Lovesick: Complication

Lan managed to find calm in the massive hospital. The roof before dawn was near deserted, everyone in their own corner, Lan the only non-employee. They would have much preferred her gone hours ago, but a Hunter License and a bad attitude convinced even the burliest security guards to fuck off.

She should have gone back to the hotel to sleep. She just knew she wouldn't.

Guilt didn't cover it. Every other passing thought whipped her back to the fact she had abandoned Morel, Knuckle, and Shoot when they needed help the most. Any help. Even hers. Knuckle may be up and about, but that meant she had his company the most. He always made her feel the guiltiest. The Chimera Ants with them just offered further proof she fucked up. And, a cherry on top of her regret, she was staying near because they were her only help when Sybil remembered she existed.

The election wasn't helping her nerves, either. The first round was useless. Then her Sybil protection disappeared, and she refused to go with him and his assassin friend— his invitation made it very unclear if they were doing something not sex related. The second vote was just as useless, the minor relief of Sybil's absence not making up for wasted time. Lan skipped the third along with a couple dozen others to force a revote under the ridiculous ninety-five percent attendance rule. The fourth barely made progress, just narrowed down the contenders to sixteen at the price of a returned Sybil. The longer she was here without Hisoka, somehow, her life expectancy plummeted. The only way this would get worse was if they forced them into a room until this nonsense was done. Because Sybil wouldn't care.

Between the crippling guilt, nagging paranoia, and residual fear, she knew sleep was out the question, so why even try?

The door opening made her tense. Escape route would be cutting the safety bars over the ledge, jumping, using Nemmi to shove her into a window, and running. Sad, how she had thought of that two seconds after stepping onto the roof. Quiet and soft, the door closed again, her nerves still sky high. Nemmi shuffled on her shoulder, calling for attention but not for panic.

She glanced behind her, vague recognition settling her worry. The small woman with rabbit teeth and thin grey hair, she had been there to see Gon. A lot of people came to see Gon…

She approached, perhaps with that same vague recognition, but with a disregard for the way Lan's eyes narrowed. Maybe because she didn't freely fling around her aura in warning, once again without that outlet under the threat of Sybil locating her.

Silence broke softly. "You seem troubled," the short woman said, tone gentle and soothing. It was nice, familiar in a way that wanted to pull heartstrings. Lan bit her lip. Yun. This woman sounded like Yun.

"I must look awful if you picked that up on a glance." Lan hated the overly harsh edge that leached into her voice. She was the one that thought of Yun, not this stranger with perhaps, for once, good intentions.

"No." She shook her head for emphasis, voice still soft and not the least bit put off by Lan's tone. "Not at all. Perhaps tired, but that's expected. Hospitals are restless places." Lan silently agreed, the pause heavy as her reason for being here ate at her. "Your heart's melody is more of a requiem. Heavy and lonesome, like you lost someone dear."

She tilted her head slightly. Had she meant that metaphorically? Or did she come up with that based on the fact this was a hospital? Or did she actually hear this in her heartbeat? The other woman just smiled pleasantly. Lan looked away. Didn't matter, really. "Slowly losing someone."

More like everyone. Through her own fault. The longer she sat in limbo with her decisions, the further away she pushed everyone, the more she hated herself for doing it. But what was new? She had been so scared of how much she had liked Yun that she may as well have faked her death in how completely she cut contact. Chrollo and Hisoka only avoided that because they were very difficult to hide from forever. Though, in a way, she wanted Chrollo to come after her. And then never leave again. If Auntie weren't as stubborn as Lan, she would have given up on Lan years ago for all the crap she put her through. The Phantom Troupe would be the shove over the edge.

"I understand." Her expression, gaze far in the distance with sadness in her voice, Lan struggled find even a half-truth. Lan looked away, not wanting her expression read in return. Genuinely kind people baffled her. "When a friend is on a self-destructive path… It's hard to watch someone you care for losing themselves to pain."

The subject would move away from her or end. Yun always promoted oversharing. "You're one of Gon's friends." A statement, an end, yet even then the subject change didn't faze her.

"Melody." She smiled pleasantly, buck teeth not detracting. "And more of a friend of a friend, I suppose. We only met briefly, but he left an impression."

