Chapter 31
Black.
Everything was black. Completely void of any existence. Empty.
Cold.. so cold. Frozen to the core.
Yet she didn't feel a thing; numb to all. When did the sensations cease? What even were they again?
How long had it been since.. since something.
How long was she floating here? Where..?
The blaring noise of silence was deafening; pounding in her ears. Roaring so loudly of absolute nothing.. Purgatory's song of oblivion. The saturnine darkness. So calming. The desolate sound cradling her. It would be so easy to succumb into the stillness. Its chilling Siren call, enticing..
"Anna!"
Huh? What was that?
A spark.
"No.. No.."
It sounded like.. someone. Who?
An increasingly growing glimmer.
"Please.."
..Elsa?
A brilliant flash.
Elsa!
Anna felt herself roughly jerked into consciousness with a wave of disgusting nausea, water coming forth and spilling out her mouth with a excruciating retch. She squeezed her eyes shut against the brightness assaulting her; her throat burning, lungs heaving and continuing another round of coughs to clear the residual water. Pain. Her coughs echoed in her pounding head, the vibrations screwing with her senses. Her chest was sore and her body ached something terrible.
With tremendous effort, she fought to prop herself up on her elbows, coughs slowly subsiding and breathing gradually evening out. The lethargic movement was strange, trusty limbs feeling completely non-existent. Wet. Cold. Frozen. It was almost like she was still floating in that realm of numbness. She finally took a deep breath, letting out another gurgled groan from the lingering sheen of river coating her throat. Then she felt something fuzzy drape over her shoulders, distant but immediate, maybe two fuzzies, tugged tightly in front of her. Her eyes finally fluttered open, braving the light as the blurs came into focus, looking to the form kneeling directly in front of her.
Sitting on her haunches, porcelain hands clenched into sheet-white knuckled fists holding the towels around Anna's elevated torso, and shivering horribly, sat her Double's partner. Her usually pallid cheeks were flushed in a mauve-like rouge, matching her nose and ears.. and she was completely soaked through, eye shadow messily blending with dark mascara along the pristine outline of her round eyes.
But mostly, Anna watched the extreme 'awe' actively wash over the previously grief stricken features; wide blue eyes now lidded slightly, a dewy wetness breaking over a pinnacle hold and trickling down rosy cheeks, spreading the gray marring streaks in their wakes.
In the same instant that Anna went to open her mouth, she saw, though more so felt, the blonde dive straight into her, slightly knocking them back onto the cement floor.
Strong arms wrapped around her whole frame, hugging her fiercely; like she was an apparition that would vanish in a fluttering blink of an eye. The familiar body was quivering near uncontrollably and Anna was slowly regaining some semblance of awareness to her physical environment. Cold hard floor under her, loud howling gusts in the near distance, warm wet body on top of her.. Okay. She's starting to get it; fragmented bits beginning to come back.
Anna clumsily brought her shaky hand to the back of Elsa's head, her other remaining on the floor for some stabilization. She could feel heavy, uneven hot breaths against her collar; hear the gasping disbelief and choked breaths of what may have been a battled sob. Unsure what to do, she simply held the distraught woman close, letting her cheek rest comfortably against dripping blonde hair. She was still too hazy to really offer anything much more cognizant than statue-like comfort. She needed a heavy passage of seconds for everything to come back. And until it did, she was happy to hold onto this embrace. Elsa's body was freezing, yet it still made Anna feel so much warmer than before.
She didn't need the tempting ease provided in oblivion's nothingness; not when she could have her world's everything wrapped in her arms.
Mere seconds passed before Anna felt the other body retracting. No, the warmth!
Anna blinked disorientingly as she saw the other rower stabilize herself. Well-defined arms came back toward her and Anna readily fell into them, barely aware of her own movements while getting pulled upright. The words were low, heat of Elsa's breath passing over her face. "Let's get you inside." There was no time for Anna's sluggish brain to comprehend anything right now, other than enjoying the small gifts of heat.
As the two stumbled weakly into the building, Anna let her head lull onto the other's shoulder, awareness starting to break through. "You saved me.." she grumbled tiredly, feeling her foot misstep and her body fall hard into the other's present support. She only heard a poorly stifled scoff as she was quickly righted; voice thicker than any scoff she'd heard escape the older rower before.
The rest of their silent drawled steps passed by in a blink of an eye.
…
With Elsa's literal support, Anna found a seat on one of the benches. Though the lights were out, the dense enclosed space of the locker room offered a welcoming warmness to the shivering women.
"Alright, come on," the Senior said, slight click of her teeth catching on her last syllable, stepping forward with urgency evident in her step. Not a beat later, her hands were pulling the dingy towel away from the redhead's body and reaching for Anna's jacket zipper. It wasn't until the item had been drawn down with a humming pitch that the freshman had a moment of realization, stunned at the action.
"Wh-what are you doing?!" she gasped in shocked confusion, body stiffening as her heart's rate shot up. She felt the jacket being coaxed off her sticky arms.
Bending above her, somehow without missing a beat, lips drawn down, Elsa levelly explained, "You need to get out of the cold clothes and warmed up. Now." Her face was in shadow, only partly, but not enough to disguise the sudden darkening of cheeks. Despite the obvious battled bashfulness of the situation, her timbre definitely maintained remnants of earlier panic. Anna could only tell because she felt it too.
Anna did not fight it past that, letting her body relax into the assisted movements. Her fingers were tingling with pins and needles, so her clumsiness would be useless at trying to peel up damp spandex at this time. Blushing profusely feeling calloused hands deftly rid her of the work out top and her shorts, leaving her standing in just her underwear, Anna hugged an arm crossing her midsection, the other crossing her chest. She was very cold, but also gradually falling deeper and deeper into the grim embarrassment of the situation; not one to be shy of flaunting her bared midriff in the past, but more the baring of her helplessness, a regular damsel in need of a savior. She didn't want to be seen that way.
But she wasn't left feeling exposed like that for more than a hot second as three weighty, dry towels were instantly wrapped around her, one directly pulled over her head.
Whether mutual or not, the obvious discomfort of the scenario didn't seem to deter the other woman. Elsa was all business right now; professional and responsible in all senses of the word.
After yanking out a huge supply of team owned towels from the cabinet, Elsa had moved quickly toward the communal shower area, the sounds of water spritzing to life had Anna watching curiously as her teeth chattered on. Another squeak, another stream. Over and over, until each shower head was on and pouring at full velocity. Elsa grabbed two more towels out of her messily strewn pile and, from what Anna could tell, piled them somewhere in the back of the open set of showers.
Elsa stepped back into the visible doorway, taking just a moment to observe her handy work, before hurriedly turning to face the seated woman.
Anna could see the billowing clouds of steam steadily rolling behind her body like a smoke machine effect.
A second later, the leading woman had taken Anna's hand, tugging her into the shower area, briefly testing the water as a precaution before looking back at her teammate.
"Sit here. Warm up in the steam," she said while moving Anna to sit on the soft cushioning. "Do not go into the actual hot water." It sounded like an awfully cruel test to torture the shivering girl who wanted nothing more than to submerge herself under the heated wash, but Elsa's words were stern and definitive. Anna had long since come to trust Elsa's judgment on her physical health. So she listened without question, sitting along the back wall in a cloud of steam, just out of the scalding water's reach.
She then watched Elsa move back to the locker room, probably preparing her own chilled body to go through the same procedure. Anna, to the best of her abilities, let herself relax as the steam began to gradually heat the air around her like a wonderful blanket. Leaning her head against the tile, towel covering her shoulders absorbing the warm essence, the weary calling was too much.
This time, with half-lidded eyes staring unfocused toward the ceiling, unwilling to fully close them for fear of crashing rapids flooding her thoughts too soon, Anna willfully succumbed to the decadent sensation enticing her body..
The time had passed slowly, no less than a half hour for sure; absolutely no qualms about letting the building's hot water supply run frigid. Towels tightly hugged around both of them, the two rowers ushered back into the small locker area; residual warmth of the makeshift sauna emanated and filled the tight space. Elsa walked toward her locker.
"Get a change of clothes from your locker," she said in passing to Anna, tone still holding an oddly commanding edge.
In their warming respite, Anna had finally felt the wherewithal to question their circumstances, both internally and out loud. The what, when, and most of all, how. She had tried to ignore the dark swirls and bubbles that swam in her vision the second she had rested her eyes, the panicking sensation she only ever felt submerged in water. So she had forced her eyes up to the rafters, asking for Elsa's input instead; needing to hear something other than the tearing noises while remembering.
Unfortunately, or maybe not, Elsa's reply had been glib; her head leaned back against the tile wall, eyes closed, voice flatter than day old soda when speaking:
"I dove in after you, got us both in the boat, and rowed back."
