The Work-Life Balance Disruption

Chapter 30

Misconstructions

"Ah, Miss Fowler," he said, a sparkle in his eye. "Please, come in."

She just glared back. His resolve faltered for a bit when he saw the icy way she looked at him.

Amy took a deep breath, and entered his office.

"The grades you posted this morning were pretty clear to me, Doctor Cooper," Amy said, taking off her bag and sitting down in the chair at the front of his desk. "I'm curious to see what you would like to talk to me about, considering you gave me a C+."

Doctor Cooper halted for a split-second, before he took his seat behind his desk again.

"Why do you think I asked you to come in last today, Miss Fowler?" he asked.

Amy gave him a look. "To discuss my paper, surely?"

He stared at her. "Of course," he said after a beat.

Amy felt her body temperature rise already. She had to remain calm. It was absolutely essential now. They had things to discuss; namely what the hell they were doing. She needed to know if he actually felt something for her, or if he just found her attractive and wanted a little fun time.

She didn't like the idea of becoming another notch on his bedpost, or a replacement of this skinny colleague he used to fool around with. But if that was the only option he was willing to give her, she would just have to accept that. Maybe.

Doctor Cooper pulled out a printed copy of her paper.

"You already know your final grade, obviously," he said, and his hands seemed to be shaking when handed her the paper. "But there are some points which could be improved, and you might be able to get some extra credit. Your final grade could become a B if you clarify some of the passages in this."

Amy took the paper from him and leaved through it. He had scribbled quite a few questions in the margins, and circled passages with question marks next to it. When she looked at it now, she was surprised she had even managed a passing grade.

"Alright," she said after she read through some of his remarks. "When would I have to hand in the revised version then?"

Doctor Cooper was looking at her, his brow furrowed slightly. It was almost as if he didn't understand why she was being so distant with him.

"The day after tomorrow in the latest," he muttered softly. "I'll have everything graded and the final grades will be posted online Friday morning; the last day of the semester."

Amy blinked. The last day of the semester. He would no longer be her teacher that Friday. There was a time when she had been counting down the days till that moment, but right now, she couldn't get too excited by the thought of the semester being over – she was too conflicted still.

Would he expect her to be waiting for him that Friday? They had sort of made a promise to each other.

But now she didn't know she even wanted him anymore. All this talk about him that weekend had made her question him; his integrity as a teacher, or as a professional scientist. He had been involved with a colleague in the past, and now he was trying to get it on with her; a student. What was she supposed to think, really?

It just didn't seem ethical. Luckily, they hadn't done it yet, she figured. At least her innocence was still there, although if it had been up to her it wouldn't be. And really, the other stuff they had done couldn't really be classified as innocent.

She was just going to see if she could get him to admit it himself; his dalliances with his colleague. And his intentions with her as well. She was going to resist him.

Though he did look very hot in his button-down with his cuffs pushed up to his elbows, his tie loosely around his neck. Resisting this was going to be a challenge.

"Thank you for this opportunity, Doctor Cooper," Amy replied. "I'll start working on it as soon as possible then." She bent forwards, stuffing the printed version of her paper in her bag.

"Amy," Doctor Cooper said.

She looked at him questioningly. "Professor?"

A vein in his neck started to throb as he stared at her. "Miss Fowler, then," he said, "why do you think I pencilled you in as my last appointment of the day?"

Amy blushed. She had a hunch.

"I don't think the time of the appointment matters, Doctor Cooper," she said – riling him up on purpose. "But I'll leave then, since your workday is over now."

She made a move to get up from her seat.

"Amy, please!" he exclaimed. "Will you cut this out?"

Amy sat down again and crossed her arms over her chest. She looked at him defiantly.

"And then what?" she said, raising her eyebrows at him. Doctor Cooper looked flustered.

"Why are you acting like this?" he asked, and Amy felt some sort of sick satisfaction that he was this confused by her behaviour.

