Hogwarts a History – The eyes have halls
Chapter 07 – Day off
…
"Look out! Coming through!"
"Homework. Homework? Has anyone seen my homework?"
"Oh Merlin! I'm gonna be late!"
"Watch where you're going!"
"No running in the halls!"
"Has anyone seen my homework?"
"Is this it? Ew, it's got jelly all over it."
"You don't really think he does, do you?"
"Why not? Who'd stop him?"
"Do we really have to go?"
"You can't just skip class because you feel like it."
"What if I were ill?"
"You don't look ill."
"I will be if I have to sit through another class with Lockhart."
"You're not skipping."
"Gaaaaaah!"
So much NOISE!
That, she surmised, was the problem with living in a crowded castle. You never had a moments peace because there was always somebody who didn't know when to Shut The Hell Up. In this instance, the hall was full of them.
"Charms! I thought we had transfiguration next."
"At least it's not potions."
After the purple daffodil epiphany, and subsequent un-epiphany, Mrs. Norris had been given cause to think about the direction of her life. Conclusion, she was well overdue for a day off.
"It's this way, isn't it?"
"I thought it was this way."
"Ugh. Why does this place not have a map?"
Now if only she could find somewhere that wasn't crowded by mouth breathing cretins.
"Mrow!"
Abandoning her warm spot in the sun, she went in search of somewhere a little more quiet. Even in the daytime the little humans gave as much space as they could when they saw her coming. Normally she would stare, just to remind them she was watching, but today she paid them no mind. They weren't her problem. It was her day off.
A small window in an empty classroom seemed a likely spot; minutes later she was snoozing away quietly, never noticing the nondescript trio sneak into the room. Coincidentally, they hadn't noticed her either.
"You're sure about this?"
"Trust me, it's easy. You're just overthinking it."
"I hope you're not underthinking it."
A series of pops and bangs woke the cat. Spotting the source, her first instinct was to stalk up and scare the bajeebas out of them. Then she remembered it was her day off and determined to go back to sleep. With any luck, they'd leave on their own soon enough.
Funny thing, luck.
"Ah ha, I got it."
A concentrated ball of light, spitting like the tail end of a rocket, hovered above his outheld wand.
"Great—now what?"
"Put it out before you lose control like last time."
"Oh, stop worrying. I got this."
To prove his point, he waggled the wand back and forth, trailing the ball behind. This was fine, though perhaps not for the hearts of his compatriots, until his wrist smacked against the desk and the wand went clattering to the floor.
The spluttering ball did not follow it
Spitting like an angry cat, it shot around the room almost faster than the eye could track. It was a mad bit of ricochet. Even had her eyes been open she might not have seen it coming but come it did.
A blast of sparks erupted when it made contact with the window ledge and Mrs. Norris leapt, yowling the yowl of a cat startled out of a half descent sleep. Not as harrowing as the yowl of a cat startled awake from a deep sleep, but it was enough to send the intrepid students running in panic.
Flinging the door open provided egress for their spell which zipped over their heads and into the hall.
"We are in so much trouble."
You are if I get ahold of you.
It was her day off dang it. What part of that couldn't people understand?
Leaping from her perch she bounded after the trio. Quickly catching up, she just as quickly wished she hadn't. Their wild spell had multiplied and was bouncing off everything. One had gotten into a suit of armor which jerked and twitched like it were alive, also recently tazed.
"Eek! Do something!"
Quickly!
"Like what?"
"Make them stop."
"How?"
"Duck!"
Goose!
A long string of sputtering orbs flew their direction, and everyone dove out of the way. Seeing the way things were going, Mrs. Norris decided it wasn't worth the trouble and made to leave. The jumping suit of armor chose that moment to fall apart and release the dozens of little bouncing spells it had been holding in.
The spells went every which way and Mrs. Norris jumped, goosed, and scrambled to avoid getting hit. She didn't know what would happen if she did get hit, but she wasn't keen to find out either.
Spotting one of the small passages she used to circumvent the halls, she ran, then dove to safety, not daring to stop till she was out the other side.
Stupid—crazy—wizards!
"Me—ow!" the poor cat panted.
Day off. Day off! It should not be this hard to find a quiet patch of sun to sleep in.
She'd barely begun to think about finding another when a door down the hall flew open and a tall gangly youth came running out with a toad—no, frog, frog on his head.
"Run for your lives!" he screamed to the almost empty hall. "It's the frog apocalypse!"
Mrs. Norris threw a gimlet eye at the clearly touched young man as he flew by in a panic. One frog did not the apocalypse make. Nor did two, or three, four, five, twelve, twenty-seven…
She began to reconsider her stance around ninety-four. At one hundred and twelve she could only mewl because they burst from the room in a swelling wave, forcing her to lose count.
Oh, sweet merciful…
"Mrooooooow!" she wailed as she was swept away by the amphibian tide.
She needed a day off from her day off.
