"How was your morning?" Emma asked Clay when she called after work.
"Better than last night but still feels like my head is in a cloud." Clay told her as he packed up his sweaty clothes into his bag to bring home to wash. His life pretty much consisted of working out all the time and as nice as it was to have his leg mostly working he still couldn't feel it and was worried that no matter how far he got in PT it would never be good enough to be fully back on the teams.
"Have you heard anything about Bravo today?" Emma asked him, knowing her best chance of getting answers with whether or not her family was okay would be through him...at least he is on base.
"No...people have been running around more than usual but no one has said anything." Clay said shrugging, "Still feel like something isn't right but I don't know."
"You want to do something for dinner tonight?"
"Uh, yeah, I can. Want me to pick up tacos after I am done here?" Clay asked her, thankful that he wouldn't have to go home alone quite yet and knowing that she would be eating alone if he wasn't there...it made him feel at least a tiny bit useful when he otherwise felt useless.
"Yeah. I will be here...going through and getting stuff packed up...saw one of mom's old coworkers pulling out of the driveway when I was turning onto the street. Pretty sure Dad has been talking to them and is going to sell sooner than later."
"When does Mikey get back from camp?"
"Right before Bravo is scheduled to come home...so a few days." Emma said with a sigh, "He told me he didn't want to come home...that it is easier to be happier there than it is at home."
"Ouch." Clay said, knowing that Emma would take a comment like that personal...but also knowing where he was coming from. "You feel the same?"
"Well the house sure isn't the same without my Mom...but it is home...if we don't have it...I dunno...everything is just so different...do I even have a home home anymore?"
"Home is wherever your family is...it doesn't have to be a house...or even a city...it is where you feel loved and safe."
"Look at you getting all sappy." Emma said with a smile.
"Whatever. I will see you in a few hours." Clay said, pocketing his phone with a smile.
"Hey, Ray. How you feeling?" Jason asked as he let himself into the exam room where Ray was being checked out and bandaged up.
"Hey. Uh a few scratches, few bruises, but I'll be ready to go when we reload on Khan." Ray was quick to tell him.
"Not asking about the elbow." Jason said, knowing full well that Ray was likely to throw the same question back at him.
"I know." Ray answered instead, looking down to his shoes...the two of them needing this conversation a long time ago but they were gifted with today and knowing that tomorrow was not guaranteed now was when that conversation was going to happen.
"Give us a minute, will you?" Jason said to the medic that was working on him.
"How am I feeling?" Ray said, feeling tears sting the back of his eyes.
"Yeah. How are you feeling?" Jason said knowing that as a friend he had failed the one man who had been there no questions asked to help him through all of his worst moments.
"Feel like I've never seen a more beautiful sunset than the one I saw tonight. Feel like I've never wanted to see my family more than I want to see them right now. And I feel like I don't deserve my teammates who marched through hell to come save me." There is was, his last sentence, his voice wavering as the tears filled his eyes. Reality was in their line of work they had no guarantees, no one sure to follow through, to save their ass...but today that brotherhood was shown...and Ray knew that it wasn't just his, or their job on the line but the entire team risked their lives to save him.
"Really thought you were gonna die on that mountain." Jason told him, knowing that Ray knew how deep that one sentence ran.
"I did die. Part of me, anyway. I was almost lost for good, brother. Told this woman I was holed up with I'd kill her if she made a sound. I scared her, but I terrified myself. Mostly because I believed I'd do it. Knew I was digging my own grave if I let her go, but, Jace, something happened and I realized she was sent to me. That woman was my salvation." Ray said, knowing he sounded crazy...but also knowing that if anyone was going to understand it was going to be his brother...his best friend.
"She was your salvation? How's that?
"It just hit me. I'd rather die being the man Naima loved than live as the man she found." Ray said simply and Jason nodded, understanding at once what he meant.
"I know Mexico denying that guy's last rites, it..." Jason tried to apologize, knowing at least part of what lead Ray down the path was under his order.
"Hey. That wasn't you, man, that was me."
"I know how hard that was on you, and I should have been there for you, and I wasn't." Jason said, feeling his own guilt over the last year weighing heavy on his shoulders.
"You were when you marched your ass over that damn mountain to come save me. And that's all that matters." Ray said knowing that now that all cards were on the table and there wouldn't be the same separation that had been there since Mexico.
"No brother left behind." Jason said, knowing that with Ray all things had been forgiven, that as long as the two of them were good they could find a way through.
"Amen."
"That's right." Jason said as he pulled Ray into him.
"Now do we need to have that same conversation flipped? I know you haven't been right since Alana died...raising the kids, the team...losing Adam...Clay...what happened with Brett...I haven't pushed as much as I should have."
"Not on you Ray." Jason told him. "Just a lot going on is all...have to find a way to work the problem."
"Don't have to work it alone anymore Brother." Ray smiled at Jason waving the medic back in to finish what he was doing so he could go back to his team.
Clay was shocked to see Ash Spencer's name flash on his phone mere seconds after he hung up with Emma but that was his dad...you never knew what you were going to get...if you got anything at all. So when his father told him to rush over to the station Clay did just that...he had no idea what Ash had done but it was something to boost himself up...but if it meant that Brett would get what he deserved, well he really didn't care.