It had left Anna wondering, looking for a more satisfying answer, questions mounting, internally craving details, yet the fatigue that her warming body gradually felt was overpoweringly lulling. And if she was being honest, no matter how much she always longed for elaborations, Elsa leaving out specifics of the wild river's rage and its aftermath had definitely been for the better as she recuperated.
The strict safety commands had just followed the duo into the locker room, now back in to reality.
Even though both were weary, Anna was still sort of hoping to see the sweet woman from their row earlier, lightening the mood or being all warm and almost fluffy-like. But Elsa was in a state of excessive composure, directions fired off like an Army General; no room for joking. Shut off. In control. Anna knew this woman, knew how she assimilated into the role of caregiver with ease and Anna knew the circumstances were appropriate, whether she liked it or not.
Teal eyes darted to her assigned numbered locker, unsure of Elsa's wording. "Uh, I only have a change of socks, sneakers and my windbreaker in there.." She shrugged when Elsa raised an incredulous brow. Well, what on earth did she expect? These slim lockers were meant to just have some additional or spare stuff. Not a full wardrobe. Who could even organize these little things to be practically functional?
The blonde sighed, opening her own. Anna's eyes widened, jaw dropping as she absentmindedly gripped harder on her towel.
"You should always have spare clothes for this very reason, Anna," Elsa said tiredly, hand reaching in to sift through the hangers (plural!), and attached magnetic baskets of socks and other small articles. "Grab what you have from your own. I have extra stuff you can wear."
Anna swallowed stiffly as she pulled herself away from the miniature closet. Opening her own now was severely apparent on just how much room she could theoretically use for functional storage if she put her mind to it. She rolled her eyes quickly, not about to berate her past self for not thinking ahead or planning for such unforeseeable turn of events.
She put on her new dry socks while sitting on the bench, sneakers and jacket on the seat next to her. She slowly watched as Elsa pulled out various sets of clothes, no, outfits; way more than would be expected. Was there a Mary Poppins bag in there? How did she seriously have that much stuff?
Anna hugged her towel tighter to herself as she glanced up to what Elsa was handing her.
"Here's a fleece long sleeve, sweatshirt, pair of long spandex and sweats," she said, stacking each obnoxiously purple university themed item higher and higher in Anna's outstretched arms. "And here's spare underwear," she said, distractedly dropping a pair of light blue panties onto the top of the pile with teal eyes stretching substantially. Anna was about to awkwardly turn and stalk away, mostly to conceal her incredible blush, but Elsa caught her once more. "Wait, pick a bra. I have two."
The freshman looked at the garments dangling from Elsa's fingers, waiting for her to take one. The selection was blaringly obvious and Anna didn't understand why Elsa would even give her the choice between a standard sports bra and the push-up bra that was so obviously a cup size too big.. Why is this the first time I have to start considering what her bust size actually is? With an uncomfortable chuckle, Anna grabbed the smaller athletics bra and hurried off to get changed near her own locker and get some much needed breathing room.
Every clothing item felt like heaven; dry, warm, and snug in all the most wonderful ways. A fluffy hug enveloping her almost as wonderfully as the subtle scent of familiar clean linen coming from the sweatshirt; the fragrance distantly reminding her of a crisp snowfall of winter.
…
The two sat in Elsa's car, soaked for many reasons at this point, most recently having been the all-out sprint the short distance into the parking lot, Elsa's car thankfully parked in the first spot. But braving a bit more rain would be so worth it to get out of here.
Still steadying her panting breath and pulling her hood down, Anna stared out at the waterfall cascading down the windshield as Elsa turned the key in the ignition.
First turn… Second turn…
Turning quickly to the Senior, Anna's eyes narrowed as she listened to the brief squelching sound from the engine, waiting for the typical start of hum, just as beautifully as it had been fresh out of the mechanic's. Everything went silent near immediately. The keys turned again, and again, clacking and jingling with the sharp motion. Not another sound was made from the vehicle. She turned to the blonde with confusion, hearing quiet repetitive murmurs of 'no' steadily growing more desperate with each attempted turn.
"Dammit.." the Senior eventually cursed under her breath, hand stilling. "Not again."
"What happened?" Anna questioned, looking around the vehicle in blind inspection. Elsa did the same, more accurately eyeing all of the buttons and controls around the driver's side. "It just got fixed."
Then, right when the comment ended, Elsa groaned as if in physical pain, forehead falling onto the steering wheel unceremoniously with a quiet thud; hand blindly reaching for a signal lever beside the wheel, tiny click audible as she turned a knob dramatically with her fingers. "I left my lights on.. This happened once last year, meaning the battery needs a jolt." She held her head in that position, arms rising up onto the wheel over her head; body behavior the epitome of the ultimate sulk.
The whole pathetic scene made Anna begin to giggle. It was the first time since she'd returned to the land of the living that the Senior finally broke the leader-like position, guard dropping enough for the natural dorky side of the blonde to show herself. Here was Her Majesty, moping in a soaking wet mess, head down on her steering wheel. How could it not be comical?
The blonde lifted her head, sending an aberrant pout in the younger girl's direction. Teal eyes only widened and her laugh intensified to the point that she was clutching her sides.
"Stop," whined the older girl. "It's not funny.." She looked like a damp child as she said it. Maybe it was because her glower looked so defeated, but it was all so adorable. Elsa was adorable. But that wasn't the best part.
With a shaky hand, wavering from her laughter, Anna touched her finger to Elsa's forehead. She beamed through her laughs. "No. You got a huge, red splotch there now!"
Elsa looked horrified, checking her rearview briefly before her hand shot up to her forehead, covering the blemish. Her pouting cheeks were suddenly flushed crimson.
She's just too cute, Anna thought as her chuckles slowly lessened and a warm smile spread on her face. She brought her hand back to Elsa's head, moving the woman's own away.
Elsa raised her nervous eyes to the redhead. Anna smiled. "It's becoming of the Queen," she snorted softly, brushing the Senior's damp bangs aside to reveal it more. She watched a tiny smile form on the Stroke-seat rower's lips as she leaned her side into the driver's seat, body relaxing a little amidst the otherwise irksome situation. The redhead slowly brought her hand to the blonde's cheek, lightly cupping it. The blonde's usually unyielding exterior was soft, relenting in her defeat, and she let out a sigh at the reassuring contact, though worry lines remained etched by her brow.
Anna hadn't even realized how much she'd started to lean across the car divider until that particular moment. Oh my god. What am I doing? Stop this now, Anna. Becoming aware of their closeness, she continued to draw her hand down Elsa's cheek until she brought it away and back to her own lap; much safer territory.
A few seconds later, trying to think of something to clear the heaviness of the resulting interaction, she chuckled. "Wow, Audrey's gonna find this hilarious when I tell her," Anna mumbled in amusement. Her new friend had basically all but called this exact thing eventually happening. She turned to her partner, about to further explain the conversation they'd shared on the date, thinking the irony may lighten the mood, but she noticed the blonde's demeanor change, shoulders rigid again; navy eyes dropped to tightly laced fingers, pressed hard into her lap. Her body almost looked like it was leaning away into the support of the door now.. No. It had to be her imagination.
The older rower tucked her chin lower, a gentle pink blushing over her porcelain cheeks. Her voice, although unwavering, had a mortified undertone; as if the mere idea of being seen in such a humiliating situation by anyone other than Anna would completely destroy her. "I'd.. really appreciate you not.. tell anyone."
Anna picked at her finger's cuticle, gritting her teeth trying to think of something else to say. Or rather something appropriate and befitting of the current social environment. She had forgotten that Elsa seemed put off by the mechanic for some reason (Maybe her brashness? Elsa hated loud forward people, too..), so obviously it was a bad idea to bring her up. Stupid Anna. She needed to watch her words and not say something that would send their already rocky relationship tipping over like her boat had. Oh gosh, just the mere memory itself brought a sudden chill to her body and she desperately fought to stifle the shiver crawling into her muscles.
"So, um.." She mulled her words, eyes sliding to watch the waterfall stream down the windshield. "Does this mean we're stuck here?" The gusty wind swirled around the car, shaking it slightly as its howls rolled through the car's cabin. Taunting.
Elsa rapidly blinked away the remnants of her reclusive expression, coming back to their current circumstance as well. She raised her fist to her lips, clearing her throat almost distractedly. She looked down to where her keys rested, forgotten in the ignition before sighing again, coming to answer Anna's question. "Looks like it." A small shivering sound was loud enough to fill the car. Elsa turned quickly, catching the redhead's uncontrolled body spasm in her peripheral despite buried beneath the layered clothes. "Let's go back inside and figure it out. It'll be much warmer," she said with a concerned frown.
"Good plan!" Anna chirped, trying to tuck back the chatter in her teeth. The goosebumps on her arms were suddenly painfully obvious to her without the car's heat ever turning on.
"Seriously, lightweight or not, you need to eat a hamburger to add a smidge of fat to your bones."
