Chapter Fifty Four

I jolt awake as I hear a loud crashing sound like something breaking. It takes a second for my brain to register what is happening before I see the shadow at the window. Kuon. Kuon's alive. I feel the breeze from the open window and then look around questioningly. Kuon's hair is slightly longer, the brown has faded quit a bit, and he looks thinner. His arm on his left side has gone limp but he's just staring out the window.

"Corn?" I ask as I go over to him and he stares out the window.

"Too damn light!" he snaps at me and I take a step back as I blink through the darkness. There is a soft light from the hallway but the light in this room isn't on. "People need things too damn bright!" he says before laughing in a cold manner. "They should get used to the darkness. Most people live in the darkness. It's only natural to live in the darkness. These people…they take everything for granted."

I cover my mouth as I yawn and then my eyes widen as he follows those words with a string of curses. I'm surprised that even with the torture that they put him through, his voice has improved, his speech has improved. I walk over to him before feeling something sharp on the bottom of my shoe. I reach down and touch the broken glass. Broken glass?

I move close to him and wrap my arms around him. He struggles for a moment before wrapping his right arm around me. He was using his left arm last night. I hear people out by the window, late night attendants and look out. They've turned an outside light on as well as flashlights and I can see that the window in Kuon's room isn't open, it's broken and the lamp from the hospital room has broken on the ground directly below. I blink confused.

"They want to trap me here, Kyoko," he says as I hear Father trying to come to terms with what might be happening. "I can't leave. They want to trap me. I'm sorry," he apologizes again with a bowed head and I feel the tears as he holds me, gripping me a little too much but I wonder if he actually knows this. "They want to hurt me." He tells me and I hear a couple of nurses from the hallway. The light is turned on and I look to see that a table and chair have been flipped over. I return my eye contact to Kuon's face and push my hand through his beard.

"Corn," I try to comfort him since he looks so broken and empty. "They don't want to hurt you, they're worried about you. If you don't feel safe here then maybe we can go home," I suggest and he nods, more tears down his cheeks. I turn to the doctors. "I want to take him home as soon as possible."

"He might be dangerous," a doctor says as he moves cautiously towards Kuon. I can tell that he's still a resident.

"He's not dangerous," I say in a blunt manner as I narrow my eyes, glaring darkly at him. I turn back to Kuon and cup his cheek. "Would going home help you feel safer?"

"I insist that for your own safety," the doctor continues and I shake my head. I hold to Kuon's hand and turn to the doctor.

"We're fine," I stress. "Please arrange the paperwork so that we can leave as soon as possible," I tell her before focusing on Kuon's left arm. He's starting to move it again. Is it to do with stress.

"I think that Mr. Hizuri might have a drug addiction," the resident says and I bitterly laugh.

"I don't give a f**" I tell him before wrapping my arms around Kuon again. "He's alive. That's all that matters to me."

KyKuKyKu

I feel a deep sting through my body and I don't know what I've done to deserve this. I can tell there's some sort of item over my heart but I still can't tell what's going on. I can't move. I feel something on my face and 'Ricky' aka Tina stands over me again. I still can't understand why she won't forgive me for something that happened when I was fifteen years old. Okay. It's not something that I should ever expect to be forgiven about but how much of her life has she spent around this?

I open my mouth to try to speak but can only get my lips parted less than quarter of an inch. I feel a sharp stab in my arm again. "That should do instead of food," she says and I try to keep my eyes closed but they are forced open and I'm forced to look at pictures of pain, Kyoko's pain.

"You really thought that you were worthy of human interaction?" she asks before pointing to the photo. "I mean, this woman is disgusting, depraved, she should be locked up…" I try to struggle again. I don't know what her point is when it comes to saying these things but I don't want Kyoko to be insulted. "I mean, bestiality is a crime, perverse, disgusting."

I try to steady myself. So she wants to call me a monster, is that her plan. Okay. Call me a monster. I don't know why I'm stuck this way or who that blonde is who appears to have some medical training. I've heard worse. I can suffer through the taunts and the name calling, as long as Kyoko never sees me that way, as long as that isn't the impression I left on my daughters.