Lan nodded. One conversation had been enough to remember Gon as more than Hisoka's pet project. "His dad won't even go see him," she mumbled, annoyed. She had no reason to get invested in their drama but… His father wouldn't go see his dying kid and it just annoyed her, okay? Abandoning your dying child… She could watch Leorio punch Ging for hours. "My name's Lanfen," she offered, deciding on her full name. Knuckle or someone else may have already introduced her. And people just didn't walk up to strangers commenting on the mood unless they wanted something. Melody seemed harmless enough, but that may be the sleep deprivation and Yun comparison talking. "Knuckle is…" It felt wrong to call him a friend when she certainly didn't treat him as well as he deserved. "Morel…" Is or was? Did she really deserve to still call him her mentor? All of her relationships were falling apart one by one…

"You feel guilty for not helping them," Melody said, knowing more than guessing. Lan's hesitance may have hinted, but still. Could she truly hear that in a heartbeat? Nen mysteries were more fun to resolve than the reasons to her misery. "They aren't angry with you. Knuckle's heartbeat flutters with happiness whenever he sees you."

"It shouldn't."

Nemmi hopped from her shoulder to the ledge. Graceful and quiet as he may be, Melody's eyes went to him even without using Gyo. As Lan pet Nemmi in mock comfort, she smiled bitterly. She had hyper-sensitive hearing that apparently acted as a polygraph. The absolute worst conversation partner for someone like Lan, her half-truths present in deliberate omissions.

Chrollo lied much the same way, didn't he?

She stepped back from the edge, Nemmi returning to her shoulder. Melody had proven herself too dangerous.

"I hope your friend finds peace," Melody whispered, not pursuing Lan as she walked away.

"Doubtful," Lan whispered in return, hope nearly lost.

What did peace mean? Certainly not isolation.


The call went unanswered.

Maybe she had forsaken him. It had crossed his mind when she hadn't acknowledged his last call.

Chrollo could accept that. He may even feel a touch proud at her decision to damn him for his behavior. With a bizarre sense of accountability, he understood leaving as he had had been incredibly inappropriate and conceivably awful.

Self-sabotage had motivated him.

Fever-driven delirium had given him the brilliant idea to tell her he loved her to control her. A word and a letter in, he realized too late. She knew what he had been about to say. She would assume he was lying. And maybe he was. He never considered himself capable of anything more than narcissism. Until perhaps that moment. Except, even then, he didn't know how, exactly, he felt towards her. At least, assuming, she never joined the Phantom Troupe. He loved the Spiders like he loved himself. They were him. Yet, loving someone outside that…

If she had decided to never contact him again, the debate died with their relationship. He should have left the choice to her. The matter was already taken care of, he shouldn't use it as an excuse to talk to her. But, ultimately, he was selfish.

Ringing dying to static silence, a hesitant breath before speaking, the moment felt like an eternity.

"Chrollo?"

Timid, unsure, hurt, hopeful, every twisted emotion in his name, he savored it. As ridiculous as one of Lanfen's romances, he missed her voice.

"Lanfen," he said, wondering if she felt the same. In the pause, he wiped blood from his nose. "Where are you?"

The Hunter Association was holding an election for a new chairman, the rules about participation stringent. He imagined it would enter a stalemate because of lacking attendance. If they threatened her license, Lanfen would then be coerced into making an appearance. Shalnark agreed that was the action they would most likely take against absentees, though he would never attend no matter the consequences. Sybil, however-

"The Hunter Association." Her answer hit him harder than the metal that had broken his nose. What possessed her to go there? "Sybil is around," she continued, stating an obvious concern. Had she avoided Sybil thus far? Lanfen was good at hiding, but Sybil's aura tended to set her on edge… "So was Hisoka," she added, answering his unasked question while raising a different concern. "Briefly."

Something had pulled Hisoka away from a gathering of playthings and Lanfen? He hummed at the oddity of that.

"Sybil should not cause you further trouble during the election." Wiping the last tacky blood from his nose, he smiled slightly. He ensured that. Sybil held few things dear. He already stolen a piece of her in the form of Indoor Fish. That left Apocalypse Countdown… and Circe.

"Did you kill Circe?" An accusation, he imagined her brows were knitted together, her lips quirked into a pout. He wanted more than to imagine.

"Death isn't punishment enough," he repeated, reassured. She had said that, if he sought revenge on her behalf, death would be too merciful. His hypocrite, for not wanting to seek revenge, she had asked him to make it hurt. "I remember, Lanfen. You needn't worry." He would honor that clause, just for her. Though, perhaps, not entirely for her alone. Time hadn't ebbed his irritation as much as it should have. In fact, passed time without retribution warped irritation to anger. A prolonged death, with poison and torture to mirror their treatment of her, would satisfy him more.

