The good news is, I got an email from my course instructor this afternoon informing me that due to the current state of events, we've all been given a two week extension on the assignment that was originally due this Friday and would have potentially hindered me from updating. The better news is, I finished this chapter this afternoon.
Chapter 32
"Are we there yet?" Imogen asked from the back seat for what must have been the thousandth time since we got on the road twenty minutes ago. She'd been almost insufferably excited all morning, waking before dawn and ensuring that everyone else was also awake and aware of the fact that today was The Day. She'd been looking forward to this trip since Brandon told her about it, her excitement growing exponentially by the hour as it approached. She'd made lists, and plans, and talked non-stop about it for the last week. She'd been completely dressed with her hair done and shoes on at five o'clock this morning when she jumped on top of her father's softly snoring form to wake him up. The following three hours had been an exercise in delay tactics until it was an appropriate time to leave.
I shifted in my seat, peering at the girl over my shoulder. "Not yet," I said, fighting back a yawn. I hadn't slept well the last few nights, and this morning's early wake up call was not helping matters. There wasn't enough coffee in the world to wake me up at this point. Not that I'd been allowed any in the last few weeks.
"Another ten minutes," Brandon explained, sending Imogen a smile in the rearview mirror. "Why don't you start putting your sunscreen on?"
I sighed and returned my head to the window where it had been resting for most of the trip. The vibration against my forehead was simultaneously soothing as it loosened the tension in my body, and annoying as bumps in the road occasionally thrust my head away from the hard surface, resulting in a mild knock to the temple. If I emerged from the car without a bruise on my face I'd be surprised.
"You okay?" Brandon asked quietly as Imogen went back to singing loudly in the back seat. "You look pale."
"I'm always pale," I mumbled, keeping my eyes closed against the jiggling vision the window induced.
"You haven't been your usual bubbly self the last few days," he insisted, laying a concerned hand on my arm. "You're not getting sick, are you?"
Shrugging his hand off, I brought my feet up onto the edge of the seat so that I was curled into the foetal position, resting my head on my knees rather than the window. "I'm fine," I said, attempting a reassuring smile when he glanced over at me. "Just tired. I haven't been sleeping well."
"Your energy will likely return when we get there," he said. "Adrenaline is like that."
Adrenaline, just happened to be part of the reason I'd only gotten three hours of sleep last night. Adrenaline and anxiety. I'd checked and double checked the arrangements for today to make sure I knew it all by heart. I didn't want to be caught in a moment of hesitation or uncertainty and end up doing something stupid. I need to be absolutely deliberate in my movements. Anxiety, nervousness and lack of attention to detail lead to mistakes, and I couldn't afford mistakes today.
Ten minutes later we pulled into the vast parking lot and circled three times before making do with a park that was a three-minute walk from the entrance. I was surprised by the number of people already flocking toward the gates and cueing outside to get in, but at the same time, it was a comfort to know that there would be literally hundreds of people surrounding us all day. There's a certain anonymity that comes from a crowd that lends a modicum of confidence when faced with a difficult task. Maybe this would be easier than I thought.
"We're here!" Imogen exclaimed the second Brandon pulled the handbrake. "We're here! We're here! We're HEEEERRRREEEEE!" her voice was a like a knife to the skull in my current state, but I did my best to hide my reaction. I didn't need Brandon's concern driving him to pay more attention to me than usual. I needed to pull up my big girl panties and fake it till I made it. Diversion tactics.
Brandon grinned at me, Imogen's excitement having rubbed off on him over the course of the morning, and unbuckled his seat belt. "Let's get this show on the roll!" he enthused, thrusting open the door and meeting his daughter on the pavement beside the car. They were both jumping up and down. I was exhausted just looking at them. I hoped that adrenaline Brandon promised would kick in soon, because I was not going to make it through this trial otherwise.
"Let's go!" I heard Imogen cry from the other side of the car as I hauled myself out of the front passenger seat. "Let's go! Let's GO!"
"One minute, monkey," Brandon stalled, opening the boot of the car and hauling out three backpacks and handing one to Imogen and the next to me as I reached the back of the car. "We need to make sure we have everything before we go in. Ready?" He unzipped his own backpack and Imogen and I followed diligently. This was the routine. This was what was expected. This was what he needed to do before we got on with the day's events."