"That's right. Back in five, four, three I'm pleased to be joined by Ash Spenser, former Navy SEAL and author of the best-selling book The Man behind the Myth. Welcome."
"It's an absolute honor to be here, Patty, speaking about an American hero that your audience most likely has never heard of. Brett Swann."
"Brett is the former Navy SEAL who recently took his own life in the parking lot of a VA campus?"
"That's correct. One among 19 veterans who have committed suicide on VA campuses from 2017 till now." Ash said and Clay cringed, he hated that phrase...committed...implying that Brett did something wrong when he didn't...but that really wasn't the point of what he was there for...Brett's name was now on national television...people would know he died a hero.
"What do you call that?"
"Acts of protest. Wake-up calls."
"Right, I-I guess what I'm asking, Ash, is, did Brett do what he did because he was suffering from traumatic brain injury?"
"Brett committed suicide because he couldn't get treatment for his TBI. And that's a crime. A national disgrace." Ash answered as he glanced over at Clay who had a hard time keeping his jaw off the floor...his dad had just done the impossible...if those words had come out of his mouth his career would be over...but Ash's career as a team guy was over... but just as quickly as he mentioned Brett the attention was turned back onto himself and his book.
"Is this your second book?" Patty asked him.
"That's correct." Ash answered and Clay's mind wandered as the two of them talked about the exaggerated tales his father had told in order to keep his publisher happy.
"There he is, ladies and gentlemen." Jason said as he walked into the barracks with Ray to find the guys sitting around. "Bravo 2 is back in the fold."
"Hey, how you feeling, buddy?" Sonny smiled when Jason and Ray walked back into their barracks.
"I, uh - grateful for all you boys did for me." Ray said as he looked around the room.
"Mm-hmm." Jason smiled.
"Hate I put you in that position." Ray continued.
"Do it again if we have to." Trent said from his seat on the couch.
"Well, no doubt, but, if you do go missing again, can we please do it in a less vertical environment? Because my legs, they, they are killing me right now." Sonny joked, glad to see the smiles on his brothers faces.
"Hurt? Like that? That hurt?" Jason said leaning over where Sonny was propped in the camp chair and squeezing his leg.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on, now." Sonny begged with a smile on his face.
"Thank God for those horses." Brock said as he moved around, half asleep in the recliner.
"Oh, you know, I'm actually pissed off that I missed Sonny in his element." Ray smiled.
"In his element, man?" Jason laughed.
"Yeah." Sonny piped up.
"He's definitely no Clint Eastwood on a horse. More like a koala bear on a mule." Jason teased, standing behind Sonny.
"What the hell you talking about, man? I was doing things on that animal that you city boys can't even comprehend." Sonny tried to interject.
"Sonny can't ride." Trent told Ray as he sat down next to him.
"No, he can't ride?" Ray asked.
"What? I can ride just fine, I just I'm not a fan of those furry, demonic quadrupeds." Sonny said, crossing his arms and shaking his head.
"Oh, a cowboy that hates horses." Ray laughed. "I don't get it, I don't get it."
"A frogman who hates water." Jason teased.
"You two are a hell of a lot more entertaining when you punch each other." Sonny mumbled.
"I mean, look, hey, you could've been Full Metal. He fell off at least, what, twice?" Jason smiled towards Full Metal.
"What? I was demonstrating the classic horse warfare combat dismount. Y'all should've been taking notes." Full Metal laughed.
"All right, here we go." Eric said as he walked into the room.
"So, we cleared hot to go get Khan?" Jason asked.
"Khan's in the wind. Entire compound's been vacated. Look, fellas, Commander Shaw's gonna recommend that Bravo Team be split up when we get back from Virginia Beach. I'm sorry. I wanted you to hear it from me first." Eric told them, looking first to Jason.
"Uh-uh. Guy's got no right." Jason argued before walking out.
Hearing Sonny mumble as he walked out of the room, "I wouldn't trade Shaw's position for all the tri-tip in the world."
He stormed to the room where he saw Shaw standing with a handful of other cake eaters and debated going in there and killing the man with his bare hands before he caught Mandy's eye and he spun on his heels heading straight for the garage bay where he dropped to his knees, silently praying for another miracle...he couldn't lose his family. Not when they had gone through hell and back just to keep them all alive. Feeling eyes on him a few minutes later he knew it was Mandy...no one else would dare to come into the room. "Shaw's out of his mind. I'll do whatever I can. Exhaust my Rolodex. People owe me favors." Mandy told him, knowing what losing Bravo would do to the man in front of her.
"You know what, maybe you should spend some more time watching your own six." Jason said standing up and turning around, "Indian helo appears out of nowhere. You must have pulled some strings for that one."
"Some strings, something like that, yeah." Mandy said, knowing that she was likely to be dumped into some cubicle somewhere and not caring because for once she knows she saved the life of good men.
"That's gonna cost you."
"Jason. A lot of things we do in this job keep me up at night, but risking it to save you guys is not gonna be one of them. Are you gonna be okay?"
