun thing to do. The trauma that girl Tsunade has ain't mild by any means."
"Having your lover bleed out in your arms tends to do that to a person." Jiraiya said with a forlorn sigh. Even after all the time that had passed since Katō Dan's death, Tsunade was still loyal to him, refusing to entertain the thought of any other lovers.
He had actually liked Dan, even in spite of them being rivals of sorts for Tsunade. The anguish his death had caused to his lover would likely have tormented Dan worse than the flames of hell itself, Jiraiya was certain. Dan had been a caring and compassionate man, who had been saddened by the number of people he had slain using his Reika no Jutsu (Spirit Transformation Jutsu). Had he lived, it was possible, even likely, that Namikaze Minato would've had a strong rival for the Hokage's Hat.
"True enough." Fukasaku agreed. "Well, we'd better get the ball rolling. On you go, Jiraiya-chan."
Nodding, the white-haired man knelt next to the fūinshiki and placed his hands on the two sections designed for it, beginning to funnel his chakra into the array as soon as his hands met ink and dirt. The seal formation quickly lit up as power thrummed through it.
Now all Jiraiya had to do was wait.
Same Time
Saikoro-Gai, Hi no Kuni Border
Senju Tsunade, granddaughter of the Shodaime Hokage, Slug Princess, one of the Legendary Three Ninja of Konoha and (the appellation that she liked least) the Legendary Sucker at Gambling, looked up abruptly as she pulled the lever of the one-armed bandit she was sitting at, her senses tingling as she detected...something.
"SUPER JACKPOT!" the machine boomed, Shizune cheering up as a positive deluge of tokens flooded out of the machine and into Tsunade's lap.
"Tsunade-sama, this is wonderful! Now we can pay back all of the debts that you racked up in the last week!" the usually quiet woman enthused. In her arms, the pink ninja pig Tonton let out an 'oink' of approval.
Shaking herself out of her stupor, Tsunade nodded sharply. "Shizune, you go and sort that out. I'm going to our rooms to pack. We have to get out of town right now!"
"H-Hai, Tsunade-sama." the apprentice realizing exactly what it meant for her mentor to have gotten a jackpot as opposed to nothing at all as was the usual. It meant that bad things were going to happen. The last time this had happened, an S-Rank Nuke-nin had tried to kidnap Tsunade. Luckily her mentor had been able to end the battle quickly and bloodlessly, using a quick-acting toxin she constantly carried on her person. Tsunade may have been a legend for her strength and healing ability, but she was also considered a rival of Suna's greatest poisoner, Chiyo of the White Sands, for more than her abilities to counter the other woman's poisons.
The cash that they had gotten from that fiasco was securely in Shizune's bank account, as Tsunade had felt guilty about the man almost breaking Shizune's neck during the opening moves of that fight.
Always nice to have an emergency fund to fall back on in case the debt collectors got too pushy.
A very quick fifteen minutes later and the two women (plus ninja pig) were heading out of Saikoro-Gai at a slightly brisk pace. Well, 'slightly brisk' for those with chakra training; to the regular civilians, they were practically running full tilt down the road.
"Where to, Tsunade-sama?" Shizune asked a handful of minutes into their run.
"The other side of Hi no Kuni." the older woman replied absently. Inside, she was cursing her sensei for making a condition of her freedom from the Shinobi Forces that she had to tell him far in advance if she planned to leave Hi no Kuni's borders for any length of time. To be fair, it was a very reasonable restriction and Tsunade rarely did leave her home country unless there was a particularly interesting gambling location just opened or a particularly bountiful offer had been made for her services as a healer.
Both women skidded to a halt at the sight of the red toad sitting in the middle of the road. Tsunade instantly recognized it as one of Jiraiya's messenger toads and wondered what her idiot of a perverted teammate wanted this time?
"Senju Tsunade, by order of the Hokage, you are requested and required to report to Konohagakure no Sato." Kōsuke said flatly. "Should you refuse, extreme measures will be taken to ensure your compliance."
A chill went down her spine at that. Her sensei was ending her wandering? No...she couldn't go back...not there...not to that place! To the home that had taken her precious brother and fiancé from her!
"I refuse!" Tsunade growled angrily.
"As you wish." the toad nodded sadly. "You've brought this on yourself."
When the toad vanished in a puff of smoke, clearly having returned to Myōbokuzan, Tsunade blinked in surprise. Then smoke surrounded her and when it cleared, the landscape around her was drastically different. Rather than the fairly open countryside of the Hi no Kuni/Kawa no Kuni borders region, she was surrounded in immense trees along with dozens of slugs of various sizes and shapes. She'd only ever been here once, but she knew this place well.
"...Shikkotsurin (Damp Bone Forest)?" she whispered in disbelief. "Why am I in the Slug Realm?!"
With another poof of smoke, Shizune and Tonton appeared next to her, looking disoriented. Of course, Shizune hadn't ever come here herself; Tsunade had allowed her sign a copy of the Slug Contract that she carried with her, just as Jiraiya carried a copy of the Toad Contract around with him, and the unlike the toads, the Slugs techniques were not something that could easily be taught to their summoners.