Aqua eyes lit up accompanied with a hungry moan. "Ughhhh I want 10…"
"I was implying maybe one extra.. you still have to make weight-in," Elsa said with a little smirk, taking advantage of the small reprieve to add a bit of lightness to a grave situation, pulling out her keys and putting her hand on the door handle.
"Sometimes it really really really sucks rowing as a lightweight." Anna sulked, eyeing Elsa's hand on the door. She took a breath as another large gust slammed against the car. "You ready?" She put her own hand on her handle, tugging the hood of the coat up.
"On three…" Anna nodded, listening to Elsa's controlled tone. "One.. two.."
Another huge gale swept through the parking lot and they heard a grinding, snapping sound. One of the small trees lining the parking lot suddenly tipped over, landing square in front of the car's bumper. Anna let out a panicked laugh, throwing open her door. "Tree!"
Both girls clumsily clambered out of the car, squealing into the deafening stormy weather as rain pelted them horizontally. Yanking her hood over her head, Anna raised her arm over her face to shield against the mixture of water and hail-like projectiles while the wind pushed her back. No more than 20 feet from the door, crossing the parking lot was surely about to drench her new clothes even more, that is if the wind didn't sweep her off her feet completely.
Under the dour skies and limiting view, she could feel the strong body adhere to her side, wrapping a sure arm around her waist, bracing them as they ran toward their last remaining shelter.
…
Thunder boomed overhead, lightning flashing through the lone building window just as Elsa finished punching in a small door lock code. She flicked on the light switch, tiny light bulb on a side table lamp flickering to life; the beige shade around it masked the brightness to a gold glow. Anna carefully stepped into the cramped room located at the top of the boathouse, eyes wide and curious.
Ascending the hidden, creaky wooden stairwell in the dark of the evening was nothing short of eerie, and if she were here with absolutely anyone else then she would definitely be questioning whether this was going to lead her to some creepy regret.
"Why didn't I know this room existed earlier?" she gaped in wonder, taking in the old loft-like room.
A patterned throw rug was worn flat into the floor with a low wooden coffee table weighting it down. Two equally worn couches, both barely larger than a love-seat, with fabric design definitely dating back to the early 80's, fit adjacent in the far corner; tears in the fiber visible even at the short distance. The little space left a lot to be desired.
"It's the Senior lounge," Elsa said passingly, slowly putting her stuff on the floor. "No underclassmen get the pass-code."
"This place?" she said with a raised brow, scrutinizing eye only comparing it to the expensive new business building structure she'd seen on campus. Anna dropped her own stuff beside Elsa's before stepping over to the small clunky TV. She grabbed the remote off the top of the device, frowning skeptically at the amount of dust accumulated. "Uh, do you guys not clean up here? Like ever?" Elsa turned to look at what Anna was referring to. Giving a heaving blow, Anna blew the dust from the remote and the blonde looked taken aback, frowning concern bordering near aghast. If Elsa's immaculate apartment was anything to speak to it, the older girl was quite meticulous in her order and cleanliness.
"I nearly forgot about it. This is my first time actually coming up here, and it's… definitely.." She cast her gaze across the place, hands on her hips, lips faltering in a grimace. "Well, there's a reason it's lost popularity over the years." She sucked in a breath before stepping over to the only closet door near the back. "But, at least it's warm."
Continuing her own inspection, Anna figured out the remote control quickly. Clicking to life, she was glad to see that the default channel was the weather channel. Perfect. Well, at least the channel was perfect.
Definitely not the News.
A small groan of distaste passed her puckering lips, arms folding over her chest as she listened to the weatherman; the red alert banners flashing across the bottom of the television screen only intensifying the message. "Fuck, this sucks.." That gained the blonde's attention, coming to stand nearby; similar, albeit cleaner, sentiments falling from her own mouth.
It looked like it was more than a normal storm. Arendelle was actually getting hit by an unexpected extratropical cyclone rolling in from a major hurricane; unusually early for the season. The city being nestled on the southeastern part of the country made it a blue moon occurrence to be hit so hard, but any Category 5 hurricane left some nasty wind storms in its wake.
Within the blaring headlines, there was a warning for all city residents to stay indoors, get to high ground, and get as far away from any large water sources as possible until the winds subsided. Hey, at least they were following some of those orders.
As Anna continued to just stare at the evening News, Elsa had immediately gone about calling a local pick-up service about her car, pacing back and forth in an animated discussion. Ultimately, at least per the one open business, no services could do anything until the weather warnings were cleared; an apparent mandatory travel ban was also instated for the next few hours until the gale force winds dropped, lessening the risk of accidents from more downed trees and power-lines. Already seeing one tree fall first hand gave sound reason to the advisory. But the news still sucked.
They truly were stranded. Awesome.
But it was the most awkward of all when Elsa mentioned that perhaps it was the travel ban that had held up Coach Oaken from coming to check on them, since they had mentioned being out in the water around the time the storm rolled in anyway.
"He always follows the weather. I'm surprised he didn't even text or call to check on us in the very least.." she mumbled curiously while looking at her phone after expressing her thoughts. She took a seat beside Anna who was now sitting stiffly on cleaner of the two couches.
Anna clenched her jaw. The words immediately triggered her recall of Elsa's request from this afternoon. Oh.. shit.
"Er.. about that.." she said nervously, hand raised to her neck. Anna had to confess that, potentially, in her coined 'gay panic', she may have forgotten to alert the coach of their plans and thus their whereabouts. "I sort of.. forgot to tell him.." Elsa gave her such a look of disapproving disbelief and right away, Anna knew that she had royally messed up.
"Anna, I specifically told you to," she said sternly with a fixed gaze, reprimand apparent as Anna slouched. The blonde all but raised a stereotypical admonishing finger. "Never go out on the river alone, at least without telling a coach."
Anna tried to give an innocent "But I wasn't alone, I was with you..?" remark, to which Elsa shook her head tiredly.
"Always tell your coach. You never know what emergencies can arise." Blue eyes scanned over her freckled face, growing apologetic by the end of the sentence. Her voice came out softer, dropping the reprimand. "How are you feeling?"
Blinking quickly, Anna gave a slight nod. Although a fun quip was formulated in her brain, she instead voiced a short, "Okay." It seemed to be enough.
"Good." After a long pause, the older student finished the statement with a weary sigh, turning to look at the dredging water pouring down the room's window. Her eyes were fleetingly distant and weak to fatigue, mind sorting and sifting through a lot of something, before Anna could see a re-hardening in the profile. "Tomorrow morning you're going straight to the school nurse." The blonde looked back to face her, completely stone faced with authority. "You're getting a full physical exam to make sure you're well."
Despite knowing she really should be listening with more concern, Anna still groaned unhappily at the order. "Come on, I'm fine now. They're just going to tell me to take it easy again," she said while rolling her eyes and flopping back with her arms behind her head. She noticed the Senior give her a tsking head shake.
"If that's what it takes, then you will do exactly what they say." The words were as final as they could be. Anna had learned that.
Teal eyes glanced toward the small window frame, tracing the shape of it for an instant distractedly before taking a breath. All evening the two had been loosely dancing around the real subject at hand; barely mentioning the primary reason for where they both found themselves this evening, or acknowledging why that even was.
"Thanks for, ya know, saving me," Anna quietly voiced a little uneasily after a prolonged silence. She chuckled nervously, subconsciously wanting to alleviate the heavy tension associated with that phrase and trying to abate the scary reminder that she was quite literally minutes from not making it back. "I mean.. It'd kinda be a bummer if you didn't." She awkwardly grinned, hoping to elicit a chuckle from the blonde, pretty sure that the weight of this topic would be affecting Elsa just as much. When her weak attempt at lightening the moment failed miserably (yet again), and she was met with further silence, she figured that Elsa wasn't about to take this nearly as light-hearted as herself.
"You are enrolling in proper swim lessons," stated the blonde in a flat tone. Even if the words purposefully grazed the past the central topic, dodging the direct acknowledgement with skill, her tone was seriously firm, leaving just as little room for argument as the infirmary order. It brought the smallest eye rolls in a form of tease from the teenager and Elsa did not let her stern eye falter. "I'm not kidding, Anna."
And, despite the strange amusement she picked from the particular choice of words, Anna knew it was the total truth; that Elsa would probably do the enrollment process for her. It was the sincerity behind the words that made her find some stygian humor.. if she didn't play it off with a chuckle, she'd probably have started tearing up at the reason being.. She really was not up for fighting the good point, and Elsa seemed equally set to avoid as much of the incident as possible.
Tonight's event gave a whole new meaning to her 'liquid doom' description of bodies of water, and no pool-based swim test nor lone ocean wave experience could have ever prepared her for it. But Elsa had been there. And Elsa saved her. Anna could never be more grateful.
"Now, take time and rest. I'll look for some blankets."
She nodded to acknowledge Elsa's words, actually happy to oblige.
