Stepping in to the kitchen to grab a glass of water, Lance saw the tall figure of Michael standing outside in the back garden. Putting down his now empty glass, he slipped out the back door and approached the killer.
"Michael?" He spoke quietly. The killer turned to face him. Lance felt his heart crack with sympathy. No trace of emotion in the killer's face, but Lance wasn't fooled. Lance lightly placed his hand on Michael's arm.
"Hi. She'll be fine," he spoke softly. "Strong painkillers, got stitched up, just has to be careful for a while. It's not even deep enough to scar. That tells all of us you acted fast as soon as you knew it was her. Don't beat yourself up man. I hate to say this, but as much as we love Jade, I think you'll find we all agree with you. She deliberately put herself in that position. Even she agrees with that."
Myers's gaze didn't once waver. Lance felt himself inwardly shiver. If he didn't know he was safe, he'd be running for his life under that look.
"You were craving the kill, she deliberately approached you then. She has no argument left. She should have come to one of us, or…" He threw his hands up in exasperation. "Shit I don't know… Something, but not that…"
A few seconds later, Alice entered the kitchen and saw the two men. Like Lance, her heart broke for Michael. Silently, she slipped out of the back door towards them and gently put her hand on Myers's shoulder.
"She's under sedative. They gave her some damn strong sleeping tablets and pain relief." Now, Lance smiled a little as for the first time he was sure of it, Alice fixed Myers with her stern mother look this time. "She deliberately approached you when it was dangerous, that was the wrong way to go about things. I know she was desperate to talk to you, but she can't blame you for this."
"That's pretty much exactly what I just said," Lance nodded. He could hardly believe his eyes when Alice took Michael's hand and gently pulled him back in to the kitchen and the killer allowed her to do so. He followed behind them, locking the back door. Alice felt Michael softly squeeze her hand, before he headed in to the living room. Lance turned to wash the knife, which he'd placed in the sink before they left for the hospital, having given Myers back his mask.
Just then, the door quietly opened in to the kitchen. It was Jade. Lance's heart clenched in sympathy. She looked terrible. Wearing only pyjamas, the bandage around her neck looked huge. Her face was deathly pale and she looked exhausted.
"Jade!" Alice said sternly. "You should be asleep!"
Jade gave a weak smile, but Lance didn't think he'd ever seen more sadness in someone's face before. "I can't," her voice was a small whisper.
Lance shot a glance at her neck. It wasn't bleeding.
"Mum," Jade looked at Alice, her eyes full of tears. Immediately, Alice pulled her close. "Can you take these?" Jade handed her the sleeping pills. Alice held her tighter.
"Jade," her voice also shook with tears now. "Is it because…"
"I don't trust myself," Jade said quietly, with a slight nod. Lance blinked fast. Pour girl. "Darling," Alice hugged her close.
"I can't," Jade broke down in her mother's arms. "Not again, Mum! I don't dare approach the bathroom, too much… Too much bleach! Too close! That hospital for 3 fucking months, can't do it again! Those damn cells, the Psychiatrists poking at me every fucking day, I've very probably lost Michael, now Dad regrets adopting me! I can't…"
"No way!" Lance and Alice said in unison. "Baby girl," Alice hugged her as tightly as she could. "No he doesn't, I promise you my darling, he was just…"
"A dick," Lance muttered, unable to stop himself.
"Quite," Alice agreed.
"I feel like I'm losing control," Jade said in anguish. I'm so close Mum! So, so close! Dad, Michael… I have to sleep down here, there's no bleach in that bathroom. I've already checked."
"You can't sleep on the sofa," Alice said firmly. "It's not that comfortable for you. Not with that bandage."
"Then what do you suggest Mum?" Jade asked, her tone utterly defeated. "There's no way I can sleep in our room for obvious reasons, not without Michael and…"
"Then take one of the spare rooms. I'll keep hold of your medication until you need it and I'll also remove all the bleach downstairs."
"You shouldn't have to."
"Irrelevant, I'm doing it anyway. Come on Mrs."
