Authors Notes: Quotation / Lyric for this chapter gets around my rule of nothing past 2015 since the song was technically written in 2013? I think this chapter took a little longer than I thought it would because of trying to factor in how the crap Sam could be anywhere near a redeemable love interest after he's been an asshole (like just because he's an asshole, Demon Blood had nothing to do with it) and how to get through a plot line I sorta wanted to avoid.


"Since you admitted it, I keep picturing
Her lips on your neck, I can't unsee it
I hate that because of you, I can't love you
Babe"

-Taylor Swift

Meg gave him an earful when he tried to call Kat. He said he was on his way back to the motel if they were still there. Coldly she said they would wait for him. With a sigh he looked at himself in the mirror. His hands adjusted his shirt and tried to brush down his hair. He pulled the key out of the car. Just a false lead, he'd say. Not an entire lie. If it was a half truth it was easier to tell. He opened the car door. He tried to not think about how hours before Amelia had found him at the bar, had convinced him to get a motel room with her, and begged him to consider getting back together. Instead he walked towards his doom. He walked towards a future that would only keep him trapped in the hunting life, in a life where there was nothing but pain and suffering and death. Two days and he could go back to Amelia and go back to a life that was normal.

Kat looked up at him. Her eyes were puffy as if she'd stopped crying.

"False lead," he said.

"Okay," she said coolly.

Meg grabbed onto him as Alfie grabbed onto Kat.

They landed back in the cabin. He saw Jo lying on the couch and then he heard Dean walk in behind them. His hair was damp and he wore some band t-shirt.

"What were you guys up to? Missed ya there," Dean grinned.

"Meg was a damsel, had to save her," Kat shrugged.

"Nice, no casualties I see," Dean said.

"What about you guys? Just hang out here?" Sam asked.

"Yeah we just hung out. Hey, heard anything from Kevin about the demon tablet? This gates of hell thing?" Dean asked.

"Nothing," Sam said.

"Maybe we'll hit something today," Dean responded.

It was reeking of half truths and lies.

Kat looked up at Sam as he was busy looking around. When he came back to the motel he smelled like liquor and a floral scent. The florally perfumey smell was odd. She could feel her heart starting to race as she thought about it.


Jo was in Heaven. Or, at least it looked like she was. It was in the white office room with the minimal style white office furniture. There were windows to her left, but it just looked like another blank white room next to her. Then she saw Naomi behind her desk. A dusty grey pantsuit and her immaculately kept up brown hair.

"Hello Joanna Beth," Naomi smiled.

"Have I done something wrong?" Jo asked. "I'm not... dead... am I?"

Naomi gave a laugh.

"No, dear. Just a little check in. And you're not dead, just sleeping. The subconscious is the most accessible for meetings," Naomi said. "So tell me, how are things on Earth? Any closer to accomplishing your task?"

"Erm, no," Jo admitted. Naomi looked at her in distain. "But Castiel has showed up a few times. He doesn't know what you're doing to him. And then that, that girl, brought this angel home. Sam something, I think. But the boys call him Alfie. He practically worships her! And uh he's determined to find this archangel that he thinks should rule Heaven, so Dean told me."

"Samandriel is looking for the Archangel... Well, that just won't do. He'll need to be chipped again."

"Chipped?"

"That girl is a danger and a menace. Samandriel was always a faithful follower. If she can corrupt him faster than a Winchester you must heed your job."

"I'm trying to but the Winchesters..."

"Should not be a concern of yours. We had an agreement, you do the task we assigned you and we bring your mother out of Hell and give her paradise. Or, we throw you back into the ground. Back into Hell, and I'll even arrange for you to be on the other side of Hell away from your mother."

Her breath got caught in her throat. Naomi gave a sinister smile.


After getting Meg out, Kat had the demon lead her to the Angel tablet that had been concealed. It hadn't been very hard, and there hadn't been an ambush. This was happening months in advance before anyone would think about it.