"Ts-Tsunade-sama, where are we?" her apprentice asked, standing in an easy ready stance in case of attack.
"Welcome to my home, Shizune-san." a familiar voice said and a single slug with very familiar markings landed in front of them.
"K-Katsuyu-sama?!" Shizune gaped. "Th-then this is Shikkotsurin? The legendary Summon Realm of the Slug Clan?"
"Indeed. It is very nice to finally have you here, Shizune-san." the Boss Summon of the Slug Clan replied warmly. A part of Tsunade idly noted that this must be a clone of some sort, as the real Katsuyu was at least the same size as Jiraiya's Gamabunta. "Sadly, this will only be a quick visit, as you both have somewhere else to be."
"Wh...you're helping Jiraiya!" Tsunade found her voice and accused her personal summon.
"The Toad Clan and the Monkey Clan both called in debts owed to them by me, Tsunade-sama. I am honour bound to aid them in this endeavour." Katsuyu apologized sincerely. "Even so, I would not normally have acted against your interests otherwise...however, it has been explained to me that this will be beneficial to you in the long run, so please at least try and listen to Jiraiya-sama before you punch him."
That shook the honey-eyed blond to her core. Never before had her personal summon disagreed with her or even slightly chastised her. What in the name of chakra was going on here?!
Before she could get another word out, a fūinshiki appeared around her and Shizune, once more warping them to another location. This time she had no clue where she was...at least until she saw that she was trapped in a barrier, linked to a circle of fūinjutsu, powered by a certain old Toad Sage.
She saw red.
"JIRAIYA!" she roared in a fury, ready to pounce forward and smash his skull in, only to find her feet seemed to be glued to the ground, or rather, to the seal painted onto it.
"Afternoon, Tsu-hime. You're looking well." the old reprobate had the nerve to grin. "And if it isn't Shizune-chan! You've gotten prettier since I last saw you!"
Shizune blushed tomato red at that. "Jiraiya-sama!"
"Still as shy and demure as ever, I see." Jiraiya chuckled slightly before becoming serious. "So, Tsunade, are you gonna listen to me or am I going to have to keep this seal up until you're willing to do so?"
Fists clenched, Tsunade glared at her teammate, but didn't move. If he had gone to all of the trouble of making such a large and complicated piece of fūinjutsu, then he was reasonably confident that it would hold her, even if she started whaling on it with her super-strength. Besides, she was slightly curious about what had made their mutual sensei go to all of the trouble of doing this to get her back.
"Fine." she huffed. "Start talking, and make it good, otherwise when I get out of here, I'll punch you into the stratosphere."
"That old hoary chestnut again." the Toad Sage huffed. "OK, put simply, Orochimaru's the leader of that new village, Otogakure. He's infiltrated the Chunin Exams and attacked the Uchiha brat, tried to put one of his Juinjutsu on him."
Tsunade scowled at the mention of her last and traitorous teammate. That he had founded a village wasn't much of a surprise (whatever his faults, Orochimaru had always been an ambitious and charismatic bastard with a forked, silver tongue), but attacking the Uchiha...that was troubling.
"That stupid obsession with ninjutsu..." she muttered.
"Right on the nose there Hime, you know how stubborn our dear old friend is." Jiraiya agreed sourly. "I've been getting updates from sensei, and it looks like he had to go out and personally drive Orochi off."
"Sarutobi-sensei did?" Tsunade was surprised. "Idiot old man. He should retire already..."
"He did. Minato's dead." the white-haired man said, a slight expression of pain on his face. Tsunade's heart twinged for him. She knew very well how he had seen Minato as the son he never had. "Anyway, Suna's also being suspicious; they've entered the Kazekage's youngest son, the Ichibi Jinchūriki, into the Chunin Exams without advanced warning. Likely, Suna and Oto have teamed up and are gonna invade Konoha a month from now."
Shizune gasped in horror, with Tsunade's eyes narrowing.
"And? What business is it of mine?" she asked coldly.
Huffing again, one of Jiraiya's hands blurred and a single folder, a Shinobi Registration file, landed at her feet. Tsunade looked down and froze at the name on the folder.
"Jiraiya...what kind of cruel joke are you trying to play here?" she asked raggedly, her vision beginning to cloud over in red rage.
"No joke. I wouldn't joke about your own family, Tsunade." her teammate replied calmly. "So I was right...you've thought she was dead for all these years."
Shizune timidly reached down and picked up the file and read the name aloud.
"Uzumaki Naruko..." the brunette blinked. "Uzumaki...as in the Uzumaki Clan? But...Tsunade-sama, I thought you said all of them had died almost thirteen years ago!"
"This is a trick, Shizune!" the Slug Princess snarled furiously. "A trick unworthy of you, Jiraiya! Kushina died after the Kyūbi was ripped from her, and her daughter followed suit! I saw the photos!"
"Photos? No photographs were taken of Minato and Kushina's bodies before being buried." Jiraiya frowned. "Only me, sensei, the Hokage Guard Platoon, a few members of the Council and a handful of trusted men and women in the Shinobi Forces ever saw their bodies. That picture had to have been a heavily doctored fake."