"Okay? I just blew up my team."
"You saved Ray's life."
"Yeah, right after I almost ruined my relationship with him. You know, Mandy, I just spent months convincing myself that everything is just fine, that everything's okay, despite everything that's gone on in my life. My wife dying. Adam getting blown up. Brett, Clay. You know, Mandy, maybe it's just me who's falling apart and taking my team with me." He said, finally looking at her, surprised that all of that had actually come out of his mouth voluntarily.
"You're being too hard on yourself." Mandy told him simply, what Jason needed right now was definitely not codling...at least not when he needed to go up against Shaw to save Bravo...she would save that for once they were home...for if Bravo really was split up.
"Am I? Am I?" Jason said, feeling the room spin around him as he struggled to maintain control.
Walking up and standing in Jason's face she calmly told him, "I have never seen anyone adapt so effortlessly on the battlefield. You can do that off the field, too. You just have to decide to."
"I don't know. I don't know how." Jason said, looking to her for help...she was always the one who could get through to him...but instead she turned to walk out. "Where you going?" Jason yelled after her.
"Find Khan. Hung around you long enough to know one thing."
Looking to Mandy in complete awe he asked, "What's that?"
"We're never out of the fight." Mandy answered. If she found Khan, they were the only ones there and Shaw would have to send them after him...if she got him then maybe there was a chance of them staying a team...a chance...Mandy had found him his chance.
"Patty. Such a pleasure. Nice to see you again." Ash said as he walked towards Clay, "So, what'd you think?"
"I think Swanny couldn't ask for a better advocate." Clay told him, not knowing what else to tell his father.
"Take a real cold-hearted bastard not to give him a Purple Heart now." Ash said as he put his arm around his son, leading him away from the stage.
"Thanks for stepping up." Clay said.
Before Ash had a chance to respond his phone started buzzing in his pocket, "One second. Spenser here. Congressman Zuckerman. Oh, you saw it? Yes, sir, it's hugely important. No, I-I can do that. Absolutely. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Congressman Zuckerman from the Armed Forces Committee?" Clay asked in unbelief.
"This guy draws a lot of water, Clay. Could be just the guy we need to fast-track that Purple Heart for Brett. All because of you, kid." Before Clay had a chance to answer his father's phone rang again...and again...and somewhere between the third and forth calls Clay just walked away.
Sitting down in his car he blinked away the tears as he drove straight to Emma's house.
"Where are the tacos?" Emma started to ask as she turned around, stopping when she saw the look on Clay's face, "What happened?"
"Ash...he uh...he stepped up..."
"That's great!" Emma said happily wrapping her arms around Clay's neck where he buried his face into her shoulder. "We will get you through this." Emma said as she felt his body shake as he gripped onto her and he felt him nod his head this was not just about Brett...it was so much more...she could feel just how overwhelmed Clay was with life and she knew that the only way to bring him down was to hold him...talking it out...that wasn't going to help. In the moment everything was just too much.
Once Clay had relaxed, Emma ordered a pizza the two of them sat down on the couch to watch Harry Potter. "Opp went sideways. Ray got separated from the rest of the team...they had to throw it in order to go get him...Shaw is pissed...but everyone is okay from what I heard today." Clay told her.
"Ray?"
"He is okay." Clay told her and watched as she nodded slowly.
"Is my Dad okay?"
"Haven't talked to anyone from the team...just heard chatter as I was leaving." Clay told her.
"Did you try to call?"
"Phones all go straight to voicemail."
"Even Mandy's?"
"You have Mandy's number?" Clay asked, surprised, even he didn't have her number.
"Yeah...I am only suppose to use it in emergencies but she gave it to me just in case..."
"I don't think this constitutes an emergency." Clay smiled at her.
"Is Davis back in town yet?" Emma asked him.
"Haven't seen her if she is...should be soon though. Her training was set to finish this week but I don't know where she is going to be sent...Bravo isn't a guarantee."
"She said she would be here when Bravo comes home though?"
"Yeah. She might be back now, I just haven't heard from her in a couple days." Clay shrugged.
"It's hard to believe we might never go outside the wire together again." Ray said as the team walked down the tarmack to where Mandy was walking towards them, having just stepped out of a Jeep.
"Shaw's got his head so far up his cake-eating ass." Sonny grumbled, "Hate to see what the world's like without Bravo in it."
"Indian intel source places Khan in Lahore tonight for a high-level meeting." Mandy told the boys.
"I hate to be a buzzkill, Mandy, but Shaw grounded us." Ray reminded her.
"Indians can't escalate their standoff with Pakistan. We're the closest American unit in the theater. This call will be above Shaw's head." Mandy smiled at Jason.
"One last rodeo. Bravo rides again." Jason smiled first at Mandy, then at his brothers, thankful that Mandy had once again saved him.
"Indian intelligence received confirmation from an embedded agent: Khan stayed local, and is holding a meeting tonight to coordinate a multipronged attack, likely in retaliation for being targeted." Mandy told the team.
"Gentlemen, this continues to be an extremely volatile situation. The entire region is on high alert, both sides of the border." Eric told the team.