A little while later found the two seated on the old, fraying couch; a knitted blanket dug out from the closet wrapped around both of their shoulders (per Anna's request). They sat in a comfortable closeness, the magnetic essence of their shoulders just barely brushing the other. Anna could only attribute the sorely missed proximity to both women needing the reminders that they were safe. Not like either was even sure how to begin verbally working through this mess.
So she distracted her attention to the boring old movie playing on television; way less stressful than the weather channel, but still far from her preferred superhero selections. Beside her, Elsa had taken out her Eastern European Language History book. The ever prepared scholar, Anna had mused upon seeing the textbook pulled out of Elsa's work satchel. While I have yet to even open 2 of my text books this semester..
She thought to ask what the blonde was reading about (or rather why was she bothering to read a textbook obviously from last semester; like, what normal student does that?). Anna had to wonder if it was just an escape to immerse the brain with something familiar, while reducing the other stresses which were barely kept at bay. She could appreciate that interpretation; happy to continue blankly watching the gaudy, straight-to-video movie for the same reason.
There was a comfortable silence between the girls.
Thunder clashes.
Movie sounds.
Anna's chuckles.
An occasional page flip.
The atmosphere was warm, inside and out. Especially beneath their shared blanket.
Anna had covertly been sneaking side glances toward the Senior throughout the evening, originally because she really couldn't help herself, perhaps it was as much as a happy distraction to physically see the woman at her side as a mind-numbing Rom-Com. But that's when she started to notice the blonde seeming anything but calm, fingers tapping along the edge of the couch arm; initially starting out of nowhere, but growing in their fervent tap. The page turning had lessened in frequency, energy having been transferred to the worrying hand.
Just about when Anna was going to drop a question to the nervous behavior, Elsa stood without warning. She swiftly made her way over to one of two windows overlooking the river side of the boathouse. A thumb was distractedly brought to her lips, the other wrapped around her midsection for support.
Anna watched before venturing to ask, "What's the matter?" She was already standing and approaching when she heard a depressed sigh.
Gazing out into the gloomy storm, pelting rain falling from obsidian skies obscured most of the view outside, even if there was a hint of silhouette along the drenched docks. "I kept trying not to think about it.. but I just had to check." The words were reflective, freckled with sadness, as they were spoken against her delicately closed fist. "The Nokk.."
Anna froze.
No. Oh, no. No no no.
She hadn't even given any second thought to what had come of their boats. Any and all in-depth details regarding the unfolding events were still tossed to the wayest of sides; the fluffy blanket of ignorance needed so badly right now. To hide away from the hard facts. That was Elsa's treasured boat, her most cherished object. The very object which was obviously abandoned in rushed decisions unfolding underneath the raging storm; sacrificing her most beloved possession the moment she decided to dive after Anna.
The tide was so rough, and the thin carbon fiber casing of a Single was so fragile. If the boat had by any means escaped the torrential riptide pulling out to the fjord and had actually made it back to shore, there was very little chance that it would have survived in one piece.
The Nokk. Elsa's majestic Single; custom made, custom designed, the highest caliber racing shell. The primary thing linking her very soul to the sport.
Gone. Instantly.
Because of her.
It felt like someone had punched her in the gut; winded. She felt absolutely awful. As the pieces kept revealing themselves, piling up, she realized how terribly she messed up, and all in one day. Her fist clenched tightly at her side, the other hand coming across to hold her elbow in a shielding pose.
"I.. I'm so sorry.." Her head was bowed deeply with the bend in her shoulders, tears feeling like little painful pricks as she began the mournful process of accepting the loss. Or rather, Elsa's loss. Her usually bubbly voice cracked despite herself. "It's all my fault.."
She heard a sudden call of her name with whispers, and a light hand came to rest on the back of her shoulder blade; tiny words meant to be calming. But they came too late, or maybe they would never have been enough anyway. She was already crying. Pathetic, sniffling, crying.
Two pale hands had raised to her shoulders now, the body pressed near her side, still murmuring soft words to lessen her woes. They were truly nothings to her ears. Anna felt a gentle pressure, guiding; the only thing she could even process. Soon they were seated again on the not-so-comfortable couch, but she didn't care.
The arms held her, words barely discernible. "Hey, hey.. shh.. don't. It's okay.. it's okay." She felt the gentle hands move from her shoulders and wrap around her in a comforting side hug. "Shhh.. It's not your fault."
Tan hands flew to her flushed cheeks, palms wiping blindly at the wet streaks marring her usually bright expression. "But it is! You told us to go back, and then you told me to stop but I went too far even though the winds changed.. you gave up your boat because of me. If only I.. I.." If only I hadn't been so dumb..
Her breath hitched. Oh God, what if Elsa held this against her; so angered and dismayed by her idiot irresponsible partner, tired of cleaning up the disaster Anna always brought around, that she'd up and go. Their relationship had already been rockier than the tidal waves tonight, so how much would it really take to break them apart at this point?
She pulled her arms in to herself, hunching and hugging, sniffling loudly at the discomforting thought, voice watery as she squeaked, "Please don't hate me."
The hushing noises ceased, caressing hands halting as well. A single word of question soon followed but fell away. The grasp firmed up, causing Anna to lift her head in the slightest, more in startle. She could see the dark blue eyes staring intensely back at her.
"I could never hate you. Especially over something like this," she said definitively. Anna's lip only quivered more, unable to accept something like that. Elsa brought her face closer. "And it's just a boat. Don't worry." The concern caused another sob to bubble up.
"But you put everything into it.. and you lost it for my sake. Because I was so stupid!"
Elsa seemed to take a second to collect her words, still thrown by how much guilt the redhead was demonstrating, almost unsure where to begin the seemingly obvious response. "I'd give up that boat, and any other material thing in my life, over and over again, if it meant you were safe, Anna." At the shamefaced sea green eyes, Elsa tried to smile reassuringly as best as she could at the battered expression, but the broken spirit made it hard. "I swear."
There was a weak sniffle. "But.. why?"
Elsa really almost laughed, giving the teenager a near incredulous look. "Seriously? A boat or your life?" Examining the sincere, remorseful face in front of her, Elsa sighed sadly, hand subconsciously resting over top of the other woman's. "God, Anna, how can you even-"
"-Would you have given it up for anyone?" The interruption made sapphire eyes widen.
"I-I, well.." She blinked, then looking away a few seconds later, fingers coming to worry the end of her long braid. "It was too automatic, I didn't even think to consider.. I couldn't." The distant thought was expressed in her tone and eyes as her gaze was brought back. "All I knew was.. was.. " She paused, voicing halting, and she swallowed, and Anna could hear the slight hitching breath at their close proximity. "You mean too much to me."
Really? Did she? The next words were the tiniest that Anna had ever known to fall from her mouth. "Why, then?"
The older student tilted her head, searching the downcast face. Taking the time to decode the implication, she finally had to shake her head. "I don't know what you mean."
The younger girl looked up, confused teary eyes containing a fragmented sadness, looking through the blonde's incisive orbs. "If you'd give up your boat so easily, if you care about me that much, then why.." She tilted her head to the bemused drawing of blonde brows. "Why did you pull away before? From.. us?"
That caught the blonde off guard, even more than before, kilting her unwavering reports.
Elsa was silent for a long while after that question, pleading; keen gaze indicating that she was picking every one of her words very very carefully. "It's.. I'm.." Her voice caught after the starting word, weak sigh soon trailing behind it. Finally, with azure eyes looking down to her clenched hands, she frowned almost broken-heartedly. "I'm just always afraid of messing everything up.."
You and me both, Anna found herself thinking ironically on an agreeing whim. "But you could never," Anna said softly, the words doing nothing to prevent the immediate head shake.
"No, it's true, and I always will somehow," Elsa muttered, annoyingly devout in her words. "And we should leave it at that." Her jaw clenched, tendon's visible in the light glow around them.
Anna stared over a long silence, studying the apprehensive profile before her, heart aching at the depressed and sincere face. The woman's name left her lips as quietly as a prayer before she continued saying, "When will you see yourself as I see you?"
The blonde looked up sharply, expression filling with regret at the blue undertones of Anna's voice. An automatic apology seemed to hang on her tongue for causing such a problematic moment, and given recent days, Anna almost expected it to fall; apology after apology. But instead, the Senior's lips drew tight, just barely lifting in the corners. Even in the dimly lit room and as the taller girl tucked her head down toward her chest, the light blush was perceivable, contrasting the lightly lidded blue eyes glancing at her.
"I think the same of you.."
The younger rower felt her heart constrict at the near inaudible whisper, a tingle shocking her to her senses at the sight.
The silence was thick around them. Neither woman seemed willing to take the lead here; neither sure really where they could go, or if they should.
Anna continued to stare at the other woman. She gently chewed her lip, still so knocked by the exchange that she had no means to gather her feelings into thoughts nor words.
"I was so scared.."