"You're a sick monster. You should be caged up and forbidden to come near a human. You're scum but soon you'll learn that," she says as she shows me a flicker of pictures of blood, fire, mutilation, and then another picture of Kyoko. "Rick was never able to take a wife and yet, you've attacked and wounded this poor woman. She's insane. I mean, to think that you were even part human. You're nothing, you shouldn't even have a name. I should kill you. Rid the world of the monster you are but I doubt that anyone would thank me for my service."

Another flicker of images of pain, death, torture, and then another picture of Kyoko and this time our wedding. She must have taken this from a magazine or something. "Don't you feel guilt about being with her."

KyKuKyKu

My eyes flicker in the darkness as I put my hand out and feel someone right next to me. I slam my hand over the person's throat and start to tighten my hold but I feel a hand on my cheek and my grip loosens. I hear the other person cough and I look at her, staring at her. She looks just like Kyoko. No. This is a delusion. This can't be Kyoko. Kyoko is not here. I pull back, my body shaking.

"Who the he-hell are you!" I yell at her and see her flinch slightly. She pushes me back with more force then I expected and sits up, one hand on her throat. "Get out of my wife's body!"

"Co-Corn," she coughs a little. Have I actually done damage to her vocal chords? I turn the light on and move backwards. This is Kyoko, isn't it? This is our bedroom in our house. This is Kyoko. I push my hands through my hair and begin pacing but as I do, I see claws where my hands and fingers should be. I fall down onto the ground like an animal would and try to cover my face. I can't be the person who hurt her. I can't destroy her like they told me that I would.

Soon she is right in front of me, she kneels there staring at me and then gently pushes my hair back. I shake my head desperately. She wants to cage me. She wants to put a leash on me. I can't be here. It's not right. Bestiality is a crime. Bestiality is a sin. She pulls back and sits there and after a long time, I look up and she is still patiently sitting there.

"Hi," she says with a weak smile and I stare at her. "Can I help?" she asks and I shiver.

"Get out of my wife's body," I glare at her and she sighs. She's going to run. She should run. Instead, she just sits there sitting Japanese style with her back as straight as I remember. She places her hands on her knees and I have flashbacks of when I first acted opposite her in that crazy test. I sob again, bringing my head to the floor. "Kyoko," I whisper and she moves so that she has her legs to the side of her. The next thing that I know is that she has my head resting on her lap.

"It'll be okay," she tries to tell her. "I'm here, Corn. I'm here."

KyKuKyKu

I don't want to breathe any longer. I have no reason to continue. Kuon is gone. Our daughters would be better off without me. I know how to interact with Ana but Rose. This is Rose's fault. If she hadn't misbehaved, if Kuon hadn't wanted to protect her then he would be here. I wish that he were here instead of her. No. I'm terrible to think that. I can't turn out like my own mother. I need to push through this pain and remember the deepest love I have for our daughters.

I hear the phone ring and look at the text from Julie-san.

'We should discuss how to honor Kuon.'

I stare at the text. How could she write that to me!? How could she just so easily accept that Kuon is gone, how could she just be so casual with it. Your god damn child is dead, you should be in mourning. I can't believe that she can just text that to me. Does she have no soul? No heart? I throw the phone to the side.

This is because Rose is there, probably. It's because she doesn't understand what she's done and how much heartbreak she's brought to this family. I should never have had children if losing Kuon was the result of that. Corn was always my confidant, my hero, the man I loved so deeply in my heart. I should have never had children and thought that my life would be perfect.

I grab to his ring which I've set right next to my precious stone that he gave to me. If I hadn't been born then maybe Kuon would still be alive. If I had never met Corn, never been selfish enough to fall in love with him, never tried to keep him for myself then this wouldn't be the fate that had to befall him. "I'm sorry," I whisper as I curl up holding his wedding ring in my hand. "I'm so sorry, Corn."

End of Chapter Fifty Four

Thank you for reading, reviews are appreciated

Thank you to the reviewers of Chapter Fifty Three

Kaname671, kyoko minion

AN: I think I devised a schedule where I can write this fic as well as my others and update on a Sunday. It's hard because I also do about 20-30 hours a week of school work hoping to become a court reporter but hopefully I don't falter this time.