"Then do tell me why an ANBU would bring lies to me?!" Tsunade growled.
"This ANBU...were they blunt, unemotional and terse to the point of rudeness?" the Toad Sage asked pointedly. "If so, I think you know as well as I do that there's one person in Konohagakure who wants to keep you as far away from the village as is possible."
"Danzō." Tsunade whispered, her pupils shrinking in realization for a moment before she shook her head. "No, wait...that...that doesn't make sense. He's a war hawk! He wants a strong Konoha! Why would he deliberately twist things to keep an S-Rank kunoichi out of Konoha?"
"Because, Tsu-hime, whether you agree or not, you are the most likely successor to sensei with Minato gone." Jiraiya said bluntly. "Your bloodline, your ancestry, your pedigree, your S-Ranking, and the skill of your Iryō Ninjutsu are all in your favour, more so than a twisted, greedy and envious old man like Shimura Danzō could stomach being near the Hokage's Hat after the Day of the Kyūbi. He made and doctored the photo, had one of his Ne operatives deliver it to you and twist things so that your hatred of the village was at an all time high...keeping you away from Konoha for two very important reasons."
"Two?" Shizune asked with a blink.
"Yup." Jiraiya said laconically. "First, to keep a strong candidate for Hokage out of sight and out of mind. And second...to keep Uzumaki Naruko's only living and known blood relative away so he can try arrange things so she's put into his Ne program."
"Wha...wha..." Tsunade collapsed to her knees. "She's...alive? All this time, she's been alive?! And you NEVER TOLD ME?!"
"Any time I brought up Kushina or Naruko, you punched me across the horizon." Jiraiya deadpanned, giving her a flat glare. "That's what led to you being banned from three hotel chains across Hi no Kuni, remember? On several of those occasions, you punched me through one of their buildings."
Flushing bright red in embarrassment, Tsunade was still unable to believe that she had neglected her only living family for THIRTEEN YEARS without suspecting that it just might have been a lie!
'Then again, I wasn't in the best mental state at the time, and I'm woman enough to admit I've been I haven't been in a very long time.' the Med-nin thought grimly. 'I lost my idealistic streak, my ability to hope, years ago and I'm now more pessimistic than anything else. When that 'ANBU' arrived and told me about what happened...or what he SAID happened...I immediately accepted what I thought of as the worst case scenario for what happened on the Day of the Kyūbi without beginning to suspect a thing. Damn...'
"There's no proof of what you say is true, Jiraiya." she said aloud. "This folder could be doctored just like the pictures I saw were. For someone of your skills, with the cooperation of Konoha as a whole, it's more than possible."
"Possible, perhaps. Likely? Not really." Jiraiya shook his head. "The whole 'Big Lie' concept only works on the masses, Tsu-hime, not when you're dealing with singularly talented individuals like you and I. There's no doubt in my mind that you're going to double-check every fact I'm telling you for falsehoods after running DNA tests or infiltrating places you aren't supposed to or any other of a million and one ways you could find out about us lying to you. Trying a lie like that would result in a very short-term gain in exchange for a lot of long-term pain. Can you honestly think of anything that would force me and sensei to try something like that?"
And there was the reason why Jiraiya, a clanless shinobi of no particular bloodline, was such a dangerous person. He could play the fool so easily that it seemed natural to even the best observer, but when push came to shove that façade would drop and the razor-sharp, cunning mind behind would be revealed. Even Orochimaru hadn't been able to pierce it once Jiraiya had gotten some serious training in both combat and espionage under his belt. His ability to read people and predict reactions of any particular piece of information (or misinformation) on a particular person, group, or organisation was one reason that he was such an excellent spymaster for Konoha.
Tsunade was guilty of underestimating Jiraiya too, in the past. She still fell victim to it even now, much as it pained her to admit it, but when he was serious like this, she could only marvel at how far the former Dead Last of her small class had come in the many years since their time as Genin under Sarutobi Hiruzen.
"...you can let the seal drop now." the Slug Sannin sighed after a moment. "I'll at least read this file and question you about it before making any decisions."
"Smart girl." a croaking voice said as two small toads hopped into view, making Tsunade's eyes widen.
"Fukasaku-sama! Shima-sama!" she exclaimed in shock.
"Tsunade-sama?" Shizune blinked in surprise at the shock in her mentor's countenance.
"Shizune, those are Fukasaku-sama and Shima-sama, the Nidaisengama (Two Great Toad Sages), the heirs to Gamamaru, the Ōgama Sennin (Great Toad Sage)!" the Slug Princess explained quickly. "Individually, they are more powerful than Gamabunta and together, they are incredibly potent combatants. They are the ones who taught Jiraiya how to use Senjutsu."
The younger woman let out an 'eep!' of shock and immediately bowed deeply to the two toads, apologies for being rude tumbling from her lips.
"Hehe, calm down girl." Fukasaku chortled kindly. "We aren't well known aside from to the primary summoners of the more powerful contracts. Surprised Tsuna-chan here never told you about us before now, but I bet it's all that cheap booze that she's been bathing in for the last couple a' decades."