Machi stepped back. A superficial flesh wound, she had quickly finished stitching his shoulder. As if to not interrupt, she began mending his jacket unprompted, eyeing him and his pleasant tone.

If Sybil's weakness was Circe, then it was glaringly obvious that Minji was hers. He hadn't expected Minji to break his nose with the intent of forcing bone into his brain. He would also admit he still let her fist land to see if her highly specialized ability had any use. Circe had been as forgiving as expected, his shoulder gouged deep, but she was hardly an issue with Minji in hand.

In the end, in protecting Lanfen, he also gained himself a present.

"Are you otherwise fine?"

"I…" In her trailing words, he could hear her eyes drift to the ground, glimmer lost to doubt. "Yeah. I'm fine." A lie. An obvious one at that.

"I left a gift in your room."

He had expected her to return to her safe-haven, but she had been absent, her aunt not forthcoming with her location. The old woman had become bolder in her insistence he leave with his stolen goods and never return. He doubted she informed Lanfen of his visit, nor that he had left her anything. Although, had her aunt disposed of it, Lanfen would be upset.

That said, his present was hardly an adequate apology. She would be more appreciative of an in-person apology with an admission of guilt and an explanation why. That isn't to say she wouldn't forgive him without a decent apology, she would, and he knew that. The fact he didn't want to take advantage of that said something.

Mostly that he could understand right and wrong if he bothered to care about consequences.

Shalnark glanced up from his laptop and phone, smiling as he reported "Got it!" Too quick… Chrollo felt reluctant. He wanted more. More than a voice alone could provide, but since he couldn't see her this moment, her voice would have to suffice.

"Goodbye, Lanfen," he said, silence heavy. He had killed the option of pleasant conversation. Without apologizing, withholding the affection he sought became his punishment. Wordlessly, she hung up. He said, "I'll see you soon." to a dead line, wondering if that addition would have brought her hope or dread.

"Want to know where she is?"

"Thank you, Shalnark," Chrollo paused as Machi offered his mended coat, "but that isn't necessary." Shalnark tilted his head, aware that Lanfen had hung up before he'd finished speaking. He had been part of the call, after all. "Not currently," he added. He wanted to track her phone to find her after he concluded a few final pieces of Troupe business. And, should she find herself in trouble during the election, he could send a few Spiders to collect her. Shal assumed he wanted it because she hid from him. Which may be partially true. He couldn't apologize if she disappeared, as she tended to do. Either motive, he probably shouldn't have done it. She wouldn't like it.

"And thank you, Machi." He smiled slightly at her blank expression.

She wanted to believe the tone he took with Lanfen was a manipulative front, but he gave her every reason to know otherwise. Lanfen was sentimental at heart, yet also not materialistic. Finding her a meaningful gift had required him to avoid the common cliché of jewelry only to fall for something far more childish. Machi's face when he asked her to recreate it, she agreed that he had completely lost his mind.

Machi and Shalnark's combined reaction only proved he acted with truly bizarre affection towards Lanfen. Even for someone he was 'manipulating.' If it was to the detriment of the Spider remained the question. He would continue testing reactions.

He rolled his shoulder after pulling on his coat, twinges of pain ignored. "I feel much better," he added, an afterthought to himself.

Because she had answered, at least.


The election concluded days late with Pariston as the chairman… for a few seconds. The fact Cheadle won should have stifled his irritation over the results, but it hadn't. Pariston had made the election a game. If this had been over days ago, then-

Calm down. They could act now.

"There's a connection," Roeis stated, trying to distance emotion from evidence.

He couldn't have prevented what happened. Isma had deemed the election more important than haphazardly chasing after known criminals; Roeis even agreed, since Pariston wanted Hunters to leave to further stall.

Roeis went against Isma's advice to investigate the aftermath. Numerous civilians braindead with a manipulator's needles, he saw Illumi's work first hand in the morgue. As well as a number of temps and licensed Hunters, murdered by both Illumi and a second assailant. The same that had killed Teradein in Seirin Group's headquarters. The thin clean wounds, he was positive they came from Nen-reinforced playing cards.

"She may not-" No, she wasn't. He had no evidence against her in this case. Had she been, he wouldn't need to justify pursuing her. "She wasn't directly involved in the Seirin Group's murders." A high-profile case witnessed by the entire association, direct involvement would have led to immediate persecution. "But she warrants investigation, if only to bring Hisoka and Illumi to justice." The two had disappeared. She may know where, given her documented association with Hisoka. Recording that call hadn't been for nothing.

