DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. The cat takes care of my professional portfolio. He's the one in the vest. You can go to him with any financial matters. But be careful – he bites.
Here is an especially chunky portion of the story. This was one of the harder chapters. But despite nursing school trying to kill me, this part is about as finished as the rest that I've posted, and I want to encourage y'all to stay the fuck away from people. Not safe right now, guys, but it's the perfect time to chill at home and read some twilight fanfiction B)
Also, I just cross-posted this on Wattpad, so if you like that platform better you can look it up. I encourage you to share any thoughts you may have while reading, I'll reply to whatever I can.
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They weren't expecting us to attack. When I jumped towards the tall one, he hopped out of the way at the very last second, and I wound up landing on top of the girl. Her scream tore through the clearing like a church bell cracking in half. I got a mouthful of her hair in my mouth while the other two leeches kept their eyes carefully trained on Jared and Sam.
I can help! Seth exclaimed, leaping forward onto the girl and getting a hold on her arm. She struggled and pulled against him, then with a blood-curdling screech Seth tore her arm clean off.
The other bloodsuckers didn't like it, either. The big one darted into the trees with Sam snapping at his heels. He had the big leech cornered against the cliff-face beneath the ridge and then we could hear him tearing it to pieces, almost simultaneously.
Jared snarled at the tall one, who stared back at him with wide, disbelieving eyes. Just as Jared leaped, the bloodsucker hopped over him and high-tailed it into the trees.
I still had a grip on the girl's head. I was just about to twist it off when Seth bolted into the woods after the tall leech, the girl's arm still in his mouth.
He's getting away! He yipped anxiously, throwing the arm into a nearby bush.
Jared followed quickly after them. I didn't have time to worry about what Leah would have said if she saw her brother fighting one-on-one with a leech. The girl was twisting violently, trying to punch at me from all sides.
For half a second, I wondered if this was one of Bella's friends. Had she known this girl? Gone to lunch with her?
Could I kill her?
Of course I could, physically, kill her. It's what I was made for. I'd done it before, and I would do it again. But would Bella look at me differently if I killed what used to be one of her friends? Someone who got turned into a monster against their will, just like me. Not a vampire who had been alive for a grotesquely long time - a person, a kid my age, who might have a family waiting at home, wondering if they would ever find her body.
It was only half a second. Long enough for her to take advantage of my hesitation. With a terrible ripping sound her head broke free of my jowls, leaving a large chunk of hair on my tongue. I spat it out, bristling at the taste.
I stood up, staring into her blood-red eyes, and realized I could very easily live with myself after I killed this leech. This thing wasn't a person, at least not anymore; it was a monster, a blood-sucking parasite created for the sole purpose of killing my girl.
As I was ripping the girl to pieces, Seth and Jared caught up with the tall leech. Seth lunged at him, grabbing onto his knee and yanking. The bloodsucker reached around and gripped his shoulder, hissing. Seth whined through his teeth as his shoulder got ground up in the leech's palm, but his grip held.
Jared caught up quickly. He leapt over Seth and launched himself right into the tall leech's chest, pushing him to the ground, where they could easily pull his limbs off one by one.
The leeches were obviously inexperienced as far as fighting giant wolves was concerned. Their bodies screeched like nails on a chalkboard as we tore them limb from limb, but we weren't interrupted by the hoard of vampires across the river. Either they didn't hear, or didn't care, but it was enough to give us time to escape with their shredded bodies.
We pulled them apart systematically, and carried the pieces in our mouths back to La Push. Seth's shoulder had been completely crushed, but it healed by the time we got back on the rez. I was glad I wouldn't be the one to tell Leah.
We burned the remains beneath a deserted section of cliffs, curving against a harsh sea in the early morning, just as the first few strokes of light were appearing against the thin veil of pink clouds, hovering in a halo around the sun.
Old Quil made a whole ceremony out of giving each of us three new bags of ashes. He placed them around our necks like he was handing out Olympic medals. Seth was beaming from ear to ear the whole time.
I was impatient. My feet wouldn't stay still, shifting back and forth on the sand until I dug myself ankle-deep into the surf. Billy shot me a disapproving look.
I couldn't help it. My restlessness only got worse when I tried not to fidget; it poked at my stomach like a bird pecking at an old tree.
We had survived the night, somehow. I didn't trust this lucky kill to save us from the fateful battle between us and the army, but it did give me another day with Bella. I had to tell her I wasn't dead as soon as possible, which made Old Quil's wispy tenor voice drag on and on for what felt like hours.
Finally, he released us from his hold, and all but Seth rushed off. He stayed on the beach with Billy, Old Quil, and Sue, watching the noxious purple clouds disappear into the gray sky.
I didn't bother to go home and get the Rabbit; I was faster on foot. The wind blew my long hair behind me with a harsh whipping sound. The forest receded the farther I got into town, and soon I could see Charlie's house through the cracks in the web of branches.
About twenty feet away I was bombarded with possibly the worst shock of my entire life.
There was a bloodsucker at Bella's house – again.
Except this time I wasn't there; and Bella was.
My feet barely touched the ground. I flew out of the trees and through the front door, convulsing from head to toe with the force of my anxiety.
Heart racing, ears pounding, I wasn't sure what I expected to find there. Would it have been worse to find blood spattered on the walls? Could I have handled it if I saw Bella's mangled, bloodless body draped over the back of the couch? Who knows. It didn't matter; because what I found was much, much worse.