The tiniest of whispers floated between the pair, breaking the prolonged quiescence settling in the room. Anna blinked up toward the Senior, teal eyes rounding as her chest tightened at the words' meaning. A short but powerful admission.
Elsa's head was bowed, deeply, her lip drawn anxiously between perfect white teeth. Those beautiful navy eyes were aimed toward the thinly carpeted floor, but the purpose in her gaze was unmarked. Seconds ticked, lengthy and waning, the blonde woman taking her sweetest time to bide any potential flaws to her words, collecting herself as best as she could. Anna knew enough to not interrupt.
"I really thought that.." There was a disbelieving shake of her head, so miniscule and trifling, but still present. She took a slow breath, but it did little more than subdue a tremor in her chosen words. "That you weren't.. you wouldn't.." Thick lashes closed as she inhaled again, intention of expressing her deepest morbid fears clear as day amidst the broken phrases. "I thought I had lost you."
She could have continued, Anna acutely mused while she absorbed the pain radiating from the blonde; easily added an additional 'and it would all be my fault', something almost expectant from the constant barrage of guilt the blonde insisted on bearing. Instead, like a swan song, the phrase stood alone; its towering meaning, heavy and lopsided in their disorienting processing, but nonetheless revealing just how much Elsa had been shaken. Nothing mattered more. Not guilt, not reason. Nothing beyond that momentary fear of loss; loss greater than any other the battle-worn champion had faced.
The finality that that particular statement contained was too much.
Anna watched the always composed woman grasp for her trained decorum; her ability to keep face in even the most horrid of conversations, to come out sounding more refined and demonstratingly stronger than any other human ever would. It hurt to watch Elsa desperately trying to pull herself together now. After all that. All alone, both while living that waking nightmare as well as trying to conceal the same lingering effect now.
But she wasn't in this alone this time. By the grace of fate, Anna was here with her.
Anna had come to realize that there was a lot that both of them were avoiding saying right now, unable to muster the mental strength to deal with the emotional drag of an undertow while the crashing waves rolled through their wounded hearts. She knew the necessity of discussions to come tomorrow when they both had enough energy to will themselves forward.. But this was now.
Gently, she reached out and collected a cool hand into her own. In all of Anna's previous experience, she anticipated the action to draw a surprised gaze from the older girl, but not tonight. The touch, silent but meaningful, must have spoken everything that Elsa needed to hear.
She felt the taller woman lean into her, shoulders contiguously flush as her head came to tilt into Anna's own. They stayed close, relishing in the renewed time they were both thankful to being gifted. Anna turned slightly, pink lips gingerly grazing over the smooth skin of a sculpted cheek; lingering for an uncounted period, reminiscent.
Anna didn't even realize what her body was doing until she felt her lips warming against the other's cheek. She leaned back slightly, glancing up and saw widening blue eyes turn to look into her own, faces so close. She could taste the sharp exhale ghosting over her lips with the near inaudible echo of her name.
Outside, a bright flash glowed, room illuminating; both women's faces lit up brilliantly, starry eyed stares catching for the briefest second. The brightness was immediately followed by a sudden high pitched click. The lone light in the dimly lit lounge flickered once. Twice. Darkness. Barely a few seconds had passed in the shadowy room when the event was followed by a large rumble, crashing hard; ripping through the heavens overhead.
Then, finally, stillness.
Anna swallowed in that moment, forward actions catching up to her brain, awareness awaking at the cracking roar. She felt a sweat break at the nape of her neck as the close proximity crashed into her. Oh..
Teal eyes blinked slowly, fluttering like falling autumn leaves while Elsa gazed right back; those deep ocean pools acting as a mirror, reflecting the same wondering look. So bemused yet longing, both breaths baited beneath the dancing shadows. But the longer those sparkling eyes held, Anna's hold of the present gradually diminished. As it did, she found that her small sense of logic and foresight were tossed aside; the tumultuous sea of concern for repercussions dissipating like steam as a fire burst alight in her chest.
How long it took to close that expansive gap of centimeters, neither woman would be able to, nor care to recall. Just as Anna's eyes had fallen closed, she was swept up in a cool zephyr; the divine taste of winter that she had sorely missed. The tingles instantly sparking along her lips were like the gentle flurrying of a fresh snow on her warm face, and the more time that passed had Anna craving more of that electric jolt; wishing for a flurrying snowstorm, whirling and building her to an avalanche.
Her hands had long since found their way to the thick hair, bodies turned toward one another, torsos close; pushing, pulling. She could feel those trusted hands falling down her forearms before smoothing down her sides, holding her trim waist modestly, though securely.
The last time Anna had felt this intensity of heat spike from their joined lips, she'd been engulfed in the rhythm of a dance floor; the deafening roar of music wrapping them up amidst a sea of endless strangers, lights brightly flashing above them. This time, the air was crisp, the dim light from outside hardly enough to see anything beyond their immediacy; tactile senses sharing all that was needed. Inside the silence, the accompanying pounding of rain on the roof and shared heart beats seemed even louder than a stereo's pulsating bass.
Finally, somewhere when she felt her body fall back against the worn plush of the aged couch and the body that brought her to this spot retracted slightly, Anna was pulled out of the beating reverie. Her eyes slowly opened and adjusted to the limited lighting of the room. She was focused on the woman seated nearly straddled over her hips; how the occasional lightning flashes illuminated Elsa's stunning features so brilliantly, hair shining as silvery as platinum; skin so fine.
But it was the look in those shining sapphire stones..
It wasn't anything how Anna imagined, nor even (quite literally) dreamed, this whole situation really. There wasn't that desiring, ardor filled expression; familiar blue eyes filling with a profound need or cast under a lustful haze. There wasn't the rough grasping of clothes or fast touches of skin brought about by months of all of these bottled up emotions, suddenly unleashed in a rushed, heated ache of fervor. It was absolutely nothing of the sort.
Elsa was there, kneeling over Anna's splayed body; normally poised muscular shoulders slightly hunched as pale hands rested tightly folded in her lap. Those strong eyes, ever powerful like rolling ocean waves, were instead shimmering like a motionless lake under a moonlit night, but with an anxious riptide swelling just beneath the surface.
No matter how uncharacteristic of the woman she'd come to know, gosh, right here, right now, with everything swirling around them, that meek disposition was somehow different, and, oddly, oh so.. endearing.
Those dark eyes gazed down into Anna's sparkling cerulean ones, and Anna felt compelled to reach out without a second glance. The back of her knuckles grazed over the delicate skin before gently molding to cup Elsa's pale cheek, basking in the response as the blonde gently tilted her head into the touch a second later. Anna carefully moved her hand further, pushing back the stray blonde tresses that fell over the helix of the woman's ear, and then trailed lightly down the thick braid draped over the front of her shoulder.
Only then did Anna drop her gaze, eyes falling to where her hand stopped on the tie that held the magnificent hair together. Feeling a rush of confidence from Elsa's pliant behavior, she gently pulled the elastic down the remaining tuft of hair. The action caused the brilliant silvery locks to fall loose immediately upon the relinquished hold. Taking careful time, tan fingers gently pushed the strands apart, loosening the braid while trailing back up the path in which they came; fingers intermittently brushed the chilled skin of a collar bone below their tips. Anna's eyes drifted upwards once more and paused.
Elsa's eyes had closed, blonde brows drawn upward in the slightest as she seemed to be steadying her breath; nervous. Anna stared at the expression, hand stilling in its movements, knowing full well what must be racing through Elsa's brain. She took her other hand and brought it to Elsa's own, covering the still tightly clasped pair in a warm grasp. This new touch caused the older girl to open her eyes, bringing her gaze back to the redhead. Giving a welcoming smile back, Anna gently squeezed Elsa's fingers where they rested awkwardly on her lap. The instant stretched long, waiting.
Elsa gave her a look, the flash of fear lit in her eye. Fear to proceed.. "Anna.. this isn't.. I can't be that..".. and yet, fear to retreat.
Her voice was doubtful and overtly vacillating, but those undertones were only half-hearted; the conflicted woman looked pained as she fought to summon words that wouldn't appear.
The redhead eased her fingers into the lusciously freed locks framing the woman's temple, still cradling the woman's head, as the other hand wound around her neck, gently letting her thumb massage light circles into the tense trapezius muscles at the base of her skull; the gentle kneading almost physically undoing the tension etched in Elsa's pensive expression.
Cerulean eyes watched as the Senior's resolve teetered between pursuing her words of contestation to submitting to the event blossoming between them. Just now. This one time.
Just once.
Anna's gaze became half-lidded as she felt her whole heart catch in her throat at the bittersweet realization; the possibility that this living dream really may, and probably would, become just a fantastical memory, never to be touched ever again no matter how much she wished. The burn at her eyes stung and she desperately swallowed down the growing dryness in her throat.
If this was her only chance.. if this was it.. just this once.. if only for..