Isma nodded, standing, finally leaving his desk to act after months of prodding. It took one following step for Isma to hold up his hand.

"Alone, Roeis." Stern, it sounded like an order not to be rescinded. Roeis felt his brief satisfaction slip back to frustration. "Your emotional investment is dangerous." The beginnings of a lecture, Roeis opened his mouth, Isma talking over complaints. "She is cautious. If you approach, you may not be so lucky as to escape."

"I can-" He swallowed his words. No. He couldn't. She was reluctant to answer any question, no matter how insignificant. Even if he managed to strike enough answers to issue a command, he would be placing his hand in a beartrap. Her Nen was solely made to kill.

"Everyone has a role to fulfill." Isma placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. It's not that he was preventing him from helping to be cruel; Roeis' insecurities just made him feel like it. "Your investigation will be invaluable during the trial. Leave taking her into custody to someone better suited for battle."

Roeis reluctantly nodded. Battle wasn't his place; it never was. He hated the active rendering of flesh. Killing that chameleon during the exam had him in tears; he barely made it back by the deadline because he had to drag the bleeding corpse with him as a reminder. Anyone paying attention would have seen his little celebration was fake. He lost his nerve at a lizard, forget an active role in killing a person.

Another pat called his attention from the floor. Isma's voice lost its edge, his expression softening from a hardened Hunter to an old man that'd seen too many untimely deaths. "I do not wish to lose another student, Roeis."

His eyes darted to the side with preemptive guilt. "I understand." But she kept dangerous company. To face them alone…

"Assuming she has not disappeared," his voice once again stern, Isma turned, "I will bring Lanfen in for questioning. Foremost to find Hisoka and Illumi, but for Bando and Lino as well." He stood by the door, looking back, deep set frown in place, with a final reassurance and order. "When the time comes, you will have your chance to assist in bringing them justice. In the meantime, wait here, be safe."

"All right."

The closing door echoed on tile, footsteps outside fading to nothingness.

Ten minutes.

Roeis stood in place for exactly ten minutes before following.


Lan walked through the deserted hallway of the hotel, florescent lights too bright for the midnight hour. She squinted at her phone, debating.

The election over and the pieces of her strained relationship with Knuckle taped together, she needed to decide what to do next. Nemmi perched on her shoulder, peeking at her phone, the screen dark. He chirped as she fiddled with it.

Chrollo had bought it for her when she refused to stop using her broken one, the screen so shattered glass flaked off in chunks.

She had been a bit… rude. Nemmi ruffled his feathers, not rude enough. And he was probably right. She shouldn't have answered at all, never mind that her sleep deprived brain wanted comfort. Nemmi squawked again, stomping his feet. Chrollo had been absolutely cruel in abandoning her after almost saying he loved her. He didn't deserve any attention. Acting concerned about Sybil, his lovesick tone, she wanted to slap him. Instead she just hung up on him- and regretted it enough to debate calling back, lovesick herself. The supposed gift he left her at home, if it wasn't an apology… Maybe that's why Auntie never mentioned him collecting his things. Lan said they had broken up, sort of, in a way. Felt like it.

Nemmi yanked at her hair.

"Yeah," she mumbled, "I need a nap." Her thoughts had been left to run wild too long. Her emotions went right along with them.

She exchanged her phone for a room key.

Opening the door, she was no longer alone.


A/N: I love Melody. Like, seriously, I love her, she is precious, and she needs to be protected at all costs. So, she can start talking some sense into Lan. Also, Chrollo feels things and it's an entire problem. That he recognizes as a problem. So, what does he do? He starts having the Troupe help him. Which is a different problem.

Don't know if I mentioned it, but I have an AO3 account where I'm posting a more edited version of this story (Mostly for consistency, since I sometimes do things like take a throw away character and make them important 40 chapters later- Roeis. Also, cleaning up clutter.)

Thanks for reading! Please let me know what you think!

Amber- Thank you for reviewing! It makes me so happy to hear that you liked my ocs, because, yeah, there are quite a few and I really did want them all to have unique abilities and personalities, even the side characters/antagonists. Lan and Chrollo both have warped views about their own humanity, their upbringing a central cause, Chrollo's disillusionment is just worse because he didn't have an Auntie. His experiment was definitely him dabbling in it after seeing enough similarities to consider her a proper substitute for the humanity he thinks he lacks. And Hisoka is just a slimy bastard we love, lol. It may take a minute to catch chapters up on AO3, but I hope to see you around here or there!