And an urban environment means even less of a margin of error. This needs to be a flawless operation." Shaw interrupted.
"The target building sits in the middle of the city, in the timber district." Mandy added.
"Populated area means lots of eyes and ears. Attracting any unwanted attention will send this op sideways in a hurry. Zero footprint on this one." Eric said as he looked at the map.
"All right, now that everybody's ears are up, it's gonna be tough sneaking into Pakistan under their noses." Jason said, standing up.
"Yeah. An industrial zone is fed by a river that runs into Lahore from India." Ray pointed out.
"We'll swim in?" Jason asked.
"Yeah, swim." Ray nodded.
"Khan is a treasure trove of intelligence. This could be the most significant capture since KSM." Mandy told them.
"Capture?" Sonny asked, "Uh-uh. We're toe-tagging that son of a bitch for what he did to Bravo 6." Sonny practically growled.
"Listen, I know you all want justice for Clay, but Bravo could win a lot of friends at the Pentagon and at Langley if you bring Khan in alive." Mandy said, looking only at Jason...if Jason saw what she was trying to do the rest of the team would fall in line. Bringing Khan in alive would keep Bravo together, any less...they were done.
"Capture it is." Jason said, staring at Mandy who gave him a slight nod.
"Saw your dad on TV last night." Harrington said as he walked into the cages where Clay was getting ready to leave for the night.
"Oh, what's he grandstanding about now?" Clay asked sarcastically.
"Brett Swann."
"That right?"
"Yes, that is right. It's ironic how your father picked up the very fight that I ordered you to put down."
"Yes, sir." Clay challenged.
"Good frogman uses every tool in their kit to succeed. I hope Ash gets Swanny what he deserves." Harrington smiled at him before walking out.
Clay didn't realize he had been holding his breath until the man was gone and he fell to the nearest crate. "Holy shit." He mumbled after catching his breath.
"Contact's here. Gear up." Jason ordered the next night as they were getting out of their dive gear. Watching as they climbed into a beat up old painters van before pulling out of the garage under the darkness of night.
The team knew that this was their last chance...that if even one tiny thing went sideways they would never be on the same team again. By the book, yes sirs and command titles and all. They knew this wasn't a game. As both Eric and Mandy listened in on overwatch they were elated that the opp went off perfectly.
Once the team was back to their plane Mandy immediately downloaded all photos the team had taken and took that info straight to Shaw. "Commander Shaw, we just confirmed that Bravo killed four of the most wanted terrorists in the region tonight." Mandy managed to tell Commander Shaw with a straight face, annoyed that the man had flown there to watch the mission fail in person...only Bravo was better than that. Bravo was as good as their reputation led people to believe. Bravo got the job done.
"Tell you what, Shaw's got some pair, hitching a ride with us." Ray said as he reached into the cooler to grab a beer.
"We should give Commander Yoko Nono the Argentinian elevator treatment." Sonny said once Bravo was in the air headed back to Guam.
"I tell you what, Shaw's gonna be headed for a long-neck enema if he tries to turn this plane dry." Jason said as he opened his own beer.
"Yeah, well, I don't think he's gonna be interested in tangling with you. Shaw just got his legs cut out from under him." Eric told the team.
"You want to tell me what in the hell you're talking about?" Sonny asked.
"What I'm saying is, is that in addition to capturing Khan, you boys just took out four of the most wanted terrorists in the region. Shaw is gonna get laughed out of D. C. if he tries to take out Bravo." Eric smiled.
"Looks like the band ain't breaking up any time soon, 'cause we're back." Jason said standing up and raising a beer.
"Look, we've taken our share of lumps this deployment. Some of 'em were self-inflicted, but you guys kept pulling yourselves up off the mat. In the end we took out the son of a bitch who took out Clay." Eric said raising a bottle next to Jason. "Never out of the fight."
"Never out of the fight." All of Bravo Team repeated.
"Cheers to that." Ray smiled.
"Cheers, bud." Sonny said.
"Cheers." Jason smiled as he turned to Mandy and mouthing a silent thank you.
"Hey. How'd it go with the congressman?" Clay asked Ash as he sat down next to him at the bar over lunch.
"That man can talk." Ash said before turning to the bartender, "Can I get a whiskey on the rocks, make it a double?"
"Isn't it a little early for a double?" Clay asked.
"Politicians will do that to you."
"So? What, is he, is he gonna push for the Purple Heart for Brett?"
"Congressman Zuckerman definitely views Brett's case as an opportunity to spread the word about the need to change the way that we treat our vets, but the only change that clown is really interested in is moving his ass to the Senate."
"Yeah, well, doing what's right and self-promotion aren't mutually exclusive."
"Zuckerman made it clear if the military were to start retroactively awarding Purple Hearts, it'll just open up all kinds of floodgates for legal issues, creating huge financial burdens."
"Brett's not getting a Purple Heart."
"No, he's not, but I'm gonna keep banging on the drum."
"Maybe it's time to let it go."
"I'm not letting it go. In a few years you're gonna be a vet. I'm not gonna let you suffer the same fate. And, look, I want this for Swann. I want this for all the vets. But mostly I want it for you."