"I drink good booze, thank you very much." Tsunade retorted automatically.
"So ya say." Shima snorted. "Anyway, let's get movin' on, shall we? I've got some grub porridge for ya if you're hungry!"
"Thank you, but we ate before we left Saikoro-Gai." Tsunade hastily said as Jiraiya stopped channelling chakra into the fūinjutsu array, dropping the seal. In an instant, she was in front of him, fist drawn back and ready.
"Sen Mētoru Panchi! (Thousand Meter Punch!)" she hissed before slamming her fist, enhanced by her super-strength technique, into her teammate's stomach, sending him flying through the door behind him and out into the sky of Myōbokuzan.
"Didja have ta do that?" Shima asked dryly as her pupil sailed through the sky via Air Tsunade for the nth time in his life.
Huffing, the Slug Princess crossed her arms. "If you let him get away with doing it once without repercussions, then he'll do it again. That was barely a flick on the nose compared to what I'd have done if the idiot had actually managed to piss me off."
Fukasaku sweat-dropped at that. 'I can see why Jiraiya-chan is so hardy; takin' punches like that all the time is training in and of itself!'
The Next Day
Fukasaku and Shima's House, Myōbokuzan
As Jiraiya had been sent flying down Myōbokuzan's slopes, he'd needed some time to recover from almost falling down the entire mountain, so things had been delayed until the next day.
Tsunade lavished praise (in private) upon Shizune for having the foresight to have a couple of storage scrolls full of hot food, as it allowed them to avoid eating one of Shima's bug-filled stews.
She was sure that it tasted nice...to toads...but she was human and, thank you very much, unless she was really roughing it in the woods at the back end of beyond, Tsunade preferred not to eat grubs, bugs or insects of any description.
She was sitting cross-legged on the floor, with Naruko's Shinobi Registration File open in front of her and Shizune reading everything as she sat next to her, and the Slug Sannin's anger was once again aroused with what she had read thus far.
Broken, bruised, crushed and fractured bones, a whole host of minor poisonings running the gamut from minorly embarrassing to modestly severe, cuts, bruises, bruised organs, stab wounds...the sheer number of injuries that her cousin had gone through in the first eleven years of her life outstripped that of a shinobi who had gone through one of the Great Shinobi Wars.
"Dear kami-sama, how can one village be full of so much hate and stupidity?" she growled aloud. "And this is the place that you want me to return to?!"
This last was addressed towards Jiraiya, who was nursing his stomach. It wasn't every day that Tsunade unleashed one of her punches into it, and he had been caught off guard, only just managing to reinforce his abdomen with chakra in time to stop her from splattering his guts across Myōbokuzan.
"When was the last time you saw and felt one of the Nine Bijū going on a rampage, hmm?" Jiraiya snarked at her. "I arrived an hour after it was all over and I could still feel the sheer hate of the Kyūbi's remnant chakra on everything that thing touched. That affected the psyche of those who survived, the civilians at least. A lot of people moved out of Konoha afterwards, but we have a solid group who are determined to 'punish the Demon Bitch' in the name of my best student, clearly against his wishes."
The anger and grief in his voice made Tsunade very tempted to find one of those people and punt them across Hi no Kuni.
Forcing herself to continue reading, she asked absently, "Do you think Danzō had something to do with that as well?"
"Better than even chances." the Toad Sage said sourly. "The man would just love to get Naruko into Ne and make her a good little clockwork soldier, though it would backfire on him. According to sensei, Kushina left a letter for Naruko telling her that feeling love is what allows the Jinchūriki to hold back the malevolence of the Kyūbi's chakra; an emotion-broken drone would be corrupted and release the Kyūbi faster than an Akimichi eating their way though a bowl of peanuts."
"So by staying away from Danzō, she's saving the old fool's life...how ironic." Tsunade snorted. Then she stilled as she came to the page that detailed a certain incident involving an Uchiha and a hollow, poison-filled, tantō. She read it, paused and then read it again. Then she re-read it again for a fourth time. And again. Nope, it still didn't make sense.
"Jiraiya, what incompetent idiots are working in the hospital nowadays?" she demanded abruptly, waving the page at him. "This is the most illogical and outright stupid medical diagnosis that I've read outside of one written by an idiot who was drunk out of his mind and self-medicating!"
"I thought that might get your interest." Jiraiya nodded. "From what I gathered over my time with you, this diagnosis of poison remnants in her womb didn't sound plausible to me, yet every single doctor at the hospital agrees with it. I carefully checked and there's an incredibly subtle Genjutsu affecting every single one of the doctors at the hospital."
"Why go through all of this trouble though? Why make her seem sterile?" Tsunade asked with a confused frown. "I'd have thought that Danzō would have tried to get her into the Clan Restoration Act to make more Uzumaki."
"Even the old War Hawk likely knew that he had less than a snowball's chance in hell of getting sensei to allow that to pass." Jiraiya snorted. "Likely he wanted to make her a good little soldier before making her 'volunteer' to go through with it."