Lance smirked at Jade. Alice wasn't one to argue with. He joined her on Jade's other side and they supported her up the stairs. As Alice helped her in to bed, Lance grabbed the 3 bleach bottles he could see and carried them back downstairs. Just as he stepped in to the hall with them, the living room door opened and Myers stepped out in front of him. Lance had to stop. He couldn't get past. Myers pulled out his notepad then.
What exactly are you doing?
Lance hesitated for just a second. This wasn't his place to tell. But he was starting to think he might have to. How else was he going to explain 3 bleach bottles in his hand? Michael deserved the truth, out of respect for Jade.
"Mr. Myers," Lance kept his voice low. "I have had to move these, or Jade might try to or actually drink them. She tried once before and ended up in hospital. Alice has to look after her medication for the exact same reason. Excuse me, please can I get past? I should put these in the downstairs bathroom. I think you should know Jade has already checked this one and thank God there was none in there. Steve's words about regretting adopting her and her fear that she's lost you are pushing her very close to the edge."
He made to walk away but Michael gently grabbed his arm, raising his notepad.
"Please stop with "Mr. Myers."
Lance was sure he heard Myers softly sigh, as he now did walk in to the bathroom.
…
I stared at the one sleeping pill on my bedside table. I knew I'd done the right thing. I loved Mum, Jenna and the rest of them too much to try a second time. I was lying in mine and Michael's bed. I'd wanted to use one of the spare rooms, but none of the beds were made up. Mum offered to do it for me, but I said I was just being stupid and I'd be fine here. But lying on the sheets Michael and I had talked, slept and made love on hurt more than I thought. I debated moving rooms after all, making the bed up myself. I rolled on to my back and glanced up at the ceiling. Right now I hated my life. Just then, my phone rang. I picked it up without looking at the caller ID.
"Hello?" I didn't care how I sounded.
"Jade," said a voice I had no trouble recognising. Despite everything, a small smile now did cross my face.
"Hello Dr Sartain," I said softly.
"How are you doing? How is your neck?"
I didn't ask him how he knew, assuming Craig or one of the others had told him. "Painful," I said truthfully. "I can't wait to take my second lot of painkillers. Can take one every hour at the moment because it's such a deep cut and bloody agony."
"So maybe you should've looked where you were going when out jogging, eh? So many sharp stones around it seems on your particular route."
That stopped me short. Only Lance and Dr Twinkle knew of that particular lie. "How…"
Then, it clicked.
"It's you, isn't it?" My voice choked up with emotion. "You've requested to be my Doctor. How else would you know that?"
"Indeed I have."
I tried to speak, but tears clogged up my throat. I didn't just like, trust and respect Dr Ranbir Sartain now, I loved him.
"That's a quick within 72 hours," my voice shook. "I… I don't know how to thank you for this…"
"First thing you can do is tell me the truth. Doctor and patient privacy. Stone, huh?"
"You already know, don't you?" I said quietly. "So why do I need to?"
He sighed softly. "Yes, of course I do. That kind of cut would very rarely be caused by a stone, Jade. I think Dr Twinkle knew as much too. Jade," Now Sartain's voice was very gentle. Even more so than usual. "Was it because of Steve and the words you and Michael exchanged? Were you trying to… Shall we say, find a way out?"
"Are you asking if I was hoping he'd kill me?" I could hardly say the words. Ranbir Sartain was far too perceptive. The silence told me my answer.
"Well," he said eventually. "Approaching him during his killing crave, after he'd warned you to keep back from him? Am I not correct in my assumption?"
"Not consciously," I whispered now. I could hardly speak. "But I felt like I was losing control. When I came back from hospital just now, I told Mum to take my medication, which includes very strong sleeping tablets. I…" I took a deep breath. "I don't trust myself, Dr Sartain."
I'd put the phone on speaker when I'd answered it and now, I heard the bedroom door softly open. I had nothing to hide from whoever it was, so didn't move to put it on earpiece. Whoever it was saw I was on the phone and made to leave, but I quietly said, "please stay?" I heard the door close and footsteps approach my bedside, I still didn't look to see who it was. But now I'd started, I couldn't stop.
