Chapter 6 – I'm your summer girl.

November 30th, 2019

CPOV

I hear the faint sound of singing and humming. I open my eyes a bit and the room is filled with sunlight. I'm lying on my stomach and with one open eye I see Ana in the bathroom, organizing her things and unpacking her luggage to hang her clothes in the walk-in closet. She's wearing jeans and a faded t-shirt and after a while starts putting her hair up in a ponytail. She continues to apply a little makeup, singing softly as the sound echoes around the bathroom, she sounds so angelic. For a moment I wonder what it would be like to wake up to this everyday.

I feel like my world is in slow motion and as I continue to watch and hear her.

When you come home I feel the earth start to change
I am alive, I am alive, I am in love with this place
I love it most how you whisper my name
And so I catch it in a bottle for my lonelier days

Our moment slows inside the palm of your hand
Oh I could stay like this forever or as long as we can
And in the morning I pour a warm cup of tea
And hope you'll stay a little longer, stay a lifetime with me

'Cause when you go, like summer gaze to the rain
I am uncertain, but I'm certain I am losing my way
When you let go, I don't see straight anymore
I am unwanted, I am broken, I am losing my core

There is a door that opens and the sight of your face
I feel it all, I feel the warmth of every long summer day
And like an angel, you circle back with a kiss
You are the one I'm dreaming of, you are the one, you are the one

You lift me up with every step that I take
You are the reason, you're the answer when I'm drifting away
And through it all, when I start making a mess
You are forgiving, everlasting. You're my everything

You are the one (You are the one)
You are the one (You are the one)
You are the one who completes my heart.

When you come home – Mree.

As I take in the gravity of her words, I know it's just a song but I feel a sense of panic as a lump forms in my throat. I close my eyes tightly shut and turn my face to the other side. Fuck, fuck... fuck. What the fuck am I doing here? I am giving her the wrong idea and am I fooling myself right now for wanting something that is the very anti-thesis of who I am. I am so conflicted. Thank god for the call with Flynn this morning. Just as try to make sense of all these crazy thoughts, I feel Ana's hand caress mine. I slowly turn my body towards her and open my eyes as if I just woke up, she looks breath taking as she smiles.

"Good Morning Mr. Grey" she sings softly.

"It definitely is a good morning, Miss Steele." I smile back and she giggles. "What time is it?"

"It's just after 8 or so, I have to go and check in with the resort kitchen and event coordinator for the ceremony in the afternoon and to make sure the breakfast is good to go for everyone else... will you be okay here for a bit without me? I'll be back in 30 minutes." She says.

"Sure, I'll just sleep a bit more." I lie. I'm probably going to have a full meltdown and call Flynn immediately.

"Good, you do that." She kisses my cheek and with that she walks out.

I hear the door shut and get up. Fuck me. What am I doing? I remember last night and how good it was but then also all those feelings come back. Overwhelming feelings. Foreign feelings. When I looked into her eyes as we sat in the tub, time stood still. What the hell is happening to me?

I get done with the bathroom and grab my cell to call Sawyer and tell him to bring me a change of clothes from my room and to tell anyone who asks that I'm working out in the gym and spending some time in one of the resort conference rooms to get some work done.

Sawyer brings by my entire luggage instead. Over-efficient bastard. I get in the shower and by the time I'm done, I hear Ana open the door. I walk out in jeans sans shirt, drying my hair as Ana walks into the room looking for me and she freezes her mouth drops open a bit. I smile and walk to her slowly, and lift her face to me with my index finger "Like what you see Miss Steele?" She turns beet red and giggles. I give her a quick kiss and release her.

She tries to recover and fix her hair a bit to distract herself. "I was going to bring you breakfast in bed" she announces as I pick up my shirt to wear it.

"I can get back in bed if you'd like?" I offer and she shakes her head.

"Too late, you're all dressed now, I've set it on the coffee table in the next room." She tells me.

We walk out of the bedroom and sit on the couch and I see she's brought an assortment of things for me. Pancakes with berry compote, bacon, eggs, cut fruit, a few pastries, coffee and tea in front of us.

"How did you carry all this? I thought breakfast was at 10am with everyone" I ask a little stunned.