"The doctors I can see being hit with a mass genjutsu, but there are many more nurses and med-nin than there are civilian doctors, so how did this get by them?" Tsunade demanded. "One person couldn't hit the entirety of both the Nursing Corps and the Iryō Nin Division without running out of chakra!"
"Med-nin rarely work in the hospital, save for shifts to keep their certifications and any remedial training they need." Jiraiya said absently. "And you're right about the sheer size of the Nursing Corps. So let's assume that the nurses, save for a few in key positions, are unaffected by our hawk-like friend. There are two ways that I can think of that allows Danzō to pull this off; One, he intercepts and fudges the results according to his plan. Two, he has something that can cause poison to appear in Naruko's womb at will so he has no need to fudge the results."
"The first would be fairly hard for him to accomplish so many times over the years." Tsunade remarked almost clinically as she eyed the number of times a test for poison in Naruko's womb had been conducted; almost monthly. Given that the Kyūbi's chakra had apparently healed her of all other poisons that she had been drugged with, it must have made Sarutobi-sensei suspicious when this particular one showed no signs of fading. "That leaves the latter. I don't know of any medical devices that could do this yet with current technology. What about seals? Are there any that could be used to transfer poison into Naruko?"
"There are several." Jiraiya nodded grimly. "But they all require a point of origin and a point of exit marked by fūinjutsu. This means that there has to be a seal carved onto the inside surface of her womb to act as the point of exit. In other words, she had to have been missing for at least several hours while she was opened up, the seal placed, and then everything healed back to normal."
Shizune blanched. "Kami...would this Danzō character really go so far as to do that to a young girl?"
"He is willing to do literally anything to achieve his goals, Shizune-chan." Jiraiya said with a dark scowl. "He wants to corrupt the Shodaime's dream and twist it into his own image of what it should be. Unfortunately, all of this is barely even the most circumstantial of evidence; it's speculation, pure and simple. Publicly attacking Danzō with this would be political suicide, given how much favour he's curried with the Fire Daimyo."
"I hate politics." Tsunade growled.
"Why do you think I made myself invaluable as a spymaster?" the Toad Sage smirked at her.
"One day Jiraiya, you will make me punch you straight to the moon." the Slug Princess informed him with a twitching eyebrow.
"I look forward to it." Jiraiya replied. "So long as you get your lovely keister back to Konoha to do so."
Tsunade grumbled, but nodded. Now that she knew that she had a living relative, one that she'd been tricked into abandoning for thirteen years to boot, in Konoha, a herd of wild horses couldn't keep her away. She owed that to Kushina.
'And once I have enough evidence to get Danzō stripped of all of his positions and power, I will literally punch his head off of his crippled and wizened body!' she swore fiercely.
"Before we go back, we have to get you back into fighting shape, Tsu-hime." Jiraiya said seriously, breaking her from her brooding. "You may be good enough to handle the average punk, but you've not kept your training up seriously. When was the last time you practised anything but Iryōjutsu?"
"Too long." the busty blond admitted tiredly, rolling her shoulders. She was willing to admit she'd been coasting for a long time, but now that she had a goal (and a target in need of a violent, painful death) it was time to get back to work.
"Sensei wanted you back by the end of the Second Round, which is the day after tomorrow." Jiraiya said with a nod. "So we spend most of today and tomorrow getting you back up to snuff, and then head to Konoha the day after to meet with sensei. You may even see Naruko fighting in the Third Round Preliminaries, if enough people manage to pass the Second Round."
"You sound confident that she'll pass." Tsunade raised an eyebrow.
"Lemme tell you later about her first and second C-Ranks." the old Toad Sage laughed. "She inherited Kushina's luck when it came to them, I'll tell you."
"Gods..." the Slug Sannin shook her head. That would be interesting to hear about. The only time Tsunade had met up with Kushina (accidentally) after a C-Rank, she'd just fought a giant sea monster of some kind during a C-Rank mission to investigate strange goings on in a sleepy seaside village on Hi no Kuni's eastern coast.
Shizune just blinked in surprise before shrugging. She'd only vaguely heard of Uzumaki Kushina's infamous status as someone who unearthed conspiracies, plots and monsters on her C-Ranks, but she was certain that the truth was stranger than the fiction.
The Next Day
Open Training Grounds, Myōbokuzan
"Katon: Karyū Endan!" Jiraiya unleashed three dragons of fire from his mouth, aimed right at Tsunade, who leaped into the sky and dropped down at him.
"Tsūtenkyaku! (Heaven Kick of Pain!)" she shouted, aiming her left leg at where Jiraiya was standing.
"Ohshit!" the Toad Sage leapt out of the way, hand already flashing through handsigns as his teammate slammed into the ground, creating a very large crater in it.
"Ninpō: Yaseigami! (Ninja Art: Crazy Hair!)" At Jiraiya's command, his long white hair lashed out, sending Tsunade flying with its steel-strength density.
'I hate that jutsu.' Tsunade thought in annoyance as she flipped over, landed on her feet and shot back towards Jiraiya. She raised her fist and slammed it onto the ground in front of him, making him fly up into the air.