"I can't do it again," I whispered. The Psychiatric hospital for 3 fucking months, those damn Psychiatrists watching every move I made, that tiny cell, those kids… One attempted to set fire to the damn cell block! Another tried to stab a staff member with a plastic knife! Total fucking insanity, from kids! I knew I didn't belong there… But I just wanted out! I'd rather the attempt had succeeded than what actually happened! That was hell, Dr Sartain! Absolute fucking hell!"
"You know Steve didn't mean what he said, don't you?"
"Easy for you to say," I couldn't stop a small bitter laugh.
"I have to tell you this Jade, I don't believe for a second Michael would actually kill you. Look at tonight. As soon as he realised it was you, he drew back. You're still alive. He loves you Jade, as do the rest of your family. I'll say it again, Steve didn't mean a word he said to you."
Now I actually considered looking to see who my visitor was. What if it was even Dad? But I couldn't muster the strength. I felt too emotionally and physically drained.
"I will be over later to see Steve. I'd also like to see you face to face too. How are you feeling now?"
"You mean am I still considering a way out but this time consciously?" I was aware I sounded sarcastic, bitter, but I couldn't help it. "Um, considering Mum's now got my meds and Lance has just moved all the bleach downstairs, yes." I actually felt for just a second like a child about to have a tantrum. God, I hated everything about my life right then.
"Can I do or say anything to help you?" Sartain asked. I felt something inside me snap then. I was tired, scared of what I might do to myself, low, depressed, angry. Most of all, God I missed Michael…
"What? Like tell me I was an idiot for angering a masked killer? For approaching him when I unconsciously wanted to die? Which you've just confirmed? Thanks for that! Tell me how to take back words I said to him which I never fucking meant? Not for a second? Or how about the fact my Dad regrets adopting me? Do you want to tell me again he didn't mean it? You know what Dr Sartain? Don't bother! Michael hates me, Dad hates me! Even Mum yelled at me earlier! Scratch that, both Mum's did! I now know why my birth mother abandoned me! Like I had to guess too hard! I've never felt so hated in my life! I let my birth mother walk out the door and I… I…"
At this point, my throat clogged completely with tears this time and I couldn't go on.
"Why does what she says make any difference?" Sartain's voice was its usual soothing self. "Why care what she said, Jade? She was the one who walked out, treated you as she did, not you. It's her loss. As for wanting a way out, I have a feeling none of your family will even let you try. You raised the alarm this time, Jade. You told them how you felt. That takes more courage than actually doing the deed does sometimes."
I wanted to snap back, bullshit. But I didn't. He was the doctor, not me. "Do you know why Steve said that to you?"
"Because I went out to think when Michael needed a kill and he and Lance had to look for me. Then Mum told me something happened to Steve in the past and he has PTSD as a result. Something set it off and that's why he said it apparently, but I don't know details."
That was when I felt the bed move as someone got in next to me. I looked up and I can't lie, I actually felt my heart flip. Even now, despite everything, I felt it. It was Michael. He'd heard everything. Gently, he pulled me in to his arms. Tears filled my eyes immediately. Finally, oh finally, I was where I'd been desperate to be. I clung to him as hard as I could with my free arm.
"I'll say it again," Sartain said and his next words stunned me. It was as if he knew Michael had just made his presence known. "I don't think any of your family will let you even try. I have a feeling they'll be watching you tonight. Before you say it, parents and close family are very good at watching both children at once, Jade. Get some sleep, I'll see you later." With that, the phone beeped 3 times, as he hung up.
As soon as I'd put the phone back on my bedside table, Michael pulled me gently back to him. I glanced at his bedside table and saw my medication there. I wouldn't be able to reach it without him knowing. Sartain was right. Watching me was accurate. I had so much I wanted to say, but where the hell did I start? As if reading my mind, Michael raised his notepad.
Shh Jade. Not now.