"What's so important about this tablet again anyway?" Meg asked her.

Kat pulled out the tablet. It felt heavy and old in her arms.

"It means that Castiel will not fall and the angels will not seek him out," Kat said. "So long as I destroy it."

She channeled the angelic powers. The tablet glowed before it evaporated into pure white dust. Her hand waved through the dust and it flew in different directions. The dust turned into atoms.


There was something off about Sam, and Dean didn't know where to quite place it. Kat didn't press about where he and Jo had been; he assumed that she thought that they had just stayed at the cabin. He didn't press about where their little group had went off to. Although he did need to ask Sam what had happened to him. Jo had gotten up and walked into the kitchen where he was lingering on his beer and Kat was researching.

"Hey Kat, do you want to help me make dinner for tonight?" Jo asked, she tilted her head and her hair twirled behind her.

"Um, sure," Kat said.

"Great, I'm thinking maybe a roast and mashed potatoes..."

Dean found himself tuning himself out thinking about the food instead. Jo grabbed Kat and waved at him.

"We're going to the store!" Jo beamed.

"Okay," he said, still daydreaming over the roast.

His daydream was broken when Sam walked in with a handful of papers.

"I think I found a case for us out in Wyoming," Sam said. He didn't miss the sneer on his brother's face. "What? What's wrong? What did I do?"

"Thanks for the case Sammy. You've just... seemed a little off since you came back," Dean said coolly.

"Everything's fine Dean. Now do you want me to explain this case or not?"

"Sure 'bout that?"

He saw his brother grapple with himself. Dean leaned himself against the kitchen counter.

"I er, might've accidentally got a dose of demon blood in an attack and... might've slept with Kat again before it was fully out of my system... and then I got a phony text from Amelia saying she was in trouble... and... and I can't tell Kat. Not again," Sam admitted. His head hung in defeat.

"You cheated on Kat again?" Dean shouted.

Sure, he was okay with the idea of the two of them getting along again. It made for less nauseating road trips. She might've gotten colder and harder in the last year but he knew that soft girl with a compassionate heart still existed. Even if she didn't fully know the first time that she and his brother broke up due to his affair, she didn't deserve this. Not again. And maybe 'cheat' was too harsh, proper, of a word. Frankly, he didn't know how else to explain it.

Sam wasn't denying it.

"Oh god," Dean said, looking at his boots.

"It's not like I meant to, I was tricked!" Sam tried to retort.

"She thinks the world of you, Sam."

"I know, I know, and I didn't mean it!"

"You're not going to tell her are you?"

"...No."

"Dammit Sam!"


Jo was making no progress at all with the Winchester girl. Kat was quiet, too quiet. She responded to her questions one word or with shrugs. Her love for Dean was genuine. It was the appearance of the doting loving Hunter that was draining. Her days in Purgatory, and Hell, had hardened her. Jo considered her last year on Earth had also contributed to it. Still, she hoped that the whimsical loving persona would make Kat trust her more. Kat Sadler did not trust her at all, so her impressions came. Sister? One. Family? From Maryland, can't talk anymore. She hoped that Kat would spill some sort of weakness. Something she could use that would make it easier to kill the girl. Instead she just seemed lonely.

"What do you think of these carrots?" she beamed at Kat.

"They're fine, is it enough for tonight however?" Kat responded.

She looked over the sack of carrots in her hands.

"I think so," Jo smiled.

Getting Kat to trust her was hard. It would be easier for the group to be less suspicious of the imminent death if they believed that Jo cared about her enough to think that she didn't have a hand in it. Which did make her feel bad, she didn't like killing humans or mostly human things. But Naomi had given her a job and truthfully, it was for the greater good in the long run.

The cracking point when she asked if they needed desert and Kat went in about how she needed to make brownies and maybe get materials for a pie. She hadn't had a lot of time to bake recently, and brownies seemed like the easier thing for her to do at the moment. Jo was surprised as to how many things could go into making boxed brownies.