Bella sat on the couch next to what appeared, from a distance, to be a porcelain doll. It was small enough to be a miniature statue of a real person, and white enough to be made of marble. It had spiky black hair pointing every which way, and when it's eyes met mine, I growled instinctually at the coal-black irises.
"Jake!" Bella cried, standing up and stumbling over her feet with surprise as she crossed the room.
I couldn't speak. If I did, I might have gagged from the smell. All I could do was stare at her, hoping she would understand the urgency in my eyes.
"This is Alice Cullen," Bella said quickly, crossing the room and grabbing one of my shaking hands.
My eyes darted over to the leech still perched on Charlie's couch. She stared back at me with a frustrated, irate look on her granite face.
"You're alive." She laughed and cracked a smile so wide it looked as if she might burst into song.
I made a face that must have displayed how very happy I was to see her and how very deadly I was at the moment as I stared down the leech sitting on her living room couch, because she ditched the pleasantries and continued explaining why I should care about the bloodsucker's name.
"She had a vision – " Bella continued, rubbing circles into the back of my hand. "You remember how I told you about that? She gets visions of the future, whenever someone makes a decision that puts them on a certain path – she came to warn me about Victoria."
"I didn't realize you were aware of the danger," the parasite chirped from the couch. Her voice was too high, like the sound of shattering glass. It sent shivers up my spine.
Bella blushed, looking down at her feet. "You see, after last night," – her cheeks managed to get even more red – "I thought I would go looking for Victoria, to surrender, and end this once and for all. But Alice saw me stumbling around the woods, and then it suddenly went black – she came to stop me."
I still couldn't talk. Bella's eyes met mine, and I let go of a breath I hadn't realized I was holding. I closed my eyes, letting the air filter through my nose slowly, focusing on the sensation in my chest as my lungs deflated.
"She didn't know about Laurent, or Victoria, or all the missing people… She called Jasper – she says he knows all about this sort of thing – and he's coming back with Carlisle and Esme," Bella whispered.
"More?" I spit through my teeth, eyes flying open, my whole body shivering as if she'd tasered me.
Bella flinched. "They want to help. She says Jasper will know how to defeat Victoria."
I took a deep breath in, but it didn't do any good. The scent washed up my nose like saltwater, burning my sinuses. I shook my head, closing my eyes.
"Jacob, it's okay, they're going to help us," Bella assured, but her words got lost in the fuzzy feeling of rage.
"We have to go," I said abruptly, pulling us across the room in two steps. "I need to tell Sam."
"Why?" Bella asked, planting her feet stubbornly and crossing her arms against her chest.
I huffed, placing my hand on her waist instead when she wouldn't move. "The treaty is still intact. If the Cullens are coming back, we have to change our patrol routes. We can't be caught on enemy land."
"The Cullens aren't enemies!" She hissed angrily, taking another step back.
I took in a deep breath, balling up my shaking hands into angry fists, and turned towards the door. There was nothing else to say; I knew better than to try and talk her out of risking her life.
She stopped me, grabbing a hold on my hand.
"No, Jake –" she started, but I cut her off.
"Bella," I sighed, looking down to see her face.
She was staring up at me imploringly; it was the kind of face I couldn't say no to, no matter how mad I was. I brushed my fingers across her cheek, then leaned down to press a kiss to her forehead.
"Don't worry, honey, I won't be far. I'll come back as soon as…" I trailed off, looking towards the living room, where the leech had craned her neck to watch us.
"You don't have to leave," she insisted. "Alice won't hurt you."
I shook my head. "I can't promise I can control myself with a leech in the room."
Bella scowled. "Alice is one of the good guys. She wouldn't – "
"I love you," I interrupted quickly, squeezing her hand one last time before bolting out the back door.
It wasn't hard to shift into a werewolf. My fury was hot enough to burn the whole damn forest down. The difficult part was stopping myself from bursting through the wall and ripping the leech into shreds. Even so, I couldn't make myself go farther than the back window, listening to the conversation in the living room while Paul and Embry wordlessly ran to get Sam.
"Who was that?" Alice asked, her high voice creaking and lilting like an out-of-tune piano.
"Oh," Bella mumbled, and I could picture the way her cheeks turned red and she looked down at her feet as if I was watching. "That's Jake."
"Is he your boyfriend now?" Alice asked.
"I guess…" She trailed off. "More than that, really. He's my best friend. We were made for each other, sort of. I think… I think that even if you guys had stayed, I would have found him, eventually."
"Do you love him?" Alice whispered, a strange edge to her voice.
"What kind of a question is that?" Bella scoffed. "Of course I do. I'd fight in his place if I could. I always did want to be Superman and not Lois Lane all the time." She snorted. "That's why I decided to surrender myself to Victoria. It's why I'm okay with the pain it will cause me when you leave again – it will hurt just the same as the first time, make no mistake. But I don't care; if it means Jacob lives, I don't care what heartache Edward or any of you give me. I'll go through all of it with a smile. I'll sing and dance for joy when you leave me again, because I know it'll mean he's safe."
The tension slowly faded from my muscles as she spoke, until my shoulders slumped down and hung with regret.
I was a little less pissed off after hearing that. Only a little.
I still didn't like the idea of her letting the leech be so close to her, and I was upset to realize how much she still must have loved the Cullens. The sting was only slightly diminished by her speech, but the fact that she thought getting herself killed would somehow make my life any better was so backwards I didn't see how she could possibly believe it.