But I had to say at least something. "Michael I'm really sorry," I started. "I know how it must've seemed to you, meditated etc, but I swear to you it was never meant to be that way. I…"
He silenced me, with a kiss. It wasn't brief either. It was the kiss Michael had almost literally knocked me over with that first day. His lips moved softly against mine as he took control. I felt my legs turn weak and was exceptionally glad I was lying down right then. Michael's arms tightened as he did so, gently pushing my head against his shoulder. Lightly turning it with one hand, I saw him looking at my bandaged neck. It made me feel even worse. What the hell had I been thinking?
"Please," I almost pleaded with him. "I have to say this. I was in shock in that car, so much death, blood…" I tried to shake off the memories. God knew how Lance was coping with them. "I knew I'd angered you when you held me at knife point and all I wanted was to tell you I love you. I wouldn't have left, knife or not. Then when I came after you later and…" I gestured at my neck, guilt threatening to consume me. "God Michael I'm so sorry! I don't know even now what I was thinking. Was I hoping unconsciously you'd kill me? Had I reached that point? I honestly, truthfully don't know. Was I trying to talk to you even through your killing crave? Darling I don't know that either. I just… I had to be close to you, that was all I could think. You warned me, that makes it even worse. Like I said, I'm a coward. I should've… I don't know, tried to…"
Again, he silenced me. But this time by a gesture I would never have expected from him. For the first time ever, he laid a gentle and warm hand against my cheek. Now my tears did fall. There was no way I was stopping them this time. He released me with one arm and again raised his pad.
Jade, shh, I said. Not now. It's ok. Just come to me. We'll talk this through tomorrow. You need rest.
"So do you," I countered. "But there's no way I'll sleep leaving things this way." He sighed, moving his head to take my lips again with his, then taking my hand. His was so warm, strong and safe, I squeezed it as tightly as I could.
Damn you Jade. What the hell have you done to me? He squeezed me closer. You've got in to my heart and head in a way I've never felt before! I'm Michael Myers, I don't… Didn't do love! Why do I feel so protective of you? Now your family? It's not… Wasn't me!
Before I could answer, he was kissing me again. This message had touched me so deeply, I couldn't have spoken for a few seconds anyway.
"You could ask how can I love a masked killer?" I breathed back eventually. "Same thing. I adore you Michael Myers, always have. Was it because you saved me from Andy? I don't know. But you also got in to my heart and head in a way I never would've believed. That's why I'm struggling so badly with what I said to you. Ok it's not by any means normal to kill people, it's horrible to watch and I hate witnessing it, so in that regard I stand by what I said desperately wanting you to talk to Dr Sartain, but I could never leave you! Not really! I just… I can't witness you kill up close! It's… It's…" Again, I didn't know how to finish. Not normal? It's psychopathic? None of those words seemed good enough. "A nightmare from hell," I eventually said, my voice shaking a little. Again, he sighed.
I will be starting to speak to Sartain tomorrow.
"Seriously?" I felt my heart leap in spite of myself and I think it showed on my face, because there was no way that was a slight but amused smirk on his lips?
Seriously.
"Thank you," I hugged him close. "Thank you so much! I'll say it again, none of us are expecting it to change overnight! But I know how big of a step this is for you and I acknowledge that completely! I can't thank you enough and I love you with all my damn heart, Michael Myers!"
He squeezed me close again, nodding slightly. So what if I'd refused?
It was a fair question. I considered for a second. Could I have left him? Would I? "I don't know," I said quietly and honestly. "I think I would've just tried to stay out of the way when you needed to kill, not witnessing it. Will you accept that as a future compromise?"
He nodded a little. I am sorry about tonight, Jade. I should've told you and Lance that you could leave. That wasn't fair on either of you.
"You were trusting my promise," I murmured. "I wasn't going to break it."
He sighed again, holding me tightly. That was also unfair. I should not have used a knife to keep you there, flat side or not.
"You were angry. You said yourself you don't think when you need a kill. So who am I to blame you? Same thing with…" I gestured at my bandage. "It was me who came to find you when it was dangerous. This injury is entirely my fault."
Oh, Jade.
He pulled me completely back against him and began to kiss me gently, but passionately. I looked up at him and felt my breath catch. I had to look twice to be sure I'd seen what I thought. I had. There was a tear in his eye. At the sight of it, I broke down completely.