"Thanks, Dad." Clay told him, not sure how much he wanted to put his heart on his sleeve.
"Bravo comes home today." Ash told Clay, "You officially cleared to be back on the team?"
"Was never off Bravo...and yeah. Davis is taking me to get the final clearance to be active again...she should be here any minute."
"Jason's kid...Emma...she isn't taking you?"
"Mikey got back last night, she is spending time with him and we didn't think he would want to spend the day in the VA." Clay shrugged, looking over and seeing Davis walk in.
"Ready to go?" She asked, walking over and ignoring Ash.
"Yeah." Clay smiled nervously at her before looking towards his father.
"I've got this. You go. Good luck." He smiled.
"Thanks for trying." Clay said before following Lisa out to her car.
"He couldn't get Brett the heart?" Lisa asked once they were in the car, she could recognize Clay's pouty face the second she had walked into the bar.
"No...he said he isn't giving up though...we'll see. Just feel like I failed him...you know?"
"Emma told me you have been having a hard time...you know I am here if you need to talk...right?"
"Emma told you?" Clay asked, surprised that Emma would share something with anyone.
"She just said between your leg and Brett things haven't been easy...asked me to keep an eye out is all." Lisa told him with a smile. "What do you tell that poor girl?" She asked with a chuckle when she saw Clay visibly relax.
"I uh...I told her I could be Brett." Clay said, looking at Lisa and waiting for her reaction.
"I am sure a lot more went into that conversation." Lisa told him, "You know you can always call me...I know it is easier for you to talk to her...two of you are freakishly connected...but I've got you." She said and Clay was thankful that she didn't pry.
"I am scared that the doc won't clear me since I still can't feel my leg." Clay told her, finding the guts to open up even more as she put the car into park.
"You will get cleared." Lisa smiled, "Let's go...we don't want to be late." She smiled at him.
"All right, let's go, boys. Wheels up America in 15 minutes." Sonny said with a grin that spread ear to ear as he wheeled his bag towards the door.
"Relax, Sonny. Freedom bird ain't going nowhere without us." Ray told him with a shake of his head.
"Yeah, and technically we're in America right now, dumbass." Brock laughed.
"Ugh, just go back to not talking, Brock." Sonny groaned.
"Man, look at you. I ain't seen you grinning like that for months, Ray." Sonny smiled at Ray as he watched him pack up the last of his things.
"Oh man, that's my "18 hours from kissing my babies" grin." Ray smiled, a grin even bigger than Sonny's attached to his face.
"Yeah. Must be nice to have somebody to come home to." Sonny told him.
"Yeah, just hope I get a warm welcome." Ray said, his grin turning into a nervous grimace.
"Oh, you weren't exactly husband of the year in this deployment, but then again, you didn't cross any lines of fatal variety." Sonny assured him. "Naima will have your back, like she always does."
"Hope so." Ray shrugged.
"Ha. Look at you, huh." Jason smiled seeing Sonny's bags packed and totally ready to go, "Usually I got to drag Sonny out of the sandbox."
"Aw, come on, I just want to get back and see Clay and reunite the team." Sonny told the boys.
"Sonny's got deployment fever. What's her name?" Jason smiled.
"Yeah, and not her dancer name." Trent laughed.
"Yeah. Oh, man, I just want to get the hell off this cursed island. Let's go, boys." Sonny said shaking his head as he led his team...his family out the door for the last time.
Before Clay was even out of the doctors office he was texting Emma. "We meeting her before?" Lisa asked him when he finally put his phone down.
"No. She is spending time with Mikey...we will meet her there." Clay shrugged. "You excited to have Sonny back home?" Clay asked her with a knowing smile and knowing she would change the subject.
"It's not like that." She tried to tell him.
"Whatever you say Davis, but I've never seen Sonny take himself out of the game voluntarily before the two of you started spending more time together." Clay teased her as she drove towards the airstrip.
The closer they got the bigger the smiles came on both of their faces, their boys were coming home...their family would once again all be in the same place at the same time. Clay was halfway out of the car before she even had it in park and she called out to him, lifting his cane towards him, "Hey!" Lisa smiled at Clay, she knew he was officially done with the cane.
"No, I'm good." Clay smiled.
"Oh." Lisa smiled, the doctor had told him he didn't need it anymore a few weeks ago but he still liked to keep it with him, just in case...guess now that the boys are back in town he didn't need the thing anymore. Smiling she got out of the car and walked towards Emma and Mikey, following Clay as he practically ran over. "Damn, you look so grown up." Lisa said as she pulled Emma into a hug.
"Oh, don't remind my dad." Emma smiled, thankful that Lisa was finally back in town.
"What's going on, buddy? How's it going, dude, huh?" Clay asked Mikey with a smile when he walked over to him.
"I'm good." He answered with a nervous smile. "How's your leg?"
"It's good. Leg's gonna be fine." Clay smiled before looking up and seeing the team walking towards them.
"Yeah?" He started to ask but then looked up to see his dad walking towards them and took off for his Dad, Emma close behind.
"Ah. Look at you. Ah!" Jason smiled as his kids ran into his arms. When he let go he looked up to see Ray walking towards his car just as Jason called out, "Ray. Where's Naima?"