"I'm sorry, Bella," Alice whispered in a low tone, as if she knew I was listening. "I'm so, so sorry. I promise we'll make this right. We'll kill Victoria, I swear. She won't harm you, or… or your werewolf, I suppose. But I am glad to see you again. I missed you."
Bella's voice sounded like she was choking back tears. "I missed you, too. More than you know."
Sam joined me, hiding in the trees behind Charlie's house. With a low rumble, I paced away from the window so I would be safely hidden in the damp forest.
The Cullens are back, then?
Sounds like it, I huffed, letting my muzzle fall onto my paws as I laid down next to him.
Bella won't go back to him, Sam assured me. Besides, who knows if he'll be coming with them?
With my luck, he'll be the only one to show up, I grumbled.
We won't plan on that. For now, we need to discuss our options with the council.
I'll keep an eye out here, I replied.
Oh, no you won't, Sam disagreed. You're coming with me.
I growled, lifting my head to glare at him. I'm not going to leave her here unprotected.
Embry can keep an eye out. But we shouldn't be caught lurking here. The treaty is still intact.
So? Are we not allowed to leave the rez?
No, but we might not be able to control ourselves. If you had crossed that one's path without Bella, would you have known she was a Cullen?
Not immediately, I conceded.
And you'd attack, just like any other bloodsucker you saw, right?
Of course.
We can't kill them here, Jake. Not according to the treaty. We can only take them out if they threaten our land. The Cullens haven't stepped foot here. You could have started a war.
I wouldn't have, I argued, but I knew I was wrong.
Besides, you're the one who found out they were coming back. You're also the rightful Alpha, Sam added, glancing over at me warily. Like it or not, there are powers you have which I don't.
I scoffed. Like what?
Do you remember what happened when you thought I would let Bella be a distraction during a fight?
What do you mean?
You nearly overthrew me, Jacob.
I hesitated.
I didn't mean to do that.
And before that, when I forbid you from telling Bella – he continued as if he didn't hear me – and you snuck in through her window anyway. You have power in this pack, too, and it's time you took some responsibility.
Responsibility, I mocked, rolling my eyes. I didn't sign up for this, you know.
Neither did I.
Fine, I grumbled. I'll go. Embry?
'Sup, Jake?
Keep watch at Charlie's house, will you? You have permission to kill the leech if she does anything out of line.
No, you don't have permission to do that, Sam amended. Make sure Bella stays safe, is all.
Killing the leech would keep her safe, I argued.
Then we'd have a whole other problem on our hands, Sam replied, rolling his eyes.
Embry took my position on the edge of the forest. The leech and Bella kept talking, and their words buzzed on the edge of Embry's ears, but he wasn't listening. They had started to mention too many names and places he didn't understand for him to follow it very closely. Sam and I ran to the woods behind Old Quil's corner store, where we used a payphone to call Sue and Billy.
The council convened at Old Quil's battered kitchen table. It was an antique, carved from a cedar tree cut down by his great-great grandfather. The legs had intricately carved totems, featuring ravens with long beaks and human hands, a bear with its mouth wide open and snarling, an eagle with sharp talons, and various kinds of fish. I remembered being little and tracing the delicate lines with my finger, marveling at the detail.
Billy sat at the end, forming the natural head of the circle. With the recent reminder of the birthright I didn't want, I paid more attention to how seamlessly he commanded the attention of the entire council. His chin – though wrinkled skin dangled underneath it – was held high. His eyes were black as night and sharp as arrowheads. Even his hands, which shook as he brought a cup of coffee up to his mouth, seemed strong and resilient.
I wondered if Sam was right. Was my father endowed with a certain magic that put him in charge? Did I have the same power as my father? How could I? I was only sixteen. I wasn't an elder, or all that smart, really. How could I be expected to be a responsible leader when I hadn't even graduated high school?
"What's this about, Sam?" Billy rumbled, settling his ancient eyes across the table.
Beside him sat Sue, stoic as usual. Her eyes had not fully regained the spark they'd had before Harry died, but she was slowly starting to come back to life. The corner of her mouth twitched at Billy's voice, and she turned her head to stare at us impassively.
"My question exactly," Old Quil grumbled.
The eldest of the elders was not thrilled to have us all gathered in his tiny apartment. His white eyebrows, crinkled with age, sloped heavy over his clouded eyes. The wrinkled skin on his face hung from his high cheekbones and slapped against his wispy hair. He wore a hat at all times to hide his not-so-secret bald spot, and today it was a Seattle Seahawks sports cap, the edges worn and frayed.
"We have an important development," Sam announced, then looked over at me.
I cleared my throat, abruptly nervous. This was the first council meeting I had ever attended, and though I'd known these people my whole life, they suddenly felt like strangers. My hands got slick with sweat, so I wiped them on my legs, then pulled a rubber band from my pocket and twisted the hair up off my neck.
"One of the Cullens came back to check on Bella," I said, leaning forward and resting my elbows on the table. "The one who gets visions of the future. She saw that Bella had decided to surrender herself to the red-headed leech." My fists balled up against the scratched table-top. "Bella told her about the leech infestation in the mountains, and now the rest are coming back. They want to kill the red-headed bloodsucker."
The air stood heavy with the silence that followed. I couldn't look up from the table. I focused on a burn mark, where someone must have put out a cigar a long time ago. It rose up from the wood like a miniature volcano.