"Why the fuck are you comforting me?" I sobbed. "You're the one who should be comforted for fuck sake! I approached you when you needed a kill! This serves me right! You should hate me right now!"
Shh, shh. Jade. I'm your husband. You should be able to come to me when you need me, angry or not. Not be told not to because I might hurt/kill you. That's one reason I am talking to Sartain. Even I can see that isn't how things should be for you.
"But it's who you are, what you do," I breathed. "Who am I to…"
Jade, shh.
Gently, he again turned my head to look at my neck. I didn't stop him. I knew Dr Twinkle had done everything she could, but of course Michael was going to worry. I didn't deserve him too admittedly, but I knew nothing I said would stop him, so I wouldn't try any further.
How is it? When did you last take painkillers?
If circumstances had been different, I might've smirked at him and said since when did you become a doctor? But not tonight. I knew he was being totally serious and humour didn't feel right just then. "I can take one every hour depending on the pain level."
So how is it?
I gave him a small but genuine smile. I was used to his blunt sounding, uncaring way of asking questions, when in fact the opposite was true. He wanted the answer because he was concerned about me. Again, my heart lurched with guilt. He should be saying well you deal with it, it's your fault you have it, but he wasn't. He would argue it was his. So maybe depending on your thinking it was, but not as far as I was concerned. It was entirely mine.
"Painful," I admitted. Actually it hurt like hell. But I wasn't going to tell him in those words. "I'm due another dose now anyway. It's already been an hour since Dr Twinkle gave me some in the hospital."
Are you telling me the truth?
I knew why he was asking. I'd wanted to kill myself just minutes before. "Yes," I nodded. "Check with Mum if you want." I wasn't being sarcastic either. I meant it. He shook his head.
Again, I'm trusting you, Jade.
"I didn't break your trust last time," I said very softly. "I won't this time either."
He handed me a tablet, as I picked up my water bottle. "Thanks," I murmured, swallowing it.
How bad is it? The pain? Don't lie to me, Jade.
"Pretty bad," I admitted. I couldn't look at him. I didn't want him to see my guilt. But he gently turned my head back to him so I had no choice. Jade, he wrote again and I understood. I sighed. "Really bad," I said quietly. "It really hurts right now. Nothing major has been cut in to, but Jesus it hurts! It's not deep enough to scar, but right now if feels like someone's set my neck on fire. Please," I added quickly. "Please don't apologise. It's my fault."
If you say so. I tend to disagree with you there.
"We'll agree to disagree then," I managed a small smile at him.
How can I make you more comfortable?
"You serious?" The question had slipped out before I could stop it.
Yes? Why would I not be?
"Sorry," I took a deep breath. "Do you want the honest answer?"
"As opposed to you lying? Yes."
I deserved that response. I took a breath and looked back up at him. "I'm sorry," I said softly. "That wasn't fair. Like this." Again, I laid my head against his shoulder, the bandages facing upwards. Now there was no pressure on it. He nodded, tightening his arms around me. I didn't think I would ever forgive myself for my part in tonight's events. If I was honest with myself, I now thought that having a scar would be what I deserved. I should be the one with a neck scar, not Craig. When he'd received his, he'd been trying to protect me totally and completely. He'd been stabbed because he'd warned me not to come downstairs. Me? I laughed bitterly inside. I'd got mine for being an idiot. Plane, pure and simple. Approaching a masked killer when he was angry because my Dad had upset me and I needed him, after I'd just told him I'd leave if he didn't stop killing. Yep, entirely my problem, my fault. I should be the one scarred for life.
There was a soft beep. I glanced at Michael's notepad. At the same time, he squeezed my hand.
Jade, stop it.
I looked back up at my husband, confused. "Eh?"
I can see what you're thinking as clearly as if you'd spoken out loud. Stop it. Neither of you should have a scar. Not you, not Craig. Neither of you should have been stabbed at all in fact.
"How the bloody hell," I stared at him in total shock. He smiled at me. I'm sure of it before showing the last message.
I'm your husband, Jade.