Naomi paced her office in Heaven trying to figure out what to do about the angel Samandriel. He wasn't overly powerful for as low of a rank as he was. Yet he was trying to defy Heaven, defy Her, for some puny little mortal. A mortal that had accessibility to an archangel that should be dead. That was dangerous. They would abandon their loyalty to her, an era of piece, for some damned archangel that only promised destruction once more. She did think back to the time that Samandriel had shown up. Unlike the other angels upon creation, Samandriel had this childish wonder. He was not listed in any of the castes. The lower level angels were just filtering out the last of them in production. She'd created a place for Samandriel in a rank. Escorted him to his new angel peers.

There was always something that was wrong with Samandriel.

At the moment her underlings had dragged in Castiel.

"Back so soon?" she asked.

"I can't find the Angel Tablet," he growled. "Release me."

"You are defiant, Castiel. I cannot chance that. Have the Winchesters found anything out about the other remaining tablets?"

"No, none that I've seen."

"And the angel Samandriel?"

"His presence consistently follows Katrina. Even she's not fully aware of it when he goes invisible to hide himself from her."

"So... he's very protective of this... human. Still."

Castiel looked at her anxiously. Naomi tried to calculate her next move.

"Find out what Samandriel knows about the angel tablet. It's location. He's always been different and his time around That Girl would have me believe he knows more about it's location. After that," Naomi sighed, sitting behind her desk again. "Kill him."

"Naomi!"

"Your orders are clear, Castiel!"


Dean was relieved as to how well Jo and Kat were getting along since returning. If anyone was going to start a fight or have any animosity it was going to be him, so he rather everyone else support onto each other before the ticker went off. And dinner was pleasant. Kat had made dessert again. The first time in a while. It was a perfect family dinner.

If only Sam had played his part better.

Kat kept trying to say funny things. Clever things. He watched and he laughed. Because she was. And Sam barely responded. A small head nod. And he saw her grasp at straws trying to get his attention. And it broke his heart. It broke him that Sam kept sabotaging his life. That he had the perfect opportunity with Kat and he kept screwing things up. He wondered how he'd managed to be the more normal one. Eventually the forced smile fell from her face and he saw her retreat into herself.

He kept the conversation going with Jo. Samandriel glanced between them awkwardly at the table.

Who let the damn angel sit with them?


She saw Sam walk out the back and she hurried her legs after him. Something had changed since he'd gotten back to the motel that day. Something had right as it seemed like things were getting back to where they should. It was getting dark out.

"Sam," she choked out.

"What?" he snapped.

He hadn't even turned around to face her.

"What did I do wrong?" she asked.

She knew very well that she hadn't done anything wrong. It was sabotage to think that she was the problem.

"You didn't do anything wrong," he responded.

"Then tell me what went wrong," she pleaded.

Kat felt herself close to breaking.

"You know, I really liked my life before you came back into it. Because I was at peace, I had friends, and there was a woman who never put me through drama or made me want to put a gun in my mouth. You're insufferable, Kat!" he started spewing. "And I thought we could maybe work again, but then I slept with Amelia again and I just... I don't think we could work."

"When," she said softly.

"Right after I left the motel. I thought she was in trouble."

She fell to her knees. Her eyes were wide in disbelief and her mouth was parted slightly. Her hand covered her mouth as she felt the tears start. A horrible broken wailing sound came out of her. Sam walked past her, unaffected by the confession. Her other arm wrapped around her stomach subconsciously. The rain started coming after that.

She'd sat in the rain with a hiccuping cry. It wasn't quite gone yet and the sky was a dark grey now. Kat felt something on her arm and watched as Samandriel lifted her up and carried her inside. He's seemed to miracle away the wetness once they stepped in the house.

"You shouldn't sit out in the rain," he said. "You'll get sick. You're human."