Billy was the first to speak. "So, the Cullens are returning?"
"Apparently," I replied, looking up to meet his eyes. They were solemn, though not without a glint of hope.
"And you think they will try to attack the red-head?" Billy continued.
"Yes." I nodded, swallowing hard. "I heard the leech promise Bella they would."
"Do they know about the army?" Old Quil inquired, his thin tenor voice rising higher than normal.
"I think so, but there's no way their coven could take on so many vampires at once," Sam stated.
"We'll need to talk about it with them," I argued. "Bella seems to think they could help. Maybe we should let them, since we're outnumbered, too."
"You want us to ally ourselves with the enemy?" Old Quil bristled. "No way! Not in a million years!"
"I don't like it either," I growled back. "But they're not technically the enemy. The treaty still stands."
"Billy," Old Quil sighed, running a hand over his face in exasperation. "Speak to your son."
Everyone looked to Billy, who sat with his eyes appraising me, his face carefully composed and neutral. I wondered if he was deciding whether to grab me by the ear or take off one of his shoes and bat me over the head with it like he used to when I was young.
Instead, his lips cracked open the slightest bit, and he said, "Go on."
I looked back at him with my jaw practically touching the floor for two whole seconds before I regained the ability to speak.
"Look, we can't take on the red-head and her army all by ourselves. They're not stupid, they'll figure out who killed those three leeches and attack first. We can't take on that many, not even if every teenager in La Push shifts." I shuddered at the thought. "So I say we re-negotiate the treaty – just to add a provision that if someone moves against us, they have to help us defend the land, or something. You guys can work out the specifics." I sat back, crossing my arms against my chest.
"If you think for one second that they won't try to get something else in the deal –" Old Quil began.
"Who cares?" I interrupted. "If we go up against the red-head alone, we all die. If we fight with the Cullens, we might live. That's how I see it." I shrugged.
"What does Bella think?" Sue asked quietly, her soft brown eyes curious.
I looked down at the table. "She doesn't want anyone else to die. She thinks it's her fault that all of her friends in Forks disappeared." I looked up to meet Sue's eyes. "She wants it to end. We all do."
"I agree with Jake," Sam announced, resting one of his hands on the table. "I say we put it to a vote. I vote yes."
"I vote no!" Old Quil shrieked, the veins in his neck pulsing. "We shouldn't have anything to do with the cold ones, Cullen or otherwise."
"How would making them an ally hurt us?" I argued. "If they do something that violates the treaty, it's void. But they haven't. If they can help us take down the other leeches, I don't see why we shouldn't let them."
"Since when do you trust them? Did Bella talk you into this?" Old Quil asked, though it sounded more like an accusation.
My jaw clenched together with an audible grinding noise. "No," I replied through my teeth. "She didn't have time to say much of anything. I barely kept my cool long enough to make it outside."
"How do you know she's telling the truth, then? What if it's a trick?"
I laughed, still on edge. "You should know more about your employees, Ateara," I barked. "She can't lie to save her life."
"She lied to Charlie about the Cullens," Sue murmured, staring vacantly out the window.
"That's different," I said quickly. "Charlie probably knew she was hiding something and didn't want to press her for details. But that's neither here nor there, what matters is the Cullens are coming back, and either we accept their help or risk having more enemies. I say we swallow our pride and let them kill the red-head's army."
"We risk less if they help," Sam offered. "It'll be easy to take down the bloodsuckers if we work together."
"I say yes," Sue chimed in, turning back to stare full-on at me. "If it means my children will be safer, I say do whatever it takes."
I nodded, then looked over to Billy. His vote would be the one that mattered most.
He leaned back in his chair, taking another long sip of coffee. Finally, he put the mug down and spoke.
"I vote yes," he said simply.
There was no pomp and circumstance, as Billy usually wasn't one to throw confetti, but I could tell he liked the idea of letting the Cullens deal with the other vampires much more than he liked sending his son on a suicide mission.
I didn't pay much attention to the rest of the meeting. It ended quickly after that; Sue took Billy home while Old Quil grumbled something about respecting the advice of elders. Sam shifted to update the rest of the pack. I went home and got the Rabbit and pulled on a black t-shirt, then high-tailed it over to Forks.
I went to Bella's house as a human, hands shaking on the steering wheel. I let the car idle in Charlie's driveway, debating whether or not I should go in. My eyelids were heavy, and my body felt slow. When was the last time I slept? I couldn't remember. My thoughts swirled around in a fog of exhaustion, clouding my mind.
What did it mean that she had let one of the Cullens back into her house? Did she forgive them? After everything she'd been through – after being one of the living dead for months – was she going to let them in her life again?
And what about me? Sure, I had just argued that we should be working with the leeches who started the whole werewolf shifting business, but that was only because we had no other choice. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't have considered being within fifty feet of them. I hadn't been hiding my feelings with her, either. Did Bella not care that the Cullens had taken my entire life away? Stripped me of normal human experiences and turned me into the stuff of nightmares? Maybe it was easy for her to forgive and forget, but I was still sore about it.
I debated with myself until she stepped out. Her long hair swished behind her as she opened the door, a smile breaking on her face when she saw me – and suddenly none of it mattered. I remembered why I would always come back, no matter how many cliffs she jumped off of or how many leeches she invited inside.
It was always good to see Bella.
I ran to her, and she met me halfway – when we collided, I wrapped my arms around her without thinking, picking up her weightless body and spinning once before dropping her back to the ground. I pulled away, scrunching up my nose.
