"I don't need to see you to know"
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Sometimes the trivialities warmed the skin, or the songs subjected him to a relaxing heat and worth living and witnessing raw.
Naoki previously believed that every song had a very specific message embedded in its composition, in its lyrical structure, but nevertheless, he always ended up looking for the song that best described his current state.
The mathematical and physical formulas were not enough to explain such a phenomenon, or why his heart was racing when the lyrics described his feelings better than himself.
Neither having the best IQ or being the best student in Japan could discover everything that happened to him, and he also couldn't understand where the love for Kotoko came from; his intense attachment to her, the feeling of longing for her, which was the origin of everything.
Kotoko was her origin and her trigger to seek a change in his person. She was his guide in life, his compass for choosing and making decisions, his inspiration and his first love; Plus, she was his first kiss.
Naoki didn't need to see numbers to know it.
He didn't need to see an answer to know it.
The months passed and July arrived sweeping with scorching heat and the holidays were approaching with great speed that predisposed the young Naoki to postpone the fact of telling his father that he was already studying medicine.
He wouldn't say that it was fear on his part, what happened was that if he commented to him, he would have to give explanations. Explanations that gave him laziness to give.
However, Naoki knew that he must speak, so running away all the time would not lead to anything new, but to prolong it, to ramble on trifles that involved the loss of seconds that became minutes until months passed.
First of all, Naoki had his free time, since his classes that day had ended and returning home made him lazy.
He took a seat on a bench, putting on his headphones and began to search for songs among the playlist of the cassette that Kotoko gave him at Christmas, because even he didn't finish listening to it completely, more than two or three songs and the thing was left behind there.
As he searched, his eyes found something worth losing his concentration in less than a blink. His eyes found the figure that made him lose his mind, the reasoning, the logic of things.
That slender, strong figure, her hazel eyes, her straight black hair, length to the back, that walk so unique and deep.
His heart raced, collided with his chest, and returned to his spinal cord to repeat the same cycle of beats; likewise, his thumb, which was the finger that changed the songs, was stopped in a song that caught his attention.
The song of "No necesito verte (Para saberlo)" by Soda Stereo, vibrated from his headphones, creating a rhythmic and graceful dance, plunging him into the trance that his eyes captured with so much longing rooted in every particle of certainty.
Kotoko walked so naturally that he was hypnotized, strolling around the university campus with the walkman adjusted to the fold of her jeans at knee height, a short-sleeved blood-red polo shirt, her hair loose and dancing to the rhythm from the wind, her head held high, her arms moved with nobility adorning her pretty figure.
Naoki stared at her from his posture, enraptured by her substantial presence, which he loved so much to see.
He didn't need to see her to know that he loved her, to know that she was driving him crazy, to know that she had been an earthquake in his life since her first appearance.
He couldn't describe it in words, but it was true that this tumult of sensations that filled him like a chemical reaction about to explode, meant only one thing: Naoki loved her.
Without specifying it better, she noticed his presence as an idiotic lover and addressed him, smiling at him. A chill ran down his spine and went back to his head, freaking him out and he immediately took off his headphones.
"Naoki-kun" Kotoko greeted him, taking a seat next to him. He nodded at the greeting, returning it politely and stoically. "What were you listening to?" She asked curiously.
"Nothing relevant" He replied indifferently. The drive was eating away at him, for the corner of his eye focused his attention on Kotoko's hand, which rested on both sides.
"Do you have plans for the holidays?" She changed the subject, being as pretty about it as ever.
"No" He replied again in that indifferent gesture that unfortunately came as natural as if it were an action his DNA forced him to do. "And you, Kotoko?"
"Yes" She said cheerfully. "I will work during the holidays, I'm almost done with all my pendants to return to you." She paused. "I'm already excited about that!"
Naoki couldn't help but suppress a mischievous smile forming on his lips. Kotoko would finally live in his home again.
How eternal it was to live that funeral experience.
"How nice" He commented in a more pleasant tone. "Where are you going to work?"
"I don't know" She admitted, giggling nervously. "Actually, I have a lot of work ideas, but I still haven't decided which one is right for me"
"Why do you say you're going to work if you don't know where?" He huffed, grimacing sideways.
"Well" She laughed. "I'm still thinking"
"You think about things a lot, Kotoko" He said, glancing at her longingly, clearly disguising his feelings.
"Yes" She laughed softly. "Otherwise I won't be able to mature"
"Mature?" He repeated interested.
She agreed.
"I have to see all my options" She continued. "If not otherwise, I will limit my potential, and also I need to learn to mature, because that's the way we adults are"
"You think?" He questioned her, getting a nod from her. "Why do you see it that way, Kotoko?"
"Because I don't need to see it, to know it" She replied with a wide coincidence, so that his skin stood on end.
"How?" He exteriorized surprised.
"What thing?" She blankly gestured.
"What you just said" He replied uneasily. Seeing that she didn't understand him, he added: "What I meant was that you didn't need to see it to know it."
"Ah" She said, understanding him. "I meant that I don't need to see things to know that it is essential for me, the fact of being able to mature with the passage of time, such as for example" She raised his index finger. "Taketo has been behind me, and I gave him an opportunity, but upon getting to know him better I realized that he is a very good boy." He tightened his jaw. "But he is not the person I like, and what it has to do with maturing is that I noticed my feelings, and I also realized what my reason gave me to understand"
"So you don't like that guy?" He asked somewhat hopefully, although he already knew the answer without even asking him directly. Seeing her nod, a smile formed on his lips, dictating that he still had his way clear, of course, for now.
"That's what I mean by maturing, Naoki-kun" Kotoko said clearly. "There are times when you don't need to see things to know them, sometimes it's just pure intuition"
"You're right" He agreed, discreetly approaching her, moving a few inches from the bench.
"I came to that conclusion" She continued, not realizing that he approached her. "After thinking about it so much in my moments alone in my apartment"
"I see" He said harshly, because when he heard that there were times when Kotoko passed time alone, it unleashed in him a close concern for her well-being. He having everything for his status, he cared for the girl he liked; it was obvious that he would do it at this point that it took to know her.
"Now, if you will tell me what you were listening to?" She eyed him curiously.
"What?" He snapped out.
"Yes, I want to know what you were listening to." She approached him, causing a blush on his cheeks that he effectively hid behind his skin. Kotoko was too impulsive, even for him to deal with.
"Here" He handed her one of his earphones, returning the track. "Don't make scandals" He complained, while she responded by sticking her tongue out in mischief.
"Thank you" She said as she placed the earphone on her ear.
When he started the song, she cried out with excitement.
"I know this song!"
"Obviously" He snorted, folding his arms in an aristocratic manner.
As both of them became engrossed in listening to the song, Naoki knew that he didn't need to see the surroundings to know that his feelings for Kotoko grew every day without limits.
There was no end to them, as they were already in tune with his anatomy.
And so, the summer holidays arrived for the genius, who hoped that things would work in his favor.
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P.S. (Mention of the song "No necesito verte (Para saberlo)" from Soda Stereo)