"Haven't you heard, I've got the place wired, Grey. The entire staff is at my beck and call." She teases playfully "I bonded with the chef and management during the planning process so they've got my back. They asked me what I wanted and I told them to surprise me. I didn't know how you liked your coffee so I asked for both milk and cream with sugar on the side and they had someone deliver it to my room.. but please let me know if you'd like anything else... I'll call up the kitchen and ha..."

I feel a surge of feelings and I do the only thing that makes sense to me. I grab her face and kiss her, interrupting her. I consume her and hold close to me, crushing her to me as she moans. She tastes of sweet berries. I'm intoxicated as she lets me invade her mouth, my tongue desperately taking all that I need from her. I don't know how long I take but when I'm done and break the kiss, pulling back from her face, it takes her a couple of seconds to open her eyes and she's in a daze as she looks back into mine. I hold her stare and she's lost. I can tell.

"Are you ready to eat, baby? I ask, my thumb playing with her bottom lip.

"uhhh... umm... I ... yes" she tries to find her words.

"Thank you for bringing all this, you didn't have to." I release her as I kiss her cheek.

She smiles shyly. "It's going to be a really busy day and I don't know how it will all go so I wanted to just spend a little more time with you before I disappear into the wedding festivities."

"When will I see you again?" I ask trying to hide the desperation in my voice.

She pulls out her phone to check the time. It's 8:45am. She tells me she has until 9:30 with me then she has to go play hostess during the breakfast welcome and then and get her hair and makeup done for the wedding this afternoon so I probably won't see her till the wedding ceremony.

Our conversation flows and it's a joy to see her eat. She's starving as she devours her pancakes. I try to take some and she refuses to share. "Uh, no... I'm starving so these are all mine. Focus on your omelette there." She giggles. She's so playful and sweet. We relax on the couch as she drinks her tea and I sip on my coffee. She goes quiet and I can tell she has something on her mind.

Before I can ask her she looks at me and I'm trapped by her gaze.

"Christian, I don't know what last night meant and I don't want to put any pressure on both of us to discuss it right now. All I ask is that you not act familiar with me in front of everyone, especially the family. I've told them all you're my boss and I will maintain a distance with you as long as we're in public. I hope you can understand."

To say I'm floored would be an understatement. I'm at a loss of words. Dare I say I'm a little offended and impressed at the same time?

"May I ask why?" the words escape me before I can stop myself and I realize I sound offended.

Her expression changes and I can tell she's regretting what she just said.

"It's complicated and a discussion like that requires time and my full attention both of which are a scarcity for me right now." She's full of sadness. "Please don't be mad at me." She pleads and she looks at me again with her beautiful eyes.

"I'm not mad Ana. I understand. I too am a very private man and I can understand the implications of certain situations. I don't want to make this weekend any harder than it is on you." I sa y truthfully.

She puts her teacup down and crawls into my lap and straddles me bringing her hands to my face. She holds my gaze and kisses me with her arms around my neck and hands in my hair.

"Thank you, Christian. I really appreciate this." She lays her head on my shoulder and I hold her feeling feel her heartbeat against my chest. Every moment with her is so meaningful.

A couple of minutes later she looks up and kisses me again.

"I have to change for the welcome breakfast, help me pick a dress?" I smile and agree.

We walk into the walk-in closet in the bathroom and she pulls out two dress options and styles them against herself asking which one she should wear. It's between an emerald green silk dress that reaches her ankles and has bows in the front or a structured pale blue dress in almost the same length. She'd look like a knock out in either one but I tell her I can't decide secretly hoping she picks the green because deserves to be adorned in silk only.

She holds them up both and looks in the bathroom mirror and settles on the green. Thank god.

"God Bless Rent the Runway."

"What's that?"

"Oh sorry, it's a service that allows you to rent designer dresses for an event. Cause there is no way in hell I can afford to buy a $1200 dress."

A part of me wants to call Caroline Acton immediately and have the best of the best delivered to her house.

I turn to exit and give her some privacy but she asks me to stay saying she'll be done in 2 minutes. I'm aching to touch her again. I'm leaning on the counter with the sinks and she walks across from me into the walk-in closet and starts to change into the dress all while humming and singing again.