"You smell like a leech, Bells."
"You're not exactly fresh as a rose, either," she joked.
My eyes darted to the front door. Bella had left it hanging open behind her.
"Is the bloodsucker still in there?"
"Her name is Alice," Bella answered reprovingly, "and no, she went hunting before the others arrive."
"Oh," I sighed, letting go of a breath I didn't know I was holding. "When are they coming?"
"She says they'll all be here by the end of the day," she murmured.
I nodded, then pulled her back into my arms. "I missed you," I breathed, letting my breath saturate her hair, erasing the leech smell.
Bella laughed, hugging me back. "You were only gone for an hour," she replied.
"All the same," I sighed.
"I missed you, too," she whispered, pulling away and resting her palm on my cheek.
"C'mon, let's get out of here," I urged, pulling her over to the Rabbit.
The car ride to La Push was quiet. Neither of us wanted to break the peaceful silence that blanketed the car; if we spoke, we'd have to talk about hard things, and for now I just wanted to focus on the steady rhythm of our breathing, and the fluttering of her heart.
But there were things that needed to be said. When I pulled up to my driveway and parked the car, I stared out the windshield at the faded red house, trying not to think.
Bella rested one of her hands on the nape of my neck and the other one on my cheek, turning my face so I had to look at her. Her eyes were wide and worried, concern evident in the slant of her mouth. I wasn't sure what she saw in my face. Exhaustion, probably. I'd been awake more than twenty-four hours at this point.
"Are you okay?" She asked, brushing her thumb against my cheekbone.
I snorted. "I was about to ask you the same thing."
"I'm fine, Jake. Don't worry about me," she said quickly. "I want to know what you're thinking."
"I'm thinking…" I trailed off, trying to understand the thoughts bouncing around my head. Each one sounded like a rubber ball banging against a wall.
"I'm thinking everything is about to get more complicated." I finally sighed, hanging my head in my hands. "I feel like I've failed, because we can't get rid of these bloodsuckers on our own, and I can't protect you like I promised." My voice broke on the last word.
Before I knew it, my shoulders were shaking with muffled sobs. Bella stroked my hair and cradled my head on her chest, letting me cry into her shoulder. The last time I'd let someone comfort me like this was when my mom died. Rachel and Rebecca had let me curl up on their laps after the funeral and wail with them. It felt like if I could ride one of the briny gusts of wind out to sea my tears would overflow the whole ocean.
"Oh, Jake," Bella sobbed with me. "It's okay! We'll figure something out, I promise."
I sniffed. "That's not what I mean," I croaked. "We heard what Alice said about killing the red-headed leech, and we think we'll have to fight with the Cullens. I know it'll be easier if we work together, and Sam agrees. We took it to the council, and they voted. We want to re-negotiate the treaty, just to make them obligated to fight with us."
Bella pulled my face back to look at her. "I don't understand – the council agreed with you, isn't that a good thing?"
I wrapped my arms around her, trying to squeeze tight enough we'd never have to let go.
"Jake!" She gasped. "Can't – breathe!"
My arms loosened, but I kept my hands on her. My palm rested over the trunk of hair on her back, the other one cupping her face.
"I can't protect you from this," I repeated, closing my eyes. "I never wanted it to come to this – having to hurt you to keep you safe." I paused, taking in a ragged breath. "If there was a way we could do this without involving the Cullens, I'd do it in a heartbeat."
Bella leaned forward to rest her lips on mine. This kiss was unlike the others; she was gentle, soft, forgiving – her mouth was yielding, supple skin pressed up against mine. When she pulled away, a tear fell off her eyelashes onto my lap.
"I don't care what happens to me," she whispered. "All I care about is you. If it means I have to beg the Cullens to help, I'll do it. If it means I give myself up to Victoria – "
I groaned, cutting her off. "Please, please, if you value my sanity, don't say things like that." I cupped her face between my hands, trying to impress on her how serious I was about this. "Do you even know how much I love you?"
She blinked, staring back at me blankly. "What do you mean?"
"Do you remember what I said to you in the garage – about imprints?"
"I think so," she said dubiously, eyes scanning my face. "Like soulmates, right?"
"It's more than that," I insisted. "I've told you this before – if you die, I die. This isn't the sort of thing that ends when one of us dies." I ran my fingers down the side of her face, tracing the faint spattering of freckles on her cheek.
"All I ask is that you try to understand how important you are to me," I continued. "Even if you can't feel the same way. Even if you still love that idiot bloodsucker."
Bella's eyes became hard. She grabbed my hands and pressed them up against the pulse in her chest, a fierce determination in the set of her jaw.
"You feel that?" She asked, raising an eyebrow. She waited until I nodded to continue. "That's my heart. It's beating for you. Not anyone else. The fact that you would even think I still loved Edward is ridiculous. I'm yours – completely," she vowed.
It was hard to doubt her when she was staring me down so intensely, like she was trying to brand her thoughts into my head. Her cheeks burned red, and her heart started beating faster – almost as if her body was trying to emphasize her point.
"That's what I'm trying to explain. It's like that for me, too," I whispered. "If you really had gone and handed yourself over to the leeches, it would kill me. I would never recover. Like Taha Aki and the third wife."
Her nose scrunched up. "I still can't believe you don't remember her name."
I snorted, shaking my head. "I wonder about that, too."