"Like what? I thought this appointment was to discuss my paper," Amy said. "We have just discussed it, so I plan to leave. Or was there something else you wanted? Doctor Cooper?"

His face was flushed, and he inhaled deeply through his nose. He didn't blink for an extremely long time. Amy tried to keep her stoic expression.

"There is plenty I want," he said slowly. "Which you already know."

"Yes," Amy answered equally slowly. "You want me to revise the second-to-last paragraph on page 7 and the final conclusion on page 13. And fix some other bits in the middle."

The vein on his neck appeared to be popping out of his skin.

"I'm not talking about your paper, Amy," he said firmly, his hands were squeezed to fists on his desk.

Amy blinked at him. She was getting flushed as well.

"What else could you possibly want from me?" she asked, and she was surprised herself by how steady her voice sounded.

"What could I - -" he repeated, incredulously. "Dear lord, Amy. You're acting like there is nothing going on between us!"

"Aren't you still my professor?" she asked.

"Well, yes, but - -"

"Then I think I'd better go now," Amy interrupted him, "we wouldn't want another scandal to happen now, and have you demoted even further, hm?"

It was a low blow.

Doctor Cooper whitened considerably. But his eyes narrowed at her in anger.

"Is that what this is about?" he said, crossing his arms. "You want to talk about my past?"

He was pissed off. Before Amy had a chance to blink, he continued.

"I should have known when Penny came home drunk Saturday night," he muttered. "She probably told you everything already, but if you think I'm going to make excuses for something that happened almost two years ago, prepare to be thoroughly disappointed."

Amy opened her mouth to retort, but he didn't let her get a word in edgewise.

"What do you want to know? Yes, I had a sexual relationship with a co-worker. It lasted four months. It meant nothing to me but stress relief and a way to clear my mind after days of hard work. When I found out it meant more to her, I ended it."

He paused. "It's safe to say she did not like that."

"Is that all?" Amy said in disbelief. "I heard you got demoted because of this… Or am I supposed to believe you wanted to get into teaching after spending your entire academic career doing research in string theory?"

He inhaled sharply and Amy thought he looked like a raging bull.

"Taking this job as a professor wasn't a demotion per se," he said – red in the face now, "but I couldn't keep working in the same department as the woman who blackmailed me by threatening to accuse me of plagiarism and sexual assault, if I didn't continue having sexual encounters with her."

Amy felt bile rise up in her throat. This ex of his was seriously messed up. Why had she felt the need to question him about this? She had been insecure about her feelings for him, yes. But that didn't really justify her prying like this – although she did feel like she had the right to know more than he let on. She hardly knew anything about him.

"Are you happy now? Knowing this about me?" he asked, venomously.

Amy blushed in shame. She wasn't. She looked away from his staring eyes.

"You could have just asked me anything you wanted to know, Amy," he continued, more subdued. "I don't like to talk about this part of my past, because of obvious reasons. But that doesn't mean you get to draw your conclusions by whatever Penny and Bernadette tell you."

Amy shifted in her seat. He made a valid point.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

Doctor Cooper nodded, indicating that he heard her.

"But in my defence," Amy murmured, "It's not like you talk about your past or yourself much, if at all."

His lips curled up in a half-smile. "Well, it's hard to talk when my mouth is between your legs, now is it?"

Amy blushed. She fiddled with the hem of her skirt. He mentioned it so casually, and without a hint of shame. It made her feel embarrassed almost, when she thought about her total lack of experience before she met him.

"That's not all we've been doing," she whispered.

"No," Doctor Cooper agreed, smirking, "but it could have been what we were doing right now if you hadn't brought up my ex. No offense, but talking about her doesn't get my motor running."

Amy exhaled softly.

That settled it then.

He had made this appointment with her this late in the afternoon because he wanted to get down and dirty with her. She was turning out to become one of the notches on his bedpost after all. At least she could stop contemplating his intentions now. She had been going crazy thinking about it.

In a way, it felt like a relief. Knowing he just wanted her for the sex.

