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So, if you struggle with remembering where places are in the world, I recommend going to Seterra to brush up on your skills.
Too Mainstream
A sleek, white Subaru slid neatly into a parking space outside the racetrack.
There was a brief flurry of car door opening and shutting before a very diverse trio hurried towards the entrance to the stands. The leader of the trio saw America standing at the entrance, surrounded by various nations, and led his two associates onwards.
"Dad!" he called out. "Hey, Dad, we didn't miss it did we?!"
America turned and saw yet another of his wayward teens. He was of fairly average height, with a sharp jawline and an enigmatic expression. His dark blue eyes unreadable behind a pair of rectangular-framed glasses. His complexion was a soft shade of brown and he had messy black hair which stuck up in a few places. He was dressed in skinny jeans, checkered converse shoes, and an oversized t-shirt with and even more oversized flannel jacket. He also had a few piercings in his ears.
"Oregon," America said. "Sorry, kiddo, the race is just letting out."
Oregon grimaced and snapped his fingers.
Beside him, his two friends were catching their breaths. There was one boy and one girl. The boy was distinctly East Asian, with short, windswept brown hair and light, amber eyes that glinted behind his glasses; he also had tulips in his pockets, which was a little odd. The girl was more Middle Eastern in appearance with her dark hair tied in a thick braid, and pretty, dark brown eyes; she also had a thin scar down one cheek and was dressed in military fatigues, around her neck was a gold pendant shaped like the sun beneath a loose, white-and-black scarf.
"Ore-kun, please do not run so fast," said the boy breathlessly.
"Toyama-san?" Japan said in disbelief from beside America. "What are you doing here?"
"Japan-sama," the prefecture stuttered, a nervous blush on his cheeks. "I-I am old friends with Ore-kun…I-I mean 'Oregon-san.'"
"Well, 'friends' is an interesting way of putting it," Oregon said, one eyebrow arching.
Toyama's blush deepened. America looked at Oregon blankly, not fully comprehending what his son was implying – just like the time he didn't understand that when Nevada said she had a "five card stud" the last time she saw her boyfriend, she wasn't talking about a poker game for once.
"Either way, it is nice to finally meet you, Mr. Japan," Oregon continued. "I'm Lewis C. Jones, the state of Oregon."
"Tch, yeah, yeah, great," the female member of the trio scoffed, interrupting the pleasantries. "Oregon, if we've already missed the race, can we get out of here? I don't want to risk running into-"
"You!" an angry voice broke through the crowd and a fuming Turkey stormed up to the girl. "Kurdistan, what the fuck do you think you're doing here?!"
"Wow, didn't even have to mention the fucker's name and he still magically appears to ruin my day," the now-identified Kurdistan said. "Hello to you, too, Turkey. Since you asked so nicely, I will tell you that I am spending time with two boys who are not members of my family and have been alone on the road with them and even sleeping in the same motel room as them for about a week."
Turkey's face turned an interesting shade of purple as Kurdistan kept adding layers of indecency to her statement. Turkey liked to consider himself the 'older brother' to his neighbors and former territories, something which had always irked Kurdistan as she knew they both originated with very different cultures (heck, Turkey's culture wasn't even indigenous to the region like Kurdistan's, which was another reason why Kurdistan resented her so-called 'brother' – you know, besides the oppression and genocides).
"Oh, and, for the record," she added with a smirk. "They have both seen all my tattoos."
Turkey made a kind of strangled gurgling sound. America continued to look oblivious while Japan was staring at Toyama in silent suspicion. Toyama was shaking under the scrutiny of his boss – if Japan was this surprised by Toyama being close to Oregon, then how would he react to finding out which American state Ehime, Fukuoka, Hokkaido, Okinawa, and Hiroshima were friends with?
"You know, you really shouldn't provoke him so much, Hêvîdar," Oregon said, taking a sip of coffee as the trio sat in a booth at a local diner.
"I know, but it's so entertaining to watch," Kurdistan replied. "And Turkey can suck it if he thinks he can tell me what to do now. So can Syria…and Iraq…and Iran. Honestly, it's days like this that make me seriously consider taking Israel up on that alliance offer."
"Trading us in for an older model," Oregon said wryly.
"I am older than Israel," Toyama said indignantly. "Kurdi-tan is, too."