"C'mon," she insisted, squeezing my hand and grabbing the door handle. "You need some sleep, Jake."
I didn't argue. There was no point; my lashes drooped with my heavy eyelids, fighting against the pull of sleep. I didn't stumble – I hadn't tripped over my own two feet since I phased – but I came close to missing a step on the way inside.
Billy didn't seem surprised to see us together. "Hey, kids," he called from the living room.
"Hey, Billy," Bella replied.
"What's up?" I mumbled, throwing my arm around Bella and resting my cheek on her hair. My eyes closed of their own accord.
"You look like you could use a nap," Billy chuckled.
"Hmm," I hummed, feeling the lull of sleep starting to drag me under.
"Jake, Jake," Bella tried to rouse me. "I can't carry you, you're too heavy," she insisted, inching us towards the hallway. "Let's lay down, okay?"
I nodded, not opening my eyes, letting her guide me to my room. When my knees touched the side of the bed, I wrapped my arms around Bella's waist and fell back onto the mattress.
She shrieked in surprise, then huffed. "Give a girl some warning," she grumbled.
A burst of air blew through my nose in an exhausted form of a laugh. My arms tightened around her as I let my head rest in the crook of her shoulder. I didn't think Billy would mind if Bella slept here with me; he could hear every squeak of the bed springs through the paper-thin walls, anyway.
"Jake?" She murmured.
I wasn't sure if I was dreaming; it felt like I was floating somewhere in between waking and sleeping, a sort of limbo. I hummed in response, I think, though I wasn't fully in control of the sound. It might have been more of a groan.
"I love you," she whispered. I felt something soft touch my nose – her lips?
I didn't dream; sleep crashed over me in a wave, pulling me out into darkness faster than a riptide. The next thing I knew, my eyes flew open, and Bella was nowhere to be found.
I jolted up in bed, looking out the crack in the door to see her sitting at the kitchen table with Billy, an amused smile on her face when she caught sight of me. She giggled, then ran her fingers through her hair. I quickly tried to comb through the tangled mess on my head before giving up and throwing it back in an elastic band.
"You finally awake, sleeping beauty?" Billy called.
"I think so," I grumbled, letting my feet fall heavily against the floorboards as I walked into the kitchen.
I opened the fridge and started chugging orange juice straight from the carton. I didn't notice Bella had stood up until she placed a hand over the carton and lowered it from my mouth, pushing a cup into my other hand with a pointed look.
I grinned sheepishly and poured the rest of the juice into the glass.
Bella smiled. "Much better." She nodded.
She was gracious enough to fry some eggs on the stove while I went over specifics with Billy.
"What time will they be here?" He asked.
"The end of the day," Bella answered for me.
"And you'll meet with them then?"
"I guess we ought to set something up first, right?" I asked, looking over at Bella.
She nodded. "We can head over there before Charlie gets home. Alice should be back soon," she said, dropping a plate of eggs in front of me.
"Alice?" Billy asked, eyebrows furrowing.
"They have names," I told him through a mouthful of food.
"She's the one who gets visions," Bella explained. "But she can't see the wolves, for some reason."
My mouth hung open for a moment. "Really?"
"Yeah," she replied, as if the answer was obvious. "She only saw me stumbling around the woods looking for Victoria, then it cut out. She thinks it's because that's when you showed up." She poked me in the side.
I nodded, returning to my plate. I didn't want to think about what the leech might have seen if I hadn't shown up.
"Her mate is Jasper," Bella continued matter-of-factly. "She says he has experience with this sort of thing. He should be here before the rest of them, she thinks. He's not as… practiced, I guess, with not eating humans. I got a papercut around him once, and he…" She trailed off, glancing at my fork, which had started shaking. I stuffed it in my mouth, glaring down at my plate.
"He can affect your emotions – make an angry crowd calm, and stuff. He'd probably come in handy with Paul," she joked.
"What about the others?" Billy asked, leaning forward.
I opened my mouth to tell him to butt the hell out and leave Bella alone, but she didn't even flinch. I had expected her to grasp at her sides and start panting again, like she was being torn apart; instead, she answered him in a level voice, face smooth.
"Carlisle is sort of the leader. His wife, Esme, is really sweet. She was like a second mom to me," she sighed wistfully, then continued. "They don't have any special talents. Emmett is really big and strong, and Rosalie is… well, she never liked me very much, so I don't know much about her. The only other talented one is Edward. He reads minds." She stared down at the table, tracing patterns in the faded wood.
"Wasn't that weird?" Billy wondered. "Never having a thought to yourself?"
"He couldn't read my mind," she mumbled. "Some sort of glitch in my brain, I guess."
I covered her hand in mine and squeezed. She smiled up at me, one of her more appetizing grins – and I couldn't help myself. I leaned over, still chewing, and pecked her cheek.
She giggled and pushed me away, but kept my hand in hers.
Billy leaned forward and eyed me solemnly. "Negotiate a meeting in no-mans-land. You can use the spot where Harry taught you how to shoot."
I remembered the spot for a different reason, though it was true Harry had taken me out there once to show me the basics of a shotgun. It was also the place I'd taken Bella to ride the bikes, back when I had just gotten them to run. It felt like a lifetime ago; a memory that didn't belong in this world of monsters.
We left soon after I had inhaled my breakfast. I drove us back to her house in the Rabbit, holding her hand on the center console.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure," she replied.
"How come you weren't crossing your arms before?" I wondered aloud. "I thought talking about the Cullens hurt you."