"Tonight," she breathed in a yearning whisper, want dripping from each syllable; neither asking nor demanding, never to pressure. Only stating, sharing. Her eyes were all but groveling for Elsa to just simply stay.
She watched those beautiful azure eyes twinkle magically despite the minuscule glimpses of light, crackle of bright lightning outside taking a second to highlight the rower's gorgeous face. As did her muscles under Anna's massaging touch, her trepid appearance had also begun to relax, more and more, second by second.
Following a contemplative delay, Elsa slowly relented, nodding delicately with her head tipping into a cordial bow, eyes sliding closed as she then leaned into Anna's warm supporting touch. Elsa's hand rose and closed over Anna's, pale fingers threading as if one with peachy flesh cupped against her face, and then she carefully leaned forward again. Anna could feel the puff of breath nearing her lips linger for a cautious moment and Anna fruitfully restrained herself from capturing the temptation with her own.
When those eyes opened again, catching Anna's own dark gaze, the hesitancy had bled away leaving nothing but something.. receiving. Elsa softly smiled, surrendering.
"Tonight."
Something akin to a flare erupted inside her chest at the confirmation; that she was not alone in her thoughts, that for a night they could just be. No longer heeding any more restraint, Anna was weak to the tempting urge; drawing the blonde back in to a hot kiss, deepening it swiftly.
The elite rower was pulled close, bodies shifting, legs entwining. Kisses and caresses, nothing but finding each other, alone in their universe, blanketed by the night's shadows.
Frosty lips slid away, kissing the sweetest of butterfly kisses up along Anna's jawline before taking a daring second to barely graze her earlobe. And boy did that get her. Anna couldn't stop the sharp gasp of the simple act, the sensation one she'd never been gifted before. She wasn't sure if Elsa gaining knowledge of this sensitive spot was a blessing or a curse, because the leading woman seemed glad to repeat the tiny touch over and over and over, causing Anna to squirm and flex below each time; hips shifting, entangled body firmly pressed against her.
After an eternity of having her blessed curse be wondrously exploited, Elsa gave her tingling ears a respite. Instead, her lips moved down the curve of Anna's neck, slow and open mouth kisses moving at a deliberately idle pace, inch by inch, until finally landing at a dastardly sensitive spot where her muscle slid into her clavicle; living there beside the connection point for longer than necessary, but God Anna was not complaining as her fingers wound through fine platinum hair.
In her clouded mind, she distantly wondered how on Earth the sweet and socially awkward Elsa could be so educated on every fucking erogenous zone on her body. Sure the older woman probably had more experience in the matter.. no, what was she thinking, she definitely had more experience. Anna was the one severely lacking in the direction they were heading; a onetime tryst in high school with a short-term boyfriend she never loved, and never anything beyond make-outs otherwise..? With an education as minimal as that, of course she'd not know anything comparatively close.
The belittling acknowledgement of her mind's chatter only became more talkative when Elsa moved her lips away from rapidly heating skin and Anna's haze dissipated for a moment; her hand subconsciously tightening its hold within the thick flaxen locks as she tried to steady her anxieties.
Would Elsa be able to tell her inexperience? Sure, Anna had been the one initiating the majority of their intimacy before, all those heated kisses and touches, but functionally that was basically the same as what she'd come to know. And, okay, yeah, Google had been a great ally, and her hottest dreams were also a playground to explore her craziest ideas, but now being presented with this.. the real thing.. with the woman she wanted to always see the best of her..
It was a few seconds before she realized that the blonde's face was hovering over her own once more, deep navy eyes half lidded, but clear enough to read the question.
"What are you thinking about?" came the whisper above her, lips close enough to feel the warm breath, but too far to savor a taste. Of freaking course Elsa would sense something was off.
Freckles grew dark at the sincere concern as the heat flushed her face, teeth coming to bite her lower lip in a bashful manner.
"Uh. Just that.." She paused, picking her words, letting her hands free to slide down to Elsa's biceps, fingers worrying a bit of the fabric over the area. Her chin tucked down as she felt the ultimate shyness overtake her, barely breathing out. If this is only for tonight, then.. "I want this to be perfect.." Her eyes widened as she heard her words. Wait, shit, did I seriously say that? Too much. Yep. Yep yep yep. Totally too much. Dear God why was she saying this out loud.. At a sensitive time like this? She refused to look up at the Senior, not wanting to confirm the concerned gaze extending from the undoubtedly ruined moment.
"I.. was thinking the same." The young red head briefly glanced up at the gentle, equally self-conscious words, seeing those same eyes, cool blue yet revealing warmth at heart, with an unsure hint of a smile mirroring Anna's own. "But you're here, so, I think it already is."
Okay, for real, did she actually die earlier? Because there's no way she's anywhere but in heaven right now. Her heart slammed in her chest, wind sucked from her lungs, feeling so overcome by emotion at the words and, even in the dark, by seeing the fuchsia blush dusting Elsa's snowy skin.
Simply hearing, knowing, seeing that her partner's mindset was the same as her own cleared her only residual worries. Tan hands rushed to seize those high structured cheeks, pulling the woman's face in close and kissing her so hard on the lips that tears sprinkled in the corners of her eyes at the intensity. They stayed like this for a long time, reveling; the kiss itself a promise of care. One Anna wanted to put all of her love into, hoping that by actions alone that Elsa would begin to have some idea of just how much she meant to the younger rower.
Anna felt the steady, calloused hands trail down, travelling from her collar to the sides of her ribs, thumbs sliding gently over her chest ever so lightly during the passage, but it was sensed quite well enough; she knew she could be felt through the flimsy t-shirt fabric and unpadded sports bra, and she even had a fleeting thought that maybe choosing the padded bra would have saved her the embarrassment of such an easy read. But this was short-lived.
As her loose shirt raised slowly, the deft fingers danced slowly up her abdomen, taking time to slide over every crevice of her flexed muscles; counting each dint, tracing every outline, ingraining the details and appreciating ever so masterfully. But that shockingly cold touch had Anna's mind swirling, recalling the events having unfolded barely hours prior. The fact that both women could have lost so much, lost each other, lost themselves completely. She swallowed down the lump peaking in her throat, a small hiss passing her lips instead as the cool finger tips dipped over her belly-button. No matter the events of earlier, the thoughts of the here and now had her pulse racing more than ever, and she reacted in kind.
Hands that had previously been content to rest over the perfect masterpiece of sculpted shoulder blades quickly flew to the bottom of the Senior's shirt, wasting no time and giving little warning of the sudden yanking. Breaking the kiss, the fabric was pulled up, causing blue eyes to momentarily widen until the clothing had covered her face, arms being stretched up with next to no resistance. But once the ocean orbs were obscured, it was Anna's turn to feel her eyes go wide, attention snatched even faster than her brash movements had just been; the full sight bestowed in front of her, centimeters from her face, was nothing less than astounding.
She had always appreciated Elsa's brilliant anatomy, this anatomy, mostly visually from afar, occasionally felt flush through the barrier of clothing, but never like this. Dear lord, her wildest dreams had severely underestimated the magnificence, and she was certainly far from prepared for the spike in her desire.
As Elsa was distractedly given the task of finishing the shirt removal, Anna having let her hands fall away prematurely due to a new fixation, she brought her freckled face forward and pressed an open mouth kiss along the seductive crevice of soft cleavage. The blonde woman let out a quiet yelp in surprise, teetering slightly, managing to toss the tangled shirt off her arm as her free arm desperately caught her flailing body; palm landing on the armrest beside Anna's head. The younger girl's pleased smirk was evident and it only grew more playful at the daring glint sparking in the blonde athlete's eyes.
If Anna had learned anything, the most minimal anything imaginable about Elsa, then it was the girl's inability to ignore a competition where due. Much like Anna herself, Elsa would gladly meet her in any challenge.
And, of course it would be met with the most grandeur example of chivalrous ardor imaginable.
Within Anna's wrapping arms, the older rower gave a little wiggle of a smirk before delving her lips to the sharp collar bone again; taking full advantage of the learned sensitive spot, and Anna breathed a weak curse in response. Elsa trailed the kisses slowly outward to the curve of her partner's shoulder, touches thoughtful but firm; delicate and searching. As if enjoying the scenic route, the kisses traveled down the pale vein markers of Anna's forearm to her wrist where Elsa paused, letting her lips linger over the delicate skin; Anna could feel the cool press vibrate against her thrumming pulse point below. She was utterly swooning, so befallen, and seriously, who wouldn't be at such a charming move.
During the focus on her slender wrist, Anna all but missed the maneuvers leading to her own shirt riding up and eventually falling to a similar fate as Elsa's own, cast off to the dark floor, somewhere farthest from care; the thin sports bra joining the journey to the unknown barely a minute later.
Agile fingers had done away with the small ties at Anna's braids, sending the untamable red threads free; hands taking time, as had Anna's, to separate the lush orange waves with one eventually winding to cradle the young woman's head.