Lightning in your eyes, you can't speak
Falling from the sky, down to me
I see it in your face, I'm relief
I'm your summer girl

I'm your summer girl
I'm your summer girl

Summer Girl – Haim.

I see her scars and I'm dying to know what happened but it may be to heavy a conversation for this moment. She turns and walks back out to where I am and stands against the counter to fix her make up and apply some eyeliner and mascara.

I'm your summer girl
I'm your summer girl

"You're always singing or humming." I observe. She suddenly stops and gets a little nervous. "Don't stop, I love hearing you sing." I say softly.

She looks down and smiles "It's the only habit of mine that I like if that makes sense." She confesses.

"What do you mean?"

"There was a time in my life when it got so quiet and I was so incredibly alone and trapped in myself that I had to find a way out. I started humming just to create some other sound, to feel something and then I'd spend hours browsing the Internet listening to all the music I could and now I can't stop. I mean as long as I can hold a note it's not so bad I think." She laughs and continues "It's second nature to me now. It's my brain's way of staying sane through everything."

"You can more than hold a note Ana. You hold the entire room, last night when you sang, it was such a revelation." I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear and her eyes close at my touch "What were you singing just now?"

"It's Summer Girl by Haim, the actual song is much better. Hold on." She goes to pull her phone from the jeans pocket and searches through her phone to play it and places the phone on the counter. The sound of the sax fills the bathroom and she starts to lightly sway as she finishes her make up and wearing her accessories. She looks up to me smiling and asks innocently "How do I look?"

I kiss her softly and take her in my arms and start dancing with her and swaying to the song. Spinning her and she squeals.

"Like a dream Miss Steele."

"I didn't know you could dance Mr. Grey?" She's asks breathless.

"Miss Steele, I've been known to have a few tricks up my sleeve, you'd be surprised. My mother made us take ballroom dancing when we were growing up. She said it was important to learn these social graces"

"I've always wanted to learn, it looks so beautiful but also so intimidating. I'd much rather freestyle."

"Freestyle isn't my thing, not in public anyway, so I guess you're the Yin to my Yang, Ana." The song ends and I lean in to kiss her again but we're interrupted by a phone call.

Ana accepts and puts it on speaker, still standing in my arms.

"Hello?"

"Ana, it's Madison from the front desk."

"Hey girl, what's up? Everything okay?"

"Um, so I wanted to confirm if you have authorized a Vishaal Kapadia to code a new room key for you because you lost it."

Ana immediately tenses and leaves my embrace, and switches off the speaker and pulls the phone to her ear and walks out of the bathroom.

Her tone changes, panicked and slightly authoritative.

"No Madison I did not authorize him. Thank you for checking in with me before... yes... yes I realize that entire resort is booked under the Kapadia account but please don't let him intimidate you with that. The only people who have authorization are Nita Steele and Katherine Kavanagh... I understand and I appreciate it. Listen I probably won't have access to my phone after we hang up since I'll be running around for the wedding. But I'll be in Kiran's bridal suite getting ready and then once the ceremony starts I'll be fairly visible so should any problem arise just send someone to find me and confirm anything."

She listens for a beat.

"No you don't have to do that. Just please put a note on my room account that under no circumstances are keys to be given to anyone else outside of the people I've listed and again thank you so much for everything. I really appreciate you taking the extra step to check in with me... sure thing... Thanks Madison, I'll see you soon."

I'm standing behind her and she lets out a breath and tries to stop herself from shaking. I am trying to keep my own temper in check but I have to be careful with Ana right now.

"Ana, is everything okay?" She takes a few seconds to compose herself and turns around to me tears in her eyes.

"It's just one of those complicated things that I can't tell you about right now." I caress her face and she leans into my hand closing her eyes as I pull her into an embrace and kiss her forehead. We stand for while till her body relaxes and her phone starts to ring, piercing through our moment again.

"I guess I have to head back out there and play hostess again" her voice is filled with sadness and with a small apologetic smile she adds "I'm sorry Mr. Grey but I'm afraid I have to kick you out. We can't be seen leaving the same suite together."