"There's no point anymore," she said as he stepped away from her. "There's no point."

He looked at her sadly.

"I don't know what I'm doing here anymore," she said softly.

"You're here to help the Winchesters," he said firmly.

"Samandriel, Jo's more qualified to help them, and Sam... doesn't want me around anymore. They don't need me."

"Someone else does."

"Really? Who? Because there's no point in living if it's not with Sam."

"You need rest."

"Maybe I do."

For three days, Kat stayed in her bed under the covers. Dean had tried to get her to eat a few times but she never moved, just staring blankly at the wall. Samandriel occasionally went in with food. She picked at it, and ate whatever sweet he'd end up bringing with him. But she refused to come out of her room. On the forth day the house was quiet and she heard the phone ring. She heard Dean talking to another hunter, and Jo had enthusiastically agreed to go take down the suspected monster. There was hesitation in Sam's voice when they asked if he wanted to go. He said he'd stay behind. Kat wished she still had the angel powers Gabriel had given her in their shared form so she could rip Sam apart limb from limb.

She couldn't, even if she had the ability to do so. Dean called her while they were away. Something about Crowley and Castiel had dropped in for a moment to help, and she voiced how she was glad that Cas was helping them out again. Then he asked her if she was alright and she felt herself freeze. She wasn't, not really. Kat mentioned that Samandriel was still trying to get her to eat but that was as far as she'd let him talk her into. He sounded relieved at that.


Samandriel hadn't quite bonded with the other humans as well as he had with the human Kat. Kat was the name she preferred, he found. Sometimes she'd call him Alfie if she was in a dazed state, but she kept to Samandriel. The human Jo had him on edge with how they knew she was likely allied with Naomi. He remembered hours of torture under Naomi, for the greater good she called it. Sometimes Dean felt familiar to him. Dean was kind to him, although a bit of a crass jokester. Sam had gotten on his nerves with his blatant disrespect for Kat. Although he figured he didn't know about her relationship with the Archangel, just that she'd been possessed for a time.

He didn't like using his powers of persuasion on Kat, but there was little he could do to pull her out of her depressive episode. She was more vulnerable in this state and had threatened to kill herself multiple times to him. He willed her to sleep in those cases. He did worry about the human growing inside of her. It was rapidly growing and he knew something supernatural had made its way into it. Heaven would kill her for the child. Sometimes he prayed to the Archangel that had left Kat, asking that he protect her. The Archangel favored her, whichever one it was. It gave him some relief after Father had left them. Sometimes he doubted he was the product of the Father. Which was a heinous thought, but he felt as though he always functioned a little differently compared to the other angels.

Sam was drinking himself to death when he walked downstairs. A computer was lit in front of him as to give the appearance that he was working and the alcohol wasn't consuming him. Samandriel cloaked himself and walked the perimeter of the house. Then he saw Castiel appear in front of him. He let down his cloak.

"Castiel, what brings you here?" Samandriel asked politely.

"I came to ask you what you knew of the Angel tablet," Castiel asked.

"Brother, I do not know."

"You have been around the human Katrina. She has had access to an Archangel who would've known about it."

"And I do not."

Castiel pulled out his angel blade and Samandriel brought forth his own. He went on the offensive, not understanding the meaning of Castiel's attack. The blades hit each other and let out a piercing cry. But Castiel was the better fighter and he knew Castiel was wearing him down. A deadly blow he couldn't avoid hit him. And another. And he was on the ground. He pushed himself up on his elbows. Castiel loomed over him, ready to strike.

And then something fell in the way.

Samandriel watched as Sam fell to the side. Castiels blade was rooted in his stomach. It seemed to pull Castiel out of a daze.

"What have I done?" Castiel muttered.

"Protect... Kat," Sam said, looking over at the younger angel.

"I'm so sorry, Sam."

"Stuff it Cas."