With an arching motion, Anna sighed at the soothing movements, feeling fingernails scraping in the slightest against her scalp. Ready lips had already begun peppering the exposed area of her chest, circular patterns forming a tangled web across the peachy surface, dancing around the pink centers so purposefully. And when Anna did feel the warmth pass over and around, her sigh morphed to a squeak. Her hands loosely played over the blonde's head, gently guiding, urging the attention where needed.
She was in Heaven by the delight, touch so pure and invigorating; pleasant tingles more than she could have imagined. Maybe she couldn't discount it as Hell, the rising fire inside her billowing with smoky desire, absolutely undoing her; those kisses, licks, and nips drunkenly driving her toward insanity.
Slender digits, smoothly sliding between them, separated the flush contact of their thighs, replacing the warmth with a silken trailing movement, so skillful as they passed underneath the threshold of her only remaining clothing article; chilled touch so saccharine, as if leaving a trail of delicious caramel drizzle along its path, until allowed to pool at Anna's sweetest point. The petite woman bit her lip tightly between her teeth to stifle a stuttered breath, inhale sharp through her nose while auburn lashes fluttered dreamily in that instant.
Elsa's rhythm was slow, so slow, achingly glacial, but taking the moment for Anna to settle her tiny shivers of expectance; encouraging the young woman to set the pace, hips beginning to rock like the rolling river wakes on a lovely autumn morning. The older woman's lips continued to gently work around the pink peaks on her chest as Anna rolled her head to the side and down, lips lazily trailing over the blonde's temple just barely within her reach.
The blonde made her way down the open expanse of tanned skin just as carefully and meticulously as she had been moving all night, giving each corner of the tanned body its own rightful attention. Anna was in a blissful haze, body moving so languidly with every passing second, steady against a tempo Elsa was always so magnificently trusted to maintain. The purposeful kisses, set on identifying each and every freckle across her skin's constellations, piercing hot zings radiating out from each caress and every subtle drawling scratch of a finger nail holding her waist.
It was the small nip at the protruding curve of her hipbone that had Anna lifting her head up in surprise, only then truly realizing how far down the blonde rower had traveled.
Cool red lips, frosted like a winter rose, moved down over her bared thigh, tracing over the same sweet trail still tingling from before, leaving Anna wiggling and anticipating by the oddly tickling touch.
The following minutes were a blur, with Anna distantly recognizing the break of pace, loving hands coming to hook the fabric down and away. And when she felt the warmth of a tongue press against her, really against her, Anna was weak to fight the throaty groan unbiddenly ripping through her throat, nor the sharp buck of her hips. Not until the sensational pressure was replaced with the feeling of an amused smile, causing her cyan eyes to shoot downwards. Thankfully the flood of embarrassment was dammed near instantly as she felt the more approving motions continue, causing her to tip her head back with another deep inhale.
As the steady and smooth ministrations continued, each move ranging from a feathered breath to a gifted kiss and more, an understanding enveloped her and Anna couldn't stop herself from utterly melting at the knowledge. Elsa was worshiping her, placing deliberate touches and kisses everywhere but never letting them lose contact for more than a millisecond; as if Anna could simply disappear without a trace from beneath her hands.
Her free fingers slid from their fascinated home on snowy shoulders and blindly gripped the couch's cushion, firmly squeezing the fabric pressed into her shoulder, cheek tilting into her wrist in a weak attempt to stifle her whimpers. Her other fingers clung to what she could reach of Elsa's muscular shoulders, finding hold within the magnificent sulci fissuring beneath porcelain skin.
She wasn't sure when her body had begun rocking more rapidly, irregularly, against the unwavering tempo, nor sure when her breathing had become so labored; time utterly lost on her. She could feel the coordination of her muscles becoming a struggle; her grip on the other woman slipping as she desperately fought for connection. To keep the woman as physically with her as possible.
With a gentle but swift motion, she felt her hand be taken, familiar slender fingers previously supporting at her waist now lacing between them and resting the much needed bond along her hip; the action never once interrupting the disjointed metrical dance they'd created.
Fair skinned fingers remained threaded through her own, holding them so assuredly even as Anna's grasp only continued to tighten, almost painfully so; fingernails grazing over knuckles, intensifying with the vise-like lock. Two dark blue eyes sparkling back up at her, filled with incredible passion.. and sincere adoration.
Loving her.
All of her.
Only her.
Anna felt herself coming undone, quickly fraying the edges of her psyche; body clenching more and more and more.. Her nerves, crackling with electricity, instantly burned like lightning strikes, searing down her legs and then up to her throat. Arching her back and slamming her eyes closed, her voice hitched, a sharp gasp tearing past her tight vocal cords. With a tremble, reverberating outwards from inside of her and sending rippling tremors coursing up and down her body, Anna let out a constricted whine. As her voice was lost in the air, her lips quietly savored Elsa's name in one final gasp, as if it was the sweetest sprinkle of sugar she'd ever tasted, before submerging into bliss.
Blanketed by the warm quilt cover received from release, she gradually slowed her hips' erratic motions; just lightly rhythmically rocking against the stilled hand as she rode out the residual waves passing under her heated skin. Breathing ragged, she kept her eyes shut, feeling how hard her pulse was rushing; heart hammering in her ears.
She tucked her face sideways into the couch's fabric, trying to steady her breathing while savoring the emanating heat around her body. Hiding away, she fought the rising sense of shyness starting to pry into her growing awareness.
The body moving from below her is what stirred her to attention, a little unwelcome chill coming from the short lived separation. It surprised her enough to turn away from the soft encasing just in time to see the blonde woman maneuver her way back up her body in as nimble a means as possible on the narrow sofa's space.
And dear lord, as she came back up, Anna simply could not account the glowing radiance around the blonde's face as secondary to her mind's post-climax haze. Elsa was literally a goddess; and ethereal spirit. Nothing could convince her otherwise.
Lidded midnight blue eyes looked down at her, face hovering just above with porcelain cheeks flushed red. By the tilt of her brows, she looked in question. Anna could only think of one thing to abate the concern.
Hands folding over high arched cheeks, she pulled the older woman's face back down to her own in a clumsy yet gentle manner, lips sealing the silent exchange; a taste to savor.
Taking a daring action while Elsa seemed to relax into the kiss, Anna pushed herself up, fighting her body up and grabbing to wield control. A couple of short breaths were exchanged in transitory frustration and confusion, but ultimately Anna had succeeded in her endeavor. She stared down at the exposed blonde woman now laying beneath her, layered under the dark night's shadows, but beautiful curves managed to catch just the right highlights.
Still riding her own high, her moves were quick, kiss placements spread and touches dragged in a pleasing haze, every move drawing from whatever memory she could pull up after Elsa's own splendid performance; each step, an elegantly choreographed ballet Anna wanted to gracefully emulate.
Butterfly kisses, fluttering in all directions; cheeks, throat, collar. Dragging caresses leading to swirling indiscernible patterns, striking each lateral divot of her muscles. Lips lingering for a stay to explore a valley of the softest skin. Hands holding firm, thumbs lovingly brushing to sweetly sensitive areas. The bell-like whimpers chiming from each and every act, hypnotic.
Unclear how or when she found herself here, so dizzyingly lost in herself and each other, Anna's hand gently drifted lower over the delicate sterling curls, leaving a small shudder in its wake crawling up both bodies until she found the long anticipated destination; the jolt of the most intimate moment strong enough to cause both women to gasp, breath exchanged in their shared taste of desire.
Anna then slowly trailed her lips away from silken skin she'd been lavishing, further, every centimeter of alabaster skin offered and hers for the taking; an untouched canvas allowing her a chance to paint every emotion kept in her heart. Trying to keep her excited motions at a calm tempo, she kissed down the rigid angles of firm abdominals, venturing hints of a nip here and there, adding blemishing pink to the pristine flesh but mostly just languorously drawing tiny patterns of with her tongue; savoring. Further she moved, bending along the vaulted hip bone, as slowly as she could allow herself upon hearing the gradual increase in breathing; feeling short inhales and trembling exhales resound beneath her lips. The slick perspiration was salty but sweet on her tongue; another swirl of the taste, clearing the skin bare again.
She wanted more. Under the panting breaths, her steady hand having dared to up the rate just a tick, she found herself swallowing in exhilaration. Cyan eyes looked from her spot hovering just above the woman's navel, the supine view more gorgeous than any manmade masterpiece or even natural wonder could ever hope to compare.
Her head bent down again, lips intent on their way with gentle touches and little loving bites, moving slowly around the curve the smooth joint to the soft but powerful leg. She was following in each and every step that Elsa had led in, as she always had, as she always would; following Elsa in hopes to match her heartbeat for heartbeat, stroke for stroke. To be the best she could be for the best she'd ever known.
"Wait.."