"Gokuraku Jōdo! (Paradise Pure Land!)" she growled as she slammed her fist into Jiraiya...or rather the log he had replaced himself with, shattering it into a hail of splinters and kindling.
A distinctive tearing whine in the air alerted her to what was about to happen. One of the two techniques that made his student Namikaze Minato such a terror on the battlefield...
"Rasengan! (Spiralling Sphere!)" The Toad Sage roared as he smashed the ball of condensed chakra into her stomach. She'd been hit with it before and it had hurt like a sonofabitch then. Now it was just as sore!
"I think that's enough for th' moment, kids." Fukasaku said dryly as Tsunade flipped head over heels and landed, wincing as she placed her hand on the point of impact and started to heal herself.
Shizune and Shima joined them as the two Sannin stopped their little spar and made their way back to the others. It was the fourth in the last two days, and Tsunade was disgruntled enough to admit that, while neither of them had been fighting all out, she had been distinctly holding the short-stick in all of them.
'I've let my situational awareness rot to hell and back.' she thought grimly. 'Even ten years ago, I would have reacted faster to that last Rasengan. Tch. Ageing sucks.'
She had grown complacent, she had to face the fact. Faced with only the very, very occasional S-Rank Missing Ninja who thought of her as a taijutsu specialist first and foremost rather than an Iryō-nin, as well as a whole posse of weakling debt collectors, she had slackened off and her skills in combat, as well as her physical condition, had degraded accordingly. Her Iryōjutsu skills hadn't declined in the slightest, and she was already in the process of using them to restore her muscles to their peak. By the time she was in Konoha, she'd be back to something close to the best physical condition she could be in.
"I think more sparring wouldn't help much." Jiraiya was saying, so she forced herself out of her musing to listen to him. "We'd better focus on getting our information in line...oh?"
Kōsuke was hopping towards the group, a scroll on his back. The Toad Sage snagged it off of his back as the messenger toad went by and rolled it out. Reading it for a moment.
"Good news! Naruko's team made it to the Tower in the middle of the Forest of Death." he announced cheerfully. "Sensei says that Team 8 are bruised and battered, but still in one piece. They're asleep right now, and have been for a while. Getting attacked by Orochi on top of the usual pleasantness of the Forest of Death will do that to a person, I guess."
"Especially if they're just genin." Shizune nodded sympathetically. "I hope that they weren't too badly hurt..."
"Sensei'll want to explain that in person." Jiraiya said with a sigh. "Let's just say it's a good thing that she's a Jinchūriki and leave it at that for the moment, hmm?"
"How're we going to get to Konoha anyway?" Tsunade asked, restraining herself from smacking him one for keeping more secrets. "If Shizune and I are reverse-summoned back to where we came from, we'll be almost a week away from the village."
"I'll be takin' care of that, hon." Shima said with a nod. "I'll head to Konoha via the Transport Well and reverse-summon you from there."
"I thought that only the Slugs could summon me." Tsunade blinked.
"Katsuyu-chan gave us temporary permission to summon and reverse-summon you twice." Fukasaku informed her. "Jiraiya-chan had to make a temporary contract scroll to do it, but it works, linking the Toad and Slug Contracts for a while."
"How the hell...?" Tsunade just stared at her teammate in disbelief.
Jiraiya was smug. "Fūinjutsu, Tsu-hime. It's all kinds of awesome that way. Kind of like me."
"Build a bridge and get over yourself." Tsunade rolled her eyes. Trust Jiraiya to start bragging about himself. Honestly, he hadn't changed in that way since they had been genin.
"Thing're gonna be interestin' in Konoha with these two there." Fukasaku mentioned to Shima quietly. "Don't you think so, Kaa-chan?"
"Yup." the Mother of the Toad Way nodded with a smile. "Gonna be interestin' ta say the least."
The Next Day
Roof of the Hokage Tower, Konohagakure
Shima slammed her hand down on the floor. "Kuchiyose no Jutsu!"
With an explosion of smoke, Jiraiya, Shizune and Tsunade appeared in front of her. Shizune was smiling happily. It had been years since she had been home, and she was glad to see that Konoha hadn't changed much in the time she had been absent. She had just been a young girl when she left, and her memories were fuzzy, but it all felt so familiar.
Tsunade, on the other hand, was looking up mournfully at the Hokage Monument, specifically at the carved faces of her grandfather and granduncle. Two people she had loved, taken from her by war and the position of Hokage.
Senju Hashirama had spoiled her rotten and had been her beloved grandfather. Senju Tobirama, while not as personable or as kind as his brother, had still loved her and treated her well. He'd had a hard time expressing his emotions, but the little things, like brushing her hair as a little girl and giving her the sweets she loved on a regular basis, had shown her that he truly cared for her. To lose both of them for the same reason, their duty as Hokage...it had been a pair of serious blows.
That had been the start of her disillusionment with Konoha and the Kage system, which had been completed by the deaths of Senju Nawaki, her precious little brother, and Katō Dan, her fiancé. She had left Konoha after that and sworn never to return.