Cas took out the blade and healed Sam. He looked over. Dean was getting out of the car with Jo. Sam swatted off Samandriels attempts to help him up.

"What happened, Cas?" Dean growled.

"I'm sorry," Castiel said.

Then he vanished. Dean looked at the remaining angel with a death stare.

"Sam took a blade that was meant for me. I was Castiel's target," Samandriel said.

"He healed me, Dean," Sam added.

"Well, the bastard sent us on a wild goose chase," Dean said. "But I'm glad you're alright Sammy, and Alfie."

Samandriel nodded.

"Has Kat gotten out of bed yet?" Jo asked with concern.

"She has not, it's the one thing I can't persuade her to do," Samandriel said.

"I've never seen her this bad," Dean told her. "Delusional breakdowns, maybe. But, god I'm worried about that kid."

Samandriel itched to tell Kat about her condition. Part of him hoped it would make her alive again. The other worried that if the information was spoken out loud then the rest of the universe would hear as well and put her in danger. He'd taken it upon himself to be her guardian angel in the absence of the Archangel but he knew he wasn't strong enough to protect her the way she needed to be.


Sam walked into her room. She stared harder at the wall. All trust had been betrayed. Betrayed by the fact that he kept choosing other people that other woman over her. Then she noticed something odd about the blue shirt he wore.

"Why is there a purple mark on your shirt?" she asked, her voice a mutter.

"I nearly died protecting your angel," he said coldly.

She shot up.

"Castiel was about to kill him but I knew how much that damn angel meant to you, so I took the blade instead," Sam said. "Cas healed me when he realized his mistake."

"Thank you," she forced out.

He started on his way out before pausing.

"I care about you, a lot, Kat. I know you don't believe me right now. But, things are just difficult between us right now," he said.

"It doesn't have to be," she said.

"I think I... I might leave for a while. I'm thinking about it. After all, you did it to me as well."

She wanted to scream that she did because he had cheated on her and she thought he'd walked out on her first. But she didn't. Samandriel walked into the room.

"Oh, it's you," Sam said surprised.

"I have pressing news," Samandriel said.

"What is it?" Kat asked.

"Kat is pregnant," Samandriel said.

"I've put on a couple of pounds since eating again. I don't think that makes me pregnant," Kat snapped.

Sam glanced at the blanket she had pulled up against her. There did seem to be a protruding bump beneath it.

"How would you know this soon?" he asked.

"Because whatever it is, it isn't entirely human," Samandriel said gravely.

"Does it pose a threat to her health where aborting it would be the best option?" Sam pressed.

"Sam," Kat hissed.

"What? You always went on about how you never wanted kids! I'm just making sure there's still options!" Sam snapped.

"If Kat is willing to maintain her well being, she should be fine. It just depends on how fast it decides to grow," Samandriel said. "Would you want to abort it?"

She pressed a hand to her stomach. It didn't feel like much. Sams lips seemed to disappear in a grim look. She looked down at her stomach. Sam was honorable, or so he presented himself. She knew that if she did carry the child to term he would want to take care of it, and be supportive. Of the child at least. If she kept staying in bed, wasting away, then the child would fail. The grim look seemed to fall off of Sam's face as he looked at the angel. Part of her knew that if she decided to abort the child then Sam would have no further obligations to her and he could leave to live happily fucking after with that woman. Even if she banked on him staying out of obligation, it didn't guarantee that he would. It didn't always happen nowadays.

"I'm keeping the child," she said firmly, looking at the two above her.


Authors Note: This is possibly a breakthrough of writers block. But, I'm also having a difficult time writing this because it's just gotten hella depressing. So just be aware that the next update could take another longer stretch to be posted. I didn't kill Samandriel, yayyy! Sam, you're on thin f- ice with me right now. But anyway, let me know what you thought about this chapter. If you want me to keep updating. Thoughts are on Kat's pregnancy? Jo being like That. I love hearing what you guys think about. xx