"I, uh I didn't tell her I was coming home today. I need to go to her. I owe her that much." He said.
"It's gonna be good." Jason told his best friend.
"Hope so." Ray told him before quietly slipping away in his car.
"Look at you, cowboy." Sonny smiled at Clay as he pulled him in for a hug.
"What's going on?" Clay asked, his cheeks burning, not used to smiling in so long.
"Ah, yeah. We got that guy that de-Playgirled your leg." Sonny told him.
"That doesn't surprise me." Clay smiled.
"Yeah. Alive." Sonny said quickly and Clay knew there was more to the story than that.
"Now, that surprises me." He said.
"Sonny Quinn." Lisa smiled, pulling Sonny away from Clay and Clay was quickly passed around the rest of Bravo.
"Ah, look at you, looking pretty damn good for a cake-eater." Clay heard Sonny tell Lisa before his attention went to Trent and Brock.
Once he was passed around he heard Jason's voice from behind him, "Hey, Sunshine. Look at you." Clay quickly went into his arms, inhaling the smell of home as Jason held him longer than he had his own kids. Hell, he didn't know if he would ever get to see him alive again...and despite the fact that he had talked to him on facetime a few times it just wasn't the same.
Emma pushed them to the truck with Mikey saying something about Tacos but all Jason could focus on was that Clay was alive and well...and walking without a cane or any crutches. "I am fine. Really." Clay smiled as he took his place in the front passenger seat of the truck, Emma right behind him.
"He can't feel part of his leg but he is good to go. Full range of motion and everything." Emma smiled as she was quick to rattle off what Clay had told her over text less than an hour before.
"Can't feel it?" Jason asked confused.
"Doctor says it is normal." Clay shrugged.
"But you are okay?" Jason asked again as he pulled out, the rest of Bravo already long gone.
"I'm fine Jace." Clay smiled, feeling Emma's hand on his shoulder. "Let's get tacos."
"Hey." Emma smiled as she walked into the dining room a couple days later to find her Dad sitting in the dark.
"Hey." Jason answered, holding a photo of her brother in his hand.
"Remember how Mikey hated being away from home? All he does now is talk about how great Bridon is." Emma said, anxiety creeping into her chest at where this conversation was quickly going.
"Yeah." Jason said, resigned to what he knew he needed to do for his kids. "Mm. His coach called me. They want him to, uh, stay the summer and train there." Jason told his daughter.
"What? You'd let him stay?" Emma asked surprised, excited for Mikey but also scared for her Dad.
As he held out the photo to show Emma even though she was the one who put the photo there. "Look how happy he is. I just want him to be happy."
"It's too expensive. You can't afford it." Emma reminded him, knowing that he was about to tell her the house was going up for sale.
"Got it figured out." Jason told her, looking down at his hands.
"But you'll be alone." Emma told him.
"Yeah. Maybe sooner than I'd like." Jason said, looking up at his daughter.
"What?" Emma asked, now even more confused.
With a nervous smile Jason told Emma, "Been looking into Tisch's summer program. And it's a great opportunity to work with incoming freshmen and work with, uh, visiting faculty."
"You sound like a brochure." She smiled back.
"What? Saw it on the website, and And I think it'd be good for you." Jason told her, looking towards the kitchen and not at her face.
"I don't understand. You've been fighting me going to college this whole time." Emma said, worried that maybe her Dad had gone off the deep end or something.
"Emma, you know, my job is to protect people. It's what I do. And with you, you know, going off to college, being so far away, I'm thinking, how am I supposed to protect you?"
"Protect me from what?"
"Don't know. Bad choices, bad people, things happening, you getting hurt, but that's not rational. It's not rational. You know, that kind of fear just eats you up inside, and it's undermining, and I don't want my fear to ruin your future."
"You just woke up one day in Guam and figured that all out?" Emma asked in awe at her father.
"I just woke up and I decided to work the problem, and I'm I'm gonna work the problem." Jason shrugged, trying not to hyperventilate before Emma jumped towards him wrapping him in a tight hug.
"Love you." Emma told him and Jason pulled her down onto his lap and held her, allowing a few silent tears to fall from his eyes.
"You have already packed most of the house for me, how long have you known?" Jason asked her.
"I saw Mom's old boss leaving the house a few weeks ago." Emma told him before asking, "Where will you go?"
"I will get an apartment on base...will go visit you and Mikey when I am home and for holidays...I don't know...I thought we could just go to Grandma Linda's."
"Won't you be lonely?" Emma asked, leaning her head on her Dad's shoulder.
"I've got Bravo to keep me company." Jason shrugged, "It shouldn't be up to you to take care of me...besides, you have spent the last year taking care of Mikey and Clay. You need to put yourself first this time."
"You talking about me again?" Clay asked as he let himself into the house.
"Hey Pretty Boy." Jason said, looking behind him where Clay was now standing, "I just told Emma I want her to go to Tisch's summer program."
"That starts in like two weeks, doesn't it?" Clay asked.
"How do you know when it starts?" Emma asked, standing up and crossing her arms.
"I uh...I may have..." Clay stumbled over his words.