'And now here I am, Ojī-chan, Ojī-sama.' Tsunade thought sadly. 'Back in the place that you gave your lives to protect.'
"You OK, Tsunade?" Jiraiya asked softly.
"Yeah...it's just...the memories...aren't pleasant." the Last Senju replied with a forlorn sigh. "I swore I'd never come back here, to this place that represents everything I've lost."
"I think Shodaime-sama and Nidaime-sama are happy to see you again." Jiraiya said, with a nod towards the Hokage Monument, which had bright sunlight playing across the stone faces of Hashirama and Tobirama, as if welcoming her back after so long away.
Scoffing slightly, Tsunade nevertheless smiled slightly. "I'm back." she muttered before turning to Jiraiya. "Let's go. I want to see sensei as soon as possible."
"Got it." the Toad Sage nodded.
Turning to Shizune, the Slug Princess fished a key out from between her cleavage and handed it to her apprentice. "This is the key to the old Senju Estate. Unlocking the doors should activate the auto-cleaning seals that my great-uncle placed on the place, so there shouldn't be that much to do there, but give the place a thorough once-over just in case."
"Hai, Tsunade-sama." Shizune nodded, taking the old-fashioned key. "Should I do some grocery shopping for dinner tonight?"
"Yes. I'll send a message if we're delayed or something." the blond kunoichi replied. "Jiraiya, lead on."
With that, after bidding farewell to Shima, the two Sannin vanished in a pair of smoke clouds, using the Shunshin to move rapidly to their destination, the Tower of the Forest of Death.
As Jiraiya was not someone who forgot secrets once he knew them, he led them to the entrance/exit to the Tower's outside exit with reassurance. The guards, a pair of chunin who gaped at the sight of two of the three Sannin, let them both by without a word. The irritating little confusion fūinjutsu that was present inside the tunnel was irksome, but after two decades of hangovers, Tsunade found it easy to ignore.
"They've renovated the place some." she noted to Jiraiya as she eyed the inside of the tower itself. It had formerly been just stone inside, with torches and stone lamps fuelled by oil set into the walls, the typical sort used in the Warring Clans Era. Now it was just as modern as any modern fortified base that Tsunade had seen.
"We started using this place for the Chunin Exams a few years before the Day of the Kyūbi. The first time was...irritating due to the lack of modern conveniences we've gotten used to having." Jiraiya sighed. "Minato personally took charge of upgrading the building to modern standards afterwards. The brat was rather proud of himself for that; did it in half the time, with everything under budget."
"Getting anything done under-budget is a miracle, Jiraiya." the Slug Princess informed him. "Especially for a renovation project."
"Meh. This is why I don't own property myself. Too much fuss and feathers." the Toad Sage mock shuddered at the idea. Then he tilted his head to one side, listening. "Sounds like the Third Round Prelims are still going on. Let's go see what's shaking."
"'What's shaking'? You're trying to be too damned cool." Tsunade scoffed but followed him to where she vaguely recalled the central arena to be. When the Tower had originally been built, it had been designed as a massive trap, where invaders who entered were to be funnelled to and killed using a barrage of shuriken, kunai and jutsu from above, not that it was ever used for its intended purpose. Now, it was an arena to test potential chunin. How times change.
"Go on." Jiraiya said as he gestured to the doors.
Throwing him a suspicious look, Tsunade walked forward and opened the door a crack, peering through, and the sight made her eyes widen.
"Uzumaki Taijutsu Ōgi: Kai: Rasentenkyaku!"
The one doing the shouting was a girl with long red hair tied into a ponytail, wearing a one-sleeved red trench coat with a black belt over one shoulder. She wore two hitai-ate, the leaf symbol of Konoha on her forehead, with the swirl of Uzu on her sleeveless arm. As Tsunade numbly watched, the girl spun into a living drill, very reminiscent of the Inuzuka's Gatsūga jutsu, and slammed into the body of her opponent like a thunderbolt.
Said opponent started spinning quickly for a moment before the girl leapt off of him, starting to slow her spin down. The flash of her face that Tsunade saw -a wide smirk full of confidence, smugness and defiance, framed by three whisker-like scars and with a pair of sapphire blue eyes peeking over a button nose- told her everything she needed to know.
This was Uzumaki Naruko...her cousin.
Hastily closing the door, the Slug Sannin surreptitiously wiped her eyes clean and turned to Jiraiya, his face sporting a half-smirk. A very annoying and smug half-smirk.
Reflexively, she lashed out with a punch and sent him flying down the corridor. The venerable Toad Sage, long wise to his female teammate's habit of hitting first and apologising through gritted teeth later, had reinforced his body with chakra as soon as she turned around. Spinning in the air, his geta made a slight grinding sound as he skated to a halt.
"Idiot." Tsunade huffed. "Let's go wait in the Tower's Hokage Office. It should be a level up if Minato or sensei haven't changed things."