The shaky voice roared through the peaceful ambiance of the room, making Anna immediately freeze in place; hand stilling in its movement and causing a tiny whine to soon follow. Blinking rapidly, she brought her eyes up just to be met with pale fingers slipping behind her ear; cradling the base of her neck. Anna felt the hand lightly tugging her back up.
Teal eyes were wild with fear; afraid that she had somehow done something wrong after she was so sure she had been doing exactly the same as Elsa had.. And especially been doing what she thought Elsa was enjoying. Was she wrong? Did she misread or mishear something? Was Elsa alright?!
She watched the hued cheeks, deeply reddened like a rose garden in bloom. Elsa's eyes looked up at her, half-lidded, gasping breaths flittering through brilliant lips. The guiding hand continued to pull her up until their faces were level. Then, another slender but defined arm slid around her freckled torso, pulling Anna closer, skin to skin, soft chests flush.
"I need you here," her raspy alto voice murmured in a weak pitch, beseeching, dry swallow following close in toe. A sharp breath, mouthed more than spoken, "With me."
Although Elsa had out-performed all of Anna's wildest hopes and fantasies, a cautious yet devastatingly sexy and confident lover, Anna had been so sure she was going to need to do exactly the same to reach the blonde's own high level expectations. But what was she thinking? That rigid competitive side of Elsa was never involved with their intimacy. Never since their relationship had changed.
Anna's eyes watched the longing and revealed expression, understanding truly just how purely nude the woman really was; emotional walls surrounding, her fortress gone, leaving her absolutely defenseless. And although the confident woman was trying to maintain such a brave façade, deep inside she was a timid soul; skittish and battle worn. Anna's heart skipped with her comprehending breath.
Dipping her nose against the beautiful slope of Elsa's own, she gave her the sweetest nuzzle. Both opened their eyes in tandem, bangs brushing as she brought their foreheads close; the horizon stretched from the glorious blue ocean to the cerulean sea, a most splendid of views sparkling peacefully. Anna could only arrive at one phrase that she knew always gave the glorious rower a sense of security; the offering Anna found herself priding that she, and only she, could provide. A genuine, glowing smile spread across her face, giving the subtlest of nods.
"I'm right here."
Their lips met again, slow and soft, assuring and grounding, and Anna carefully resumed her previous ministrations, taking all the time in the world now. If this was to be her first and last night with her beloved goddess wrapped in this embrace, able to be the one causing her to look the way she was, euphoric, willingly coming undone all because of Anna, then by God she was going to make sure Elsa felt every touch, every kiss; everything so that she couldn't deny how deep Anna's love ran.
Resting on her elbow, elegant white arms still wrapped securely around her waist, strong hands splayed and grasping the speckled skin, a tan hand took some lingering time to stroke a flushing cheek tenderly. Anna's hand then delicately moved to slide through the lush platinum hair, holding Elsa just as close. Her other remained south, movements now matched in time to the melody being huskily hummed in her ear; that cadence beginning to falter, staccato beat rising in frequency, the breathy song marvelous.
Unlike Anna, Elsa's sounds in the room were muted, mere breathless whispers as beautifully silent as a winter's falling snow. She could feel the other woman tense below her, muscles pulled taut, champion strength arms cinching around her petite body. The blonde's head curled into the crook of her neck, each breath hitching shorter and shorter, allowing Anna a brief respite to let a kiss linger on the warm shell of her ear in the aggrandizing moment. And again, she softly breathed out the same reassurance once more. "I'm here."
Although unheard, Anna could feel the rumble murmured into her collar, the small puff of hot breath that was quickly gasped back, held so tight, before a heavy shuddered exhale followed; so similar to the heat she felt breathed there after first awakening from reality's nightmare, but where that was a tragic smolder, here the sharp air scorched her skin, bursting like a star in all its mighty and devastating splendor.
The tense body below her slowly relaxed following the length of the exhale, fiber by fiber, every muscle spent like the aftermath of a race. The heat was mellowed, wafting between their glistening forms. A kiss was pressed against the woman's temple, blonde strands tickling at Anna's cheeks in a way that brought a smile to her face.
And as the time passed, steady but too instantly, Anna felt a shudder; a tremble in her arms. The hands around her waist traveled upwards, crossing to form a close hold; fingers firmly grasping at the small area over her shoulder blades. The motion and closeness caused Anna herself to fall forward a bit, her own hands finding a home below the blonde's shoulders.
Despite the closeness, the tiny shivers could still be felt; the heated breathing came in short puffs now, still heating her skin but in an unmatched beat of hitched shudders. Anna turned her nose inwards to the slender neck, nuzzling just beneath the crook of her jaw.
She knew what the change in behavior meant. She didn't need to hear it. Not when she, too, heard the phrase in her own mind having heard it all those minutes ago when she was also riding the waves of heaven and back, and returning to the front of her mind now. As the thunder continued to boom outside, sheering pour of rain slamming the window, their shared internal exchange was loudest of all.
"I can't lose you."
Tears wouldn't be shed here, although Anna teetered very very near doing so. They had come so close, too close, to befalling such an untimely loss and it churned inside both women with veracity worse than even the outside storm could have thrown at them. And in the afterglow of this marvelous night, it was too perfect an occasion for tears; to succumb to the dread and miserable reminders now embedded into two sets of memories.
Instead, Anna gently pressed kisses absently around the small vicinity within her reach. Simple reassurances. Because that's what Elsa needed. What they both needed. Right now, they needed nothing more than each other.
Eventually, as the breathing below her evened out, Anna let her spent body ease into the strong arms, never having released from their woven embrace around her frame, and Anna would gladly keep it that way. Her muscles ached something awful, blissful haze from the masking endorphins dissipating all to quickly.
She snuggled into the body, usually feeling so unnaturally cool, but the warmest thing ever right now; a puzzle piece perfectly fitted with her own. She wished she wasn't the only one to notice.
Anna's head was centered on the bare chest; silky skin to rest upon, ear pressed against the woman's sternum. Below, she could hear the powerful muscle still thudding in excess, a beat above the calm steady pace Elsa always maintained at baseline. Its song was thunderous, rival to the stormy heavens above; a song that she could listen to forever. A beat she'd memorize and follow in time.
It was not an accidental omission how she did not meet the blonde's eyes when they came back from the paradise high, nor as they rode the woe-some waves of the all too recent what if's and could have been's.
The aftermath was unfolding after an undeniable heat of the moment catalyst reaction. She did not want to risk anything breaking the dream-like escape; breaking this connection. She didn't want to see the night's mysterious spell break in front of her eyes. Not this night. Anything but tonight. She wanted to live in this moment for as long as possible, uninterrupted, as Elsa been hard-pressed to insist upon in the past; relish every millisecond of how wonderful everything was. Here. Now. How everything could be.
As she lay there in the quiet of the room, she silently prayed that Elsa would allow them to remain like this, wrapped within each other. Continue to let them be vulnerable, together.
Distantly, she felt one of the protective arms leave her and for a fleeting instant, her heart stuttered in concern, jitters getting the better of her. But not a minute later, she noticed the forgotten blanket draped on the couch come sliding over her shoulders, encasing them both comfortably. The additional warmth was welcoming but the closeness and presence of the non-retreating body beneath her was all the more important.
She wasn't sure how much time had passed, curled into a warm cocoon, but the physical and emotional events of the long day and even longer night had finally caught up; the most beautiful beat she'd ever known steadily lulling her to sleep amidst the storm's white noise. As she danced on the precipice of leaving one fantastical dream scape to follow slumber's own, she felt a fair, cool pressure against her temple.
A kiss goodnight, or a kiss of a promise? Perhaps both, perhaps more. She cautioned her hope to soar too high, too far, while her emotions were a jumble, but perhaps, if only for tonight, she'd allow the indulgence.
Anna smiled contentedly at the thought and let herself fall away into the depths of darkness once more; confident in the red string lifeline securely tied around her heart.
-End Chapter 31-
THEY DID THE THING! Friggin' finally. *heaves sigh*
Whelp, if the heavy use of imagery wasn't evidence enough, this was my first time ever attempting to write an adult scene. "Why include it, then, Sista? You could have done a cut-away or shorten the scene (to less than 10 pages, or less than 25% of this chapter)." My answer is no. These girls friggin' worked for this, and dammit we all did too. They deserved to have each moment between them memorialized and get absolute emotional MAGIC *throws heart shaped confetti*.
The real question should be who is surprised I made it actually happen at the boathouse, of all places? xD
FEELS Warning: Next chapter is a crescendo chapter where we will close this Arc and then enter the last Arc of the story.. given how emotional and anxiety filled this last Arc has been, I feel this needs to be prefaced before going into next chapter. I promise its ending is worth it :)
(Real Talk Health Note: never submerge someone with suspected Hypothermia in hot water; gradually warm them up or you can accidentally shock the system and risk cardiac arrest!)
Thanks for reading!