Bella was quiet for a moment. She stared out the windshield as the highway disappeared beneath us and turned into the deserted residential street. When she finally spoke, her voice was soft and low.
"This is the only thing I can do to help," she whispered. "I'll be damned if I'm not going to do it to the best of my ability."
I squeezed her hand. "We're going to end this, Bella. I promise."
She nodded, then smiled. "We can make something special for when Charlie comes home tonight – he's had a tough week, I think."
I snorted. "He's had a tough year, to say the least."
When we got to Charlie's, my nose scrunched up. The leeches were here.
The little one – Alice – met us at the door with her arms crossed, glaring at Bella reprovingly.
"Where have you been?" She demanded. "We've been worried sick – I was just about to send Jasper out to find you."
"Jake needed –" Bella began.
I cut her off. "What's it to you?" I snarled. "She's not your prisoner."
"How was I supposed to know she didn't get taken by Victoria?"
I rolled my eyes. "Give us some credit. She's safer in La Push than she is in a house full of bloodsuckers."
That's when I noticed the murderous glare of the vampire standing behind Alice. He was tall, only a couple inches shorter than I was. He had light, wavy hair and oddly textured skin, unlike any other bloodsucker I'd ever seen. It was subtle enough that I couldn't be sure what the pattern was, but the hair on the back of my neck stood up at the sight.
This leech was more dangerous than the others, that much was obvious.
"This must be the dog," he said, scowling. "Alice mentioned you."
I glared back. "This must be the one who took a snap at you, Bella."
The leech pulled back his lips to bare his teeth at me. A growl vibrated in my chest, and my hands shook uncomfortably.
"Jasper," said another one, resting a hand on the tall leech's shoulder. "Be gracious."
This one was shorter, and blonde; his face was calm, though stern. I was surprised when I didn't hate him immediately.
"Come on, Jake." Bella ushered us inside.
I didn't take my eyes off Jasper, watching his every move. The three of them stood in a loose circle around Charlie's kitchen table, all identically pale and smelling like a fountain of bleach. I refused to step any farther into the house, planting my feet in front of the door. I pulled Bella closely into my side, angling myself to defend her if one of them attacked. My hands shook so hard they blurred. I tightened my fists, trying not to growl.
"We haven't been introduced. My name is Carlisle," said the blonde one.
"Jacob," I replied, eyes darting between him and the tall one.
"Jacob Black?" He asked, though he already knew the answer. He continued without waiting for confirmation. "I met your great-grandfather once, Ephraim Black. You remind me of him."
Bella rested a hand on my shoulder, and I felt my frame start to relax. It wouldn't be wise to shift in Charlie's kitchen, especially with her so close. I concentrated on breathing through my mouth before replying.
"Really?" I asked through clenched teeth, glaring across the room.
"Indeed," Carlisle replied politely. "He was just as concerned about protecting his people. It's very noble, what you've been doing. I commend you for it." His eyes were wide and sincere. I couldn't detect a trace of deceit in his unmoving, marble face; but I didn't trust his unnaturally symmetrical features.
"We do what we have to," I replied diplomatically. "Do you know why I'm here?"
"To protect Bella, I assumed."
"Yes," I said through my teeth. "But I have a message from the council. Sam – the head of the pack – wants to set up a meeting to go over this new threat."
Carlisle nodded. "Yes. As Victoria threatens all of us, it would be wise."
"We only wanted to go over a few of the finer points – can I be frank?" I asked, glancing down at Bella for reassurance. She nodded, urging me to go on. "We're outnumbered here. The red-headed leech has created more vampires than we can handle on our own."
Carlisle's forehead creased in thought. "The rest of our family is on their way, they should be here soon. Their numbers will help us. From what I've heard, Victoria has built a newborn army – something my son, Jasper, knows more about than I do. He can explain the situation, I think, if you would like to go over options."
I nodded. "We only ask for one meeting. No promises after that."
"Where?" Carlisle asked.
"No-man's-land. Come at the highway from the north and follow our scent." I explained. "We should agree to some conditions, though."
"What conditions?" The tall one sneered.
My eyes narrowed into slits. "Some provisions to make sure there's no fighting."
"That's a good idea," Carlisle chimed in. "What did you have in mind?"
I smirked. "No biting." I didn't miss when Bella rolled her eyes next to me. "And no ambush attacks. Other than that, we can't guarantee your safety."
Carlisle nodded solemnly. "Of course. We do not want any conflict with the pack." He cocked his head to the side, looking around me. "Will you be there, Bella?"
"Absolutely not," I growled.
"Of course I will," Bella insisted, glaring up at me. "I have a right to know what's going on."
I pinched the bridge of my nose, closing my eyes against the headache settling in.
"We can talk about it later," I argued, grabbing her by the arm and pulling us back to the door. "We'll meet at six o'clock."
"Bye, Bella!" Alice sang, dancing behind as I stalked through the threshold.
"Bye," Bella muttered, her mouth set in a determined line.
I should have known what was waiting for me in the car on the way to La Push. Over the months, the spark in Bella's eyes had slowly returned, but it was never as bright as when she was angry. I could see the hot, indignant tears welling up on the lashes framing her eyes, and I could tell I was in for it.
"You have no right to keep me away from the meeting," she insisted immediately.
I hadn't even started the car yet. I sighed, leaning forward and twisting the keys in the engine too quickly. It stuttered and groaned, and I had to try three more times before the engine caught, but Bella continued.