Unsurprisingly, it was indeed where Tsunade thought it was. There, the two Sannin waited for a couple of minutes before Sarutobi Hiruzen walked into the room. Tsunade found herself studying her old sensei thoroughly in the brief moment before he noticed her. He had gotten a lot older-looking since she'd last seen him; lines of grief and sorrow had etched themselves into his face, and there was no sign of his original hair colour in his beard.
Yet despite that, there was still the same sense of power and purpose in his stride and stance that she'd always sensed in him. Old or not, weary or not, this was still the Third Shinobi God that she was in the presence of.
"Tsunade-chan...!" the Third Hokage breathed in surprise and welcome. "Welcome home. Let me have a look at you..."
Walking forward and peering into her eyes, he smiled. "You've regained some of your inner fire, my student. It has really been too long since I've seen you."
"Sensei..." Tsunade rasped out, the emotions almost too much for her. "I...I'm...so sorry...I should have come back earlier...I'm so sorry about Biwako-sama..."
"Shh. There can be talks about what regrets are left and what we have lost later." Sarutobi said firmly. "What is important is that you are back in Konoha and that you are no longer alone."
"Hai..." the kunoichi nodded. Why was it that this man still made her feel like a genin again, even after over forty years? "Sensei...about Naruko..."
"She will be happy to see you, my dear." the old Kage smiled. "Let us move this conversation to my office in the Hokage Tower; the security there is better suited for such talks than here."
Instead of leading them to the exit, Sarutobi pressed a seemingly random block on the wall and pulsed some chakra into it, which made an insanely complex seal to appear on the floor, which Jiraiya recognised.
"Is that Minato's version of the Hiraishin?!" he exclaimed.
"A fixed location version that he adapted from the Hokage Guard's Hiraijin no Jutsu (Flying Thunder Formation Jutsu)." the Hokage agreed. "Specifically set up so that it goes from here to the office only if no one is sitting in the Hokage's seat. He decided that it was more efficient to have one set up here so he could go back to work as soon as the Second Round was over. Step lively now, it'll vanish if no one uses it for a minute after activation."
Once all three stood on it, the array flashed and they found themselves standing in the middle of the Hokage's office in the Hokage Tower. With a sigh, Sarutobi crossed to his desk and sat down in the chair behind it, removing his hat and activating the room's security seals as he did so.
"So then, you've been informed of Naruko's existence and status? Good." he said after a moment. "I passed a law stating that no one is to speak of her status as the Kyūbi Jinchūriki to anyone who is unaware of it. Keep that in mind, if you please."
"If that was supposed to help protect her, then it failed dramatically, sensei." Tsunade scowled. "I've seen war veterans who've received fewer wounds!"
"Yes...you are correct." the Hokage admitted sadly. "Take heart in that the injuries haven't been unavenged. I've yet to see the full numbers, but it would seen that almost eighty percent of those who attacked Naruko-chan have died for one reason or other. The other twenty percent have either fled Konoha or are in prison. Now, I am eager to hear what you've diagnosed from Naruko's medical history, especially regarding her poison problem."
The rant he received from Tsunade regarding the impossibility of Naruko's condition, coupled with Jiraiya inserting some information about a genjutsu on his medical personnel, made Sarutobi scowl, deactivate the security measures and snap his fingers, making three ANBU appear.
"Inu, Tori, take a squad of ANBU specialising in genjutsu detection and visit every doctor on the register. I want every person under the influence of a genjutsu identified, and the genjutsu broken if possible." he ordered.
As the dog- and bird-masked ANBU vanished, Sarutobi turned to the last one left. "Neko, kindly bring Naruko-chan to me once she exits the Tower's tunnel. It's time and past time that she meets her family."
"Hai, Hokage-sama." Neko nodded, and the purple-haired ANBU vanished to follow his bidding, leaving Tsunade looking worried.
"I left her alone to face the wrath of the idiots in the village for so long..." the Sannin fretted. "What if she wants nothing to do with me?"
"Naruko isn't someone to be moved by that kind of resentment...at least not a lot." Sarutobi stated firmly. "She's likely to be far more interested in finally having a blood relation in her life. Be honest and upfront with her and things will go fine. I would prefer it if the matter to do with her...womb...is left alone for the moment until we can more properly examine the situation in detail. And try not to discuss Danzō's possible involvement either; the last thing we need is for her to attack the man and demand to know what he though he was playing at...as amusing at it might be to watch."
"Always wanted to see someone punch that old bastard out." Jiraiya mused. "Minato didn't like him much either, but he was too new to office to do anything to remove him from the council. Another few years and he would've done."
"The Advisors should have been changed as well; Koharu and Homura have been advisors for decades without rest and we need new blood and modern perspective in the advisor's chairs." Sarutobi mused. "Something for my next successor to think about."
Tsunade threw a sharp look at her sensei before schooling her face into neutrality as a knock came from the door.
"Hokage-sama? I have brought Genin Uzumaki, as requested." Neko's voice said from the other side of the door.
"Thank you, Neko-san." the Third said, replacing his hat on his head. "Send her in please and stay on guard outside to ensure we are not interrupted."
The Slug Sannin let out a small breath as the door opened. It was time.
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Next Chapter: Training, Trouble and Unexpected Guests
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