"Kid sent me the info about it last night."
"You are the reason he suddenly changed his mind?" Emma asked with a huge smile.
"Hey now, I think I get the credit for this one." Jason said, crossing his arms and trying not to smile, seeing Emma smiling right in front of him she looked so much like Alana. "I worked the problem."
"You both...you...how did you know I would want to go to the summer program?"
"We know you." Jason and Clay said at the same time.
"What about you?" Emma said, looking at Clay, "And you?" She said looking to her Dad.
"Bachelors living the single life." Jason shrugged and Clay laughed.
"You are freaking ridiculous." Emma said rolling her eyes.
"So does that mean you are actually selling the house?" Clay asked Jason.
"I think it is the best solution...can't get the numbers to line up any other way." Jason shrugged.
"What are you going to do with the car?" Clay asked him.
"Will get a storage unit until I figure out something...but there isn't a reason to have a house this big when it is only me living in it and I am gone most of the time."
"We still going to have dinner here after Brett's service tomorrow?" Clay asked.
"Until the last box is moved out...this is home." Emma told Clay, reaching out and taking his hand.
"You planned the service?" Jason asked Emma who nodded.
"Couple calls with his sister and Harrington. Pretty basic but I think it would be what Brett would want." Clay said, squeezing Emma's hand, "Just wish he could get his purple heart."
Looking at Clay and Emma with their hands squeezed tight Jason looked down at his own hands, "Where you staying tonight Kid?"
"Emma is going to take me home, we are going to get some of Brett's things to give to his sister..."
"Then we will be back here." Emma said as she let go of Clay's hand to put her arm around him, "Also, fun fact, all of you need to be clean shaven because you have to wear your dress blues."
"I am going to go meet Mandy. Two of you be here when I get back?" Jason asked, standing up.
"Can be." Clay said.
"You okay?" Emma asked her Dad, walking over to him as he stood up.
"Trying to be Kiddo." Jason told her as he kissed the top of her head as he looked at Clay who nodded sadly.
"What are you doing in there?" Emma asked when Clay had been in his bathroom for a half hour. When she didn't get an answer she walked over and opened the door, "I'm coming in."
Seeing him in front of the mirror, razor out to shave but still with a beard on his face, his gaze was locked on his purple heart that sat on the counter next to his trident pin. "Is it wrong for me to give him mine?" Clay asked, turning his head to face her.
"I think that would be quite the show you would be putting on for the cake eaters that will be there." Emma said as she gently touched his arm, "I think Brett would get a kick of of it."
"I just...he deserves it more than I do."
"I have all your stuff ready to go. Do you want to shave now or in the morning?" Emma asked him as she picked up his electric shaver, putting it on the lowest setting aside from being clean shaven and she turned it on, looking at him questioningly he nodded and she hopped up and sat down on the counter, her standing between her legs and she shaved his beard. When she turned off the shaver he immediately dropped his head to her shoulder and she held him.
This was real. Brett was gone. It could just as easily be him they were burying. "She wants me to speak tomorrow." Clay said, knowing that Emma already knew. "I just feel like I failed him."
"You are the right person to share his story. You knew him probably better than anyone...and you know what it feels like to be where he was. Not everyone knows what that feels like." Emma said as she put her hand on his cheek, stroking it softly with her thumb.
"I would feel better if you could be with me there tomorrow." Clay told her as he took a shaky breath in.
"I will be there, you know that."
"I meant next to me."
"You will be fine." Emma smirked.
"You ready to get back home?" Clay asked her, walking out into his bedroom.
"In my Father's house are many mansions. If it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also." The minister said before calling Clay up to the front of the church.
Taking a look to where he knew Emma was sitting and focused on her. "What can I say about Brett Swann that we don't already know? Brett was he was a great man. Check. To me this moment isn't about Brett. It's about failure. Brett took his own life. That's not why his life is over. He was found in a parking lot, but he didn't die there. He died in Afghanistan with his best friend Nicky. Every moment that Brett was living past that contact, he was only sleepwalking, because he was hurt and he was changed. I know because I was there for the last few months of his life. He was..." Clay took a shaky breath and Emma nodded, "he was helping me, and he did help me. Brett Swann was a hero. Injured in combat, killed by war. And he deserved to be honored as such. And that didn't happen because I failed to make it happen. So I'm going to, uh I'm gonna leave it up to some other people to talk about what kind of a man Brett was. What I'd like to do is apologize. I'm sorry our country failed you, Brett. I'm sorry that our politicians failed you. I'm sorry that the VA failed you. Most of all, I'm sorry that I failed you. I failed to get for you an honor which is rightfully yours. You deserved better than me. Than us as a nation. Every vet deserves better than what they got. That's it."
When Clay finished he looked at back at Emma and noticed for the first time that Stella was in the seat next to her with tears in her eyes. Clay quickly darted his eyes to Jason before punching the gold trident into the casket next to his very own purple heart. One by one every SEAL in the building came up and did the same thing with their tridents, putting a hand on Clay's shoulder. By the end of the day Clay was completely exhausted and limping slightly and Jason noticed, quickly pulling Clay aside and pushing Emma towards him. "Take him home." Jason ordered and both Emma and Clay nodded.