Kurdistan threw a curious look at Toyama Prefecture. He often omitted the 's' when saying her name and she knew it was because he was turning the 'stan' part into a Japanese honorific like 'kun' or 'san.' However, whenever she asked him what kind of an honorific it was, he started stammering and blushing, while Oregon fought not to laugh.
"Nǐ hǎo!" a cheery voice greeted them and they all turned to see Taiwan, who was followed close behind by Iowa, Kosovo, Yamanashi Prefecture, and Yucatán.
"Heya, Lewis," said Iowa. "You missed a really great race. Nothing like watching vehicles run really fast to get the blood pumping."
"Meh, I prefer bikes to cars," Oregon said with a shrug before taking another reluctant sip of coffee. "Ugh, what brand of coffee is this, anyway? Lean Joe Bean? This stuff tastes like bathroom cleaner," he muttered. "I was surprised that Aguascalientes wasn't anywhere to be found. She's normally all over racing contests."
"Manuela got into a bit of trouble with Mamá," said Yucatán sheepishly. "She had a little bit too much wine at the San Marcos Fair and sort of rode her motorbike through the bullring and…well, it wasn't pretty. She did throw a bit of a tantrum when Mamá said she wasn't allowed to join the race as part of her punishment; Manuela so wanted to beat Indiana and Alabama."
"So, you guys got any plans now that the race is over?" said Taiwan.
"Ore-kun suggested a backpacking trip," said Toyama. "I must admit that I am eager to get some fresh air after being stuck in a car for such a long time."
"That sounds like fun," Kosovo piped up. "Maybe we could all team up and go on the trip together."
Kurdistan glared at Kosovo and muttered irately into her coffee cup. Kosovo didn't notice; or, if she did, she didn't say anything. The other nations and administrative districts tried to pretend they didn't notice either. They had all realized Kosovo and Kurdistan had a very awkward relationship – mostly because of Turkey – and they all did their best to work around it.
"If it's no trouble, of course," Taiwan added.
"No trouble, at all, Mei-Mei," said Oregon smoothly, ignoring Kurdistan's pouting at the sudden additions to their trip.
"Hey, maybe we could invite a few other people along, like Hong Kong and New York."
Iowa started laughing.
"C'mon, Mei," she said. "New York breaks out in hives if he has to spend time outside a city. And I doubt you can get Hong Kong to put down his phone or his laptop long enough for him to even hear a suggestion of doing something outdoorsy."
"Hmm, good point," Taiwan conceded.
In all fairness, none of them had thought backpacking at Fort Harrison State Park would have ended with so much collateral damage – or a lifetime ban once Indiana found out.
Honestly, though, even though two members of the group were huge fans of wrestling, none of the others thought they'd act on it while on a simple stroll through nature. Of course, considering how both Kurdistan and Iowa were tough, buff ladies with a shared liking for blood sport, it was probably inevitable.
Iowa and Kurdistan just never really spent that much time together as they hung out in different friend circles. Frankly, Oregon blamed himself for stopping the hike for that picnic by the lake, but, in his defense, he didn't think that Kurdistan and Iowa deciding to dip their feet in the water would lead to them admiring each other's muscles and somehow getting into the topic of wrestling.
When the tone of the conversation changed from shared interest to outright boasting, they all should have seen the trouble brewing. Iowa was understandably proud of her thirty NCAA Division I titles and Kurdistan was similarly proud of her historic wrestling styles which she'd learned from Iran. What had started as a friendly discussion of the sport steadily turned into the kind of tough-guy preening one normally expects from beefy, well-oiled men in shorts rather than two pretty teenage girls on a nature walk.
Within a matter of minutes, Iowa and Kurdistan were knee-deep in mud and grappling like a pair of Greco-Roman athletes before a crowd of braying plebs.
The most embarrassing part of it all was that only Oregon and Kosovo were uncomfortable with the situation. Toyama, Yamanashi, and Yucatán just watched the spectacle with far too much interest and Taiwan was getting way more into the fight than Oregon ever would have expected of the bubbly island nation – especially considering how Taiwan kept goading Iowa and Kurdistan on, peppering her commentary with an astonishing number of swears in various languages.
In the end, Indiana found out what was going on and showed up soon after with America and Officer Shaughnessy in tow to help stop the girls who, by that point, were both covered in muck and had ripped large portions of each other's clothes off. Once the fight had been broken up, Indiana was steaming with anger while America just looked disappointed and Officer Shaughnessy, having cuffed both girls, tutted at them that he expected such tomfoolery from Illinois, New York, California, Nevada, New Jersey, Ohio, Florida, Texas, Pennsylvania, or even Montana, but not a normally well-behaved state like Iowa.