"Shouldn't we have done this before we left?" I asked pointedly.
"We did," Brandon said. "But we need to double check."
"Yeah!" Imogen agreed.
Brandon then proceeded to take stock of his backpack, calling out each item and waiting for Imogen and I to confirm that we both had them in our own as well. It was tedious. It did nothing for my nerves. It did nothing to induce that adrenaline rush Brandon had mentioned. "Okay, we're ready," he announced once the last item was catalogued. "Let's go line up."
"I wanna go on the rollercoaster first," Imogen announced, swinging from my hand as we walked across the car park.
"I thought we'd start with the train ride around the park," Brandon countered seriously, pulling out the map and program he'd printed earlier in the week for planning purposes. He had a tendency to approach all endeavours like they were a government mission: gathering intelligence, planning for all eventualities, striking with precision. "That way we get the lay of the land, scope out the length of some of the ride lines, familiarise ourselves with some of the landmarks and pick out a meeting point."
Imogen groaned in protests, reaching out to grab my hand as well, tugging lightly to get me to voice my opinion on the matter.
"I agree," I said, smirking down at the child. "A train ride sounds great."
"Muuuum," Imogen whined, dragging back on both our hands now. "Rollercoasters! You said you wanted rollercoasters, not trains!"
Brandon's self-satisfied smile kicked up a little more at the corners to hear that I agreed with him. I'd been siding with Imogen all week, advocating for the more exciting rides over sedate train rides and sitting in the audience at a show. Excitement was a much better distraction than dancers and foam costumes. But I was tired, and my stomach was rolling with nausea, so the thought of jumping straight on a rollercoaster, now that it was a very real possibility, did not bode well for the fate of the toast I'd eaten for breakfast.
"Mum's just feeling a little under the weather this morning," Brandon placated our daughter, hoisting her up onto his shoulders. "She'll be back up to thrill rides after a nice, relaxing train ride, I'm sure."
I wasn't sure the train ride would make much of a difference, given the fact that I knew exactly why I was feeling under the weather this morning, but I didn't protest as we joined the end of the very long line. I just nodded benignly and turned around to memorise where the car was parked for later.
*o*
I breathed a sigh of relief as I pulled into the train station parking lot and immediately spotted Jacques waiting by the stairs. I was on the home stretch. My new life was so close I could almost taste it: it tasted like croissants and baguettes. Weeks of anticipation and skulking around, and I was finally here. Finally on the cusp of the happily ever after I'd been dreaming off.
I parked as close to the stairs as possible, minimising the distance we'd have to carry my bag as much as I could, and grinned when Jacques met me at the back of the car. Thank god I'd had the forethought to stop and dump out the child seat and all Imogen's toys and books. "Ready?" he asked, dropping a light kiss on my cheek as he opened the boot, revealing the single duffle bag I was able to afford myself. It was all that would fit in the spare tire compartment, even with the tire itself removed. "That's not much to show for a life lived up until the age of 30," he commented.
"I'm using this opportunity to downsize," I informed him. In truth, it was all I could bring with me without raising Brandon's suspicion. He noticed everything tiny little detail, so I'd been lucky. He hadn't noticed the changes in my body, and he hadn't noticed the gaps in the wardrobe we shared. Probably, he had noticed my absence by now though. "Besides, less stuff means less to carry."
"That's a good point," Jacques agreed, hefting the bag out of the car and onto the pavement. "Will your car be okay here?" he asked.
I nodded. "My cousin is gonna pick it up later," I lied. "She's buying it for her son."
"Good," he said, wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me in close. "Now that the business is out of the way, let me greet my new fiancé properly." And with that he sealed both our mouths together for several breathtaking minutes, raising my temperature to dangerous heights before pulling back abruptly and kneeling down to give special attention to my stomach which, thankfully, had never quite lost its pooch after Imogen's birth. "I can't wait to meet our little peanut," he crooned, giving it one last kiss before straightening and dragging both me and my bag up the stairs to our bright new future.
*insert something witty and/or inspiring to say at the end of the chapter here*