"A point well made Miss Steele. Will I have the honor of seeing you tonight or am I still too ignoble?" She giggles and the sound tugs at my heart.

"I think I can make an exception for you. By the way here's my room key. Kate has my other copy, I'll get it from her later on." She tiptoes and kisses me. She walks me out to the main door and I give her one last, long and deep kiss before I exit, hoping it will somehow last me throughout the day. I don't think I can ever get my fill of her.

APOV:

I close the door behind Christian and take a deep breath. Vishaal is hell bent on making my life difficult this weekend. I walk into the room to gather my things and head over to Kiran's bridal suite to drop it off. I stop along the way the way at Nani and Nana's room to say good morning and make sure they don't need anything and that breakfast was delivered to their room. Vishaal and Alia Khala are already there and a part of me wants to take the fork he's using to eat and stab him in the eye. I say my goodbyes and head to Kiran's Hacienda.

Kate and Mia are already there with the rest of the bridal party sipping on bubbly and nibbling on the breakfast that just got delivered.

"Steele!" Kate exclaims "where'd you go last night?"

"I got really tired so I went to sleep. Big day today and tomorrow." I smile avoiding her eyes. "Is Kiran up yet?"

"Yep, she's taking a bath and will be out soon. Isla called about 10 minutes ago and told us the makeup and hair team will be here in probably in another 15 minutes."

"Okay great. Listen can we talk out on the terrace for a quick minute?" I whisper when I see Mia is on the phone. Kate nods and we head downstairs to the great room and walk on the terrace. Thankfully it's empty.

"What's up Steele? You okay?"

I take a breath "Listen what I am about to tell you doesn't leave this space okay? It's imperative you promise me this stays between us till I say it's okay. Deal?"

"Deal." My darling Kate, always the team player.

"Okay so two things; a) I slept with Christian last night and b) Vishaal is trying to get a key to my room."

When I say Kate's eyes almost popped out of her head, I am not exaggerating.

"First of all, WAY TO FUCKING GO STEELE! Well I guess he's not gay then. I mean, HOT DAMN WOMAN!"

I can't help but giggle like a 13 year old and I can feel my face go blush red.

"How was he? COME ON, TELL YOUR GIRL. HOW MANY TIMES? ARE YOU SORE? TELL ME EVERYTHINGGGG" I'm almost certain she wants to climb into my brain to get a play by play.

"He was incredibly sweet. Definitely not gay. And 3 times?" I laugh out loud " It was... incredible. He took care of me. I was out in the garden and he saw Vishaal get physical with me and stepped into diffuse the situation. We ended up sitting by the fire and talking for a few hours. He's so different from the Christian Grey I see at GEH and hear about."

"Honestly, I didn't think he had a gentle bone in his body. He's so fucking stoic with like, a stick up his ass or something. But yeah, definitely not gay... I AM SO PROUD OF YOU. Get it boo. So fucking proud of you" Kate claps her hands in glee.

"I think it's just this wedding bubble we're in. I don't have any expectations to be honest. I'm ready for him to act like he doesn't even know me when we are back in Seattle. I don't want to be part of an HR disaster."

"I'll fucking murder him if he acts like that and what the fuck is wrong with you thinking like that? You are the best fucking human being I know in this world, he would be fool to let you slip." I smile at her, my passionate defender, always in my corner.

"Kate, it's seriously fine. Will it suck, yes but that's life and I'm okay with it." I confess even though I'm conflicted. "By the way, what happened with Elliot? Did you guys talk after my payback? Oh also, even Christian can't know that you know" I laugh.

"Well, we did more than talk. 4 times, baby. But for a beginner, you're definitely going to out do me in a week." Kate giggles. "I guess we both took the Grey boys to bed last night." I let out a howling laughter. What are the odds?

"Okay tell me about that asshole now." She changes track. I proceed to tell her about the phone call with Madison this morning and she's fuming, itching to murder Vishaal. She's the only one who knows my history with him apart from my therapist and my Nani who only has an idea of what's really going on between him and I. I'm so grateful Kate's a part of this wedding because I don't know how I would've survived alone. I tell her I need the copy of my key since I gave mine to Christian and she gives me a sly smile and smacks my butt in encouragement. Only Kate.