Not two minutes later Stella pulled up to the curb and both Emma and Clay climbed into the backseat. As Emma went around Clay's apartment putting the last of Brett's things into the closet for Clay to deal with at a later date as Stella talked with, and tried to comfort Clay. "Thanks for letting me invade your life." Emma heard her say to him
"Sure." Clay mumbled.
"I mean, not that I had a right. No, friends have the right. Watching you deal with everything the last couple weeks reminded me of, um why you stood out. You know, at the bar, the night we met."
"I don't really feel much like the man I was when we met." Clay said, and Emma frowned, so much has changed in such a short period of time and it killed her to see Clay shutting himself off to Stella.
"That's 'cause you're not. You're an even better man." Stella told him and before Clay had a chance to say anything back she walked into the living room.
"Ready?" Clay asked, standing up, ignoring Stella.
Emma shrugged as Clay climbed back out of the car at the bar...that Jason had told her specifically that she was to come to despite being underaged.
Clay stuck close to Emma as the rest of Bravo and all of the rest of the guys from the teams took turns telling stories about the glory days or memories they had with Brett.
"So how did everything go?" Jason asked Mandy, when he finally made it a few feet away from Clay and Emma.
"Fine. They weren't happy with the decision that I made, but my reasoning was sound, and they saw that." Mandy told him, looking over her shoulder to where Clay sat with Emma.
"No, no, they never see everything. Far as I'm concerned you saved our asses, and I'm never gonna forget that, Mandy." Jason told her.
"I know."
"What's going on?" Jason asked, knowing that she wasn't telling him everything. "You okay?"
"I'm fine."
"I'm not buying it. I know you, something's up."
"I'm tired." Mandy deadpanned, now was not the time to have the conversation he was fishing for.
"Yeah?"
"You should probably say something. Everybody's gonna want to hear from you." Mandy told him and Jason knowing she was right stood up.
Walking first past Emma and Clay he walked towards the center of the room. "I got something to say. I'd like to make a toast." Jason started as he looked at a note paper in his hand. There are 46 special operators in this room. 655 years of total service. 439 years of deployment. 130 of those years deployed to war. There are 21 divorces among us. 54 kids affected by those breakups. 17 Purple Hearts. 104 Bronze Stars. Three Silver Stars. There are 24 shoulder and arm surgeries. 64 leg and ankle surgeries. 22 back and neck surgeries. And 34 people in this room with hearing loss. And all of us with a little bit of what Brett had. Every single one of us. That's a lot of pain for us to, to carry around, but I'm not trading that pain in for anything, 'cause that's what makes us who we are."
"Yeah?" Ray smiled to his friend.
"Cheers." Jason said, followed up by a chorus of cheers from around the room.
Once the team started to split off Jason took Emma and Clay home. "Where you going Jace?" Clay asked as he laid back on the couch.
"Out. Meeting Mandy." Jason said.
"Before she leaves for DC?" Clay asked.
"DC?" Jason asked.
"She didn't tell you?" Emma asked.
"Davis said she was going to San Diego for a few weeks and Mandy was being sent off to DC."
"I will be back." Jason snapped before slamming his way out the door wondering how Mandy could not tell him she was leaving.
"You are leaving?" Jason asked when Mandy arrived at the cemetery.
"You know I have to get the next package...I don't live here." Mandy reminded him. "You want to tell me what this is really about?"
"Everyone leaves." Jason said, sitting down at Alana's headstone.
"You know how to get ahold of me no matter where I am."
"Emma is leaving."
"She is going to college."
"Mikey left."
"To go to the school you sent him to."
"Clay is..."
"Clay is back."
"He is." Jason smiled.
"And you will be fine."
"You think so?" Jason asked her.
"You better be."
"I need you to keep an eye on my Dad when I am gone." Emma said, leaning into Clay's shoulder as they absentmindedly watched CNN.
"As much as he will let me." Clay said before asking, "Are you excited to go?"
"I would be if I knew you guys would be okay." Emma said, "I mean...I know you couldn't honestly tell me that you are okay right now."
"Maybe not but it shouldn't be up to you to worry about us." Clay told her, knowing it was futile...her heart...she couldn't just shut herself off from Bravo.
"I will come back to visit every chance I get."
"We can go to you too you know."
"You guys are hardly ever home...when you are it would be easier for me to come here."
"We can figure that out when the time comes...and we can facetime."
"Like all the time." Emma smiled.
"Will you promise me one thing?" Clay asked her, taking her hand in his.
"What?" Emma asked him.
"Promise me that when you don't hear from us or if we say something is fine but don't want to talk about it know that it is because we want to protect you...you are our world Emma..." Clay said, cutting her off before she had a chance to argue, "We need you to focus on you and as long as you are okay then we will find a way to all be okay."
"Okay." Emma agreed, knowing she didn't have a choice in the future, "But you promise me something Spencer."
"Spencer?" Clay smirked at her, "Go on."
"Promise me that you will find a way to stay pure." Emma said as she pressed her hand against Clay's chest, feeling his heart beating under her hand.