"I will be there, Jake. You can't stop me. If you won't bring me, then I'll ask Alice. She'd be happy to help."
"Oh, I see," I spat at the windshield. "As soon as I do something you don't like, you go running back to the leeches. Well, I'm glad someone else is willing to risk your life, since you love that." My voice was dripping with venom.
"You know that's not true!" She cried, turning to face me.
I kept my eyes fixed on the road, hands shaking on the steering wheel. "Do I?"
"You should, if you have any brains!"
"Oh, so now I'm stupid for wanting to keep you safe?"
"That's not the point! I have a right to know what's going on, Jake!"
"You think I'm lying?!" I roared, clenching my fists until the knuckles turned white. "You think I'm hiding something from you? Just go and ask the guys – I tell you everything! Even things they don't want me to say! You ask, and you push, and you force me to give you these secrets – like Emily and Leah. I should have never told you anything."
"You shouldn't have!" She screamed, balling up her hands and slamming them on the seat next to her. "In fact, you should have just let Laurent kill me and save everyone all the trouble!"
"That's not what I meant," I argued.
"But you regret it, don't you? Saving me? I'm fine Jake, you don't have to worry about me. If I'm that much of a burden, you might as well just drop me off here and never come back to Forks."
"You don't mean that," I scoffed. "You wouldn't last a day without me."
She was silent for a moment. "I lived without you before, you know –" she began quietly.
"When the Cullens were here?" I interrupted. "And now they're back you don't need me anymore?"
"That's not what I was going to say!" She screeched, her voice thick with tears.
"But it's true, right? I was just a convenient explanation!" I barked, glancing over at her before fixing my eyes back on the windshield, vision red with fury. "Just someone who could tell you the truth about the Cullens, and when you were done with me, you didn't care if you ever saw me again!"
"That's not true!" She sobbed. "I mean, yes, at first I didn't see you that way, but –"
"But then they left, and I was the only one willing to put up with you," I growled.
"No!" She exclaimed, but I was still going.
"You love those reeking bloodsuckers so much, after everything they did to you, after everything they did to me. If you love me so much, how come you're so nice to them? Huh? You know what they are to me – you knew what you were doing when you let them in your house! God, Bella, can't you see how pathetic it is?"
Something about what I said opened the floodgates, and a loud sob broke out of Bella's chest. Part of me felt bad, but most of me was overwhelmed with anger. I wasn't sure how we had gotten so heated, but now that we were in the thick of it, I could feel the waves of heat rolling off me and shaking my body.
"I know," she said, her voice breaking. "I'm pathetic, and weak, and human! I know. But I can't do nothing. I won't let myself be a burden on you or the pack, and right now I am! Can't you see that? None of this would be happening if Victoria didn't want to kill me! I won't sit at home and twiddle my thumbs while you go and fight!"
"Is that really what this is about?" I hissed. "Or is it about seeing Edward again?"
She flinched at my harsh words. I was hitting below the belt, and I knew it, but I was so angry I couldn't contain the words, even though I regretted them as soon as they were out.
"I'm not going for him," Bella said weakly. "I'm going for you. Someone has to be civil to them, if we want them to help kill Victoria."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Do you hear yourself when you talk?" She asked rhetorically. "All this crap about 'bloodsuckers,' and 'leeches,' – it's so rude!"
"Oh, well I'll be more careful next time not to offend the parasites," I replied sarcastically.
"I'm going to the meeting," Bella insisted.
"No, you're not."
"Yes, I am."
"This isn't up for discussion!" I slammed my palm against the steering wheel, rattling the whole car.
We had pulled up in front of Emily's house. Bella, face red and fuming, hopped out of the car and slammed it behind her. She stomped over the wet lawn, feet squishing in the damp grass, and banged the house door, too. I slammed my fist into the steering wheel, punching the horn over and over again until Sam came out, towing Paul and Bella with him.
Paul was smirking, and Sam was giving me a reproving look. Bella refused to make eye contact, getting in the backseat next to Paul.
"Trouble in paradise?" Paul asked, leaning forward to flick my ear.
"Shut up," I growled.
"Jacob," Sam began, his tone warning. "Calm down."
I was still shaking, my teeth chattering. I didn't reply.
I reversed onto the road, swinging the car haphazardly and nearly taking out a mailbox. We sped down the wet roads, the air in the car tense and stiff, until we made it to the clearing and I slammed on the brakes. We came to an abrupt halt on the edge, and I didn't bother to take the keys out of the ignition before getting out and running into the forest. My entire body was convulsing, begging me to shift.
The rest of the pack was already there, waiting in the thick trees bordering the muddy road. Sam was the only one who stayed human, waiting next to the car with Bella. She leaned against the hood of the Rabbit, arms crossed around her chest, lower lip jutting out in a pout.
You need to apologize, Leah chastised me.
Buy her another box of conversation hearts, Quil joked.
Shut up, I replied weakly, my heart heavy in my chest.
I shrugged out of the trees, slowly treading over to Bella with my head hanging low. I stopped next to her, then nudged her shoulder with my muzzle.
"What?" She hissed.
I whined, nuzzling my head against her neck, hoping she understood the gesture of reconciliation.
"Oh, Jake," she sighed, wrapping one of her arms around my neck and knotting her fingers in the fur there. "What am I going to do with you?"
Whatever you want, I thought to her silently. I'm yours.