I go back up and see Kiran lying on the bed with her fluffy robe drinking champagne and relaxing. I give her a big kiss and say bye to everyone in the house before heading out to the breakfast area.

CPOV:

After leaving Ana, I felt uneasy. I'm not on my home turf and I can't really do much about Vishaal. I check the time and it's 9:45, I sent a quick text to Welch asking him to get me a background check on Vishaal Kapadia, ASAP. I head to the reception area and ask to book a conference room for the hour.

I get to the room, lock the door and call Flynn.

"Good morning Christian. Good to hear from you, how can I help?"

"Good morning John, I'm okay I just really need to make sense of what the fuck I've gotten myself into."

"Start from the beginning."

"Okay, I'm just going to lay it all fucking out there." I tell him everything. How I met Ana, at GEH and then randomly at this wedding and how watching her is pure fucking bliss and torture at the same time. How last night went, this morning and the issue of all these fucking foreign feelings and I'm feeling really off center.

"Hmm, well that's quite a lot that's happened this week." He muses.

"No fucking shit, Sherlock."

John let's out a throaty laugh and I can't help but chuckle too.

"Listen Christian, I need you to address what do you most fear from this encounter?" He asks.

"Flynn, I have never had sex with emotion or without restraint. The idea of that happening was absolutely foreign to me, I thought all that shit people talked about was just that... absolute shit but there's something about her. She is not afraid to show emotion, one second she can be crying and next she can be playful, she's completely in tune with herself and I'm just in complete awe."

"So you don't want her as a submissive?"

"I don't think she has a submissive bone in her body. Besides, after seeing her yesterday, she's got too much life in her to be caged in a role like that. Part of her charm is her being who she is. Having her as a submissive would be so unnatural."

"What about your issues of control then?"

"I honestly don't know. I haven't felt an overwhelming need for control since I've been here. I understand that also has to do with the fact that I'm at someone else's wedding and I'm just going with the motions of what's happening and none of it really directly affects my well being except with respect to Ana and these feelings I have towards her."

"Do you want to continue with her once you're back in Seattle?"

"Ideally, yes but I think I'd need to talk to her about it first."

"Does it concern you that she's your employee?"

"Yes a bit because I don't want to fuck up anything in regards to GEH."

"That's valid." Flynn pauses for a bit. "Have you had any nightmares this week?"

"Surprisingly, no. In fact I had a dream this morning. That's never happened."

"Interesting, tell me about it."

I tell him about the dream and silent panic attack that followed before Ana woke me up.

"Do you have any desire to remove yourself from this entire situation, I mean leave the wedding and just forget everything?"

"And risk Grace killing me? No thanks."

"Well, you've always been your own man, I doubt Grace can force you to stay there against your will."

"John, have you met Grace Trevelyan-Grey? She'd chop off my balls and feed them to the dogs."

Flynn laughs, "Yeah you're right, she's a force to be reckoned with for sure... Christian, I'm honestly really proud with how you're handling this. You're experiencing something very new and foreign in a place that is not your home base and that alone can be very jarring but you seem to be taking this slow and steady."

"I think it's a testament of who Ana is and the effect she has on everyone she interacts with. I mean John, you gotta see her in her element. Everyone gravitates towards her. Even Carrick opened up to her and he rarely speaks to people he doesn't know that well. Being with her... calms me."

"She sounds like an exceptional woman."

I can't help but smile. "She is."

"Do you want her to be your girlfriend?" John asks hesitantly.

"I don't fucking know. Yes and no. I've never done anything like this John. That's the part that scares me. She hasn't said anything and there's no way I can tell her about my... issues now. I mean. Fuck John."

"Christian, I really think that despite your issues as you say, you owe it yourself to maybe try and explore this avenue with Ana. She seems like a person who is very aware and with heightened emotional intelligence. Take it one day at a time, baby steps as they say. I'm always a phone call away. I know you hate it when I use the 30's mindset reference but I only use it a reference to give a starting point. Just because something worked for you for 15 years doesn't meant it will work for the next 15. Change is constant and our bodies and mind crave it despite our issues in some way shape or form. While in your case this a big change, it's also happening in a very gentle way. I'm not telling you to tell her how you feel about her unless you're absolute sure of what it is you feel for her. Maybe just allow yourself to enjoy this process? It will be educational."