"Maybe we should've just had a nice game of baseball, instead," Oregon thought aloud as he and the others waited in the police station as Iowa and Kurdistan were being cleared and given official reprimands.
"Are you kidding, Ore-kun?" Toyama said incredulously. "If we'd done that, then Taiwan would be the one in the jail cell, instead."
Yamanashi shuddered in agreement as Taiwan smiled innocently.
America, meanwhile, returned to the hotel where the guest nations were staying in order to meet up with the familiar group that he had been telling his history to.
He made his apologies for the delay, glossing over the details of what happened at the state park, and the group made their way to a local restaurant which America had invited them to earlier. America had called to reserve a private room for the party, as he knew there would be some things discussed which the humans shouldn't overhear.
Once drinks were distributed and meal orders sent, the group began to chat about the events of the day. France was gushing about how Monaco had done in the race and what a surprise it had been. Of course, the niceties passed by quickly and soon the nations were beginning to turn towards America with questions shining in their eyes.
"So, America," England said, tactful as ever, "Your children certainly seem to favor you in many respects."
"I guess," said America, trying to hide his nervousness. "But…many of the early nineteenth century kids take after their mother in more ways than even they will admit. Even the northern ones have a bit of Louise in them."
The tension was in the air again. America could sense that his friends wished to hear more, but America wasn't sure if he was ready to address the rest of the story…the war with Mexico, the rising divisions, the Civil War…it just didn't feel like the right time. But, America was willing to give them something of an idea of what it was like.
"Well, to really get the full picture, I'll have to go back to 1812…" he began.
Author's Note: Next chapter will be the second part of Lifetimes of Love.
Toyama Prefecture and Kurdistan are affiliated with Oregon the same way that Kosovo and Taiwan are with Iowa. Also, Taiwan is connected with Oregon, too. Technically it's supposed to be Iraqi Kurdistan that has the link to Oregon, but I'm not in the mood to make four different Kurdistans (hey, the different regions are part of the same theoretical 'nation,' so Kurdistan could probably have just one personification).
Kurdistan is one of those breakaway nations that loves to rile her neighbors up (likely because Turkey, Syria, Iraq, and Iran do not want to give up lands they claim ownership of, especially because of how oil-rich Kurdish lands are). Traditionally, Kurdish women practice tattooing, more so than men, though the practice has lessened in recent decades (I will leave it to your imaginations to figure out where Kurdistan's are).
Kurdistan's human name "Hêvîdar" means something along the lines of "beacon of hope" – again, please correct me if I'm wrong.
I also think that there's a weird relationship between Kurdistan and Kosovo. Kosovo, from what I can tell, is very supportive of Kurdistan's independence because Kosovo has been in that position, too, so I think Kosovo likes Kurdistan. On the flip side, Kurdistan, I think, resents Kosovo for how much international support and recognition Kosovo receives – to say nothing of how Turkey encouraged resettlement of thousands of Albanian Kosovars into Kurdish lands, forcing Kurdish people out of their homes.
Iowa and Kurdistan both like wrestling and Taiwan is a baseball fan.
There is a canon design for Toyama Prefecture. Just look up the Hetalia Japanese Prefectures and he should be in that file on the Hetalia Archives.
'Tan' is used as a Japanese honorific for someone who is considered childlike and cute. Toyama had better hope Kurdistan doesn't find out.
Portland, Oregon has the largest number of openly polyamorous relationships of anywhere in the U.S.A. Adding onto the fact that Portland is also very open-minded about relationships and romance, it made me start thinking of Oregon as a person maybe being bisexual or pansexual.
Also, yes, I know eastern Oregon, like eastern Washington, is more conservative than the west; however, bear in mind that Hetalia largely portrays its characters as stereotypes of the nations they represent. Oregon, again like Washington, carries the hipster liberal stereotype when there are plenty of people who do not fit that image in the state. The fact remains that that is the most vocal group residing there, so that is what people associate with the state.
Five card stud – a poker term which can mean either a game with multiple betting rounds with the same deck played against other opponents or when players are dealt one card face down in the first round and one card face up in each of the next four rounds (either way, I think that can be a pretty effective innuendo if you think about it long enough).
Aguascalientes is a Mexican state known for car and motorbike racing – so I think she'd be friends/rivals with America's racing states.