She didn't have to worry about her own feelings that way. She would just have to bury them away, and they would disappear soon enough.

And in another way, it didn't feel like a relief at all.

She would have liked it, if he wanted more than just the physical stuff. But that wasn't his thing apparently. Hadn't he classified this thing with his ex as "a sexual relationship"? Stress relief, he had said. He didn't make it sound like he wanted anything beside that.

She should respect that, she guessed. Amy exhaled slowly again.

"Amy?"

She looked up at him, and cursed herself for feeling the tears well up in her eyes. "Yes?"

He blinked at her. "Was that all you wanted to know? Since we're talking now?"

Amy nodded quickly. Yes, he had been perfectly clear. She would just have to come to terms with the fact that there were no feelings involved from his side of this… thing – just attraction between them.

Which was fine. She would be just one of his conquests – she probably wasn't the first student he had done this with – and would gain some knowledge about sex in the meantime.

It was a win-win situation. She just needed to come to terms with it.

"Yes," she said. "I'm sorry you didn't get the ehm… stress-relief you wanted this afternoon. I didn't really know that was the point of this appointment. You made it sound like a professional meeting Friday. If I'd known otherwise, I wouldn't have worn tights…"

He looked confused.

"What are you talking about?" he asked. "This was a professional meeting… And while I prefer you without tights, I don't really know what you mean. 'Stress relief'?"

Amy blushed all over. Did she have to say it?

"You know…" she whispered conspiratorially, "a blowjob or something?"

He stared at her.

"I'm new to this," Amy mumbled weakly when he didn't respond, "I don't know what you expect from this. What do the other students do in meetings like these?"

He looked at her like she slapped him across the face.

"Excuse me?" he hissed.

Amy hesitated for a second. "I-I-I thought that –" she started.

"If you have any intelligence whatsoever Miss Fowler, you shut mouth right now," he snarled. "I don't know what's going on in that head of yours, but your assumptions couldn't be more far off."

He pushed at his desk almost angrily, and got up. He stalked towards her.

"Other students?" he repeated.

"I do not go around bedding my students," he emphasized. "If I did, I would have had you under me weeks ago… And am I to understand that is how you see me?"

He had her cornered now, standing in front of her, while she trembled in her seat. This was taking a turn she didn't really understand.

"W-well, you were just talking about how you tend to end things when - -" Amy stammered.

"How I ended things with a woman I felt nothing but physical attraction for, yes," he interjected sharply.

Amy's throat went dry.

"It turns out my intentions with you weren't as clear as I thought," he muttered.

Amy's stomach constricted in itself. Heat flushed over her. What did he mean?

"Tell me Amy," he said, "if I just wanted you in bed with me, why would I bother going to your aunt's funeral? In a church no less, a building my own mother can I only get me to enter once a year? Or why would I go out of my way to meet your parents? Get your mother's approval? Do a pro bono case for your father?"

Amy had trouble breathing.

"I don't go around buying presents for just anyone. Do you know what kind of reciprocity the act of gift giving implies?"

Amy blinked. She felt like she was steadily developing a fever. She was hot all over. He was telling her things now that made her think maybe he did want more than just sex from her.

She didn't know how to respond.

"Here I am, thinking it's all so obvious, but I should have known you would let yourself be corrupted by those women and their talks of my past," he shook his head.

Amy felt affronted on their behalf; if it weren't for the girls, she wouldn't even have known him like this. She was about to open her mouth and defend them when he beat her to it.

"I couldn't have been any clearer with my intentions, if you ask me," he continued, walked back and forth in front of her. "But instead here you are, thinking I do this every semester apparently, with a different girl…"

Amy blushed. Okay, so maybe not.

He came to a halt and turned to look at her.

"Do you think I planned for this to happen?" he asked cynically. "Falling in love with you?"

To be continued

A/N I'd like to thank Liv for her help getting this chapter where it needed to go.

As always; stay home and stay safe. Be kind to one another in these difficult times.

Leave me review and make my day.