"I understand what you mean John. Thanks for hearing me out."

"Oh and Christian, some advice as a friend."

"Yeah, John."

"Don't get a background check on her. Learn about who she is from her. Don't violate her privacy, I understand your need to protect yourself but really think about this before you go down that route. Give yourself this weekend to gauge who she really is. You're good at reading people, trust that instinct and trust the process of how this all will unfold. If you're going to give this a real shot then do it the right way. Trust her."

"I'll try my best John. Thanks for taking my call."

We said goodbye and I feel only slightly better. I can do baby steps I think. Oh fuck, I don't know. I check the time and it's a little after 10 so I head to the breakfast room to meet Mom, dad and Elliot. Not get a background check on Ana? There's so much I need to know...

I get a plate of small plate of cut fruit and sit with Mom and Dad. And we talk about the timetable for the rest of the weekend. I see Ana in the room walking around smiling, she high fives one of the groomsmen and hugs some of older women and men in her family. It's hard to keep my eyes off of her.

I hear a piercing cry from a child and see that there's a small toddler about age 3-4 years old in the middle of breakfast room crying for a reason that I can't fathom. Ana bolts in his direction and picks him up. Kissing him and asking him what happened. He holds out his hand and she kisses it and spins him around and the baby boy giggles. I'm frozen as I see this exchange. She takes him to one of the food station and hands him a piece of cheese to keep him occupied. As she walks back with him on her hip, she resumes talking to everyone. I suddenly hear Grace call Ana and I try to compose myself, not completely sure of how to handle her coming here.

Ana looks towards us and smiles walking in our direction still holding the boy.

"Good morning everyone! How's everything?" she says brightly.

"Everything's wonderful darling, you are a sight for sore eyes" Grace responds "Ana, I just wanted to take a moment and thank you for taking care of Mia in Cabo, she told me last night over dinner and I've been meaning to talk to you since then.

"Oh Dr. Grey, please don't thank me, it was nothing. I'm just so glad it wasn't serious and she was back on her feet enjoying the weekend with us." She replies and Grace gives her hand a tight squeeze. "Please call me Grace. No need for formalities, you feel like family to me already." Ana shyly smiles.

"Ana you must visit us when you're back in Seattle." Carrick chimes in. What the hell, who is this man? This is so uncharacteristic of him.

"Yeah Steele, you gotta come to our Sunday dinner sometime, mom makes a mean pot roast." Elliot adds.

Ana laughs and nods but she looks a little sad as she does.

"Aanapa, look I finished! I'm a good boy!" the toddler says. "Yes baby boy you did! Aanapa is so proud of you" Ana kisses his cheek and tickles him and he's loving all the attention but then asks to leave. She puts him on the floor and he runs away. Her light reaches and heals everyone. She turns back to us and looks to Elliot.

"How are you doing Elliot?" she asks as she gives him a wink.

"Oh I'm great Ana, I'm doing great!" He lets out a big laugh. She doesn't talk to me but gives me a smile and excuses herself to go and mingle with everyone else.

I feel a swell in my chest. Unfamiliar feelings again wondering things about a possible future that I know I do not deserve.


Authors Note: Yep, i'm about to drag this wedding out for the next five chapters but I really will focus on the conversations that Christian and Ana will have with each other and how her revelations will really test his emotional bandwith. Also, how affection will come pouring out of him for her. I always look for that in the fanfics because I'm a little over the whole controlling/dominant Christian. I'd like for him to shit some bricks for a change and you will see a lot of that in this story *evil laugh* but there will be his controlling streaks too just not as crazy as I'd read in some fanfics. What are you thoughts about the Vishaal situation? Hit me with your theories fellow fanfic lovers!

Music:

When you come home - Mree (you have got to hear this song, it's amazing. Also I imagine Ana's voice to be a mixture of Mree and Lolo Zouai's voice)

Summer Girl - Haim.

I created a pinterest but I'm struggling with it: /paleseptember10

P.S. What are everyone's plans for the weekend? I'm probably going to continute writing and post one more long chapter!